Regulation

Federal Caterer Crackdown Grabs Pre-Cut Carrots from Tiny Children's Hands

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a caterer has clearly lost control of how this food is handled

The federal government has finally taken action against the menace of pre-cut carrots in bagged lunches. The Washington Examiner reports:

Good Food [which sells freshly prepared breakfast, lunch and snacks to Washington-area day care centers and schools] was founded in 1979, and in its 30-plus years of existence, the USDA has never subjected the firm to inspection. Then Obama was elected.

This year, the Food Safety and Inspection Service, the USDA's enforcement arm, notified Good Food that it was in violation of FMIA. Despite zero evidence of any actual harm to consumers, the USDA determined that because Good Food delivered its food to day care centers and schools, instead of directly serving it to individual customers, it did not qualify for the caterer exemption.

According to FSIS documents, the agency believes that "the nature of the catering business has changed" and it has "concerns" that caterers are "losing control of how the food is being handled."

So FSIS conducted a sting operation of 54 caterers nationwide. The stunning finding? "No food safety violation observed."

Despite no evidence of any food safety violations, or any actual harm to consumers, FSIS gave Good Food and 17 other caterers a "Notice of Warning," meaning they had "180 days to modify their business model and comply with FSIS rules and regulations."

Prospering food businesses put out of commission by regulators despite a lack of evidence that anyone is being harmed with no way for people who want to comply with the law to make good. Sound familiar?

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  1. Has Reason seen the new Federal Lead Paint regs? Aye Carumba!

    1. Fuck you, I have. I am a painting contractor. I have to take a course to “qualify”, or some bullshit, even though I’ve been doing it for 30 fucking years. The EPA can suck my big, fat, circumcised cock. When are we going to put these God damned slimy little Communist shit twinkle toed cock sucking mother fuckers up against the wall?

      1. You know if they didn’t make lead paint so tasty, I wouldn’t be eating it all the time.

        1. The EPA’s own tests show that lead paint dust only affects children under 6 who reside in the house that is being worked on. Yet, any mechanical sanding or scraping of lead paint is outlawed on all houses, except houses owned by senior citizens.

      2. When are we going to put these God damned etc. etc.

        “We,” Comrade? What is stopping you?

  2. It is perfectly logical to believe that without government, food companies will put arsenic in all their products, make sure all their food is rotten and make sure the children are fed carrots with maggots in them. Thats what I would do if were not for those darn regulations.

    1. I got into a discussion about regulation with a guy on the bus who believes that if the government didn’t regulate the meat supply, unscrupulous evil people would sell bad meat to poor people who had no choice, which would kill their kids. Ergo, we MUST have the FDA.

      So I asked him if UL was a government entity. He said no, so I asked him if it’s good enough to protect us from bad appliance makers, then why not meat? He said that meat was different.

      So then I asked him, “If a meat processing company wanted to test every head of cattle it processed for mad cow disease, would you be okay with that?” He said sure. So I told him, “Well, the FDA says they can’t.”

      He looked very perplexed and asked me why? So I told him that it’s because if the company did that, they’d have an unfair advantage over their rent-seeking competition.

      1. Its not the FDA (Food and Drug Administration) who regulates meat and poultry, its the USDA as in the (United States Department of Agriculture). The agency under USDA who regulates meat and poultry is FSIS which stands for Food Safety and Inspection Service. At least know what your talking about before you decide to try and educate everyone else.

  3. Good Food [which sells freshly prepared breakfast, lunch and snacks to Washington-area day care centers and schools] was founded in 1979, and in its 30-plus years of existence, the USDA has never subjected the firm to inspection. Then Obama was elected.

    You can end all sorts of horror short stories with such suspenseful phrase…

    “The last person on Earth was sitting down in his living room couch. Then Obama was elected.”

    1. Well, logically, Obama would be the last person on Earth, and why wouldn’t he vote for himself?

  4. WTF did that pack of blithering bureaucrats think they were going to find in these raids?

    -jcr

    1. Checks from these companies’ competitors?

    2. Probably raw milk. Those damn Amish are everywhere, man.

  5. That which is not regulated, must be regulated lest something harmful happen someday, and the lead story is how the regulators failed to regulate. If businesses fail and kids don’t get their carrots, that is a small price to pay.

  6. Paging November 2012. November 2012.

    1. Is this the party to whom I am speaking…?

  7. “Regutopia: We’re just one more rule/law/directive away from Nirvana….”

    1. Where’s my shotgun?

      1. Sorry, that shotgun didn’t meet regulations so it was destroyed.

        1. Can I borrow yours, if I promise to make sure it turns into a huge talking point for the gun-control lobby?

          1. I sent mine to Mexico.

      2. Nirvana, shotgun … the ingredients for a Kurt Cobain joke are all here, but I just can’t seem to put them together.

  8. Why aren’t companies hiring?

    1. What companies? Everybody works for the government.

  9. Given that Good Food is located in Arlington, Virginia, and given that it has a smug name like “Good Foods” I’m guessing that it’s run by Obama-loving lefties. I’m trying hard to resist the Schadenfreude.

    1. i sure hope that’s sarcasm.

      If not…uh…calling your service “Good” is smug? Compared to what, using the family name, Lipschitz?

  10. Goddamn. How do the government-is-good types go through the day without killing themselves, or, at the very least, changing their minds?

    How do the brains of the flunkies who enforce this shit just sit still without attempting to dislodge through the eyeballs to escape the minds they are imprisoned? Poor things must be like Tuggy from the old Russel Crowe reality show. What a horrible existence.

    1. Re: alan,

      How do the government-is-good types go through the day without killing themselves, or, at the very least, changing their minds?

      Do not underestimate the power of expediency, Luke.

  11. As Jon Stewart has said, thank God the Obama administration has re-instituted the regulatory apparatus of the state, and thus protected us from the evil carrotcutters.

  12. YOU LITTLE SCUMBAG. I GOT YOUR NAME, I GOT YOUR ASS. YOU WILL NOT LAUGH, YOU WILL NOT CRY. YOU WILL LEARN BY THE NUMBERS, I WILL TEACH YOU. NOW GET UP, GET ON YOUR FEET.

    You had best unfuck yourself or I will UNSCREW YOUR HEAD AND SHIT DOWN YOUR NECK!

  13. I wonder if there’s a union shop that benefits from this?

  14. You know who else had prospering food businesses put out of commission by regulators despite a lack of evidence that anyone is being harmed with no way for people who want to comply with the law to make good?

  15. The Food Police

    Paths converged with the dirt trail as it broadened into a gravel
    country road. Instead of jungle, Jonathan passed rolling pastures
    and fields of ripening crops and rich orchards. The sight of all
    that food growing reminded Jonathan of how little he had eaten for
    lunch. He detoured toward a neat white farmhouse, hoping to fi nd
    his bearings and maybe another meal.
    On the front porch, he found a young woman and a small boy
    huddled together crying.
    “Excuse me,” said Jonathan awkwardly. “Is there any trouble?”
    The woman looked up, eyes wet with tears. “It’s my husband.
    Oh, my husband!” she wailed. “I knew one day it would come to
    this. He’s been arrested,” she sobbed, “by the Food Police!”
    “I’m very sorry to hear about that, ma’am. Did you say ‘Food
    Police’?” asked Jonathan. He patted the dark head of the boy
    sympathetically. “Why did they arrest him?”
    The woman gritted her teeth, fighting to hold back tears.
    Scornfully, she said, “His crime was that of growing too much
    food!”
    Jonathan was shocked. This island was truly a strange place!
    “It’s a crime to grow too much food?”
    The woman continued, “Last year the Food Police issued orders
    telling him how much food he could produce and sell to the country
    folk. They told us that too much food would lower prices and so
    hurt the other farmers.” She bit her lip slightly then blurted out, “My
    husband was a better farmer than all the rest of them put together!”
    Instantly Jonathan heard a sharp roar of laughter behind him. A
    heavyset man strutted up the path from the road to the farmhouse.
    “Ha!” he sneered, “I say that the best farmer is the one who gets
    the farm. Right?” With a grand sweep of his hand, the man glared
    at the woman and her son and commanded, “Now get your things
    packed and out of here! The Council of Lords has awarded this land
    to me.”
    The man grabbed up a toy dog that was lying on the steps and
    thrust it into Jonathan’s hands. “I’m sure she can use the help, boy.
    Get moving, this is my place now.”
    The woman stood up, her eyes glaring in anger, “My husband
    was a better farmer than you’ll ever be.”
    “That’s a matter of debate,” the man chuckled rudely. “Oh sure,
    he had green fingers. And he was a genius at figuring what to plant
    and how to please his customers. Quite a man! But he forgot one
    thing ? the Council of Lords sets the prices and crops. And the Food
    Police enforce the Council rules.”
    “You parasite!” yelled the woman. “Your farming methods are
    incompetent! You waste good manure and seed on everything you
    plant, and no one wants to buy what you grow. You plant in a flood
    plain or on parched clay, and it never matters if you lose everything.
    You just get the Council of Lords to pay for the rot. They’ve even
    paid you to destroy entire crops.”
    Jonathan frowned, “There’s no advantage in being a good
    farmer?”
    “Being a good farmer is a handicap,” answered the woman as
    her face reddened. “My husband, unlike this toad, refused to flatter
    the Lords and tried to produce honest crops and real sales.”
    Shoving the woman and her boy off the porch, the man growled,
    “Enough! He refused to follow the annual quotas. No one bucks the
    Food Police and gets away with it. Now get off my land!”
    Jonathan helped the woman carry her belongings. The woman
    and her son walked slowly away from their former home. At a bend
    in the road, all turned to take one last look at the neat house and
    barn. “What will happen to you now?” asked Jonathan.
    The woman sighed, “I can’t afford to pay the high food prices.
    Luckily, we’ve got relatives and friends to rely on for help. Otherwise,
    I could beg the Council of Lords to take care of Davy and me. They’d
    like that,” she muttered bitterly. She took the young boy’s hand and
    picked up a large bundle saying, “Come along, Davy.”
    Jonathan gripped his stomach ? now feeling a little more sick
    than hungry.

  16. The Food Police

    Paths converged with the dirt trail as it broadened into a gravel
    country road. Instead of jungle, Jonathan passed rolling pastures
    and fi elds of ripening crops and rich orchards. The sight of all
    that food growing reminded Jonathan of how little he had eaten for
    lunch. He detoured toward a neat white farmhouse, hoping to fi nd
    his bearings and maybe another meal.
    On the front porch, he found a young woman and a small boy
    huddled together crying.
    “Excuse me,” said Jonathan awkwardly. “Is there any trouble?”
    The woman looked up, eyes wet with tears. “It’s my husband.
    Oh, my husband!” she wailed. “I knew one day it would come to
    this. He’s been arrested,” she sobbed, “by the Food Police!”
    “I’m very sorry to hear about that, ma’am. Did you say ‘Food
    Police’?” asked Jonathan. He patted the dark head of the boy
    sympathetically. “Why did they arrest him?”
    The woman gritted her teeth, fi ghting to hold back tears.
    Scornfully, she said, “His crime was that of growing too much
    food!”
    Jonathan was shocked. This island was truly a strange place!
    “It’s a crime to grow too much food?”
    The woman continued, “Last year the Food Police issued orders
    telling him how much food he could produce and sell to the country
    folk. They told us that too much food would lower prices and so
    hurt the other farmers.” She bit her lip slightly then blurted out, “My
    husband was a better farmer than all the rest of them put together!”
    Instantly Jonathan heard a sharp roar of laughter behind him. A
    heavyset man strutted up the path from the road to the farmhouse.
    “Ha!” he sneered, “I say that the best farmer is the one who gets
    the farm. Right?” With a grand sweep of his hand, the man glared
    at the woman and her son and commanded, “Now get your things
    packed and out of here! The Council of Lords has awarded this land
    to me.”
    The man grabbed up a toy dog that was lying on the steps and
    thrust it into Jonathan’s hands. “I’m sure she can use the help, boy.
    Get moving, this is my place now.”
    The woman stood up, her eyes glaring in anger, “My husband
    was a better farmer than you’ll ever be.”
    “That’s a matter of debate,” the man chuckled rudely. “Oh sure,
    he had green fi ngers. And he was a genius at fi guring what to plant
    and how to please his customers. Quite a man! But he forgot one
    thing ? the Council of Lords sets the prices and crops. And the Food
    Police enforce the Council rules.”
    “You parasite!” yelled the woman. “Your farming methods are
    incompetent! You waste good manure and seed on everything you
    plant, and no one wants to buy what you grow. You plant in a fl ood
    plain or on parched clay, and it never matters if you lose everything.
    You just get the Council of Lords to pay for the rot. They’ve even
    paid you to destroy entire crops.”
    Jonathan frowned, “There’s no advantage in being a good
    farmer?”
    “Being a good farmer is a handicap,” answered the woman as
    her face reddened. “My husband, unlike this toad, refused to fl atter
    the Lords and tried to produce honest crops and real sales.”
    Shoving the woman and her boy off the porch, the man growled,
    “Enough! He refused to follow the annual quotas. No one bucks the
    Food Police and gets away with it. Now get off my land!”
    Jonathan helped the woman carry her belongings. The woman
    and her son walked slowly away from their former home. At a bend
    in the road, all turned to take one last look at the neat house and
    barn. “What will happen to you now?” asked Jonathan.
    The woman sighed, “I can’t afford to pay the high food prices.
    Luckily, we’ve got relatives and friends to rely on for help. Otherwise,
    I could beg the Council of Lords to take care of Davy and me. They’d
    like that,” she muttered bitterly. She took the young boy’s hand and
    picked up a large bundle saying, “Come along, Davy.”
    Jonathan gripped his stomach ? now feeling a little more sick
    than hungry.

    1. The webmaster police marked my comment as spam because of the link. So, here it is. Free download. [.pdf]

      http://www.jonathangullible.co…..040222.pdf

  17. USDA was going to call this “Operation Fast and Furious,” but that was already taken.

  18. Does this level the playing field between them and their competition, which would be makers of canned food? Or does it apply only to those who supply meat?

    1. Or does it apply only to those who supply meat?

      I got some meat for ya!

  19. Fucking free market. How does it work?

  20. Prospering food businesses put out of commission by regulators despite a lack of evidence that anyone is being harmed with no way for people who want to comply with the law to make good. Sound familiar?

    This is on the same intellectual level as the “you know who ELSE liked dogs?” guilt by associations.

    To answer your question, this doesn’t sound anything like the food truck disputes, where very different issues are at play. Just because two things involve food and government doesn’t mean they’re instances of the same issue.

  21. We are doomed. This federal agency unilaterally deems the nature of catering to have changed, and sallies forth, without the slightest legislative authorization, to translate their conference room fantasies into real world reality.

    And the perverse incentive is there in full flower. They are not held to account for the perfectly harmless and productive businesses that they damage or destroy. Quite the contrary. Now they can crow about “enforcement actions” and other meretricious “metrics” proving how effective they are.

    Fucking doomed, I tells ya.

  22. why did you glue this carrot in my mouth?

  23. Regulators gotta eat too.

    1. Yes, but they eat at the “Shake Shack.”

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