Don't You Dare Try to Feed the Homeless in Bloomy's NYC (Nanny of the Month, March 2012!)


This month Alabama lawmakers were itching to make it a criminal offense to annoy people online (isn't that what the interweb is all about?), and a national poll exposed the split personality of Americans who pretend to support individual responsibility, all the while cheering bans on smoking, transfats and the like.

But this month top dishonors go to the man who is perhaps the busiest busybody of them all, the big-city mayor who decided to halt private donations to his city's homeless shelters (after all, who can be sure that such donations wouldn't fill homeless people with fatty or salty food?!).

Presenting's Nanny of the Month for March 2012: New York City Mayor Meddlin' Mike Bloomberg!

Approximately 87 seconds.

"Nanny of the Month" is written and produced by Ted Balaker. Opening animation by Meredith Bragg.

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NEXT: Federal Judge Says Forcing Some Prostitutes to Register As Sex Offenders Violates the Equal Protection Clause

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  1. Everyone knows that starving homeless people are motivated homeless people.

  2. Mikey is literally mad with power. I wonder what he’s going to do when term three ends.

    1. probably challenge hillary in the 2016 primary

    2. Not good. Have you ever been made without power? Nobody listens to you.

      1. still my favorite scene of the movie.

    3. Literally mad like crazy or literally mad like angry? Because it would be pretty cool to see him Hulk out and run around the city smashing things he doesn’t like.

      1. It’s pretty cool to see anyone Hulk out, dude. Duh. But I meant “mad” as in…your mom.

        1. Oh yeah? Well, your mom is still getting dressed but she just told me to tell you to get off the computer because you’re still grounded.

      2. I would like for him to be mad with his power, as in upset with having power. And then smashing things he doesn’t like. It would be interesting.

    4. Well he used the financial crisis as reasoning to get the NYC mayoral term limit extended to three terms. You know, because NYC could not have survived without the strong leadership and vision of Bloomberg. Hell, without a third term, NYC would have been annexed by Hoboken, NJ.

      Bloomberg needs a new crisis to predicate extending term limits. Terrorists could fly a plane into a tall building? Been done. Terrorists could drive a van of explosives into a building? Done that.

      Maybe the next crisis could be a health crisis brought on by New York’s voracious consumption of low-fiber, high fat, high sodium foods? But wait. Bloomberg already solved that problem, by banning them. Hmmmm. I guess he’s out of luck.

  3. At the risk of annoying someone on the internet. Mayor Bloomberg needs a swift kick in the jimmy.

  4. The state does not like competition for saving the less fortunate.

    1. The state does not like competition for saving the less fortunate.

      There you go, buddy.

  5. Given that the food typically donated to homeless shelters is typically food that, while still perfectly edible, is considered to be unsalable (e.g. day-old baked goods, blemished fruits and vegetables, etc.) it is reasonable to predict that much of the food that was donated will now end up in garbage bins and dumpsters, being essentially worthless.

    As the video alluded, a decrease in food available in homeless shelters will likely lead to an increase in dumpster diving.

    These two facts, taken together, suggest that at least some homeless who were formerly eating the privately donated “unhealthy” food will continue to eat the exact same food, only now with the added benefit of having to retrieve it from piles of filth. Precisely how is that an improvement?

    1. Needs less typically, my apologies.

    2. Dude, Bloomberg is all about environmentalism. He’s just prompting the homeless to become Freegans.

  6. C’mon cut Bloomie some slack. After he fixed the schools, elimiated corruption, rebuilt the crumbling infrastructure, re-organized city finances to be solvent in perpetuity, and gave everyone a pony, he had to do soemthing else…so why not starve the homeless so they won’t dirty his bright shining city on the hill?

  7. I’ve always been a firm believer in peaceful government reforms but then I see out of control assholes like Bloomberg and my inner child revolutionary starts to whisper that motherfuckers like that can only be properly dealt with via blood in the streets.

    My inner child may be a result of my Irish blood boiling over because my ancestors came to America to escape oppression or perhaps it my French heritage screaming that a guillotine is the only way to deal with the political class. Then again, my rage could all be just that my German ancestry likes to raze civilizations for sport.

    In any case, I used to be a “good” person but tyrants like Bloomberg are pushing me more and more into the realm of “fuck ’em all, we’ll figure out who’s right and who’s wrong when it’s time for the revolution to start burying the bodies!”

    I hate ALL the political elite because I didn’t used to be like this!

    1. Irish, French, AND German heritage? How can you accomplish any revolution with all the drinking your genes demand?

      1. I’m also a sailor, so add that to on top of the hat trick.

    2. …raze civilizations for sport…

      I’m stealing this.

  8. What “homeless?” I thought all homelessness ended when Hopey McChange ascended to the presidency.

  9. But can’t they just gambol for their food? They should be happy as clams!

  10. Nanny of the month? Are you joking? Isn’t Bloomy the nanny of our generation? The guy is a fucking control-freak loony. Nanny of the month — pish.

    1. Yeah, I thought he was disqualified because if they let him in the race he’d win EVERY month.


    Oh, wait… Bloomberg is one of us.

  12. Better dead than Red

  13. Another Laputian Solution!

  14. Pretty sad society we live in now isnt it?

  15. buddy’s mom made $19011 a month ago. she is making an income on the computer and bought a $529600 condo. All she did was get lucky and put in action the information shown on this web site NuttyrichDOTcom

  16. I seem to recall an ancient proverb about poking a sleeping bear that fits our current times very well. The Libs have been poking us for 40 years. Libs are soon going to realize the same fate as
    Tim (not so) Treadwell, Grizzly Man. What do you think the last thought that went through his head was? (just before the teeth)

    But but youre my teddy bear…

  17. First they came for my transfats, and I said nothing.
    Then they came for my salt, and still I said nothing.
    Then they came for my sugar, and yet I still said nothing.
    Then they came for my red meat, bacon, eggs and dairy, but I couldn’t say anything because I was starving and too busy eating my soy based, fair trade, sustainably raised, Vegan cake to say anything at all.

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