Environmentalism

Hey Look, the Guy Who Got Momentarily Detained During the Great D.C. Snowball Fight Has Written an Op-Ed in the Washington Post!

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Some pure comments-bait to tie you over into the holiday:

An important Dominican Republic politician. No really, he is!

In my day job, I analyze policies designed to strengthen environmental laws in developing countries. In this work, one quickly learns that the law is perfectly meaningless without someone to enforce it. A partner from the Dominican Republic once held up his country's environmental statute and declared, "This law is perfect; it is a beautiful law. But it does not protect the environment." Without resources for enforcement or a government to take a particular law seriously, the exercise of passing it is largely futile. In my crime-riddled neighborhood of Columbia Heights, the importance of law enforcement is viscerally felt.

Wait, what does this even mean?

I suspect that many of the snowballers were, like me, young, well educated and politically active. Demographics suggest that a strong majority of them support new laws on climate change and health care. It was no accident that the detective's vehicle, a gas-guzzling Hummer, was targeted for snowballing. But this same demographic is acculturated to hostility against police—those who ultimately enforce the laws we fight to get passed. While there was no justification for the detective to display his firearm, the police handled the situation thereafter as well as they could have. Nonetheless, the tone of the crowd quickly shifted from anger at the gun-wielder to generalized anti-authority rhetoric. One woman yelled that the police had "ruined Christmas."

This album cover is being presented as mildly ironic commentary on the circular reasoning in the paragraph to the left, NOT as an excuse for you people to be all, "No really, Steely Dan was the most underrated band of the '70s." LET ME BE CLEAR: STEELY DAN WAS NOT THE MOST UNDERRATED BAND OF THE '70S

Sovereignty, it is said, is a monopoly on the lawful exercise of force. Perhaps such a belief lay behind the detective's decision to pull his gun in response to snowballs. A better definition, one that will carry us much further in the century ahead, is: the capacity and willingness to enforce the rule of law on all members of society. That means respecting the power of the police to break up a snowball fight at a busy intersection (and detain those, like myself, who they have reason to believe are subverting that authority). But it also means disciplinary consequences for those who abuse the sacred trust bestowed on them, as the detective clearly had, though I hope his career isn't upended for this overreaction.

Never forget!

NEXT: Nazis, Commies, and Death Panels

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  1. I am as anti-cop as anyone on here. But, frankly if the snowball throwers were “young, well educated and politically active. Demographics suggest that a strong majority of them support new laws on climate change and health care. It was no accident that the detective’s vehicle, a gas-guzzling Hummer, was targeted for snowballing”, the cop should have fucking shot the little bastards.

    1. Good thing your morals are expandable.

      1. DOH, truly the liberal media is behind my Faux paus.

      2. Go thing you are retarded and have no sense of humor or understanding of sarcasm.

      3. Isn’t MNG short for male anal rape in Steve Smith’s native tongue?

        1. The correct pronunciation is more like MMMMUHHHH NNNNNNUHHHHH GARRRRR, but you’re close.

    2. Doesn’t that make this a hate crime?

      1. Don’t be ridiculous. Throwing snowballs is just a little prank. I suppose if a bunch of skinheads went around throwing snowballs exclusively at black people, that would be a hate crime too, right?

  2. I was waiting for the Hummer Hate to rear its head.

    1. I love hummers. Especially when she’s been drinkin’.

      1. Ba bum bum. Chhh!

        1. MORE COWBELL!!!

    2. It’s okay if we’re talking about the GM-produced “Hummers”. Those were just glorified Suburbans and whatnot.

      The ORIGINAL Hummer, now, that’s the shit to drive.

  3. Love that Beatles spoof. Way better than the original picture, btw.

    1. The Beatles spoof kicks ass.

  4. The Steely Dan alt-text was too long to read in the time it was up. That reminds me, they were the most underrated band of the 70s.

    1. They were great, but also really well loved. Not sure they qualify as underrated.

      1. Steely Dan are correctly rated, as A++++++++++ buyer would do business with again.

      1. When questioned by his supervisor, Detective Baylor stated that he had just gotten out of the Matt Welch seminar on measured response.

    2. Steely Dan is almost up there with Air Supply.

      1. Yeah, Air Supply lyrics were just laden with overtones of unrequited incest and running drug labs and smoking the fine Colombian…

  5. I am as anti-cop as anyone on here.

    Except me. But I hate cops as a subset of Whitey, and this guy’s so Whitey, he’s like a whole shift of cops. And that’s why he didn’t get plugged. Pig recognize pig.

    1. Chinatown is whitey central these days. Back in the day it was home to a working class neighborhood. But they built the Verizon Center and moved all of the working class people out so that the “young, well educated and politically active” could live there.

      First, a bunch of black kids in the hood wouldn’t have been stupid enough to throw snowballs at a cop. Only a certain kind of privileged white person is capable of that kind of stupidity. But if some black kids had, the cop probably would have plugged them and no one would have cared. Sad but true.

      1. Uh, did you watch the video?

        About 30 seconds into it, after the cop has his gun drawn, a black kid nails him with a snowball.

        That kid deserves a medal.

        1. I believe John said “black kids in the hood”. ie, a black guy dressed like The Fourth Doctor does not count.

  6. So its OK to pelt a guy’s car with snowballs if its a Hummer…but its also not-so-bad when the guy pulls a gun on you for doing so because he’s a cop!? What tortured logic is (if there’s any logic at all) at work here? What a fucktard.

    So, if the guy was driving a Prius they wouldn’t have thrown the snowballs? And if they had, would the cop have been justified in shooting them if he was driving since he was driving a Prius?

  7. So, if the guy was driving a Prius they wouldn’t have thrown the snowballs?

    No, they would have ran out and carried him and the car over their heads like the MVP of a big game. Then showered him, bukkake-style.

  8. So Hipsters > Hummers, unless Hummer = Cop then Hipster =/= Hummers?

    …or am I thinking to much and the Hipster basically admitted that he needs such enforcers of state authority to see his policies implemented?

    1. Hipster beats hummer, hummer beats cop, cop beats hipster.

      It’s like rock-paper-scissors.

      1. Where does the lizard and Spock fit in there?

      2. cop beats hipster

        That’s a headline I’d love to wake up to.

  9. Ha, ha. They’re not anti-authority, they just don’t think the laws apply to them. See also: Al Gore’s watt-sucking mansion.

    1. They don’t think the laws shouldn’t apply to them. They know the laws don’t apply to them. They are young, educated, and politically active afterall. Laws are for little people.

      1. So are cops waving guns.

        1. Detective Baylor is learning that isn’t the case at present, and justly so.

  10. Any major dude with half a heart feels for the officer, who is now really just a shadow of the man that I once knew. Klaus and the Rooster will back me on this.

    1. Would you care to explain? In particular, who is this “Gaucho,” amigo?

  11. The server squirrels ate my comment. It was good.

    I would like to note that the idiot who hit the detective with a snowball – on the side of the head — was black. And wisely did not heckle and harass the cop like the white kids did.

    1. I would like to note that the idiot who hit the detective with a snowball – on the side of the head — was black.

      From the look of the white ppl in that crowd i am pretty sure they had a hard time hitting the wide side of that hummer.

      Of course it was a black guy. Lefty urban whites can’t pitch.

      1. A side effect of being politically active and educated I am sure. Not many 1st round picks for any sport coming out of the Ivy League. BOOM!

      2. Dude, you don’t want your lefty urban a-hole pitching against a righty cop a-hole! Basic baseball.

        You always want to pitch a righty with a righty.

  12. In this work, one quickly learns that the law is perfectly meaningless without someone to enforce it.

    I never knew there was such a thing as a law-and-order hippy.

    I wonder if it ever occurred to him that a law which nobody obeys probably should never have been written.

  13. “I suspect that many of the snowballers were, like me, young, well educated and politically active.”

    That’s gay code, right?

    1. rofl – just laughed /coughed up diet pepsi all over my keyboard.

  14. I thought Stockholm Syndrome had been debunked.

    1. Seriously? Anyone really ever try to debunk that theory?

      1. Stop shilling for Big Stockholm already.

  15. Without resources for enforcement or a government to take a particular law seriously, the exercise of passing it is largely futile.

    I am seriously beginning to detest this asshole. What a disgusting little authoritarian cocksucker.

    1. This was the left’s argument for increasing regulations on a shoreline committee i was on. The current regulations were not being enforced so we need tougher regulations.

      Someone actually pointed this out in committee but it really made no difference. The state’s Department of Ecology had the county’s balls in a sling legally. We were getting more stringent regulations no matter what we said.

    2. Yes, what a bizarre left wing thought — if the legislature passes a law, and the executive fails to enforce it, the act of passing it was pointless.

    3. I read the op-ed this AM and had the same thought, more or less.

      I suddenly found myself rooting for the cop, which I might add, took a fuckload of asshatted, smug demands for subservience on Mr. Snowball’s part.

      1. It is interesting that when this story first popped up, everyone was aghast at the overreaction of the cop.

        After a few days of listening to people in the crowd, people are still aghast at the actions of the cop – because he didn’t shoot or beat any of them.

        You wonder if any of the retards in the crowd are self aware enough to notice that the more they talk, the more people side with the cop.

  16. God I’m glad I’m not a liberal, otherwise I might believe in the legitimacy of the concept of a “generation” and then be ashamed to be a part of the same one as the idiot writing this editorial.

  17. The cops should had cleaned that whole street corner off. Good riddance to trash. It would be good comedy to see a bunch of uppity assholes try to laugh that one off.

    1. Thank god that the cop didn’t plug a bunch of them. Not that I think that losing a bunch of those jerks would have been a big loss, but the long term consequences would have been devastating.

      If that cop had killed 6 of those hippies, every hipster in the country would begin every one of their stories with “When the cop started shooting at us I was grazed in the <insert body part with old scar from tap dancing school>. You don’t know what it is like when The Man? decides to start oppressing you.”

      It is already excruciatingly painful to talk to these hippies now. If they can play the part of a martyr too, their smugness quotient will reach unheard of heights.

  18. Trolling your own readership for page views? That’s pretty low.

  19. White left leaning politically active throw snowballs at black man’s H2…

    It really is to bad the cop pulled a gun. Of course we never would have heard about this overt display of racism and classism by young left wingers if he had not.

    Maybe the cops actions were more Meta then we realize?

    Nah, to much to hope for.

  20. Just because a swarm of “educated” east coast pussies (who pretend to be secret radicals for the environment or baby animals or whatever) infest dc streets is not a sufficient excuse to condone some trigger happy cop going ape.

    For me, the true meaning of christmas is tossing a snowball (or brick, or dry ice bomb) at the pigs.

    1. trigger happy cop going ape

      Ape? Heh.

    2. Racist!

    3. The fact that he didn’t shoot means he wasn’t “trigger happy” by definition.

  21. The correct response to such an unruly mob of ne’er do wells is to come back by at a higher rate of speed, lose control in the snow and drive your big-ass hummer into the crowd. Then it’s just an accident caused by an act of God. No need to be a power hungry gun totin cop. payback’s a mother fucker sometimes.

    1. It works better when you’re a cop, since you’ll have the union’s unjust interference to protect against the unjust actions of the mob who want to blame someone other than the people responsible.

      1. Blame the snowballs for blocking your vision.

        “In my field of view, all the pasty-white yuppies just blended in with the snowballs as I lost control your Honor, until the color red started splashing on my windshield.”

  22. In my day job, I analyze policies designed to strengthen environmental laws in developing countries.

    Det. Baylor should have opened fire.

    Kidding! Kidding! Ouch! Kidding!

    1. So he does missionary work…

    2. Yeah, that was pretty much my thought, Tim. Why does he hate poor foreigners so much?

    3. Steal my line why don’t you. Maybe not shot the smug little bastard, but tazered him.

      1. Looking at the cop and envisioning the physiology of the guy who wrote the op-ed, the cop shoulda just flat-out beat his white ass down old-skool like. No weaponry needed.

    4. I think the third world sweatshop workers making 70 cents a day — who will lose their jobs and have to go back to digging holes in the ground for 20 cents a day if this dude got his wish — would gladly pull the trigger.

  23. any major dude could explain to you the pretzel logic necessary in denying the greatness of Steely Dan.

    I’m off to chase the dragon.

  24. I suspect that many of the snowballers were, like me, young, well educated and politically active. Demographics suggest that a strong majority of them support new laws on climate change and health care.
    And
    But this same demographic is acculturated to hostility against police — those who ultimately enforce the laws we fight to get passed.

    Wow. Talk about a cognitive disconnect.

  25. Was it really all that hard to just keep driving. So people throw snowballs at your car. I haven’t heard of the major problem this is, despite being done virtually every time cars and snowballs occur in proximity to one another. We always did this as kids whenever it snowed. Only the idiots stopped and confronted you. Everyone else just continued on to the liquor store and was home buzzing in front of the fire while the idiots were buzzy chasing us around the neighborhood. We would all be happier if we just let crap like this slide. Or you could pull a gun, if you got nothing better to do at the moment. Cop was stupid. Now he will pay and the kids have a story to tell.

    1. True. Was it really that hard to

      A) Either not throw snowballs at passing vehicles or throw them in a park or something or

      B) Keep driving when your shit gets hit with a snowball

      ?

    2. Is it really that hard not to throw snowballs at strangers? It is one thing to get in a snowball fight with friends. But to throw snowballs at cars is just assinine.

  26. Cops: Federal program to bailout the donut industry.

  27. Any DC resident who self describes as “young, well-educated and politically active” needs to be punched and hard.

    1. Yeah, I’m pretty biased against people who describe themselves that way.

    2. Punched and kicked in the dick. Regularly.

      Because you *know* this little anal weepage will be pulling down 6-large shortly, if he doesn’t already, all pimping for the “public good.”

    3. I don’t have a problem with “young” or “politically active”. The “well-educated” needs to go; in many cases it would be satisfactorily replaced with “long-educated”.

  28. When is the summit at the White House?

    It looks like it is time for another teaching moment from Obama about how we can bridge the gaps between Black/White, Cop/Oppressed.

  29. I had a sneaking suspicion the snowball crowd was made up of the same types that gather for dance-protests of John Mackey in Whole Foods.

  30. That was great throw to hit the cop in the head. I doubt those people were in favor of carbon taxes. Most people know that is bullshit.

  31. “I suspect that many of the snowballers were, like me, young, well indroctrinated and politically naive.”

    FTFY

    you self important little prig

  32. In my day job, I analyze policies designed to strengthen environmental laws in developing countries.

    Otherwise known as a bum.

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