Newt Gingrich's Florida Poll Numbers Sagging, Five More Eurozone Countries Downgraded, Facebook to Go Public, Iran Threatens its Own Oil Embargo: P.M. Links

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NEXT: Ron Paul Roundup: Campaign in Maine, Praise By Palin; Winning the Younger (Jack) Welchs and Blackedout Again

Lucy Steigerwald is a contributing editor at Antiwar.com and previously worked as an associate editor at Reason.

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  1. Lady Steigerwald steps up to the plate.

    1. John

      Lucy is awesome

      1. Lucy Steigerwald

        Thanks, friends.

        1. Gojira

          You’re young and female. You’d have to do something pretty fucked up to lose this crowd.

          1. Lucy Steigerwald

            Mean old man.

            1. Episiarch

              Jim’s a dude?!?

              1. Gojira

                My secret’s out!

                1. Episiarch

                  You know, you think you know someone…

              2. Warty

                Well, he was, back before the incident with the bear trap. Cut him some slack.

                Actually, no. Fuck Jimbo.

                1. Episiarch

                  And all that foreplay we did in our emails to each other…useless.

                  Thanks for wasting my time, Jimbo.

                  1. Warty

                    Email??? HOW DO I GETZ ON THE EMAIL LIST?????!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?

                    1. Gojira

                      You have to be a flaming homosexual, like Epi and myself and [possibly] John and MNG.

                    2. Episiarch

                      Flaming?!?

                    3. Gojira

                      Yeah you know, like Johnny Storm.

                      I tape my shit back, put on a dress and a Carmen Miranda hat, and yell, “FLAME ON!”

                    4. Troy

                      Dunphy and Sarcasmic are secret lovers.

          2. Megan McArdle is a female, and I hate that bitch.

            1. Lucy Steigerwald

              Definitely going to start being less nice to you people.

              1. Gojira

                Your first mistake was ever being nice to us to begin with.

              2. Aresen

                Actually, carry a glock and wear full body armor whenever one of them is in 1000 yards.

              3. Warty

                Her first mistake was mistaking us for people, Jimbo. You moron.

                1. Episiarch

                  Jimbo’s been pretty stupid today, hasn’t he. Well, stupider than usual, anyway.

                2. Gojira

                  Quite right. Everyone knows that we are, in fact, Klingon exiles.

                  Qa’pla!

              4. Definitely going to start being less nice to you people.

                Just remember to leave me out of any restraining order (PFA to yinzers). All I did was note you were working the links tonight.

            2. I’m sure Megan McArdle hates you too, Fluffy. :-p

              1. I hope so. I’d hate to have to e-twit her flaming poop or whatever it is the kids do these days.

                1. Ch@er

                  This is like the worst chat room ever.

          3. yonemoto

            KMW did it, so, it’s not impossible.

        2. Binky

          Lucy, would you, um, ever, you know, consider … elective office?

          I hope not.

        3. yonemoto

          big fan of the bulleted list. Very competitive with Tim’s bolded links.

    2. lily

      hi beauty,
      Are you a bicurious having trouble finding honest and safe places to have bisexual chat ? Well you’ve come to the right place—datebi*cO’m—. Just join in for free!

  2. Mitt Romney

    Second! But First in Florida!

  3. db

    “Newkular Titties Sagging.”

    Say it ain’t so!

    1. Aapologies 2HD

      Don’t say it! Sing it!

      1. EDGreppin' LBC

        Fuck yeah! That’s it, I’m officially starting my weekend. Drink!

        Ironically, Bob Mould and Grant Hart are gay. Greg Norton with the rough trade mustache is straight and happily married. It’s a crazy world.

  4. DENVER — The 10th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled Friday that a federal law making it illegal to lie about being a war hero is constitutional and making false statements is not always protected free speech.

    But talking smack about a HALO opponent is still kosher, right?

  5. Ben Bernanke

    Nooo! Not SLOVENIA!!

  6. John

    How stupid was Jon Corzine to steal all of that money and buy eurobonds with it? That has to be the most retarded crime in history.

    1. Sevo

      So he robbed a bank and took the deposit slips?

    2. Jeffersonian

      Hookers, blow and fast cars I could understand.

  7. Episiarch

    Newt is a jerk?

    1. JW

      I’m including this only because it shows off Bernadette Peter’s tits nicely.

      1. Episiarch

        “Oh, this is the best pizza in a cup ever. This guy is unbelievable. He ran the old Cup ‘o Pizza guy out of business. People come from all over to eat this.”

        1. Pro Libertate

          “Good Lord, I’ve heard about this–cat juggling! Stop! Stop! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Good Father, could there be a God that would let this happen?”

          1. Ice Nine

            Umm, please, do not write “cat” here.

        2. sage

          If its in a small cup is that considered thin crust?

          1. Pro Libertate

            Sounds like some spam to me.

          2. Episiarch

            You trying to cause a problem, sage? Create a disruption? Well, though a deep dish scumbag like ProL might fall for that, I won’t.

            1. Pro Libertate

              Really, from a topological perspective, debates about thin vs. deep-dish are meaningless when pizza-in-a-cup is at issue.

              1. Episiarch

                Actually, ProL, it’s very relevant. See, the issue at hand is actually an issue of dimensions.

                The theoretical perfect pizza is actually the impossible: a two-dimensional pizza, which has no thickness at all. This is known as the Principle of Attenuation. So the best pizzas attempt to keep their z-axis as small as possible to attempt to approach the unattainable perfection.

                Deep dish pizza violates this striving for perfection by its very existence, and its striving for the opposite: thickness; three dimensions; a high z axis. This denial of the perfection of two dimensions is what makes deep dish so repulsive.

                Cup o’ Pizza takes this further by actually having a z axis greater than its diameter. Now, you would think that this gross violation of the Principle of Attenuation, but by going beyond all conceivable limits of z axis size, it breaks through the worst possible z axis (one identical to its diameter) and starts to become tasty again, the taller it becomes. Therefore, very tall cups of pizza are pretty good.

                I hope you can comprehend this with that tiny lizard brain of yours.

                1. Warty

                  You told me there would be no math, you fuck.

                  1. Gojira

                    Brace yourself Warty, but the cake was also a lie.

                    1. Warty

                      “Unbelievable. You, [subject name here], must be the pride of [subject hometown here]!”

                2. JW

                  You fucking doofus. Heisenberg’s Pepperoni Principle proved your precious theory utterly wrong. Anything above the Schwarzchild height quickly collapses into a naked sausagallity. Clearly you have never taken the mass of the extra cheese into consideration.

                  I give you an A minus MINUS.

                  1. sage

                    My work is done here.

                  2. Episiarch

                    That’s the lowest grade possible!

                    You fucking chimp. The entire point of the cup is as a structural assistance to the crust to enable rising above the Schwarzchild height through the creation of the cheese meniscus. This is basic Pizzology, dumbass. Why don’t you go back to your tractor pull and let a Pizzology PhD such as myself do the math and make more money than you.

                    I knew I should have checked your showboating Globetrotter algebra.

                    1. JW

                      Oh, it’s the magic cup! It all works out so beautifully when you have 10 extra dimensions and a sturdy cup!

                      Phbbbbt. I don’t know why anyone takes any of you String Cheese theorists seriously.

                    2. sage

                      NOW my work is done here.

                    3. Episiarch

                      All serious Pizzologists agree on the String Cheese Theory. There’s a consensus, you…you…String Cheese denier.

                    4. JW

                      Pizzologists. Hah! You and your multi-topping theories. The black olives and onions just pop forth out of the sauce’s membrane! Like *that*! Ludicrous!

                      Your sad devotion to that ancient religion has not helped you conjure up the grand unified delivery or given you clairvoyance enough to find the missing pizza boxes.

                    5. Episiarch

                      How dare you lump me in with the Toppingers, you shitheel! I am a New Traditionalist, and call for only garlic and basil as toppings. You’re probably a vile Proteinator and call for only meat toppings. You disgust me!

                    6. JW

                      You’re beginning to sound like one of those Stuffedtologists or the insufferable Pizzahutarians with all of your obfuscation and mathematical sleigh-of-crust. Next, you be telling us that the thermodynamic properties of the creamy garlic sauce refute the central thesis of Herman Cain’s General Theory of Stromboli.

                      Tart up your theories all you like, but you’ll never be able to escape your Dominosite past.

                    7. Spoonman.

                      Look, if you just construct the fundamental equations in spherical coordinates you’ll see the intellectual and, frankly, moral bankruptcy of New Traditionalism.

                    8. The Totino Theorem

                      The best pizza comes in roll form

                3. Pro Libertate

                  See, your dastardly plan of a two-dimensional pizza is at last revealed.

            2. Colonel_Angus

              “Therefore, very tall cups of pizza are pretty good.”

              Deep pot pizza proves this wrong. It would just be a deeper version of barf casserole.

              1. Pro Libertate

                What happens if I stack an infinite number of two-dimensional pizzas?

                1. JW

                  Nothing, other than you getting very tired. Something like that only exists theoretically using Unoion geometry from the Chicago School.

                  1. sage

                    How about now?

                    1. A Secret Band of Robbers

                      PIZZA CUBE

                    2. JW

                      It will NEVER be done.

                    3. Pro Libertate

                      What happens if I throw a two-dimensional pizza at Episiarch?

  8. But Tyler’s especially not a fan of Gingrich, who he dubbed a “big jerk.”

    “He needs to stick with the same wife, that’s what my mother taught me,” Tyler said. “But that doesn’t seem to happen much today.”

    I hope infidelity isn’t Tyler’s sole problem with Gingrich, or I’ll have to rethink who my favorite president is.

    1. Lucy Steigerwald

      Did you read “Recarving Rushmore” too?

      (Okay, I actually just meant to read it for like the past five years…)

      1. RoboCain

        “Team Sandtastic of Sarasota, Florida built the 1,175,100-pound (525 tons) sand castle which donned the faces of the four remaining candidates for the Republican party’s nomination, Newt Gingrich, Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum and Ron Paul, and the two candidates who suspended their campaigns in South Carolina, Rick Perry and John Huntsman.”

        http://moonbattery.com/?p=7252

    2. Episiarch

      I thought your favorite president was President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho.

    3. John

      Really your favorite President should be W.H. Harrison. How could a guy who died shortly after entering office not make the top ten?

    4. The Ghost of Franklin Pierce

      What am I, chopped liver?

    5. rts

      I find it interesting that there are people alive today whose grandparents were born in the 18th century.

      Both my grandmothers are in their mid-90s and their grandparents were born in the mid-19th century.

      1. Pounce deLeon

        TA-65, biotches!

      2. Ice Nine

        That’s some serious telomerage.

      3. Colonel_Angus

        Its what happens when a very old guy keeps banging young chicks. Your great grand children can easily have a one hundred year age difference that way.

    6. Pro Libertate

      I love love love that Tyler has two grandchildren among the living. Just awesome.

      1. Anacreon

        Agreed, it is amazing, who even thought it was possible? Almost more amazing is how all the commenters on Politco say they don’t care about this “meaningless” person, they don’t want to hear what he has to say, to them it is just some excuse to do a hit piece on Gingrich.

        1. Pro Libertate

          But it’s so cool! Being that close in the ancestry tree means that Tyler could have had influence on this person, even if just through dear old Dad.

  9. Aresen

    Ron Paul challenged Rick Santorum, Mitt Romney, and Gingrich to “a 25-mile bike ride…in the heat of Texas” during last night’s debate.

    Piffle.

    I want a duel, with sabres, mounted & no shield larger than a cubit in any direction.

    1. Binky

      Piffle.

      Bike race, with head-starts proportional to ratings in the polls.

      1. Aresen

        Newt would be in the ambulance after 10 minutes either way.

        1. cynical

          Don’t be so sure. The slitheen are much stronger, faster, and fitter than they look.

    2. JW

      Mercy is the mark of a Great Man

      1. Episiarch

        Such a great episode.

      2. Pro Libertate

        “Well, I’m all right.”

        We need to find alternative universes to trade with, simply so I can buy seasons 2-9 of Firefly.

        1. JW

          Is that the one where Fox executives are paper mache puppet artists?

        2. yonemoto

          Joss whedon shows past season three are never any good. Don’t bother trying to open that wormhole, you’ll only be sorely disappointed for a whole lot of effort.

          1. db

            I disagree. The later Buffy season (6?) where Willow was battling magic addiction and Buffy was fucking the hell out of Spike had some great moments.

        3. Tulpa

          The comic books for the “lost episodes” blew chunks. A couple of the later episodes are pretty mediocre as well.

      3. Brett L

        Fillion looks so skinny here after seeing him in Castle.

      4. Francisco d Anconia

        Shiny!

    3. Ice Nine

      That was a funny bit. Really cracked Wolf Blitzer up, too; dude has the sense of humor of a banana slug.

      1. wareagle

        give Wolf some credit, though. He did not let Noot off the hook re: snide remarks “on another program” about Mitt’s foreign accounts.

    4. The candidates cry, “Ki-yip-pee-yi,”
      deep in the heat of Texas,
      The fundies bawl, and bawl and bawl,
      deep in the heat of Texas.

      1. Brett L

        I have to admit, I clapped at the end of the verse. I was conditioned at an early age.

    5. That would be a pretty big shield.

  10. HTS

    HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVINIEN

    THE CULT OF CATS [PART TWO]

    THE CULT OF CATS ? Contribution and Tax Exemption Status Re-think

    OUTSIDE PEST VS INSIDE PETS

    The Cult of Cats the [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society, do not understand the concept of property rights, business concerns and rights, the protection of endangered species, or floral and fauna, these organizations once again place the sub-species of [CATS] above the human species, they are unable to differentiate between a [CAT] as an Outside Pest an undomesticated wild sub-species, and that of an Inside [Cat] as a Pet a domesticated wild sub-species, or a Pet that when in an outside environment as a dog is by its master, must be under the direct control of its master, a cat is a sub-species to that of the human species it is a the human is the master and the cat is the sub-species, the cat does not control the human the human must be its master and in total control of that sub-species. Thus it flies in the face of common sense with an a entire Pet and Pet Supply Industry devoted to the care and maintenance of any and all pet sub-species, that this concept eludes that of the The Cult of Cats the [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society. If the [CAT] sub-species is not under the control of dominate Human Master Species in an outside environment it is no longer a pet but a pest and must be seen for what it is a sub-species pest, and The Republic of California, the County of San Diego, has [1/2M] One ? Half Million such pests under the protection of the The Cult of Cats the [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society, the American ? Israeli Military Industrial Complex ? [The Empire], it is time to change things.

    THE CULT OF CATS – The ASPCA – Humane Society ? Feral Cat Society

    It has come time for a re-thinking of the continued tax exemption status of the [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society in view of their anti-business, anti-community, anti-environmental, and anti-national security positions in their support of the rights of Cats. These organizations place the rights of Cats totally and completely above the Rights of the Human Species; it is one matter to have concerns about the treatment of a species but yet another to place that species [Cats] above and beyond other more pressing issues. Business and Property owners have the right to the control of their property rights and legal business interests, Hotel, Motel, and other business concerns have the right to take whatever actions they feel necessary to protect not only their property but their guests, and clients from pests [Cats], and this right extends to that of home owners, and renters upon rental property. But the Cult of Cats the [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society, have established a policy of a confrontational and combative nature it is not the Cat pest problem but the business or the individual who is at fault. The Cult of Cats does not approach the matter as one in which the problem is the Cat Pest Problem, that needs to be dealt with and resolved but that the business or individual property owner, or renter must be educated to the Rights of Cats, to free unrestricted, and unmolested access at all times and that if cats have established a residence upon that business, private property, or rental property that business, private property owner, or rental property resident is totally and completely responsible for the welfare of the Pest Cats. These organizations are not about Animal Control but Animal Right above and beyond Mankind and the interest of the Human Species.

    CONTRIBUTION AND TAX EXEMPTION RE-THINK

    It has come time for to re-think the tax exemption status of the Cult of Cats the [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society, and contributions make by individuals as a tax exemption, as these organizations no longer serve the public or its interests, but that of Rights of select species above all other interests both public and private, that individual contributors may indeed continue their donations to these organizations if they so desire but without a tax exemption, but it would be far better if their contributions were directed to the interest that would far better sever the interest of Mankind, and these include [UNICEF], Doctors without boarders, the Cancer Society, the AIDS Foundation. The American ? Israeli Military Industrial Complex [The Empire], has [100K] One ? Hundred Thousand Veterans of their Wars of Economic Stimulus, spread across the length and breath of its vast territory may suffering from [PTSD] Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, formally know as Shell Shock, one community within its vastness only provides a week of help to these individuals, The Republic of California, County of San Diego, and no other, and there is the hope of a vast return to be make by such contributions, which do not contribution to the destruction of private and business interests, the destruction of the environment and the placement of a sub-species interests above that of the human condition, and interest, the Cult of Cats the [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society, and contribution are once again upon a contribution drive, it is suggested at after viewing their presentations, view those of children around the globe and within the local community, who are not Pets, but are part of the Human Species, and re-think which will bring the greater return on the investment of contribution dollars, will a [CAT] pest bring about world peace, create a method of feeding the entire worlds growing population, be an artist whose plight needs the greater response, which species, in it is time for a CULT OF CATS ? Contribution and Tax Exemption Status Re-think

    HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVINIEN

    1. rts

      The fuck?

      1. Binky

        You must be new here.

        1. rts

          Oh, I’m familiar with Herc… he even replied to me once!

          It’s just that ranting on the tax exempt status of the SPCA is out of his usual purview.

          At least he managed to work in a reference to the American-Israeli military industrial complex. That’s how you know it’s a genuine Herc rant.

          1. Binky

            Sorry, didn’t recognize you.

            I’m thinking this rant is rather more symbolic than usual.

          2. Worse, he’s not using [ALL CAPS] for everything in [BRACKETS] anymore. I hope the [EMPIRE] didn’t get to him.

          3. Gojira

            That’s how you know it’s a genuine Herc rant.

            Look for the Seal of Approval, and use only Genuine HTS Rants in your message boards!

      2. Without part one, I’m lost.

        1. Doktor Kapitalism

          It was in a thread earlier today.

    2. JW

      “Good Lord – I’ve heard about this – cat juggling! Stop! Stop! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Good. Father, could there be a God that would let this happen?”

    3. Aresen

      Would you please get off the Ward Attendant’s computer?

    4. db

      Sheer beauty. The cat on my lap is looking at me very suspiciously now.

      1. Fritz the Cat

        Puppy dog faces are so phony.

    5. Pro Libertate

      Herc, I am loving this new cat thing. More! More!

    6. Warty

      Iz u a bed?

      1. Brett L

        If it stays, I layz is pretty much my cat’s motto.

    7. Bra fucking vo, man.

      That is truly some epic shit right there.

    8. Cytotoxic

      All of these need to be archived. They are all beautiful.

  11. Killazontherun

    Apparently, Demi Moore was hospitalized after ODing salvia (TMZ is reporting whippets but that doesn’t sound right).

    http://www.wwtdd.com/2012/01/d…..something/

    To quote the 9-1-1 caller, ‘She smoked something. It’s not marijuana?It’s similar to incense. She seems to be having convulsions’. She also said Demi, ‘has been having some issues lately.’

    She sounds like a deadpool wanna be at this point. Since whacking off to nudies of dead people creeps me out (Dana Plato, I hardly knew yee!), I’m going to have to give the sexiest nude pic that ever came out of Hollywood http://photos1.blogger.com/blo…../1600/demi bush.jpg

    a few go arounds before it is too late!

    Damn straight it is not safe for work! Though, you’d have better luck trying to make out the shape of a vagina from a pair of jeans.

    You’ll have to lift the link manually. Squirrels can’t handle the spacing mark code.

    1. Binky

      The fuck?

    2. RoboCain

      Lots of things are smokable…

    3. Jerry

      Perhaps she finally thought about shaving that bush and afterwards misplaced it with her dope.

    4. killazontherun

      The great thing about fucking Demi at the age of nineteen is that if you get her wet in the shower she looks, er, thirty?

      How is there enough days in the life of a nineteen year old to grow a bush like that?!?

      1. Pounce deLeon

        TA-65, biotches!

    5. RoboCain

      http://photos1.blogger.com/pho…../1600/demi bush.jpg

      1. RoboCain

        Apparently, adding a ” ” doesn’t work either.

        http://tinyurl.com/nrhekd

    6. http://photos1.blogger.com/blo…..20bush.jpg

      ur welcum

    7. There is no way that’s real. That’s somebody playing a joke, long ago.

      She’s hot and all, but if I saw that I would run for the hills and never go back. I might even go gay.

      1. Capitalisms

        Divorce courts don’t accept Moore’s bush as a reason. Think of a better excuse.

    8. Colonel_Angus

      That’s vintage old growth.

  12. RoboCain

    “A traffic officer, who was fired after he was caught appearing in a porn film while in uniform and on duty, has admitted he made a mistake and begged for his job back.”

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..iform.html

    1. Ice Nine

      Forget about it. What’s the guy think, he only beat the shit out of a crippled schizophrenic or something?

    2. sage

      The fuck?

    3. Pro Libertate

      Mistake? His mistake was not getting the union to back him up!

    4. Coeus

      Goddammit that pisses me off. Not what he did (he was ambushed by a hot naked chick, I don’t blame him a bit), but that this got him fired. All the bullshit that the LA cops pull, and this gets someone fired. He should have pepper sprayed her and beat her with a baton. They’d have given him a citation for that.

  13. El Commentariosa

    This is a thing?

    1. John

      And if it is, how did the chick with the antlers at the Royal Wedding not win it?

      1. Brett L

        I think they’re serious about there being some sort of fashion besides “bizarre” to ladies’ hats.

    2. Binky

      Nope. Otherwise she’d be “hatted”.

      1. WarrenT

        Hatters gonna hat.

  14. The 10th Circuit Court of Appeals confirms law that says lying about being a war hero is not protected speech.

    This is a travesty. I fought in ‘Nam to preserve freedom of speech.

    1. Herb Aceous

      Winnah!

    2. Episiarch

      “I don’t condone what Dr Zoidberg did, but I’ll fight tooth and nail for his freedom to do it. Or I would if I hadn’t lost my teeth and nails on Mars and Saturn respectively.”

  15. RoboCain

    We don’t know anything, so he must be guilty

    http://jezebel.com/5879867/yal…..story-ever

    1. Brett L

      The assault was so serious that neither the police nor University officials were involved. We know that.

    2. Josef K.

      Story of my life.

  16. RoboCain

    TEH NOOZLUDDERS!!

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..stpolitics

    1. Anonymous Coward

      Wow, if a secretary said it, it must be true!

      I’d wipe my ass with the Washington Post if I cared to buy a copy.

      1. I bet my secretary (OK, receptionist) probably would tell you (if asked) that I never, ever watched porn in the office.

    2. Coeus

      In the Jezebel writeup, they say:

      to full on cuckoo bananas? “MLK was a flagrant plagiarist with a phony doctorate”

      Damn, how long does it take to check wikipedia? Are these bitches even trying?

  17. HTS

    [FIST OF ETIQUETTE SAYS]: Without part one, I’m lost.

    [TRIATHLON REPLYS]:

    THE CULT OF CATS ? The ASPCA – Humane Society ? Feral Cat Society

    The Cult of Cats

    Now, cults and the deification of animals as Gods is nothing new and in fact pre-dates the dawn of history what has really taken our interest is that in a modern so called society the American ? Israeli Military Industrial Complex ? [THE EMPIRE] that such a cult would have gained such a huge foothold politically, and economically in such a so called advanced society but this is in fact what has happened, the rights of cats supersede that of all members of this society. The [ASPCA] The American Society for the Protection of Cruelty against Animals ? The Humane Society ? and Feral Cat Society have established such a Cult of Cats they even have [TV] Television Show broadcast [Animal Cops], across the entire national media, showing the legitimate power they and their members ship exercises, and make no mistake the power they bring to bear is scary to say the least, one can only read their websites and a chill runs down your back. These organizations have taken their Cult Religion and the Worship of Cats to the point that the natural balance, economy and the national security of its own national [EMPIRE] are at risk.

    The Natural Balance, Economy

    The Cult of Cats in The Republic of California, the County of San Diego, has destroyed the natural balance of nature, with a [1/2M] One-Half Million population of unchecked Cat population over running and destroying natures balance, endangered species, and the flora and fauna, of that community, the economy is suffering under the unchecked control of the Cat population caused by the Cult of Cats, land owners, home owners, hotel owners all suffer under the thug enforcement by the Cult of Cats and its Animal Cops, in San Diego County a hotel was put under the gun by the Cult of Cats for steps it may or may not have been taking to end the Cat Scourge, to its economic interests, may humans suffer allergic reactions to cats which effected the hotels occupancy rates, and therefore its economic bottom line, and that of the tourist industry as a whole. In one community in that County of the Republic of California a landowners property is over run with cats, one elderly woman in her eighties came out of her abode tripped over a cat not hers, fell and broke her hip, which resulted in a hip replacement and many months of suffering and pain, another elderly woman with terminal cancer requested the member of that communities Cat Cult to please help by not allowing their cats to urinate relieve themselves around her loggings, do the adverse effects caused to her in her last days upon her returning home after radiation and chemo therapy treatments which were causing her to vomit under normal circumstances alone but the cats only increased her distress, but was meet with a letter of threat letter being placed in her mail, combined with threatening phone calls, to the point were she finally left the community to end her days in a less hostile environment. The landowner himself a financial supporter of the Cult of Cats himself has made numerous to come to some sort of rapprochement, as his property also runs along side of a school and one of his residents grandson came down with Ringworm a disease which can only be treated but never cured was only separated from the school by a chain link fence, only to be rebuffed, and has come to the point were he prays that cats can be found with distemper within his community which would force a removal of all cats from his business and property.

    The [EMPIRE’S] National Security Threat

    Now, the Cult of Cats, has created a valid National Security Threat to its own [EMPIRE], in that cats are the perfect biological agent median, they are protected by the Cult of Cats to the point there are no limits to the access that cats have to any and all areas within Republic of California, the County of San Diego, a major Military Complex of the Military Industrial Complex of the [EMPIRE]. We know that biological warfare agents can be transferred between species, as can be proven by the transfer of Syphilis from a monkey species of South America to the Spanish population of Europe, the Black Plague from rats to same population, and the modern day transfer of Ebola to various African Tribes, and cats transfer as has been previously stated Ring Worm, and beyond that cat scratch fever, rabbis, and the list goes on. But what [IF] these diseases were made into Super Strains or even better Super Strains of Biological Agents of other types transferable to the human population of the San Diego County Military Industrial Complex, which would spread across the entire [EMPIRE] not only unchecked by even aided by the Cat Cult of the [EMPIRE]. Cats prove the perfect agent for the introduction of such a Biological Warfare Agent, think about it a huge protected unchecked population, the perfect stealth fighter, with full access to all property, and human contact the members of the [EMPIRE] military industrial complex personnel, inject a few dozen cats on one side of the Mexican boarder and placed them over the fence line of the [EMPIRE] and wait. It would never happen, maybe, maybe not but we have learned that one should beware of never, saying never to One half million possible biological agents.

    HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVINIEN

    1. El Commentariosa

      This has nothing to do with the Habs getting an Anglo coach.

    2. Gojira

      Needs moar lolcatz.

    3. Capitalisms

      But what about the [LIZARD MEN] and [STARBUCKS]?

    4. Grazie mille.

  18. RoboCain

    “Have you ever wished Ugg boots would just go away? The good folks at Pottstown Middle School in Pottstown, PA have, but unlike most people, they didn’t just fantasize longingly about burning all the students’ Ugg boots in one big bonfire. They fucking got off their asses and did something about it.”

    http://thegloss.com/fashion/mi…..boots-634/

    1. hazeeran

      Observe my croc tears.

      1. Anonymous Coward

        Your Crocs are next.

    2. Brett L

      I can’t defend Uggs, even on free expression grounds.

      1. Episiarch

        That’s because they’re an assault on your eyes and your sense of style. Therefore, they are initiating force against you. You shouldn’t feel any need to defend them on any grounds.

      2. JW

        I dunno, I kinda like them.

        1. PantsFan

          I’d prefer her without the boots.

          1. cynical

            Wait, I thought that was just an unnervingly lifelike mannequin.

        2. Brett L

          Think how much hotter she’d be in real boots.

          1. JW

            YOU NEVER HAVE HER TAKE THE BOOTS OFF!

            Fucking amateurs.

      3. Bingo

        spray-on jeans + uggs are like standard female cold weather wear… and I got noooo complaints!

        1. dunphy

          uggs were popular with surfers, myself included, 25+ yrs ago, and still are.

  19. ?

    [? SAYS]: I want a prequel where the Mosaic Industrial Complex carries the [CAT] pest out of Egypt.

    The Western Desert, [EMPRIRE’S] Litter Box

    1. sir lurks-a-lot

      oh cent sign. you’re my favorite completely-insane person.

  20. RoboCain

    “A woman falsely accused a man she met on a bus of rape after he could not recall her name when she met him again in a pub.”

    http://www.cambridge-news.co.u…..012012.htm

    1. Mike M.

      People who claim that false rape accusations are rare are misinformed or lying. They will never admit it publicly, but off the record most law enforcement agencies will tell you that somewhere between 40 and 50 percent of the accusations are lies.

      1. .

        As will many who have been falsely accused.

      2. Coeus

        I always enjoy witnessing the cognitive dissonance of people who say that “conviction rates are too low, too many rapists are getting away”, and then use the stat showing convictions of false accusations, and claim that those are the only ones that are false.

  21. Dick Hertz

    Because you can’t get enough retarded newsletter commentary…

  22. Warty

    Coffinworm

    1. sage

      The fuck?

      1. Episiarch

        You’re very terse toady, sage.

        1. Episiarch

          That was supposed to be “today”, but I like “toady” better.

          1. sage

            You’re a washcloth!

      2. Warty

        IF ITS TOO LOUD YER TOO OLD

        1. Eduard van Haalen

          What?

  23. PantsFan

    Alternative headline:
    Appeal to Emotion fuels the war on drugs

    Chad Davis was murdered, his body stuffed into a barrel and and then thrown in a river in 2008.

    Because if drugs were legal, this would have happened anyway?

    1. Exactly. Just like all thew deaths that result from alcohol turf wars nowadays.

      1. dunphy

        yea, i got into a gunfight with some revenoooers just the other day. man, those fuckers were spraying fire from their tommy guns all over the over fucking place. i had my roscoe out and was getting a bead on one of these mopes lickety split.

    2. Troy

      I feel for this woman’s loss but she is a fucking idiot. This case show exactly why drugs should be legal.

      If he owed Walgreens (instead of, apparently, someone the likes of the Zetas) for some weed that son had charged, instead of son being dead, Walgreen’s would just write off the debt or sell it off to a debt collector. Instead of being fucking dead, her son would be called at 8:00 a.m. and be annoyed. Hmmmm…. Annoyed vs. Dead????????

      I am sorry for this woman’s loss but she is a fucking i

  24. Brian from Texas

    I didn’t expect it to happen this soon but I certainly expected Gingrich to lose steam. He may still win in a few states but he’ll fizzle out.

  25. Anonymous Coward

    Iran is threatening to cut Europe off of the oily teat? Guess we know who Obama will attack if he wins in November.

    Just ask Ghadaffi what happens when you fuck with France.

    1. Cytotoxic

      Kind of funny you should mention that-France has had a tiff with Ghadhaffi since the ’80s.

      1. Tulpa

        I thought their beef was more with the Libyan refugees washing up on their shores, not with God-daffy himself.

        Last thing France wants is more angry Arabs/Moors.

        1. Cytotoxic

          That was the immediate concern for all of Europe, but France has had its neo-imperial tentacles their forever. When Libya was defeated by Chadians literally riding in Toyota pickups in the late 1980s, France was backing them up. It’s just an element of France’s rather intriguing and murky foreign policy in much of Africa, for which it has yet to be blowbacked except for that airplane Ghadhafi bombed.

  26. NotSure

    What do European countries expect ? that Iran happily keep on supplying oil until July when the sanctions officially start. Also they decide to apply sanctions when the economies are not exactly going through the best of times, really stupid.

    1. Sevo

      NotSure|1.27.12 @ 7:25PM|#
      “What do European countries expect ?”

      Unicorns. Money orchards. Free shit.
      That’s all.

    2. Tulpa

      You’re talking about a continent that once ran the world until they destroyed themselves with two world wars.

      1. Cytotoxic

        That’s a good point. The sooner Europe is ‘ended’ the better.

      2. Troy

        I never thought I would say this, not sober anyway, but this is a good point.

    3. Al 'the pal' Lawson

      Bruges is a shithole.

  27. Brett L

    Men are statistically likely to know a woman is on her period just by listening to a woman read numbers. Evolution, survival by adaptation.

    1. Coeus

      I know when I go though long periods where I’m working with free weights a lot, I can tell oestress by smell (ok, there’s no smell, it’s hard to describe, but it does require inhaling through the nose).

    2. Francisco d Anconia

      lap dancers make 80 percent more money in tips when they’re ovulating compared to when they’re menstruating

      Might be the string thing.

  28. El Commentariosa

    You will want to hurt someone after looking at this.

    1. Nipplemancer

      You dun SF’d that link.
      IIRC that image has been posted several times since the OWS thing started. It was stupid then and stupid now.

  29. Anonymous Coward

    Chris Matthews just (stealthily, or as close to it as he can manage) accused Newt Gingrich of being an anti-Semite, for constantly using Saul Alinsky’s name, which, according to Chris, “sounds Jewish.”

    1. Maxxx

      I wonder if Newt’s patron knows.

  30. Coeus

    I just got used to choking them on request, and then this pops up:

    http://www.xojane.com/sex/plea…..during-sex

    1. Eduard van Haalen

      “Oh, she said *don’t* hit me? Well, your Honor, in all the excitement I missed that one word.”

  31. Eduard van Haalen

    English atheists in catfight:

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/book…..CMP=twt_gu

    1. Cytotoxic

      I really wish more of my fellow unbelievers would just STFU a little bit.

    2. cynical

      Praise Science!

  32. El Commentariosa

    I WANT NEWT MOON PIE

  33. Colonel_Angus

    “lying about being a war hero is not protected speech”

    The speech is not the correct issue. The liar is probably doing it to rip someone off in some way. Someone can make a reasonable claim about themselves being a war hero of some kind, regardless of formal recognition or any military service. Abolishing medals would straighten this out.

    1. Coeus

      The speech is not the correct issue. The liar is probably doing it to rip someone off in some way.

      Doubtfull. It’s usually someone trying to win an argument or get laid in a bar.

      1. dunphy

        it’s also kind of a tangent because fraud is illegal whether or not it’s committed via lying about military decorations.

        this law makes it a crime to lie about receiving a medal one did not receive whether or not one receives, or intends to receive pecuniary benefits

        1. DuncePhy

          Still no law against claiming to be married to Morgan Fairchild, amirite?

        2. Colonel_Angus

          I hate these auxiliary crimes like “obstruction of justice”.

          1. dunphy

            you can’t have an effective justice^H^Hlegal system w/o such laws.

            they are essential.

            most people don’t obstruct. i might have to make 2-3 such arrests a year. very small %age. but without such laws, you incentivize lawlessness and would have more of it.

            1. Troy

              Bullshit. Obstruction of Justice laws are nothing more than fancy, “Respect my Authoritahhhh” laws.

          2. dunphy

            fwiw, if you are refering to this stolen valor law, i see no valid comparison between it and obstruction laws.

            the latter are essential for rule of law and effective legal system to work.

            we could very well do w/o a stolen valor law, setting aside the constitutional questionability of such a law.

            1. Colonel_Angus

              I know of a guy who got charged with obstruction of justice because he threw his bowl out the window after being in a car wreck. Its a completely rational thing to do. Obstruction potentially criminalizes actions that may or may not be done in an obstructive context. If you’re charging someone with obstruction, you’re most likely already charging them with the actual crime that attracted attention in the first place. We could do well without such shit.

              1. dunphy

                except there are a vast # of circumstances where obstructing applies but other laws don’t

                for example, during a terry , there is not PC to arrest for anything. however, one can still obstruct.

                witnesses can also obstruct., for example, interfering in the arrest of another… at that point they commit a crime – obstructing

                i don’t possibly see how throwing a bowl out a window is obstructing. littering maybe. regardless, i can’t speak to that state’s law, or the particular circs.

                i can say that without a penalty for obstructing and a right to arrest for it, there is no disincentive against people obstructing, and no way to stop it while it is in progress

                and just because such laws, like most others, can be abused , does not mean we don’t need them ENFORCED validly

                the last obstructing arrest i made was a person who interfered with me providing medical care for a person suffering from acute alcohol poisoning. he was a .40 and easily could have died. fuck that guy. and he pled guilty too

                1. Colonel_Angus

                  I didn’t say “a bowl”, I said “his bowl”. What kind of bowl do you think someone would throw out the window, because they didn’t want the nice helpful responders to see it?

                  1. dunphy

                    well, excuuuse me. i didn’t realize the possessive pronoun didn’t apply to kitchenware.

                    look, again, it sounds STUPID. sounds more like littering. can’t speak to THAT state’s statute or whether this was a valid application of same.

                    i’ve had guys drop stuff upon my approach, often contraband. i never even considered it “obstructing” and i’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be as our statute is written

                    but an example of an apparently bad application of a law is not reason to HATE those kind of laws, nor an argument against their necessity.

                    we could do well with eliminating a substantial portion of our bloated penal codes. but obstructing laws are essential to public safety, administration of justice and not incentivizing lawlessness

                    another example

                    we go to a house to arrest a guy for a warrant. we know he;s in there because we have surveilled him.

                    we have a WARRANT to enter the house

                    woman at the door REFUSES to let us enter

                    she got arrested for obstructing. she got two warnings first AND we showed her the warrant. her bad.

                    we need these laws for the RARE cases of people that impede the administration of justice. w.o these laws, we cannot enforce other laws, and people get rewarded for obstructing investigations, since there would be no disincentive for them to stop doing it.

                    that’s a bad thing

                    1. Colonel_Angus

                      I doubt that the woman would have been able to prevent you from arresting the guy. She probably would have ended up committing physical crimes, or passively backed off after being shoved aside.

                      But obstruction of justice can apply to physical evidence, or even the perceived lack of it. This application is a way to compel some one to incriminate them self. And I guarantee everyone tries to alter evidence if they have the chance, so the law doesn’t prevent dicksquat.

                      Its another problem that the term is interpreted so broadly.

                    2. dunphy

                      it’s two clear examples i gave you of why such laws are necessary. if you choose to ignore them, that’s your problem

                      as for your other issue, you are simply wrong on the law. as usual

                      i know you want to concentrate on your silly bowl example. there is a right that any person has not to incriminate themself. note also this refers to testimonial evidence. see: Miranda v. arizona etc.

                      there is no “right” to throw contraband out the window as a cop approaches, whatever silly obstruction law was used in that case.

                      there is a right not to answer questions about it.

                      those are entirely different things, although again largely irrelevant to the issue of why we need obstruction laws

                    3. Al 'the pal' Lawson

                      Is it considered burning evidence if you haven’t been charged with a crime yet?

                    4. Coeus

                      and people get rewarded for obstructing investigations, since there would be no disincentive for them to stop doing it.

                      And there’s no disencentive for cops not to abuse it, either. Which means in their current form, they are bad. Unless you want to make the argument that cops aren’t people.

                    5. dunphy

                      wwwwaaaahhhh!!

                      ANY law can be abused. that’s yet another funhouse mirror argument you can use.

                      ANY LAW

                      in a society that values s the rule of law, the rights of crime victims to havet investigations carried out without interference, and that beleives that nobody has the right to obstruct justice, we have such laws

                      fortunately, your funhouse mirror arguments hold no sway

                      in any nation on earth i am aware of.

                    6. Coeus

                      You said yourself that cases were rare. The charge is not. Since it doesn’t effect you negatively, I can see how you might think it below consideration.

                      The bottom line is that these laws are always written (or interpreted) too broadly. And it’s always in the cop’s favor. But since you feel that they can be beneficial to you, you defend them as written, with admittedly rare examples. Then you accuse me of funhouse mirror arguments. Your lack of self-awareness often approaches that of the feminists.

                    7. Coeus

                      in a society that values s the rule of law, the rights of crime victims to havet investigations carried out without interference,

                      Yet, strangely enough, obstruction is most often used in cases where there is no victim.

                    8. dunphy

                      there is plenty of incentive for cops not to abuse such laws, but since the history is clear of people ignoring evidence that upsets the metanarrative, i don’t know why i bother.

                      look, cops could “abuse” miranda too. they could just lie, say they advised when they didn’t etc.

                      ANYTHING can be abused, so that’s a stupid, but typical argument

                      these laws are necessary for the administration of justice

                      if ANYBODY should understand incentives, it’s libertarians

                      but sadly, many can be blind when their pet prejudices are poked

                    9. Colonel_Angus

                      Also, have you actually bothered to charge someone with littering while ignoring drugs? What did you write on the paperwork?

                      It doesn’t count as litter because they would probably want to retrieve it when they got the chance unless you took it away (and probably smoked it). Dick move to charge someone with littering a piece especially if you are charging them with something more serious like a DUI.

                    10. dunphy

                      have i ever charged anybody with littering for doing this?

                      no.

                      why?

                      because it’s chippy as fuck. i’ve never even HEARD of anybody doing so.

                      that is tangential to your ridiculous legal argument that littering wouldn’t apply because they would “probably want to retrieve it when they got the chance”

                      that’s a silly “legal” argument, even for reason.com

                      feel free to run that argument by your local defense attorney and he’ll explain to you why it’s beyond ridiculous.

                      you ARE right that it’s a dick move though. it’s chippy as fuck. i would never do it

                      that ‘s ENTIRELY tangential, as usual, to the point – which is that the 5th amendment does not recognize a right to commit acts to conceal evidence. it recognizes a right not to testimonially incriminate oneself.

                      that’s the de jure reading anyways.

                      there was a case at volokh. com a while ago where they charged a guy with destruction of evidence. he learned a warrant was going to be served on him for possession of child porn, so he (attempted) to erase the files.

                      he was charged and convicted… evidence destruction iirc.

                    11. Colonel_Angus

                      You said its “chippy” to put on additional bullshit charges when you are already charging someone. That’s what I’m getting at. Look at the Wikipedia page for obstruction of justice. The law regarding evidence was practically written to be abused. There are also data retention laws that penalize parties for not saving old media. The examples of “interfering” by people other than the focus of the police action are not what I had in mind and I believe this should be a separate thing. Call assault, “assault”.

                      One more thing, I do not intend the littering thing to be a legal argument, just a statement of what the fuck everyone knows that.

                    12. Colonel_Angus

                      I know of another guy (no friend of mine) who was caught with weed in a search regarding something unrelated. The cops cunts “looked the other way” on the weed and “disposed” (probably smoked) of it, except they mentioned it in the report. The prosecutor added the charge later. And the cops testified about it in the pretrial. That charge got dropped though because he plead out for the original thing.

                      I have a copy of the actual affidavit from my former attorney and I stalked the proceedings of the case, although I cut off all contact with the guy.

                    13. dunphy

                      i seriously doubt the prosecutor could have gotten the charge to stick. where is the corpus delicti?

                      i actually find it pretty hard to believe he could even charge it (ethically) since it stands ZERO chance of conviction. and i won’t even get into “best evidence” rule, but it’s ridiculous

                      here’s what it comes down to.

                      there needs to be a disincentive FOR obstructing. obstrucing, unlike drugs, NEEDS to be illegal. it is simply the type of behavior that must be proscribed in a civil society

                      in my example. first of all, IF obstructing is not illegal, then if the woman refuses to move out of the doorway after we order her to, and we go hands on TO move her, that in itself is problematic.

                      if she struggles, what do we do? arrest her? for WHAT? what RIGHT do we have to move her, if telling her to move is not justified under any legal theory, since there would be no such thing as obstructing in your bizarro world?

                      it’s simply the ridiculous kind of alice in wonderland shit we get when you get these bizarro ideas.

                      furthermore, again, let’s look at reality

                      the VAST majority of people do not obstruct

                      some people are just good people who don’t need laws (iow a risk of punishment) in order to do the right thing

                      MANY do

                      if there is no risk of negative results for her obstructing us, why WOULDN’T she?

                      why would a bad person cooperate in allowing us into the house (the warrant was for aggravated assault btw. the guy was a fucking piece of shit thug) if there was NO penalty for NOT doing so, and they didn’t want us to capture him?

                      and what if we tried to move her, and she started fighting and got hurt? under what legal theory were we allowed to move her?

                      the answer is – BECAUSE SHE IS OBSTRUCTING our lawful actions – to apprehend the bad guy

                      this the kind of shit you just haven’t thought out

                      the “idea” of obstructing , since it SEEMS like a victimless crime just offends you

                      the fact is it is in no way analogous to true victimless “crimes” e.g. prostitution, drug use, etc. because there ARE victims – everyone from the victim of the underlying crime being investigated (the assault), to society at large, since the administration of justice is being thwarted

                      obstructing simply needs to be illegal

                      and again, it needs to be enforced RELATIVELY rarely because when johnny shitbag gets arrested for obstructing , it has a multiplier effect – it’s like clairol or something

                      criminals talk. i know how much they do because i hung out with them extensively while udnercover. they share arrest stories, etc. heck, they have a very good idea of what dept’s are fair, and what dept’s tend to have dickheads working for them. i remember when i first started working for my PD and some guy was acting up and being a dick. i was wearing a raincoat and he couldn’t see my patch. i said “sir why are you acting like a jerk? we’ve treated you fairly, right?” he says “you (blank) PD guys are always dicks to me”. i said “(blank PD)? i work for (blickety blam) PD and showed him my badge

                      he was like “oh, i’m sorry sir. i didn’t realize you were with blickety blam pd” and sat upright and stopped acting like a fool

                      good behavior on the part of the cops is rewarded.

                      GOOD cops have street cred. even some of the saltiest criminals who have dealt with me or talked to others who have, KNOW i am fair, so i am going to be less likely to get obstructed or assaulted or whatever vs. the guy who has a rep as a dickhead

                      works both ways

                      these guys talk and when johnny dirtbag is arrested for obstructing HE TELLS HIS FRIENDS and it creates disincentives. he doesn’t do it again

                      this is similar to how tasing works. i can’t tell you how many times i have seen tasing get voluntary complianc because the guy HAS been tased before, he knows it sucks and so he complies with no fight, and neither us, nor him has to risk injury

                      the reality is that most people are good people and will respect and obey cops .

                      a small %age won’t ever comply and they are usually the ones that eventually end up dead, or in prison for life, because they finally take it one step too far and commit some crime (for the umpteenth time) where the victim, whether it’s a cop, an armed homeowner, or another criminal, takes him out

                      obstructing laws nip a lot of stuff in the bud that would escalate and get a lot worse if not for that relief valve of the arrest and the “lesson”

                      the criminals learn if they comply, they may get arrested for other crimes they have done, but they will be treated fairly and be respected. and they know if they try to interfere with their buddy’s arrest, or impede our lawful investigation, they are going to get arrested themselves

                      also, imo, if cops didn’t have the legal tools to force compliance, you would probably see MORE force, not less, and also see less successful investigations

                      if cops know that they can’t demand compliance with simple demands and do an investigation without being obstructed, and have resources if they are obstructed, they will just go fuck it. i know cops who bust their ass going after bad guys. my partner and i caught a pretty heinous fuckstick stalker the other night, and even managed to get the prosecutor to set 100k bail, which si phenomenal. this guy has been TERRORIZING her and her daughter

                      that’s because we have the tools to do that investigation and we know that if the shit goes wrong, we will have backup and legal recourses.

                      imo, you simply don’t think through this shit and you have no idea how the street WORKS

                      it works pretty damn well the vast majority of the time, and it would work far less efficiently, with far more victims, without obstructing laws

                    14. Troy

                      there needs to be a disincentive FOR obstructing

                      Say who? I don’t have fucking obligation to help you do your fucking job. I would say I do have a duty not to interefere with you exercising you authority to help save someone’s life or stop someone from being beaten. Any other intereference…..[rasberry].

                      Oh, and by the way, if someone is dying and I am being a dick, please just mow me down.

                    15. dunphy

                      you don’t have an obligation to help

                      helping would be a positive duty

                      you have a duty NOT to obstruct

                      i realize that might be difficult for you to understand, but it is the law, and it is also common sense.

                      if you don’t like it, suck it.

                    16. dunphy

                      the law was not written to be abused any more than the laws allowing criminal defendants to testify on their behalf or call witnesses on their behalf was “written to be abused”. it CAN be abused when they perjure themselves, or suborn perjury, but we don’t throw away the right of defendants to do so, because SOME may abuse it

                      we take and deal with the abuses when we can prove them. often, they get away with it. such is life

                    17. the 5th amendment does not recognize a right to commit acts to conceal evidence.

                      Actually, it does, just not in the self-incrimination clause.

                      It does so in the takings clause.

                      Until a warrant is judicially approved, my property is my property and is not “evidence” of anything.

                      I realize our quisling courts don’t recognize it, but until the moment a warrant is approved I should have the unlimited right to destroy any property of mine, and should be under no burden to “preserve” anything for anyone.

                      If the state says I can’t destroy my own property, that limit on my property’s use is an uncompensated takings, and beyond that it’s happening without due process of law (until there’s a warrant, at which point the due process issue is closed).

                    18. dunphy

                      that’s a nice theory.

                2. Troy

                  interfering in the arrest of another… at that point they commit a crime –

                  In other words, other people can make my job harder. Fucking WAAAAAAA. Join the fucking club.

                  the last obstructing arrest i made was a person who interfered with me providing medical care for a person suffering from acute alcohol poisoning. he was a .40 and easily could have died. fuck that guy. and he pled guilty too

                  This is only true insofar that what you were doing was actually justice, i.e. trying to save the guy’ life. I don’t give a flying fuck about your obstruction of justice definition that apply to any and every conduct of a state agent or hher exercising of her state agency. I look at the end to determine whether justice is being obstructed, not the means. If a bunch of people are lying to make your mnarijuana investigation harder to prove. To fucking bad. Why? Because the proper end is that the guy shouldn’t at all being a position of being fucked with by the badge. If someone is knowingly lying to you to cover for a murder. Well we already have laws for that, like an accessory.

                  1. dunphy

                    except as usual the strawmen start pouring out. it doesn’t apply to “any and every conduct” of a state agent

                    if a state agent goes into a coffee shop and says “i’d like a cup of coffee” and the guy says “fuck off. we don’t serve cops here”, that’s not obstructing. there was a hippie granola coffee shop in portland that did that.

                    that’s their right

                    but when a cop is acting pursuant to an investigation, or in the case of the alcohol poisoning, a community caretaking function (also in loco parentis, since the kid who almost died was 17), then yes… you have the DUTY to comply and the duty NOT to obstruct

                    and that’s too fucking bad if you don’t like it

                    suck it, bitch

                    as for the alcohol poisoning case, it was a loud party complaint (that 99% of the time results in a warning) at 11:30 pm. and yes, it was fuckign loud. the “victim” were the neighbors trying to get some sleep. fwiw, i played in a loud as fuck band for years. cops broke us up numerous times based on complaints and we NEVER had a problem with them, because we didn’t obstruct, and we respected their authoritah acting as agents of the people who were just trying to get a night’s sleep

                    so, anyway i knock and kid comes to the door, opens it and i’m telling him to turn it down when i see the kid on the couch, head back, mouth open, can’t even tell if he’s breathing, he’s obviously either passed out, dead, and/or obliterated out of his mind. the guy refuses to either 1) let us in to check on him OR 2) yell for somebody else in the house to wake him up and get him over so we can make sure he’s ok.

                    so, we push right past him, end up having to get medics (i used to be a medic when i was a firefighter. this kid was fucked up), and thank god the kid lived. dr. said at his blood levels, etc. he very well could have died.

                    either way, the parents love us , the community loves us, and the fuckstick kid who obstructed us even admitted he was wrong, later afte he pled guilty to obstructing, etc

                    what’s ironic is if he had cooperated, he probably wouldn’t have had any charges, since it turned out not to be his house anyway, he wasn’t the one who furnished.

                    you can whine all you want about the cops having too much authoritah in situations like this, but i could not give a flying fuck. the law is reasonable in these cases, and again… you have NO duty to help. you have a duty NOT to hinder

                    in most states, the only DUTY you have to help somebody (that is not your own child, etc.) is if you are involved ina vehicle collision with them AND they are injured. in that case, you must assist with calling 911, etc. if they are not able.

                    in a civil society that values rule of law, and civil rights, we respect the idea that obstructing is, and should be a crime

                    fortunately, apart from a few whiners here, most people recognize that, too

    2. Sevo

      FSM, I *hate* this phrase:
      “lying about being a war hero is not protected speech”
      Who chooses what speech is “protected” when A1 clearly states “congress shall make no law”?
      The point is that the government has no business deciding matters of speech one bit, let alone choosing what is “protected”.
      So, the guys a miserable liar, and it didn’t take long to figure it out.

      1. Tulpa

        Are death threats protected speech?

        1. dunphy

          actually, the title isn’t correct, as i understand it.

          lying about receiving a specific medal is illegal.

          whether or not one is a “hero” is subjective and not subject to the

          1. Colonel_Angus

            Issues like medals can get subjective when dealing with “back in ‘nam” types.

          2. Colonel_Angus

            And we are on the beginning of a whole new phase of that.

            1. dunphy

              i’d have to read the law and understand the medal system in the military to have an opinion on that.

              i’d like to read the case, but i reflexively think the stolen valor law would be unconstitutional.

        2. cynical

          Yes. But causing someone to reasonably fear for their life is not. It isn’t the speech that’s the issue, it’s what it causes to happen. I mean, if there’s some industrial machine activated by voice commands for some insane reason, and I say “start running” while someone’s inside doing maintenance, I can’t just say “tough shit, I was exercising my freedom of speech.”

          1. dunphy

            iirc, and it;’s been a while, the case that originally exempted true threats from free speech protections made the argument that such “speech” actually had an “action” element iow the true threat was not merely speech

            again, iirc

  34. Coeus

    What is the fear factor on donkey semen? Better question: how do they determine the fear factor? Is there an equation?

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..haser.html

    1. rsi

      This has got to be a hoax.

    2. Colonel_Angus

      This has to happen since the field has already been established by breakthroughs such as Jackass. They should have the chaser be the real test, after drinking donkey seed, I doubt the contestants would be able to taste the difference between piss and lemonade.

      1. Colonel_Angus

        Or call it mouth wash and dye it green. Maybe add some actual mouthwash so it seems frothy enough when they swish it around.

  35. PantsFan

    EcoJustice, Raincoast Conservation Fndn and Living Oceans Society have been officially deemed “foreign radicals” by the Prime MInister of Canada.
    Yet they’re Canadian.
    But they are radicals.

    1. Eduard van Haalen

      Even in Canada.

    2. Res Publica Americana

      Isn’t the Prime Miniter of Canada pretty conservative?

  36. gaijin

    so they are free radicals?

  37. Lewis H

    Does anyone have a line on any ETHICAL companies I can buy things from, or is ‘ethical company’ just an oxymoron under capitalism? Either they dump shit into our water, or farm labor over-seas & abuse foreign workers, or cheat on their taxes, mark everything up 500% or they make everything out of plastic to ensure it’ll break quickly, or their customer service sucks, or their CEO is an asshole or they lobby our governments for special treatment & laws that affect us badly OR: all of the above. Companies suck nowadays!

    1. Colonel_Angus

      “Ethical company” is an oxymoron under crony capitalism, not free markets. Ethics these days are corrupted by expected behavior based on generally accepted established policies, when those policies themselves are often ethically questionable. Like taxes.

      Therefore, I may not consider cheating on taxes to be unethical. You have to look much deeper than the party and behavior itself to understand what would incentivize the things you listed to be done.

      1. Lewis H

        You make it sound like there’s a difference.

        1. Colonel_Angus

          Specify. I know that you are about to introduce a dishonest argument.

          1. Lewis H

            The customer and the laborer take a back seat to the almighty dollar.

            1. Colonel_Angus

              Dishonest. In a free market, companies have an interest in attracting customers and productive workers from competitors. In crony capitalism, a company can just get the government to legislate a market advantage.

              1. Lewis H

                Very sick of seeing a company post record profits in the BILLIONS, meanwhile their workers suffer, the mark-up is ridiculous…
                People are > Profits.

                1. Mr. FIFY

                  Guess you don’t give a shit about profit *margins*, eh, Lewis?

                  Go the fuck over to DU. You’ll be happier posting there, where “profit” is as much a dirty, nasty epithet as “pig-fucker”.

                  1. Lewis H

                    So this is the place where we bow down and worship profits at the expense of laborers and customers?

                    1. Mr. FIFY

                      Uh, sure, Slick. Whatever.

                      Like I said, you’re not happy here. Go to, oh, say… FireDogLake. You’ll be among friends there.

                    2. Lewis H

                      I’m here to gain understanding.
                      TEACH ME.
                      Why are profits more important then the workers?

                    3. Mr. FIFY

                      The fuck you are. You hate the very sound of the word “profit”; ergo, there IS no “teaching” you.

                    4. Lewis H

                      Profits are made by squeezing every last drop out of laborers and customers. Tell me why that’s more valuable. You won’t because you can’t.

                    5. Mr. FIFY

                      Then urge your Congressmen to make profits illegal.

                      Or, shut the fuck up.

                      Your choice, Slick.

                    6. A Serious Man

                      Holy mother of Christ, we got a left-winger here who still believes in the labor theory of value. Color me shocked.

                      Let me remind you that the LTV as it pertains to your apparent hatred of profits is as relevant to economics as Young Earth Creationism is to science.

                    7. Mr. FIFY

                      It’s kinda like talking to another Tony, isn’t it?

                    8. Mr. FIFY

                      “The LTV”… kinda sounds like a church, doesn’t it?

                    9. A Serious Man

                      Well like Scientology socialism combines faith and pseudo-science to blindside the intellectually weak and emotionally vulnerable into following it without question to their own detriment and the benefit of only a handful of people that know how to exploit the useful idiots.

                      I thank God for introducing me to the right teacher that dispelled this nonsene for me in high school.

                    10. Mr. FIFY

                      Indeed. Good for all of us who haven’t succumbed to the “word” of egalitarianism.

            2. Colonel_Angus

              LTV Steel went bankrupt a long ass time ago. Because of unions. LTV didn’t work out.

    2. Mr. FIFY

      Shit out of luck, Lewis. According to you, if any “ethical” company makes even one thin dollar in profit, you can’t buy anything from them.

      Go west, young Lewis. North Korea could use someone like you.

    3. cynical

      Do you know any ethical people you can do business with? Shit, nobody’s perfect.

  38. Rev. Blue Moon

    Responding to the trolls gets you what you deserve.

    1. Mr. FIFY

      Sometimes it’s fun. Besides, they’re just begging to be abused.

    2. Colonel_Angus

      I don’t mind giving them attention the first time. Its a nice introduction if they are going to keep up the shit. I probably won’t deal with Lewis H again. Sounds like Tony anyway. Or maybe Choad’s back.

  39. Lewis H

    Still no answer…

    1. Mr. FIFY

      You won’t accept any answer that doesn’t somehow make profits illegal, Lewis.

      Be a disingenuous tool of Team Blue. It suits you. But go do it somewhere else, because you didn’t come here to learn anything.

      1. Lewis H

        Tell me why they shouldn’t be. Go ahead.

        1. Mr. FIFY

          Like I said… you didn’t come here to learn anything.

          1. Lewis H

            So you can’t.

            1. Mr. FIFY

              You won’t accept ANY answer, because you believe all profit is evil.

              Go the fuck away, Lewis. You’re just going to be more and more unhappy here.

              1. Rokk Krinn

                Labor = Profit = Evil

                Labor = Evil

        2. Barack Obama

          Workin’ on it, Lewis. Just vote for Me, as many times as your white, worthless ass can get away with, and I’ll make “profit” a thing of the past.

          1. Karl Marx

            You are slacking, chocolate-hued fellow. By now, I would have had dead bodies stacked like firewood.

            1. V. I. Lenin

              Oh please Karl, everyone knows you were just a prissy scholar that didn’t know which end of the gun to point.

              I, on the other hand, purged Russia of the nobility and middle class and wrote the book on the creating a repressive secret police that made sure no one exploited the worker or engaged in counter-revolutionary activites.

              1. Karl Marx

                Bah. Without ME, Vladimir, you would have been mere cog in capitalist machine.

                1. Lewis H.

                  Damn… this is getting hot! Now THIS is what I call getting educated!

                  Then again, I knew all this stuff already.

                2. Friedrich Engels

                  Fuck you Karl, all those years I worked and paid the rent while you just sat on your ass writing manifestos (which I helped you write) and playing Skyrim. Worst roomate ever!

                  1. Colonel_Angus

                    I like how Lenin and Stalin turned lowly labor interests against each other. They did it for power. But I just find the conflict entertaining. Imagine service employees versus teamsters. Comedy.

                3. V.I. Lenin

                  But hey Karl,

                  How many death camps you got?

                  I gotz the meneys!!

    2. Rokk Krinn

      Are not wages earned from labor a form of profit?

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