Presidential History

What Do Lawrence of Arabia, Psycho, Star Wars: Episode IV, & 2001: A Space Odyssey Have in Common?

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They're among the 25 unplayable-in-England DVDs that President Barack Obama gave to U.K. Prime Minister Gordon Brown last week. No word yet if the shrink-wrap was still on them.

Here's the full list, courtesy of MTV:

—"2001: A Space Odyssey"
– "Casablanca"
– "Chinatown"
– "Citizen Kane"
– "City Lights"
– "E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial"
– "It's a Wonderful Life"
– "Lawrence of Arabia"
– "On the Waterfront"
– "Psycho"
– "Raging Bull"
– "Schindler's List"
– "Singin' in the Rain"
– "Some Like It Hot"
– "Star Wars: Episode IV"
– "Sunset Boulevard"
– "The General"
– "The Godfather"
– "The Graduate"
– "The Grapes of Wrath"
– "The Searchers"
– "The Wizard of Oz"
– "To Kill a Mockingbird"
– "Vertigo"

You know, in some cultures, cheaping out and not giving the full run of Star Wars is seen as a sign of disrespect. More here.

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  1. Didn’t someone call this last week?

  2. If the smart party were in charge, this sort of thing would never happen

  3. Also, at least Obama didn’t give them copies of HBO’s John Addams or The Patriot…

  4. I also give guests dvds I either don’t watch anymore (porn).

  5. Have you actually SEEN the full run of Star Wars? I’d consider not getting them all a blessing…

  6. I think a new protocol officer is in order. Maybe C3PO is available.

  7. At least he didn’t give him an overcharge, I mean reset button.

  8. Hey! At least it wasn’t a mixed tape.

  9. I swear the administration, past and present, should compensate me for the hours it often requires me to try to explain, not defend, what the morons that represent my country of origin are doing. With the prior administration it was “asshole hour” now it’s “amateur hour.” I can’t win.

    Thank god most people abroad have the common sense not to equate you with the retards running your country, although I have noticed this sentiment is rapidly waning.

  10. You know, in some cultures, cheaping out and not giving the full run of Star Wars is seen as a sign of disrespect.

    In other, more advanced cultures, giving the full run of 6 movies is considered a deadly insult, and just cause for war.

  11. Il Duce also “gave back” the bust of Winston Churchill that was given to the office not very long ago. I heard that they will crate the Statue of Liberty and return it to France, as well.

    You didn’t even mention the very thoughtful gift Michelle Obama gave to Ms. Brown for her kids: models of the Presidential Helicopter that surely came from the White House gift shop.

    Look, I’ve seen Mexican presidents do crazy things whenever representatives from other countries come to visit Mexico, or when they go visit other countries, but surely never EVER have these guys given a gift you can find at Amazon.com

  12. Dello has it. In the culture around here, giving the prequels to Star Wars would be a sign of disrespect. One on the order of saying to someone’s face “You are a tasteless buffoon. Enjoy these crappy movies.”

  13. You know, in some cultures, cheaping out and not giving the full run of Star Wars is seen as a sign of disrespect.

    In advanced cultures, promoting the myths of banking spacecraft, noise traveling through a vacume or noisey light is considered disrespectful to the “smarts” of the recipient.*

    *This statement may have blown the cover to my serious person handle, but it still must be said.

  14. With the prior administration it was “asshole hour” now it’s “amateur hour.” I can’t win.

    This wasn’t amateur hour – even I could think of a tasteful gift for Gordon Brown. This was a clear-cut message to him, from the Arrogant One: We don’t need you [and by “we”, Il Duce means “I”, as in “L’estat C’est Moi”]

  15. Although I do have to give props for City Lights and The General. If you’re going to watch two silent films, those are great choices.

  16. I’d have included only movies that were very subtly insulting to the U.K. Or to the U.S., depending on my mood.

    If I were feeling very warm and fuzzy towards the British, then I’d send movies that were blatantly insulting to the French, our natural enemies.

  17. If it had been the boxed set of ‘Firefly’ then I’d be forced to say nice things about Obama.

  18. Though I do not miss joe, I would love to hear an Obamaton explain this away. Really. Can anyone come up with a reasonable explanation? Can Obama really be this stupid and arrogant, or have staff that are this stupid and arrogant?

  19. Nothing by Spike Lee? What a fucking Uncle Tom.

  20. “Lawrence of Arabia” was supposed to be viewed by the British as a nice movie?

  21. Also, while NTSC DVD’s are a bit of a gaffe, I think Brown can afford a code free DVD player.

  22. I also give guests dvds I…don’t watch anymore (porn).

    You were having me over for tea on Friday, right PAL?

  23. That’s OK, because the wood in the pen Brown gave to Obama was really from the wood recently replaced in his backyard deck.

  24. Epi,

    He is neither stupid nor arrogant. You just do not have the capacity to understand Him.

    How was that?

  25. Il Duce could have been more succinct and chosen more-to-the-point movies like:

    Braveheart
    Zulu Dawn
    The Charge of the Light Brigade
    Rob Roy
    Bannockburn
    John Paul Jones
    George Washington (the miniseries)
    The Swamp Fox (the TV Series with Leslie Nielsen)

  26. Tofu, that clears everything up. Thanks.

  27. The Red Button thing that Hillary pulled was even more embarrassing, considering that this FORMER first lady should have known better than pull that cutesy trick.

  28. wingnutz,

    That would’ve shaken the very roots of the world. He’s probably never even heard of Firefly, unfortunately.

    I gave my dad the series for Christmas. He loved it and went out and bought Serenity on his own. I know he’s into it, because the last time he was in town, he recognized the Blue Sun shirt I was wearing (one of the few geeked-out shirts I own).

    TofuSushi,

    Why not? The British won that English director. Of course, O’Toole is from Ireland (though raised in England).

  29. “Though I do not miss joe, I would love to hear an Obamaton explain this away. Really.”

    Epi–

    Why do you think joe left, after all? It wasn’t because of the monkey cartoon.

  30. In advanced cultures, promoting the myths of banking spacecraft, noise traveling through a vacume or noisey light is considered disrespectful to the “smarts” of the recipient.

    Of course spacecraft bank. It is much less disorienting and provides a more normal G force, allowing better flight characteristics and pilot control. Furthermore, it provides a smooth transition from the aerodynamic atmospheric trainers that most pilots first fly. Only minimally competent civilizations fail to simulate banking in spaceflight.

    As for sounds in space, those are computer generated in multiple dimensions in the cockpit or headphones as the most natural signal for the pilot to pay immediate attention to. The director and sound editor are simply letting the audience in on those sounds to give them a better feel for the pilot’s experience in advanced spaceflight.

    Duh.

  31. Forgot to add:

    The Messenger

    [With Mila Jovovich! About Joanne d’Arc! Many British maimed and killed in that one! Don’t you guys remember???]

  32. Plus, why not at least give him unwatchble Blu-Ray discs?

    Cheap ass.

  33. Pro,

    Because Major Lawrance was doing everything in his power to prevent British Imperial control over Palestine after beating the Turks out of it.

  34. At least in the movie it was shown that way.

  35. Why do you think joe left, after all?

    Oh, I know. But I’d still be fascinated to hear how he (or his ilk) would spin this. Most of the time I can see where the spin will be, but how the hell do you spin this?

    My only guess would be that “it must have been a lazy staffer who has now been fired and Obama never knew what the gifts would be” or something, except that would mean that Obama isn’t overseeing gifts to statesmen of our closest allies. Which is also stupid.

  36. Somehow “the British won that one” and “David Lean was an English director” got merged into one sentence in my last posting. Is that filtering software running totally amok?

    BDB,

    If Obama were cool, he’d have given the Blu-Ray discs along with a Blu-Ray player.

  37. It is much less disorienting and provides a more normal G force, allowing better flight characteristics and pilot control.

    Uh, nice try, Mike, but artificial gravity generators remove all G forces except Earth normal downwards.

    Duh.

  38. I would, too, but he bailed.

    You know at least all the Bushies took the heat here when their side was in charge.

  39. Epi,

    I don’t buy the bumbling staffer story. This was clearly something Il Duce asked: “Let’s get him some cheap DVD set or something. Here, go to Target and put it on the White House card. Oh, and bring back the receipt!”

  40. You guys this is serious. Brown could de-friend Obama on Facebook over this.

  41. calling Poor Old Joe.

    Where are you joe? we need your commentary. we know only you could see through the disguised bigotry of calling out the new POTUS on his gift-giving skills.

  42. TofuSushi,

    That was more fiction than fact, I think.

    You know, what if Obama had given Brown 25 video games? What games should he have given? To keep it simple, let’s make them Xbox360 games. Off the top of my head, I’d borrow one from the movie list–The Godfather. Definitely Fallout 3 and the two Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic. And Grand Theft Auto Whatever Version would be a given, of course.

  43. Obama loves to snub Brown. He had him “waiting around” for a press confrence that never happened. Because of…….SNOW!

    http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/toby_harnden/blog/2009/03/03/barack_obama_cancels_press_conference_with_gordon_brown_because_of_snow

    Yes, this is the same tough guy who wined about having his kids school closed for icy roads.

  44. I’m a little disappointed there was nothing like National Lampoon’s European Vacation

  45. If Obama were cool, he’d have given the Blu-Ray discs along with a Blu-Ray player.

    If I wanted to be REALLY cool, I would have given him a Play Station 3 with a freshly-minted Resident Evil 5 DVD…

    … and the Blu-Ray versions of Braveheart, Zulu Dawn, Rob Roy, John Paul Jones, The Messenger…

  46. At least he didn’t give him cash or a gift card.

  47. FTG –
    Playstations are Japanese!

  48. Sadly a video game system would be unplayable (NTSC vs. PAL) as well.

    You know, if we gotta have a U.N. could they at least have done something useful like implement one global standard for TVs?

  49. Yes, but they are way cool!!! And can play Blu-Ray!

    I want one…

  50. artificial gravity generators remove all G forces except Earth normal downwards.

    What good are snub fighters with artificial gravity?

  51. I would love to hear an Obamaton explain this away.

    GEEEEEOOOOORRRGGGGEEE BUUUUUUSSSSSSSHHHHHHH!!!!!

  52. I’m a little disappointed there was nothing like National Lampoon’s European Vacation

    No Hercules in New York either. What a missed opportunity.

  53. In advanced cultures, promoting the myths of banking spacecraft, noise traveling through a vacume or noisey light is considered disrespectful to the “smarts” of the recipient.*

    That reads very close to my review of the original theatrical release of Star Wars when I was 14.I really hated those movies, well until the Ewoks. Nobody hates Ewoks.They had a great song and an even better made for TV spin-off movie.

  54. “well until the Ewoks. Nobody hates Ewoks.They had a great song and an even better made for TV spin-off movie.”

    I hope that was dripping with sarcasm.

  55. do-da-do-da-do…..YUB! YUB!

  56. Besides, even in capital ships, artificial gravity is one of the greatest power requirements. Of course you use a trivial amount of propulsion to bank in order to reduce the demands on the artificial gravity.

  57. “I would love to hear an Obamaton explain this away.”

    This isn’t this administration’s gift of DVD’s. It’s the gift of DVD’s the previous administration failed to give to Brown last year.

  58. Serious matters like the budget, the bailout, and the business-as-usual, Hugh? C’mon, lighten up! This is fun. Kinda like how Liberals are now showing that their only beef with W was his poor syntax.

    We love Obama’s policies. We just don’t like him because…

  59. This discussion of Star Wars reminds me of this article:

    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SpaceDoesNotWorkThatWay

    Has just about every example of bad space physics in fiction listed.

  60. If he really wanted to insult Brown, he would have sent this.

  61. WHAT, NO PORN? THAT’S AMERICA’S STRONGEST AND BEST EXPORT!

  62. It’s the gift of DVD’s the previous administration failed to give to Brown last year.

    I heard that everybody went bananas (ok, the MSM) when GWB gave GB a leather bomber jacket. In hindsight, that was a VERY thoughtful gift even for Dub-Ya, considering a good quality bomber jacket costs around $800.00 and they make anybody look cool (unless you happen to be a human blob).

    I cannot imagine GB trying to wear his new set of DVDs, though…

  63. Congrats Nit, you came up with the perfect joeism.

  64. do-da-do-da-do…..YUB! YUB!

    I could kill Lucas for cutting the Ewok party scene. Even I never knew there were TWO Ewok made-for-TV movies! I only saw Battle For Endor.

  65. Epi: here’s my best devil’s advocate pro-Obama spin on DVDgate

    If the worst thing that the Republicans can pin on Obama is that he gives lousy diplomatic gifts–which, by law, the prime minister cannot even retain if valued over a certain amount–then Obama must be doing a great job.

    BTW, has anyone brought up that Gordon Brown is almost totally blind due to an old sports injury?

  66. Besides, even in capital ships, artificial gravity is one of the greatest power requirements. Of course you use a trivial amount of propulsion to bank in order to reduce the demands on the artificial gravity.

    Uhh, dilithium crystals provide all the power you need. Banking is also tactically stupid. If your fighter/warship can make a 90/180/whatever degree turn on a dime, you have much more maneuverability.

  67. I suppose he could have given him a Circuit City gift card, or one from Sharper Image?

  68. I don’t buy the bumbling staffer story. This was clearly something Il Duce asked: “Let’s get him some cheap DVD set or something. Here, go to Target and put it on the White House card. Oh, and bring back the receipt!”

    Most of these DVDs can’t be gotten at Target. It’s more likely that Michelle was complaining about all of the unused Best Buy gift cards left over from the inauguration.

  69. Canada gave Obama a list of 49 crappy Canadian songs.

    http://www.cbc.ca/radio2/obamasplaylist/

  70. At least there was no Nickelback on that list, Hoser.

  71. Why do you think joe left, after all?

    Among other reasons, joe left because Reason.com has a decent site search function. He feared that people (you know who you are) would me use it to post,

    I told you[a href=http://www.reason.co.com/xxx”] here[/a] that this was going to occur.

  72. Abdul – I think that’s the most likely answer, yes.

    How about the argument of fiscal responsibility? We just can’t afford as much as we used to.

  73. Abdul, Nittany, those are pretty good.

    I would have loved to have seen the Stormtroopers massacre an entire tribe of Ewoks in retaliation, Einsatzgruppen-style.

  74. Wicket W Warrick,

    Have you never beheld the horror that was The Star Wars Holiday Special?

    It’s NSFS (Not Safe For Sanity).

  75. Since the RESET button thing was mentioned above, can anyone explain that to me assuming it had been translated properly.

    Handing the Russians a red button with reset written on it sounds like we are reseting the cold war to me. Ignoring the translation snafu, I dont think this was properly thought through.

  76. I would have loved to have seen the Stormtroopers massacre an entire tribe of Ewoks in retaliation, Einsatzgruppen-style.

    They tried, but were foiled by a big log swinging on a rope made of braided vines.

  77. If I were Prime Minister Brown, on my next visit I’d give Obama a copy of “Being There”, as we’re now being run by the real-life version of Chauncey Gardiner.

  78. Episiarch,

    It’s hard to believe that no one has created, along the lines of, say, Troops, a video of the stormtroopers slaughtering the Ewoks. I’m generally a Rebellion/Light Side guy, but I think the Empire could be forgiven that “crime.”

  79. ProL

    It wouldn’t hurt if they accidentally killed Jar Jar Binks in the process, either.

  80. joe probably read my posts about how much he posted here and decided to get a real life… Nah, he’s probably just on a cruise somewhere without a broadband connection.

  81. Jar Jar Binks? Who is that? I don’t recognize anyone by that name.

  82. It’s hard to believe that no one has created, along the lines of, say, Troops, a video of the stormtroopers slaughtering the Ewoks.

    No it’s not, because Lucas would sue the shit out of them.

    They tried, but were foiled by a big log swinging on a rope made of braided vines.

    Why didn’t the Empire just burn the whole forest down? Wicket don’t surf, and I love the smell of charred fur in the morning. Smells like hickory.

  83. All this reminds me of this article from the Onion

  84. If your fighter/warship can make a 90/180/whatever degree turn on a dime, you have much more maneuverability.

    Well, with dilithium crystals, sure you can do that. The Empire doesn’t seem to have dilithium crystals, though, their having been invented not such a long time ago in a galaxy not so far away.

  85. Moose, I have a photoshop from a contest where it’s a package of hamburger meat but you can see the remnants of Jar Jar’s face in it. Hilarious, but unfortunately it’s at home and I’m at work.

  86. Episiarch,

    Produced anonymously, of course. Overseas. In a bunker.

    Look, the man’s reach must end somewhere. After all, The Star Wars Christmas Special still pops up on Youtube and elsewhere, despite his vow to kill anyone who has even seen, let alone distributed, that horror of horrors.

  87. The Ewoks made the potential sequels (vols. 7-9) pointless (how do you believe any jeopardy from the Empire when a bunch of Teddy Ruxpin dolls kick the crap out of them?) Of course, the quality of the prequels made the idea of the sequels a moot point in any event.

  88. The construction that…

    ***SPOILER***

    …Darth Vader is Luke’s father pretty much made everything beyond the original trilogy pointless.

  89. I have it on good authority that it’s all Rush Limbaugh’s fault.

  90. I liked Luke saving his father. Nice redemption myth stuff. But now that I know his father better, I think Luke should’ve just killed him as soon as possible.

  91. Canada gave Obama a list of 49 crappy Canadian songs.

    They’re not all crappy, ya hoser. Although i’m not sure how wonderful “One Great City!” is for Canadian pride, being that it’s about how much Winnipeg sucks.

  92. Stay classy, Mr. President!

  93. Didn’t you guys hear? Obama was TIRED! He simply forgot the whole gift thing until the last minute, and the only thing open was the Wal Mart down the street.

  94. Did X just out himself as a maple-sucker, hoser, Eh-hole, 51st Stater, frostback, iceback, moosefucker, snowback, or puckhead?

  95. moosefucker

    *slowly backs away from Xeones*

  96. I haven’t read all of the comments, but I am I the only one who really doesn’t mind the Prez going cheap on the (presumably taxpayer-funded) symbolic gifts to other heads of state?

    I realize it’s a drop in the ocean, but you know, it’s the thought that counts sometimes…

  97. B

    Dat you, joe?

  98. B, I think the problem is the lack of thought, since Region 1 DVDs won’t play on Region 2 machines.

    He basically just gave GB a useless pile of shiny plastic.

  99. If I was Gordon Brown I would turn around and sell the lot of them on Ebay. I bet it would bring a pretty penny.

  100. Hey, GB can make a wind chime. That’ll look pretty hanging out front of ol’ #10.

  101. Shiny plastic has value as long as you believe it does!!!

  102. J sub D,

    Your xxx URL did not work when I clicked on it. Can you retype it? I am at work and want to check it out.

  103. Uhh, dilithium crystals provide all the power you need. Banking is also tactically stupid. If your fighter/warship can make a 90/180/whatever degree turn on a dime, you have much more maneuverability.

    Keyboard turning sucks.

  104. At least there was no Nickelback on that list, Hoser.

    They also refrained from any Celine or Shania. And had the good sense to include both Arcade Fire AND Stompin’ Tom. I, for one, think Canadians deserve at least partial credit.

  105. Did they include Triumph? That is, the other three-man Canadian band?

  106. What would be awesome would be if Mr. Brown re-gifts them on his next state visit to Washington.

  107. I wonder what a Prime Minister Shatner would give?

  108. Sure it’s retarded, but think of the money that he could have dropped on some other exotic, useless gift. If our great leader is required to spend taxpayer money on gifts, I say that DVD sets are the way to go.

    You know, it shows that he’s committed to reducing wasteful spending. *cough*

  109. A Reader’s Digest Koran or maybe a personal surveillance camera would have been thoughtful alternatives. For the kids that PlaySkool Airport Screening mock-up that was posted a while back on hit-n-run.

  110. I wonder what a Prime Minister Shatner would give?

    The White House has already asked him to stop sending them all-Shatner playlists, so that’s out.

  111. This could have been solved by using the Omega-13 device.

  112. Did X just out himself as a maple-sucker etc.

    Hey, Canadians came up with some decent bands during that hockey strike a couple years ago when they didn’t have anything else to do. The Arcade Fire is also good, although they probably shouldn’t count because the lead singer is from Texas.

    And Epi, if you ever accuse me of being Canadian again, i will find you and burn down your life.

  113. Or one of these…only $19.95

    http://www.obamapens.tv/?iorb=4764

    As seen on TV!

  114. This could have been solved by using the Omega-13 device.

    Corbomite, dudez.

    And Epi, if you ever accuse me of being Canadian again, i will find you and burn down your life.

    You’re very touchy about this. Are you half-Canadian or something? Some kind of hybrid freak?

  115. Come on, people! If the prime minister of what once was the British Empire doesn’t have access to a freakin’ region-free DVD player, what’s the point of the job?

  116. I’m a fan of them on one level, but on another level I get really tired of their pompousness … We’ve played some shows with them and they really treat people like shit. Whenever I’ve been around them, I’ve found that they not only treated their crew like shit, they treated the audience like shit. They treated everybody in their vicinity like shit. I thought, ‘Who do they think they are?’ I don’t know why people put up with it. I wouldn’t put up with it. I don’t care if it’s Arcade Fire or Brian Eno. If either of them walked into a room and treated people like shit I’d be like, ‘Fuck you, get outta here.’
    … People treat Arcade Fire like they’re the greatest thing ever and they get away with it. Those sort of opinions change my view of their music. They have good tunes, but they’re pricks, so fuck ’em. Who does Arcade Fire think they are? I’ve been around groups. I’ve been around the Edge from U2 and he’s the fucking sweetest guy ever. I was around Justin Timberlake when he was young and he was just a normal, nice, kind person. Anyone can be polite and kind and people who have the privilege and money and attention should understand that. If they don’t, then fuck ’em.

  117. “Common People.” And that Twilight Zone episode on the plane.

  118. Cheap? And hacking off a little chunk of an old boat they had laying around and whittling it into a PEN HOLDER wasn’t cheap?

    I mean, seriously…

  119. Oh, and to add to the insult, “2001” was filmed primarily in the UK (everything except some location shots in Monument Valley, according to IMDB), directed by US-born expat Stanley Kubrick who moved to England in 1962 (“2001” was made in 1968), written by Arthur C. Clarke who was a brit.

    LOLz.

  120. Well, at least they weren’t Laserdisc.

  121. Buffy,

    If they were Laserdisk maybe the PM could watch them.

  122. I like their music, Wayne, not hanging out with them. By the way, thanks for the free laser pointer at that one show!

  123. Tonio,

    And Clarke ditched the UK for Sri Lanka (where he lived until his recent death) eons ago.

  124. “Lawrence of Arabia,” “Psycho,” “Vertigo,” and “City Lights” were all — while released by Hollywood studios — made by British filmmakers. It’s not quite ironic, but nonetheless worth noting.

  125. Somehow Obama and the Obama administration are so retarded that they have managed to get the State Department to forget how to translate Russian!

    Is there anything that these people are good at? Oh, yeah, one thing: finding tax cheats.

  126. Honestly, Obama is making Bush look like a super-genius.

  127. Why didn’t the Empire just burn the whole forest down? Wicket don’t surf, and I love the smell of charred fur in the morning. Smells like hickory.

    Episiarch, I find your ideas intriguing and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

  128. Why not place the shield generator on the Death Star, so that you could blow up Endor right away?

    The story was originally supposed to be set on the Planet of the Wookies. Okay, maybe I can buy armed Wookies beating stormtroopers.

  129. His goodwill gift to the Israeli PM should be The Passion of the Christ.

  130. Ewoks suck.

  131. They only suck when they need the money, or you have peanut butter.

  132. The Ewoks didn’t (and didn’t have to) beat the stormtroopers. They just had to distract them so that the Rebels got into the shield generator.

    If you ask me, the Imperial commanders were idiots to even bother chasing the Ewoks into the forest, especially before the real threat, the Rebels, were killed or transfered to a more secure location. Kind of a prophecy of our War on Terror policy I’m afraid.

  133. Are you suggesting that bin Laden is an Ewok? That could explain his close relationship with a Muppet.

  134. The major successes the Ewoks had in the battle were entirely believable — smashing an Imperial walker between two tree trunks, and “tripping” another by rolling logs beneath it. Of course, what’s unbelievable is that an omnipotent pan-Galactic Empire would use such stupid armored vehicles to begin with. Remind me again what tactical advantage is gained by putting a tank on wobbly legs?

  135. ProL, one man’s terrorist is another man’s cuddly furball.

  136. If al Qaeda is actually a group of Ewoks, maybe I’m more in favor of the War on Terror than I originally thought.

  137. Well the main difference is that the Ewoks are much more lax in their diet. Bin Laden would never prepare a Wookie for supper, would he?

  138. Consider Watto if you want to further underline the ‘ignorant design’ of Mr Lucas’s heap-of-shit creations.

    Unless his belly is full of helium, his mass would land him flat on his ass even if those vestigial wings flapped faster that a hummingbird’s.

  139. The major successes the Ewoks had in the battle were entirely believable…

    Yeah, um…ok. Apparently, the Empire has some weak ass metal. And the fact that a group of dolls armed with pointed sticks had fewer casualties than an heavily armed group of soldiers is also really believable.

    I was thirteen when I first saw that shit, and I didn’t believe it then.

  140. His Goodwill gift to the Israeli PM will be a bagel with sesame seeds arranged to look like the Virgin.

    Or a DVD set of “Shoah” for the Pope.

  141. I was thirteen when I first saw that shit, and I didn’t believe it then.

    er… “didn’t think it was plausible then”

  142. The Prime Minister of the UK can’t get an all-region DVD player?

  143. I know Hollywood films are viewed as being so much a part of our country’s identity, but when you really flyspeck the list of films, it isn’t really well chosen as a piece of Americana. 2001 was shot in England by an American filmmaker that spent the last four decades of his life living in England. Eight of the films were directed by men that emigrated to the US for the film industry (not counting Capra). Star Wars was mostly shot in Tunisia and England. Schindler’s List was shot in Poland. Lawrence of Arabia in Northern Africa. Forget the homes of the actors or the settings of the stories. I’m not trying to say that these films are not American, but rather that when Gordon Brown pops Lawrence of Arabia into the DVD player, I do not think he’ll be reminded of America as he watches.

  144. BP,

    You were right the first time. I don’t believe it, either. I think the remaining Jedi fled to Endor and trained a bunch of human kids, then put them in costumes. I mean, they looked like kids in costumes to me.

  145. ProL

    Midgets
    Child labor laws in Hollywood are really rent-seeking by midgets.

  146. I personally think that after the ending credits, the Ewoks ate them all.

  147. Say, maybe the Ewoks were zombies led by Bruce Campbell? That would reconfigure my whole notion of Ewoks. “Stormtrooper braaaiins.”

  148. PL, agreed – your original scenario makes more sense. I can’t believe Bruce Campbell would have anything to do with Ewoks.

    Syd – I’ve asked that question twice already.

  149. BP,

    Yes, clearly, Campbell would never have played such a prominent role in ROTJ if the Ewoks were, in fact, non-undead furry midgets. I mean, come on!

  150. Nothing can make Ewoks not lame. Nothing.

  151. What if we CGIed them into hot, Amazon women? Armed with light sabers?

  152. What if we CGIed them into hot, Amazon women? Armed with light sabers?

    There’s some re-imagining I can live with…

  153. What if we CGIed them into hot, Amazon women? Armed with light sabers?

    Double-headed light sabers? With “special effects”? I think you may be onto something.

    I was thirteen when I first saw that shit, and I didn’t believe it then.

    er… “didn’t think it was plausible then”

    C’mon, it’s no less plausible than the chariot chase scene from History of the World, Part 1. Actually, never mind that. A giant Roman doobie is definitely more plausible.

  154. Ewoks are copyright infringement on Chinese-made Shih Tzus. You can’t make an Shih Tzu purse out of an Ewok’s ear.

  155. crimethink,

    Giant robots are inherently superior to tanks. I thought everybody knew that?

    I mean tanks are over twicw as likely to take a critical hit and are very vulnerable to napalm rounds. It just too obvious.

  156. No doubt it will be the version of E.T. that Spielberg removed the guns from!
    Pathetic on both counts.

  157. Since Obama is acting in such a trashy manner, it would have been more appropriate to give DVD’s like:

    Tobacco Road
    The Beverly Hillbillies
    God’s Little Acre
    Li’l Abner
    Barfly
    How I Became A Sleazy, manipulative, Racist President (not yet a movie)

  158. What? No Porky’s???

  159. Did you guys not catch the Star Wars connection? Episode IV is titled “A New Hope”.

    What better way to reach out to a foreign diplomat and dispel the cocky American stereotype than giving a gift that’s more about you than them? What a prick.

  160. With many new announcement about the wizard of oz movies in the news, you might want to consider starting to obtain Wizard of Oz book series either as collectible or investment at RareOzBooks.com.

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