The California recall election is coming. Will you vote for Gov. Gavin Newsom? Caitlyn Jenner? That guy with a bear? Or maybe just vote for the damn bear.
Bear won't raise your taxes. Bear won't greenlight a poorly-thought-out high-speed rail project. Bear won't violate his own mandates and eat indoors at a fancy restaurant.
He's a bear. He's just going to do bear things.
The only hole bear will dig himself is the one he sleeps in all winter long, helping conserve energy and limiting the need for rolling blackouts.
Bear doesn't want to interfere in your life. Bear doesn't want to be near people at all. You mind your business, Bear will mind his. Doesn't that sound nice for a change?
Maybe wear a bell or something, just in case.
Vote for Bear: I mean, he's already on the damn flag.
Written and produced by Meredith and Austin Bragg. Voice over by Jim Merkel.
Image credits: Renée C. Byer/TNS/Newscom; WENN / WENN English Top Features/Newscom; K.C. Alfred/ZUMAPRESS/Newscom; John Gastaldo/ZUMAPRESS/Newscom
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Ok, for a change, that was actually funny. Thumbs up!
It was barely funny.
Did you mean "bearly funny"?
It’s not funny that way.
I couldn't bear to watch it.
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I laughed at your reply and laughed/wept at the article.
The right to thump Trumps is the right to bare stumps.
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I've voted for Alfred E Neumann, Pat Paulson, and countless other worthy souls. Of course I'll vote for Bear!
Is the Pope Catholic? Does Newsom shit in the woods?
No, the Pope is a commie and Newsom regularly shits in the bed.
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That would just Bruin everything.
He'll strip government down to the bear necessities.
An ursine of the apocalypse.
^ Winner
Bearly
We have to pitch this in a way that my fellow Californians will find appealing. But a red hat on the bear and start calling him SANTA CLAWS. They’ll think they’re electing a governor who reflects the proper role of government.
Will maul millions less people than the GOPe and the Dems.
Bear Tax.
Bear might just eat your head, though.
Bear would be tough on crime.
And forest fires! Tis the season...
That's actually an improvement.
All bear lives matter
All of them? You know polar bears are white, right? Seriously unwoke, dude.
We don’t have Polar Bears in California. All our bears are dark skin—er, furred. You know who DOES have Polar Bears? Alaska, which is a red state. COINCIDENCE??????
We have black bears in NJ, but no brown bears. We also have wooly bears, which are black and orange. Does CA have any orange bears?
Not that I’ve seen....
These are Woolly Bears
Orange Bear Bad!
ABAB -- All Bears Are Bears
Beartifa is just an idea.
And bastards too...Until The Bear legalizes and solumnizes Ursine-Ursine Marriage.
I have it on good authority (anonymous sources) that the Bear has been implicated in several picnic basket thefts.
Unlicensed hunting/fishing as well....
Was boo boo just a smaller bear or was he just a juvenile?
I hear his connection to Yogi got him a job on the board of Bearisma.
He was also compromised by foreign powers using a Honey Pot trap.
Oh BOTHER!!
That was Pooh Bear, his British cousin.
If he'd have just done Amphetamine diet pills he wouldn't have got stuck in that Hunny Tree! (It was spelled that way i the book too, so Yahtzee Nazis and Scrabble Rabble GTFO!)
But did he support Bearxit?
He should have known better than to share a woman with Eric Swallwell.
Was Yogi grooming Boo Boo?
He did have a girlfriend. Cindi
There is lots of good-faith inquiry of whether he defecates in the woods.
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He'd probably be a strong advocate for the right to bear arms.
...and arm bears, too.
I like bear claws.
Very nice video.
Paula Abdul would have said with a tilt of the head: "...That's...very...creative!..."
Multiple animals have been elected as mayors including goats, dogs, and a cat. There is a town in California where a Labrador retriever has been named mayor for life.
So why not governor?
weve a child molester and slut in the white house, why not?
Pretty sure bear will gladly eat indoors at a fancy restaurant if he can get into it.
Yeah, but the bear doesn't have to worry about other patrons sharing the room. The bear can always go mask free. I'd like to see a mask-nazi take the bear to task.
I am concerned about the effects of a bear on the stock market however.
Keep 'em busy trying to run Cali.
Remy sure has let himself go during the pandemic
“At least he does it in the woods, not on the sidewalks of San Francisco.” (Possible T-shirt/bumper sticker?)
^1000+ this!
Some bad news: Bear and his kin made a mess of the Libertarian Utopia in in Grafton, NH, as documented in the book A Libertarian Walks Into A Bear.
In this case, the Libertarians were stupid for not locking their gabage cans, buying and selling bear repellant, and stocking up on 12 Double-Ought Buck. Let that be a lesson learned for future Intentional Communities.
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pitch this in a way that my fellow Californians will find appealing. But a red hat on the bear and start calling him SANTA CLAWS. They’ll think they’re electing a governor who reflects the proper role of government( https://wapexclusive.com )
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As the bumper sticker says:
Anybody but Newsom!
I've been voting Honey Badger for years, but if Bear has a chance I'll vote for him.
Honey boo boo kinda checks more boxes.
So the bear is really a businessman who habitually runs for office.
Seriously, who should a libertarian vote for in the recall? Jenner or the bear(John Cox)?
Looking at Cox's Wikipedia article, I'd vote for Jenner. I never watched the Kardashians, but at least Jenner is a successful competitor, money maker, and has the balls to switch genders.
People should know, if Newsom loses on question 1 on the ballot (which means he's gone), question 2 asks you to choose among what's expected to be a long list of candidates, with the winner decided by plurality. No surprise they don't want instant runoff or approval voting to get a winner by majority. That allows candidates to get a bunch of people to run to split the ticket against their competitors.
When the Bear starts stealing picnic baskets and giving them to other bears, then Liberals will vote for it.
Its a victimless crime, right?
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Governor Bear's lieutenant governor must be named "Boo-Boo" and Governor Bear must have qualified immunity from all park rangers.
Jenner is a manchurian candidate for RINO to prevent any non-RINO from winning.
Transsexual are mental defectives. They cant even accept the reality of biological gender.
yes. they make themselves outcasts and social deviants also, and of course its OUR fault for rejecting their sickness.
Id rather have a Bear S--t in the woods than a Biden drooling in the White House.
Love this!! In my opinion the legislators should meet every few years, it should be kind of a pain in the ass as they have work to do and it’s a nuisance to have to get to the Capital. If something major comes up meet sooner. But mini local government, County government, State , Federal year after year to write law after law why? Sit down, shut up and allow people and businesses to plan their futures without a bunch of legislation being passed just because that’s what they came here to do. We do not need full time politicians.
The biggest laugh I’ve had in quite some time is that Caitlin Jenner is possibly going to be the Gov of CA????? Hahahahaha!!! Yes. That is awesome. Life is stranger than fiction. Giving credence to the idea that nothing is worse than Newsome. Ouch.
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Love this. Time to start a write-in campaign for The Bear. Think of the fun if he actually won.
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