The Book of Lists

- Focus lists 51 things you aren't allowed to see on Google Maps.

- Cracked lays out six kooky theories about the apocalypse to come in 2012.

- Foreign Policy picks 10 films to help Westerners understand Iran. I've only seen one of them -- Mohsen Makhmalbaf's Gabbeh -- and in that case, at least, I can second the recommendation.

- And here in the greater Baltimore area, the Towson University outlet WTMD-FM is counting down the 897 greatest musical artists, as voted by the station's listeners. The eclecticism is enjoyable, and the rankings are…entertaining. "Weird Al" Yankovic came in 10 spots ahead of Duke Ellington, and Duran Duran finished five spots above Beethoven.

Comments

[J sub D]

And here in the greater Baltimore area, the Towson University outlet WTMD-FM is counting down the 897 greatest musical artists, as voted by the station's listeners. [italics added]

Did not peruse the entire list but this caught my eye right off the bat.

886. Procol Harum
814. William Shatner

I'd like to point out that these folks are also allowed to vote in city, county, state and national elections.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

[J sub D]

One of the mysteries of life is how in the hell did the people at Cracked, a lame ripoff of the far superior Mad Magazine, end up creating one of the most cynical, skeptical and funniest sites on the intertubez?

[Episiarch]

Weird Al is a fucking genius, Jesse, and I say that with all seriousness.

[Freewheelin Franklin]

And here in the greater Baltimore area, the Towson University outlet WTMD-FM is counting down the 897 greatest musical artists, as voted by the station's listeners.

Damn, I wish i could find the list from UPenn's WXPN from a few years ago. Why 897? Is that their freq, 89.7? How original. XPN's was 885. They also did the 885 top songs, 885 top albums .... and the top ten reasons why Sarah Palin visited NYC, or whatever the fuck it was. I'm not embarrassed, I'll knock up her 14 year old daughter. Hell, I'll take on all three. The Mom and the two daughters. But I digress.

[Freewheelin Franklin]

And as far as Todd - We all know Sarah is just a beard. Don't get your panties in an uproar Mr. Palin.

[Jesse Walker]

J sub D: Few if any people involved with the old Cracked are connected to the current version. Basically, a bunch of cynical, skeptical, and funny folks who were already on the intertubez took over the brand name.

Episiarch: I like Weird Al. He is not a genius.

Franklin: Yes, they're at 89.7 FM.

[Xeones]

Duran Duran finished five spots above Beethoven.

Well, yeah. Duran Duran owns that brooding deaf Kraut bastard.

He is not a genius.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, Jesse, it's just that yours is wrong.

[J sub D]

J sub D: Few if any people involved with the old Cracked are connected to the current version. Basically, a bunch of cynical, skeptical, and funny folks who were already on the intertubez took over the brand name.

It's like a bunch of crackerjack automotive engineers and savvy businessmen adopted the Yugo brand and started turning out Acuras.

[Syd]

That first site thinks Dick Cheney still lives at Number One Observatory Circle.

Maybe he's hiding out in his underground bunker.

[Shannon Love]

I can't help but think there are investment opportunities in the 2012 hysteria. I believe it is morally wrong to leave money in the hands of people who believe these things. They might hurt themselves with it.

I do wonder why people think the Maya could see thousands of years in the future but never used wheels, made it out of Meso-America or left their descendants with useful info like, "If men with skin the color of maggots, dressed in metal and riding giant deer show up, don't let them sneeze on you, kill them quick and burn their bodies."

[Jesse Walker]

Syd: On closer examination, it looks like Focus reprinted that list from another site, which put it up last year. Hence the anachronism.

[renniejoy]

Duran Duran is playing in Redmond, WA on July 5. They are going to be other places on the West Coast as well.

[mitch]

That first site thinks Dick Cheney still lives at Number One Observatory Circle.

I am not surprised to learn that that wily old Dick Cheney has hid the keys from that lovable [sic] dunderhead Joe Biden!

[Episiarch]

I like Weird Al. He is not a genius.

And to think I used to think you were cool, Jesse.

[P Brooks]

It's like a bunch of crackerjack automotive engineers and savvy businessmen adopted the Yugo brand and started turning out Acuras.

Or maybe as if Penske bought Saturn.

[Trinidad Silva]

I died during this movie, but it was worth it.

[Joel]

Maybe he's hiding out in his underground bunker.

Oh, he is. Wasn't his idea, though: He went down to pack up his porn collection, and some guys in suits and wraparound sunglasses bricked up the door behind him.

Great kidders, those Protection Detail guys. It's vitally important not to piss them off, for one day they won't be protecting you anymore.

[CrackerBarrel]

On "Focus" and Stony Brook University:

I went to Stony Brook. Although it is part of a consortium of universities that operate Brookhaven National Labs, the Labs are not located on the Stony Brook campus. If the aerial photos of the campus ever were blurred or pixeled out, they don't appear to be now. There's a good bit of detail in the aerial photos of the Labs, too. Rye Playland is blurred and pixeled more-- go figure. Maybe that's so no one can locate the fortune telling machine that granted Tom Hanks' wish in "Big?" There are Panoramio photos that show parts of Playland in good detail.

This casts suspicion on the rest of Focus, IMHO.

CrackerBarrel

[Mike Laursen]

"Weird Al" Yankovich came in 10 spots ahead of Duke Ellington, and Duran Duran finished five spots above Beethoven.

This is exactly why we can't let the marketplace go unregulated.

[BakedPenguin]

Blue ?yster Cult < Uriah Heep?
ORly? On what planet?

The real test of the list, though, will be the top five. If it has Prince, we'll know it can be safely discarded.

[BakedPenguin]

I can't comment on the Iranian movie list, other than to say I'm glad it was Kiarostami-free.

Like Prince, massively overrated.

[Mike Laursen]

886. Procol Harum
814. William Shatner

Oh, great, now all I can think of is what it would sound like if Shatner did "Conquistador". Never thought about it before, but Procul Harum was a very Shatneresque band in the first place.

[James Anderson Merritt]

"'Weird Al" Yankovich' came in 10 spots ahead of Duke Ellington..."

I happen to think "Weird Al" (who graduated from Cal Poly's KCPR a year or so before I took to those same airwaves) IS a genius, but even if he is not, I think he is certainly smart enough and pays enough attention to detail to spell YOUR name right, Jesse. Please accord him the same courtesy.

[James Anderson Merritt]

Laursen: Now _I_ want to hear Bill's "Conquistador," or maybe better, "Whiter Shade of Pale." That'd be the Shat, man!

[MaterialMonkee]

The 23rd tune on any best of list should be

Noah23- 14 Carrotz (lyrics by Robert Anton Wilson)

watch here
VVVVVVVVVVVVVV
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9QuvBR25Wo

[grimaldius mensch]

I'm shocked this didn't make it

[MaterialMonkee]

@grimaldius mensch

either you're the bloke singing that song

the bloke who sung that song is paying you to link to it

or I'm getting fucking old

🙂

[Jesse Walker]

I happen to think "Weird Al" (who graduated from Cal Poly's KCPR a year or so before I took to those same airwaves) IS a genius, but even if he is not, I think he is certainly smart enough and pays enough attention to detail to spell YOUR name right, Jesse. Please accord him the same courtesy.

Error fixed. Hey, I never said I was a genius...

[HeadTater]

How the hell are The Butthole Surfers better than Glenn MIller and Janis Joplin?

[ed]

They're not.

[Fascitis Necrotizante]

I just can't understand why Kiarostami gets rated at all. Taste of Cherry made me want to break the DVD but it wasn't mine.

[Syd]

"Weird Al" Yankovich came in 10 spots ahead of Duke Ellington, and Duran Duran finished five spots above Beethoven.

Duke and Ludwig are great but what have they done lately?

[Mike Laursen]

Laursen: Now _I_ want to hear Bill's "Conquistador,"...

He doesn't even have to do the whole song. I just want to hear his dramatic interpretation of the word, conquistador.

[Aresen]

RE: The Focus List

I wasn't aware that Google was deliberately blurring some locations. I just assumed that the White House and Congress were naturally blurry.

[lumpy]

The White House and US Capitol have no be blurred for some time now.

[lumpy]

That is not been blurred.

[PFJ]

The Stone Roses are about 700 spots too low. I know they only released one album, but no way do they deserve to be below Yoko Ono and right around Styx and The Fray and Sonny and Cher.

[Thelonious_Nick]

PFJ, you'll be happy to know that the Stone Roses released two albums, their debut and a second album around 1995 called "Second Coming." Not as good as the first, but not bad, with a harder sound and nods to Zeppelin.

[Ken Goldstein]

He'd probably be happier not to know about Second Coming. Well, Ten Storey Love Song is passable, I guess...

[PFJ]

I was aware of the Second Coming. I guess I forgot the word "good" as in "they only released one good album." Ten Storey Love Song and Love Spreads are the only really songs I would miss if I lost it.