Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Is Wrong About a Lot of Things. But She's Right About Fresh Juice in Cocktails.

This is why it's important to have subject matter experts in Congress.

|

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is wrong about a lot of things: She's wrong about the Green New Deal, wrong about climate doom, wrong about taxes, wrong about Medicare for All, wrong about federal debt and spending, and wrong about plastic bags, just for starters.

But the former bartender is right—so very, very right—about using fresh juice in cocktails.

This is why it's important to have subject matter experts with real-world experience in Congress, folks.

Okay, okay, I don't actually want to ban sour mix—and from the winking emoji, neither does she—but the stuff is an abomination, and there's almost never a call for using it in a drink, except possibly to be ironic. 

You should always squeeze fresh citrus for your drinks. This doesn't need to be a federal law, but it is an important part of my personal code. Try a margarita with fresh lime juice and 100 percent agave tequila on a hot summer day. It'll change your life

More seriously, if you want to understand AOC's appeal as a politician and public personality, it's this: She uses online platforms like Twitter quite effectively by talking about things that are fun and trivial, helping to define her as something more than just another stodgy politician, as well as to draw attention to bigger, bolder, and more important ideas. Like using fresh juice in cocktails. 

NEXT: No "Tone-Policing," Says a Court

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

    1. this might be the first time she’s said anything that wasn’t written by other people – well probably not, she’s not clever enough to come up with even this on her own

      do you guys realize she was hired through a huge casting call? she could not be less qualified

  1. AOC also agrees with us Koch / Reason libertarians on #AbolishICE.

    #LibertariansForAOC

    1. I’ll bet she k own quite a bit about sucking cock as well. I would like to hear her opine, in detail, about that.

      Or she could just show me.

      1. As much as Kamala Harris?

      2. Hah, nice one dude!

      3. Your typing seems to be suffering. One-handed?

    2. How are you going to make a margarita without ice?

  2. I do not think this is an issue that falls under the authority of the federal government.

    1. Since when has that mattered? Not different than ol broad-shoulder’s scheme to revamp the lunch menu in middle schools.

    2. That is precisely why we need subject matter experts in Congress. They are the ones who can understand why some clunky bureaucrats and dumb pols making deals and grandstanding cannot possibly do better. Stupid people who know nothing will always just go along with some loudmouth who seems to have a vague idea.

      Course there is zero possibility of getting subject matter experts in Congress without eliminating elections (which only ensure too many lawyers) and replacing that with sortition (random selection – similar to jury pools).

      And need a much bigger Congress to ensure that that randomness delivers enough subject expertise so it isn’t reliant on a single expert. AOC’s expertise comes from one of the more common jobs in the US. But Congress should also have truck drivers, accountants, first-line supervisors, software developers, bill collectors, plumbers, insurance sales, etc.

  3. Ahh yes, fun and trivial…. Like the glories of bankrupting the county, joining people together to hate on jews and the evil whites, and the beauty of late term abortion… So much fun to be had

  4. This s the best argument I have heard for a federal job guarantee. She would be assigned as a bartender, and we would all be more free.

    1. I’ll bet her jokes suck.

  5. But when AOC’s Progressive compatriots take over, you will be required to use only fresh fruit juice in your cocktails…and like it.

    AOC/Daenerys Targaryen knows what’s best for you, and you’ll do it or face the dragon fire.

  6. I’ll put some fresh juice in your sour.

    1. That is by far the most unattractive picture of her that I’ve seen.

      1. In 10 years that’s what she’ll look like all the time.

      2. Not really that different from any other…

  7. I’ll bet she doesn’t even know how to make a screaming Viking, or whether to ask the patron if they want the cucumber bruised, or not.

    1. +1 Cliff and Norm

  8. This is literally the only subject she can speak with authority on. If she is able to up the cocktail game at just a few bars in this country I’ll be happy.

    Too bad people listen to her on everything else.

    1. > This is literally the only subject she can speak with authority on.

      Because it’s the only thing that she’s ever done out in the real world.

      1. It’s almost like there’s a relationship between the two things, and that people should only speak on subjects they actually understa–naaah.

      2. I’ll bet she knows a lot about giving head. Probably to both men and women.

        1. Doubling down on the oral joke? That’s a ballsy move man! High-five!

  9. You deserve so much better than what you’re settling for ????

    If she’s so smart about this, why is this a question?

    1. Or does 4 question marks make a crying face?

  10. “Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.” — Mark Twain

  11. She has reached her zenith.

    1. That puts her in far better position than that of her political opponents, who have been getting stomped in the culture war for decades and are relegated to pining impotently and bitterly for illusory good old days as America improves against their wishes and efforts.

      1. Congressperson advocates for fresh juice in cocktails.
        So much improvement!

  12. Well, this article certainly validates the “cocktail party” appellation given to Reason’s libertarianism.

  13. Finally found something she’s good at. Make her the chairperson of the House Refreshments Committee. Or Nancy’s personal barmaid.

  14. No, no, no, no. If fresh juice is (1) good for the people, (2) more natural, and (3) a defiance of corporations, then IT MUST BE MANDATED BY FEDERAL LAW. And probably paid for with a tax on cocktails prepared on yachts.

    You guys are misled if you think Occasional Cortex is kidding.

    1. Nobody needs 27 different type of lemons, or orange and lime wedges…

  15. >>>She uses online platforms like Twitter quite effectively by talking about things that are fun and trivial

    exactly. necessary in a congressman.

  16. There is nothing stopping Congresspersons from becoming material experts on topics. Most choose not to.

    AOC is discussing stupid topics that have zero relevance to national or NY politics. She is a waste of space.

    1. Well she also discusses topics on Twitter that are well beyond her area of expertise, like the wage-value of workers. She seems to think Supply and Demand are White Supremacist economics or something.

  17. Wait, doesn’t she also use her Twitter to push out her Doomsday scenarios that we’re 12 years away from full environmental collapse? And to make ridiculous, out-of-touch statements like, “If JFK Airport can sell pastries for $8, then surely paying workers a reasonable wage is possible!”

    Just because she also makes some pithy comments about things she actually knows doesn’t mean she’s really using Twitter properly.

  18. “She uses online platforms like Twitter quite effectively by talking about things that are fun and trivial, helping to define her as something more than just another stodgy politician, as well as to draw attention to bigger, bolder, and more important ideas.”

    You know who else?

  19. But how does she feel about olive juice in martinis?

    1. dirty.

  20. This is why it’s important to have subject matter experts in Congress.

    Subject matter experts: They who agree with you.

  21. A shit-faced Suderman walks into a bar and orders a drink.
    The bartender Alexandria Oyster-Cult sez: “Choo wanna lemon juice or sour?”
    The drunken big shot slurs: “Squeeze the lemon til the juice runs down your leg, chica.”
    AOC giggles: “Oh, papi!”
    Suderman goes home with a Koch/Reason libertarian trans.

    1. >>>Suderman goes home with a Koch/Reason libertarian trans.

      queue the Kinks.

  22. most cosmotarian article ever

    “Try a margarita with fresh lime juice and 100 percent agave tequila on a hot summer day. It’ll change your life. ”

    As a former bartender, I can attest that fresh lime juice is way better. But I’m sorry, it won’t change your life. Adding a wheat beer or saison to the margarita though…..

  23. Clearly a ploy for a jobs program, we will now need more fruit trees and fruit tree pickers, across the land.

  24. Next she’s gonna mandate that all bud light be the lime variety.

  25. No sour mix for you.. By the time she’s done with you there’ll be no fruit, alcohol or TP, let alone sour mix.

  26. “Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Is Wrong About a Lot of Things.”

    Such as economics, which she earned a degree in.

    1. She ha a degree in economics. there is no empirical evidence that she earned it.
      #nobcdegreecounts

  27. It’s good to know we can find common ground, even with someone I disagree with as much as I disagree with AOC.

    Opponents aren’t evil people, they’re just horribly misguided.

    1. Opponents can, in fact, be evil people.

      1. As can allies.

  28. She is still and always will be the stupidest thing ever to grace the halls of Congress! MAGA…Make America Great Again…make AOC bartend again!

  29. “She uses online platforms like Twitter quite effectively by talking about things that are fun and trivial, helping to define her as something more than just another stodgy politician, as well as to draw attention to bigger, bolder, and more important ideas. Like using fresh juice in cocktails. ”

    Wow! And all this time I thought she was a shallow person. Who would have thunk.

  30. I have no doubt Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is a smart young person. Check out her video repotting a plant as she explains the census. She has both an education and real world experience. Being a bartender probably taught her communication skills you can’t get in a classroom at any college.

  31. You should always squeeze fresh citrus for your drinks. This doesn’t need to be a federal law, but it is an important part of my personal code. Try a margarita with fresh lime juice and 100 percent agave tequila on a hot summer day. It’ll change your life.

    And because I like it, it’s the right thing for everybody!

    — Peter Suderman, “Libertarian”

  32. Finally something within her realm of knowledge and expertise.

  33. “Try a margarita with fresh lime juice and 100 percent agave tequila on a hot summer day.”

    When I make margaritas, and when I do it’s usually for a bunch of people, so it’s a large batch, I like a 50/50 mix of Simply Lime Limeade and Simply Lemon Lemonade. Throw in a small amount of fresh lime juice on top. Also, using fairly cheap tequila makes them taste stronger.

  34. Dear Diary,

    Writing articles is such a pain, especially on a Friday, so today I’ll just fangirl over my *favorite* socialist.

    Hugs and kisses,
    Me

Please to post comments

Comments are closed.