Pence Arrives in Asia, Biden Calls Trump a 'Joke', Road Trip in Space: P.M. Links

• 

  SpaceX

  Leaders of both parties in the Senate arrived a two-year budget deal.

• Vice President Pence arrived in Japan ahead of the Olympics opening ceremonies in South Korea later this week.
• Joe Biden called President Trump a "joke" in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous.
• White House staff secretary Rob Porter has resigned after two ex-wives accused him of abuse.
• At least six people are dead after a magnitude-6.4 earthquake in Taiwan.
• SpaceX is livestreaming the Starman mannequin's Tesla Roadster ride in space.

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

Leaders of both parties in the Senate arrived a two-year budget deal.

Bipartisan = fiscal restraint.

[Chipper Morning Baculum]

Man, these links suck. I predict a very low comment count unless someone post something personal or really controversial.

[Fist of Etiquette]

It’s a poor comment carpenter who blames his Links.

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

ABORTIONIMMIGRATIONOBAMAMUELLER

[Ed]

Thanks man

[Entropy Drehmaschine Void]

Ed has caught “The Britches”.

Wonder who is next.

[Rufus The Monocled]

Hello.

“Joe Biden called President Trump a “joke” in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous.”

It takes a joker to know one, right?

/high five.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Vice President Pence arrived in Japan…

Making sure the geisha’s have chaperones.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Geisha’s what, you ask? Use your imagination. Perverts.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Joe Biden called President Trump a “joke” in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous.

Yeah, it’s pretty much jokes all the way down.

[Citizen X - #6]

Leaders of both parties in the Senate arrived a two-year budget deal.

Current can status: kicked

[Derp-o-Matic 6000]

Nonsense, there will be plenty of opportunities to raise spending even further during that period.

[silver.]

Congress’ spendingfest destiny.

[Fist of Etiquette]

White House staff secretary Rob Porter has resigned after two ex-wives accused him of abuse.

Attention women marrying Porter: Fool you once, shame on him. Fool you twice…

[Fist of Etiquette]

SpaceX is livestreaming the Starman mannequin’s Tesla Roadster ride in space.

1970’s NASA is wondering what that sentence means.

[Pro Libertate]

I’m dubious about the claim that mannequins can own property.

[Unicorn Abattoir]

What about mannequins that come to life in a crappy ’80s movie?

[Pro Libertate]

Okay, she can own property. Is that her in orbit? Curious that SpaceX hasn’t revealed the identity of the mannequinaut.

[SQRLSY One]

“…the car was blasting David Bowie’s “Life on Mars” as it travels through the solar system.”

I thought that “in space, no one can hear you scream?” Vacuum transmits NO sound… Has SpaceX found a violation of this principle? If we can hear good music, while NOT hearing all of the screaming … (Especially about abortions, immigration, and Mexican thick-crust-pizza-ass-sex, around here, I might add)… Then that would be a WAAAY good thing! HOW does Space-X DOOO that?!?!?

Inquiring minds want to KNOW, dammit!!!!

[Pro Libertate]

Lots of unanswered questions.

[Mickey Rat]

Sound does conduct through solids.

However, it is a hell of a long way to the next recharge station.

[cgr2727]

Said Fat Tony to Elon: “Yo, Elon, how’s about youse let me launch this here rolled-up carpet that I was just gonna put in the trunk of my car and dump in Jersey instead?”

[Mock-star]

Its just lawn clippings Lou

[completely impervious]

the apostrophe shows possession, not ownership

[Mickey Rat]

Some call him “Tom”.

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

Very few will probably recall this bit of ’00s comedy gold

[Sevo]

The legacy press remains focused on the important issues and the big picture:

“Strange video of Donald Trump’s gravity-defying hair goes viral”
[…]
“Photos and videos captured of the moment appear to show the president’s combed-over strands coming loose from his scalp. The golden hair sheath seems to defy gravity, hovering at an angle that violates ordinary hair follicle physics.”
http://www.sfgate.com/national…..558971.php

Front page “news” to the Chron e-edition.

[Chipper Morning Baculum]

The Hair vs The Coif. Who would win?

[Derp-o-Matic 6000]

That’s real, serious news, Sevo. Stop wanting democracy to die in darkness!

[Chipper Morning Baculum]

You know what else dies in darkness?

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

Speoplatyrhinus poulsoni?

[Chipper Morning Baculum]

That’s pretty cool.

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

Coolness just sloughs off of me as I walk by.

[completely impervious]

Among other things.

[SQRLSY One]

The Donald’s Hair responds to Quantum Physics Mysteries, Truth Be Told!

If’n The Donald’s Hairs wave in the wind, and NO cameras record the event… Did The Donald’s Hairs REALLY wave in the wind? Or did their wave-in-the-wind functions collapse into another dimension? Beyond space and time, perhaps?!?!

NO ONE (besides MEEEEEE) knows the REAL Truth… And I am NOT telling!!!

(Grease my palms with some freedoms from Government Almighty, and I MIGHT tell…)

[silver.]

Nobody produces that currency.

[SQRLSY One]

Sad to say, MeThinks ye are correct…

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

No, those are more of a spraying motion. Like a truck driving through a big puddle of mud. Only the mud is white.

[Citizen X - #6]

Plants?

[Rich]

Are we talking, um, the *little* death?

[Pro Libertate]

That brings total obliteration?

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

Ninja?

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

Stars!

[Libertarian]

He should shave his head, a la Britany Spears, and tell the press, “You fake news guys apparently think my hair is important, but there are issues out there that you aren’t covering. Ignore the trivial stuff and get to work!”

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

White House staff secretary Rob Porter has resigned after two ex-wives accused him of abuse

“So, when did you…”

[Pro Libertate]

SpaceX is overshooting its intended trajectory. It’s orbit will now extend into the asteroid belt.

I’ve been thinking that the spacecraft should be called Heavy Metal I.

[Libertymike]

We need more unfettered expositors of liberty like Arvin Vohra, not those who kneel to mass murderers, like Larry Sharpe.

[Chipper Morning Baculum]

Wrong thread?

[Unlabelable MJGreen]

Is this a bit?

[Libertymike]

Too much?

Perhaps.

[Domestic Dissident]

Of course it goes without saying that Reason will either ignore some of these revealed messages between the cretinous FBI agents, or just dismiss them as yet another big old “nothingburger”.

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

So I haven’t been sending non-federally mandated employees for drug screens which I’m supposed to do according to company policy. But I had no oversight and got corrupted by power and so I haven’t sent myself or any other non-DOT office drone in for a screen in many months — really just shoddy, incomplete records for years actually.

CFO just came up to my desk and asked why any corporate employees haven’t been randomly selected in a while (the last safety guy was an ex-Cop hard ass).

Question: can a white man say he won’t perpetuate the racist drug war? Otherwise I don’t have many defensible options. : /

[silver.]

This is a pinch. He’s the CFO, use the cost savings argument. Slingin’ piss under a mass spec. ain’t cheap.

[Ken Shultz]

“Joe Biden called President Trump a “joke” in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous”

Want to hear a joke about Biden?

What should your wife do if she sees strangers coming down the driveway?

Punchline:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIuk3G9Xixc

It’s funny ’cause it’s true!

[Rich]

Joe Biden called President Trump a “joke” in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous.

It’s jokes all the way down!

[Mickey Rat]

“I know you are, but what am I?”

“That does not even make sense, Joe.”

[Rebel Scum]

Joe Biden called President Trump a “joke”

Pot, meet Kettle.

in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous.

I believe he was being tongue-in-cheek, but mobilizing the federal government to spy on political opponents and quash a legit investigation into malfeasance in federal communications and records retention should at least have people going to jail, even if it is not explicitly treason.

[damikesc]

Joe Biden called President Trump a “joke” in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous.

I would’ve said “no”, but I do have to pay homage to Biden’s expertise on the subject of being a joke and consider it may be the truth.

[Libertarian]

Biden needs to shut up and crawl under a rock. Like Weinstein, everybody knows about him. Unlike Weinstein, evidence such as what is seen at the link has not gained traction.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwXweiRjckI

[Rufus The Monocled]

I think the Colts got themselves a blessing in disguise.

[creech]

Joe Biden probably gets high every night trying to forget that he should have jumped into the 2016 race for the nomination. As the incumbent v.p. he probably beats a baggage-laden Hillary and manages to defeat Trump.

[lap83]

Didn’t he announce that he wouldn’t run after his son died? I respect him for that, at least he seemed to have a life outside of politics…which is way more than you can say for “It’s her teerrrrn!!!!11”

[Crusty Juggler]

Hillary spends a lot of time hiking.

[The Last American Hero]

Well, you don’t move to fast on a hike when you have to stop every 15 minutes and spit up a phlegm-ball, and the secret service guys get tired from carrying her passed out carcass around when she has a seizure, so it takes longer than most people for her to hike.

[Rich]

Texts between FBI lovers reveal Obama wanted to be briefed on EVERYTHING

“Oh, come on, Mr. President — give us some space!”

[completely impervious]

“He likes a finger in the bum”

[Mickey Rat]

“I just want to watch.”

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

White House staff secretary Rob Porter has resigned after two ex-wives accused him of abuse.

Bring back the Mooch! He died before his time. Dank memes are screaming in the void of eternity.

[Crusty Juggler]

Finally, the truth is out:
Richard Pryor Widow Says Yes, He Did Bang Brando … And There’s No Shame

[Crusty Juggler]

As for Richard hooking up with Brando — she says, “It was the ’70s! Drugs were still good, especially quaaludes. If you did enough cocaine, you’d f*** a radiator and send it flowers in the morning.”

Who says you have to be in the 70s for that to happen?

[LeRoi]

I always found coke to be a double edged sword, makes you very horny, but the junk doesn’t work right.

[BestUsedCarSales]

I hear that.

[silver.]

Used car salesman uses coke.

Checks out.

[GILMORE?]

“Joe Biden called President Trump a “joke” in response to the suggestion Trump was joking about calling Democrats treasonous.”

‘Yeah, well your face is a joke’

(hi fives ezra klein)

[Crusty Juggler]

EXCLUSIVE: Hope Hicks’ new boyfriend Rob Porter RESIGNS from White House after BOTH ex-wives accuse him of abuse – including one who told DailyMail.com that he CHOKED and PUNCHED her

Hope Hicks is a goddess who dates scummy, average-looking men.

I love her.

[silver.]

Crusty giving us the links we really want to see.

[Crusty Juggler]

You’re welcome.

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

You know that scene in Unbroken where a line of dudes are forced to punch the Olympian in the face… This punishment should be adopted, except the line should be replaced with people who want to do the punching. And Olympians should be replaced with dirt bags.

[Crusty Juggler]

What two things do Trump and Big Ern’ McCracken have in common?

[Crusty Juggler]

Send this monster to Gitmo for defiling a national treasure!!!!!

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

See my Unbroken movie link above. These men are the scum of the earth.

[Crusty Juggler]

Hollywood’s Most Toxic Bromance: The Implosion of Charlie Sheen and Lenny Dykstra

Dykstra, 54, nicknamed “Nails” decades ago for his relentlessness on the field ? parts of five seasons with the New York Mets and eight with the Philadelphia Phillies ? isn’t done. He goes on to float that Sheen was involved in the sudden death of a member of his own inner circle and beat his pregnant ex-fiancee. The 52-year-old Sheen, says Dykstra, is not simply the drug-addled clown the tabloids have been feasting on for years but is truly dangerous.

Dykstra is going public now with this new info about Sheen, he says, because he’s genuinely sickened by the worst of the actor’s behavior. “I am not a saint, but I will not tolerate a man beating a woman,” he says. Still, under questioning, another motive emerges.

[Crusty Juggler]

Dykstra was friendly with Sheen for more than two decades, eventually joining his core clique. Now he’s excommunicated. His allegations against Sheen are telling; his willingness to share them even more so. The doomed bromance of Lenny and Charlie is a glimpse into the hedonistic lure of a real-life Entourage, only sadder, more desperate and ultimately damned ? a cautionary tale about Hollywood alpha-male bonding at its most decadent and damaging.

Never have friends, people.

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

Do not presume to assume that I need to be told.

[Stormy Dragon]

Not to be confused with the bromance between Charlie Sheen and Edsger Dijkstra, which was both graphic and massively concurrent.

[Crusty Juggler]

Teacher: It’s unconstitutional to prohibit sex with students

A former teacher in Alabama is fighting for her right to have sex with students.

Charli Jones Parker, 31, was convicted of having intercourse with two male 16-year-old students while she was a teacher at Pickens Academy. Now she wants her case overturned, claiming that a law prohibiting sex with students is unconstitutional, according to Tuscaloosa News.

Her appeal comes after a Morgan County Circuit Court judge ruled in August that the law violated an equal protection clause which affords teachers the same treatment in court as other professions.

Parker’s attorney argued in a brief filed Tuesday that her conviction should be appealed on the same grounds.

This is the world libertarians want.

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

First let me gauge how hot the teacher is.

[Leo Kovalensky]

PASS

[Bearded Spock]

You have to look at her the way a nerdy 16 year-old male virgin would look at her.

By that standard, she’s smoking hot.

[Libertymike]

Its the world we will never have if the likes of Larry Sharpe continue to appease statists.

[Crusty Juggler]

This Mutant Crayfish Clones Itself, and It’s Taking Over Europe

Red Skull’s plan is working!

[Griffin3]

Are they edible?

[Crusty Juggler]

‘Law & Order: SVU’ star announces run for Congress

“I’m a little Libertarian, I’m a lot liberal, mostly progressive, but I have this amazing ability to be able to take really complicated policy and break it down into edible sound bites, which is something most progressive liberals cannot do,” Neal told the Daily Freeman.”

[Half-Virtue, Half-Vice]

So mostly progressive?

[Libertymike]

And of her own branding / making, not just the one conceived for her SVU role by Dick Wolf.

[Unlabelable MJGreen]

I have this amazing ability to be able to take really complicated policy and break it down into edible sound bites, which is something most progressive liberals cannot do

Unlike Libertarians.

[Leo Kovalensky]

Fuck you, cut spending?

[Crusty Juggler]

On Northern Syria Front Line, U.S. and Turkey Head Into Tense Face-off

If the message to Turkey was not clear already, the overall coalition commander accompanying General Jarrard, Lt. Gen. Paul Funk, elaborated. “You hit us, we will respond aggressively. We will defend ourselves.”

The trip was the first by such senior United States military officers to the front in northern Syria since Turkey’s president threatened to attack the city of Manbij, calling it a bastion of terrorists and demanding that American forces leave.

But the Americans have refused, creating the potential for an unprecedented armed conflict between two NATO allies, the United States and Turkey ? the latest twist on the seven-year-old war in Syria.

Oh boy.

[Crusty Juggler]

The two generals arrived at the border post in unarmored cars, in an entourage that included several mine-resistant armored personnel carriers, as well as Land Cruisers for Special Forces soldiers, with antennas, spare tires and jerrycans on their roofs.

I guess we aren’t buying American anymore.

[Griffin3]

Never get into a land war in western asia?

[Tony]

Democrat flips a +18 Trump district in MIssouri. In a good economy! Trump should soon consider trying the “I’m not actually a fucking lunatic” strategy he no doubt has in his back pocket.

[Juice]

WHOA!

[Don't look at me.]

So now the greasy hillbillies know what they are doing?

[Tony]

Of course not. They’re just disappointed in their man what with his being a horrifying global embarrassment, and they’re letting normal people outvote them.

[Bearded Spock]

Oh, Tony, Tony, Tony.

There is no doubt that the Democrat base is more motivated to vote right now, and in obscure, off-year special elections with low turnout that has clearly made a difference.

But if you think that a 108-vote victory in a state legislative district that voted for Trump by a +18 margin means 1) this guy will vote like a progressive, 2) he even has a prayer of winning the next time, and 3) this will translate over into the November general election, then you’ve been eating too many Tide pods.

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS EATING TOO MANY TIDE PODS

I WILL NOT STAND, SIT, OR LIE IN A PRONE POSITION FOR THIS ABUSE

[Tony]

One can always hope that Americans will retain the memory of the fucktastically gobsmacking shitshow that is the Trump Republican party longer than they did the previous incarnation under Bush.

[Rockabilly]

Russian comedians prank phone call U.S. Representative Adam Schiff

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5waop30577A