Ron Paul

A Video Poem from the Last Days of the Republic (Ron Paul Flyover Edition)

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Watch, weep, laugh:

Over the skies of St. Paul, Minnesota/
There flew the banner of freedom/
High above where freedom was being destroyed/
By a Republican Party that cares more about/
Fascism/
Than it does about the rights of individual citizens/
To buy their marijuana with gold coins

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  1. pretty good, but try to rework that into a haiku

  2. Is that Matt Welch?

  3. It could use some Renaissance-y lute playing in the background, and should be sung in minstrel-like fashion.

  4. I find it interesting that Palin mentioned the Constitution exactly once in her speech – when she ridiculed Due Process.

    (that “fascism” line reminded me of her “core” values)

  5. I can’t WTFV, but is that thing as off-meter as it looks? Was it written by Marianne Moore?

  6. is that thing as off-meter as it looks?

    Yup. Hence the minstrel/lute thing. I figured they could whip it into some kind of iambic tetrameter or something.

  7. I figured they could whip it into some kind of iambic tetrameter or something.

    I seriously doubt there’s any meter you could force it into. You know what would make it work? Some good acid.

  8. Some good acid.

    That would make the whole election season much more bearable. Best idea evar!

  9. I just assumed the text was a joke, Nick making fun of the real poem.

  10. I wrote this inspired by an old pro-JFK novelty song, imagining a Jimmy Durante voice singing it.

    Ron Paul for President
    What he says is what he means
    Ron Paul for President
    He’ll sweep this country clean

    He’ll kick out the old UN
    And keep us out of wars
    The income tax will see an end
    And we’ll legalize drugs and whores

    With Walter Williams as his running mate
    We’ll get back our fair share
    And with old Rockwell at Department of State
    We can thumb our nose at world affairs

    No more bailouts of the banks
    He’ll give your tax money back to you
    So you can buy a Sherman tank
    Or build a castle too

    Ron Paul for President
    He’s real nice, not mean
    Ron Paul for President
    He’ll swee-eep this count-ry clean!

  11. Best idea evar!

    Then it’s settled. Acid for some, miniature psilocybin mushrooms for others!

  12. Mushrooms please. I couldn’t handle a 14 hour trip at this stage of my life.

    PS – They’re still legal in Amsterdam contrary to what many people had told me.

  13. ron paul was the last
    candidate who would have let
    pot bought with gold coins

  14. Tom Walls gets the statue. Thread Winner.

    Pig, an honorable mention.

  15. Acid already
    must have been put in our food.
    Why else John McCain?
    JMR

  16. a bluebird warbles
    aloft fallen republics,
    the desert winds howl

  17. Shrike: I find it interesting that Palin mentioned the Constitution exactly once in her speech – when she ridiculed Due Process.

    And I find it telling that of all the applause lines in Obama’s speech, his weak, tepid mention of withdrawing from Iraq drew only a few claps. Those idiot anarchists in Minneapolis – who don’t even know WHY they’re mad or WHAT they’re protesting — would have done well to break a couple windows in Denver instead.

  18. Brilliant Parody.

    I like how it uses the word freedom twice, as though the author lacks the vocabulary to come up with a variation.

  19. Thanks, Commonsewer.

    Buying pot with krugerrands, what a thought!

  20. “By a Republican Party that cares more about/
    Fascism/
    Than it does about the rights of individual citizens/
    To buy their marijuana with gold coins.”

    Proof, once again, that the word Fascism is the most wrongly overused word in the English language.

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