Four Loko Lawsuits
When The New York Times reported that a certain caffeinated malt beverage "has been blamed" for making a 20-year-old Florida college student shoot himself in the head, you knew a lawsuit could not be far behind. Sure enough, ABC News reports that Joe and Vicki Keiran have sued Phusion Projects, the Chicago-based manufacturer of Four Loko, over the September 17 death of their son, Jason, a Florida State sophomore who "picked up a friend's gun after partying with his roommates for 30 hours straight."
During that period, according to ABC, Jason Keiran drank "at least three cans" of Four Loko, the alcohol equivalent of 14 bottles of beer and the caffeine equivalent of three cups of coffee. The Tallahassee Democrat, which says Keiran drank six cans of Four Loko over a 24-hour period, reports that his blood alcohol concentration at the time of his death was 0.28 percent. Staying up for 30 hours straight surely did not help his mental state. According to the Keirans' attorney, paraphrasing Jason's friends, "He started to act crazy. He pointed the gun at his head and everyone else. He said I realize I'm freaking you guys out; take the gun away from me." ABC adds that "his friends who witnessed the tragedy say it was an accident and his parents say he would never have taken his own life on purpose." All of which may well be true, but that does not mean Four Loko killed him.
Still, the Keirans are more sympathetic than Janice Rivera, a 20-year-old Floridian who sued Phusion Projects after losing her hand in a car crash last August. By her own account, she watched her 20-year-old friend Danielle Joseph (whom she is also suing) down "almost four" 23.5-ounce cans of Four Loko, which has a clearly labeled alcohol content of 12 percent, but still thought Joseph was OK to drive because she did not seem all that drunk.
Look for my column tomorrow about the moral panic behind the FDA's Four Loko ban.
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We all know that the real culprit is Judas Priest.
And Metallica (when they didn't suck)
BOC! They even wrote a song about it. If you play it backwards, the devil tells you to kill your family and then yourself. True story bro!
So did Ozzy. The funny thing was, I don't remember hearing about anyone killing themselves to Don't Fear the Reaper or Suicide Solution.
And it's just fucking weird that someone would do it to Better By You, Better Than Me. Maybe they were drunk on malt beverages spiked with caffeine.
So did Ozzy. The funny thing was, I don't remember hearing about anyone killing themselves to Don't Fear the Reaper or Suicide Solution.
Oh, but I do.
First they got him hooked on bubblegum cigarettes. Then he moved on to cloves. Before long he was drinking caffiene and alcohol at the same time.
In my day they called that "breakfast."
30 hours, really? What a fucking lightweight, my crew did 4 days straight waiting for Zep tickets at the GW forum in the 70's. What is happening to our youth nowadays.
^^^^^horribly insensitive, but true
Alcohol by itself has long been known to be a huge contributing factor to the likelihood of somebody successfully committing suicide. Something about it seems to suppress the survival instinct.
From the Greeks on down, troops have gotten drunk before battle to suppress that survival instinct. If alcohol companies haven't been liable for that kinda thing before, I don't see why mixing it with caffeine would suddenly make any difference.
I guess a jury trial's like a box of chocolates though.
Alcohol by itself has long been known to be a huge contributing factor to the likelihood of somebody successfully committing suicide.
It's also long been a contributing factor to someone:
getting laid,
having a great party,
ringing in the new year,
mourning a lost loved one,
celebrating (or mourning) a wedding,
celebrating a sporting event.
And caffeine is occasionally a part of the mix. Wasn't there a bumper sticker that once said, "You can have my Crown and Coke when you pry it from my cold dead fingers?" Or it may have been Jack, but you get the point.
Since he was under age, I'm surprised they aren't suing the person or persons who supplied the beverage. What's that you say? It was another student with no money or a tiny convenience store? I see.
It's true! Sexting is a dangerous trend that threatens your teen... what's that? We're on this 4 Loko thing now? Right, right, let's see...
Four Loko: Is New Party Brew "Liquid Cocaine?"
I swear, there is nothing as banal as the local and "light" (such as Newsweek) news. They're just stunning in their muckraking.
FWIW, the Tallahassee Democrat (as linked in the blog post) is the Newsweek of small-town daily newspapers.
As a Tallahassean, I say you must apologize to Newsweek. The only thing the Democrat cares about are: 1)Florida State football and 2)stories that embarrass Republican elected officials. In that order. Pretty much everything else is covered by their parent company, which owns USA Today.
You're being much too generous. The Tallahassee Democrat is fit to wipe one's ass on. As a matter of fact, it is a grave insult to your ass to have the Democrat anywhere near it. It bears only the most superficial of resemblances to an actual newspaper. It is, in fact, a slapdash collection of AP wire stories and runny turds assembled by the schizophrenic editor in charge of the meth-fuelled primate house the Democrat calls its writing staff. The act of leaving a copy of the Tallahassee Democrat on someone's lawn or in their old-style newspaper box should be considered a hate crime under federal law.
Don't Ask Me I Read The Democrat
Luckily, the illiteracy of Northern Floridians protects them from the Tallahassee Democrat's attempts to whip them into hysterical frenzies. It's like a auto-immune defense.
If this works out I'll be able to go after people who mix Irish Coffee's.
Cool!
Or rum & cokes!
Anyone planning on trying to take a can of Four Loko through airport security tomorrow?
Tie it to your penis, see if they find it.
"It"? The can of 4Loko, or your penis?
The sky is falling!! The sky is falling!!
Jesus head-spinning Christ, Sullum, get a real fucking job. The idea that contributions from dimwits are going into your pocket for spewing out this tripe ad nauseam make me want to puke. I wonder if I could sue your tiresome ass.
Talk about tiresome.
Yes, it's tiresome the way all of you take its bait.
ABORTION IS LEGAL AND CONVENIENT
Can we invent a time machine and go back to tell Max's mommy this?
I've tried, but my time machine was built to disallow the creation of paradoxes within the present timeline.
Wuss.
(Alternatively: "Real men leave out the Heisenberg Compensators.")
Max, is there some kind of point buried somewhere in your inarticulate little shriek?
Ron Paul is a racist. Did I mention that?
Even though the article does raise good points... it's still tripe. Because it's not Team Blue tripe.
the kid was 20 yo. why don't they sue the person who gave him the Four Loko? they might actually win that one.
It would be nice to see a suit go the other way. Phusion suing the kid's parents for their dumb shit Darwin Award nominee offspring giving a relatively safe product a bad name.
Hey, this is progress. 4 Loko gives people with no sense of personal responsibility or accountability someome to sue and blame besides the gun manufacturers.
Even if I accept their argument. I still place the responsibility on the user of the product.
Some people still think "the drugs made me do it" is a vaild.
Yet another reason to have loser-pays in lawsuit matters.
yes, that's will be right LJJLJLUIDS
if you said you really love me DG3bsFFY