Brickbat: Party Town

Charles Oliver | 2.15.2013 6:00 AM

(Kamtanoli375)

Religious police in Dhahran, Saudi Arabia, broke up a wedding party in a local mall and took the groom in for questioning. Officials told him such behavior was unacceptable.

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Fist of Etiquette 12 years ago

However, the celebrations drew the attention of members of the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice, the public morality police, who broke up the event and took the groom in for questioning.

Saudi Crockett and Tubbs on the job.
1. AlmightyJB 12 years ago
  
  That idea gives Bloomberg a woody.
PS 12 years ago

In a local mall! Inconceivable!
Counterfly Guard 12 years ago

What is Saudi now, some kind of Banana Republic? I know partying is a hot topic over there, but all the wedding guy was trying to do was pick up some American apparel. Then the fun police go all Au Bon Pain on his ass. I don't give a yankee candle what kind of punishment they'd give me, put those cops in the body shop.
1. Fist of Etiquette 12 years ago
  
  You make me sick. No Orange Julius reference?
  1. Counterfly Guard 12 years ago
    
    One time I was in an Orange Julius, and there was this old lady working there. She was like loading up one of the disgusting froth machines with whatever foul substance they run on. And she had this big clear plastic bag of probably 3-5 gallons of ochre sludge on her back and she was walking towards the machine from the back room.
    
    The bag starts slipping backwards and she reaches up to grab the other end, but this has some kind of fluid dynamic reaction. Her face starts a slow motion "oh shiiiiiitt....", and her reaching basically tips the bag more to the back, so the it falls on the floor and busts. She's off balance from losing the sack weight so immediately and she falls down too.
    
    I'm like waiting to pay a completely nonplussed younger worker at the cashier, and she's basically just blinking at me since her comrade fell. So I just left the fiver on the counter and walked out.
    
    I told this story one time to some friends while we were all drunk and they loffed and loffed and loffed.
    
    The end.
2. db 12 years ago
  
  My Auntie Ann experienced a situation just like this recently. She was alleged to have stolen a waldenbook and they had her in for questioning to find out if she was hiding a victoria's secret. Luckily for her, she took it to food court and was able to produce a receipt which she had saved n her foot locker. Thank god for our right to a jury of our pier ones!
db 12 years ago

Did they have a permit for this gathering? Were sugary sodas being served? Smoking in public? Did they not purchase enough carbon offset credits to cover the environmental cost of the DJ's sound equipment?
1. JeremyR 12 years ago
  
  Don't forget the bunny inspectors.
  
  http://bobmccarty.com/2011/05/.....magicians/
  
  Okay, probably not too likely , since magicians rarely appear at weddings, and there probably aren't many in Saudi Arabia (since magic is probably a no-no, too)
  1. LTC(ret) John 12 years ago
    
    If you had someone doing a magic trick, they get stoned to death for witchcraft/sorcery!
    1. Counterfly Guard 12 years ago
      
      It's Saudi, they don't do stoning.
      
      They'd just cut off his hat in the public square.
  2. AlmightyJB 12 years ago
    
    I've never heard of them going to Warty's house looking for hamster permits. Or John's house looking for pig permits. Also, is that the best picture Bob McCarty has of himself? He looks like a ghoul.
  3. SIV 12 years ago
    
    "I figure most people would just pick it up by the handle," Marty replied. It was at this point the inspector showed Marty the clause in her book that says verbal abuse of an inspector is a felony punishable by up to one year in prison.
    
    So is it a federal case because these small-time magicians ocasionally cross state-lines? COMMERZ CLAUSE!!1!
    
    Are there "dove police" and can no magician do the classic trick where you behead white and black doves and then "misinstall" the heads? I think changing public sentiments since the late 19th century may have reduced the popularity of that great effect.
2. JW 12 years ago
  
  The NYC Commission for the Promotion of Privation and the Prevention of Indulgence is taking notes.
  1. LTC(ret) John 12 years ago
    
    I'd laugh if that didn't cut so close to the truth.
3. AlmightyJB 12 years ago
  
  "There is no dignity in what you have done"
  
  To be fair the bride and groom were doing the retarted wedding couple "I like Big Butts" dance so they did have a point. THat's offensive in every country.
Fatty Bolger 12 years ago

Hey, did you see the article's picture? I could practically see an outline of the bride's face through her veil! What a slut!
1. JW 12 years ago
  
  I'll be in my hijab.
JW 12 years ago

Paul al Blart: Mall Scold.
JeremyR 12 years ago

Hmmm, much less amusing is this story listed as "Popular" on the linked story:

"Riyadh: A Saudi man working with the Commission for Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice recently killed his daughter for converting to Christianity.

According to sources close to the victim, the religious police member had cut the tongue of the girl and burned her to death following a heated debate on religion.

The death of the girl sent shockwaves and websites where the victim used to write with various nick names have allocated special space to mourn her, while some others closed temporarily in protest. "
1. db 12 years ago
  
  Sickening. This is "honor?"
  1. JW 12 years ago
    
    It will all be detailed in next month's Modern Arab magazine:
    
    -How to Tell if Your Daughter is a Whore
    -The Top 10 Signs That Your Neighbor is an Infdel
    -How to Reduce Your Swine Footprint
    -Stoning: This Year's Top Honor Killing Craze!
    -Top Celebrities Apostasies
2. RBS 12 years ago
  
  I'm sure the Jezzies will be all over this one.
Oso Politico 12 years ago

Dhahran is the closed community of Saudi Aramco, where I lived for 15 years. There is no mall and the religious police do not come in. The news article probably refers to the nearby town of Al Khobar.
1. CatoTheElder 12 years ago
  
  The mall is actually located in Khobar.
Lost_In_Translation 12 years ago

As a culture, SA is still trying to escape the dark ages. Iran is a paragon of modern civility in comparison.
1. AlmightyJB 12 years ago
  
  It's funny (or not) how they look at it exactly opposite. They're the civilized one's and we're the barbarians.
The Late P Brooks 12 years ago

I told this story one time to some friends while we were all drunk and they loffed and loffed and loffed.

The end.

NEEDZ MOAR FACE GNAWING

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Brickbat: Party Town

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