The Dark Trump Rises

Trumps inaugural address was different, to be sure.

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Missed Trump's first speech as president? No problem, here's the highlight!

NEXT: President Trump Already Signed a Bunch of Executive Orders, Some Rioting in D.C.: P.M. Links

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  1. Proud to be a patriotic American!

  2. Does this mean there are now 2 open seats on SCOTUS?

  3. So it begins,the Trump wars.

    1. Didn’t that start when the Russians hacked hillary’s optiplex 780 in her basement, allowing the American people a glimpse into the awfulness of characters running our lives?

      1. That was all a plan by the Trump Lord to stir chaos during his rise to power.

    2. I hope it comes out for the PS4.

      1. Gozer the Traveller! He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of the Vuldronaii, the Traveller came as a large and moving Torb! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the Meketrex Supplicants they chose a new form for him–that of a Giant Sloar! Many Shubs and Zulls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Sloar that day, I can tell you.

  4. Little known fact: That’s what the original sod at Heinz Field actually looked like.

  5. Well done, Reason.com. That’s way better than those ridiculous remy videos. Who did it?

    1. You don’t like Remy videos. Ergo, Remy is not a racist. QED.

  6. My radical leftist coworker just breathlessly reported to me that Trump has removed the LGBT rights, civil rights, & climate change pages of the White House website.

    According to her, this means that it is now legal to hunt and kill gays and minorities, and open season on endless pollution.

    1. I’ve got my chainsaw, noose, gay-bashing 2×4, gas-powered pump (only uses leaded gasoline), and drum with a skull and crossbones sticker w/ undetermined liquid sloshing around inside, all in the bed of my diesel F-350. I can hardly decide what to do first. For the first time in 8 years I have a voice finally!!!

    2. You guys have no idea what it’s like to sit next to 1) someone who is not just a democrat or a liberal, but an actual, out loud and proud anti-capitalist revolutionary who believes with all her heart in every progressive shibboleth and wants you to know about it, and 2) believes that if you disagree with her on any point you are the incarnation of evil and she will refuse to work with you.

      Of course, the company doesn’t care. She and I are on a team. And as long as I continue to bust my ass so that we meet our goals, that’s all they give a damn about.

      1. I’m going to go out on a huge limb and guess she’s also completely humourless. Right?

        1. God damn, I can think of so many great innocent-seeming ways to fuck with a person like that. Is it worth the effort? Cause it sounds like she’s one of those moochers that the only author in the world I ever read before Ayn Rand made reference to.

          1. No, because if she doesn’t contribute do to throwing a snit, it’s my team’s failure. She stopped talking to me once for two weeks and for the first and only time, our manager intervened. Of course she wasn’t written up or anything, just told to play nice.

            I’ve begged my boss to run the reports showing my work output vs. hers (I run them every day, and I know what he’ll find). But he refuses to do it, saying that they don’t want to encourage selfish one-upmanship, and we’re a team and if I’m really a competent worker I’ll learn to work with her because we can’t always chose who we work with.

            So it ultimately becomes *me* who’s the bad worker! The mind boggles.

            1. Some people just want to watch the team burn.

              they don’t want to encourage selfish one-upmanship

              You know the answer, but your pride and work ethic prevents it.

            2. Feckless and spineless management rewarding bad behaviour. I am truly sorry.

            3. Your life seems like a Dilbert cartoon. I’d just run the reports and show it to your manager’s manager to let him know that your manager is a punk and should be fed to sharks. If you get fired, they’ll be doing you a favor. Threaten to sue for sexual discrimination because of the snowflake.

            4. But he refuses to do it, saying that they don’t want to encourage selfish one-upmanship

              So you not only are forced to team with a Marxist, but you work for a bunch of fucking socialists. Maybe it’s time to open up the old job search?

      2. Most of us went to college, I think we can sympathize.

      3. I know what’s like to work with a flake. She was one of the reasons why I left my job in stock brokering and started a business. I didn’t care what it was, as long as I didn’t have to put up with psychos. I control who comes in now.

        All is good and peaceful.

        1. I almost bought a c-store once a few years ago, until I spent a month with the current owner and saw his cot in the back and his red-rimmed eyes from constant 14 hr days, 7 days a week. He told me he hadn’t taken a day off in six years.

          I decided owning a business wasn’t for me.

          1. Yeh there’s some of that. Depends the business. Mine is in service so it’s not like that. BUT it’s a 24-hour thing. You never really have peace running a business; the calls, emails, blah, blah. It’s hard to find free time but there’s the autonomy. And man do I value autonomy. No price on that.

            1. I hear you. I thought about it – I don’t mind the occasional middle-of-the-night emergency, but I would need to find a business that operates during, you know, business hours. So the c-store was probably a bad fit. I do admire folks like you that make it work.

              1. Become an independent contractor and work for large enterprises. Really easy to whore yourself out to corporations at a very high hourly rate and do very little real work. And since you’re an operational expense and not an employee, they’ll rarely have you work overtime.

                Total win-win.

              2. You also have to be able to handle the psychology behind carrying debt, dealing with banks, the government and of course employees. NOT EASY. At all.

                As for the money, yeh, but I ain’t rolling in it – I would need to expand and that would be my gravy. But if my sister is not on board, I can’t do it.

                1. You touch on something interesting, re: carrying debt.

                  I’m terrified of it. My house is worth twice what I owe on it, and that is literally the only debt to my name. I don’t know how you guys manage it – I would be up all night sweating bullets.

      4. an actual, out loud and proud anti-capitalist revolutionary

        So, she’s not selling her labor for filthy lucre? Good for her.

      5. I lived in a college town for about 8 years so I can empathize

      6. Does she work for a profit company? Lol i hope

    3. If you ain’t signaling, then you killing

    4. TELL HER IT’S ABOUT TIME!

    5. Has anybody seen Tonio or jesse?

      1. I heard they’re trying to capitalize on all the despondent rainbow warriors in DC. Ease their suffering, if you know what I mean.

      2. Can’t talk now. Pence strapped TENS units on our genitals and is showing us pictures of nude men and women and zapping us whenever the men come up. He’s also stroking himself very slowly and laughing.

        I think we might be filming a porn video for Brutal Tops, but I can’t see a camera.

        1. We can but hope someone is recording this.

        2. That made me laugh out loud – almost makes up for clicking on your link to super-hardcore gay pr0n yesterday.

    6. You realize your co-worker is an idiot who should probably have to wear one of those bike helmets when she goes outside, and should be travelling to and from work in a short bus, certainly not driving herself.

    7. Look, the rights of 2% of the population who as a group do better than average must always be the top priority of any administration. Didn’t you know that?

    8. Are you guys social signaling again. I’m sorry, Gorija, about your difficult co-worker. Not everybody is the same. There’s plenty of right-wing assholes who work too. I get along with my [admittedly few] Trump fans just fine. Can you stop talking about your shitty co-worker and using it as a justification for how Trump is awesome. That’s both here-nor-there and dumb. Thanks, american socialist.

      1. Which one of you am I not supposed to like?

        1. I’m confused how anything I said was supposed to be a justification of Trump being awesome, which is not an opinion I hold.

          1. That’s how you can tell it’s the real amsoc. It has roughly the same sense as a moron.

            Am + S + O + C + Cl = I + Q???

            1. So the real amsoc is the one with Norman Thomas and the good amsoc is the one with DU linked?

              This is why I hate spoof handles. Trying to figure out if someone slipped a 0 in for a capital O or whether someone is using a secret capital i instead of a lower case l is just a drag.

              No offense spoof amsoc, you seem like an all right enough guy.

              1. nm, I realized that’s backward. Sigh. fascr sorted it for me.

      2. No thank you, I’m not interested in visiting links to your posts at Radix.

      3. This would be an example of me trolling like i mentioned in the links

    9. I believe you need a federal migratory LGBT sticker for your state-issued hunting license before you can legally harvest a gay or minority. State bag limits also apply.

  7. This is funny because I always considered Bane’s soliloquy about poisoning people with hope while he plunders Gotham to be an indictment of the outgoing former administration.

    1. I think it’s kinda funny that trump the entirety of the overlap is so trite as to be entirely coincidental.

      He could totally be quoting “Give It Back To You” by The Record Company.

    2. Outgoing, incoming, does it make a difference? Hope and change people, hope and change.

  8. So…you’re gonna be doing “Hitler reacts to Trump inauguration” next?

    1. It appears that someone made a “Hillary reacts….” version in November.

      1. LOL…that was well done.

  9. Trump is a breath of fresh air since the dolts that followed Reagan.

    Just dump all the asinine trade shit and start kicking douchebags outta DC Donny!

  10. I was thinking today about who’s worse: Democrats or Republicans. And after some thought, here’s my conclusion:

    Worst: Urban Republicans – A small but truly awful group of people. They love big government in every way possible. They are the beneficiaries of stop and frisk assaults on minorities, as well as crony capitalism. They are wealthy and powerful, and never suffer from the horrible policies that they implement. Donald Trump, Rudy G, Chris Christie, are perfect examples of this scum.

    Second Worst: Urban Democrats – While the detestable and truly evil SJWs reside here, the Democratic Party is a default position for most urban dwellers. They accept big government solutions and in some ways I can understand why…but I cannot abide them advocating for their statist positions at the federal level.

    Third Worst: Rural Republicans – Like the Urban Democrats, this now is a default position for most rural dwellers. The mouth breathing SOCONS are strong in this area. But…most Rural Republicans have a live and let live attitude and as long as noone steps over the line, they are perfectly nice people.

    Fourth Worst: Rural Democrats – A small and dying group…Like their rural Republican neighbors, they tend to like limited government, but without the cultural hangups.

    Way overgeneralized…I know, but I think I’m on to something here.

    1. What policies do urban republicans implement? Are you talking about at the local level or federal? I can see federal but no local since that is run overwhelming by team blue

  11. This video was missing a climax.

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