Why Won't the FDA Let Me Shove Chocolate Up My Nose?
The nanny state may force snortable cacao off the market.

The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) is going after a company that makes chocolate you can snort like snuff.
The FDA has sent a warning letter to the makers of Coco Loko, a snortable powder made from cacao, about how they were marketing and labeling their products.
Part of the complaint is stupid nanny-state nonsense. The makers of Coco Loko deliberately market themselves as an alternative to prohibited street drugs. In its complaint, the FDA absurdly complains that marketing Coco Loko as an alternative to drugs encourages the use of illegal drugs:
"As a physician and a parent, I'm deeply troubled by the unlawful marketing of these potentially dangerous products, especially since they are so easily accessible by minors. Encouraging the use of snortable chocolate as an alternative to illegal street drugs is not acceptable—there are very real consequences to snorting any powder, not to mention the societal dangers of promoting drug abuse,"' said FDA Commissioner Scott Gottlieb, M.D. "At a time where drug addiction is threatening the fabric of American society, we must take action when we see efforts that may further fuel illicit drug abuse. We'll continue to vigorously target bad actors that sell unapproved products, including products that contain undeclared drug ingredients."
The FDA also claims that using Coco Loko can trigger vocal cord spasms and exacerbate asthma. And it notes that the product includes taurine and guarana—ingredients common to energy drinks—that have not been evaluated for intranasal consumption.
The FDA further warns that another product by the company—Legal Lean Syrup, a grape-flavored drink with herbal supplements—also contains a drug ingredient, doxylamine, that is not declared on labeling. That's a little bit more of a serious concern, as that drug is an ingredient in over-the-counter sleep aids and consumers might want to know that.
Finally, the FDA objects to either product being sold as "dietary supplements."
It looks like, in the end, the only thing the FDA isn't concerned about is people snorting chocolate. The FDA's response to Coco Loko's manufacturer, Arco Globus Trading, isn't as severe as it could have been, but that's because this hasn't reached the "enforcement" stage yet. The FDA is giving the company 15 days to explain how it's going fix all these problems. It isn't specifically telling the company that these products themselves are illegal…yet.
Nevertheless, the company has shut down its shop on the web, so you cannot buy the stuff online anymore. That will no doubt please fearmongering nannies like Sen. Chuck Schumer (D–N.Y.), who started screaming over the summer that the FDA needs to do something about Coco Loco.
Like Gottlieb, Schumer leaned heavily on the complaint that the product was "easily accessible" to minors. As I noted at the time, a container with 10 doses was selling for $20 dollars. That made it fairly expensive, and it seems to me that it's unlikely to actually appeal to children, particularly since they could just buy an energy drink or a candy bar. Or both!
We'll have to wait and see if the company can able to handle all the labeling/marketing issues to the FDA's satisfaction. But I suspect the nannies have won this fight.
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C'mon Scott, you know the reason...
As always, it's the FYTW clause.
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Real original, fuckface.
Cacao to the insults.
Coco Loko
Coko Loko
Coko Loco
Alright, what is this shit actually called?
Skott is playing cosmo games with us.
Like Gottlieb, Schumer leaned heavily on the complaint that the product was "easily accessible" to minors.
Do you know who else was "easily accessible" to minors?
Roy Moore?
Real original, fuckface.
Hey, Hugh. Psst. Hugh.
[sips beverage]
Up yours, Hugh.
Roy Moore?
Real original, fuckface.
Real original, fuckface.
Cacao to the insults.
I'm the real original, fuckface.
Sam Dykstra?
Principal Rooney from Ferris Bueller's Day Off?
Rooney eats it.
Rob Lowe?
The Prophet Muhammad?
Charlie Sheen?
Jimmy Webb?
Jerry Lee Lewis?
Elvis Presley?
Errol Flynn?
Kevin Spacey?
Canaries?
Luc Besson?
Mozart?
Crusty, while on a weekend bender?
Anthropology?
Roger Moore?
You aren't free unless you're free to be a goddamn idiot.
It's like society's idiots are trying to crawl out of the gene pool but we keep pulling them back in.
You aren't free unless you're free to be a goddamn idiot.
Thanks for proving my point!
Twice proven. This whole site is an example.
Scott,
I think you should revisit the river in Missouri with all the Nazi Skinheads and bring along some of this. Great follow up story. Bring some weeeeed and messicans too. I bet the ass sex will be a foregone conclusion, they may close their eyes the first time.
The 31st Century is more enlightened:
Pop a Poppler in your mouth,
When you come to Fishy Joe's,
What they're made of is a mystery,
Where they come from, no one knows,
You can pick 'em,
You can lick 'em,
You can chew 'em,
You can stick 'em,
If you promise not to sue us,
You can shove one up your nose.
What I get out if this is that the makers of Coko Loko think that people who are intrigued about using illegal substances are extremely gullible.