Heavy Medal Thunder

Color me mystified by Medalgate. Yes, John Kerry looked like a dope trying to explain exactly what he did during a 1971 act of political theater. And the universe of voters concerned about this and not already in the Bush camp is…? Whole numbers only, please.

Absent a connection to some larger theme like, oh, how Kerry spent 20 years in the Senate and did not do a damn thing, Medalgate looks to have all the legs of Slick Willie's equally hysterical I-did-not-inhale gambit. Crippling blow, that.

Let's have more stories on Kerry's wacky, loaded French-speaking wife and as a two-fer, let's get to the bottom of this Skull and Bones business. Exactly which homoerotic hazing ritual did our present and future president endure. Soggy biscuit? Baby-elephant walk? What?

Inquiring minds want to know.