Politics

Miracle in Alaska: Corpse of Corrupt Senator Endorses Write-In Candidate Murkowski!

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Via Hot Air comes one of the most sickening campaign ads of the day.

Here's a commercial for write-in candidate Lisa Murkowski that features the late Sen. Ted Stevens (R-Alaska), who was chased from office due to criminal charges. As the Robert Byrd of the Yukon, Sen. Stevens had shipped as much pork and cash to Alaska as humanly possible, so he's held in high esteem by the citizens there despite that fact that his Senate record is even more shameful than the corruption charges that eventually cost him his seat.

Murkowski is touting an endorsement from Stevens that was originally withheld because of his unexpected death. In great (read: disgusting) style, Murkowski is trying to get credit both for pulling the ad out of sympathy for the family and for getting the endorsement from Stevens. Turn me on, Dead Man! Sorry, Lisa M, it's one or the other. You can't have it both ways. Either you're a good, decent person who did the right thing or you're an opportunistic creep. No wonder you lost your party's nomination the first time you had a real challenge.

If you want an example of posthumous commercializing as it's meant to be done, check out Yul "The King & I" Brynner's anti-smoking spot, released after the bald-pated thespian shuffled off his mortal coil due to lung cancer and absolutely carcinogenic reviews of the short-lived muscial based on The Odyssey, Home Sweet Homer:

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  1. Even the dead know that the people of Alaska need representation by enlightened heiress.

    1. And they intend to vote that way!

  2. Alaska: Maine of the west. You’d think a backwater jerkweed state like that would just stay out of the way and do its own thing, but no, they want to get as much graft as they can.

    1. Your “edgy hate” act has grown stale. Time for a reset.

      1. You don’t get to decide shit, anonypussy. If you could outgrow your passive aggressive cowardice, maybe you could be taken slightly seriously.

        1. But I have decided. You are ineffectual and irrelevant.

          1. Yet for some reason you really, really seem to care. I’m flattered, anonypussy.

            1. It’s so precious how you keep struggling.

              1. Concern Troll has gone stale. Time for a reset.

                1. He needs to sell laptop batteries and check his fly.

  3. …who was chased from office due to criminal charges.

    In Stevens’ defense, all senators should be chased from office due to criminal charges, but he was just one of the few unlucky ones who were.

    1. My only issue with the way Stevens was forced from office is he was innocent of the charges they tried him off. The prosecutor was basically fired for keeping exculpatory evidence from the defense.

      1. The prosecutor was basically fired for keeping exculpatory evidence from the defense.

        I seem to have heard something about that recently.

      2. Withholding exculpatory evidence does not equal innocent of all charges.

  4. Ugh. I prefer to keep track of the “Menage a Troi”-gate invented by the media and the Dems to win the S.C. gubernatural seat… The likelihood of the reasonably attractive Nikki Haley having affairs with two butt-ugly losers (their signed affidavits severely notwithstanding) makes politics on that side of the country more interesting…

  5. “the Robert Byrd of the Yukon”

    Classic.

    “the “Menage a Troi”-gate invented by the media and the Dems to win the S.C. gubernatural seat”

    Didn’t that surface back in the GOP primary, based on allegations from a conservative blogger and a lifetime GOP operative? That’s some media-Dem plot OM!

    1. Re: MNG,

      Didn’t that surface back in the GOP primary, based on allegations from a conservative blogger and a lifetime GOP operative?

      A “lifetime GOP operative“? You read too many Clancy novels, MNG…

      And I am having some fun here, MNG. You take this far too seriously.

  6. I was hoping for zombie Ted Stevens eating brains. I got annoying chick spewing retarded shit.

    Will not do business again.

  7. I wonder if this ad is viewable somewhere in Canada. Maybe they could arrest her for violating those obscenity laws.

  8. Screw all that noise – how cool was Yul Brynner? The dude was a hard-ass mercenary gunslinger, but he also could dance around in baggy silk pants better than M.C. Hammer. And still kick your ass if you made a disparaging comment – et cetera, et cetera, et cetera!

    1. When you can hold your own with Charles Bronson, you’re pretty cool.

    2. I quote him regularly:

      “So let it be written; so let it be done.”

    3. My fave Brynner is still Westworld, “where nothing can go worng…”

      I was a kid when that came out – he made an impression. The orig Terminator, bitches!

    4. I was in Vladivostok visiting the city museum and got gobsmacked by a big display of “King & I” meorabilia. Turns out, Yul was born there, and the city bought out the Franklin Mint’s decorative Brenner collection in tribute.

    5. I have it on good authority that Yul Brynner’s voice in that commercial managed to get 257 women pregnant simultaneously.

  9. It’s amazing what disgusts asshole right-wing hacks like Gillespie. He can swallow the most putrid shit as long as it doesn`t cahllenge his basic market-worshiping assumptions. Watching libertoid dimwits take the tea party cock up the ass–now that’s disgusting.

    1. Why do you give in to your prurient desires if they disgust you? Just don’t watch – DUH!

    2. And if this is spoofing, A++

      1. Suck my cock, you dickless twit.

        1. Max, your homoerotic fantasies are none of our business.

  10. Turn me on, Dead Man!

    Hah, you guys ever try that shit? Sounds pretty damn close. “Paul is dead, miss him, miss him!” is a bit tougher, but you can still get it.

    That Sgt. Pepper, drum-in-the-mirror shit though? Weak. I say Paul survived, but was just badly maimed and brain damaged, hence the vegetarian thing.

  11. I will be very unhappy on election day if that disgusting woman actually wins.

  12. Mel Carnahan actually beat John Ashcroft in a Senate election after he died, so this is nothing.

  13. This blog post is so disrespectful. Senator Stevens clearly wanted Lisa Murkowski to return to the Senate. Senator Murkowski not only showed decency and graciousness in pulling the original ad after Stevens’ death, she then requested Stevens’ family’s approval to show a dignified commercial within a commercial.

    1. Daddy and Uncle Ted say that’s MY seat!

  14. Personally I know a guy is gay when we meet and i feel the need to check my fly~hjrt4r

  15. Stevens isn’t dead, he’s become one with the Tubes…

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