Campaigns/Elections

Starved of Attractive Candidates, Conservative Goes Mad….

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….as Townhall.com director of operations Matt Lewis, writing in the Politico, declares that Newt Gingrich is "the only Republican presidential candidate, declared or otherwise, who has the potential to be romantic. Other people give speeches; when Newt speaks, the words have music. He's poetic. He's quixotic. He's … dangerous" and the clear choice for a right-wingy voter chafing to "rebel."

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  1. “Other people give speeches; when Newt speaks, the words have music. He’s poetic. He’s quixotic. He’s ? dangerous”

    And he makes Rudy Giuliani look like a kindly old gentleman.

    Gingrich hasn’t thrown his hat into the ring because he (and everybody else) knows that he is the world’s biggest cad.

  2. “the only Republican presidential candidate, declared or otherwise, who has the potential to be romantic. Other people give speeches; when Newt speaks, the words have music. He’s poetic. He’s quixotic. He’s ? dangerous”

    . . . He’s nauseous.

  3. But he does look kind of dreamy in the motorcycle boots and the faded jean jacket.

  4. That’s as nasty as that loser profiled yesterday who “fell in love” with Bush.

  5. I think Rudy ranks up there with Newt in Cadness. Caddiness?

    Call it Caditude.

  6. I am unable to relate in any way to what Lewis is saying, any more than I could to Matt Dowd yesterday. Who turns politics into a romantic attachment to the candidate? Is this what was going on with the Kennedys in the 1960s? And is this what actually distinguishes libertarians from members of “mainstream” parties — that we don’t fall in love with any candidates, our own or anyone else’s?

  7. But does he know why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

  8. NoStar: Giuliani is the frontrunner cad in the race. If Gingrich declares, then Giuliani may look timid by comparison. Nobody will ever beat the story about divorcing a wife on her deathbed with cancer while killing bambi and eating babies.

  9. Gringrich is a sellout.
    He wrote an article with Hillary Clinton about the benefits of socialist health care.
    The guy is obviously a media whore.
    The guy ought do what he does best, handing out divorce papers in a cancer ward.

  10. Other people give speeches; when Newt speaks, the words have music. He’s poetic. He’s quixotic. He’s ? dangerous”

    Can you hear that? It’s the sound of all of America vomiting.

  11. He’s ? the clear choice for a right-wingy voter chafing to “rebel.”

    If by “rebel” he means “usher in a Democratic administration,” well, I agree.

  12. Poetic. Romantic. Dangerous.

    All understatements.

    The lustrous timbre of his aching baritone reaches deep within me to soothe the core of my being, and settle the turbulent waves of my soul while still lifting me up, up, up into dizzying altitudes of possibility.

    A man of such depth, complexity, profundity. Where’er his thoughts may wander, miracles dwell in his wake. A statesman, a gentleman, an intellectual, a man of words.

    Ah, the words–etching themselves deep on my heart as they dance before my eyes. Genius, writ in gold upon the scrolls of history. Millennia from now, he will rest in the memory of a grateful race. Alongside history’s most sublime may he stand in marble: Plato, Aristotle, Cicero, Augustine, Aquinas, Newt.

    Oh, Newt. His milky blue eyes, soft pillow jowls, silky white hair…oh, I dare not continue.

    Compose a requiem for my heart. I am eternally the vassal of that most passionate of masters.

    ::swoon::

  13. “the only Republican presidential candidate, declared or otherwise, who has the potential to be romantic…”

    Haha Fags, Haha.

  14. His milky blue eyes,

    Crap. I just realized that Newt has brown eyes.

    Oh well. He was always a d-bag, anyway.

  15. Sigh wins points for pure talent.

    where’d you study writing?

  16. Um…

    Here’s a guy that fought tooth and nail to cut spending. Talk about a libertarian cause–does anyone else out there remember when the government shut down and no one cared?

    …Gingrich probably wouldn’t have been worse.

    I’d sure as hell vote for Gingrich over Hillary Clinton.

  17. where’d you study writing?

    The School of Overwraught Melodramatic Ode Composition. 😉

    I majored in the “Tao of the Romance Novel” and minored in “Run-on Sentences.”

    I give credit to the one and only Newt, my muse.

  18. And is this what actually distinguishes libertarians from members of “mainstream” parties — that we don’t fall in love with any candidates, our own or anyone else’s?

    *coff*Ron Paul*coffcoff*

    All I’m saying is, some people seem to have developed serious man-crushes on the guy and some capability he supposedly has to save the Republic even though the term “electoral poison” could have been invented for him.

  19. anyway, kudos for the black belt in melodrama. miracles dwell [swell?] in his wake was hilarious. you might dig george saunders

  20. The thought of running against Newt gives Hillary a hard-on.

    It would put the Democrats in power for the next generation, until voters forgot how stupid Republicans can really be.

  21. I thought it was the Objectivists who were the New Romantics.

    Newt has always been able to turn a phrase. Remember when he called Bob Dole the tax collector for the welfare state? That one stung. I was impressed by his 1984 polemic, Window of Opportunity, but it was clear from that, and from later writings, that his vision of post-Reaganite Republicanism was not necessarily small-government conservatism. Gingrich has always had a soft spot for big gestures and grand designs, and if a little ideological eggshell got in the omelet, well, them’s the breaks. You’d almost wonder if, deep in his heart of hearts, he didn’t see himself as a World Historical Figure of some sort. He has certainly worked hard to avoid being associated with a hidebound conservatism that could be labeled The Stupid Party, but I don’t think I’d be too far wrong to consider him the standardbearer for the Hubris Party. His romantic tendencies also left him open to sweet talking by Clinton. Remember that New Hampshire handshake? He was metaphorically in the backseat with his knickers down for Bubba.

    Besides, if this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody’s part, then libertarians are just the one’s to do it. That won’t be backing Gingrich, but Ron Paul. He may have had only the one wife, but I think that’s a bit more romantic than trrading out the old model when it starts looking old, wrinkly or, you know, fatally sick.

    A Reason golden-oldie: Jon Pitney’s 1997 takedown of the Gingrinch.

    Kevin

  22. When Ron Paul was campaigning to return to Congress after being away for several terms, Hewt Gingrich supported his opponent in the primary.
    I understand Ron Paul is still grateful for that.

  23. I suppose I should qualify my statement.

    I’d vote for Gingrich over Hillary Clinton, but that isn’t saying much. ’cause there’s nothing I can think of that Hillary Clinton could say or do that would persuade me to vote for her.

    I’d rather not vote.

    That being said, I give Gingrich credit for shutting down the government rather than caving on budget cuts, and I give him credit for tilting at the welfare state.

    …comparatively speaking, that ain’t half bad.

  24. And besides, Hillary’s an ignorant slut.

  25. Dude, robots can’t be sluts. I don’t care what Phillip K. Dick says, it’s just not possible to make it feel right.

  26. Newt Gingrich: because making Larry Flynt look like a responsible journalist is no mean feat

  27. Kinda reminds of what someone said about Byron: He was mad, bad, and dangerous to know.

  28. I come to bury Newt, not praise him. That said, unlike many politicians, Newt is an intelligent man.

    He’s also politically toxic.

    Keep moving, you looky-loos. Nothing to see here.

  29. I just keep getting this picture of, many years ago, in the hospital, when he was born and the nurse brought him in to the room to be with his mother for the first time, and she takes the baby in her arms, and looks down lovingly and says…

    “I think I’ll call you… Newt”.

    Can’t help it. Sorry.

    CB

  30. Is quixotic really a positive quality for a president? Don’t we have enough of that now?

  31. Newt Gingrich has always been a mighty leaky vessel to put much hope in.

  32. What’s the difference? We have no good choices, except for people who are unlikely to win.

  33. Well, I enjoyed his trilogy novels on the Civil War. Perhaps he ought to stick to revisionist history? As for Hillary, I might be tempted if she said, “I just read ‘Atlas Shrugged’ and Miss Rand’s powerful writing has convinced me that America ought to be a meritocracy.”

  34. Newt? Really? Newt “World War III” Gingrich? Or is WW IV or V? I lose count. Cripes. One wonders exactly what kind of a conservative candidate would satisfy the appetitie of these “starving” conservatives…

    To maintain the fusionist foundation, they’d obviously prefer a bona fide fiscal and social conservative, ideally with good family values and married to one wife. A real limited government Republican in the Ronald Reagan and Barry Goldwater tradition would be a welcome relief. As long as we builidng a conservative’s dream candidate, someone who had experience in the private sector, and even better… lets make him a wealthy self-made enterpreneur. He must be tough on crime, strong on defense, pro-gun with an “A” rating from the NRA, support low taxes and limited spending, be rated a “Taxpayers Friend” by the NTU, be pro-business with an 85% +rating from the US Chamber of Commerce, and a 0% rating from NARAL indicating a perfect pro-life voting record.

    Gosh, wouldn’t it also be great to also have a candidate who is an intellectual, an idea man, articulate, comfortable and coherent at a podium? Lets add those traits.

    What the hell, lets go all out. Let’s make him a decorated Vietnam war combat veteran who served with distinction and honor.

    Sigh, Now that would be a conservative candidate!

    And that is Chuck Hagel.

    To bad he screwed it all up by being completely right about the Iraq war since the beginning of the war. Then making it worse by saying exactly what he believed at every opportunity to try and change the direction of the country before Iraq turned into a complete disaster.

    Too bad. He should have known that Republicans would find that unforgivable.

    [Well, that was annoying. Late to the comment party because the same comment was lost on preview without a backup last night – without a backup copy of course.]

  35. I just keep getting this picture of, many years ago, in the hospital, when he was born and the nurse brought him in to the room to be with his mother for the first time, and she takes the baby in her arms, and looks down lovingly and says…

    “I think I’ll call you… Newt”.

    Can’t help it. Sorry.

    Actually, Newt’s mother always referred to him by the nickname of “Teeny Tiny.”

    Finally, when Newt became a teenager he found this pretty embarrassing, and said, “Mom! Why do you have always call me ‘Teeny Tiny’?”

    “Well,” his mother replied, “you are my Newt.

  36. When I hear “Newt”, I always think of the girl from Aliens. You know, the one who screamed all of the time.

  37. Gingrich has potential to be romantic? At least 3 women have believed this, but two have probably changed their minds.

    Libertarians should not give in to the romance. Newt will just bring to the divorce papers to us in the hospital, after he has become a tax collector for the welfare-warfare state.

  38. “My Newt.” Minute. Heh.

  39. I feel newtered by your comment, Stevo.

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