The Filthy Bumper Sticker Gang

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The Grier family of Georgia are apparently a gang of vile and persistant lawbreakers, flouting propriety and decency as a sick sort of career, according to the reactions of Georgia police. First, the 20-year-old kid was pulled over in Athens last year and forced to remove on the spot a "Bush Sucks Dick. Cheney Too" sticker; now mom Denise Grier is given a hundred dollar ticket for her "Bushit" decal.

She refuses to pay, and has obtained the services of an ACLU lawyer. According to the Progressive magazine article, Georgia's lewd bumpersticker statute was overtuned by its Supreme Court in 1991, in a challenge involving a "Shit Happens" sticker.

The Dekalb County cops have a suitably tough-talking non-response:

"We don't comment on other officers' tickets," says Officer Herschel Grangent, who handles media affairs. "That officer is making his decision on the street."

Those streets, ominously left unspoken, are filled with more filthy bumper stickers than you second-guessing desk-jockies can imagine, my friend, in your most hideous obscene dream. More, and worse, than you can imagine.

NEXT: State Cigarette Mob Can't Kick the Habit

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  1. I don’t know, I can imagine quite a bit.

  2. Bush Sucks Dick. Cheney Too

    I can understand why a cop might pull someone over for having that bumper sticker. To ask him where he got it so he can have one too.

    Too bad there isn’t any real crime going on in Georgia, or they wouldn’t bother violating someone’s 1st Amendment rights. They’d have no time.

    If you understand what Bush Sucks Dick. Cheney Too actually means, you are no longer a young naif who needs protecting. If you don’t understand what Bush Sucks Dick. Cheney Too means, then you aren’t being hurt even if you are a young naif. If you are an adult who understands what it means and are offended, tough shit. It is offensive speech for which the 1st amendment exists. There is no need to protect offenseless speech.

  3. “We don’t comment on other officers’ tickets,” says Officer Herschel Grangent, who handles media affairs. “That officer is making his decision on the street.”

    Right, because when he’s on the street, the officer has to make up the law as he goes along. What an asshat. I bet they still issue tickets for driving while black down there in Georgia.

  4. Remind me to route my next roadtrip AROUND Georgia.

  5. “Officer Herschel Grangent”

    Herschel???

  6. If you don’t understand what Bush Sucks Dick. Cheney Too means, then you aren’t being hurt even if you are a young naif

    who are you, Dr. Spock?

    free speech, offensive speech, fine. but people should at least show manners and civility when other folks are forced by circumstances (like sitting behind your POS in traffic) to be exposed to your free speech.

  7. Remind me to route my next roadtrip AROUND Georgia.

    Well, if you are driving North/South, I guess you could skip on over to Alabama. Last I checked, it was certified “Cracker-Free”. Honest.

  8. Albo-Perhaps they should. But the leap from “people ought to be civil” to “There otta be a law” is where the problem comes in.

  9. albo, there should not be a law against rudeness. I personally would rather not sit behind a car in traffic with nauseous bumper stickers like Save the Planet etc. The planet will always be here, it is the people who need saving.

    If you are going to ban one bumper sticker for any reason, you need to ban them all. How boring.

  10. A civil society does not tolerate people drving on the public roads with foul words and depictions for all to see on their vehicles. It’s a public road and it’s a priviledge to drive on it. I see no problem with imposing basic rules of conduct for those who share the roads.

    JMJ

  11. How’s life under that bridge, JMJ?

  12. A civil society does not tolerate people drving on the public roads with foul words and depictions for all to see on their vehicles. It’s a public road and it’s a priviledge to drive on it. I see no problem with imposing basic rules of conduct for those who share the roads.

    Great. Confederate flags and jesus fish offend me, so those get banned too, right?

  13. “I don’t know, I can imagine quite a bit.”

    Also, props for the Star Wars reference.

  14. Fishbane,

    The FCC sets simple standards for what goes on the public airwaves, the same could be done for the public roads. They are public places and not forums for scumbags who want to advertise their low-brow senses of humor.

    JMJ

  15. In a comment to the linked article attributed to Denise Grier she claims:

    “Actually the bumper sticker read: Bush sucks. Dick Cheney too.
    It’s all in the punctuation and word placemnt”

    Which makes it even more innocuous, unless the officer is claiming “sucks” as inherently obscene.

  16. I’m not for a law against being an offensive jerk. if so, that’s the end of internet discussion forums.

    but we all are a part of a society and as such should exercise a bit of that social lubricant called civility when out in the public spaces. people that don’t should be punished not by law but by ridicule and contempt.

  17. Jersey: The FCC sets simple standards for what goes on the public airwaves, the same could be done for the public roads.

    I’m familiar with the theory, I just find it odd that someone would hang out here and support the notion that a panel constipated moralists should set the tone for public discourse.

    Makes me want to make my life’s goal getting Robert Anton Wilson the FCC chair.

  18. Can we trade Jersey McJones for amazingdrx?

    As annoying and incomprehensible as amazingdrx was, he did at least seem to have a healthy regard for civil liberties.

  19. JMcJ,

    And what if I find bumper stickers that are disrespectful of our troops, or our president, to be offensive? And if I can remove those statements from people’s cars because they are in a public space, why not ban discussion of these topics in public parks, or restaurants, or on the public airwaves?

  20. Some of the best writing and creative use of language and grammar come from bumper stickers.

  21. OK, fine, the officer is out on the street and has to make a call.

    But when an appeal is filed and it gets back to the Department, it’s time for someone with some bars on his collar to use his freaking head.

  22. Mah Lawd, how will ah evah explain to mah babies why some folks don’t take a shine to our president? And Jesus help me if ah evah need to explain to them what “Bush Sucks. Dick Cheney Too.” means! There ought to be a law! Won’t somebody think of the children???

  23. Fishbane – they are public roads, there have to be standards. Do you want your kids to see cuss words and sex acts as you drive them to soccor practice?

    Steven,

    What about the civil liberties of those other folks driving along the public roads?

    Brian,

    “And what if I find bumper stickers that are disrespectful of our troops, or our president, to be offensive? And if I can remove those statements from people’s cars because they are in a public space, why not ban discussion of these topics in public parks, or restaurants, or on the public airwaves?”

    Ya’ ever hear the expression, “I’ll know it when I see it?” Yes, standards of decency are subjective, but that’s why we have a representative democracy to sort these things out.

    JMJ

  24. we all are a part of a society and as such should exercise a bit of that social lubricant called civility when out in the public spaces. people that don’t should be punished not by law but by ridicule and contempt

    Amen.

  25. Hayseeds who use bumper stickers to vent their crackpot theories are low-tech versions of bloggers who…

    Oh. Never mind.

  26. Fishbane – they are public roads, there have to be standards. Do you want your kids to see cuss words and sex acts as you drive them to soccor practice?

    Steven,

    What about the civil liberties of those other folks driving along the public roads?

    Brian,

    “And what if I find bumper stickers that are disrespectful of our troops, or our president, to be offensive? And if I can remove those statements from people’s cars because they are in a public space, why not ban discussion of these topics in public parks, or restaurants, or on the public airwaves?”

    Ya’ ever hear the expression, “I’ll know it when I see it?” Yes, standards of decency are subjective, but that’s why we have a representative democracy to sort these things out.

    JMJ

  27. It’s amazing to me that so many of you people equate obscenity with 1st amendment rights.

    If this is what passes for libertarian thought, then no wonder you are an irrelevant party.

  28. Where do you guys find this shit?

  29. joe, exactly. It’s natural that your average cop or even your average civil servant might do something silly or even unconstitutional. It’s another matter altogether when the institution behind the silly bad actor backs his action up.

    JMJ, the legal basis for the FCC’s ability to regulate the public airwaves is different from any governmental authority to regulate speech on cars or in a park. The rationale–one I mostly don’t agree with, incidentally–for the airwaves regulation is that the channels used are (1) public and (2) scarce. Since only so many people get a voice on those limited channels, we the people have a right to regulate the content that is broadcast over those channels.

    In regular speech land, the rationale doesn’t really exist except in certain limited situations. Therefore, I can wear a “Fuck the Draft” jacket or have a bumper sticker than says that the government is run by “damned aliens”. Content or viewpoint discrimination is particularly frowned upon, especially when the viewpoint in question is political. I’ve seen some nasty stuff from all sides, and I don’t particularly like the level of discourse in question, but there’s no question that it’s protected speech. Honestly, wouldn’t you be a little upset if the current administration said that anti-war bumper stickers (for example) were “offensive” and needed to be banned? I know that I would be.

  30. Jden,

    What is the free speech provision in the 1st Amenment for if not to protect offensive speech? Name one single other good reason for it please.

    If you disallow offensive speech, what speech is allowed? Who is to say that whatever you say will not be judged offensive by a jury of your “peers”?

  31. Steven,

    What about the civil liberties of those other folks driving along the public roads?

    What civil liberties are these that have been so trod upon?

  32. Fishbane – they are public roads, there have to be standards. Do you want your kids to see cuss words and sex acts as you drive them to soccor practice?

    Doesn’t bother me. When my kid reaches the point of old enough to have an idea of what’s going on, that’s a signal that it is time to talk about such things. Either I can teach her about it, of her peers will for me. I’d rather be the one to do it.

    You may prefer outsourcing that part of your parental responsibility, and that’s perfectly fine. Just don’t do it with my tax money. Ditto your FCC argument: if you want a pack of prunes making your media selections for you, I’m all for you doing just that. I would prefer to handle that task for myself, and not subsidize your use of that service.

  33. It’s amazing to me that so many of you people equate obscenity with 1st amendment rights.

    If this is what passes for libertarian thought, then no wonder you are an irrelevant party.
    Obscenity is already illegal, per SCOTUS. By calling the sticker obscene, you’re begging the question. The conclusion you’re assuming is doubly silly since, as far as I can tell, no one is arguing that the sticker met the legal definintion of obscenity (look it up.).
    If you’re wanting people here to take you seriously, you’re going to have to do better than that.

  34. Jersey-

    “What about the civil liberties of those other folks driving along the public roads?”

    What about them?

    I can walk up and down the street and say, “Bush sucks. Dick Cheney too” to every person I meet. Why can’t i put it on a car? Being annoying and/or vulgar isn’t a crime, nor should it be. People have differences. The last time a whole nation agreed on everything it was Germany in the 1930s, and it didn’t turn out that funny. If you get offended, sharpen your verbal machete and offer a response. Don’t go call your lawyer because people are saying your president is a cock gobbler.

  35. So, JMJ if I can’t have “Bush sucks” on a bumper sticker on my car, can I say it while walking down the road, loud enough to be overheard by passersby? What’s the distinction?

    I know, don’t feed the troll. I feel like a dog eating its own vomit, though – I just can’t help myself.

  36. Do you want your kids to see cuss words and sex acts as you drive them to soccor [sic] practice?

    Um, how about this: since you chose to breed the kids, and you’re also the one exposing the kids to “sex acts” mystifyingly carried out through bumper stickers (please post how that’s actually accomplished, when you get a chance), how about we have the cops pull YOU over and cite YOU for parental neglect?

    The law does NOT guarantee you and your spawn the right never to be offended. It does NOT guarantee that you and spawn will never encounter anyone in public who thinks, lives, or expresses themselves differently than you. You and your spawn are NOT victims, and have suffered no harm, just because you saw a damned bumper sticker you don’t like.

    If sharing a public world with diverse people causes you pain, then please stay in your house and have the kids play in the backyard.

  37. “They are public places and not forums for scumbags who want to advertise their low-brow senses of humor.”

    And yet, I have to imagine that if the administrators of this blog decided that they no longer wanted Jersey McJones venting his sense of low-brow politics and booted him off of this blog, he’d go back to what ever website he came here from and blather on about how Reason was unfair to kick him off of the site.

  38. Did someone call?

    Georgians deserve all the police state harrassment that can be appled to them. Maybe it will wake the confederate nazis up?

    Naaaw. Who cares. Seeing them tortured by their own stupidity is at least marginally satisfying.

    The southland is hopeless. Best to avoid the coming devestation from Katrina after Katrina by cutting off all aid. Then ship ALL the nuclear waste down south, they all can bury it under their trailers for cheap heat!

  39. JMJ, the “I know it when I see it” line comes from an offhand remark by Justice Stewart back when the current Miller test for obscenity was still being hammered out. It’s not the standard for evaluating whether speech is protected or not, not even for obscenity.

    Just for the record, the Miller test for obscenity is–

    • Whether the average person, applying contemporary community standards, would find that the work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient interest,
    • Whether the work depicts/describes, in a patently offensive way, sexual conduct specifically defined by applicable state law, and
    • Whether the work, taken as a whole, lacks serious literary, artistic, political, or scientific value.

    Although this test probably doesn’t hold completely any more (Internet? Community standards? Que pasa?), it shows that even hardcore pornography gets evaluated on a much deeper level than whether it’s “offensive”. Freedom of speech has little meaning if someone who disagrees with what you’ve said or who is even offended by what you’ve said can use the power of the state to shut you up.

  40. Gee geek, with your powerful connections at Reason, I bet you could get him booted? How is your campaign to boot me coming along?

  41. You know, the soothing surrealness of amazingdrx is something to behold 🙂

  42. Functions of the government: defend the borders, keep the infrastructure in good shape, and make sure kids are never exposed to words like “sucks.”

  43. JMJ: Your argument was rejected a long time ago by the Supreme Court in Cohen v. California. Here’s a very brief synopsis: http://www.oyez.org/oyez/resource/case/77/

  44. Just imagine the bumper stickers if Dukakis got elected in 88.

  45. PL,

    “JMJ, the legal basis for the FCC’s ability to regulate the public airwaves is different from any governmental authority to regulate speech on cars or in a park. The rationale–one I mostly don’t agree with, incidentally–for the airwaves regulation is that the channels used are (1) public and (2) scarce.”

    I fail to see the difference, PL. The roads are scarce too, in the sense that people pretty much have to drive those few roads they can to get from where they are to where they need to be.

    I’m only saying that “sucks dick” on a bumper sticker is (what’s the word for this again? – something to do with deficating…) bad. Heck, one could jjust make a list of ten words or so and be done with this.

    Steven,

    “What civil liberties are these that have been so trod upon?”

    The right to not have your kids exposed to profanity on the public roads.

    Fishbane,

    “Doesn’t bother me.”

    That’s the problem with libertarians – they lack Golden Rule sensibilities.

    Number 6,

    “It’s amazing to me that so many of you people equate obscenity with 1st amendment rights.

    If this is what passes for libertarian thought, then no wonder you are an irrelevant party.”

    – exactly. And I do consider myself a civil libertarian

    Emerson,

    “I can walk up and down the street and say, “Bush sucks. Dick Cheney too” to every person I meet.”

    Actually, no you can not. You could be arrested for disorderly conduct if you did that in a public place. And, by the way, comparing the illegality of obscene public behavior with the Nazis is just plain stupid and you are spitting in the face of 10s of millions of Hitler’s victims.

    RCD,

    “So, JMJ if I can’t have “Bush sucks” on a bumper sticker on my car, can I say it while walking down the road, loud enough to be overheard by passersby? What’s the distinction?”

    “Sucks dick” is the distinction, RCD. You can drive around with “Bush Sucks” all you want. I’ll beep at you and say, “yeah!”

    Zero,

    Read above.

    JMJ

  46. since the spectrum is limited, and the radio spectrum is part of the electromagnetic spectrum, as is the visible light spectrum, which is also quite limited, the gov’ment must regulate the visible light spectrum. I’m purchasing the rights to blue, green, and purple wavelengths. if you have any clothes that reflect these wavelengths, send me money for using my part of the visible light spectrum.

  47. “Yes, standards of decency are subjective, but that’s why we have a representative democracy to sort these things out.”

    It’s good to see Jonesy back in action, and ready to get his sorry ass handed to him yet again by the forces of sanity.

    Jonesy, here’s the thing: the Bill of Rights was set up to make sure that the tyranny of the majority (aka “representative democracy”) could not legally infringe upon certain things. Free speech is one of those things.

    In your majoritarian cracktopia, if 50.1% of the people voted that we all had to wear plaid pants on Thursdays, then it would instantly be a law.

    Honestly, Jonesy, I am dumbfounded that you STILL cannot tell the difference between a majoritarian democracy and a constitutional republic. Fucking dumbfounded!

  48. The right to not have your kids exposed to profanity on the public roads.

    Which Constitutional amendment guarantees your kids the right to never be exposed to profanity? Is it the amendment guaranteeing “freedom from speech”?

  49. The right to not have your kids exposed to profanity on the public roads.

    This is not a right; it’s neither enumerated nor implied. At -best-, it’s a social contract, but a remarkably stupid and outdated one. You can be offended by incivility and impoliteness all you want, but that is, and should only be, tough-titty for you.

  50. solution: let’s make all public spaces into private spaces and let the owners dictate codes of conduct.

    so, if that kind of speech is not tolerated on Fairlanes, you can use Cruiseways

  51. “I’m only saying that “sucks dick” on a bumper sticker is (what’s the word for this again? – something to do with deficating…) bad. Heck, one could jjust make a list of ten words or so and be done with this.”

    Who makes this list? You know, what if that same panel of moralist prudes who make up this list also decide that “Jersey” and “McJones” are offensive too? Oh, dang, Jonesy…you’re shit outta luck, baby!

  52. You know, the soothing surrealness of amazingdrx is something to behold 🙂

    I was just thinking this. It gives “lesser of two weevils” a new meaning.

  53. – exactly. And I do consider myself a civil libertarian

    Holy shit, if I consider myself a billionaire and offer you half will you go the fuck away.

  54. Georgians deserve all the police state harrassment that can be appled to them. Maybe it will wake the confederate nazis up?

    Damn, drx, I’d just given you credit for showing at least some fealty to the civil-libertarian cause.

    Are you honestly saying that even fellow civil-libertarians in Jawja deserve the “papers plz” treatment? Surely someone with a “Bush Sucks” bumper sticker isn’t much of a Confederate Nazi.

  55. Jonesy:

    “The right to not have your kids exposed to profanity on the public roads.”

    Funny, I don’t remember seeing that “right” enumerated anywhere.

    “That’s the problem with libertarians – they lack Golden Rule sensibilities.”

    Rrrrrriiiight, Jonesy. Sure. Actually, it’s precisely these sensibilities that lead us to oppose your hamhanded attempts to impose your views on everyone else: I wouldn’t want someone passing a law that prohibited me from saying the word “three” in public, so therefore, I don’t support laws that prohibit other words in public. It’s just that simple.

    It’s amazing how you can take your own shortcomings and try to project them onto others.

    “”Sucks dick” is the distinction, RCD. You can drive around with “Bush Sucks” all you want. I’ll beep at you and say, “yeah!”

    Why, because the Federal Decency Panel decided that sexual innuendo was not to be tolerated? Excuse me, but I find “suck” much more offensive than “dick”, Jonesy. Why aren’t MY preferences being protected? What about ME!?

  56. Geek,

    “And yet, I have to imagine that if the administrators of this blog decided that they no longer wanted Jersey McJones venting his sense of low-brow politics and booted him off of this blog, he’d go back to what ever website he came here from and blather on about how Reason was unfair to kick him off of the site.”

    I’ve been banned from Hannity and just about every conservative website out there. I pride myself in it. If you guys like your blinders on, then by all means ban me. I won’t blather that much. You wouldn’t be the first.

    PL,

    “JMJ, the “I know it when I see it” line comes from an offhand remark by Justice Stewart back when the current Miller test for obscenity was still being hammered out. It’s not the standard for evaluating whether speech is protected or not, not even for obscenity.”

    I’m impressed that you caught the reference – I’m depressed that you fail to see the connection…

    Jennifer,

    “Functions of the government: defend the borders, keep the infrastructure in good shape, and make sure kids are never exposed to words like “sucks.”

    “Sucks” has become a commonly accepted colloquialism. “Sucks dick” is profanity.

    Ron,

    Ron, you can take a jacket off. You can be thrown out of an establishment for wearing it. You can’t do the same with a car.

    JMJ

  57. This is what happens when the inmates are allowed internet privileges.

  58. linguist, as someone else around here said, it’s like performance art. Dr. X is the only true master. A Dali of insane political pronouncements, if you will.

    I’m awash in admiration.

  59. “Sucks” has become a commonly accepted colloquialism. “Sucks dick” is profanity.

    “Bush sucks. Dick Cheney too” is not even obscenity, but a double entendre. If seeing such a bumper sticker scars your kid for life, your kid never had a chance anyway.

  60. So, in JMJ Land, I could and should be thrown in jail for saying “Bush sucks dick” on a public road.

    Noted.

  61. “What about the civil liberties of those other folks driving along the public roads?”

    How in the Hell is seeing or hearing “obscene”* words or images a violation of anyone’s civil rights?

    I’ve read the Bill of Rights, top to bottom, left to right, and I can’t find one reference on protecting citizens from words, pictures, ideas, or anything else they find offensive. As a matter of fact, the First Amendement specifically protects freedom of speech, press, and expression.

    Freedom of Speech/Press/Expressionn wasn’t meant to protect just the speech that everyone finds agreeable. It was designed to protect the “offensive” the “radical,” and even the “obscene.”

    Of course Jersey, since there doesn’t seem to to be any area of our lives that you don’t think that government should intrude upon, this concept is lost on you. However, just what in the hell do you or society gain for making sure that someone is legally punished for displaying a bumper sticker that implies that the sitting president engages in fellatio? What the fuck do YOU get out of it?

    *There really is no such thing as “obsenity,” except in the neurotic minds of the anti-sex prudes who populate this world.

  62. Who makes this list?

    You said 10, right? Well I’ve got it 70% done.

  63. “Bush sucks. Dick Cheney too” is not even obscenity, but a double entendre. If seeing such a bumper sticker scars your kid for life, your kid never had a chance anyway.

    I’ve long thought that exactly no children are traumatized by exposure to adult material, but there are many children traumatized by their parents’ insane and neurotic overreactions to same.

  64. Evan, Jennifer, Steven,

    This is about using the PUBLIC ROADS – the PUBLIC ROADS that we pay taxes and tolls for. If the public generally agrees that it does not want to be subjected to profanity on the PUBLIC ROADS then so be it. (Besides, isn’t a bit of a health hazard?)

    JMJ

  65. What the hell kind of slobby world do you guys want to live in, anyway?

    JMJ

  66. “Bush sucks. Dick Cheney too”

    By the way – expressed like this – it would be fine.

    JMJ

  67. “The right to not have your kids exposed to profanity on the public roads.”

    When all else fails, play the kiddie card.

  68. What the hell kind of slobby world do you guys want to live in, anyway?

    A free one.

  69. What the hell kind of slobby world do you guys want to live in, anyway?

    The kind of world where merely being rude or offensive is not grounds for legal sanctions. The kind of world where people understand the difference between “being hurt” and “being offended.”

    This is about using the PUBLIC ROADS – the PUBLIC ROADS that we pay taxes and tolls for

    The bumper-sticker woman pays taxes too.

    If the public generally agrees that it does not want to be subjected to profanity on the PUBLIC ROADS then so be it.

    Ah, so the Constitution only applies to people of whom the public approves.

    If you really care so much about the will of the majority, then why the hell do you post here, anyway?

  70. JMJ, if we treat public fora as places where majoritarian values can be used to silence minority speakers, where will our discourse happen? Seriously. Don’t public fora deserve perhaps even greater protection? What happens to the “I Have a Dream” speech (on the Mall, right?) if the not-really-happy-about-all-that-black-anger majority said, “We are offended”?

    Of course, no Nazis ever marched through Skokie under your scheme. Maybe you’re right after all, because I hate Illinois Nazis 🙂

  71. What the hell kind of slobby world do you guys want to live in, anyway?

    The kind of world where merely being rude or offensive is not grounds for legal sanctions. The kind of world where people understand the difference between “being hurt” and “being offended.”

    This is about using the PUBLIC ROADS – the PUBLIC ROADS that we pay taxes and tolls for

    The bumper-sticker woman pays taxes too.

    If the public generally agrees that it does not want to be subjected to profanity on the PUBLIC ROADS then so be it.

    Ah, so the Constitution only applies to people of whom the public approves.

    If you really think the will of the majority is so important, then seriously–why the hell do you post here, anyway?

  72. The Reason staff’s continued refusal to do something about this goddamned server of theirs demonstrates their sublime indifference to the will of the majority, that’s for sure.

  73. “This is about using the PUBLIC ROADS – the PUBLIC ROADS that we pay taxes and tolls for. If the public generally agrees that it does not want to be subjected to profanity on the PUBLIC ROADS then so be it. (Besides, isn’t a bit of a health hazard?)”

    A) Just because something is labelled “public” doesn’t exempt the users from the First Amendment protections. Quite the opposite.

    B) How are “profane” bumper stickers a “public health hazard”. I’ve seen you reach before, but that one takes the cake.

    “What the hell kind of slobby world do you guys want to live in, anyway?”

    One where the personal preferences of a tyrannical majority aren’t legislated and enforced upon the minority at the point of a gun. One where the government has better things to do than police my bumper for words that might offend someone. One where slobbiness isn’t illegal, but is merely socially frowned upon. That kind of world.

    “By the way – expressed like this – it would be fine.”

    I’m so glad that the almighty Jersey McJones approves. Any more personal-preferences-come-laws that you’d like to shine down upon the unenlightened, slobby masses?

  74. his is about using the PUBLIC ROADS – the PUBLIC ROADS that we pay taxes and tolls for. If the public generally agrees that it does not want to be subjected to profanity on the PUBLIC ROADS then so be it. (Besides, isn’t a bit of a health hazard?)

    1. You’re assuming that the public does, actually, agree that it doesn’t want to see obscenity on the public roads. It probably doesn’t. (okay, it does, but the same people who object to “Bush Sucks Dick. Cheney Too” probably maintain an “Ass, Gas, or Grass; Nobody Rides For Free!” bumper sticker. Or worse, a Confederate flag. free speech for me, but not for thee!)

    2. Even if the public agrees (it doesn’t) you’re assuming that policing such speech is a legitimate purpose of government. Slippery, slippery slope, indeed.

    3. Health hazard? WTF?

  75. So, JMJ has been banned from Hannity. The mind boggles. It’s sort of like when the drummer got tossed out of Gun N Roses; you have to wonder, “Just how screwed up to you have to be to get tossed from that group?”

  76. So, JMJ has been banned from Hannity

    What?

  77. Jen: above, he was bragging about getting banned from some sean hannity discussion group. WTF exactly.

  78. Oh, yeah, Jen, somewhere today he noted that he’s been banned from hannity and “every other conservative blog” and is proud of it.

    (shrug)!

  79. JMJ – To paraphrase the first Clinton campaign, It’s the FREE SPEECH, stupid.

  80. Sure it’s a health hazard. People see sticker. People get distracted by obscenity. People crash cars. What’s not to get?

  81. I do consider myself a civil libertarian

    There “ought” to be a law that when you put something hysterically funny in a post that you warn people first so they don’t choke while eating via their instinct to laugh.

    http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=libertarian

    libertarian n.

    1) One who advocates maximizing individual rights and minimizing the role of the state.
    2) One who believes in free will.

    http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=civil

    civil adj.

    1)Of, relating to, or befitting a citizen or citizens: civil duties.
    2)Of or relating to citizens and their interrelations with one another or with the state: civil society; the civil branches of government.
    3)Of ordinary citizens or ordinary community life as distinguished from the military or the ecclesiastical: civil authorities.
    4)Of or in accordance with organized society; civilized.
    5)Sufficiently observing or befitting accepted social usages; not rude: a civil reply. See Synonyms at polite.
    6)Being in accordance with or denoting legally recognized divisions of time: a civil year.
    7)Law. Relating to the rights of private individuals and legal proceedings concerning these rights as distinguished from criminal, military, or international regulations or proceedings.

    Telling people what they can say or write or print is not libertarian, civil or otherwise. Perhaps you are using definition 5 of civil when you say you are a civil libertarian? Of course your statement violates any definition of libertarian.

  82. I agree with Jersey McJones.

    In fact, I want my children to be protected from obscenity.

    Like last week, when I turned on HBO when they were in the room, and I was offended that my children were exposed to an episode of Deadwood.

    There oughtta be a law.

  83. Oh, yeah, Jen, somewhere today he noted that he’s been banned from hannity and “every other conservative blog” and is proud of it.

    Well, I guess he needs something to be proud of. But I’m still curious to know why he even bothers coming here, if he thinks the will of the majority is so all-fired important.

  84. I agree with Jersey McJones.

    In fact, I want my children to be protected from obscenity.

    Like last week, when I turned on HBO when they were in the room, and I was offended that my children were exposed to an episode of Deadwood.

    There oughtta be a law.

  85. Jennifer,

    I’m not a majoritarian. I think pre-sentient fetal abortion should be legal and universally available, I think that the drug laws are barbaric, I think that rights are not democractically decided. BUT – I don’t think you should be able to smoke pot in front of a nursery school, or that elective abortion should be a right up through the ninth month. You have to draw a line and the line here is clear because you are using the PUBLIC ROADS.

    What the fuck is so tough about this for you guys?

    I simply believe that civil society must have some rules of behavior in the public square. Heck, I don’t think the fine should be more than a, “Excuse me sir, but would you please remove that low brow shit from your rear bumper?”

    JMJ

  86. I’m not a majoritarian. I think pre-sentient fetal abortion should be legal and universally available, I think that the drug laws are barbaric, I think that rights are not democractically decided. BUT – I don’t think you should be able to smoke pot in front of a nursery school, or that elective abortion should be a right up through the ninth month. You have to draw a line and the line here is clear because you are using the PUBLIC ROADS. What the fuck is so tough about this for you guys?

    I can’t speak for the other guys, but I personally am having a tough time seeing how rude bumper stickers are the equivalent to aborting a baby the day before going into labor, or getting toddlers hooked on drugs.

  87. I’m not a majoritarian. I think pre-sentient fetal abortion should be legal and universally available, I think that the drug laws are barbaric, I think that rights are not democractically decided. BUT – I don’t think you should be able to smoke pot in front of a nursery school, or that elective abortion should be a right up through the ninth month. You have to draw a line and the line here is clear because you are using the PUBLIC ROADS. What the fuck is so tough about this for you guys?

    I can’t speak for the other guys, but I personally am having a tough time seeing how rude bumper stickers are the equivalent to aborting a baby the day before going into labor, or getting toddlers hooked on drugs.

  88. I’m not a majoritarian. I think pre-sentient fetal abortion should be legal and universally available, I think that the drug laws are barbaric, I think that rights are not democractically decided. BUT – I don’t think you should be able to smoke pot in front of a nursery school, or that elective abortion should be a right up through the ninth month. You have to draw a line and the line here is clear because you are using the PUBLIC ROADS. What the fuck is so tough about this for you guys?

    I can’t speak for the other guys, but I personally am having a tough time seeing how rude bumper stickers are the equivalent to aborting a baby the day before going into labor, or getting toddlers hooked on drugs.

  89. What the fuck is so tough about this for you guys?

    Maybe it’s the idea that the public forum shouldn’t be dominated by the sensibilities of most sensitive members of the public.

    One thing I don’t think has been addressed yet, how can a cop enforce a statute that was invalidated by the SCOTUS? Because he’s a cop and he said so?

  90. JMJ: The problem is with the nature of the rules of behavior in the public square. The bumper sticker doesn’t hurt anyone. At worst, it would make an individual have to explain (honestly or falsely) to a minor what the bumper sticker meant.

    Ninth month abortion, smoking pot in front of a school, at least these things have some possibility of actual harm to another person. Laws about bumper stickers are just about your sensibilities, and I’ll be fucked before I suggest that there is room for your sensibilities in the law.

  91. Sure it’s a health hazard. People see sticker. People get distracted by obscenity. People crash cars. What’s not to get?

    Women with killer smiles or C cups should not be allowed to have driver’s licenses either by that standard.

    You have to draw a line and the line here is clear because you are using the PUBLIC ROADS

    I have a question for you. If the first amendment does not protect you in the public sphere, then where does it protect you? You don’t have first amendment rights in my home, and if you don’t have them in public, then the 1st amendment is irrelevant. Is that what you are saying?

  92. Jersey, if you’re so worried about the bad effects of obscenity and profanity on the republic, maybe you should stop using “fuck” and “shit” so often when you post. There might be kids reading this, you know.

  93. So, Jersey, it’s ok to suspend some civil rights if it’s on public property and the majority agrees?

  94. Jersey, if you’re so worried about the bad effects of obscenity and profanity on the republic, maybe you should stop using “fuck” and “shit” so often when you post. There might be kids reading this, you know.

  95. Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker and tits.

    Just wanted to bring it all back down to the basics. Statutes and civil codes banning the display, broadcast or live speech of any word(s) (offensive, indecent [by community standards] or other) would equate to prior restraint of speech which IS a direct violation of the 1st amendment.

    Such usage can be discouraged; however, a direct ban is unconstitutional.

  96. “Jersey, if you’re so worried about the bad effects of obscenity and profanity on the republic, maybe you should stop using “fuck” and “shit” so often when you post. There might be kids reading this, you know.”

    In the parlance of twitchy online gamers:

    PWNED

  97. “No man is good enough to govern another man, without that other’s consent.”

  98. I’m not a majoritarian.

    I simply believe that civil society must have some rules of behavior in the public square.

    And who the fuck get’s to decide what is and what isn’t “civil” in your society? How get’s to make the determination on what is and isn’t “obscene” or “vulgar?” In a democratic society, that tends to be the majority (or, in a representative democracy, a majority by proxy). If that’s not majoritarian, I don’t know what is.

    Unless you think that one person or a tiny group of “the right people” should be the ones to censor us, which is just as bad in my book as having mob-driven censorship.

  99. Edit: Who gets…

  100. Should a state be allowed to ban bumperstickers that have a picture of a man sucking a dick on them?

  101. Should a state be allowed to ban bumperstickers that have a picture of a man sucking a dick on them?

    Are they? Yes.
    Should they? No.

  102. I like my bumper sticker on my pickup truck aimed at both the public and any trailing police cars – COPS SAY, LEGALIZE DRUGS – with the Law Enforcement Against Prohibition website right below http://www.leap.cc/tbay

    Also have one that says, SAVE THE CHILDREN – LEGALIZE DRUGS

    If you would like one, drop me a note

    heath at leap.cc

  103. What about bumperstickers that have Calvin using his dick to pee onto a Chevy/Ford/Dodge/competitor truck model logo?

    Oh wait, those are Tailgate stickers, not bumper stickers…nm

  104. Should a state be allowed to ban bumperstickers that have a picture of a man sucking a dick on them?

    Anon2, I think that XXX gay porn should allowed on broadcast TV during the “family hour.” What do you think my answer would be?

  105. Jersey, I notice you’ve moved from trampling on the 2nd amendment to trampling on the 1st today. Why don’t you go back to yesterdays thread? I’d love to read your answers to some of the actual statistics that were posted after you bailed.

  106. I haven’t waded through to see if anyone else has brought this up, but just in case there’s a question: Printed profanity in a public place as part of a political message is unambiguously protected speech: The Supreme Court settled that question three decades ago in a case involving someone wearing a “Fuck the Draft” T-shirt in a public courthouse (which we all pay taxes for, etc.). There is no serious legal debate to be had on this question: Bumper stickers like these are clearly and unquestionably covered by the First Amendment.

  107. Mad Scientist, Jersey has no need for your puny mortal statistics!

    He makes his own reality!

  108. Julian:

    Tell that to Jersey. After all, he’s the one who tell us that profanity is a “health hazard.”

    Mad Scientist:

    Jersey, I notice you’ve moved from trampling on the 2nd amendment to trampling on the 1st today.

    I’ll give Jersey this much, whether it’s economics, guns, or free speech, he’s shown to be a consistent totalitarian thug.

  109. Okay, I am here late as usual so hopefully nobody will mind this one.

    JMJ,
    I’m only saying that “sucks dick” on a bumper sticker is (what’s the word for this again? – something to do with deficating…) bad. Heck, one could jjust make a list of ten words or so and be done with this.

    Well then, please pick out the 10 words/phrases you would prefer to be banned and let’s be done with this.

    Male Genitals
    —————

    aaron’s rod arm
    baby-maker beef
    blue vein meatroll bald-headed butler
    bald-headed mouse belly buster
    bathtub eel bearded blood sausage
    bird bone
    baloney banana
    bat bayonet
    bean tosser beef
    belly ruffian blade
    broomstick bum tickler
    bush beater button-hole worker
    cock candle
    carrot club
    crack haunter cranny hunter
    cracksman creamstick
    culty gun carnal stump
    chicken child-getter
    chink-stopper corey
    crook dick
    dork dong
    doniker dingus
    dipstick dagger
    dart of love dearest member
    dickey ding-dong
    dinger dingle-dangle
    dummy dodaddy
    dolly dooflicker
    down-leg dragon
    eel end
    family organ fiddle bow
    fish fishing rod
    flapper fool-sticker
    forefinger fucker
    foreman gun
    gut wrench giggle stick
    gadget gardener
    giggling pin gooser
    gravy maker grinding tool
    gristle gut stick
    hair splitter hambone
    hammer hanging johnny
    hoe handle holy poker
    horn hose
    hot rod heat-seeking moisture missle
    hairy hot dog jack in the box
    jemson jerking iron
    jigger jing hang
    jockam johnnie
    johhny one-eye the bald-headed champ
    johnson joint
    joy knob joy prong
    joy stick key
    kidney cracker kielbasa
    king member knob
    knocker ladies’ delight
    ladies’ lollipop ladies’ treasure
    lamp of life lance
    life preserver little brother
    little willie liver turner
    live sausage lizard
    lob lobcock
    lobster lollypop
    long john love dart
    love gun love missile
    lucy lung disturber
    mad mick magic wand
    man-root marrow bone
    master john thursday master of ceremonies
    meat meat hook
    meat whistle member
    merry maker middle leg
    milkman mister goodwrench
    mister tom mouse
    muscle mutton dagger
    my body’s captain natural scythe
    needle nimrod
    nippy noodle
    noony old blind rob
    one-eyed night crawler in the turtle neck sweater
    one-eyed milkman one-eyed trouser trout
    one-eyed wonder worm pant muscle
    pecker pee-pee
    pen pencil
    pendulum perch
    peter piccolo
    pike staff pile driver
    pin pink pencil
    pipe pisser
    pistol plugtail
    pocket piccolo pocket rocket
    pointer poker
    pole pork
    pork sword post
    prick pride and joy
    prong pud
    pudding pump handle
    purple-helmeted warrior of love
    pup putz
    quickening peg quimstake
    ram ramrod
    rawmeat reamer
    redcap rod
    rod of love rolling pin
    root rudder
    rupert russell the wonder muscle
    st. peter salami
    sausage sceptre
    schlong sexing piece
    shaft shmock
    short arm shove devil
    shvontz silent flute
    skin flute snake
    spigot spike-faggot
    spindle split-rump
    spout staff
    steaming hot kanga stem
    stick sting
    stump sugar stick
    sword tail pin
    tally-whacker tassel
    tent-peg thing
    third leg thistler
    throbber throbbing python of love
    tickle-gizzard tickler
    tong tool
    torch of cupid toy
    trap-stick trouser anaconda
    tube steak uncle dick
    vomiting cobra wand
    wang wazoo
    weapon wedge
    wheenie wacker
    whip whistle
    whore-pipe wick
    willie winkle
    wire worm
    yang yard
    yosh zubrick

    Well-Endowed (male)
    ——————–

    Basket for days donkey-rigged
    double-shung hung like a bull
    miracle meat timbered
    tons of basket tons of meat
    well-favored by nature well hung
    yard

    Semen
    ——-

    baby food baby juice
    bull gravy buttermilk
    chism come
    cream crud
    cum duck butter
    fetch glue
    gravy hockey
    honey hot milk
    jam jazz
    jelly jism
    jizz juice
    letch water load
    love liquor man oil
    marrow mettle
    milk oil of man
    ointment oyster
    prick juice pudding
    scum seed
    slime soap
    spendings sperm
    spew spratz
    spume spunk
    starch stuff
    tail juice tail water
    tallow wad
    white blow white honey

    Semen Related
    —————

    pearl necklace pecker tracks
    wet dream

    Ejaculate
    ———–

    big bang bust your nuts
    come come off
    cream cum
    die in a woman’s lap drop your load
    fire a shot get off
    get the dirty water off your chest
    get wet get your cookies
    get your jollies get your rocks off
    go off number three
    pop a nut shoot
    shoot off shoot your wad
    spend squirt

    Testicals
    ———–

    ballocks balls
    bangers beecham’s pills
    bird’s eggs boo-boos
    charlies cherries
    chestnuts clangers
    cojones cubes
    danglers eggs
    family jewels glands
    goolies jewels
    kanakas love apples
    marbles marshmallows
    nards nuts
    onions plums
    pounders rocks
    seeds slashers
    spunk holders squirrel
    food stones
    swingers

    Scrotum
    ———

    ball bag hairy bag
    poke sack

    Crab Lice
    ———–

    active citizens crabs
    crotch crickets gentlemen’s companions
    neighbors to the south pants rabbits
    seam squirrels

    Syphllis
    ———-

    coachman on the box french gout
    irish mutton ladies’ fever
    lifelong friend neapoliton bone ache
    old joe siff
    spanish needle the old dog

    Gonorrhea
    ———–

    buner clap
    dose gleet
    glim haircut
    lues lulu
    morning drop piss pins and needles
    piss pure cream stank cock
    strain tear

    Female Genitals
    —————–

    ace of spades adam’s cave
    altar of love bearded clam
    beaver belly entrance
    black bess bluebeard’s closet
    box brown madam
    bull’s eye bunny
    bush button hole
    cabbage patch canal
    candle holder cat’s meat
    cave of harmony cavern
    cellar door chocha
    cleft clutch
    cockpit cookie
    coot cooch
    cooze coupler
    crack cranny
    crease crevice
    crotch crumpet
    cunny cunny
    cunt dimple
    divine scar donut
    drain eel-skinner
    fish tank fort bushy
    front window fur
    furbox furburger
    furrow gap
    gaper gash
    gate of heaven ginch
    ginny girl-street
    goat-milker gravy-maker
    gully-hole hair
    haircourt hair pie
    happy valley harbour of hope
    hatch hog eye
    hole honey-hive
    honey-pot horse collar
    hot box hot spot
    house under the hill irish fortune
    itching jenny jack nasty-face
    jaxy jelly-role
    juice box keyhole
    lady jane lamp of love
    lapland lather-maker
    little mary locker
    long-eye love tunnel
    lower lips magpie’s nest
    main vein manhole
    mark of the beast meat
    meat grinder mom’s homemade slit pie
    mound mount pleasant
    mouse mouth-that-cannot-bite
    muff naf
    nature’s tufted treasure nest
    niche nook
    nooky notch
    oat-bin old mossyface
    organ grinder oven
    oyster catcher patch
    pelt penwiper
    pie piece
    pin cushion pipe cleaner
    piss flaps pit
    playpen pocker
    poke hole poontang
    poor man’s blessing prick purse
    pussy quiff
    quim quiver
    rose screw-hole
    slash slit
    slot snapper
    snappin’ pussy snatch
    snatch-box stank
    steam room stuff
    socket sportsman’s gap
    sugar basin tail
    temple of low men tool-chest
    toy shop treasure chest
    trench triangle
    trim tube
    tuna taca tunnel
    tunnel of love twat
    tweeze twitcher
    vag valley
    venus highway vertical smile
    wet cave of lust wooly-burger
    works yawnie
    yum-yum

    Female Genitals (related)
    —————————

    boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
    —————————

    boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
    —————————

    boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related)
    —————————

    boy-in-the-boat bush
    button cherry
    clamp clit
    clitty cleopatra
    lady’s low toupee lather
    letch-water love juice
    man-in-the-canoe merkin
    mugget pussy fart
    vaginal blood fart

    Breasts
    ———

    apples balcony
    balloons bangers
    bazongas bean bags
    big brown eyes bon-bons
    boobies boobs
    bottles boulders
    bullets busters
    bumpers butterbags
    cantelopes gazongas
    glands globes
    grapefruits guavas
    handful hand-warmers
    headers headlights
    hills honkers
    hooters howitizers
    jaboos jibs
    jugs jumbos
    kazongas knobs
    knockers lactoids
    loaves loblollies
    love bubbles love muffins
    lulus lungs
    mammets mams
    mangoes meatballs
    meat loaves melons
    milk cans milkshop
    mounds mount of lillies
    mountains muffins
    mulligans murphies
    nancies nature’s fonts
    niblets ninnies
    nippers nodules
    noogies nubbies
    nuts oranges
    orbs ottomans
    pair nuts oranges
    orbs ottomans
    pair palookas
    papayas paps
    peaches peaks
    pears pects
    peepers pillows
    pips pokers
    pontoons potatoes
    pumpkins pumps
    rib cushions roundies
    sandbags scones
    scoops set
    shakers shimmies
    skin sacks snuggle pups
    spheres spuds
    stacks stuffing
    sweater meat sweet rools
    swingers tamales
    tetons tidbits
    tits titters
    titties tomatoes
    tooters torpedoes
    twangers twin peaks
    twofers umlauts
    upper deck waldos
    warheads warts
    watermelons whoppers
    wobblers wongas
    yabbos yams
    zeppelins

    Menstruation
    ————–

    aunt flo aunt rosie is in town
    all’s not quiet on the waterfront
    blood week collywobbles
    curse of eve drip
    entertain the general fall off the roof
    flying the flag having the painters in
    high tide holy week
    jinx little sister is here
    monthlies my buddy
    my friend on the bun
    on the pole on the rag
    period problem
    ragging ragtime
    red flag red sails in the sunset
    riding the cotton bicycle riding the cotton pony
    road up for repairs sick
    stop sign tail flowers
    that time that way
    the captain is at home the curse
    the foe the hammock is swinging
    the plague the thing
    the visitor turns
    wearing the bulky roll woman’s home companion

    Sanitary Napkin
    —————–

    bandage clout
    cuntrag fanny rag
    flag granny rag
    manhole cover mouth mattress
    muck rag pleasure garden padlock
    rag red flag
    window blinds

    Pregnant
    ———-

    about-to-find-pups apron up
    baby-bound bagged
    belly up big with child
    broken-kneed clucky
    cocked-up coming fresh
    delicate condition double-ribbed
    fragrant full of heir
    gone to seed have a dumpling
    have one in the oven have one’s cargo aboard
    in a family way in pod
    in the pudding club in trouble
    knocked up loaded
    looking piggy on the bones
    P.G. pillowed
    preggers preggy
    shot in the giblets storked
    stung by a serpent swallowed a watermelon seed
    up and coming up the stick
    wedged up with squirrel

    Fornication
    ————-

    a bit of jam action
    ball ballock
    boloney ride bananas and cream
    bang basket making
    batter beef
    beef injection be in a woman’s beef
    belly ride belt
    blanket drill blow off the loose corns
    board boff
    bone bore
    bottle bounce
    bump bump fur
    bunny stick burry one’s wick
    bury the bone bush patrol
    buzz the brillo cane
    change one’s luck charge
    chuck a tread climb
    cock up come across
    couple with cover
    crack it cram
    crawl cream
    cut dance the mattress jig
    daub of the brush dick
    dicky dunk diddle
    dig your stinger in the honey dip your stick
    dip your wick dirty work at the crossroads
    do do a dive in the dark
    do a flop do a push
    do a slide up the board dog
    do it do the deed
    do the nasty ease nature
    exchange spit feather-bed jig
    feed the dummy fiddle
    firk fit end to end
    fix her plumbing flesh session
    flop flop in the hay
    four-legged frolic frig
    fuck fun and games
    get a bit get a chunk
    get a crumpet get a hunk
    get a little get a piece
    get a snipper get a wet one
    get home get in
    get into her pants get into some serious flesh
    get it on get jack in the orchard
    get laid get lucky
    get one’s ashes hauled get one’s greens
    get one’s leather stretched get one’s noodle wet
    get one’s oil changed get some
    get some action get some ass
    get some crack get some hair
    get some hole get some pussy
    get some stuff get some tail
    get some tweeze get your bean waxed
    get your pole varnished give her a stab
    go all the way go like a belt-fed motor
    go to bed with go to it
    go to town go vaulting
    grease the wheel grind
    grind on’e tool hanky-panky
    have have a bit
    have a bit of giblet pie have a bit of summer cabbage
    have a blow through have sex with
    hide the ferret hide the salami
    hit on the tail hock
    hop on horizontal refreshment
    hose hot roll with cream
    hump impale
    introduce charlie invade
    irish whist jazz
    jink job
    join paunches jounce
    joy ride jug
    juke jump
    jump on one’s bones knock
    knock off a piece know
    ladies’ tailoring lay
    lay off with lay some pipe
    lay the hip lay some leg
    leap leap on
    lie lie with
    lob in love
    make make feet for childrens shoes
    make it make love
    make out with make the scene
    making babies makin’ whoopie
    mate mess around
    mingle limbs mix one’s peanut butter
    mount mugg
    muss nail
    mail two bellies together nick
    nib nig
    nub nut
    oblige off
    park your yacht in the hair harbor
    peel one’s best end peg
    perform pestle
    piece piece of ass
    piece of pussy piece of snatch
    piece of tail pile
    pile-driving pin
    plant the oats play at all fours
    play hide the bone plow
    pluck plug
    pocket the red poke
    pole pole work
    polish your rocket pop
    pork post a letter
    pound pump
    punch push
    put the boots to put the tool in the shed
    quimsticking ram
    ride rip off
    rites of venus roasting the broomstick
    roll roll in the hay
    rock rod
    roger romp
    root rootle
    roust rub bacons
    rub up rumble
    rumple rutting
    salt saw off a chunk
    score screw
    scutz around secret services
    service shack up
    crew
    scutz around secret services
    service shack up
    shaft shag
    shake shake the sheets
    shoot between wind and water shoot one’s wad
    short arm practice shove
    shtup sink the sausage
    sink the soldier slam
    sleep with slip her a length
    slip into split
    spoil suattin’ on the hog
    squat jumps in the cucumber patch
    squeeze and a squirt stab
    stable my naggie strop one’s beak
    strum stuff
    swing tail-work
    take a turn in the stubble take a turn on shooter’s hill
    tear off a piece tear the sheets
    the disappearing cane trick the matrimonial polka
    thread thread the needle
    throw a hump throw a leg over
    throw a shot thump
    tie the true lover’s knot tiff
    tip the long one to be intimate
    tooling in the woods tops and bottoms
    trim trim the buff
    trip up the rhine tumble
    tumple turn up
    twiddle varnish one’s cane
    vault vitamin F
    wap wham
    what mother did before me wind the clock
    womanize work
    work out work the dumb oracle
    work the hairy oracle yard
    yentz

    Sexual Arousal (both sexes)
    —————————–

    blotty brimming
    bulging cockish
    dripping for it feeling hairy
    frisky fuckish
    gamy hairy
    horny hot
    hot-assed hot and bothered
    hot nuts hot pants
    humpy in the mood
    in season itchy pants
    juiced up juicy
    lathered moist
    motor running on for one’s greens
    oncoming pruning
    ramish randy
    ready rooty
    ruttish sexed up
    tumbling ripe turned on
    up wet

    Sexually Fixated
    ——————

    cock-happy cunny haunted
    cunt-struck

    Testaglia
    ———–

    blue balls hot rocks
    love nuts lover’s nuts
    stone ache

    Condom
    ——–

    balloon cheater
    close combat sock diving suit
    drop catcher eel skin
    fear-not french letter
    gasket joybag
    one-piece overcoat pipe pullover
    port said garter raincoat
    rubber rubber glove
    safe scumbag
    sheath showercap
    tail sheath

    Erection
    ———-

    bone boner
    bone on burgeoning truncheon
    captain standfish flagpole
    hard hard-on
    horn in one’s best clothes
    irish toothache mean-on
    morning pride old hornington
    on the stand pants pusher
    piss hard piss proud
    prod proud below the navel
    proud mary rail
    riser rise in the levi’s
    rod-on rock python
    spike stalk
    standing ware stand-up
    stiff stiffer
    steely dan sporting a sequoiya
    throbber woody

    Illegitimate Child
    ——————–

    accident adulterine
    babe of love bachelor’s son
    bar steward bastard
    born out of wedlock bush colt
    bye-blow catch colt
    chance-born chance child
    hasty pudding love child
    merry-begotton child misbegotten
    momzer natural
    nephew niece
    out-child side wind
    single child son of a bitch
    squeaker stall whimper
    whoreson yard child

  110. Akira,

    I have no problem with gay porn on broadcast TV. Don’t want to watch it? Change the channel. Don’t want your kids to watch it? Don’t let them.

    However, if I were the owner of a road and I wanted to maximize my profits, I’d likely have rules that would prohibit some displays. What would those rules be? I don’t know-my mores are sufficiently incongruent to my fellow countryman’s (especially considering the state I live in) that I’d have to consult and/or conduct polls and other marketing research to figure out where to draw the line.

    The populace is squeamish about sex. “Bush sucks” is a colloquialism that has largely come (heh) to have no sexual content. “Bush sucks Dick.” is significantly different in most people’s eyes. I’d bet money that if you MRI’d average people and showed them those two different sentences that different parts of their brains would fire while reading each.

    Allowing the states to decide their own rules for their own roads is a compromise.

    Julian,

    There may be other supreme court cases where the political aspect has been allowed to trump the obscenity aspect, but the “Fuck the Draft” case (Cohen v. California) is not one. This is from the majority opinion, with emphasis added:

    In the second place, as it comes to us, this case cannot be said to fall within those relatively few categories of [403 U.S. 15, 20] instances where prior decisions have established the power of government to deal more comprehensively with certain forms of individual expression simply upon a showing that such a form was employed. This is not, for example, an obscenity case. Whatever else may be necessary to give rise to the States’ broader power to prohibit obscene expression, such expression must be, in some significant way, erotic. Roth v. United States, 354 U.S. 476 (1957). It cannot plausibly be maintained that this vulgar allusion to the Selective Service System would conjure up such psychic stimulation in anyone likely to be confronted with Cohen’s crudely defaced jacket.

  111. That having been said,
    there ought to be a law requiring a bumper sticker that reads,”Bush Sucks Dick Cheney’s Motherfucking One-Eyed Trouser Snake”.

    Support Cannibalism, Eat Me.

  112. Thanks Kwix! Screw reader’s digest, I’m enriching my vocabulary with *fun* words

    – they are public roads, there have to be standards. Do you want your kids to see cuss words and sex acts as you drive them to soccor practice?

    Actually, it’s the opposite- I’m much more worried about my parents. I still remember, when I was in the third grade, a feeling of panicked embarrassment when the whole family was in the car, and upon seeing some grafitti on a wall my grandmother piped up “Ed… is… Dickless… What does that mean?”

  113. However, if I were the owner of a road and I wanted to maximize my profits, I’d likely have rules that would prohibit some displays.

    Ahhhh… but these aren’t your roads. They are the government’s

    Allowing the states to decide their own rules for their own roads is a compromise.

    No, it would be a violation of the First Amendment, and according to the Fourteenth Amendment, you can’t use “state’s rights” bullshit to wiggle out of it.

    Besides, the last thing we should ever allow is a “compromise” on our rights.

  114. Where can I pick one of those bumper stickers for my car?

    I know several people who will want theirs, too.

  115. JMJ, tell me something, my mother still forbids me to use the word sucks in her presence because she still believes in it’s original meaning alluding to oral sex, what then if she gets to regulate obsecnity? Oh, that’s right, she and people like her don’t exist and will never create obscenity laws because your limited means of imagination locks you in a permanent mode of dumbassery.
    Sorry 🙁

  116. And another thing “Woman-Killer”, you applaud Hugo Chavez’s caudilloing of Venezuala, you want further restrictions ON THE FRICKIN’ BILL OF RIGHTS!!! and yet you can still smugly claim you are a civil libertarian…you know this reminds me of how Benito Mussolini claimed to be “The only libertarian”…
    Well, of course I’m not comparing “Woman-Killer” to Mussolini (I mean that would require an ability to comprehend logic), but I think a man of your intellegnce would be quite happy in in a preppy, black millitary-style uniform, and detering those vile anarchists from the deviancies of “Littering The Streets With Malicious Intent” or “3rd Degree Rudeness” or the dreaded “Disrespecting the Leader”
    And I’m sure that everyone would pat you on your head for your very, very good job and then give you some candy 🙂

  117. Just wondering, is it OK for me to put a bumpersticker on my car that says “John Kerry is a Motherfucking Cocksucker”?

    Just wondering where the line might be.

  118. I’d like to post further, but apparently I’m on some kind of probation for being abusive. Ironic that this would be the case on a “libertarian” site.

    I guess you guys don’t care to stand up for what you believe in.

    JMJ

  119. You trade in ad hominems, man.

    I may be a libertarian, but boy howdy do I get cheesed off when people track mud across my floor.

    dig?

  120. What ad hominem attacks? No, I don’t dig.

    JMJ

  121. Jersey,

    Here’s what to do. Everytime you see someone with an offensive sticker on their car, drive up right alondside them, flick them the bird and scream ‘hey DICKWEED,you’re an ASSHOLE!’

    That way, you get it out your system and you don’t think up ideas of legislating against vulgarity.

  122. Mark, your’s is a world I would rather not live in. And that’s the whole point here. It also gets to the “health” matter I brought up earlier. The last thing we need is more distraction for drivers. We can’t stop people from doig most things, but at least we can assert a few simple rules for driving on the PUBLIC ROADS.

    JMJ

  123. Well, basically, tough luck.

    Personally, I’d rather boy bands, communists, rabid feminists, humourless novelists, greenpeace activists, tabloid jounalists, welfare dodgers, precocious children and cats all disappeared tomorrow.

    But their rights are exactly equal to mine and as long as they put up with me, I’ll return the compliment.

    And the health argument is surely a bit nanny state?

    Anyway, if you don’t want to live in a world like that, move to Switzerland! It’s clean, polite, opinionless and boring.

  124. Mark,

    It ain’t tough luck for me. The laws of the land are on my side on this one.

    As for your comment about cats – hope you like vermin! Because that’s a world without cats would get you. Just ask medieval Europe!

    (If I had the dough, I’d move to Switzerland tomorrow…)

    JMJ

  125. Nope,

    You’ll lose this one. I think it’s a case of perhaps winning a battle but the war etcetc.

    Would you sanction the ‘Bush sucks Cheney’ sticker, if, at a later date, it transpired that the president and his deputy had actually been pleasuring one another? So then it wpuld be a matter of fact.

    Would you let me have the sticker on my car then? or would it have to be more journalistic and therefore less offensive i.e ‘Bush orally satisfies Cheney but both say it is not simply physical but spiritual/emotional’.

    Not as catchy but more honest?

  126. “I’d like to post further, but apparently I’m on some kind of probation for being abusive. Ironic that this would be the case on a “libertarian” site. I guess you guys don’t care to stand up for what you believe in.”

    A) Don’t mistake their shitty gerbil-powered comment server for “probation”. You’ve got to do alot worse than what you’ve done (run afoul of logic and reason) to get booted from this joint.

    B) You seem to be posting okay, so, my point was spot-on.

    C) Even if you were banned or put on probation, it would still be consistent with the principles of libertarianism. The Bill of Rights prohibits the government from abridging your right to free speech. But that doesn’t mean you can come onto private property and do whatever you want. Since it’s my property, I can kick you out if I want.

    D) Jersey, I think you could benefit from a crash-course in what a constitutional republic really is: for your own good, and the good of everyone who has to deal with you, please read this!

  127. Evan, I’m pretty fluent on the constitution.

    I lost a post because of some starnge probationary warning I got this morning but the problem has appeared to go away. That’s refreshing!

    Mark,

    That’s pretty vulgar. I don’t know what to say about it, other than I’d have such crap removed at car inspections in order to pass. (Now that’s an idea!)

    JMJ

  128. Concerning the “public safety” argument–anyone who would actually have an accident because they saw a naughty bumper sticker is too mentally unstable to be trusted with a driver’s licence. I shudder to think of how many would die if such a bluenose saw another driver flipping them the bird.

    I’d have such crap removed at car inspections in order to pass. (Now that’s an idea!)

    Yes, a bad idea–“cars will not be allowed on the roads if any of them offend the delicate sensibilities of Jersey ‘fuck this lowbrow shit’ McJones.”

  129. Jersey,

    While you may be “fluent”, you’ve demonstrated, time and time again, your inability to actually understand it.

    Which is why I posted the link to “democracies and republics for dummies” link, hoping that maybe you’d be able to understand that. If you choose to not read it, then that’s your loss, because it explains many concepts upon which our country was founded, but which you (and many other populist-liberals) cannot or refuse to understand.

    My favorite quote:

    “In a democracy, two wolves and a sheep take a majority vote on what’s for supper, whereas in a republic, the wolves are forbidden on voting on what’s for supper and the sheep are well armed.”

    In Jersey’s world, the majority gets to force its preferences upon others. In a constitutional republic (that’s what our country is supposed to be), you cannot use the law to universally enforce your preferences.

  130. This is like a wierd bizzarro universe… Conservatives say that I trample on majority will and you guys call me a majoritarian!!! Wierd.

    JMJ

  131. Evan,

    Please just say what exactly you think I don’t understand. Don’t just make silly hyperbolic sweeping statements like that. It doesn’t make you look any brighter.

    JMJ

  132. It doesn’t make you look any brighter.

    Brilliant. It’s like when your mum tells you off for showing off.

    NNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!

  133. “Anyway, if you don’t want to live in a world like that, move to Switzerland! It’s clean, polite, opinionless and boring.”

    He couldn’t stand to live in Switzerland, either.

    They’re all armed to the teeth.

  134. Also, evidently Jersey missed the bit where Julian pointed out that the Supreme Court has ruled that using dirty words to make a political point is indeed protected speech.

    But then again, Jersey doesn’t seem to understand that there are these things called “facts” and that if “facts” run contradictory to one’s statements then those statements become invalidated.

  135. Jersey’s taking a bit of a drubbing here. I admire his polite refusal to give in, even if I don’t agree with him.

    And I feel like I have sold Switzerland short. It does have good chocolate and skiing. Both positives.

  136. JMJ,

    I understood your examples that show you’re not a majoritarian. I also understand that you’re making the distinction between “Bush Sucks. Dick Cheney too.” and “Bush Sucks Dick. Cheney too.” It’s not clear that the laws of the land are on your side, but they may be, as the conclusion from this article on the first amendment as it applies to bumper stickers states:

    Conclusion

    Citizens have a right to express themselves in a variety of ways. Bumper stickers represent a popular, inexpensive and sometimes humorous way to express viewpoints on an endless range of subjects. But as the cases mentioned above demonstrate, bumper stickers with profanity will occasionally lead to a citation or arrest. Profanity may be a form of protected speech but it often raises the ire of government officials. The First Amendment provides a great deal of protection for offensive speech and it is unlikely that most bumper-sticker citations, at least as applied to private citizens, would withstand a constitutional challenge. However, the federal courts have painted a much cloudier picture with respect to public employees and bumper stickers.

    I personally don’t doubt that the Supreme Court would allow state laws that ban bumper stickers that have a picture of anyone (male, female, President, intern, etc.) sucking dick on them. Whether mere words, especially political ones in the context of a double-entendre, would be ruled by the supremes as obscenity and thus regulable has more to do with which judges hear the case and what they want the outcome to be than on any other factors.

    It’s possible that the article you posted had more than one link in it. That’s a known issue with the filter, and if that’s what got your post, it does so regardless (as far as I know) to the author. Were that filter not in place, I’d provide some links mentioning Mishkin, since this thread and the article I’ve linked to mention Miller and Miller without Mishkin can be very misleading, especially as it relates to Bush sucking dick/Dick.

    Mediageek,

    I quoted from the Supreme Court’s majority opinion in Cohen. That case was not about obscenity, so it doesn’t apply to an argument that “Bush sucks Dick” is obscene. Miller and Mishkin are more imporant there. Julian erred; you can check it yourself. As both JMJ and I have pointed out, there is a difference (and I’m even willing to bet money that MRIs would show it) between “Bush Sucks” and “Bush Sucks Dick.”

  137. There’s a dark, smoky, NOISY little bar in Gillette, Wyoming with bumper stickers plastered all over everyplace. MY favorite: “FUCK THE GOVERNMENT”

    And the best part is- you don’t have to worry about bumping into Jersey McNanny in there.

  138. Why, if he were to be exposed to such harsh language, he just might faint dead away.

  139. Geek,

    “Also, evidently Jersey missed the bit where Julian pointed out that the Supreme Court has ruled that using dirty words to make a political point is indeed protected speech.”

    The court ruled that you could use dirty words in a whole variety of ways – but not plastered on your car driving down a PUBLIC ROAD. (Facts? Please…)

    Anon,

    Thanks.

    P Brooks,

    “There’s a dark, smoky, NOISY little bar in Gillette, Wyoming with bumper stickers plastered all over everyplace. MY favorite: “FUCK THE GOVERNMENT”

    And the best part is- you don’t have to worry about bumping into Jersey McNanny in there.”

    No, but thank you, Wyoming, for Dick Cheney and for taking way more tax dollars from me in New Jersey then we ever get back.

    Yeah, you Wyomingers “fuck the government” alright – fuck it for all the pork it’s worth.

    JMJ

  140. Jersey, stop using such awful, harsh language!

    There might be children reading this!

  141. “No, but thank you, Wyoming, for Dick Cheney and for taking way more tax dollars from me in New Jersey then we ever get back.”

    Totally beside the point.

  142. Besides the point! What the hell are you talking about? P Brooks brags that “McNanny” wouldn’t be found in a bar in Wyoming while Wyoming is among the worst Nanny States around!

    Jeez man – c’mon! Get with the show!

    JMJ

  143. Honestly, do I even need to paint a picture for you?

    The point was that there’s a bar with a naughty bumper sticker on the wall. Something that would cause your virgin eyes to burn.

    Nevermind that you continue to swear in an onstensibly public venue, but then again, raging hypocrisy is a hallmark of liberty-hating statists like you.

  144. You know, I think Jersey McJones could solve this nasty problem of our false consciousness if only Hugo Chavez ruled the US…

    Ah yes, in the mystical land of Venezuala, Hugo Chavez would silence this facile discussion because it only helps those capitalistic fat cats who exploit the vulgarities of the masses.
    And not only that, it dilutes the revolutionary discoures on how best to use the Venezulan oil revenue to prop up Fidel Castro, because those concentration camps for homos can’t run themselves.
    And let’s not forget this would automatically help civil liberites!

    FOR THE GOOD OF THE PEOPLE AND THE BOLIVARAN REVOLUTION! VIVA!

    BTW, JMJ would do you think of my mother and her reaction to sucks, and careful what you say about my mother, you don’t want to get banned do you? 🙂

  145. Frank,

    I don’t like the low brow culture any more than anyone else. You can’t ban everything. But a modicum of common sense should suffice. I’m sure your dear mommy wouldn’t prefer some of the other words we’ve been bandying about here any more than “sucks.”

    JMJ

  146. “I don’t like the low brow culture any more than anyone else.”

    Yet you make liberal use of all sorts of language that people find offensive.

    I’m changing my vote, you can’t possibly be serious. Someone be funnin’ on us.

  147. I don’t know quite what to say- that was spleen-diferous

    All I meant was that Mr McNanny strikes me as the sort of person who would never voluntarily expose himself (OR OTHERS) to the sort of hazards present in that little dark and noisy room.

    I never saw Cheney there. But there was some old guy passed out on a table in the back.

  148. I don’t like the low brow culture any more than anyone else

    And yet you act as if YOUR common sense is the same as other people’s common sense, that the mores of today will be the mores of tomorrow, and that THE LAW needs to be involved in regulating rudeness. Why get the cops involved when a simple social shunning will do or a needed slap in tha face by a righteous matron?
    “Why because of the CHILDREN of course!” JMJ shouted (rolls eyes in frustration)

    This is why people despise your ingnorant prudishness, JMJ, because you assume that incarnating our social morals into law will somehow make our society more pleasant, when in fact those same boundaries are used by the police/state to silence valid criticism of government/society. Today’s happy society is tomorrow’s legitimacy to stop the publication of “rude” materials. I guess in the cause of rudeness we should also ban the Marquis de Sade or Henry Miller for any child could easily walk into a PUBLIC, PUBLIC I SAID!!!, library and read ’till their hearts content of sex! sex! sex!

    I would love to see how the lawyers who hear your arguements on crafting law around “common sense” just crack at the seams from laughter

    As for Hit n’ Run and our collective…brusqueness, well we hear know what we’re getting into, and truthfully I wouldn’t be using the same language here that I would use in front of my mother or in public in general on account of respecting their boundaries.

    Can’t say the same thing about you, JMJ. You seem to think that your shitting all over this forum serves some “lesson” that all of us loonatrians have somehow failed to learn…

  149. I’m changing my vote, you can’t possibly be serious. Someone be funnin’ on us.

    Duh.

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