Obama Tags Middle Class With Tax Hikes, Congress Wants Answers About Tsarnaevs, Colorado Cops Not Keen on Pot: P.M. Links


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  1. Members of Congress want to know if federal agencies may have once again failed to connect the dots when it comes to interpreting their information about Tamerlan Tsarnaev.

    The system worked?

    1. Let’s set up another agency to watchdog the agencies!

      1. The Even-More-Central Intelligence Agency

        1. Department of Homeplanet Security.

      2. You mean a watchdog agency to watchdog the watchdog agencies.

        1. It”s agencies all the way down

    2. I wonder if the government has grown even more incompetent under this administration, or if it’s just gotten worse at hiding it.

      Wait, I know: they just give less of a shit if we see it, because we can’t do Jack about it!

      1. Worse at hiding it and probably a bit more incompetent.

        1. If you know about it then journalists aren’t doing their job.

          1. Well, you have to admit the journalists have grown more incompetent too, so that makes sense.

            1. Well that’s what happens when your business model is a total failure and you have to rely on people who will basically work for Obama bumper stickers.

              1. “We can’t pay you, but Obama will let you blow him when he comes through.”

                “I’ll take the job!”

                1. “Wait, eye contact or no eye contact?”

    3. If only they had some way to ‘fuse’ all the intelligence they gather…

      1. If only there were some kind of mass information distribution system. Some kind of net that could connect various buildings and locations.

  2. People poking through President Obama’s proposed budget noticed that it very definitely breaks his promise to not hike taxes on those making less than $250,000 per year.

    Let me be clear: you re-elected me so you can all go fuck yourselves.

    1. To be fair, when he made that promise he was running for office.

    2. those fuckers deserve every bit of it. But the rest of us have to suffer.

    3. I paid more this year in federal taxes despite having the exact same income and exact same deductions. And I earn far far less than $250,000 a year. Fuck you Obama, fuck you and the press you rode in on.

      1. He raised taxes on cigarettes in the first few months. The majority of smokers make less than $250,000 a year.

      2. The payroll tax “holiday” ended.

    4. He had already broken that promise back in his first term when he raised tobacco taxes to pay for the SCHIP program.

      1. By two minutes!

  3. The feds are looking at a new suspect in the case of the ricin-tainted letters.

    It could be… YOU!

    1. Are you trying to frighten us already paranoid nutjobs?

    2. “Do you now or have you ever cooked castor beans?”

    3. Pretty much 100% chance another innocent person would be rotting in their cages had this dude ever done a ricin search on his computer.

    1. I mean, he did go to an Ivy League school, so I thought that was a given. What?? They don’t accept students based only on grades?

      1. Did you read the linked puff piece?

        1. I don’t know how accurate that piece is, but I will say this.

          If you’ve ever seen an unemployed art major tell you how stupid George Bush is, it is unquestionably true that Bush is smarter than that guy.

    2. The press has ingrained the idea that the ability to speak cleverly and glibly is the gold standard of intelligence. Nothing could be further from the truth.

      1. I think one can make a series case that Dubya has some form of dyslexia.

        1. Or even a serious case.

        2. Doubtful. He by all accounts is a voracious reader. Most dyslexics don’t read that well or that much. He just doesn’t speak well off the cuff. Some people don’t.

          1. Bush famously preferred oral briefings to written briefings, as one would expect from a dyslexic but not from an avid reader.

            Dyslexia would explain his Bushisms. His particular verbal errors are very consistent with what one expect from dyslexia.

            1. I think he preferred oral briefings because he liked to grill the people briefing him.

              1. I’ve never read an account of Bush grilling someone.

                1. There’s one posted in this very thread.

            2. Except that dyslexics don’t have problems speaking…

              1. Yes they can. Particularly with word retrieval and confusion combining words, which is what Bush most often presented with. He’d get to a point in a sentence, he’d know the next word, but was unable to recall it. So he’d stumble around or make up a word that kind-of, sort-of was right.

                1. You do know that Obama stumbles around, and speaks about nothing too right. Probably a side effect of politicking

                  1. Dana Carvey hit Obama’s speech pattern on the head when he was on Conan. Excessive verbosity to appear smarter than he is.

          2. He by all accounts is a voracious reader.

            Citation needed.

              1. Thanks Marshall. Amazing how people believe the dumbest media memes.

    3. If I actually read about half of that is that proof that GWB really is smarter than me?

      1. The ability to communicate extemporaneously without hemming and hawing and stuttering and stammering is one measure of intelligence.

        By that measure, Ronald Reagan, GHWB, James Earl Carter, GWB and Obama as well as Teddy K, Joe K, Jr., Joey Biden and Hillary C. all suffer.

        1. Reagan was known to be pretty brilliant off the cuff. He had a wicked sense of humor.

          1. He was awesome reading a prepared speech.

            You do remember all the times Nancy was in his ear feeding him a response to a given query by Sam Donaldson or some other WH reporter?

            1. Did you ever watch his press conferences? Nancy wasn’t feeding him lines there.

              1. Yeah or his debates? Reagan basically got elected because he made Jimmy Carter look like a fool.

                1. Not to mention this:

                  I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent’s youth and inexperience

                  1. Yep. He defused an entire line of attack with a single sentence. The same line that doomed McCain because he didn’t have Reagan’s charisma.

                    1. He did have charisma and tons of it.

                      John is kidding himself though about the press conferences. Sure, at times he was sharp; other times, not so much.

                    2. I mean maybe towards the end as his Alzheimer’s developed. But when he was on….


                2. Reagan basically got elected because he made Jimmy Carter look like a fool.

                  Not exactly a difficult bar to jump, however.

      2. Needs moar Biden.

    4. “The new George W. Bush Presidential Center is being dedicated this week. ”

      It has a (I’m not kidding) “Decision Points Theater.” Which sounds like something you’d find in some kitschy amusement park or as a series on The Military Channel. Not something in a presidential library.

      I think it might just be a scam to promote his book.

      1. If My Pet Goat is not the most-often asked about book there I will donate $1,000 to his library.

      2. I went to both the Reagan and Nixon libraries during a trip to L.A. several years ago, and it’s remarkable how the facilities reflect their namesake’s personalities–Nixon’s has a very stolid and morose atmosphere, while Reagan’s is bright and cheery. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was like this at the other presidential libraries as well.

        1. Will the Obama Library condescend and steal from its visitors?

          1. Nah, it will just reek of deflection and excuse-mongering.

          2. Of course it will. And then blame it on the Bush library.

    5. And if you disagree, you’re a flaming gaywad homo:

      President Bush enjoys interacting with the men and women of our armed forces and with elite athletes. He loves to clear brush on his ranch. He loved interacting with the U.S. Olympic Team. He doesn’t windsurf off Nantucket, he rides a 100K mountain bike ride outside of Waco with wounded warriors. He is an intense, competitive athlete and a “guy’s guy.” His hobbies and habits reinforce a caricature of a [dumb] jock, in contrast to cultural sophisticates who enjoy antiquing and opera.

      Really, Hennessy? You were doing so well…

      1. And I’m not quite sure why wind surfing is a bad thing, but mountain biking is awesome.

      2. If I have to pick between his lifestyle and antiquing and opera, well, it’s not even close–Bushie style for the win!

        1. Not my fault you don’t own White Tie.

          1. I own a tux, but I’m a black-tie guy, myself.

            I wear it when clearing brush at my ranch.

            1. If you are uncultured enough to not wear white-tie while doing yard work, you deserve a horse-whipping.

              1. Please, you clearly know nothing of etiquette. I wear black-tie for evening yard work, and an ascot and tails for the morning.

                1. I’ll agree for the morning suit, I won’t budge an inch and declare yard work to be a semi-formal affair. The snack I take when I am fatigued from raking up leaves is a full 14-course meal served ? la fran?aise.

                  1. My God, man, what do you wear, a suit?

                2. I believe only the top hat is considered standard.

    6. “He loves to clear brush on his ranch.”

      Whatever happened to that ranch? I know he and his wife moved to Dallas.

      1. He cleared all the brush.

        1. ^Almost made me spit out my Coke (The good kind….the legal kind)

      2. They bought the ranch right before the 2000 election specifically for PR purposes. They still own it but apparently they don’t go there very often.

  4. http://rare.us/story/coachella…..ont-exist/

    Fucking hipsters…

    1. That is some grade A trolling there.

    2. Are you so mad right now?

      1. Who me?

        1. No, you’re supposed to say, “I’m SO MAD right now!”

          It’s in the video.

          1. No, you’re supposed to say, etc.

            You have no idea how many times I have to say that to my wife every night. I feel so lonely when she doesn’t or can’t follow along.

            1. Like when I quote Archer and people look at me funny.

              1. Sour mix in a margarita? What is this? Auschwitz?

                1. I only drop that one with people I know have seen the show.

              2. *Looks at Virginian funny*

    3. Sample for those of us currently lacking vid capability?

      1. The interviewer asks Coachella attendees about nonexistent bands. Hipsters then talk about how great these bands that do not exist are.

        1. They were clearly playing along.

        2. Sasha Baron Cohen used to do this with the Bruno shows–he’d run a cape job of bullshit fashionista slang and his marks inevitably tripped over themselves to agree with his assessments to disguise the fact that they had no idea what he was talking about.

    4. Jezebel linked that yesterday with their standard “stupid white people” line.

  5. Russia getting a bit intolerant with critics of the Putin regime? You don’t say.

    In Soviet Russia, Putin regime criticizes you!

    1. You know, why not restore the Romanov dynasty? I’m sure they could come up with some blood tie between Putin and the Romanovs. And if not them, just the tsardom.

      1. I just figured the tsardom had shifted to the western hemisphere, even if we don’t have the Romanovs.

        1. No, that’s czardom–completely different.

          1. Trying to get a gold czar by your name from the teacher?

      2. they could come up with some blood tie between Putin and the Romanovs.

        I think Putin’s ties are to Kalishnikovs

        1. Same thing. He probably should go back to Ivan the Terrible, who he probably could claim some blood tie to.

    2. “”””One, the “foreign agents” law, requires any group receiving foreign funding and engaging in “political activities” to register as a “foreign agent,” the report said.”””

      So foreign agents are forced to register as foreign agents.

      “”””Two of the new laws “clearly seek to limit, or even end, independent advocacy and other NGO work”””

      When did NGO’s become independent, most are paid for by money stolen from taxpayers.

  6. …Colorado cops threatened to call in the feds unless the legislature imposed tight restrictions.

    When mom says no you have to go to dad.

  7. http://www.thedailybeast.com/a…..-work.html

    Fuck yes. I hate the fucking West Wing so much.

    1. as a lobbyist, it’s been fascinating to watch the admin fuck up the gun control bill. total amateur hour. and the bigger crime is they believed their own bullshit.

      1. Yeah, it is one thing in politics to tell everyone that shit smells like roses, it is a sin to believe it.

    2. Good article, but what’s up with all of the typos? My favorite:

      readied themselves to hunt clown the last of the great white chairmen

      Seriously? How does that happen? Did she write this by hand, but her optical character recognition software thought her “d” was a “cl”?

      1. you don’t hunt clown?

      2. I never like to tell people this, but I do transcription and editing for McCardle on the side.

        1. “transcription and editing”

          Is that what they’re calling it these days?

          1. Just don’t tell Suderman.

        2. I never like to tell people this, but I do transcription and editing for McCardle on the side.

          Well played, sir!

      3. I think that section was scanned from an actual physical book and run through an OCR program, and then nobody bothered to go through and error check it.

    3. “Left wing nerds think real life is just like the movies.”

      This is a revelation?

    4. Amazing to read something from the lefties which shows somebody over there understands the truth about the NRA’s power. It’s not about money sent to politicians or the gun industry. It all comes down to a few million members (and fellow travelers) who live in states where their votes count and are basically one issue voters.

      1. It’s Megan McCardle.

        A lot of people here might not think she passes the purity test, but she’s closer to libertarian than anything. She’s hardly a lefty.

  8. ‘People’ declares Gwyneth Palrow the World’s Most Beautiful Woman.

    Nothing against Pltrow who is indeed beautiful, but her?

    1. Your two misspellings of her name would seem to contradict that you have “nothing against Pltrow [sic]”.

      1. I think faster than I can type so I’m prone to spelling mistakes.

      2. Get up off the brotha – you know how hard it is to type with just your left hand. Oh, yes, you know you do.

        1. Stop othering me! I could be left-handed; you don’t know me!!

    2. She was also voted the most hated celebrity in Hollywood

    3. It’s as Gwyneth as the nose on plain’s face.

    4. I don’t usually post these types of things, but it seemed appropriate…somehow to balance the universe.
      HuffPo shows it’s sexy side (WARNING: This is not Gwenyth Paltrow]


        1. She’s decidedly plain-looking. She’d look a lot better if she didn’t have that shit on her arm.

          1. She’s decidedly plain-looking. She’d look a lot better if you stuck Gwenyth Paltrow’s picture on the back of her head.


            1. Is she British? Her teeth are pretty bad

      2. Is there a reason why she got a tattoo that is so poorly done it just makes her arm look dirty? It is like she looked in the mirror and said “I am just not skanky enough”.

        1. A tattoo is automatic DQ. Cindy Crawford 1990s model is the most physically beautiful woman of my lifetime.

          1. Cindy would be up there. and I actually I have learned to have some tolerance for tattoos. I will never like them. But they don’t bug me as much as they once did. But they have to be well done.

            1. It’s weird seeing you two talk normally

      3. Her teeth are brown. Ew.

        1. I noticed that…I could only imagine she hasn’t brushed them in years. Either that or she sucks lemons.

      4. That may be one of the most unflattering dresses I’ve ever seen in my life. I mean, that’s hyperbolic, but…that looks absolutely terrible, and it’s hard to think of what she could have chosen to make herself look worse.

        1. The color is horrific for someone of her skin tone and hair. And anyone over a size 2 would look like a cow in it. And she is most certainly not a size 2.

          1. It also doesn’t fit her. I mean what is going on in front? Put some boobs in that dress! Or take it in!

            1. I mean, I think she’s trying to be ugly. Some kind of weird hipster or feminist rejection of beauty thing. I mean, she’s never going to be hot. But she could look better.

              1. Yeah, but she’s fucking that up too. I’m 100% down with that in concept. But most of the people I see who I think are probably doing it, are not that good at it.

                1. That is just it, that dress is not a “hipster ironic trying to be plain” dress. It is an actual evening gown and probably would look fine properly fitted on the right person.

                  1. Well and also, if you’re trying to look ugly, you pick out something ugly, ridiculous, unflattering, whatever, but it should come within like a 50% margin at least of actually fucking fitting you. Because otherwise people like me are just going to be like, “I’m sorry, I’m confused about why your dress doesn’t fit at all.”

                    1. Nicole, you seem to be a little bit too invested in the sartorial choices of Lena Dunham.

                    2. You don’t even understand me! I don’t care about Lena Dunham at all, only about boob-fit! (And other fits.)

                    3. Stop denying your girl love for Lena Dunham, Nicole. No one is buying it.

                    4. Sadly Nikki, she is probably surrounded by toadies who all told her how fabulously she looked only to snicker behind her back about how her dress didn’t fit.

                    5. Sadly Nikki, she is probably surrounded by toadies who all told her how fabulously she looked only to snicker behind her back about how her dress didn’t fit.

                      I wouldn’t be surprised if Dunham as a flock of gay “friends” who do exactly this.

            2. She has no boobs. And what little boob she has, needs a bra.

              1. She has no boobs. And what little boob she has, needs a bra.

                TOO. BIG.

                And wow, you guys weren’t kidding. She looks absolutely atrocious.

      5. That’s what they consider sideboob?

        This is some real sideboob.

        1. That was nice but I was expecting Lobster Girl. I am disappoint.

    5. Sorry, she’s not. Hell, she’s not even the most beautiful 40 year old woman.

      I bet you women judged this.

      1. I bet you women judged this.

        Women? On this site??? hahahaha

        1. No like I bet the committee on/from People magazine was women and/or gay men.

      2. She most definitely is not.

    6. It is a weirdo Hollywood thing. I don’t get it either. She is just not that attractive. And she certainly isn’t “beautiful” by Hollywood standards. I could home home and flip on the TV right now and withing 30 channels find at least 10 women on TV better looking than her.

    7. Dude, it’s People. Do you need to think about this further?

      1. My wife and I talked about this briefly this morning, after the TV mentioned this nonsense. Even calling these people “The Most Beautiful in the World” is bullshit. The best looking people I’ve ever seen aren’t celebrities at all.

        1. It’s as dumb as listing the best movie of all time. Which is, of course, Young Guns 2.

          1. The best movie of all times starts with an “arm” and ends with a Bruce Willis saving Earth.

            1. Die Hard starts with an arm?

              1. Your knuckle sandwich starts with my arm coming at you. You could have at least gone with The Fifth Element.

                1. I will give you The Fifth Element as another example of greatness. But Die Hard is practically an archetype.

                  1. Well, Die Hard did not have Milla. Otherwise, it was a fine movie.

                    1. Die Hard didn’t need Milla “I can’t act in anything other than Resident Evil movies” Jovovich. It’s sheer awesomeness stands the test of time.

            2. Best movie of all time.

              1. I wholeheartedly agree.

          2. It got the most tears out of me, for sure. Ride on, LDP, ride on.

          3. What, better than Incubus? You just say that because you hate Canadian Jews and good Star Trek.

        2. Or sometimes struggling or lesser known actors. Go to the blog “who is that hot ad girl” sometime. It basically looks up and tells you who the attractive women are in various commercials. None of them are stars and many of them are stunningly beautiful.

          My wife and I are watching the PBS series Mr. Selfridge, about the guy who started the Department Store in London. There are a couple of actresses in it that put Gweneth Palthrow to shame.

          1. By the time you make your breakthrough, beauty can fade. Especially with an LA lifestyle.

          2. Absolutely. The best-looking people on the planet–probably the top million–are not celebrities.

            1. Ever notice the comically long name of a lady on the Family Guy credits? If you have even a passing fancy for Asians, look her up.

              1. You mean Cherry Chevapravatdumrong?

                A rule of thumb for Thai surnames. The more syllables, the higher the family’s status.

                1. That’s not a name, its a sentence without blank spaces. But, yeah, she is prettier than the talent in front of the camera. And she wrote the series’ best episode ( the one where they kill off Diane).

                  On the Nook HD, the tab key will send the page hurling down the bottom of the page. It was a five minute climb to get back up here and complete this post.

                  1. Funny enough, in Thai, there are no spaces between the words in a sentence. Some Thai names are cool. If you translate my wife’s first and last names it means “Dragon-eye Swancry”. She is also a level 35 Druid.

                    1. Jesus, that’s a cool name.

                    2. I like that you’re old school and play the version where you don’t stop at level 30, but everybody knows that the Druid class tops out at The Great Druid well before level 35. So I call shenaningans. Shenanigans!

          3. Look up Emily Ratajkowski, John. Someone has to have the best body on earth, and it’s her.

            1. John says she needs to eat some sammiches.

            2. I love the body. I don’t like the lips. I hate big lips.

              1. I take back every good thing I’ve ever said about you.

                Optical illusion: there are actually lips in this picture.

                1. After close study, I think you are lying.

                2. And here’s more of her. NSFW.

              2. I hate big lips.

                Okay, yesterday I said that Kristen’s taste in action movies was the worst thing I’ve ever seen. Then this happened.

                What the fuck, John.

                1. Her elbows are really sharp too, am I right?

                  1. Her elbows are really sharp too, am I right?

                    I think her knees looked a little knobby. Also, one of her ears is off center by 0.00003 centimeters.

                2. Okay, yesterday I said that Kristen’s taste in action movies was the worst thing I’ve ever seen. Then this happened.

                  Irish, do you really think you can say something is the worst thing you’ve ever seen and not have that topped by H&R within days?

                3. I guess John doesn’t like to get his dick sucked.

                  1. I guess John doesn’t like to get his dick sucked.

                    Someone had to say it. It was almost me. Sorry, HM.

            3. I vote for Cintia Dicker

              http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/cintia dicker

          4. Direct TV girl. Jesus naked posing on a half shell.

            1. I think that girl looks a little creepy.

              She’s hawt, no question, but I can’t place why she comes off that way to me.

              1. Lycanthrope. She has the eyes of a wolf.

            2. Jeter tapped that. But who hasn’t he tapped?

              1. He even tapped one of my ex-girl friends when he played here in the early nineties. Met him. Handsome devil.

          5. Bridgette Lahie. One of the hottest women who ever lived. French porn star in the 70s. And I gotta say, the French were ahead of their time. She’s done everything considered “extreme” today, with the possible exception of double anal.

        3. In 2001, at the height of Halle Berry’s reknown, a black lady friend asked me, ‘I think Berry is the most beautiful woman on the planet, don’t you, Alan?’

          Talk about being put on the spot! I had it in for HB at the time too for cutting her hair too short. Lot of women, including my friend, followed her example, and I dislike short hair.

          BTW, I said, amongst celebrities, Id go with Claudia Schiffer, or better yet, Bridgette Bardot in her prime. Be damned if I’m ever coward by racial senstivities.

          1. I mean Halle Berry looks amazing for her age.


            At least 30 of those are hotter then Paltrow.

            1. Berry was cute as fuck in Cat Woman though a horrible movie.

          2. I always thought Bardot looked like a cheap Paris whore. Give me Catherine DeNeuve if we are talking 60s babes/

            1. mmmm, cheap mid century Paris whore, amongst the finer things.

            2. I vote for Claudia Cadinale:


            3. Ursula Andress

    8. That is fucking Bullshit! I think of a million porn stars I’d much rather jerk off too..

    9. I always thought Jennifer Connelly in “The Rocketeer” was stunningly beautiful.

  9. Fascinating, sad look into collapse of etailer from perspective of comptroller…


    “I would bring the financial statements to Jody who would glance at them so cursorily and wave me away with ‘no one can understand this without extensive analysis,’ Prentiss writes. “Critically, he did not understand margin. At the end of December when things were getting truly desperate, he said to me, ‘Phil, just bring me a forecast that shows how much we need to sell to break even.’ He did not understand, after three years of negative margin, that increased sales resulted in increased losses.

    And this…

    There were some big problems with the management structure too. First and foremost,the VP of Sales was compensated according to sales before discounts, not according to margin or profit. Our discount strategy resulted in enormous losses, but for the VP of sales the strategy optimized his bonus.

    1. First and foremost,the VP of Sales was compensated according to sales before discounts

      I’m guessing ‘Jody’ was once in sales?

    2. He did not understand, after three years of negative margin, that increased sales resulted in increased losses.

      Solyndra actually had this as their business model. By design.

  10. Israel will soon be doing e-mail searches on foreign travelers visiting the country.

    The zionists are going to think I need male enhancements!

    1. And if they strip search you they’ll know it

      1. If they do check down there, they’ll think I’m a fellow Jew and let me right through the door no questions asked. (Curse my parents and U.S. postnatal doctors with their supposed pro-hygiene surgical procedure.)

        1. Here we go. Might as well bring out the deep-dish pizza story while you’re at it.

  11. Inside the offbeat economics department that debunked Reinhart-Rogoff ……..

    But the department’s radical openness to alternate perspectives still sets it apart. “Learn from Marx, learn from Keynes, learn from Hayek,” Pollin says. “One of the biggest influences on me personally was Milton Friedman. He was very engaged with real world questions, and he made no bones about his ideological predilections.”


    Interesting economic face-off here.

    1. Anyone who likes Milton Friedman is fine by me.

      1. Friedman invented withholding, one of the most evil inventions that helps the government steal ever devised.

        Fuck Friedman and horse he rode in on. Nothing can make up for that.

        1. I do like Uncle Milty, but withholding was a huge moral failure.

        2. At least he thought it was a mistake. These days, nobody ever admits error, unless in the “I’m sorry you’re a fuckface” vein.

        3. It definitely helps make tax collection go more smoothly, thereby reducing government waste. Still, there’s something to be said for tabulating taxes at the end of the year to see just how much you’re getting fucked, rather than getting excited about how big your refund is (read: how much you lent Uncle Sam at 0% APR).

          1. It’s one of the primary reasons I like the Property Tax as a revenue mechanism.

          2. Without it, we’d have had a taxpayer revolt long ago.

            1. Step 1: End withholding
              Step 2: Consolidate tax system
              Step 3: ???
              Step 4: Libertopia!

              1. Yes, well, a taxpayer revolt alone isn’t enough, since the government can also inflation us and/or deficit us to death.

  12. They say his name is … Richard something …? Richard Jewell?

    Thanks for the tip. I’m going to tweet this right now.

    1. perhaps you could post his picture on Reddit or 4chan and ask concerned citizens to locate him for you too?

  13. Some guy bought the film rights to Jack Chick’s “Dark Dungeons” tract. The Kickstarter goal is $12,500.

    1. As a comics fan, Jack Chick was a genius. Did you ever see the takeoff Daniel Clowes did of a chick track?

      1. Can’t say that I have.

    2. http://www.theescapist.com/random020209.htm

      The 25th Anniversary interview with the people in the comic.

  14. For those interested in Canadian politics, there is a showdown brewing between the Conservatives and the son of Sauron himself, new Liberal leader Justin Trudeau.

    1. For those interested in Canadian politics…

      That’s a great set-up for a joke, but I don’t get your punchline.

      1. JJ! You’re back!

        1. Goddammit. I’ll have to try harder next time.

        2. He came back to neg me the other day. Or did you think he was here for you, honey?

          1. Of course he’s here for me, JJ and I have that special connection. Right, JJ? Right?!?

            1. No response in thirty minutes.


    2. Looking at that top pic I was wondering why a picture of him from a thirty year old high school yearbook was being used. Surely, there have been more recent citings. Then, it hit me, Canadians really do dress like they are livingin 1985, don’t they?

      1. Sightings not citings. Jeez, slowly becoming a total tard. Make that head diving there. Its this Nook HD I’m using until I get the broken ethernet board replaced. Its just seriously unfun to use this thing.

  15. Gwenneth Paltrow named sexiest woman by People Magazine, on a cover that has a picture of the way hotter Amanda Knox on the side. I would show you if the copy and paste and the tag editors on this device behaved with any kind of Goddamned consistency. I’d also link to week end at the beach pics of Vida Guerrs incredible, gravity defying ass (okay with big if it ain’t sloppy like a Kardasian’s).

  16. I was fairly certain our resident officer assured us that cops would back the local community against the feds, not call in the feds to rat out the local community.

    I posted this in the dedicated thread, but wanted to maximize the chances that he saw it and responds.

    1. Our resident cop ain’t really a cop.

    2. He’ll only respond by calling you a bigot.

      If his chickenshit ass responds at all.

  17. Stll smarting over voters’ decision to legalize the recreational use of marijuana in the state, Colorado cops threatened to call in the feds unless the legislature imposed tight restrictions.


    No way!

  18. LMAO:


    To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
    I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend’s purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
    First, I’d like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn’t expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head … isn’t it?!

    1. I know it probably wasn’t fun walking back to wherever you’d come from with crap in your pants. I’m sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

      After I called your mother or “Momma” as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you’d done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, — on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!
      I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go’s, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

      I then threw your wallet into the big pink “pimp mobile” that was parked at the curb ….. after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver’s side of the car.
      Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA’s office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.

      1. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
        ;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you … but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you’ve chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day!

        Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi

        1. If that is not real, it should be.

          1. Sadly, no. From Snopes aka buzzkilldotcom.

            1. Didn’t think so.

            2. I suspected as much, but it was still fucking hilarious.

          2. Stuff like that never is. Never.

        2. Well, funny, but if he did in fact do what he said, then he just confessed to armed robbery, plus the rest of the stuff. Not too smart.

          1. I don’t think any cops or prosecutors are going to give a shit, to be honest.

        3. It’s reasons like this that I don’t understand how people can be so gullible.

          I would love for this to be true, but it immediately struck me as false. How can people be so invested in a world view that they can’t tell when something like that is fake?

          This reminds me of when liberals started claiming that Scalia said black voting rights are a ‘privilege,’ which he clearly never said. The instant a left wing friend of mine told me that, I called bullshit because it was so obvious that a sitting Supreme Court Justice would never say that.

          1. Should have read deeper into the thread. For a site called Reason, there’s no delete key.

            1. Excellent! A reason to celebrate, and a requirement to drink – it’s like synchronicity!

    2. hahahahaha! Awesome!

    3. Guns only make a bad situation worse, I read that somewhere

  19. Somebody this morning was huffing and puffing about how outraged he was that the FBI did not instantly recognize the picture of one out of thousands of people who pass through their offices in the course of a year.

    1. I stand behind no one in my disdain for the Famous But Incompetents. But the idea that they should have known that this nut was going to blow a gasket as opposed to the thousands of other nuts they interview is just bunk.

    2. This is why I am not unduly worried about the feds vacu-sucking more and more formerly private info. Of course, I absolutely despise the invasion of privacy, but making the haystack bigger and bigger eventually makes finding the needle impossible.

  20. Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi


  21. Israel will soon be doing e-mail searches on foreign travelers visiting the country. You know those jokes you shared with your buddies? Yeah …

    Israel’s internal security agency has been authorised to demand “suspicious” foreign travellers open their personal email accounts for inspection on entry to the country.

    How does that even work?

    Israeli customs official: What’s your email address?

    Me: Uhm, Tuvalu19@hotmail.com

    Israeli customs official: Hmm, it appears you have an unusual number of incoming mail offering you penis enhancement and erectile dysfunction solutions…

    Me: Uh huh…

    Israeli customs official: You didn’t hand us a, how do you Americans say, Spam Trap?

    Me: Oh no, no way. That’s totally my email account.

  22. Joan Walsh: Rand Paul is a spineless joke.

    She’s trying to purge the cognitive dissonance his filibuster against drones had given her due to his recent flub on the issue.

    1. Nah, she’s just trying to sandbag someone who she perceives as a threat to TEAM BLUE. I doubt her partisan brain is capable of anything more.

    2. Oh, Joan Walsh. I didn’t think the guy who sang Rocky Mountain Way would have anything negative to say about Rand Paul.

    3. Joan is the one who spent endless column inches on the adventures of the Bush twins in the 00s only to later write in horror that anyone would ever violate the privacy of the Obama brats by reporting where they went on spring vacation.

      She admitted that she regretted writing about the Bush twins. I am sure you do Joan, now shut the fuck up you worthless hack.

    4. I guess they don’t understand the immenent threat vs kid peacefully driving a car down the road.

      An active shooter should be brought down by whatever means are necessary. Even if you have a drone that can take him out without further collateral damage.

      But if the shooter surrenders or escapes and is just walking around the street later, a drone strike or any targetted killing is unjustified.

      1. If they had had drones when Charles Whitman was blasting up the UT campus, drone striking him would have been justified.

        1. I think he damaged the transmission on a police helicopter, so its not like they didn’t try air strikes.

  23. He did not understand, after three years of negative margin, that increased sales resulted in increased losses.

    That is awesome. Is he available to replace Ben Bernanke?

    1. He’s dead, Jim.

    2. +1 destroyed economy

  24. the idea that they should have known that this nut was going to blow a gasket as opposed to the thousands of other nuts they interview is just bunk.

    That wasn’t even what the guy (Barnicle, on Morning Joke, probably) was pissed off about. He thought a picture of some Wop-looking guy in sunglasses and a baseball cap would actually be distinctly recognizable, and trigger the full complement of alarm bells. He must watch a lot of movies.

    1. Too much 24. Once we have a picture, we just feed it into the magic computer and it spits out the name.

      1. And CSI

        “We vacuumed all the stuff out of the victim’s carpets. Feed it through the computer, and the database gives us the exact location of the murderer. “

        1. CSI is a menace. It is tainting the entire American jury pool one episode at a time.

          1. “Where’s the forensics?”
            “This is an embezzlement case”
            “So, where’s the DNA showing he stole the money”
            “Sir, he used wire transfers and the Internet. There is no DNA. Just these receipts and spreadsheets.”

        2. I love all all the crime scene houses are super clean. If CSI came to my house, they’d still sifting through the vacuumed evidence 12 seasons later.

      2. “Enhance! Enhance!”

  25. Israel will soon be doing e-mail searches on foreign travelers visiting the country. You know those jokes you shared with your buddies? Yeah …

    Because obviously everyone has only one e-mail account and couldn’t just show them the harmless one while failing to mention the other one.

    Also, how’s this gonna work for business travelers? Given Israel’s history with regards to industriali espionage, I can’t imagine many companies are gonna be very keen on giving Shin Bet user credentials to their internal networks.

    1. Haven’t taken more than my phone out of the country in a while, but it seems like a good reason to wipe an ipad before travel, and then restore from iCloud backup on arrival. Similar things for other devices.

      I know us customs was searching some devices at the border, hard to imagine how much further they could go. If the accounts aren’t there, it’s pretty deniable.

  26. So I actually saw a “How Much Ya Bench” guy at the gym IRL this morning. I kinda thought he might be because in my 2 weeks at the new gym I’ve never seen him work his legs, but this was the first time he wore shorts.

    1. So how much did he bench?

      1. He was at 185 inclines on the Smith machine. Dude’s forearms were bigger than his calves. But its like he does all shoulders and chest. I think I’m going to hand him my copy of Starting Strength.

        1. The Smith machine is sort of a giveaway.

        2. 185 inclines


          Smith machine


          Keep your book and enjoy the look on his face when you’re benching twice that with a 2-second pause and a close grip. Fucking benchcurlbros.

      2. The same as your mom; 400 lbs.

      3. What do you care? I bet you don’t even lift, bro.

    1. How Much Ya Link bro?

      1. Fuck. Trying again?


        1. As a prior longtime owner of cats, that is one relaxed cat.

          Getting all three of those elements* with no obvious negative reaction from the cat is… amazing.

          *costume: Cats hate accoutrement attached to their bodies.
          Duckling: Every cat I’ve ever owned (except maybe one) would kill it (at maximum) or play-torture it to death at minimum.
          Riding a Rhoomba: Few cats like to be on anything that moves. Period.

          1. My actual favorite part is the dog in the hammerhead costume who looks ashamed to be a part of the family.

    2. This is even better than the puppies herding ducklings. Because ROOMBA!

      1. Puppies herding ducklings is like the singularity of cute. They ought to just use that Animal Planet Show Too cute in lieu of therapy. I don’t care how badly your dad molested you or how many people you saw get blown up in Iraq, watch Too Cute for a few hours and you will feel better about things.

      2. A guy at the bus stop told me about a guy whose dog shit on the floor and the roomba just smeared it over the entire floor.

        1. Yeah, well, you’re going to need SCOOBA for that. Roomba is the shit. Seriously. The. Fucking. Shit.

  27. I may not like the way Obama governs, but I’m totally stealing this parenting idea.

    “What we’ve said to the girls is, ‘If you guys ever decide you’re going to get a tattoo, then mommy and me will get the exact same tattoo, in the same place, and we’ll go on YouTube and show it off as a family tattoo,'” Obama said.

    1. It’s like we got each other’s backs!

    2. Why would you want your daughter’s name tattooed right over your ass?

    3. How dare his daughters attempt to express their individuality!

      What a piece of shit.

    4. They really don’t understand incentives. Obviously the incentive becomes, “If I want a tattoo, I should get something completely obscene in a completely obscene place, because not only will that make it more difficult for my parents to detect, it will also prevent or severely derail their punishment strategy.”

      1. My doctor buddy saw a lot of bad tattoos in his ER rotations. The best was a patient who came in with back pain. He took a look, only to find a tramp stamp that said FUCK ME HARD. That might be a clue, ma’am.

        1. Now that’s the kind of girl you want to have a random encounter with from an ad on craigslist!

        2. I know of a girl who has dotted line handprints on her ass right in the spot she most likes to be grapped while fucking.

          I have not seen them myself however. But I’ve got three independent sources. That means it can go in the newspaper right?

          1. Fuck, kiddo, what the hell is wrong with you? Start negging her immediately.

            1. One crazy girl in my life is enough. Besides…I’m kinda squeamish about being Eskimo bros with guys.

          2. Pics or it didn’t happen.

          3. Both of those are excellent ideas! And tell me more about this grapping of which you speak. I mean I’m now 100% up on fisting, so I want to make sure I know what else the kids are up to these days.

            1. grabbing*

              I have a weird form of dyslexia I think….plus I often use then when I should use than, and vice versa.

              1. No, grap is a perfectly good word. Don’t throw rocks at dat big ole retard boy no more, he liable to come grap you up.

            2. It sounds like grabbing one buttock while slapping the other.

        3. Anyway Warty hows yuh sex life?

          1. I feddup wid dis wourld!

            1. Ha, Ha. What a Story Warty.

    1. And he commanded the multitude to sit down on the grass, and took the five loaves, and the two fishes, and looking up to heaven, he spread them with artisnal mayo, and gave the loaves to his disciples, and the disciples to the multitude.

    2. I was a carpenter. I had a JOB for Pete’s sake. Everybody wore sandals, so you can’t blame me for that. I also didn’t choose to be a Nazarene, so I had to keep my hair long. Fucking foster parents.

      1. Jesus was Irish:
        1. He was Catholic
        2. He never held a steady job because he was too busy partying with his friends
        3. The last thing he said before he died was to ask for a drink

  28. This Jodi Arias is a piece of work.


    She stabbed her b/f 20 some odd times and is now claiming he called her a “3-hole whore” and watched kiddie porn. The dead fucker is being slandered in his own murder trial.

    1. Easy to do when someone can’t defend themselves. And you gotta go with something so vile, that people will think he, in some way, deserved it.

    2. She gives off all the psychopath vibes.

    3. “She stabbed her b/f 20 some odd times”

      So you’re saying she’s single?


    1. This is my favorite parody account because it doesn’t even try to sound like Tulpa.


  30. The French are rioting!

    Let’s hope this really kicks off. I want streets blockaded by overturned cars and parking metres uprooted and used as battering rams. GO UPPITY FRENCH GO!

    1. I believe ‘riot’ is French for ‘I love you.’

    2. See, they’re all sissy kickers. Sorry, that came out wrong. They all learned to fight from watching soccer. I think the sissies were winning as best I could tell.

      1. I’m just sad that y’all weren’t as excited as I was that the French are rioting right now. I want overturned Citro?ns barricading streets SO BADLY.

  31. A feminist guide to fisting.

    So you want to fist/get fisted by a feminist! Fantastic. First things first, have a conversation with the cutie(s) you want to fist/get fisted by.

    1. I’d rather be fisted by Wolverine.

    2. “Come on Homer, I’m insisting on a fisting.”

    3. First things first, have a conversation with the cutie(s) you want to fist/get fisted by.

      “Cutie”? Wow, way to go, feminist author. You have somehow simultaneously: reduced intercourse to a matter of physical attraction; infantilized the type of attractiveness a woman is capable of; and made me picture someone fisting you. Great combo.

      1. It’s obviously a really shit strategy for being completely gender/etc-neutral about who you’re fisting with. “Partner” is available and extremely appropriate for this situation…

    4. Executive Summary of A Feminist Guide to Fisting.

      Don’t use a man’s fist.

      BTW, Reasonable’s dictionary doesn’t recognize the word “fisting”. WTF?

  32. Survey! Who are your top three influences in libertarian thought (economics/politics/etc)? Authors preferred, but not necessary.

    For me, it’s likely Hayek, Mises, and Sowell. Not necessarily because they’re the best writers on the subject? Sowell can get pretty conservative at times? but the sheer volume and range of their writings has given me plenty to think about.

    1. James Madison, for his Constitution.

      1. The libertarian constitution that created a powerful central government where all executive power rests with one person? The one that allowed slavery, eminent domain, and searches without a warrant? That libertarian constitution?

    2. Warty, Episarch, and Tulpa.

      My therapist hates me.

      1. He said libertarian, not libertine.

      2. I’m trying to find a common thread linking Warty, Episiarch, and Tulpa. Other than commenting here, that is. Rape? Northeasternism?

        1. He’s just trying to explain why he’s so glib, greasy, and tiresome.

          1. I nominate “Glib, Greasy, Tiresome” as the H&R version of MFK. e.g. “Okay, Warty, Episarch, Tulpa: which one is glib, which one is greasy, and which one is tiresome?”

        2. Love, ProL. The common thread is love.

          1. “You’ll learn something about men and women. . .the way they’re supposed to be. Caring for each other, being happy with each other, being good to each other. That’s what we call love. You’ll like that a lot.”

      1. Soros

        You’re not even trying to troll us anymore. It’s like you’re a shallow parody of yourself.

        1. You are not aware of his initiatives to fight communism/socialism in Eastern Europe, fight for legal drugs, legal euthanasia. secularism, and Open Society self-rule.

          Yes, I know he hated Bush and you hold that against him. Just drop it before you look even more foolish.

        2. He’s just playing a little game – like “I Spy”, except this one is “Which One Does Not Belong”. Many 8-year olds are good at it.

      2. Soros? Can’t say I’m familiar with anything he’s contributed to libertarianism, aside from being a wealthy investor (good for him there, I suppose). Amazon shows a book on Globalization, but I expect any non-nativist/leftist to be reasonable on that subject.

        1. He gave millions of dollars to a gun control organization.


          1. The American Bar Association is a gun control organization?

            Sure they are. Nice try though.


            This wingnut site is all I found.

            1. Media Matters, the Brady organization, and the Center for American Progress. All of these receive Soros money. Tell me which of them is a libertarian organization.

              Soros isn’t even pro-free speech since he absurdly fell in line with the left-wing claim that Fox News’ ‘rhetoric’ is causing violence, completely without evidence.

              Tell me, which libertarian organizations is Soros funding to offset all the money he gives to progressives?

              1. The ABA is pretty far to the left. Definitely not remotely libertarian. Not even a little bit.

                1. They are not a gun control group.

              2. Matt Welch writes for Reason in support of Soros — https://reason.com/archives/200…..en-society

                1. Yep, look there! Ten years ago, Matt wrote that.
                  Wonder if his opinion has changed in ten years and Soros record since then?

                  1. I do recall Soros being pro-liberty in some of his dealings overseas years ago, but he’s a statist leftist in U.S. terms. There’s not really any rational argument otherwise. Unless he’s secretly funding attacks on the current occupant of the White House.

        2. On Sowell – “those who cannot do – teach”.

          Soros actually spends billions on capitalist and libertarian causes and has written 7-8 books on markets and self-determination.

          1. He gives millions of dollars to the Center for American Progress and Media Matters.

            Jesus Christ, the guy is so rich he could give money to actual libertarian groups or START HIS OWN and instead he funds the think tank that puts out Think Progress?

            Do even you buy the shit you’re peddling? Because the people he falls in bed with are doctrinaire progressives.

            Virtually all of the money he gives goes to Democrats, too. If he’s so libertarian, why does he support progressive Democrats instead of more libertarian Republicans like Paul or Amash? He could even support more libertarian Democratic candidates, and simply chooses not to.

            1. MM is just a media accuracy group. They point out the nonstop stream of lies from the wingnut media.

              Transparency is a libertarian and Open Society virtue.

              Get a grip, dude.

              1. MM is just a media accuracy group.

                A media accuracy group who only goes after one side, lies to help Democrats and actively promotes a progressive agenda. They’re a media accuracy group in the same way that the Media Research Center is a media accuracy group.

                Get a grip, dude.

                1. Get a grip, dude.

                  Seriously, he’s just mailing it in today.

    3. The Reagan of legend.

    4. Lao Tsu, Rand, and Konkin

      Eclectic, I know.

      1. Nice shout-out to Tsu. Rothbard wrote a good essay on Taoist Libertarianism

        1. Yeah. It’s a shame the Legalists won in China.

    5. A combination of anarchism, objectivism and reactionaryism: Rothbard/Hoppe, Rand and Houellebecq.

    6. WF Buckley, Frank Meyer, everyone else.

    7. Bastiat, Hazlitt, and Rothbard

  33. Mencken, Twain, and some other guy.

    1. The ‘writer’s’ picture is a fucking ferret with fake sunglasses.

      I’ve never hated anyone more.

      1. fucking ferret with fake sunglasses

        Man Franks Burns let himself go.

    2. “current public events”

      Eh….current maybe…but public…no. Sorry.

    3. I have no clue what “misogny” means.

    4. Image depicting rape and/or violence
      Death Threats

      How are any of these things misogynistic? If anything, given their rape obsession, I’d assume images depicting rape are SUPER FEMINIST.

      1. Especially cancer – does cancer hate women?

        1. Yeah, especially since, I, for one, have eaten more pussy than cervical cancer has.

  34. ‘If you guys ever decide you’re going to get a tattoo, then mommy and me will get the exact same tattoo, in the same place, and we’ll go on YouTube and show it off as a family tattoo,'” Obama said.

    Paging Mike Tyson!

    1. He’s a shit parent, too. You know what I told my kids about tattoos? “Fuck no. Not while you’re supported by me.” Yes, that goes even for the adult child.

      Gives them something to look forward to in their emancipation.

      1. You know I’ve never had a burning desire to get one. Then again, I wasn’t a very rebellious child. Probably because my parents kind of stopped enforcing rules after 14. The one time I actually got any kind of sit down after I entered high school was when my dad found empty beer cans in the back of my car.

        He walked in, tossed it on my sleeping face, and said “If you wreck that car, I ain’t buying you a new one.” I woke up and was like “I was ok to drive I swear.” He says “Probably were. But if you wreck that car, I ain’t getting you another one. You can go back to bikes and buses.”

        I never did wreck the car.

        1. We’re really big on the kids being responsible for themselves. We have one kid who was bombing in school, and we just told him he was screwing up his life. We didn’t hire tutors, buy him a car, or do whatever other dumb thing people do.

          I believe parents should be tyrants, so that kids appreciate their freedom later on.

          1. We have one kid who was bombing in school, and we just told him he was screwing up his life.

            So who got him to convert to Islam?

            1. Send him to the right madress and he will be valedictorian.

            2. Not yet. He’s doing better now, anyway.

              1. He’s lucky considering his father is a lawyer. By the way, what happens when a human mates with a lawyer? Is the offspring sterile?

                1. Woman goes in to see her doctor. She asks him “Doctor, my husband wants to try…you know…anal sex.” He says “Well make sure to clean well, and use protection.” She asks him “Why protection? I can’t get pregnant that way.” Doctor says “Sure you can, that’s where lawyers come from.”

                2. No kidding, one of the things I’ve made it clear I won’t fund besides tattoos, prostitutes, and piercings is. . .law school.

                  1. prostitutes

                    So suddenly you’re against procreation?

                    1. This is going to surprise you, but prostitutes actually go to great lengths not to get pregnant. Yeah, I know, what are the guys paying for then?

                    2. But they allow for practice, so that when you are with a regular partner you might not suck as bad, thus increasing your odds of multiple bonings.

                    3. Focus, Grasshopper, focus.

        2. The one time I actually got any kind of sit down after I entered high school was when my dad found empty beer cans in the back of my car.

          Because you didn’t share. No, my house was the same way. My mom had one rule about smoking weed in the house: you have to share.

      2. Exactly. Be whatever freak you want to be, just do it on your dime. With money comes strings and rules. Welcome to the real world.

        1. I’m not funding any of it, or buying them cars, or whatever other thing they whine about.

          1. Do they have to pay for their own restraints when you lock them in the closet at night?

            It’ll teach them to appreciate a dollar!

            1. What’s funny is that I’m not the hardass in the family. My wife is.

  35. Ev chistr ‘ta laou. Great Champions League game tonight.

    /no spoilers

    1. Damn Spoilers


    2. agreed

  36. Dear Alumni, Alumnae, and Friends,

    This evening at 6:00 p.m. ET, the Harvard Kennedy School’s Institute of Politics is sponsoring a Forum event titled “Boston Marathon Tragedy & Aftermath.”

    The panel discussion, which will feature experts from within and outside the University (see below), will be live streamed.
    I hope you can join us.

    Edward Davis
    Police Commissioner, Boston Police Department

    Juliette Kayyem
    Lecturer in Public Policy, Harvard Kennedy School
    National Security and Foreign Policy Columnist, Boston Globe
    Assistant Secretary for Intergovernmental Affairs, Department of Homeland Security (2009?2010)

    David N. Hempton
    Dean, Harvard Divinity School
    Alonzo L. McDonald Family Professor of Evangelical Theological Studies, John Lord O’Brian Professor of Divinity, Harvard University

    Kurt N. Schwartz
    Director, Massachusetts Emergency Management Agency
    Massachusetts Undersecretary for Homeland Security and Emergency Management

    David Wade
    Co-Anchor, WBZ-TV Morning News and WBZ-TV News at Noon
    Emmy-winning Broadcast Anchor

    David Ellwood
    Scott M. Black Professor of Political Economy
    Dean, Harvard Kennedy School

  37. What would you add to the bill of rights?

    “The right of the people not to bear arms shall not be infringed (i.e. no conscription. Requiring someone to bear arms, thus taking all of their freedom, is a far worse example of tyranny than preventing them from bearing arms.)”

    “If 1/3rd or more of the Supreme Court rule that a law is unconstitutional it shall be unconstitutional. (Greater protection of minority rights).”

    “Congress shall pass no law abridging the right of the people to encrypt their documents and effects. (Modern supplement to the fourth amendment.)”

    Those aren’t bad.

    1. “If 1/3rd or more of the Supreme Court rule that a law is unconstitutional it shall be unconstitutional. (Greater protection of minority rights).”

      Oh fuck yes. A world where 3 justices could strike down laws is a world that I want to live in.

      1. Eh, like all swords it is double edged.

        1. Eh, like all swords it is double edged.


        2. You’re offending the bladed-weapon geek in me, Virginian.

    2. How about one that just says, “BTdubs, we really fucking meant it about the 9th and 10th ones of these things”?

    3. Requiring someone to bear arms, thus taking all of their freedom, is a far worse example of tyranny than preventing them from bearing arms.

      That’s retarded.

      I mean conscription is bad, but disarming the population is worse. Besides, conscription should be against the 13th Amendment.

      1. Should be, but it isn’t. The courts ruled on that long ago.

        1. At various points, the courts also decided it is actually illegal to speak against the draft and that it’s okay to sterilize people if they’re of below average intelligence in order to create a more pure gene pool.

          BOTH those decisions were written by Oliver Wendell Holmes.

          Seriously, fuck Oliver Wendell Holmes.

          1. His father was a good dude. The son, not so much.

          2. They also decided it was chill to put Japanese people in concentration camps. So yeah.

          3. I think “Seriously, fuck Oliver Wendell Holmes” needs to be added to the Bill of Rights.

            1. This is an amendment that I can get behind.

    4. How about “The right of the people TO FUCK YOU OBAMA MOTHERFUCK HURRRRRR !#$%$#@”?

    5. Eh, I’d like to see better enforcement of the existing bill of rights. I mean, if you can screw up “Congress shall make no law […] abridging the freedom of speech,” what chance does everything else have?

    6. The rights of the people shall not be infringed.

    7. The government of the United States shall have no police power within the territory of any State.

      1. That would actually be a great idea – all the “national” police forces (FBI, DEA, etc) become solely invesitgative agencies with no power to arrest.

        All arrests have to be done by a state police force.

    8. No Fuck you, Cut spending.

  38. If the Kennedy School can’t explain the Boston Bombings, all hope for humanity is lost.

  39. Finally, someone got some service from a Walmart employee.

    QUEENSBURY — An employee of the Wal-Mart store on Quaker Ridge Road was arrested early Wednesday for allegedly engaging in prostitution in a store bathroom, according to State Police.

    Foster M. Bills, 22, of Stony Creek engaged in sex acts with other men for money in the bathroom of the store while working the overnight shift, officials said.

    Bills allegedly solicited meetings with would-be clients on the Craigslist online marketplace website, and arranged to meet them during his breaks.

    1. Huh. I didn’t know that Walmart was offering prostitution services on-site. They’re really trying to do everything, aren’t they?

      1. Gives new meaning to WalMart greeter.

        But seriously, everyone knows that WalMart creates the conditions that force people to solicit there.

        1. But seriously, everyone knows that WalMart creates the conditions that force people to solicit there.

          I was in Spain recently, and the thing about Spain is that nothing is ever open.

          My group was bitching about that and I joked that they needed a Wal-Mart where we were.

          A fairly level-headed seeming engineering student then said “Yeah, as if the economy here isn’t already bad enough!” non-ironically.


          1. Europe deserves every point of unemployment they get. Forever.

          2. I laughed at your engineer friend just now.

    1. There’s a lesson here somewhere, but I’m not sure what it is.

      1. You bet:
        “Officials say all 13 have been suspended without pay and the department is moving to fire them.”
        The lesson is to belong to the union. Fat chance they’ll be fired.

      2. There’s a lesson here somewhere, but I’m not sure what it is.

        That there’s a shit load of women working as prison guards and getting criminal justice degrees because dangerous men make them wet?

        1. I was thinking the exact same thing.

          You and I should probably not be in the same room together.

        2. Howls of “collectivist” incoming.

    2. Behold, the power of the Gibbs slap.

    3. Yeah the thing about the criminal justice system is that a lot of times the cops and other employees of the system come from the same streets as the criminals. So…not surprising at all.

    4. “Two of the women tattooed the inmate’s name on their bodies and he showered three of them with expensive gifts including cars and jewelry.”

      1. Pfft. Beta move. Should’ve bought them Skittles, then texted them the penis ASCII symbols.

      2. “It’s like we got each others backs.”

      3. I just want to know how a prison inmate was getting cars plural and jewelry in the first place.

    5. If you’ve ever been around prison guards, you’d know why this doesn’t happen more often. Any dude that will fuck prison guards will stick his dick in anything.

      1. Actually, there’s a cute chick I went to school with who’s a prison guard now.

  40. …”it very definitely breaks his promise”….
    Anyone who is just noticing this has to be a lefty, so there’s no real hope.

  41. Dude gets 10 years probation for rubbing his dick on other members of his HS basketball team.

    Seth Kellen, 19, was sentenced to 10 years of probation after he allegedly “penis slapped” his high school basketball teammates on the back, “digitally penetrated” another teammate and exposed himself to young boys in an elevator.

    The incidents happened when the Browerville High School basketball team was in Minneapolis, Minn., for a tournament.

    Dude was very busy that day.

    1. Dick slaps are illegal now? What is this country coming to…

    2. Opposing Views? Are we going to have a debate over the merits of dick-slapping now?

      1. NO, I think we’re all on the same page regarding the merits of dick slaps. It still probably shouldn’t be illegal though.

        1. Really? Why not?

    3. Lot’s of ‘Archer’ references today:

      Archer: I’d like to file an HR complaint against Conway.

      Pam: On what grounds?

      Archer: He touched my penis with his penis.

      Pam: Wow!

      Archer: Yep. He just walked up to me and went ::boop::

      Pam: Where?

      Archer: All of it, head and shaft.

  42. Does anyone else find it a little odd that federally subsidized student loans cannot be refinanced? I recently graduated and have been making my payments, but with my good job and decent credit I figure it should be relatively easy for me to refinance and get a better rate. I’ve called multiple banks/credit unions, and none of them refinance federal loans. Apparently it is not possible to do so.

    I understand why this is; the government is making good money on those of us who make our payments. I have a very low opinion of the government, but I’m somewhat surprised the thousands of 99%ers who bitch about their loans haven’t made a bigger deal about this. Well, I’m not actually surprised because they don’t understand finance or economics, but still.

    Am I off-base here? Can government loans be refinanced and I’m just missing something? Or is the government just unwilling to give up the only program making them money?

    1. Only if there were an (R) next to his name.

  43. Man Dies in Police Raid on Wrong House

    I’m at my wit’s end with this shit.

    1. “The Tennessee Bureau of Investigation is investigating. NAACP officials said they are monitoring the case. Adams was black. The two policemen are white.”

    2. Apparently this happened back in 2000. The end result was typical:

      The case of her husband went to court. A jury failed to find the officer in charge of the botched raid that killed him guilty of any wrongdoing. The city of Lebanon did pay the family a $400,000 civil settlement.

  44. lol, that dude jsut looks corrupt as the day is long


  45. despite what the article says, it is NOT Colorado cops that are threatening to call in the feds, etc. Reason CONSTANTLY munges the distinction between positions and actions of IACP and police chiefs in general and what REAL cops are doing/saying. It does cops a disservice. Police chiefs’ do NOT represent line cops. PERIOD

    AGAIN, reasonoids confuse copocrats with cops…

    “The Colorado Association of Chiefs of Police and the County Sheriffs of Colorado were so upset over the initial draft of House Bill 1317 that the groups were threatening to write a letter to Attorney General Eric Holder asking him to intervene ? the nuclear option.”

    Yet, the article title in the PM links made it sound like COPS were doing this.

    So, it’s not COPS that are trying throw a monkey wrench in legalized mj, it’s chiefs and sheriff’s iow management, NOT real cops.

    BUt reason says COPS are doing it.

    Over and over again, the IACP and police chiefs in general (who are political appointees) come down with positions that dont necessarily have any relation to the viewpoints of real cops. And they are not a proxy for same, despite the way reason presents these stories

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