Media

Sharks Attack Missing White Girl at Ground Zero Mosque

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Slate press critic Jack Shafer has uncorked his latest batch of bogus trend stories. My favorite is an AP dispatch, headlined "DOJ report says child porn on the rise," that eventually includes this thesis-undermining quote from the report in question: "The number of offenders accessing the images and videos and the quantity of images and videos being traded is unknown."

While we're on the subject of Shafer, be sure to check out his great debunking of the hysteria over unpaved roads, in which Paul Krugman and Rachel Maddow flip out over 224 miles of gravel.

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46 responses to “Sharks Attack Missing White Girl at Ground Zero Mosque

  1. What Krugman, Maddow, and the press corps don’t understand…

    Whoa, I don’t think I have enough bandwidth for a document that big.

    1. Hey, suck my dick!

  2. Can the title be Juggalos instead of Sharks, please?

    1. I support this change. In fact, there isn’t remotely enough Juggalo hate at H&R.

      1. But they threw water bottles at Tila Tequila! Does that achievement mean nothing?

        1. I don’t think it was water in those bottles…

      2. In fact, there isn’t remotely enough Juggalo hate at H&R.

        “I’m just one man, Marge.”

      3. I’m conflicted. Do I hate them or pity them? I mean, I don’t hate retarded people because they’re mentally handicapped, so I’m not sure if “hate” is the right word to describe my feelings regarding Juggalos.

        1. Loathing? Pity?

          How would you feel if, halfway through eating your beef burgundy, you suddenly found a dead cockroach in it?

          That’s kind of the feeling I have towards ICP and the Juggalos.

          Which makes me wonder why I even bothered capitalizing icp and juggalos.

          1. “Recoiling in disgust is not the same as apathy.”

        2. There’s a difference, though, in that the mentally handicapped aren’t mentally handicapped on purpose.

  3. http://allmaddow.files.wordpress.com/2010/07/aeh6c.jpg?w=472&h=649

    What does the bass roadie for Skid Row have to do with this?

  4. Wife: Have you got anything without mosque?

    Waitress: Well, there’s mosque egg sausage and mosque, that’s not got much mosque in it.

    Wife: I don’t want ANY mosque!

    Man: Why can’t she have egg bacon mosque and sausage?

    Wife: THAT’S got mosque in it!

    Man: Hasn’t got as much mosque in it as mosque egg sausage and mosque, has it?

    Vikings: mosque mosque mosque mosque(crescendo through next few lines)

    Wife: Could you do the egg bacon mosque and sausage without the mosque then?

    Waitress: Urgghh!

    1. Ten demerits for cross-posting.

  5. Likewise, the economy is on the rise.

  6. Shafer is pretty cool, you should get him on some reason.tv bits.

    1. He’s written for us before; it would be great to do more with him. Also, mosque.

      1. They need someone like him in the UK press to skewer the hundreds of phony “human trafficking/sex slavery” stories that constantly proliferate in spit of the facts:

        http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2…..uiry-fails

        http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2…..xaggerated

        1. “spite of the facts”

          ugh

        2. Impossible. For countries that are more or less tolerant to immigration, that is one of the ways in which they can be intolerant to immigration without being called racists.

          1. Actually, you can lay this one at the feet of the feminists. If they can make it seem like prostitutes are slaves, it allows them to avoid the cognitive dissonance associated with limiting a fellow woman’s life choices.

      2. Mosque mosque mosque mosque
        lovely mosque, wonderful mosque!

        1. I didn’t want to be a barber. I wanted to be… an imam!

          1. And I’d float down the mighty Columbia River with my best gal under a burka and I’d sing…Sing… SING…

            1. “Oh, I’m an imam and i eat pears
              D’anjou, bartlet and boscs
              I put on women’s clothing
              And hang around in….”

              what rhymes with boscs ?

  7. Meisterbrau is loose again, huh? Somebody should get right on that.

  8. You know what you never hear about, anymore?

    1. Great white girl sharks?

  9. Best H&R headline ever.

  10. Point of clarification: if we know the white girls are at the Ground Zero Mosque, then they’re no longer missing, right?

    1. I’m on it!

  11. If Stutsman County voters are content to surrender their sparsely driven roads to gravel, why are people like Krugman and Maddow making such a fuss? There’s a preservationist instinct operating here that holds that anything that has been must always be. Also, from their media perches far away, Krugman and Maddow are interpreting the loss of a few miles of Stutsman County road as a sign of the collapse of civilization when all that’s happening is that the country is performing triage on its roads, using its road budget to give the most-used streets the best care.

    I call it the “zookeeper” mentality. People (mostly of the “Progressive” persuasion) for some inexplicable reason seem to think what is, must always be.

    We’d still be living in caves, if they had their way.

    1. To be fair, team redsters suffer from the same mentality about different subjects. Example – in the olden days, according to conservatives, everyone was christian, people had morals, people were hard working, teens didn’t have sex, etc etc.

      1. BLUE! RED! BLUE! RED! BLUE! RED! BLUE! RED! BLUE! RED! BLUE! RED!

      2. The “good old days” theory transcends just conservatives. That theory h as been with us since the beginning of humanity.

        1. Back in the 1050’s we had everything figured out, before those damn Normans ruined everything.

  12. Krugman and Maddow should love the idea of unpaved roads. Think of all the chipped windows in need of repair!!!

  13. Of course they don’t want a mosque in NY, think of all the mosque-itos it would attract.

    Then NY would become just another mosque-ito coast.

    On the other hand, maybe the panic is about all of the mosque-cow-ites that would be attracted.

    Good for creating jobs: Dig up the whole ‘ground-up zero’ site and send it to Lala Land. Then let Arnold worry about the mosquitos.

    Personally, nothing about the Rotten Apple attracts me…but then, I’m not a ‘mosca’…

    Have a good day…

  14. Some currently paved roads don’t have enough traffic on them to justify the cost of keeping them paved.

    Note that the percentage of paved versus unpaved roads is still going up.

    But then, liberal hacks like Krugman don’t seem to grasp economics or cost-benefit analysis, Nobel prize notwithstanding.

  15. liberal hacks like Krugman don’t seem to grasp economics or cost-benefit analysis

    Qualitative judgments are bad, mmmmkay?

  16. People (mostly of the “Progressive” persuasion) for some inexplicable reason seem to think what is, must always be.

    I tend to pin this on the Progressives because of their natural resource and climate policies. The other team does it, too; plenty.

  17. I have a cabin on a lake in Wisconsin. There are two ways to get there. The first is a long paved road that goes by all the seasonal cabins on the lake. The other is to take a shorter gravel road that goes to my section of the shore. On our section are about six full time residents.

    I was talking to them once about why they didn’t finish paving all the way to our part of the lake and they told me that they specifically stopped the local government from doing so because they didn’t want to pay for the upkeep.

    I guess the part time cabin owners on the paved road get hit with a local tax each year to pay for the upkeep while us gravel roaders get off with nothing for the yearly grading of our section of road.

    For once, I am on the right side of tax situation!

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