Vanessa Hudgens Guilty of Cultural Appropriation, Jackie Blames PTSD: P.M. Links

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  • Vanessa
    AXELLE WOUSSEN/Bauergriffin/Newscom

    Actress Vanessa Hudgens donned some African braids and woah that's problematic. Has she even heard of cultural appropriation?

  • UVA / Rolling Stone trial deposition tapes: Jackie sticks by her story, but claims PTSD has made her memory hazy. So now she's lying about that, too.
  • Shocker: Donald Trump is singularly obsessed with being a celebrity, going on TV, and winning at things.
  • Trump claims he isn't interested in launching Trump TV.
  • Five ways the election could go.
  • You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot. I suggest we all flood the college with the following suggestion: "Mascot McMascotFace."

NEXT: Justin Timberlake Ballot Selfie Leads to Silly Hand-Wringing Over Laws

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  1. Actress Vanessa Hudgens donned some African braids and woah that’s problematic.

    So tacky.

      1. /slaps DEG.

        Hello.

          1. No one slaps me anymore.

            1. SLAP!

              /me

            2. Forehand and backhand slap.

              1. That’s not how you play Fronthand-Backhand.

                1. Ugh.

        1. What did five fingers say to the face….. ( have to do it in Rick James via Dave Chappelle voice)

      2. DEG,
        Get you some dragonglass son, the white walkers will be at your door now.

        1. Very polite ones right?

    1. Hello.

    2. The way her lipstick only covers a small part of her mouth is creepy.
      It makes her look like the Joker.

    3. Yeah, braids are SO African, let me tell you.

      1. Pippi Longstocking appropriated them on a trip to Nairobi.

        1. I’m offended that Michelle Obama styles her hair in some way other than an unkempt afro.

          1. I believe the word for which you are looking is “nappy.”

    4. black girls straightening their hair…..

      1. You can’t appropriate white culture because white people don’t have culture.

        1. You have plenty of culture.

          What you lack is flavor.

          You have to up your game from just paprika.

          1. Um…Hickory, Mesquite, and Applewood are flavors, right?

          2. Whenever I see stuff like this, I am wont to point out that it was Europeans that introduced chili peppers to the world. And that paprika itself is a product of those self same chilis.

    5. My wife early voted today and just gave me some devastating news.

      Apparently we changed congressional districts in the latest redistricting without me paying attention.

      I’m now in Debbie Wasserman-Schultz’s congressional district.

      1. Condolences. And spiced rum.

      2. She has some favors to pull in, go get you a government contract asap.

      3. So you can finally vote against her.

        But you might want to keep her around for insect control.

    6. African Braids?

      When, exactly, did Africans discover braiding hair?

      How does a race whose hair grows tightly curled upon it’s head come up with taking long lengths of straight hair and forming them into ropes?

      Dreads I can understand. Filth plus growth can give someone dreadlocks, but braids?

      I suspect that particular ‘appropriation’ goes the other way–and that it did so in antiquity

  2. Five ways the election could go.

    “Five ways!? But there’s only two candidates!” – typical American voter

    1. Hillary wins, takes Senate.

      Hillary wins, takes House.

      Hillary wins, takes Congress.

      Hillary wins, fails to gain any hold on Congress.

      Hillary wins, shock too much and Kaine becomes president.

      1. Woo Number 5! Come on Number 5!

        1. That is a golden link there sir. Bravo.

      2. Lachowsky goes to work and doesn’t stop by polling place on the way home.

        Lachowsky goes to work and stops by the polling place on the way home but sees there is a half dozen people in lone and decides it not worth his time.

        Lachowsky doesn’t go to work and doesn’t leave the leave house to go to the polling place.

        Lachowsky gets drunk all day and goes to bed early without visiting the polling place.

        Lachowsky gets drunk all day and near the close of the polls decides that in order to get his middle finger up high enough he’s gonna vote for the Donald because FYTW, but gets arrested for dwi and doesn’t make it to the polls.

        1. I like this Lachowsky fella.

      3. Option 6: Hillary wins, American public, wary of fixed elections, refuses to accept results, overthrows Hillary before inauguration. Things rapidly escalate and democrats are hunted like game animals.

        *Sigh*………..one can always dream.

        1. THIS I could get behind.

    2. Five ways the election could go.

      1. Just slip out the back, Jack.
      2. Make a new plan, Stan.
      3. No need to be coy, Roy, just get yourself free.
      4. Just hop on the bus, Gus.
      5. Just drop off the key, Lee.

      1. Lyrics from Fifty Ways to Leave Your Country (Because Your Candidate Didn’t Win)?

        1. Jinx.

      2. 50 States to leave the Union?

      3. unfortunately, we know the sixth won’t happen:

        6. Just get yourself free.

      4. 1. Just slip out the back, Jack.
        2. Make a new plan, Stan.
        3. No need to be coy, Roy, just listen to me
        4. Just hop on the bus, Gus. You don’t need to discuss much
        5. Just drop off the key, Lee. and get yourself free

        Sorry, had to fix that. Bad enough it started going through my head–going through my head chopped up was hitting the crazy buttons.

  3. Shocker: Donald Trump Obama is singularly obsessed with being a celebrity, going on TV, and winning at things.

    1. ^This. Sad thing his fan club wants him to do all of that.

    2. Update on Obamajam October 2016 election edition:

      Obama was late to the airport, but they shut down arrivals anyway. LAX airspace was crammed with go-arounds while Obama took his sweet time. For the record, each go around costs several thousand dollars in fuel, and it’s somewhat dangerous when it gets crowded enough.

      It’s fucking stealing, plain and simple.

      1. Obamajam

        Stop giving leftist assholes any ideas about a new music festival.

      2. Why can’t he fly to air force bases?

        1. He flew in from Miramar, but only because San Diego is iffy for 747s.

          LAX is closest to the billionaire donors, so he flew there. Fuck the little people.

        2. “Why can’t he fly to air force bases?”

          Not welcome!

      3. And the extra fuel usage from the go-arounds kills Mother Gaia. Why does he want of us to die?

        1. Fuel rations for the proles will have to be reduced to make up for this.

        2. Don’t forget the Obama’s take his and hers 747s to go on vacation. As instapundit puts it, I’ll believe it’s a crisis when the people who keep telling me it’s a crisis start acting like it’s a crisis.

      4. Go arounds? That’s aborting the actual landing by applying power to climb back up. Maybe in a holding pattern or flow control by holding departures at the originating airports and round about routings into LAX?

        1. Here’s a nice go around video particularly starting at about the 0:36 mark. I don’t see ATC allowing a final approach and then calling for a go around.

        2. Yes, Go Arounds. These were arrivals that were sequenced on short final to 24R, and they had to climb out and rejoin the final to 25L at the South Complex.

          They kept lining up arrivals at the North Complex and sending them around because they had no idea when Air Force One was leaving.

          It was too late to hold departures from originating airports. A few of these flights were A380s from overseas, which all arrive in a cluster right after lunchtime.

          1. Holy fuck. Goddam. That is bullshit.

      5. Those concerns are all for the little people.

  4. Shoppers Drug Mart formally applies to distribute medical marijuana

    Canada’s largest pharmacy chain has formally applied to be a distributor of medical marijuana.

    “We have applied to be a licensed producer strictly for the purposes of distributing medical marijuana,” Shoppers Drug Mart spokeswoman Tammy Smitham told CBC News in an email Tuesday.

    “We have no intention of producing medical marijuana, but we do want the ability to dispense medical marijuana to our patients in conjunction with counselling from a pharmacist.”

    1. Counseling from a pharmacist = Cheetos are in aisle six.

  5. Jackie sticks by her story, but claims PTSD has made her memory hazy.

    The traumatic stress of that dude not liking her.

    1. He as so disinterested in her that he ceased to exist.

      1. No, the real one the fake one was supposed to make jealous.

  6. 5 out of 6 links are Robbyhorses.

    1. I expected all 5 to get full posts. But the night is young.

    2. He’s trolling the commenters.

      1. If by “trolling” you mean “petulant hissy-fit,” then sure.

        1. Can anything done ‘neath that glorious coif really be described as “petulant,” though?

          I’m deferring to your linguistic cunning. I really don’t know the answer.

        2. Heroic Mulatto|10.25.16 @ 4:35PM|#

          If by “trolling” you mean “petulant hissy-fit,” then sure.

          I read that as “Hepulant Pussy-fit”

          1. I’ll take one, whatever it is.

        3. The commenters do have petulant hissy fits.

          1. YOU LEAVE ROBBY ALONE! All his links are deeply thunk. And like duh! have you seen his fucking hair….

      2. (I should add that I favor this trolling.)

    3. “Robbyhorses” for the mothergrabbing win.

      He is the Reason writer we all love to hate.

      1. Robby is Sheldon Richman?

        1. No, that was just hate-hate. Robby is just too cute to be really hated. And he knows that.

      2. “Robbyhorses” for the mothergrabbing win.

        All kudos to Dr. Groovus.

      3. I don’t hate Robby, I think of him more as like when your kid comes up to you and shown you what they’ve drawn, and it’s bloody terrible. But you pat him on the head and put it up on fridge anyway. Then you make fun of your kid’s shitty drawing with your friends.

        1. I belittle the kid straight to their face.

          They gotta learn early and quick life is terrible and filled with assholes.

        2. But with Robby, it would be the kid drawing something terrible on purpose, making you think that is the best he can do just to fuck with you.

          1. And then he steals your girlfriend.

            Wait, what were we talking about?

        3. I’m still not sure whether Robby is the World’s Greatest Troll, or if God, in his infinite perversity, decided to take a punching bag, put legs and hair on it, and send if marching off on the planet to seek it’s fortune….

    4. Robbo is MotherJones material.

      1. My Lord, has his stock fallen that hard since out-smarting Anna Merlan?

        1. I thought that was his dream job.

    5. We need a country-western “Ballad of Soave” where the posse mounts their Robbyhorses and ride off to catch up to the “bad guys”, and then concoct reasons that they’re not really “bad guys” but only sorta-bad guys, have coffee with them, and part ways having not really accomplished anything.

      1. That would be one boring ballad.

        1. Sure it would be, Rufus. Sure. [Surreptitiously shreds draft of “The Ballad of Robby Soave”]

          1. I was amused to learn that “Soave” is the namesake of a particular rectal surgery technique.

  7. A Clickbait Site’s Trackers Cost the USA $4M in Data Monthly, Entrepreneur Says

    […]Balkan wrote a script to scan the top one million Alexa-ranked sites for trackers. He identified what he calls the worst site on the internet: Lifebuzz. For those that haven’t visited, it’s just a wall of clickbait. Balkan found 172 web trackers on this one site. “If you block this, you save about 2.5 megabytes every time you load this site,” he said.

    Balkan calculated the real world cost of these trackers from Lifebuzz’s own reported statistics, some of which you can see in its its media kit (though its numbers could be exaggerated). “So using this, we were able to calculate that Lifebuzz, this one site, costs American mobile phone users $4 million a month, in data charges,” he says. “Just to load the trackers.”[…]

    To create a world in which people’s data isn’t farmed and our privacy isn’t perpetually violated, he argues that the law needs to recognize that our selves extend into digital space.[…]

    Further, Balkan argues that governments should subsidize entrepreneurs building decentralized services, using free and open technology, with zero knowledge of their users, so that these entrepreneurs won’t be beholden to venture capital investors to pay the rent while they build services.

    1. NO CONTRACTUAL OBLIGATIONS! Just steal the money for us, dammit!

    2. Wouldn’t it be easier to just not visit the site?

      1. That’s absurd. One can only stay away from “Top 50 Most Dangerous Dog Breeds”-type links for so long.

          1. Chihuahua?

        1. …don’t…click…picture of…impossibly sexy…weather girls…ahhhh! I can’t resist anymore!

    3. Is there anyone that DOESN’T use Ghostery?

      Admittedly, I have no idea if there is any such thing for mobile browsers.

    4. Of course, the State will never follow such laws.

  8. Donald Trump is singularly obsessed with being a celebrity, going on TV, and winning at things.

    How that doesn’t resonate with Millennials is beyond me.

    1. Not enough virtue-signaling while doing so

  9. I suggest we all flood the college with the following suggestion: “Mascot McMascotFace.”

    Christ does that just get funnier and funnier every time.

    1. Facebookistic Faceist Swine!

    2. I would have been more impressed if Robby had given it the Mike M. treatment.

      1. The Amherst Block Insane Yomommas?

    3. The Amherst Parasites.

    4. The Amherst Appropriators.

  10. Everyone’s upset with Amy Schumer’s ‘Formation’ parody ? and for good reason

    Amy Schumer has done the unthinkable: She released a parody video of Beyonc?’s “Formation” on her YouTube account (and Tidal!) featuring Goldie Hawn and a host of other famous faces. The video, which showcases Amy’s lack of twerking skills, is a convoluted mess full of stuffed animals, goats and dirt. And it definitely wasn’t well-received.

    The hashtag #AmySchumerGottaGoParty was started by Feminista Jones, who, like a lot of other black feminists, isn’t a fan of Schumer’s antics. To start, “Formation” is a pro-black anthem with lyrics like: “My daddy Alabama, momma Louisiana, you mix the negro with that creole make a Texas bama.” It’s where Beyonc? asserts and celebrates her blackness. And with this parody, Schumer is essentially mocking a song that has become a pro-black anthem. I mean, “I like my baby hair with baby hair and afros, I like my nose with Jackson Five nostrils,” says it all.[…]

    Black Twitter didn’t hold back any punches. It’s hard to imagine what Amy Schumer was thinking messing with anything Queen Bey-related. But until Amy actually makes the attempt to understand why people are upset by her parody (and her other comments), the beef between her and Black Twitter will never end.

    1. Parody is fun and all, but you can’t parody Important Works. smh, Schooms.

      Wonder if these people did/would have freaked out about “Amish Paradise.”

    2. Ha ha ha ha ha haha *gasps* ha ha ha. Ha.

    3. Hard to pick a side here

      1. 2003 Beyonce?

      2. A pox on both their houses.

      3. I am going with Schummer. Schummer is just a not very funny comedian. Beyonce is one of the most singular annoying celebrities on earth.

        1. Meh. Schumer can be funny. I think she makes more money in this persona. I didn’t give her money before and I don’t give her money now. Its all the same to me.

        2. I dunno. Once she became a beloved darling of the left, she became intolerably preachy and sanctimonious.

          1. It appears from the link she is not such a darling anymore. Oh well, the knock at the door always comes.

        3. Beyonce is one of the most singular annoying celebrities on earth.

          Not just annoying, but completely overrated and has been for years. She’s basically a glorified Vegas go-go dancer with a big ass and a slick marketing team that are euphemistically called “writers”. The entertainment industry’s collective hard-on for her is the greatest example of mass media’s obsession with style over substance.

          1. The Beyhive is going to take you down.

            1. An appropriate moniker for people who act like a bunch of single-minded drones.

    4. Beyonce has become some kind of goddess of racial tolerance to stupid white progressives. It doesn’t matter than she has little talent and is one of the most forgettable performers of the last 20 years. Praising Beyonce is something all stupid white people must do to atone for their sin of being white.

      1. Easily over praised.

        She’s no Alanis! /high five for all the Canadians.

        1. Honestly, she is not. Wow is that a backhanded compliment.

      2. meh. She an adequate professional singer, but she’s far from a great (or even good) artist.

        1. SHE’S an adequate singer.

          *sigh* How’s that edit button coming along? Us people with big fat hands could really use it.

          1. Too late, black twitter has noted your Ebonics parody.

      3. I once called Jay Z a talentless hack in front of a bunch of earnest, bearded hipsters. There weren’t enough defibrillators in the county to overcome the unintentional carnage.

        1. And what do you want to bet that none of those morons could pick Jay Z out of a lineup or even hum one of his songs. Praising hip hop and Jay Z is just what stupid white people do.

          1. I liked the Black Album. Jay-Z always has a kind of dumb look on his face, so I could pick him out easily.

        2. People like him? Jesus.

          I don’t like rap, but Tupac and NWA were a lot better.

          If people really want to celebrate black culture, there’s Etta James and Ben E King. Alicia keys isn’t a bad singer even if say. Beyonc? though? This is like getting offended on behalf of Italians that someone insulted Olive Garden.

      4. Praising Beyonce is something all stupid white people must do to atone for their sin of being white.

        I read a comment somewhere about how SJW progressivism has become America’s religion now that actual religious belief has largely been nerfed in the last 20-30 years, with virtue-signaling acting as an expression of devotion the way Catholics recite a rosary. Unironically liking terrible black entertainers for fear of being cast as a repugnant bigot has become part of the SJW commandments.

      5. I can’t think of a single Beyonce song. Not without an internet search.

    5. “My daddy Alabama, momma Louisiana, you mix the negro with that creole make a Texas bama.” It’s where Beyonc? asserts and celebrates her blackness.

      No, it celebrates her multi-racial identity, you ‘one drop’ moron.

      1. What about when she says when he fuck me good I take his ass to Red Lobster?

        1. She’s celebrating the return of Endless Shrimp.

          1. They biscuits b good?

            1. The Fam ain’t eating’ chedda Biscuits!
              /Riley

          2. +1 basket of cheddar bay biscuits

          3. Crabfest or gtfo

          4. Red Lobster is where you go if you want to taste what sea food should not taste like.

        2. Are we talkin’ during Crabfest or just any ol’ time of year?

          1. With Beyonc? all year is crabfest.

        3. That’s a pretty good deal, all things considering. Biggest cost is tolerating Beyonce. But cheesy biscuits…

      2. In fairness, I think in this case, one drop makes you better than white in the writer’s eyes. Me, I think this sort of thing is more complex, but I also don’t bother someone citing a song lyric as a proof with logic or reason.

      3. Sometimes I don’t understand – and don’t want to understand – American humor and its vernacular.

        1. It embarasses me as well.

        2. I’ve never been able to understand a lot of the race thing either, being a product of a mostly super-white country. I mean, I get the slavery, Jim Crow, Malcolm X, Martin Luther King Jr. stuff, but I’ve never been able to look at an extremely dysfunctional black community and go “yep, that’s all whitey’s fault”. Probably has to do with growing up around a lot of poor whites and recognizing where their problems come from.

          That’s why when I hear about BLM protesters in Toronto I’m really confused.

          1. What’s even stranger is the white proponents of the Whitey is keepin them down worldview come from places where there’s hardly any blacks.

            So we get to witness southern whites who are friends with blacks and work around them get lectured about how they hate blacks from people who only see them from watching Beyonc? videos.

          2. Having lived around both black people and more than my share of stupid white people, here is what is going on. For Prog whites racism has nothing to do with blacks. Black people are just props. Racism is really about Prog whites having a reason to feel morally superior to non prog whites. So they look at ghettos and say “it is all whitey’s fault” because doing so allows them to feel superior to non prog whites, by virtue of it of course being “other whites” who are responsible and if nothing else by realizing how whites are responsible where non whites are not.

            Progs don’t’ talk about black responsibility because doing that doesn’t allow them to feel morally superior to nonprog whites. And doing that is the entire point for them. They are some of the most self centered people on earth.

    6. “Black Twitter”? We got separate Twitters now?

      1. Those people want it like that. Yes, I mean these people.

      2. Damn, you beat me to that comment.

      3. I think it’s called Blatter.

    7. It’s where Beyonc? asserts and celebrates her blackness.

      Black nationalism= respectable

    8. The beef between her and Black Twitter will never end??? HOLY SHIT, HOW WILL SHE EVER SURVIVE THIS MAELSTORM?

      Oh, and someone seriously calls themselves Feminista Jones? baaahahahahahaha

      1. A spiritual heir to Basketball Jones?

        TRIGGER WARNING: EVERYTHING

        1. Maybe she’s related to Osmosis Jones?

          1. I hate myself for recognizing that reference. Bill Murray will do anything for buck.

      2. It’s derived from the Swahili word Fem’ista. It roughly translates as ‘one who’s breakfast gets urinated upon every morning’.

    9. Man, know your audience. Did you really think the same people you entertain with the feminist comedian shtick wouldn’t go ballistic over this??

    10. Schumer is essentially mocking a song that has become a pro-black anthem. I mean, “I like my baby hair with baby hair and afros, I like my nose with Jackson Five nostrils,” says it all.

      a pro-black anthem

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0OFF3q4Pxk

      1. Totally culturally appropriated from Lead Belly.

    11. I would like to point out that there’s nothing wrong with mocking a pro-black song since it’s as retarded as a pro-white song. Left on left violence warms my heart though.

    12. The fuck is Black Twitter?

  11. Robby, perhaps there’s some mistake, you linked to Buzzfeed.

  12. Shocker: Donald Trump is singularly obsessed with being a celebrity, going on TV, and winning at things.

    Because if it is about Trump and the New York Times says it, it must be true.

    1. Man if you think Trump’s obsessions are a problem, wait ’til you see what Clint-On is obsessed with!

    2. If I wasn’t such a lazy man, I’d go through the AM and PM links to count Trump vs. Hillary links. I’ll bet the ratio is even more skewed than the Reason stories.

      And if I were on the staff here, I’d be fucking embarrassed about the lopsided coverage.

      1. Why make the effort when you know what the answer is going to be?

      2. And if I were on the staff here, I’d be fucking embarrassed about the lopsided coverage.

        I’d be less embarassed about the lopsided coverage, and more about the amazing amount of unprofessionalism Reason writers think they can get away with when writing about Trump. The fact that they endlessly use the ‘Yelling Trump’ and ‘Baby Trump’ images for their stories does not reflect well on their maturity. I mean, sure, if they used the freaky demon Clinton pictures it’d at least be consistently juvenile, but really using these images at all just further pushes them from ‘serious news’ to ‘clickbait’.

        1. They have proven themselves to be shallow and juvenile. There are few easier assignments than “the Libertarian Case Against Trump”, yet the reason staff has managed to fail at even that simple task.

          1. The oroblem with the libertarian case against Trump is it’s all issues Hillary is worse on. Neither candidate is libertarian after all.

  13. Have election fatigue. Need frivolity.

    Man Dressed As Tree Arrested

    It is an indisputable fact that trees don’t belong in the street. Luckily, we have law enforcement to deal with such situations. Yesterday in Portland, Maine, police successfully arrested a stubborn human tree, who was blocking traffic at a busy intersection.

    The piney perp “went to Congress Square wearing what appeared to be branches from an evergreen tree,” the Portland Press-Herald reports. Police approached him, lifted the needly branches from his face, and told him to stay out of traffic. When he walked into the road, they arrested him for obstructing a public way. Video shows the tree slowly shuffling down the crosswalk, flanked by officers.

    The offending tree man, Asher A. Woodworth, is a local artist. His previous work includes various professional dance performances, as well as stealing the pepper from a local Chili’s sign. He describes himself as an “impulsive” person who “believes in physical labor and the unity of opposites.” Photo and video evidence suggest he made a really convincing tree.

    1. Some sort of appropriation, I’m sure.

      1. Its sexism, too. Everyone knows dryads are female. Unless he was dressed as an Ent.

        1. Search for the Entwives: Rape Culture or Mere Stalking?

          1. http://www.tolkiensociety.org/…..the-rings/

            Why is that pretty much real??

      2. You’re barking up the wrong tree mister!

      3. Some sort of appropriation, I’m sure.

        Horticultural appropriation?

    2. So was he sporting wood?

    3. Woodworth, ha!

  14. NYT diligently concerntrolling Republicans

    It’s true that you have no great options, which is why polls still show many undecided voters. Gary Johnson, initially intriguing, has proved unqualified. You could stay home or write in a vote, but those protests often feel weak.

    The best path is the hardest one. Only an unambiguous rejection of Trump will banish Trumpism for 2020 and beyond. Only a lopsided loss, with millions of Republicans so repelled by him that they vote for someone they never imagined they would, sends the message that bigotry, lying and authoritarianism violate Republican values ? your values.

    I don’t take lightly how hard it is for you to consider a vote for Hillary Clinton. I’m sure that George H.W. Bush, who’s signaled he is voting for her, will do so out of duty, not joy. The same applies to many Republican military figures and conservative newspapers. Any other choice, as the former Reagan aide Ken Adelman says, is at least “a half vote for Trump.”

    The best path is our path. Help us put Hillary in the White House, you insufferable dupes.

    1. lying and authoritarianism violate Republican values ? your values.

      The subtext here that lying authoritarianism doesn’t violate Democratic values?

      1. The subtext is these people have no values when it comes to making sure no one upsets their racket.

        1. I’ve said it many times – you’ll only ever hear of a Republican being a hypocrite. Being a hypocrite means privately violating the principles you publicly espouse and nobody’s yet accused a Democrat of publicly espousing any principles.

          1. That is a good point and explains a lot.

          2. Since they have no princples whatsoever other than the accumulation of power, that’s not surprising. Not that the GOP actually has values, but they at least pretend to.

      2. This from a paper inhabited by valueless hacks without a single god damn principle worth defending.

        And fuck their cess pool of shitty commenters. They read like the pseudo-intellectual student in college who raised their hands with minutes to go in class only to bless us with their vapid jargon-garbo-gibberish.

    2. Trolling? It makes me want to vote Trump.

      1. I have never voted in a presidential election. It’s shit like this that is going to make me drag my ass to poll on the 8th and pull the lever for trump.

    3. This shows just how much the Republicans and Democrats are on the same page. Their well publicized differences are intended to keep the voting public divided and the trend of government unaffected.

    4. “bigotry, lying and authoritarianism violate Republican values ”

      but not Donkey values, so you’ll be right at home with us!!

    5. bigotry, lying and authoritarianism

      Does anybody actually believe that this isn’t happening either way. To the Republican base, at least Trump is a vote against baby murder.

    6. So, they’re trying to argue that to reject Trump’s lying and authoritarianism, Republicans should vote for…. Hillary Clinton?!?!

      Do these people even have an inkling of how fucking absurd they sound? I mean, even for a fucking moment? The woman is the poster child for lying authoritarian shitheels.

    7. This sort of paternalistic condescension won’t convince any Republican who’s still on the fence to cast their vote for Hillary, especially once the reader wades into the pretentious pseudo-intellectual cesspool of their comment section to see how liberals really feel about Republicans in general.

      Neocons like Bill Kristol and internationalist Republicans like Bush are voting for Clinton because they think she’ll maintain the status quo, not because they think she’ll be a good President, or even a better one than Trump, to be blunt.

    8. The next candidate will be someone who wants to punish the left. Trump is a fuck you to the left. If he doesn’t win a bigger fuck you canidste is coming and I doubt that’s good for anyone since fuck you isn’t a good way to legislate.

      However Hillary is so corrupt that the next election will probably be fixed and only her heir apparent will “win”.

    9. It rings hollow when you know that the same person who wrote that will accuse any Republican candidate in 2020 who is to the right of Obama of being an authoritarian bigot no matter what.

  15. Sooo, a while back I said I dreaded PM Zoolander getting to work rather than flying around the world for photo shoots. But man, it’s actually quite entertaining. After his Minister of Foreign Trade complained how nice country like Canada can’t get a trade deal with EU, he’s gone off to talk to Canadian Labour Congress National Young Workers Summit and the results were…Zoolanderian.

    Prime Minister Justin Trudeau faced off with a room of angry protesters today who were venting their frustrations over everything from pipelines to the failed federal payroll system.

    Some of the participants turned their backs on Trudeau in protest during the “armchair discussion” event at the Canadian Labour Congress National Young Workers Summit in Ottawa.

    “Honour your promises!” hollered some in the crowd, as event moderators tried to keep the peace.

    “We don’t have dialogue with liars!”

    “Shame! Shame!”

    Luckily, he was able to respond with eloquence and maturity expected of him:

    “I will tell you, it is a little bit frustrating for me to come in, sit down and look forward to hearing from you and talking with you, and seeing a room full of people who are standing in a way that shows they are not listening to me, that you don’t want to engage,” he said.

    1. A woman, who identified herself as a young worker representative for the Public Service Alliance of Canada and a member of the union’s bargaining team, grilled Trudeau on the failed Phoenix payroll system.

      “When the hell are we going to get paid, and, two, when the hell are we going to get a contract that is a good deal for all of us, not just one generation?” she asked.

      “And why are we sticking with the Conservative mandate? I’m just so confused.

      Zoolander voter, I bet.

      Hassan Yussuff, president of the Canadian Labour Congress, reminded the audience that the labour movement is a “respectful movement.”

      “The reality is, we can only have constructive dialogue to make this country a better one if we hear each other,” he said. “The prime minister came here this morning as our guest. We spent 10 horrible years experiencing the worst government.”

      We all remember when Liberal Youth were rounded up and their right hand chopped off by roving Conservative militas, right? Truly horrible days so let’s count our blessing and not yell at the man just because you don’t understand Liberals campaign from the left and govern in their self-interest.

      1. “When the hell are we going to get paid, and, two, when the hell are we going to get a contract that is a good deal for all of us, not just one generation?” she asked.

        Oh, ouch… she didn’t just discover how a Union works, did she?

        1. ^ super This. lol

      2. Right now it’s the twin-bill of stupidity. Stupid Canadians ruled by stupid Canadians.

        The retard level has been cranked up to 11.

        What is it with this ‘but we’re so nice, why are mean?’ shtick the Liberals are using? STOP IT. It’s nauseating.

      3. Hey Pan, you’re not being fair. It’s been ten years. Ten years. You can’t expect these people to remember how Chretien or Martin operated (speaking of which, my god, I never thought I’d miss them).

    2. Canadian Labour Congress National Young Workers Summit

      This event desperately… and I mean desperately needs a new name.

      1. Maybe. Or maybe, it’s a perfect event to invite PM Zoolander to.

        (Maybe if they added “For Young Workers Who Don’t Make Too Much”)

      2. Canadian
        Labour
        Organization for
        Workers
        Network

      3. “Canadian Labour Congress National Young Workers Summit

        This event desperately… and I mean desperately needs a new name.”

        Maple Suckers Sheep Shearing?

    3. The biggest impression Trudeau made on me was seeing him elbow a woman in the face and drag some PM back to his seat by the arm like a child because the guy didn’t vote like he wanted him to. For the life of me, I can’t understand why the guy didn’t punch Zoolander in the face. Criminal penalties or not, it would have been well worth it and probably a solid case of self-defense as well.

    4. “I will tell you, it is a little bit frustrating for me to come in, sit down and look forward to hearing from you and talking with you, and seeing a room full of people who are standing in a way that shows they are not listening to me, that you don’t want to engage,” he said.

      A passive-aggressive comment for a passive-aggressive constituency.

  16. The Amherst Microaggressions
    The Amherst Culturally Sensitive, Nongendered Amorphous Blob
    The Amherst Harambes

    1. I am confused, don’t they need to change the name of the college first?

      1. It was named after the town, which was named after Jeffery, Lord Amherst. Best known as an Indian fighter, and he fought dirty. Really dirty.

        You will Do well to try to Innoculate the Indians by means of Blankets, as well as to try Every other method that can serve to Extirpate this Execrable Race. I should be very glad your Scheme for Hunting them Down by Dogs could take Effect, but England is at too great a Distance to think of that at present.

        The innoculation of the Indians by means of blankets did not refer to a flu vaccine.

  17. Family sues NC school district because their son was killed while walking to school

    The parents of 14-year-old Steven Canipe Jr are suing the Gaston County School District for wrongful death, claiming his one-mile walk to school was too dangerous, reports the Charlotte Observer’s news partner, WBTV.

    Canipe was walking on New Hope Road to Cramerton Middle School in October 2014 when a car traveling 45 mph hit and killed him.

    The road there is without sidewalks and there is no crosswalk. The lawsuit claims the mother requested a school bus pick up her son, but the school district denied the request because the Canipes lived less than a mile from the school.

    Hmm… why not sue the driver of the car that kill your son?

    Oh, from a story linked in the CDT article:

    A 14-year-old died after witnesses said he darted in front of a vehicle in Gaston County on Friday morning, according to the N.C. Highway Patrol.

    Your 14 year old thought darting in front of a car, assuming the witnesses are correct, was a good idea. I don’t think the school district is the problem here.

    1. I am with the family on that one. If there was no safe way to walk to school, and a busy street with no sidewalk is not a safe way, then the school should have sent a bus. There are three elements to negligence, a duty, a breach of that duty, and foreseeable harm resulting from that breach. Here the school had a duty to provide a safe way for the kid to get to school. The breached that duty when refused to send a bus and expected him to walk on a busy street with no sidewalk to get there. That breach resulting in the foreseeable harm of him being hit by a car. Was the driver who hit him negligent as well? Probably. But that fact doesn’t make the school any less negligent for expecting him to walk on a busy street where there was no sidewalk to school. It is pretty foreseeable that the kid could get hit doing that.

      Fuck the school. That is just a horrible story.

      1. The school is in the sidewalk and road building business?

        1. No. The school is in the transporting children to school business. They have a duty to ensure every kid gets to school safely. They do that by sending out buses. In cases where the kids are close to the school, they tell the kids to walk. And that is fine in most cases. In this case, there was no safe way for the kid to walk. And the parents told the school that. Remember, the kid is required by law to go to school. So he can’t just not go. So thanks to the school refusing to send a bus, he had to walk to school in spite of there being no safe way to do so. And foreseeably, it resulting in his death.

          Now do you see what I mean?

          1. The school is in the forcing kids to got to it business.

            1. The school is in the forcing kids to got to it business.

              I am not sure if you meant that literally but that is exactly what they are doing.

            2. That probably reinforces John’s case actually.

              One issue here appears to be the literal, no exceptions application of an arbitrary rule: that you have to live more than a mile away to get a bus. No exceptions. If it’s true there were no sidewalks, then this is one of those cases where an official is supposed to, like, make a decision. Remind me again what they get paid for?

          2. That might be an east coast thing.

            I get my kids to school. They’re my responsibility until they step onto campus.

            No buses. Expect for the short buses, but that’s none of my business.

          3. Keep in mind that this “kid” was 14. By 14, I was pretty much done growing, and probably at the peak of my emotional maturity.

            1. 14 is when you start being treated like an adult whenever it is convenient for all the real adults, and treated like a child whenever it is convenient for those same people. “Oh, I have to pay income taxes, pay full fare to ride the bus, etc but I’m also required to be home by 10PM and attend your indoctrination centers? What a deal!” This country treats 14 to 21 year olds like crap. It’s been a couple decades, but I’m still bitter.

            2. Playa: “By 14, I was pretty much done growing, and probably at the peak of my emotional maturity.”

              That explains a lot. Less mature after 14 must be a CA thing.

          4. Perhaps there is more than one road that leads to the school from that child’s house,

            1. Maybe. And if there was an alternative route that he didn’t take, that changes things. I am assuming that was the only practical route.

      2. There are three elements to negligence, a duty, a breach of that duty, and foreseeable harm resulting from that breach

        So the parents are negligent because they didn’t teach their kid how to cross the street assuming he did dart in front of a car as the second article stated.

        1. No. The road didn’t’ have a sidewalk. There was no safe way to walk on it. So there was no safe way for their kid to get to school. Yet, they were required by law to send him. The school has a duty to provide a safe means of transport to school. That duty is not on the parents. It is on the school and is created by the laws that require kids to attend school. You can’t tell parents it is against the law to not send their kids to school and then not provide a safe means of transporting them to school.

          1. The road didn’t’ have a sidewalk. There was no safe way to walk on it

            It can be done safely.

            Walk on the left and face traffic as you walk. Folks do it all across the country when walking on roads without sidewalks. I’ve done it many times myself. No cars have hit me yet, and I expect that trend will continue.

            A quick check of Google maps shows the road in question has a shoulder. So, walk in the shoulder, on the left side, not in traffic, and don’t dart in front of cars.

            1. It can be done safely.

              Walk on the left and face traffic as you walk. Folks do it all across the country when walking on roads without sidewalks. I’ve done it many times myself. No cars have hit me yet, and I expect that trend will continue.

              Sure it can. But a lot of things can be done safely. That doesn’t however mean that it isn’t a breach of the schools duty to force kids to do them. You can run a chain saw safely. It would however be negligent for a school to let kids run chainsaws without proper supervision.

              What you get at is the heart of the case. Is it unreasonable for a school to expect a child to walk to school on a busy street (and it was likely busy or the guy who hit him wouldn’t have been going 45 mph) that does not have a sidewalk. And my answer to that question is no, if for no other reason than the parents of the kid didn’t think it was safe and told the school as much. If the school wants to overrule what parents think is safe for their kids to do, then they should be on the hook if it turns out parents were right.

              1. Isn’t it the parents responsibility to get the kid to school ?

                The school only offers rides for kids who live more than a mile from school.

                They didn’t force the kid to walk to school on a dangerous road.

                They didn’t force him to walk anywhere.

                His parents forced him to walk down that road.

                1. They didn’t force the kid to walk to school on a dangerous road.

                  Yes they did. If the kid doesn’t show up they will throw him in jail for truancy. They totally forced him to walk. As far as his parents driving him, the parents don’t have a duty to drive him because if they did, there would be no need to provide school bus service to those who can’t walk.

                  1. Yes they did.

                    Hmm. This is just not quite how law works. Does the law actually state in writing that a child has to walk unaccompanied down the side of the street? Or does it actually require that the *parents* need to see that their child regularly attends *a* school, with a variety of options for how and where that can happen being left to the parent. And this particular outcome is an option that the parents chose from among the many available to them, including stuff like giving their kid a ride themselves. I mean does it ever rain there?

                    If I am required by law to attend a court hearing, they don’t send a driver to give me a ride. At least not until after tacking on some new charges and a getting warrant.

            2. I went back to the TV story and it appears that the road does indeed have a shoulder, AND that (at least the part they showed) beyond the shoulder was just grass. Kids can’t walk in grass?

              I tend to agree with John in general that if the law says you have to send your kids to school, then unless you go to a private school, the school should have to ensure that there is a safe way for the kids to get there. But in this particular case, I don’t think the lack of a “sidewalk” made this unsafe.

              Now, it is possible that there isn’t a safe crossing somewhere, and that was why the kid “jumped out in front of traffic”. If that is true, it seems like an argument could be made. But, the lack of sidewalks on this road doesn’t seem to me to rise to unsafe.

              1. The devil is always in the details. I am not sure walking on the shoulder is very safe either. We are talking about kids here. Not all kids are the same and no two kids of the same age can be held to the same standard. Maybe this kid is pretty reckless or no that bright such that he could be trusted to just walk on the shoulder. For whatever reason, the parents didn’t think it was safe. I give them a lot of credibility in that assessment. They know their kid better than anyone. And if the school wanted to disagree, that is fine, but I think they assumed the risk of something going wrong when they did.

              2. Get back to us on the precise width of the shoulder, preferably in millimeters, and we’ll get back to you with a ruling in 4-8 weeks.

      3. Here the school had a duty to provide a safe way for the kid to get to school.

        Disagree. The parents had a duty to get their kid to school safely. Or the city had a duty to put in a painted crosswalk. But no one has a duty to haul your kid around for you.

        1. The parents don’t have that duty because the law requires them to send their kids to school. Further, the law requires the school system to provide bus service for kids to go to school. So the state has assumed the duty to safely transport kids to school. If this were a private school, I would agree with you. But a public school has that duty.

          1. Schools only have an obligation to provide transportation for kids to far to walk. Even that obligation is limited. Rural schools frequently cancel bus service on rural roads after major snowstorms here in Iowa and the kids are still required by law to show up.

            1. . Even that obligation is limited.

              Sure it is. Where it is possible to safely walk to school, the kids are expected to walk. Here it was not possible. And I know it wasn’t possible because the kid’s parents says it wasn’t. The school overruled the parents’ judgement. And that is fine, except that in doing that and saying “no we think it is safe” they then assumed responsibility if something went wrong. If the school doesn’t want that responsibility, they should have sent a bus.

      4. These roads wouldn’t be a problem in Somalia.

    2. Hmm… why not sue the driver of the car that kill your son?

      Because the school district almost surely has deeper pockets. Duh.

      1. Silly me, I forgot that.

      2. Really? A government agency with a million demands on limited resources or an insurance company, that insures somebody who is actually liable? I’d think the insurance company would be the easier target.

    3. The driver of the car can’t just take the money from taxpayers.

    4. The lawsuit is suing in excess of $10,000 for damages.

      So worth it.

  18. Jackie who?

    Onassis?

    Collins?

    Why are we still pretending that this woman is a victim by refusing to use her full name?

    1. WDATPDIM? (Seriously, would adding “Coakley” to the end every time they mention her really change anything?)

      1. Yes it would make her famous for a hoax and follow her around for life. People would then know to avoid the crazy bitch and others would be reminded that being a crazy bitch carries social consequences.

    2. She has to be Jackie… hasn’t she suffered enough?

    3. Blue.

      Lives her life from inside of a room,
      Makes you think that her life is a drag,
      Ooh Jackie, what fun you have had.

      1. I once had a girlfriend named Jackie, and would sing a little song about her to the tune of that song:

        Oooh-ooh, Jackie Blue,
        Every guy that she ever knew.

        She didn’t find it funny.

        1. Well, did she? What’s her number?

    4. ^This

      Her full name should be printed in large block letters across every paper in the nation. She isn’t a victim of sexual assault, so there is no need to hide her identity.

    5. Youthful and virtuous Robby has his youthful and virtuous reasons.

    6. Youthful and virtuous Robby has his youthful and virtuous reasons.

    7. ‘Cause everyone knows when you say just “Jackie” you’re referring to Jackie Coakley. She’s essentially made herself notorious under that mononym, so why not go along with it??

      Like, unless your name is Jackie. Then I could see why you’d be pissed at having your name tarnished and tied to Coakley, but them’s the breaks.

      1. And I’m sure this woman has a few choice words for her….https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack?e_Harry

      2. Because not everyone knows that. When she walks in to get a job they won’t recognize her name and “Jackie” isn’t sufficient to identify her. She’s obviously a lunatic who has no issue slandering people publicly so she should be repaid in kind publicly.

    8. ‘Cause everyone knows when you say just “Jackie” you’re referring to Jackie Coakley. She’s essentially made herself notorious under that mononym, so why not go along with it??

      Like, unless your name is Jackie. Then I could see why you’d be pissed at having your name tarnished and tied to Coakley, but them’s the breaks.

    9. Robinson! 42!

  19. “UVA / Rolling Stone trial deposition tapes: Jackie sticks by her story, but claims PTSD has made her memory hazy. So now she’s lying about that, too.”

    Hey, that hag Clinton gets away with it, why not this POS?

  20. I suggest we all flood the college with the following suggestion: “Mascot McMascotFace Robby the Troll.” With beautiful lifelike hair!

  21. From Robby’s links:

    “Britany Altigieri ? Camp Hill, Pennsylvania
    As a black woman I am 100% not offended by this. Now if she wore this wig, painted her skin black and said this is my Halloween costume…that could’ve been an issue. This isn’t. It’s a damn wig. Chill out.”

    I don’t give a shit you’re not offended because braids are not exclusive to black culture. I have no idea how this how come to be but do these people even read about its history?

    1. No. No they don’t.

      These are people who bitch when a game made in Poland, based on 15th Century Holy Roman Empire and Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth, with more Slavic mythological tradition, does not have black people in it. Only society that ever existed in history was the United States in 2010s, and thus everything everywhere has to match up to its hangups.

      1. This game. Is it Twister?

        1. Witcher 3. Which I heartily recommend.

          1. I wish Viking-Ireland was real so I could live there.

            1. I still don’t trust Toussant. It cannot be as not-shitty as it appears to be.

              But damn if I don’t want to retire to Geralt’s vineyard.

              1. I haven’t gotten around to that DLC yet.

                I just want a spot of land on Skellige and my Viking Girl waifu.

      2. I still haven’t played Witcher 3 yet. I bought it, just haven’t wanted to invest that much time right now. What I did play of it seemed pretty good.

        1. Don’t bother with the PC version unless you have a Falcon Northwest Mach V. They optimized it like a bunch of douchebags.

          1. It’s much better than at release. I have an old i7 (about 4 years, 2.7GHz I think) and an AMD r9 380 w/ 4GB RAM, which is no longer even mid-range, and I get 45-50 fps on high-ish graphics.

            But my god, I saw it on 4K with dual 1080i, on Ultra. Damn they made a pretty game.

          2. Eh, I get what you’re saying, they did make it demanding, but I got through it with a GTX 760 just fine.

    2. I’m glad to have rational voices like Britany’s. The rest of the population just isn’t as attuned to freedom of expression issues as we, here, are.

      [starts preparing poutine made from sweet potato fries with truffle oil infused gravy]

      1. Jesus Christ, To. That sounds…

    3. Well, it’s not just the braids, there’s the kohl on her eyes and the carmine on her lips.

    4. The worst are the ones who say dreadlocks are exclusive to black culture.

      The fuck were the Greeks sculpting then?

    5. Where do these people think those Africans got the beads from in the first place ?

      Slave traders that’s who.

      Plus Stanley and Livingston.

  22. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot.

    The Amherst Drinkin’ Injuns.

    1. Isn’t that the name of the Cleveland baseball team?

  23. Breakfast Cereals In Girl Scout Cookie Flavors Are Now A Thing

    Not made with real girl scouts

    That’s a relief.

    1. Way to ruin my excitement.

  24. Five ways the election could go.

    The Cincinnati chilli of elections?

    1. In that it’s indistinguishable from shit, yes.

      1. Shit served on top of spaghetti.

  25. Peter Thiel apologizes for old remarks about rape

    Warning: auto-play video

    The book included several controversial passages questioning how Stanford handled sexual assault and pushing back on the claims of a particular student who said she had been raped while under the influence of alcohol.

    “But since a multicultural rape charge may indicate nothing more than belated regret, a woman might ‘realize’ that she had been ‘raped’ the next day or even many days later,” according to one passage. “Under these circumstances, it is unclear who should be held responsible. If the alcohol made both of them do it, then why should the woman’s consent be obviated any more than the man’s? Why is all blame placed on the man?”

    On Tuesday, Thiel issued a rare apology for these comments.

    “More than two decades ago, I co-wrote a book with several insensitive, crudely argued statements,” Thiel said in a statement provided to CNNMoney. “As I’ve said before, I wish I’d never written those things. I’m sorry for it. Rape in all forms is a crime. I regret writing passages that have been taken to suggest otherwise.”

    I don’t see what he has to apologize for.

    1. “I don’t see what he has to apologize for”

      He’s an admitted libertarian, that’s what.

      1. He financed suing Gawker out of existence. Yes, to most journalists and every Prog, that is a sin of the highest order. Journalists and Progressive are really that vile.

        1. Indeed. Suing a journalist for defamation is the highest of sins, and all media will rally around the cause.

          1. Steyn’s case is worth pointing out often, especially at Reason, whose writers can use the occasional reminder that there are bigger threats to free speech than campus busybodies.

            1. To be fair, there were two articles who mentioned Steyn within the last month or so, which is a lot more than I expected.

              Oddly enough, they didn’t mention Mann suit, but one talked about his trial before Human Right Commission in Canada. I wonder if they are just not aware of it?

          2. At this point, I’m starting to think/hope that Reason is involved with the suit somehow and is not speaking up about due to the legal implications of doing so.

            1. Only standing they could possibly have is as amicus curiae, which for all I know they are as a part of some association.
              I think Ron said they are waiting on ‘developments’, and the fact that the suit has been parked for four goddamn years, to the point that one of Steyn’s witnesses died of old age, is not a ‘development’.
              My view is that Steyn is Bad on Immigration, so it’s best to ignore him and hope he goes bankrupt. At which point we can have a perfunctory “this is bad in principle” article.

              1. Ah, maybe I’m getting my “punish the nonbelievers” cases mixed up. I thought Steyn had some connection to the Reason Foundation, Cato, or some other libertarian think-tank but perhaps not.

                1. Only connection is that on, say, freedom of speech, policy brutality or national health care there’s little difference between him and Reason.

                  Oh, and he was very vocal about woodchipper incident, talking about it on the Limbaugh show (or so he said, I didn’t listen to it).

    2. Rape in all forms is a crime.

      But…what you wrote back then wasn’t saying that rape is ok. Now you’re making it look like you did say that rape is ok. Damn, you dumbass, you fucked up and gave them exactly what they wanted, an apology. Never apologize to these people. Ever. That’s the beginning of the shit, not the end. That’s how they know they’ve got you.

      1. It amazes me that people who have entire staffs dedicated to managing their public appearance seem to make the same sort of casual mistakes that everyone else does.

    3. So… is there any more or did he do nothing but write something to the effect of “If two drunk people have sex together, why is the man the only rapist??”

      1. What if it is too men? Is the pitcher the rapist and the catcher the victim?

      2. did he do nothing but write something to the effect of “If two drunk people have sex together, why is the man the only rapist??”

        Oh, that little casual dismissal of the horrific crime this man has perpetrated just got your name put on The List.

        He’s a rape apologist, and now you’re a rape apologist apologist. Which is worse because a rapist rapes your body, a rape apologist rapes your mind, but a rape apologist apologist rapes your very identity.

        I once had a guy call me a fatass which makes me a rape survivor and don’t you dare try to take that away from me by claiming I wasn’t actually raped, you filthy disgusting rape denier.

    4. He held women and men to the same standard, which feminists consider a form of misogyny.

  26. “Vanessa Hudgens Is Being Accused Of Cultural Appropriation For Wearing Braids”

    We should take off our clothes and discuss this further.

  27. I would suggest that Trump and Hillary both drop out right now and start their own TV shows, so we can just turn them off and forget about them.

    1. I felt a brief wave of tranquility after reading your suggestion. Thank you for that.
      Now back to the shitshow that can’t be turned off

  28. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot.

    The Amherst White Privilege.

    1. First World Problems Panda

      1. That’s sinophobic

  29. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot.

    Harambe the Title IX Gorilla

    1. Sexual harassment panda?

  30. Not funny, but wtf?

    Dead British man who was found stripped and tied to an airport bench was ‘found with a slice of ham on each buttock and his genitals wedged into a can of TUNA’

    The mysterious death of a British man at Malaga airport took a bizarre turn today after it emerged he was found with a slice of ham on each buttock and his genitals in an open tuna can.
    Steven Allford, 51, was discovered face-down and bound to a bench between the airport’s train station and the terminal building.
    He had a hand bound to one end of the bench and his leg to another with cable ties. His trousers and pants had been pulled down.
    Police are waiting on the results of a post-mortem but suspect he may have been choked to death and possibly sexually assaulted.

    1. The mysterious death of a British man at Malaga airport took a bizarre turn today after it emerged he was found with a slice of ham on each buttock and his genitals in an open tuna can.

      If I know the British, this was self-inflicted.

      1. Freaky conserv-perv sex gone awry?

    2. Such a sad end for the hero of Indiana’s 1987 NCAA champs.

      1. Keith Smart wants a word with you…

        1. Did he even get interviewed after the game? I thought it was Knight and Alford, and he was kind of pushed off the stage.

      2. He’s even the right age (or close enough to make it funny)

    3. Those brits sure know how to party

  31. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot.

    The Whiny Consortium?

  32. I saw something about Amy Schumer doing something racist. Not gonna link.

  33. This is not my favorite picture of Vanessa Hudgens.

    1. I mean seriously. If you’re not going to show the pic with the braids, show the nekkid one that is the only reason I know her name.

      1. How about these cultural appropriations?

        1. She can smokem my peace pipe, if you know what I mean.

      2. Would breast implants be considered part of white culture?

      3. This girl has never done anything for me. Don’t know why.

        1. Because you’re gay? Zing!

          1. Well played.

  34. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot.

    The Safe Spaces?

    1. Sounds like an awful band.

  35. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot.

    The Fightin’ Diva Cups.

    1. Triggered. And also puking.

  36. I see, Amherst’s former mascot was a fan of bacteriological warfare.

    So let’s look up some Amherst alumni ti see of them can be a mascot.

    Hold on…

    1. Ooh, look, Calvin Coolidge!

      And a guy named Henry Preserved Smith.

      Raymond J. Teller, also known as “the one who talks less than Penn.”

      Sylvester “cracker” Graham.

      I’d say, offer to adopt a walking, talking Graham cracker as a mascot, for the right price of course.

    2. Yes! Someone else made the connect!

      Go Amherst Smallpox Blankets!

      1. We are the first, you are the worst
        Catch the excitement from Lord Amherst
        I hope you get smallpox from my blanket
        As I watch you die, I will spank it
        Rah rah rah

        1. We got poets for alumni and we’ll diss you with sick rhymes
          We have a Graham cracker diet, you gobble fistfuls of pork rinds
          Like Melvil Dewey we’ll deci-mate you
          Like Harlan Fiske Stone with the Constitution, we’ll violate you

  37. This mention of Vanessa Hudgens reminds me of a very special song on Mongrels.

    What a difference a day makes (NSFW unless you have headphones). It’s a sweet duet about true love, inspired in part by the example of Zack Efron and Vanessa Hudgens.

    1. They also have a song in support of Lena Durham

      Ugly Women are Beautiful Too

    2. How in the hell did that get through the YouTube censors.

      Thanks, I needed a good laugh.

  38. ?You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot.

    Just so long as it’s inclusive. And non-culturally appropriative. And doesn’t demean minorities, women, or people of non-Christian faiths. And doesn’t promote ableism. Or violence. Or make the other team feel like Amherst is a hostile environment.

    Ah, fuck it

    1. The Lord Derps…see how easy that was.

    2. Or make the other team feel like Amherst is a hostile environment.

      The name of the school might make American Indians feel like Amherst is a hostile environment.

  39. OK, a thought regarding the prohibitions against any depiction of weapons in place at many schools. Has anyone tested this creatively? T-shirts featuring F-16’s, Trident missiles, B-52 bombers, large rocks, spears, etc?

    1. Totally unenforceable. Anything can be a weapon.

      1. No, totally enforcable, as evidenced by reality, just not fairly so. Yes, anything can be a weapon, but I was thinking of things which are specifically designed as weapons, ie an ICBM, but which are impossible for individuals to acquire.

        1. And, yeah, I know rocks were not designed as weapons, but that’s another prong – anything which could reasonably be a weapon.

        2. How about the Richland Bombers? They have a mushroom cloud on their football helmets and basketball court

      1. How about a hammer & sickle? I doubt the anti-weapon people would object too much to that.

    2. I used to (back in my pre-libertarian Republican days) wear a “peace through superior firepower” shirt with a B-52 making up the arms of a peace sign around campus. But that was before people did anything more than roll their eyes, or in high school, I might have had one teacher give me a 2 minute lecture on being too glib for my own good.

    1. Police equipped with water cannon stood guard over the demolition, while hundreds of migrants – some of whom have lived in the scrubland on the northern French coast for months or years – waited for buses to take them for resettlement across France.

      Looks like the French aren’t going to surrender on this issue.

      1. YYYYYEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

        /CSI: Paris

      2. What part of “resettlement across France” was confusing?

  40. CHECK OUT THE BIG BRAIN ON THIS GUY!

    How much did that delayed-deduction cost the American Taxpayer over the last 20 years?

    1. He should run for President

    2. I really, really, really don’t like James Fuckhead Clapper.

  41. ?Five ways the election could go.

    Wait, I don’t see “Gary Johnson surprise victory” on here…

    Oh…

  42. Wow. I can’t believe a white person acted black. What was she thinking?

    1. Oh, no, she di’n’t!

      Oops…

    2. Cocaine is a helluva drug.

    3. She’s mostly Filipina.

      Jus’ sayin’

      1. What’s funny is I never heard of hear until this article. Maybe more B list actresses should try and piss off the twitterverse.

        1. Look at this guy, acting like he hasn’t seen every season of High School Musical. We’re not buying the act, creep.

          1. I can’t get anything by you. It’s like you’re inside my head.

    4. I’m pretty sure the YAAASS is gay culture appropriation. Oh, and when people call their significant other their partner.

      1. I’m pretty sure the YAAASS is gay culture appropriation.

        Moot point considering at least 75 percent of gay culture is appropriated from black woman culture.

        1. Which was appropriated from Pirate culture.

        2. Does this mean I can’t touch a gay man’s hair?

          1. Depends on which hair you’re talking about.

    5. Braiding her hair was such a black act that it was an ack.

      1. Thank god she didn’t wear a ball cap with the bill off to the side. I dare some white person to do that.

    6. She must have been wigging out.

  43. Grotesque newly-discovered insect boasts FOUR penises, 200 poison glands and 414 legs

    A peculiar new poison-shooting insect has baffled scientists with its extreme defence mechanism – but that’s not the only reason why it has tongues wagging.

    The illacme tobini also possesses an impressive 414 legs – and can handily turn four of them into penises.

    It was discovered in the caves of the Sequoia National Park, part of the Sierra Nevada mountains in Granada, Spain.

    The insect is part of the millipede family and is another species of the illacme penipes, which with 750 legs has the most limbs of all insects.

    I bring you: the Warty-pede.

    1. I dunno. It only has 4 penises.

    2. They have a Sequoia National Park in Spain?

    3. Somehow new species keep getting discovered yet I hear about mass unprecedented extinction of Gaia.

      Wouldn’t tracking that require knowing all the species, and tracking their populations for probably 100 years at least. We don’t know all the species today let alone 10 years ago, but we know a thousand years ago how many species went extinct apparently.

  44. Amhurst should go with a true winner

    http://www.logodesignlove.com/…..ogo-02.jpg

    1. How………could you link this?

      1. You just copy and paste the url into the comment box

  45. Mexican presidents do not yearn to ‘screw’ the country:
    “Our Lovemaking Is Gentle But Forceful… Like that of a kindly uncle, or after-school tutor”

    MEXICO CITY Presidents of Mexico do not wake up thinking how to “screw” the country, current office holder Enrique Pena Nieto said on Tuesday, seeking to defend his record in government and encourage positive thinking.

    Its not corruption = its pervasive negativity. And there is no reason to get cynical just because the law is occasionally ‘selectively enforced’

    1. Yeah, it’s more like, they wake up thinking of how to enrich themselves. The concerns of other people, like those they were nominally elected to represent, don’t even enter into consideration.

    2. I don’t doubt that many politicians genuinely believe socialist ideas bring good results. Separating the myth that caring politicians = good government and uncaring ones bad is critical to understanding that remedying a shitty government isn’t as simple as better TOP MEN.

  46. Dear Reason Staff,

    Your popup advertisement is too scary for me.

    Sincerely,

    waffles

      1. The popup defeated my adblock.

        1. I only saw the popup once, but I am now seeing the “You May Like” sponsored links at the bottom of articles, though they all link back to other articles on reason. It’s kind of weird. I blame Russian hackers. Or squirrelz. Or perhaps Russian squirrelz.

      2. It doesn’t stop the scary clown Hillary and Trump. I said it before but it’s more true now than ever. The clown crisis continues unabated.

    1. I complained about that shit earlier.

      Also, the “Promoted Storeis/You May Like” garbage defeated my AdBlock. To remove it, add

      ||taboola.com

      to a custom filter.

  47. Government Healthcare at its finest:

    Doctors praise DIY surgery skills of diabetic ex-soldier, 57, who chopped off his own toes with PLIERS after his operation was cancelled

    A diabetic former soldier used pliers to cut off his own toes after his operation was cancelled at the last minute.
    Paul Dibbins, 57, had been due to have his leg removed below the knee after suffering frost bite on his feet while repairing a car in wintry conditions.
    But, when the surgery was called off by the NHS, the fed up father-of-three decided to treat the condition himself.
    Mr Dibbins initially spent months trying to heal his toes, but was told six months later that he had developed gangrene and they would have to be removed.
    But, when he had to wait six weeks for an operation, Mr Dubbins decided to cut off the toes himself.
    The former army Lance Corporal – who did not take any painkillers – used his first aid knowledge to scrape off the dead flesh around the two toes on his right foot.

    Having to wait six weeks for surgery to remove gangrene. Fucking savages.

    1. Hey, but look on the bright side. No one made a profit.

      1. Are you kidding? Someone at that hospital is going to get a bonus for keeping costs down.

        Fucking savages.

    2. “Why don’t the rest of you lazy clods learn from Mr. Dobbin’s fine example!” – Head of the NHS /sarc

      1. “UNLICENSED LABOUR!”, counters the medical association.

        Then we have a two-week row in the press, followed by threats, only ended when the Minister sprinkles some cash and promises.

    3. I guessed “Daily Mail”.

      Daily Mail it was.

      Please, please, UK, never let your tabloids die.

    4. You have to toe the bottom line!

    5. “Sunseeker
      NHS envy of the world, only to the people in Ethiopia.”

      Bingo. Canadians say the same stupid things about our universal care.

  48. You Quit Smoking to Avoid Cancer
    But Then Eating Pussy Did You in

    The startling numbers ? published in a report on Tuesday by FAIR Health an independent nonprofit ? are based on a database of more than 21 billion privately billed medical and dental claims. They illustrate both the cascading effect of human papillomavirus (HPV) in the United States and our changing sexual practices.

    The American Cancer Society estimates that nearly 50,000 Americans will be infected this year, with 9,500 dying from the disease. In past generations, oral cancer was mostly linked to smoking, alcohol use or a combination of the two. But even as smoking rates have fallen, oral cancer rates have remained about the same, and researchers have documented in recent studies that this may be caused by HPV.

    HPV infects cells of the skin and the membranes that lines areas such as the mouth, throat, tongue, tonsils, rectum and sexual organs. Transmission can occur when these areas come into contact with the virus. HPV is a leading cause of cervical, vaginal and penile cancers.

    Surveys have shown that younger men are more likely to perform oral sex than their older counterparts and have a tendency to engage with more partners.

    1. Don’t eat the pussy, just grab it instead.

  49. Just finished voting. Outside the poll I saw every kind of sign except Hildog. Maybe people are pulling the lever for her, but I didn’t see any enthusiastic supporters in Orlando, which is traditionally a blue city.

    1. I’ll be pulling the Johnson lever pretty vigorously

      1. I know what you mean, wink wink nudge nudge…

      2. Just make sure you clean up.

      3. If you think about it there could be a double meaning there.

      4. If someone just jerks off in the booth they count it as a vote for Johnson, right?

    2. I drove across central Minnesoda yesterday and the boy and I only saw Trump signs on interstate 94. Not one Hillary sign. We saw plenty of signs for the DFL (Democratic Farmer Labor) candidates for Congress.

      Don’t know if it is significant, but it was strange.

      1. I haven’t seen hardly any signs for Trump or Hildog (or much of anyone else, really) here in CO. You’d almost think there wasn’t an election going on.

        1. I’ve seen a few Hillary stickers around town, but they’ve all been driven by white yuppies in places like Greenwood Village.

  50. This seems like a rather extreme reaction.

    Man cuts off his penis after parents forced him to marry a second time

    Sharjah: A 26-year-old married Asian man cut off his penis following a dispute with his family members who were forcing him to marry again.
    He was rushed to a hospital by his brother, along with the dismembered organ. The incident took place nine days ago.
    Dr. Younis Al Shamsi, consultant and head of Urology at Al Qasimi Hospital, who performed the three-hour surgery said that the organ was successfully reattached.
    Describing it as a rare case, Dr Al Shamsi said the man, who is recovering at the hospital, was probably suffering from some form of mental illness to have subjected himself to such an act.
    Dr Al Shamsi said the incident occurred when the man’s parents were forcing him to marry again despite the fact that he has a wife who is living in his home country.

    1. In what culture are men forced to marry?

      1. In any culture where the individual is the property of the elders of his clan?

      2. None. In all countries men live like kings and enjoy full self ownership.
        /feminist derp

    2. was the organ dismembered or was he?

    3. Dr Al Shamsi said the man, who is recovering at the hospital, was probably suffering from some form of mental illness to have subjected himself to such an act.

      Ya think?!?

    4. Man cuts off his penis after parents forced him to marry a second time

      Er, that’ll show em?

      1. Killing his first wife didn’t work.

  51. http://www.bloomberg.com/news/…..thy-people

    Etna CEO “young people pick beer over Obamacare”. Don’t they know their societal duties? It always comes back to the wreckers and saboteurs doesn’t it? There ought to be a law against these sorts. They are nothing but enemies, enemies of the people.

    1. Headline is terrible, but what he actually said is totally correct.

      “As the rates rise, the healthier people pull out because the out-of-pocket costs aren’t worth it,” Bertolini said at Bloomberg’s The Year Ahead Summit in New York. “Young people can do the math. Gas for the car, beer on Fridays and Saturdays, health insurance.”

      1. Clearly we just need to increase the subsidies! /sarc

        I’m sure someone will propose this non-sarcastically any day now.

        1. I already heard that on the NPR.

          1. Yes, it’s already been confirmed that the ‘subsidies rise proportionately with the rise in premiums’.

            Laugh it up, but it’s going to be your tax dollars covering the increased costs, not the millennial-kegger crowd.

            1. and the attitude is ‘since most get subsidies anyway, what’s the problem?’
              argh

              1. Just like that, money created out of nothing. Proof that Obama is a god?

    2. Wasn’t there a ReasonTV bit where Nick Gillepsie was interviewing folks without health insurance. A bunch of them had, what amounted to, other priorities for their money.

    3. To be fair, young people pick beer over basically everything.

      1. As they rationally should.

        1. Not me. I drink wine.

          And I bite my thumb at thee, plebs.

    4. What? Young healthy people want beer more than overpriced heatlhcare insurance that they don’t need or want?

      What is this world coming to? Democrats are going to have so scold these youngsters again, “We hate you, now take your Obamacare and like it!” First voting for Gary Johnson, and now this!

      1. Maybe we should try and re-educate these people. Maybe set up a system of government run resorts where these people could go and stay until they are reeducated and have lost their wrecker tendencies and bad ideas?

        1. These resorts would have to be set up so that they aren’t distracted by frivolous entertainments.

          The resorts should be serious places conducive to productive learning.

          Places for concentrating.

      2. But young people also vote for Obama and other pols who want universal healthcare. Like how greenies fly around on jets and preach the dangers of fossil fuels.

        Healthcare should be free and I shouldn’t have to pay for it.

  52. I am traveling in Utah this week. Zero trump signs. Zero. I saw more Trump signs in Sacramento, California. I have searched SLC, Ogden, and Logan. Nothing. Lots of signs for other R’s at the state level.

    1. Utah doesn’t like to advertise.

  53. Vanessa Hudgens Guilty of Cultural Appropriation

    I’d like to culturally appropriate her pants in a pile on my bedroom floor, if you know what I mean.

    1. Yoga pants are not pants.

      1. And that’s why we love them so

      2. OMG. You don’t get to judge how I dress.

        *organizes protest*

        1. they already had the yoga pants protest parade

  54. WaPo Publishes Self-Vindicating Confessional =

    How Trump Is To Blame for My Irrational, Criminal Behavior

    I realize I shouldn’t be proud of my transgression. Hanging out with a bunch of moms, we started grousing about the proliferation of signs. Can you believe someone would put that many Trump signs so close together on our roads? It’s so rude. Who is this jerk? We felt assaulted by the number of signs. The idea of “cleansing” our streets seemed like the fastest way to restore balance and alleviate our election stress

    The escapade was not premeditated: We simply jumped into my Jetta wagon, drove down to the strip and got to work. In all, it took less than 20 minutes. We grabbed about 40 signs and threw them in the hatchback. I hadn’t really thought about what I would do with the signs; I just wanted them gone. At the time, we believed we were doing the right thing. There were so many Trump signs up and down our main drag ? it was destroying all sense of equilibrium in our community.

    ‘Equilibrium’ is a funny term for an admittedly unbalanced person.

    1. Shouldn’t the Post, I don’t know, relieve him of his writing duties if he admits that Trump drives him into irrational criminality? It really doesn’t speak well for the quality of pieces they’re putting out.

      (Of course, we all know WaPo has been shit for sometime now, but it’s surprising to see them explicitly acknowledge it.)

      1. That was written by a man?

        1. “She’s married with a 10 year old daughter”…

          So, what passes for a man at the WP.

        2. I committed a crime this month, along with two of my friends. I’m not the lawbreaking type. In fact, as a 52-year-old mom, my life is pretty predictable and boring. But this election, a particular candidate’s boasts about women pushed me over the edge.

          This is the beginning of an article from The Onion, you liar.

          1. Either The Onion or Penthouse Forum.

            1. Either The Onion or Penthouse Forum.

              So much this.

          2. These people are putting the Onion out of business.

      2. Yeah, ever since that libertarian Bezos took it over, it’s nothing but libertarian articles, just like we were warned.

        1. Tonight on Insane Clown Posse Comitatus, it’s libertarian Bezos vs libertarian Bozos.

    2. You know who else was only “cleansing” the streets?

      1. Travis Bickle?

    3. The escapade was not premeditated: We simply jumped into my Jetta wagon, drove down to the strip and got to work.

      She has a funny definition of premeditated.

      1. Not only was it premeditated; it was a conspiracy.

    4. I was afraid that declining this man’s offer would insult one of my organization’s largest donors. So I told him I needed “to think about it.” A few days later, he told me he’d made a mistake.

      I should have told him to go to hell. Instead, I told my boyfriend (now husband) about it and buried the secret. I was silenced, until now.

      This fuckin’ shit has to be made up. It’s too cliche.

    5. We felt assaulted by the number of signs.

      W-what?!

      At the time, we believed we were doing the right thing.

      WHAT?!

    6. So, this woman basically admits to being so unstable that fucking SIGNS drove her to commit a criminal act…..and she’s proud enough of it to publish the story in the Washington Post. Sounds like a real winner.

      1. Don’t be fooled, it’s not a mea culpa, it’s a plea to vote for Hillary Clinton, disguised as humility.

        1. Not very humble of her, considering it was THE TRUMPSTER what drover her to do the deed.

          “I broke the law, but have you heard about Donald’s transgressions? I can’t even with signs for him!”

    7. that many Trump signs so close together on our roads?

      Obligatory “Muh…Muh Roads!”

    8. If someone wrote an article about stealing Hillary signs, some progs would be clamoring to bring back the death penalty.

    1. I wonder if he is still invited to the Paul family get-togethers.

    2. Was hoping it would be Dondero.

      Sheesh, Benton, get your shit together.

    3. He’s soo … Podesta-y.

  55. I’m truly surprised Pittsburgh Pirate John Jaso has been given a dreadlocked pass. White guys from Humboldt County are grandfathered in, I guess.

    1. He’s a fucking Pirate!

  56. Ross Douthat, pushes a few buttons

    The dangers of a Hillary Clinton presidency are more familiar than Trump’s authoritarian unknowns, because we live with them in our politics already. They’re the dangers of elite groupthink, of Beltway power worship, of a cult of presidential action in the service of dubious ideals. They’re the dangers of a recklessness and radicalism that doesn’t recognize itself as either, because it’s convinced that if an idea is mainstream and commonplace among the great and good then it cannot possibly be folly.

    Almost every crisis that has come upon the West in the last 15 years has its roots in this establishmentarian type of folly. The Iraq War, which liberals prefer to remember as a conflict conjured by a neoconservative cabal, was actually the work of a bipartisan interventionist consensus, pushed hard by George W. Bush but embraced as well by a large slice of center-left opinion that included Tony Blair and more than half of Senate Democrats.

    Likewise the financial crisis: Whether you blame financial-services deregulation or happy-go-lucky housing policy (or both), the policies that helped inflate and pop the bubble were embraced by both wings of the political establishment.

    I can’t wait to read the comments.

    1. They’re the dangers of a recklessness and radicalism that doesn’t recognize itself as either, because it’s convinced that if an idea is mainstream and commonplace among the great and good then it cannot possibly be folly.

      I coined a term for this: Ideological capture. One of these PM links, I’mma post a textbook example of this.

    2. I can’t wait to read the comments.

      Don’t bother. It seems all of them are some variety of “NOBODY’S PERFECT!! AND NOT-HILLARY IS WORSERS!!!”

      This is the most-sophisticated version of it =

      Hillary Clinton is one of the most dishonest, untrustworthy candidates to ever run for President. She is fortunate to have a opponent who is not only totally unqualified to be President but who is a racist, a demagogue, and a sexual predator who has appealed to the basest instincts of the American people and ran a campaign of bigotry, intolerance, hate, insults, and mean spiritedness.

      I wish a moderate Republican had won the nomination. Unlike many other people I do not paint all Republicans with a broad brushstroke and have many Republican friends who are pro choice, believe that we must do something now about climate change, support gay marriage, and who also support immigration reform and major spending to repair our nations infrastructure.

      If any other Republican had won the nomination, even if it was moderate Republican from the northeast and Midatlantic States I have no doubt whatsoever that the Clinton’s would have ran a scorched earth campaign against them. Ms. Clinton feels she was owed the nomination and the Presidency, and that she is the most qualified woman in a nation of 330 people to be President. I beg to differ.

      I am voting for Hillary Clinton not because I want to but because I have to.

      1. and have many Republican friends who are pro choice,

        I too have many black friends.

      2. Republican friends who are pro choice, believe that we must do something now about climate change, support gay marriage, and who also support immigration reform and major spending to repair our nations infrastructure.

        Oh jesus, I just read the whole quote. Those “Republicans” you know? Yeah.

        1. I love how they always throw in gay marriage, like it fucking matters to anyone anymore and Trump doesn’t support it. They really are on autopilot.

          And I wish them luck with gay marriage after Hillary imports ten or twenty million more Muslims.

        2. In other words, there are the bad republicans, and then there are Republicans who agree with Democrats in everything. Got it.

      3. Unlike many other people I do not paint all Republicans with a broad brushstroke and have many Republican friends who are pro choice, believe that we must do something now about climate change, support gay marriage, and who also support immigration reform and major spending to repair our nations infrastructure.

        I wonder if this is actually true or if they’re just indulging this hyper-partisan head case. Because people who support those policies are typically called “Democrats.”

        1. I doubt it’s true. And the republicans could have ran a bag of sand and they would be convinced it was the most vile, rapey, racist, sexist, xenophobic, Hitler bag of sand ever. If only they nominated that other bag of sand we would have voted for it.

          Really they just don’t have any good reason to vote for Hillary and can’t really justify her corruptitude so they have to invent a reason.

          1. Pretty much. They can’t even describe why they hate Trumpkins without ending up describing why they hate regular Republicans, despite the fact that the former are closer to being Democrats than the latter.

    3. I can’t wait to read the comments.

      Did anyone comment, “Ross Douthat, I Doubt-that!”

      No? Keep reading, someone will eventually.

    4. Wow, I can’t believe the NYT actually published something non-retarded. They must be really certain that Herself is going to win no matter what in order to let that go through. Probably only they can claim to be balanced: “See! We published one editorial critical of Hillary, what bias?!”

  57. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot. I suggest we all flood the college with the following suggestion: “Mascot McMascotFace.”

    Shouldn’t that be Mascotty McMascotFace?

    1. Go easy on Robby. He’s new to Reason, to libertarianism, to puberty, to internets.

      1. Originality?

    2. Douche McDoucheFace….oops Lord Douche McDoucheFace

  58. If case pussy-eating cancer didn’t ruin your dinner… JUST WAIT, THERE’S MORE!

    Jock Itch? Well It Might Also Be OCTOPUS CANCER
    EMPD = A new and terrible thing to happen to your nutsack.

    Not to be confused with EPMD, which is also upset about what is on your jock

  59. From an article by William McGurn in the Wall Street Journal:

    “This is liberal ultramontanism, in which Pope Francis is deemed to speak authoritatively when he sounds like the Democratic Party but not so much when he makes less-publicized comments on, say, gender confusion or unborn life.

    “To defend this pick-and-choose, Progressive Catholicism invokes Catholic social teaching. It is true, this teaching has a richness and breadth far beyond abortion. But it is also true that this teaching is more about principles than conclusions, as in the calculations of a just war. So how is it that the much-covered “Nuns on the Bus” seem to know exactly where He would stand on Citizens United?”

    1. “…Moore argued that people have spent too much time this year focusing on why Donald Trump would be a bad president, rather than on why Hillary Clinton would be a good one.”

      By “people,” does he mean “Hillary”?

    2. One day, the Democrats will fix Flint!

  60. Regarding Schumu, after the Tidal kerfuffle she posted a very fetching photo on Instagram.

    1. You notice she hides her 9 yr old face.

      1. Must be from when she was 9, if that’s actually her. Her real ass has to be five times that size and ten times the width.

        1. Its called photo shop. Even if she did lose enough weight to look that good, her skin would not be that smooth.

          I would still go to bed with her before I would Beyonce. I find Beyonce incredibly unattractive.

          1. I would still go to bed with her before I would Beyonce. I find Beyonce incredibly unattractive.

            You are certifiably insane.

            1. No. Despite my reputation to the contrary, women with giant asses do nothing for me. And Beyonce’s awful personality ruins whatever attractiveness she might have. She does nothing for me. She has a giant ass. That is really her only distinctive feature.

          2. Professor Peach likes ’em big!

      1. She made a parody of Beyonc?’s “Formation” and Twitter wasn’t too happy about it.

        1. [Insert “I’ll be in my safe space” joke here]

  61. You can help Amherst College choose its first official mascot. I suggest we all flood the college with the following suggestion: “Mascot McMascotFace.”

    Has no-one chosen the Amherst Smallpox Blankets???

    1. “Mascot McMascotFace.”

      Robby is anything but original, isn’t he?

      That is also what tipped me off that he was responsible for the links. (Initially skipped the byline)

      1. You can tell when Robbie has the links duty. His lists tend to be the least contaminated by newsworthy or interesting items.

  62. I hope Hillary is a do-nothing President because according to Reason, she’s a do-nothing candidate.

    1. because he had relied on Mrs. Clinton to make sure that using a private account did not break any laws.

      *sigh*

      Ok, Obama is in fact smarter than I’ve given him credit for.

      He has managed to stay out of this mess in a way I’ve never seen another public official succeed. The dude is just *poof* gone from any scrutiny surrounding the actions of his own administration.

      1. It’s still negligence on his part, to see a non-standard address and just assume everything is legal, without actually checking into it. But maybe not gross negligence.

    2. You’ll be waiting a long time. They lost my donation this year. Extra gruel for the orphans though!

      1. It’s certainly helped me connect the dots on where Hillary stands on Pot Legalization.

        1. Think she’ll derail that train once in office? Obama looked away from the legalization wave in a 10th amendment sort of way, but would she continue his policy of indifference?

  63. Comedy writer has exactly the right response to his kid’s Fahrenheit 451 permission slip

    Daily Show writer Daniel Radosh’s son came home from school with a permission slip that he’d have to sign before the kid could read Ray Bradbury’s novel Fahrenheit 451, which is widely believed to be an anti-censorship book

    Dad’s note:

    I love this letter! What a wonderful way to introduce students to the theme of Fahrenheit 451 that books are so dangerous that the institutions of society — schools and parents — might be willing to team up against children to prevent them from reading one. It’s easy enough to read the book and say, ‘This is crazy. It could never really happen,’ but pretending to present students at the start with what seems like a totally reasonable ‘first step’ is a really immersive way to teach them how insidious censorship can be I’m sure that when the book club is over and the students realize the true intent of this letter they’ll be shocked at how many of them accepted it as an actual permission slip. In addition, Milo’s concern that allowing me to add this note will make him stand out as a troublemaker really brings home why most of the characters find it easier to accept the world they live in rather than challenge it. I assured him that his teacher would have his back.

      1. Except the permission slip was actually to watch Fahrenheit 9/11, not read a book

    1. That is probably the one funny thing writer at the Daily Show has ever written. They should give him an award or something.

    2. *teacher’s reaction after reading the note*

      Wha… so… is that a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’?

    3. I censor my kids from all sorts of things. I think a distinction between adults and children is necessary.

      My guess is since he works for the daily show he only sees a distinction between hate speech and goodthink.

  64. Imagine if “But It Was Performance Art!” were the excuse given by the person who ran him over.

    PORTLAND, Maine (AP) ? A man arrested for blocking traffic in Maine while dressed as an evergreen tree says the public display was intended to be performance art.

    Asher Woodworth tells the Portland Press Herald (http://bit.ly/2eIWl74 ) his embodiment of a tree inching across a busy downtown Portland intersection was designed to reflect a contrast in the “energies of economy and efficiency and the energies of slowness and magic.”

    “My Dodge Ram 2500’s dynamic sublimation of the tree was an embodiment of Man’s conquest of nature through evolution, and a testament to the triumph of necessity over self-indulgence “

    1. “energies of economy and efficiency and the energies of slowness and magic.”

      energies of economy and efficiency
      energies of slowness and magic

  65. Five ways the election could go.

    1. Clinton wins. Shooting war with Russia. Possible Nuclear War.

    2. Clinton wins. Third American Civil War over second amendment. The Revolutionary War counts as the first.

    3. Clinton wins. Expansion of the police state. Increased racial tensions.

    4. Clinton wins. Complete collapse of the health care industry. Possible economic collapse.

    5. Clinton wins. Seen as an illegitimate. President. Collaspe of the rule of law.

    1. It all boils down to this: Clinton wins, collapse of the rule of law.

  66. CNN ORC Poll is garbage

    Shows that CNN over-sampled 65+ voters and undersampled 45 and younger voters.

    1. We all know no one under 45 votes!

    2. So you’re saying that they changed their sampling from registered to likely voters?

    3. Two of the kids I work with have told me that they are writing in Bernie. I’m cool with that even though I hate communists with a passion. I just glad they are not voting for Hillary.

      1. Bernie is showing up in CA commercials telling people to vote for a very stupid state prop. He’s so likable I sometimes forget how ridiculous his actual policies are.

    4. In another news, Gary Johnson reveals himself to be among the segment of the US population who doesn’t understand statistics and doesn’t know what “oversampled” means.

  67. I suggest we all flood the college with the following suggestion: “Mascot McMascotFace.”

    How dare Amherst appropriate Scottish names and culture for their mascot?

    1. No one cares for the scots. Or the Irish

  68. Two Undiscovered Dark Moons Appear to Be Hiding Near Uranus

    The dark moonlets would be less than nine miles across.

    1. Dingle and Berry.

  69. “I stand by what I told Rolling Stone. I believed it to be true at the time,”

    You really are a piece of work, Jackie.

    1. Until all the suing is over, I would advise her to stick to that line, no matter what.

  70. Blockquote>Actress Vanessa Hudgens donned some African braids and woah that’s problematic. Has she even heard of cultural appropriation?

    So, I clicked on the link. God help me, I clicked on the link. Is that what passes for reporting today? Is that what Columbia Journalism majors aspire to? A list of people’s Twitters? Nothing else?

    Twitter is already annoying as feth when someone links through it – you have to wade through a dozen unrelated conversations to find the fucking *point* – but this isn’t even trying. People get paid for that?

  71. until I looked at the paycheck saying $4730 , I did not believe that…my… brother woz like actualy bringing in money part time from there computar. . there friend brother started doing this for less than 7 months and resently paid for the morgage on there home and bought a new Cadillac …….

    …….. http://www.jobprofit9.com

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