Social Media Sites Under Attack, Russian Air Strikes on Aleppo Called War Crimes, Court Rules in Planned Parenthood's Favor: A.M. Links

• 

  Sigrid Olsson/S. Olsson / Altopress/Newscom

  Twitter, Reddit, Spotify, and a host of other websites were down or experiencing problems this morning in what looks like a largescale distributed denial of service (DDoS) attack. (Also to blame for the late links this morning!)

• There was a fancy dinner last night where Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were seated nearby each other and for some reason everyone got excited about it.
• The United Nations human-rights head called recent air strikes against Aleppo war crimes. He "did not specifically name Russia, whose war planes have carried out weeks of air strikes on the rebel-held part of Aleppo along with the Syrian air force, but his reference was clear," Reuters reported.
• A U.S. District Court yesterday blocked Mississippi's law banning medical providers that offers abortions from receiving any state Medicaid money, in a case brought by Planned Parenthood clinics.
• Spain's constitutional court has overturned a ban on bullfighting, finding the Catalonian law unconstitutional.
• An Oakland police officer will be arraigned today on one misdemeanor count of engaging in prostitution and two felony counts of conspiracy to obstuct justice for paying a sex worker to sleep with him and tipping her off about raids. The charges, spurred by activity that recently occured, are unrelated to the other prostitution scandal gripping the Oakland Police Department.

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

Casual Friday.

[Rufus The Monocled]

Hello.

ENB is the sort of gal who runs into work late with hastily applied make up saying ‘I’m sorry I’m late but my car wouldn’t start!’

I think.

[AlmightyJB]

She doesn’t need make up you tool.

[Crusty Juggler]

Someone put on their “old stereotyping” pants on today, didn’t they? Sheesh. Makeup isn’t just for ladies anymore, Mr. Misogynist-Pants.

Also, since ENB is a well-known hipster it would be much smarter to assume she woke up this morning to find her unicycle tire’s air was low, and yes she probably had to ask a man to fix it for her.

[Lee Genes]

her unicycle tire’s air was low, and yes she probably had to ask a man to fix it for her

Thankfully there seem to be a lot of clowns around lately.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

It’s a pretty good excuse, as far as euphemisms go.

[Rufus The Monocled]

My thong wouldn’t fit!

http://www.spicylingerie.com/cq138x.html

[AceDroman]

-1
Model has no ass and should not be allowed to model lingerie.

[Zeb]

Looks OK to me.

[Rhywun]

Makeup isn’t just for ladies anymore

I love how the media is pushing really hard to make that happen, and nobody’s buying it.

[Zeb]

Does beard glitter count?

[Tonio]

I miss Postrel, at least then there was order.

[Krabappel]

She made the trains run on time?

[Swiss Servator]

She offered the world ORDER!

[Fist of Etiquette]

Twitter, Reddit, Spotify, and a host of other websites were down or experiencing problems this morning…

AND REASON.COM.

[PBR Streetgang]

Russian cyber attack. Calling it now

[CatoTheChipper]

By Putin himself.

Finally Vlad understands that his Manchurian candidate’s Twitter proclivities are hurting is chances.

[PBR Streetgang]

See. You get it.

[AlmightyJB]

Or Facebook. What’s a reddit and spotify?

[AlexInCT]

Kind of like a Clevland Steamer….

[Rhywun]

Didn’t we (the US) just recently hand control of the Internet off to some shadowy “multinational” outfit? It’s hard to find buried under all the news of Trump saying something horrible last night.

[Gadfly]

Yes, the US recently handed over the internet registry to an international, nonprofit organization that had been running it under US oversight previously. From what I’ve read, it seems like the tech industry generally supported the move. Whether the organization will be able to maintain its independence is the big question. If it can, things will continue to run as normal. If not, who knows.

[? Aggressor]

CIA/Biden cyber attack, they just fucked it up and hit the wrong target proportionally

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

What the fuck is a reddit?

[westernsloper]

From what I have seen, Reditt is where progs go to agree with each other, on any given topic, that all the little people are entitled to rich peoples money.

[Tyler.C]

See i thought reddit was a mor civil version of 4chan

[Gadfly]

It depends on the subforum. It seems like most of the subforums that don’t have to do with hobbies and pastimes do devolve into echo chambers, but there are some that aren’t echoing the leftist line.

[Fist of Etiquette]

(Also to blame for the late links this morning!)

Fine.

[Swiss Servator]

I THINK NOT!

[Fist of Etiquette]

It was an undedicated denial of links attack.

[Swiss Servator]

^THIS^

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

Mmmm-hmmm.

[PBR Streetgang]

Mr. Foval! When you said you hire homeless men to do “some crazy stuff’ and then you get them a shower, hotel room and dinner….what did you mean?

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

Mr. Foval! When you said you hire homeless men to do “some crazy stuff’ and then you get them a shower, hotel room and dinner….what did you mean?

It wasn’t always in that order. Next question!

[Tonio]

Heh. Nice alias. Welcome aboard if you are new.

[Tonio]

Crap. Hi, Junior.

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

Hello, Tonio.

[bacon-magic]

Lol, great name Jr.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

How much is the fine?

[Bee Tagger]

Spain’s constitutional court has overturned a ban on bullfighting, finding the Catalonian law unconstitutional.

Where do they stand on cockfighting? Or cuckfighting?

[Fruit Sushi 2 Go]

…..but I thought frogs were French?

*ducks*

[Johnny Hit n Run Paulene]

Ducks are on planes, silly!

[Rufus The Monocled]

It’s pronounced ‘cokefighting’, Lil’ Jerry.

[Citizen X]

Kochfighting?

[Juvenile Bluster]

Twitter, Reddit, Spotify, and a host of other websites were down or experiencing problems this morning in what looks like a largescale distributed denial of service (DDoS) attack. (Also to blame for the late links this morning!)

Suuuuure.

[Crusty Juggler]

Also to blame for the late links this morning!

That’s it – it’s time to bomb the shit out of Russia.

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

It’s always time.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

For peace!

[Swiss Servator]

For Great Justice!

[Chip Woodier]

Someone set up us the Obama!

[Fruit Sushi 2 Go]

Ohio mother’s confession details how she smothered her three young sons with blankets ‘so they would never abuse women’

An Ohio mother charged with suffocating her three young sons said in a recorded police interview that she smothered each boy with a blanket because she didn’t want them to suffer.

Brittany Pilkington, 24, also said in her taped confession she was depressed and worried her sons would eventually become abusive toward women.

[Swiss Servator]

So, martyr treatment on several derptastic sites?

[tarran]

That story is such a shitshow.

In July, [Brittany] Pilkington’s husband, 44-year-old Joseph Pilkington, pleaded guilty to sexual imposition for having sex with his wife before they were married and getting her pregnant when she was just 17 years old.
Before marrying her, the man had been in a long-term relationship with Brittany’s mother and had lived with her under one roof from the time she was nine.

[Lee Genes]

Class act

[Brett L]

Right. There it is. The old Humbert Humbert.

[Tonio]

^This.

[$park? is totally a Swifty]

There ya go, mitigating circumstances.

[AlmightyJB]

Jerry Springer needs to eat too.

[RBS]

In which Ohio continues to Florida a run for its money.

[RBS]

In which Ohio continues to Florida a run for its money.

[$park? is totally a Swifty]

To Florida- that actually kinda works.

[EDG reppin LBC]

Is it a verb? Adverb?

So last weekend, I drank a 5th of bourbon, and snorted an 8-ball and went completely Floridal at the dog racing track.

[Brett L]

So you were racing the dogs down the track and winning?

[EDG reppin LBC]

I was racing the dogs, but the track was closed because the demons. I bit the nose off the security guard and stole his taser, and tried to make the demons go away by repeatedly tasing my scrotum.

[Brett L]

Here is your official Certificate of Florida Manhood

[Swiss Servator]

Certificate? That is almost enough to make him a State Senator!

[Brett L]

He didn’t try to steal anything, nor is he the idiot son of some successful business owner, so he’s going to have a hard row to hoe to get there.

[Isaac Bartram]

I’ve always said that if you check the birthplace of the “Florida man”, you’ll more than likely find that it’s Ohio, Western PA or Upstate NY.

[Florida Hipster]

Well…she’s not wrong. They won’t abuse women.

[straffinrun]

Not sure. Pearly Gates? St. “Peter”? Sounds like rape culture up there.

[This Machine]

Uh. Wow. Ordinarily I would have something snarky and insensitive to say but, uh, damn. This is terrible.

[Longtorso, Johnny]

See, I’m not the only one posting these.

[$park? is totally a Swifty]

Sounds legit, set her free.

[westernsloper]

“worried her sons would eventually become abusive toward women.”

Given the fact they were being raised by an insane woman, that fear may have been credible.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

Pilkington’s husband, 44-year-old Joseph Pilkington, pleaded guilty to sexual imposition for having sex with his wife before they were married and getting her pregnant when she was just 17 years old.

It’s crazy all the way down.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

Brittany Pilkington, 24

Related to Karl Pilkington?

[Fist of Etiquette]

There was a fancy dinner last night where Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were seated nearby each other and for some reason everyone got excited about it.

Dolan got a lot of elbows.

[Juvenile Bluster]

Spain’s constitutional court has overturned a ban on bullfighting, finding the Catalonian law unconstitutional.

Is it wrong if I feel happy any time I read about a bullfighter getting gored?

[Swiss Servator]

Nah, it is supposed to be a even fight (well, if you go t rid of the picadors, etc).

[Florida Hipster]

I wouldn’t mind bull fighting as much if it was fair. Weakening the bull ahead of the fight is pussy stuff. Round here, our clowns fight the bull unarmed. Think of that Spain.

[$park? is totally a Swifty]

This is why clowns are so scary.

[Johnny Hit n Run Paulene]

Explains why clowns and bullfighting is outlawed here. My world makes sense now!

[Swiss Servator]

SEE, PRISSY SPAIN GUYS, OUR RODEO CLOWNZ ARE TOUGHER ‘EN YOU!!!!

*slams Stetson on and chugs Coors*

[Citizen X]

An American tourist was visiting a small town in Spain, and after taking in a bullfight went to a small restaurant near the bullring. He asked the waiter to bring him the daily special, and a few minutes later was presented with a plate with two large round objects on it.

“What is this?” he asked.

“Cojones,” the waiter replied. “They are from the bull who lost the fight.”

The tourist was dubious, but he tried them anyway, and found them delicious.

Many years later, the tourist was visiting the same small town, and noticing a bullfight had just ended, rushed back to the restaurant and ordered the special. This time, the cojones that came out were small and wrinkled and tasted terrible.

“What happened?” he asked the waiter. “The last time i was here, the cojones were much bigger and tastier.”

“Ah,” said the waiter. “But the bull does not always lose.”

[straffinrun]

The euphemisms for the election are getting spot on.

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

You know, I’m not exactly Captain Animal Rights or anything, but bullfighting is just goddamn stupid.

[Longtorso, Johnny]

I prefer rodeo. The bull comes in uninjured, and both the bull (who just has to put up with a 200 lb man on his back for 8 seconds) and the man are supposed to come out uninjured.

[Florida Hipster]

Last PBR I saw most of the riders were wearing face cages. I guess there has been a shift on the looking tough/safety ratio.

[Brett L]

They also wear body armor and their hats are basically crash helmets even when they look like cowboy hats.

[Florida Hipster]

I’m fine with it. For awhile half the guys just work regular clothes and half had safety equipment. There’s no need to die for a sport.

[Brett L]

Yeah. I would say that it probably allows the riders to take more risks, as you don’t have to worry so much about getting your ribs pulverized and your head hitting the ground at 30 mph with nothing to take the blow. Just pointing out to the non-followers of the sport that these guys aren’t just taping up last week’s injuries, throwing on a workshirt and their old Stetson and getting the shit knocked out of them anymore. In case Urban Cowboy was their only exposure.

[11H1P, Professional Beach Bum]

*Ahem* Gladiatorial contestants and Romans disagree…

[11H1P, Professional Beach Bum]

That was in response to the no need to die for a sport from FH

[Florida Hipster]

I know it’s a bit, but most gladiator fights didn’t end in death.

[11H1P, Professional Beach Bum]

I know, too expensive to train and maintain them. Criminals/those under sentence of death on the other hand…

[Rhywun]

The amusing part is that the ban isn’t because it’s cruel, it’s because it’s cultural appropriation from their Castilian overlords.

[Zeb]

Or perhaps cultural imperialism by the Castilians.

Though there are a lot in Spain who do want to ban it. Which I find disappointing. Spain used to be different, but they are turning into just another whiny Euro-wimps.

[Zeb]

I guess this is an unpopular view, but I quite like Spanish style bullfighting.

The bulls get pretty much the nicest life possible for 3 or 4 years and then has a really shitty last 15 minutes or so. And it’s not as if feed lots, cattle trucks and slaughterhouses are a good time.

[Florida Hipster]

I don’t think it should be banned, I just won’t watch it. Bull poker? Now that’s a good time.

[Zeb]

I also enjoy American rodeo, but bull poker is a new one to me.

[Bee Tagger]

Twitter, Reddit, Spotify, and a host of other websites were down or experiencing problems this morning in what looks like a largescale distributed denial of service (DDoS) attack

So it wasn’t me being shadowbanned by Twitter after all? Time to eat some serious crow on various message boards.

[Swiss Servator]

Pretend it never happened.

[Pat (PM)]

“Say it wasn’t you“

[This Machine]

Whoa, hey, that’s not how the internet works. You gotta double-down on your claims, not retract them! Deny, deny, counter-accuse, deny, demand an apology.

Sheesh.

[John DeWitt]

aka The Von Trumpian plan

[WTF]

Sounds Clintonian to me.

[Gadfly]

It’s Clintrumpian. Bipartisanship FTW!

[Crusty Juggler]

Spain’s constitutional court has overturned a ban on bullfighting, finding the Catalonian law unconstitutional.

I can now continue my quest to become the next Ernest Hemingway.

[Swiss Servator]

Now if you could just find a World War to experience…

Then drink moar, and fish moar.

[Citizen X]

Hillary’s working on the World War thing.

[Brett L]

Drinking yourself to death and talking shit about other people is hardly embarking on a quest.

[Johnny Hit n Run Paulene]

You’re right. That is just what we do here, amirite?

[Longtorso, Johnny]

Damn, and here I thought my life’s work was an epic.

[straffinrun]

A Farewell to Arms by Crusty Juggler. Hope you got some prehensile appendages.

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

Foreword by Aaron Ralston and Bethany Hamilton.

[AlmightyJB]

They’re not late Elizabeth. Ignore the link addicts. Whatever time they get here is fine.

[Swiss Servator]

TOADY!!!!!!

[DJF]

Yeah, you post this after you have gotten your link fix.

[AlmightyJB]

I haven’t even looked at them yet. Brewing coffee to have with my heroin, cigarette, and everclear while I read them.

[Fruit Sushi 2 Go]

Amateur… My day doesn’t begin until I’ve strangled a hooker.

[jarflax]

Pfft, dilletantes all of you, I have my orphans strangle my hookers with a garotte made of monocle lanyards

[bacon-magic]

You’re horning in on my hooker strangling routine. PISTOLS at dawn! *picks up water pistol and goes pew pew

[Lachowsky]

my daddy taught me when I was naught but a wee lad that there’s no reason to kill hooker because they are already dead on the inside.

[This Machine]

Boooo! You pro-editor stooge!

[CatoTheChipper]

Well, they have to arrive before noon to be AM links … but, yeah.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Suck up

[Crusty Juggler]

*sigh*

There is an established term for people like JB: Brown-noser.

Disgusting.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

This is not how negging is done.

[Brett L]

If they couldn’t get the Brits to talk French in 1066, what hope have the French today?

The European Union’s lead Brexit negotiator wants British and EU officials to work in French rather than English during the divorce talks, an EU official familiar with Brussels’ Brexit task force said on Friday.

“How do you say in French? ‘Non.'”

[Tonio]

“No, fuck you.”

or

“What talks? Buh-bye, Felicia.”

[Brett L]

“No not French, German. Do you speak German? No? You’re welcome.”

[BearOdinson]

Is it horrible that I think everyone on the Continent should be speaking German? What if I clarify that is because they should have won World War I. Not the Nazis, they fucked up being German for a LOOOONNG time.

[Swiss Servator]

*shakes fist at Bear*

/Belgian

[Tonio]

Do you speak German? No? You’re welcome.

Good one, Brett. I use that, too. Also, Russian. Pisses the fuck out of eurotrash.

[robc]

Agree to it, then speak english the entire time, only with an outrageous french accent.

[Brett L]

Bring in any living Monty Python members as “official translators” to do Quest for the Holy Grail French.

[Swiss Servator]

“I think he said they’ve already got one?!”

[Brett L]

“My hovercraft is full of eels”

/mixing streams

[Roger the Shrubber]

‘I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!’

[Tonio]

animal food trough wiper

I could never understand that. Thanks.

[Rhywun]

It’s cute that France thinks it’s going to lord over the EU going forward.

[Juice]

Um, but they DID get Brits to speak French for a couple hundred years. How do you think the English language changed so much during that period?

[Isaac Bartram]

IIANM, French was the language of the Court until Tudor times.

I believe that Elizabeth I was the first monarch to speak Modern English in her court. Of course by that time England had lost all of her French territories.

[Isaac Bartram]

Actually, the upper class in England spoke French for several hundred years after 1066.

[Isaac Bartram]

Oops, Juice beat me to it. I didn’t scroll down far enough.

[Isaac Bartram]

Although the fact that Anglo-Saxon dominated in the hybrid that resulted from mixing the languages of the various conquerors say a lot about the resilience of the Anglo-Saxons I think.

[Mickey Rat]

Bastard Normans. Norman bastards!

[Isaac Bartram]

Bastard is one of the words that made it into the language from Norman French.

I can’t be bothered to find a good Anglo-Saxon word to use. I’m not sure if that’s because Anglo-Saxons were not quite as obsessed with the marital status of your parents or not.

[Fist of Etiquette]

…for paying a sex worker to sleep with him and tipping her off about raids.

One would think the tip-offs would be enough to pay for the half and halfs. Bad negotiator.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

It said ‘sleep’. That is extra. GFE.

And nobody likes a cuddler.

[Citizen X]

(Also to blame for the late links this morning!)

Goddamn Russkies trying to influence the election!

[The Late P Brooks]

There was a fancy dinner last night where Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were seated nearby each other and for some reason everyone got excited about it

Monkeys in formal wear, wielding bladed weapons?

[Swiss Servator]

That would have been moar fun.

[SimonD]

make sure the weapons were poisoned. That would offer a better chance of the two of them killing each other.

[Fist of Etiquette]

He “did not specifically name Russia, whose war planes have carried out weeks of air strikes on the rebel-held part of Aleppo along with the Syrian air force, but his reference was clear,” Reuters reported.

If you have to infer then he’s not real serious about it.

[Swiss Servator]

“And how many divisions has Zeid Ra’ad al Hussein?”

[Crusty Juggler]

Former Fox and CBS anchor has a new job as a gay porn star and says there’s much less pressure in his current line of work

He was nominated for two regional Emmys and became known for his calm and authoritative delivery of the news.

But after 23 years he left that all behind him to embark on a completely different career – reinventing himself as Dallas Steele, a gay porn actor with dozens of blue movies to his name.

The 44-year-old said he turned his back on the news networks because of the immense pressure to get ratings.

He has had implants in his backside, which he said were paid for by an escort client, and says he has no regrets.

In an interview, he said: ‘I’m much more successful in every measure than I ever was before.’

Did John Podesta order you to participate in a blackout of this story too, Reason?

[Crusty Juggler]

The move has, however, made him a target for internet trolls.

He told reporters he ‘feels bad’ for those who criticize him – and those who branded the change in career a ‘midlife crisis’ – stating: ‘They’ve obviously decided at some point that there are limitations about who you can be and what you can do once you hit 40.

‘I’m sorry if the haters have decided that gays over 40 are supposed to put on the board shorts, move to the suburbs and settle down to bridge parties once per week. I don’t plan to ever go quietly into the night.’

Skankhunter42 is everywhere!

[DJF]

“””I don’t plan to ever go quietly into the night.'”””

Unless he has a ball gag in his mouth.

[Florida Hipster]

I think the mid life crisis may be bullshit. Most men can’t afford a hot wife and sports car until their forty, it’s not a crisis it just takes time to accumulate wealth.

[Tonio]

^This.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Question for our gay brethren…

44-year-old? Seems long in the tooth for a career.

Would this be considered DILF porn, and is that a thing?

[Rhywun]

Would this be considered DILF porn, and is that a thing?

Everything is a thing, you know that.

But no, in this case I doubt it. Older guys buy porn too. Or so I’ve heard.

[Tonio]

Depends on the gay guy. It is a disadvantage in the gay community as a whole, but there is a small contingent who like “daddies” (any guy over 35). The bear community is much more accepting of older guys than is the greater gay community, but they are more focused on beards, bellies and body hair.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

Another question: is Milo really gay or playacting an elaborate ruse to advance his alt-right agenda?

[bacon-magic]

Ask Robby Soave.

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

At least he’s doing something respectable now.

[This Machine]

Ha! Nice.

[westernsloper]

Ha ha

[Swiss Servator]

*prolonged applause*

[Fruit Sushi 2 Go]

in every measure

*snorts and giggles uncontrollably*

[Certified Public Asshat]

Much less pressure now?

He has had implants in his backside

And then he gets, uh, more pressure applied to his backside while filming.

[The Late P Brooks]

(Also to blame for the late links this morning!)

If it’s not on the twitterz, it’s not bona fide news.

[Lee Genes]

I thing i found your problem(s).

As a queer woman of color, talking about racism and sexism with my partner, who is a white man, is still difficult.

My emotions ? my anger and frustration over issues of racism ? are rational.

[Juvenile Bluster]

Linking to Everyday Feminism makes you worse than Hitler, Stalin, and George W Bush combined.

[Lee Genes]

Somebody’s got to balance out Johnny and his Roosh links.

[This Machine]

Y’know, I can appreciate the kind of person it takes to read it regularly and not drive themselves insane. They bring us back the choiciest bits of derp so we don’t have to go derp-hunting ourselves. Like King Crab fishing, only for progderp.

[Rhywun]

Literally!

[Longtorso, Johnny]

“As a queer woman of color, talking about racism and sexism with my partner, who is a white man, is still difficult.”

Then break up with him and stop subjecting him to your idiocy. Damn beta cuck can’t even break up with this level of crazy (don’t care about her race, I’m reacting to her words)? Shit.

[Krabappel]

Why does a queer woman of color have a male partner? I don’t understand.

[$park? is totally a Swifty]

That’s exactly why.

[SugarFree]

Queer no long means homosexual. It now means nothing but “I’m a special snowflake, watch how I sparkle.”

[Lee Genes]

Something tells me the Queer Nation would like to say something about that.

[A frilly pink thing]

“Queer no long means homosexual.”

Nah, that’s still what it means.

[Tonio]

She could be bisexual. Or gender-queer – no, I’m not sure what this actually means but I think it means acting like the opposite sex without changing pronouns or anything.

[SugarFree]

Yes, problematizing your gender presentation.

[Rhywun]

Stop that.

[MikeT1986]

Genderqueer as I understand it being a millennial from the coast, translates to: I don’t feel like I fit into one of the gender boxes, or I’m fluid.

The perspective usually comes from having overly strict definitions of gender roles

[Suthenboy]

I am convinced that that website is a parody.

[Tonio]

Oh, it is. Just not deliberately so.

[R C Dean]

I’m still trying to figure out the male partner of a queen woman thing. Business partner?

[Brett L]

Why are you bringing Bill Clinton into this?

[Tonio]

While I hate to use the term [scowls at Longtorso], he’s a beta male.

[AlexInCT]

You saying she uses a strap-on?

[Brett L]

“Alas, poor Yorick”

police in Sacramento, California launched a death investigation after spotting a woman walking down the sidewalk with a skull perched on a stick.

[straffinrun]

I tried a Hamlet joke here yesterday. It died in the end.

[SugarFree]

Get thee to a nunnery, straffinrun
Why wouldst thou be a breeder of sinners?

[straffinrun]

I can take your slings and arrows.

[SugarFree]

I myself am indifferent, honest.

[Longtorso, Johnny]

Hamlet II

Rock me, Sexy Jesus.

[Johnny Hit n Run Paulene]

To joke or not to joke, that is the question.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Spoiler alerteth.

[Lee Genes]

The best non sequitur you’re going to read today.

Yet, as I read about taco trucks in the news again, I realize that the misogyny underlying Gutierrez’ comments has been entirely ignored. The fear of Mexican culture and “taco trucks on every corner” is, of course, a fear of Mexican women as both laborers and mothers.

[Brett L]

Huh. That’s weird. Usually taco trucks I’ve been to tend to be a family affair, with an approximately even distribution of both sexes.

[Longtorso, Johnny]

Women? Taco? I get it. Nice.

[Fruit Sushi 2 Go]

Can I get the fish stuffed meat wallet taco with extra sour cream?

[Brett L]

My brother’s restaurant chain used to sell shirts that said, “Your boyfriend likes my taco/Your girlfriend likes my burrito” shirts. Sorry, the restaurant chain he works for. He is definitely NOT ownership.

[Suthenboy]

Anyone remember the show ‘Son of the Beach’? There were two lesbians that ran a taco stand on the beach.

Get it?

[straffinrun]

Loved that show.

[Tonio]

Did they serve fish tacos?

[Rufus The Monocled]

Alright. Since you all seem to know answers to everything. I get up this morning and looking out the door window I notice a dead animal at the bottom of my stairs. It looks to have a mangled head and is partially skinned. It’s weird.

My brother in law seems to think a fox or some other animal dragged and left it there. My wife, who watches one too many Criminal Minds shows, goes a little off and wonders if someone is trying to send us a message. She’s a little freaked by having our car broken into the other day.

Thoughts? Go.

[Lee Genes]

Is your wife pregnant? If so, you should probably name the kid Damien.

[Atanarjuat]

Win.

[Brett L]

Do you have cats? Because they usually are plotting to kill you.

[Johnny Hit n Run Paulene]

Sounds like a cat kill to me too, I’m gonna guess it’s a bunny.

[DJF]

Do have a cat, they like to bring people presents.

[straffinrun]

Those little presents we get from a little pussy.

[$park? is totally a Swifty]

They aren’t gifts, they’re lessons.

Lesson 1: this is how you kill things
Lesson 2: this is what I can do and I’m active while you’re sleeping

[thom]

It’s worse when they hide them away. Found a mouse lovingly nestled in a basket of diapers yesterday.

[Enough About Palin]

Best. Euphemism. Ever!

[Juvenile Bluster]

It’s Florida’s first shot in the Quebec-Florida war. The Quebecois are invading here again. We have to fight back, but in the Florida way.

[Florida Hipster]

Catfish in the mail box is how I like to send a message.

[Brett L]

Live saltwater cats. Especially with folks who don’t know how bad that spine can hurt.

[Florida Hipster]

I caught a spine in the web of my hand fishing in New Smyrna. My hand burned for the remainder of the evening. Now I own a Kevlar glove.

[Suthenboy]

Not week-old possum roadkill? You need to up your game.

[Brett L]

How many Cajuns does it take to eat a possum?

Two. One to work the fork and knife, the other to direct traffic.

[Atanarjuat]

I assume it’s not the young hotties that are invading, but rather the elderly?

[Juvenile Bluster]

Of course it’s the elderly.

I always know it’s coming because that manufactured home community I pass on my way to work puts up their Canadian flag.

[Rufus The Monocled]

I hate when they do that. Like anyone cares.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

Flood their streets with meth?

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Why do you think they come to Florida?

[SugarFree]

So you are bitching about free meat?

[Rufus The Monocled]

/puts head down.

Why do I bother?

[straffinrun]

I refrained from making a Gosnell joke, so there’s that.

[SugarFree]

Given that it wasn’t nailed anywhere, I doubt it was a threat. Something was probably just having a meal and was scared off from it.

[But Enough About Me]

Why do I bother?

You’re asking that of this crowd?

And here I thought you were one of the Elder Commentariat.

[Suthenboy]

A dead animal? A mouse or a moose? This is important information.

[Florida Hipster]

First make sure it’s dead.

Rufus: bang bang. Ok what’s next?

[Rufus The Monocled]

Looks like a hare.

And why would they be eating on my pathway?

[Florida Hipster]

Why is your pathway on their eating grounds?

[Atanarjuat]

I found the head and tail of a squirrel under my olive tree yesterday.

Oddly enough, my first thought was similar to yours, “I wonder if it’s the ex-husband of that chick I’ve been banging…”

[The Other Kevin]

Sounds like the work of a chupacabra.

[RBS]

That’s what I came here to say.

[spqr2008]

It can’t possibly smell as bad as the vol my aunt’s cat dragged in and hid behind the hutch one Thanksgiving. So, being 16, I immediately turn to the cat and say, “Thank you Truffles, for the wonderful smell you have discovered.”

[Brett L]

Had a cat whose favorite place to eat his favorite food (baby squirrels) was directly under my bed. Usually at 2am. I would hear the crunching of the brain case. And god forbid I stayed out somewhere and didn’t realize there was the back half of a squirrel under my bed until the smell started. I miss the little fucker. He took off when my now wife moved in. I guess I broke the roommate agreement by moving a girl in full time.

[tarran]

Are you sure he took off?

When I had to deal harshly with some squirrels that decided to attempt adverse possession of my house, I told my future wife I was relocating them… to a new homeland in the East. She didn’t get the reference until much, much later.

Your girlfriend might have dealt with the dead babt squirrel problem with similar ruthlessness.

[Brett L]

I prefer to think that he found some nice old lady who hand feeds him tuna and keeps a stable of female cats for him to fight and fuck.

[Raven Nation]

Lisa: “Your hamster didn’t move to a farm upstate. He died and dad buried him in the backyard – although not necessarily in that order.”

[EDG reppin LBC]

Fox or coyote, maybe? The auto break-in and this are unrelated. Nobody “sends messages to people”. If they want to send a message they just walk up to you and punch you in the face.

[Tonio]

I suspect a non-sinister motive, like fox, coyote, etc. More info (species, particularly) would help.

Also, are the cuts/tears clean and straight (like a knife), or consistent with tearing (as from teeth)?

It is possible that the critter which killed the critter was frightened off (or carried off) by another creature such as an owl.

[Tonio]

I saw a really cool photo on the interwebs the other day of a set of rabbit tracks in the snow, ending abruptly with wing-prints in the snow. Not sure if shopped, but totally cool anyway.

[Swiss Servator]

Probably not shopped – this happens in my back yard, annually.

[EDG reppin LBC]

I was walking to the liquor store one evening and I had the thrill of watching an owl fly inches over my shoulder and snatch a rat out of a bush. It was all right at eye level and literally two feet away. Big owl. Giant talons. Flew over my shoulder into the hedge, wrestled for a few seconds and emerged with a big ol’ rat in its grasp. I’ve been a fan of raptors ever since. They are awesome.

[Chipwooder]

Owls will eat pretty much anything, too, including cats and small dogs.

[bacon-magic]

Cytotoxic and Trudeau sending you a message. Send them a horse head.

[Suthenboy]

“The United Nations human-rights head called recent air strikes against Aleppo war crimes.”

UN human rights head. The first thing that occurred to me is that he is probably a guy with a bone in his nose and a mountain of skulls behind his hut. Maybe sporting a necklace made of human teeth.

*checks*

I was wrong. He is only two generations removed from that.

[AlmightyJB]

“The United Nations human-rights head called recent air strikes against Aleppo war crimes.”

And nothing else happened

[The Other Kevin]

So apparently Authorize.net accidentally re-ran a lot of charges, so people were seeing double charges on their credit card statements with the charges dated about a month apart. Sounds like this is wide spread and could potentially cause quite the shit storm. Someone I know called Authorize.net and got a recording stating the double charges will all be reversed.

[Tonio]

Will they also take care of any fees, penalties and over-limits this causes? Proactively contact the credit bureaus, etc?

[SugarFree]

Robby’s biggest fan once again dips her gnarled toe into the Rolling Stone libel.

[Lee Genes]

In her testimony, Erdely said she erred in relying on “Jackie,” the student who claimed to have been gang-raped at a campus fraternity: “It was a mistake to rely on someone whose intent was to deceive me.”

Obviously she never thought that someone would lie to a trained journalist.

[Suthenboy]

Also, women never lie about rape. She was working on that assumption. No doubt she learned that in her gender studies classes at Columbia.

[Tonio]

It was a mistake to rely on someone whose intent was to deceive me.

LOL. This is just as egregious as when the cops say “the pistol discharged.” She didn’t do any due diligence.

Damn, I would love to see Erdely squirming on the witness stand. That alone makes the suit worthwhile, to send a message to journalists that they need to do their fucking jobs or find another line of work.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

It was a mistake to rely on someone whose intent was to deceive me.

Coincidently, this will be the editor’s defense when discussing Erdley.

[Tonio]

Seeing her hung out to dry is just icing on the cake. Of course we all know she’s going to turn around and try to play the victim card. She is a truly loathsome human being.

[Mickey Rat]

Journalusts are trained to be absolutely trusting of their single sources, tbere was nothing Erdely coukd do.

[Crusty Juggler]

This comment, and this mindset:

felt the bern
Flow Bee
10/20/16 4:26pm

I disagree. This story was an enormous setback and now rape culture is en vogue yet again thanks to Trump. Rape accusers should always be believed until it is proven not true.

Yet another reason we have to get our girl in the Oval Office.

It’s so stupid.

[PBR Streetgang]

“Rape accusers should always be believed until it is proven not true.”
Wonder what her opinion is on Juanita Broaddrick.

[Krabappel]

I’m guessing she thinks all of Bill Clinton’s victims have been proven liars. Convenient.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

I wouldn’t be surprised if she copped to that. What they’re attempting to establish is guilt by public opprobrium, and since the public narrative is shaped by progressive outlets, Bill has been found innocent.

[Atanarjuat]

“Rape culture”…

In other news, I’m taking my son to his first rape later today. Wish me luck!

[Crusty Juggler]

Pics? Thanks.

[RBS]

Me too. My wife tells me there will be s’mores. And fireworks!

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Oh, congratulations! I remember the first rape my dad took me to. Fond memories.

[straffinrun]

His second, right? He was there at his conception.

[EDG reppin LBC]

Third. He grabbed the pussy during birth.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Yeah, Hillary would never say anything bad about a sexual assault victim.

[Juvenile Bluster]

Apparently that’s a troll, per other comments.

No doubt there are plenty of people on Jezebel that feel identical to the way tthat xe thinks though.

[Crusty Juggler]

I should not be so easily duped, however the “Donald Trump rape culture” whine is a complaint I have seen and heard before, and it is too stupid to be ignored.

[SugarFree]

What Don Giovanni, an Opera About a Charismatic Rapist, Can Teach Us About Don Trump

Bonnie Gordon is an associate professor of music at the University of Virginia, where she teaches a class on music and gender.

[Lee Genes]

The higher ed bubble can’t pop soon enough.

[Chipwooder]

Bonnie Gordon is a stain on UVA. She was the shrillest faculty witch hunter during the Rolling Stone fiasco as well as the idiot who tried to use Title IX to get a mural changed in Old Cabell Hall.

[Tonio]

Yet another reason we have to get our girl in the Oval Office.

LULZ. Also, wasn’t a Flo-Bee a home haircutting appliance that hooked to a vacuum cleaner?

[EDG reppin LBC]

It sucks while it cuts.

[The Late P Brooks]

looking out the door window I notice a dead animal at the bottom of my stairs. It looks to have a mangled head and is partially skinned. It’s weird.

WHAT MANNER OF BEAST?

Fucking Hell. Canadians….

[AlmightyJB]

What did you do last night? Do you even remember?

[$park? is totally a Swifty]

You can’t expect Rufus to go near something yucky.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Elizabeth Nolan Brown|Oct. 21, 2016 9:15 am

:: shakes head::

I expect this sort of thing from Robby, but not you, ENB.

[AlmightyJB]

“A U.S. District Court yesterday blocked Mississippi’s law banning medical providers that offers abortions from receiving any state Medicaid money”

Is this not a 10th Amendment violation?

[westernsloper]

I thought we tore the 10th up awhile ago

[Juvenile Bluster]

Interstate commerce. That magical word that somehow invalidated the 10th amendment.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

A U.S. District Court yesterday blocked Mississippi’s law banning medical providers that offers abortions from receiving any state Medicaid money, in a case brought by Planned Parenthood clinics.

Not giving is denying access

[The Late P Brooks]

This story was an enormous setback and now rape culture is en vogue yet again thanks to Trump. Rape accusers should always be believed until it is proven not true.

I’m pretty sure that’s how it played out.

Unbelievable story is unbelievable.

[Suthenboy]

That story was a setback. Just that one. Not mattress girl, or the other dozens of false flags that are so numerous I cant remember them all. Just that story.

[SugarFree]

All y’all just fuck off. You think Lizzie just rolls out of bed looking perfect? You want her posting links without getting all pretty for us? This is sexism.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

Practicing negging?

[Brett L]

It appears that ENB has called in her colleagues at The Atlantic to help with her exuse.

Update 9:45 a.m. ET: Dyn, a large domain name service company, reports that it was attacked by a distributed denial-of-service attack around 7 a.m. ET, shutting down access to a number of popular internet sites. As of 9:20 a.m. ET, it had restored service to normal.

[SugarFree]

popular internet sites

What does this have to do with Hit & Run?

[Tonio]

[golf clap]

[Sevo]

Envy. Excuses. Not much.

[straffinrun]

Volunteered at a special needs school today. Noticed a new kid in my extremely low IQ class. I walked up to him and said very slowly, “I am straffinrun (insert real name)” as I pointed at my nose. “What is your name?”. I’m Tanaka Yuki. Nice to meet you. BTW, I’m a volunteer, too.”

[tarran]

Ha!

[Rhywun]

I was in a joint German Club/Japanese Club meeting once. I turned to the Japanese kid next to me and asked him something about Japanese. He said, “I’m in the German Club”.

Peinlich!

[straffinrun]

Oh, and in case you missed it and want to see Donna Brasile acting even more ridiculous than usual…
Watch this.

[arbitrary wavefunction]

STOP PERSECUTING HER SHES A CHRISTIAN WOMAN

[straffinrun]

Kudos to TYT for showing this. I know it’s only because they’re pissed that Bernie got the shaft, but I’ll take it. If they really wanted to take it to its conclusion, they would find a way to ask Hillary, “You must’ve known about this since you obviously prepared for exactly this question. Or do you not listen to Donna at all?”

[Sevo]

Obama compares O-care to a smart phone; Samsung sues for liable:

“Obama Says Affordable Care Act Needs Reform Not Repeal”
[…]
“When one of these companies comes out with a new smartphone, and it has a few bugs. What do they do? They fix it…”
http://www.theindychannel.com/…..not-repeal

He ignores that smart phones were an improvement.

[John DeWitt]

Pretty sure they haven’t found a patch for the exploding Note 7’s yet…

[The Late P Brooks]

I’m still trying to figure out the male partner of a quee[r] woman thing. Business partner?

This bastardization of the language really pisses me off. Once upon a time, one did not have to stop and say, “Partner… would that be a business associate, or homosexual lover?”

It’s not just pointlessly confusing, it’s a blatant assault on language.

[Rhywun]

And we haven’t got into what pronouns xe uses.

[Rhywun]

haven’t *even*

[Ken Shultz]

Reactions to Duterte’s recent statements on separating from the U.S. and favoring a new alliance with China are overblown.

Four reasons:

1) We’ve been kicked out of the Philippines before.

That all changed after 9/11. They asked us to come back and help them fight Islamist militants.

2) We’re wildly popular with the Filipino people.

According to this Pew survey, we’re seen as favorable by 92% of Filipinos.

http://www.pewglobal.org/2015/…..bal-image/

America might be more popular with Filipinos than we are with Americans!

3) Duterte pitting the United States and China against each other is absurd. We still represent almost as much of a market for China’s manufactured goods as the entire European Union, and China still holds a tremendous amount of our debt. China making war against the United States would be economic and political suicide for China.

4) The Philippines biggest external threat remains China, and the United States remains the Philippines best check against that threat.

[Ken Shultz]

Both reports and circumstances suggest that the Chinese may have given Duterte some kind of concession, guarantee, or agreement in the South China Sea. If that’s the case, this is probably a good thing for China, the Philippines, the United States, and the world.

We want peace in the South China Sea. If China is sharing the South China Sea like Royal Dutch Shell shares North Sea oil between the UK and the Netherlands, that’s a capitalist solution. If they get along like Norway and the UK sharing oil between them, that’ll be great. Hopefully, whatever ventures emerge from that are listed on the NYSE. The more China ties itself to the rest of the world through markets and capitalism, the better it will be for the world’s peace and prosperity.

Duterte’s comments may have been required by the Chinese and mostly intended for public consumption in China.

[Swiss Servator]

Or it may be that he is just bat-shite insane or a a leader in the Chavismo mold.

[Ken Shultz]

He’s a strong man type, but this is about oil for the Phillipines.

“China and the Philippines could begin exploiting long-untapped energy reserves in the South China Sea, according to reports coming out of this week’s meeting between Filipino President Rodrigo Duterte and high-ranking Chinese officials ? including a Thursday sit-down with Chinese President Xi Jinping ? in Beijing. How soon that may happen remains unclear, however, as Duterte cautioned reporters that he has not been empowered by his Congress to finalize any energy exploration deal with his Chinese counterparts.

Earlier reports by Philippine newspaper the “Inquirer” suggested that Beijing and Duterte were set to enter into an agreement to explore for energy sources in a part of the South China Sea close to the Philippine coastline. China has long sought to exploit what it believes could be more than 100 billion barrels of oil and hundreds of trillions of cubic feet of natural gas lurking beneath the South China Sea. However, a litany of overlapping territorial claims in the region by the more than half-dozen nations rimming the South China Sea has rendered broad energy development there a nonstarter.”

http://www.cnbc.com/2016/10/21…..a-sea.html

[Ken Shultz]

These are not the actions of a stupid man.

Although a lot of progressives can’t tell the difference between Trump’s words and sexual assault, words are just words. They’re not actions.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

Speaking of clowns, American student blown up after dressing as a clown to spook Cambodian villagers. He fled into the jungle after being chased and trod on a landmine.

[Johnny Hit n Run Paulene]

Bet he won’t do that again!

[Scott Foval, Jr.]

Yet another clown story.

She said two men dressed as clowns then came out of a maroon Dodge Caravan and reportedly dragged her out of her car.

The woman said the clowns then assaulted her, put out a lit cigarette on her cheek and wrote “clown posse” on her face.

This country needs a national conversation about common-sense clown control.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

“Clowning around” is going to have very upsetting connotations.

[Jerryskids]

“I’ll take ‘Things That Never Happened’ for $500, Alex”, on the other hand, will still have the same connotation it’s always had.

[Swiss Servator]

WHAT IF IT WAS JUGGALOS!!?!??!?!

[Enough About Palin]

No one needs two clowns.

[Kurmudgeonly Kristen]

Two phone interviews in 2 days. Introverts’ nightmare. I can’t handle this level of adrenaline.

I hope someone offers me a job soon.

[Johnny Hit n Run Paulene]

Good luck to you! Keep breathing.

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

Good luck. And amen. Between getting punched in the ‘nads and a fifteen minute interview I’ll take the punch.

[This Machine]

Knock ’em dead, killer! As Johnny mentions, don’t forget to breathe.

[Kurmudgeonly Kristen]

So I just had a phone screen with a company that does marketing and web dev for nonprofits. The person I talked to had the EXACT verbal affect I was expecting. Why is it that so many people in the nonprofit arena sound sad and defeated? (I’ve worked in several nonprofits – this would not be my first rodeo. It’s just a pervasive culture of droopiness all around.)

[Jerryskids]

The charges, spurred by activity that recently occured, are unrelated to the other prostitution scandal gripping the Oakland Police Department.

I don’t think they’re totally unrelated – the connection would be the “culture of corruption”, AKA life in a post-rule-of-law society. The plebes are starting to catch on that rules are only for some people and rules that apply only to some people are not rules you have any obligation to respect or obey. Hence, police officers that feel free to do as they please and expect no consequences. And Donald Trump.

I’m supposed to be shocked and appalled and outraged by the actions of by some loud-mouthed fat-headed retarded-clown swindler enough to consider him unfit to be President – but I am not supposed to be shocked and appalled and outraged that the people who are telling me I’m supposed to be shocked and appalled and outraged are themselves supporting a lying sack of shit treasonous would-be Stalinist criminal who’s been getting away with worse than that all her life? Fuck you – if you don’t have to follow any basic rules of honesty and fairness and decency then don’t be surprised when everybody else agrees with you that the rules don’t matter any more.

[John DeWitt]

So there’s an Amendment here in Georgia where the state can step in and take over failing local school districts. Don’t really know anything about, but saw that the national and local teacher’s unions are all against it.

The amendment seems too vague for my liking, but is it wrong to vote for it just to piss of the unions?

[commodious cam't contmpla..]

They’d happily piss on you, so it’s better to piss them off.

[Raven Nation]

Ask the ratepayers in Kansas City, Missouri.

[Jerryskids]

It’s one of those half-a-loaf things – it’s an improvement over what the teachers want, which is to just keep pumping more money into failing schools over and over and over, but what Deal’s proposing is a state-wide special school district with some new state bureaucracy in control and I have my doubts that the state bureaucracy is any better than the local bureaucracy. But, this is sort of a showdown between the governor and the teacher’s unions over who runs the educational system and you gotta stand with the governor because you know what the results are when you let the educrat lunatics run the asylum. Just look at Atlanta with that “amazing turn-around artist” superintendent Beverly Hall and what happened – remember how at the beginning there were some 150 teachers and 50+ schools being investigated and by the time everything got swept under the rug several years later, how many teachers actually got fired and how many schools actually got into trouble?

[John DeWitt]

Ugh…like everything in this election, there’s no good choice.