Free-Range Kids

Kind Stranger Places Roses on Car Windshields, Cops Assume It's a Sex Trafficking Thing

"Was this something heinous or was it something of a lesser nature, was it completely harmless?"

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If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it probably is a duck. But if it looks like a rose and smells like a rose, maybe it's sex trafficking?

That was the conclusion reached by police officers contacted by a manager at the Walmart in Coshocton, Ohio, who saw some people putting roses on the windshields of cars in the store's parking lot. The manager called the cops and soon an investigation was underway, according to local news.

"Was this something heinous or was it something of a lesser nature, was it completely harmless?" Deputy Chris Johnson asked.

A bunch of Walmart shoppers thought heinous. Soon so many calls were flooding in that Johnson took the bull by the long-stems and issued a warning:

On 2/15/2021 the Sheriff's Office received a call from the Walmart Security Department in regards to suspicious activity in their parking lot involving a vehicle and two, what appear to be, males looking into vehicles and placing a single red rose under the windshield wipers of those vehicles. While reviewing the Walmart Surveillance Cameras, the two unknown males are seen exiting from, what appears to be, a newer style dark gray Ford Explorer…and placing a single red rose on it. This same sequence occurs multiple times on several vehicles…

As if that wasn't scary enough, Johnson raised the terrifying prospect of human sex trafficking:

Although there have been several Facebook posts of similar instances that have happened in Ohio regarding Human Trafficking related techniques, it is unclear at this time if this incident is related to such type of crime.

Ah yes, the reliability of "several Facebook posts."

Word of the thorn thugs spread so far so fast that a woman named Brittaney Strupe read about the panic in her newsfeed—and picked up the phone.

Note, please, the day of the scary incident: February 15. Hmm. Roses… February 15… Could there possibly be some connection?

Strupe told the police that on Valentine's Day, a holiday in some parts, her fiancé had given her $300 worth of roses. The next day, as they started to wilt, she didn't want to throw them out. So she decided to give them away instead.

Strupe and her sister and daughter headed over to where they knew they'd find a lot of cars and put one rose on each windshield.

When Johnson heard the explanation, "It was a relief, and it was nice to put out that update letting the community know that it had been solved."

In that post to the pollen-petrified people of Coshocton, he explained the guerilla gifters, "never meant to alarm anyone or cause panic in our community."

And then, as if to undermine the idea that sometimes even sex traffickers take a day off, he added that it is still very important for everyone to be vigilant and aware of their surroundings and follow their gut if they ever see anything suspicious.

Like a random act of kindness.

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  1. Hopefully they were arrested for littering and vandalism. Dont put your wilted garbage on my car and scratch it up

    1. No good deed…

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    2. There you go, man! Somebody actually gets libertarianism. The lady and her kin weren’t sex traffickers, but trespassers and litterers and possibly vandals, since “every rose has it’s thorn” which can scratch car paint jobs.

      1. “Would that my prick had such sting!”
        Robin Williams

        1. The rose bush of liberty does it’s own watering if a trespasser isn’t careful.

    3. Where did you get a car windshield made out of material so soft that a thorn can scratch it?

      1. The windshield may not be scratchable, but the paint job is. And human flesh can definitely be scratched if a car owner picks up the rose. Roses can be a hazard to handle…even deadly if a person is a hemophiliac.

        Face it. The women had no damn business giving out roses on private property without permission. All the talk about sex trafficking is a shiny-thingy distracting all sides of the real issue and it’s a damn shame seeing libertarians letting themselves get distracted.

  2. In the future, everyone will be sex trafficked for 15 minutes.

  3. If it was done by Pepe Le Pew, it might very well have been a sex thing.

    1. Is Pepe Le Pew related to Pepe the Alt-Right Frog?

      1. Pepe the frog is the logical evolution of Pepe Le Pew.

        1. Well “it could be…” Keep a sharp lookout, and for Gods sake, if you see something SAY SOMETHING!

          1. Yes, if you see violation of private property rights, say something, first to the perp, then to the police if you need back-up. Simple libertarian philosophy.

  4. Deputy Chris Johnson

    AKA “Karen”

    1. Wrongly placed nickname. The “Karens” are the women who thought they were entitled to distribute roses on private property without the owner’s permission.

  5. Paranoia will out.

  6. Folks may want to petal sex slaves, but wasting time to investigate this is not a thorny issue. Authorities failed to stem any sex slavery from occurring; numbers rose while on this distraction.

    1. Everyone knows that child sex slaves are kept under the ovens of pizza shops, not in the back rooms of florist stores.

    2. Hey bud, it’s time to leave.

    3. Very clever, word smith. But, as everyone just knows, if there was no white van there could not have been any sex trafficking.

    4. Me, I was borned and raised in da briar patch, ’cause it’ll give trespassers ‘levity-leven thorns in their asses. And I’s stays the Hell outta other folkses’ briar patches too.

      If people respected boundaries like this, sex trafficking of the innocent and unwilling would not be a thing.

    5. Well, that’s florid language.

  7. Why do alleged sex trafficking always occur at Walmarts, not Targets?

    1. One of the symptoms of government expansion is lower standards.

    2. Because sex slave people of Walmart has a website and Target don’t?

    3. They were all burned down?

    4. Target is right behind Walmart and ahead of Ikea for alleged child sex-trafficking kidnappers.

      1. Harris-Teeter Grocery Stores makes their literature, distribution, and solicitations policies very clear when you come in their door. They don’t play and their parking lots and store interiors are clutter-free and immaculate!

        Pricey, but a pleasant experience, and Harris-Teeter’s policies are a model for other stores as well.

  8. Just goes to show that work expands to fill the time and resources available.

    1. Hell yeah; all the way from your board of county supervisors, to the cops, the governors office, the federal bureaucracy, and to the halls of congress.

      And the better things get, in terms of any thing, the more they will find to do.

    2. And then it expands just a little bit more.

  9. Why didn’t the store manger just ask what they were doing. lots of problems solved but everyone one is so afraid to talk or ask so they always call the cops. lucky no one got shot for placing roses, cops might be allergic

    1. True, talking to the perp and telling them not to trspass is the route of first resort, but except for diWhite KnightOxide and myself, nobody yet appears to recognize private property rights.

      1. Whose property rights are you arguing for exactly? The property rights of the person who owns the roses they are giving away? Or the property rights of the store that maintain the parking lot. Or the property rights of the car owner? It’s all well and good to say that ‘mah purpety rghts’ but there’s a lot of property in the story, and it’s not like there is intentional destruction happening in any of it.

        Did any of the people who received a rose complain about scratches? Compared to what undoubtedly happens a dozen times day in a parking lot of a stray shopping cart scratching the side of car? You left your car in a semi-public space. You may be annoyed someone tried to do something nice for you that you don’t appreciate, but that does not mean they are in the wrong, just because you have got a stick up your ass.

        1. The property rights being violated here are those of the store and of the employees and customers with vehicles in the parking lot. And the store owner is at least civilly liable for the property and safety of persons on the premises.

          The roses could attract bees, to which people on the property could have deadly allergies. The roses could attract other vermin as they decay if they are left behind.

          Moreover, if people think they can just give out roses without the owner’s permission and create this kind of hazard, others may see this as a green light to do the same.

          This would include people littering the place with religious tracts, pro-union leaflets, political campaign materiels, racist/anti-Semitic/xenophobic/homophobic or other hate propaganda, even flyers advertising other stores and business.

          Hare Krishnas in particular give out flowers and they may be attracted to the store by the sight of the woman giving out roses. Every trip to the store would become like a visit to the airport!

          And all of this would attract litterbugs and people who do things like: panhandle and frighten the customers,
          do drugs,
          solicit vice and put the store at risk for closing and forfeiture,
          abandon their pets,
          dump the corpses of their dead fighting dogs,
          or even abandon vehicles that sit there for months with who-knows-inside e.g. rats drawn to food inside, stolen property, a bomb set by a terrorist, even dead bodies in the trunk!

          As both a retail customer and a retail employee, I really have seen just about all of that! And what I haven’t seen is easily conceivable and probable, especially in this broken-window, concrete-jungle, true-crime TV, post-9/11 world in which we live!

          Yep, I do have a stick up my ass about private property rights and I got it fair and square.

          But to demonstrate some compassion, I would at least make the woman and her kin some suggestions for use of the roses before I shooed them off the property.

          She could eat the rose hips for Vitamin C, use the petals in bath water, give bouquets to friends and neighbors near her home, donate them to brighten up homeless shelters or orphanages, lay them at the tombs and graves of veterans, anything but give them out on property without the owner’s consent. There are ways of doing good deeds that really are good and not just well-meaning.

  10. I think it was Shakespeare who wrote, “A rose by any other name is still sex trafficking.” Something like that anyway.

    1. I think it was “sex trafficking by any other name would smell the same”.

  11. My guess is that it was a disgruntled florist who called the cops, somebody who didn’t appreciate the competition. It’s like giving the homeless guy outside the McDonalds a Whopper instead of a Big Mac, they don’t like that shit.

  12. So what are private property rights, folks, chopped liver???

    If you don’t recognize and respect private property rights, regardless of your age, you are Not-Ready-For-Prime-Time-Free-Ranging!

    By the way, do you you know who else gave away things like literature on private property without the private property owner’s consent? And do you know who else had the letters “NAZ” in ther name?

    1. Sort of like you posting here without getting the consent of the authors of the article… Some people might not find your point compelling. Some may argue they even take mental grief and anguish from the argument. So whose right exactly is supposed to be respected here?

      1. Reason Magazineowns the servers and the comment section. If they ask me to get off, or all of us to get off, I will respect their wishes about their property.

        Likewise, the store owners own their parking lot and I would respect their wishes about their property too. Quite simple.

        1. So you know, folks: This is the harder side of liberty, which is responsibility, the side that people fear.

  13. “it is unclear at this time if this incident is related to such type of crime.”

    How about those alleged girl scouts “selling cookies” outside the supermarket? “It is unclear at this time if this incident is related to a prostitution ring.”

    1. Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts, assuming they and Scoutmasters are taught right, always ask permission of property owners before selling cookies.

      Of course, judging from the late-night attorney commercials, scouting has problems all by itself in this regard, with or without cookie sales or parking lot roes distribution.

  14. I would advise these people to continue sheltering in place.
    Indefinitely.

    1. I would advise that people who can’t respect private property rights be chased off the premises. Permanently.

  15. What’s really fascinating is that the Sherlock and Watson of the Coshocken police department were able, after carefully reviewing security tapes, to describe how two males were “seen exiting from, what appears to be, a newer style dark gray Ford Explorer…and placing a single red rose on it. This same sequence occurs multiple times on several vehicles”. While such a description is a bit confusing in itself (did this same pair of males exit several vehicles and put a rose on them? where did they get them?), it does offer the reader a good idea of the acute observations of these dicks.

  16. Waaw Nice article , I found a very good Best Red Rose that is very beautiful and it’s very fantastic.

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