Brickbat: Neither Snow nor Rain…

William White Jr., a U.S. Postal Service carrier in Florida, was arrested for trying to run over a 10-year-old boy with his postal truck because he thought the child was stealing a package. In fact, White had left the package at the wrong house, and the boy was taking it to the right house. According to the Florida Highway Patrol, when White saw the boy riding his scooter with the package, he drove toward him and ran over the scooter, only narrowly missing the boy. He then put the scooter in his postal truck and drove off. White has been charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, petit theft, and criminal mischief.

Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

I don't think it's fair to condemn his anti-porch pirate gogetitiveness just because of a single slip up.

[mad.casual]

Really, if you parse it out, the only justifiable reprisal from the kid in response to being nearly run over would've been a solitary kick to the shin in the moment. Especially given the proportionally less-lethal nature of the 1.25 ton vehicle. Two or three kicks would've been excessive, cruel and unusual.

A terse, forced, "Thank you noble social activist, for being your true self and showing me the error of my ways, the flaws of our system, and the obvious moral superiority of your preferred social order." probably being the most appropriate.

[SQRLSY]

If only William White Jr. had been an ICE agent, he'd have absolute immunity!

[Malvolio]

Yes, it’s called “petit theft” (Florida Statute § 812.014).

[Bill Poser]

Sure. It doesn't mean "petty". It means "small" as opposed to "large" as in "grand theft".