Trump Maybe Planning Television Return, Clinton's Email Scandal Gets Even More Complicated, Clown Panic Grows: P.M. Links

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  • Clowns
    Matthias Oesterle/ZUMA Press/Newscom

    Maybe the entire election is just a preview for Donald Trump's television network? Whatever helps keep us sane. Meanwhile, posturing over whether the GOP will respect election results after Trump called the race "rigged."

  • The latest FBI vs. Clinton email scandal is probably not what people think. It seemed at first as though the Department of State sought to have emails declassified in order to make it appear they weren't holding classified messages on private servers, but based on the FBI's response, these emails were retroactively classified in response to a Freedom of Information Act requests. The FBI also denies any "quid pro quo" offers about the two agencies working together to allow more FBI agents to work overseas.
  • Target is suspending the sales of clown masks for Halloween because of pointless stupid panic.
  • The man convicted of shooting at George Zimmerman in a road rage incident in Florida has been sentenced to 20 years in prison.
  • The FBI is trying to get a federal judge to dismiss a lawsuit against them over Dylann Roof's deadly Charleston, South Carolina, shooting rampage. Roof should have been denied a gun purchase based on his criminal background, but the FBI didn't catch it.
  • FBI Director James Comey says they don't really know if there's an epidemic of police shootings of black men because of the lack of collected data.

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  1. Target is suspending the sales of clown masks for Halloween because of pointless stupid panic.

    THE TARGET LOGO SCARES ME, TOO.

    1. Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezo. You are a hated time traveler.

      1. No one hates a time traveler. They all make sure of it.

        1. Unless they want to be hated…

          Hmmm

      2. Hey, guess what, bacon? Eugene just went back in time and fucked your grandma. That’s right, FIST IS YOUR POP-POP.

        1. He probably boned the first Homo Sapiens wyman. He’s your dadda too. Take that Tulpa!

          1. Ronald Reagan boned Wyman first.

              1. Bedtime for Bonzo!

            1. Actually, Myron Martin Futterman did, according to Wikipedia (Reagan was Wyman’s second husband).

              1. WTF are all of you talking about?

            2. I never knew that he was a Rolling Stones’ groupie.

      3. I think reason must give him advanced notice of the Linx and allows to make a comment before they post it. It’s the only explanation that makes sense.

        1. There you go again ….

          1. Goin’ down the only road he’s ever known?

            1. Like a drifter libertarian he was born to walk the road alone?

              1. Crying in the rain?

              2. Like a libertarian he was born to walk the road his property alone?

                1. With a 30.06.

              3. Like a drifter libertarian he was born to walk the road alone?

                Only if it’s a private orad.

                1. road, god dammit.

        2. Alternate explanations: He is closer (in network topology) to the H&R server than anyone else, so sees the posts before anyone else. He is an insider, like an H&R staffer.

          1. Fist of Etiquette is Robby Soave’s hair?!? You heard it here first, folks.

            1. The Reason server is in FoE’s bathroom?

              1. Dagnabbit! That was supposed to be a comment on Tonio’s post.

            2. Might be Gillespie’s jacket. I’ve noticed that he is occasionally without jacket, which is really confusing. Apparently they can both survive short stints away from one another.

              The jacket’s got opinions, man. It’s time that leather goods stood up for themselves.

          2. “He is an insider, like an H&R staffer.”

            *squints and scratches chin*

          3. Fist? Insider? Damn near off kilter.

            1. *narrows gaze* (since Swiss is unavailable at the moment)

        3. Honestly who cares.

          The reality is much more pathetic, he hammers refresh constantly until it pops up.

          EVERY DAY

          That’s not cool, or impressive, it is a fucking loser having so little going on in his life that he has time to make daily appointments to smash his refresh key and post something stupid.

          There’s nothing to be proud of there.

          1. ^Tulpa, cry baby version.

            1. Aww did I tell too much truth for you bitch?

              You gonna cry more bitch?

              Hey, get fist to smash refresh and post your crying first so everyone can still ignore it.

              Bitch.

            2. “People still care about first posts? When did I get transported to 1997?”

              1. It appears that you do.

                1. Hmm, I guess you’re one of those idiots who goes on the internet and reply to someone who says no one cares about something by intimating that the person who posted cares about something which never made any sense to me because it’s stupid and nonsensical but you’re stupid and nonsensical so I suppose that actually does make a little bit of sense

                2. “OneOut|10.17.16 @ 6:32PM|#

                  It appears that you do.”

                  And it appears that you’re too stupid to read for comprehension.

                  Do that thing again where cunts like you say people who don’t care about things do care about things, because? fuck I don’t know, I’m not the result of parents who are related three different ways so it doesn’t make sense to me.

              2. Bitch, shut your yap box

                1. Or what kind You’re Nobody you can’t do a fucking thing to me except I like a fucking bitch in fact that your Mo cry like a fucking bitch you wake up everyday starting the day crying like a fucking bitch then you go after people who you can’t do anything too and tell them to do things that you can’t actually make them do because your a fucking bitch and then when they challenge you to do something about it all you do is continue to pose like a fucking bitch

                  1. You gonna fucking cry CRYmore?

                    You gonna tell me to do things while havong exactly no power to enforce anything?

                    Poor baby, can’t do shit and knows it so he decides to crymore.

                    1. Wow, he’s right, CRYmore can’t do shit.

                      But cry that is.

                    2. Hey CRYmore, beg me to stop like you begged me to stop using your name. If the only movie have backing you can’t make me do anything

              3. Ten pentaflops ago.

          2. Who on earth has to keep hitting refresh? The Links are posted at the same time every day. (Unless you-know-who is up.)

    2. Hello.

      PM Links: FBI Edition.

    3. Idiots. They should have a special clown mask section. Have we forgotten the point of Halloween?

      1. Clown masks are going to be the Halloween rage.

        It’s a marketing gimmick!

      2. Bathrooms for people who self identify as clowns

      3. Halloween’s been pussified since at least the eighties.

        1. People get pissed off when people soap their windows or “toilet paper’ their trees. Who knew?

  2. The man convicted of shooting at George Zimmerman in a road rage incident in Florida has been sentenced to 20 years in prison.

    Where he will stand his ground in accordance with the law.

    1. BTW, this is a true silver medal since it landed on 4:31. I have often posted at 4:30 along with Fist, but the server has been hacked by Russia in his favor. Goddamn Ruskies.

      1. Definitely Putin and his crummy little today, Trump.

        1. toady, damnit!

          1. Crummy Little Today remains an underrated album, 22 years later.

            1. It’s Dinosaur Jr. Jr’s best work.

          2. If that means psychoactive cane toad licking, I’m all in.

        2. Putin (the server) on the fritz!

      2. Sure, Junior, if that what gets you through your day.

        1. I just thought we were blaming Russia for everything, and this was my best chance to take down FoE. We can’t have four more years of Eugene posting first all the time!

  3. The man convicted of shooting at George Zimmerman in a road rage incident in Florida has been sentenced to 20 years in prison.

    Zimmerman/Guy Who Shot at Zimmerman for President 2020

    1. “America Could Do, And Has Done, Worse”

    2. That guy sure does seem to make the news a lot.

      1. It’s just his 15 hours of fame.

      2. I think it’s one part Zimmerman-is-an-idiot, one other part the-media-wants-to-cover-him.

        1. There sure does seem to be a lot of people who want to kill that guy… jus sayin

          1. It does not help GZ that he is a retarded asshole. For realz.

          2. A lot of people just want to kill someone/ anybody/ their boss. He’s as good of a target as anyone else.

    3. “You’re going to like the way you vote! I guarantee it!”

      /official Zimmerman 2020 slogan

  4. It seemed at first as though the Department of State sought to have emails declassified in order to make it appear they weren’t holding classified messages on private servers, but based on the FBI’s response, these emails were retroactively classified in response to a Freedom of Information Act requests.

    Oh, FFS! Just ask Putin and be done with it!

  5. Meanwhile, posturing over whether the GOP will respect election results after Trump called the race “rigged.”

    I think it’s fair to say, the Donald and the GOP are entirely separate entities.

    1. Only when it is convenient to The Narrative.

      1. I think Nick Gillespie is a junior member of the The Narrative’s planning committee, we’ll have to wait for him to weigh in on this.

        1. ” junior member ”

          Ouch.

    2. So you’re saying if Trump loses Trump will whine and fuss and prolong the agony of the election, while if Hillary loses she’ll graciously concede to Trump and we get to forget about her?

      Sounds like a good argument to vote Trump.

      1. if Trump loses Trump will whine and fuss and prolong the agony of the election, while if Hillary loses she’ll graciously concede to Trump and we get to forget about her?

        Trump is Gore and Hillary is Bush?

    3. News Item: Nancy Pelosi demands that Mitch McConnell affirm the validity of the 2016 election or else be “complicit” in Trump’s allegations.

      I will take back everything I have said about McConnell if he responds to Pelosi by saying, “We have to have the election so that we can see what’s in it.”

    4. How can one certify an event before it happens?

      Trump should say: we will need to compare voter rolls to people who voted. The proof is on those asserting the election is fair.

    5. Trump’s correct, except he isn’t the only victim.

  6. sorry to bother…
    From: gthrush@politico.com
    To: john.podesta@gmail.com

    No worries
    Because I have become a hack I will send u the whole section that pertains to u
    Please don’t share or tell anyone I did this
    Tell me if I fucked up anything

    Smooches

    1. That reads a lot like:

      If you read this while scroling
      you have been visited by mr skeltal, etc.

      1. HM is approaching SIV levels of annoying with that shit.

          1. I am adding you to my shit list.

            1. Is it like The List of Jericho?

          2. +1 extra calcium

    2. Indiana is Politico’s Chief Political Correspondent.

      1. Jesus. Make sure you get enough iodine while you’re pregnant, ladies.

      2. We named the dog Indiana.

  7. Clinton Campaign, DNC Coordinated With Organizations To Incite Violence At Trump Events

    “I’m saying we have mentally ill people, that we pay to do shit, make no mistake,” says Foval in the video. “Over the last twenty years, I’ve paid off a few homeless guys to do some crazy stuff, and I’ve also taken them for dinner, and I’ve also made sure they had a hotel, and a shower. And I put them in a program. Like I’ve done that. But the reality is, a lot of people especially our union guys. A lot of our union guys?they’ll do whatever you want. They’re rock and roll. When I need to get something done in Arkansas, the first guy I call is the head of the AFL-CIO down there, because he will say, ‘What do you need?’ And I will say, I need a guy who will do this, this and this. And they find that guy. And that guy will be like, Hell yeah, let’s do it.”

    “It doesn’t matter what the friggin’ legal and ethics people say, we need to win this motherfucker,” Foval also said.

    1. And, of course, I fucked the link. http://www.realclearpolitics.c…..rters.html

    2. You beat me too it, but Ken Schulz’d the link.

      1. “Cunt” isn’t a verb.

        1. Cunted. Now it is.

          1. “Hillary cunted on and on until she had a sudden coughing fit”.

            Ok, you’re right.

          2. I’ve actually seen that usage as a verb, but not in that context.

            1. I think this newly discovered verb is going to be quite popular.

        2. The word “cunt” is versatile. As in the sci fi classic “Cuntickle for Leibowitz,” which describes John Stewart’s exploits before he became the host of the Daily Show.

    3. Clinton Campaign, DNC Coordinated With Organizations To Incite Violence At Trump Events

      Behold, the tolerant and peace loving proggie left…

      1. They, they’re just being intolerant of intolerant people!

      2. Yeah, when that woman with the tank top reading “Trump can grab my [downward-pointing arrow]” went viral, the left jumped all over her with fat-shaming and slut-shaming.

        1. It’s ok when they do it, Tonio.

    4. I’ve paid off a few homeless guys to do some crazy stuff

      Go on…

      and I’ve also taken them for dinner

      Oh, that seems like a lot of work…

      I’ve also made sure they had a hotel, and a shower.

      That is probably necessary…

      1. I’ve paid off a few homeless guys to do some crazy stuff

        Go on…

        and I’ve also taken them for dinner

        Oh, that seems like a lot of work…

        Shouldn’t he be arrested for solicitation?

      2. He seems to have gotten those out of order.

      3. I hope that when he hired him, he got 1 form of ID from column A or two forms of ID from Column A and from Column B (see I-9 form). Had him fill out a W9 so at the end of the year he gets a W2 and paid the homeless person min. wage plus any overtime due. Otherwise I expect the DOL to open a case against the DNC for unfair hiring practices.

    5. What’s wrong with that?

      /prog

      1. RIGHT-WINGERS DO THAT ALL THE TIME! WE’RE FIGHTING THEM AT THEIR OWN GAME!

    6. and I’ve also taken them for dinner,

      Cheeseburger Prostitution, proven!

    7. The FEC or FIB will be right on it!!

      (hahahaha!!)

  8. FBI Director James Comey says they don’t really know if there’s an epidemic of police shootings of black men because of the lack of collected data.

    I think I can say with certainty that there’s no police out there worked up about the lack of data and shooting black men because of it.

    1. Fuck that bullshit, there’s enough fucking collected data right here on Reason.

      1. The FBI, like the rest of us, skips the articles and just goes straight to the comments.

        1. But they do check out the alt-text.

  9. Target is suspending the sales of clown masks for Halloween because of pointless stupid panic.

    Hssst. The scary clown in the Target parking lot has ’em.

    1. Good.

    2. Jobless out, or gay out?

      1. Gay out, I think. Only skimmed the article. “He said that reports that Ailes had prevented him from coming out publicly several years ago were false.”

        1. Wait a minute, he’s a damn Republican! He’s not allowed to be gay!

          1. +1 log cabin

            1. Oh the euphemisms!

          2. Gays are gonna be more and more Republican from now on. The Democrats have nothing more to offer them, and most are in upper income brackets.

          3. High school was lot more fun for me after I figured out that the best places to pick up guys were the prayer meetings and Bible studies.

    3. SHEP: I’M GRATEFUL FOR THE SUPPORT I’M GETTING

    4. SHEP: I’M STILL A MAJOR-LEAGUE ASSHOLE

      1. And boring. I mean put you to sleep boring.

        1. The Fox demographic is 55+. This may be a feature, not a bug.

    5. “This is something you should think about: It’s going to be 4 degrees tonight, and your cat lives outside. You should think about this.”

      “Ah’m Shepard Smith, and ah come from a small town full of secrets.”

      1. So, time to grab the “kitty?”

      2. I had a cat who loved to go outside if there was a lot of snow and it was really cold. He would go to the door and meow until I’d let him out and he’d jump right into a big snow drift. He would stay out and come back the next morning meowing at the door to get in, covered in snow and frozen whiskers. Cats are crazy.

    6. He’s not Curly, so no.

  10. Would on the creepy clown in the middle. *tweaks lil’ red nose

  11. It seemed at first as though the Department of State sought to have emails declassified in order to make it appear they weren’t holding classified messages on private servers, but based on the FBI’s response, these emails were retroactively classified in response to a Freedom of Information Act requests.

    Either way, Hillary was breaking the law.

    1. “Breaking The Law”

      There I was completely wasting, out of work and down.
      All inside it’s so frustrating as I drift from town to town.
      Feel as though nobody cares if I live or die,
      So I might as well begin to put some action in my life.

      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.

      So much for the golden future, I can’t even start.
      I’ve had every promise broken, there’s anger in my heart.
      You don’t know what it’s like, you don’t have a clue;
      If you did, you’d find yourselves doing the same thing, too.

      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law,

      You don’t know what it’s like.

      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.
      Breaking the law, breaking the law.

      Breaking the law.

      1. Well look who decided to show up.

        1. It was a moral imperative.

          1. FL in the house!

      2. Damn your nimble fingers.

  12. ?The man convicted of shooting at George Zimmerman in a road rage incident in Florida has been sentenced to 20 years in prison.

    That’s not going to sit well with people who don’t understand how our justice system works but react emotionally to everything they see in the news.

    1. That’s not going to sit well with people who don’t understand how our justice system works but react emotionally to everything they see in the news.

      IOW, almost everyone.

    2. To be fair, the media does not help. What actually happened at Zimmerman’s trial and what the media actually reported on it are two massively different things. I remember reading some law students’ blogs where they were all confused at the general public response to the case because they actually had knowledge of the court proceedings.

    1. You Won’t BELIEVE His Wail At 3:08

    2. She was on the pots, huh? Happens all the time. And they want to legalize that stuff!

  13. Judge Asks How ALCS Will Be Played If Indians Logo Banned

    An Ontario judge hearing arguments on an attempt to bar the Cleveland Indians from using their team name and “Chief Wahoo” logo during Monday’s night playoff game in Toronto asked the plaintiff’s lawyer how the game would be played if the name and logo didn’t appear.

    The legal challenge by indigenous activist Douglas Cardinal comes on the same day the team plays the Toronto Blue Jays in Game 3 of the American League Championship Series.

    “Using a racially discriminatory caricature is a violation of the Ontario human rights code,” Jilesen told the judge.

    1. I’d like to see the cops try to prevent this.

      Fuckers.

    2. Corey Kluber is LITERALLY HITLER!!!!1!!!1!!!111!

      1. AL and the freaking Designated Hitler rule.

      2. “Corey Kluber is LITERALLY HITLER!!!!1!!!1!!!111!”

        Every inning : KKK

    3. Oh fuck off already.

    4. And he’s culturally appropriating a bird’s name!

      1. He seems to have the intelligence of a bird though.

      2. oh I get it. If the Indians can’t play, the Blue Jays win by forfeit. Very clever!

        1. If I was MLB commissioner, I’d take the opposite route:

          “Due to the province’s attempt to interfere in the championship series, we declare Cleveland the winner of the ALCS.”

          Reason #1111 why I won’t ever be MLB commissioner.

          1. The Irsays left Baltimore in moving vans in the middle of the night because the state of Maryland was trying to institute eminent domain proceedings against the Colts.

    5. Also…

      Regina activists place warning labels on Indigenous Halloween costumes

      Halloween costumes depicting Indigenous women and girls in costume at a Regina store now have warning labels thanks to some local activists.

      Spirit Halloween in Regina is selling costumes such as ‘Reservation Royalty’, ‘Native American Princess’ and ‘Wolf Dancer’. There are similar costumes for both women and girls.

      “It’s precisely these types of images that normalize the sexualization of Indigenous women and lay the foundation for a culture that accepts the violence against Indigenous women,” said Chris Kortright who helped place the labels on the costumes.

      1. It’s precisely these types of images that normalize the sexualization of Indigenous women

        You mean they’re supposed to be frigid?

        (Well, it is Canada, I suppose.)

      2. And if they didn’t have them we would have to listen to these cunts whine about how indigenous women aren’t seen as sexy.

        1. Someone hasn’t had Dene.

        2. I paid one for a BJ once, and all she did was rub her nose against my junk for 15 minutes.

      3. “It’s precisely these types of images that normalize the sexualization of Indigenous women and lay the foundation for a culture that accepts the violence against Indigenous women,”

        This is, of course, why assaults on nurses have been dramatically increasing over the years. Oh wait…I mean, they’ve been dramatically increasing, but no one reports them. Because costumes.

        1. Eskimo pussy is mighty cold.

      4. a culture that accepts the violence against Indigenous women

        And which culture would that be? Or does Chris have a different definition of violence than I do?

        1. And which culture would that be?

          I assume he means Canadian. Up here violence against First Nations women is one of the big social justice issues, both in some major cities (Vancouver mostly) and on the reservations. They consistently try to claim that there’s some pattern of police ignoring violence and sexual assault against native women due to their race. When in reality a lot of it has to do with these women living more secluded lives and actively avoiding police due to their own issues (drugs, prostitution, etc.).

          1. Of course the solution is just to throw more money at the Tribal Council, so they can squander it around on their connected friends to get new snowmobiles and ATVs and leave the other non connected people sniffing gas.

    6. Update: Motion denied.

      An Ontario judge has quashed an attempt to attempt to bar the Cleveland Indians from using their team name and “Chief Wahoo” logo during Monday’s night playoff game in Toronto.

    7. Reminds me of 1979. Someone tried to enjoin the World Series between the Orioles and Pirates because Baltimore Memorial Stadium was allegedly not wheelchair-accessible. That effort failed too.

    8. Douglas Cardinal

      Traitor.

  14. It seemed at first as though the Department of State sought to have emails declassified in order to make it appear they weren’t holding classified messages on private servers…

    So either we are overclassifying information or, MORE LIKELY, State is completely corrupt at this point.

    1. The stupid thing is that there are only a handful of “Original Classification Authorities” – positions that decide what is and what is not classified. One of those is the Secretary of State. IOW Hilldog could have made her emails unclassified on her own authority. Basically, every time she opens her mouth on her emails she admitting she didn’t even know what here job was.

  15. “Clown Panic Grows”

    The majority of the American public are now officially retarded.

    1. Is that a clown panic in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

    2. That was what it took to convince you? This site’s plastered with evidence constantly. I need reassurances that there are still intelligent people left.

    1. Yeah I call bullshit on that. I know not one single male leg shaver. Including dem gays.

      1. Only male leg shavers I’ve ever known were kids who swam or played water polo in High School.

        1. Cyclists too, IIRC. They think it helps cut down on drag.

          1. Road cyclists, Asshole. Pretentious, eurotrash-wannabe, fixed-gear riding PUKES!

            1. I’ll translate. Most cyclists know that shaving your legs does nothing, since the skin friction drag caused by the hairs on one’s legs is pretty much a rounding error to the forces caused by things like form drag (the drag caused by shoving the air aside).

              The people who do do it are psychologically unbalanced.

              1. I never shaved mine because I never raced in an organized team. Plus…no.

                I just rode with guys who raced and was told racers did it for aerodynamics or something.

              2. I think they understood Pretentious…pukes, t.

            2. Word.

              Don’t forget with baskets on their handlebars!

              I ride my racing bike in the fields. Where there are no bike paths or inconsiderate jackoffs getting in my way.

            3. Allegedly it is easier to clean up your road rash if your legs are shaved.

          2. Yeah, how can you pass for a woman with hairy legs?

          3. Plus you get to show off your veins, to scare the competition.

          4. They think it helps cut down on drag.

            Transgender Cyclists?

          5. It makes it less painful to remove the bandages from the road rash.
            Swimmer worry about the drag.

          6. They think it helps cut down on drag.

            But once they put on that girdle and those thigh highs, all bets are off.

        2. Eh, one of my friends is a body builder and we pick on him mercilessly for shaving his body. That and he looks like he’s starving to death right before his competition.

        3. I’ve heard that some athletes who normally have their ankles taped shave a fair ways up their legs if only so that the tape doesn’t tear out all that hair when they remove the tape.

          1. Shaved my elbows for wrestling.

          2. Prewrap has been around for a long time now, those ankle shavers are doing it because they like it.

      2. I shaved mine in high school to see what it felt like. Boarding school can be pretty boring sometimes.

        1. Tell us more…

    2. Teh diabeetus causes hair loss on the lower legs. Could be that, too.

      1. Nooooooooooo! Doc didn’t tell me that. I learn something new about da sugah every day.

    3. Yeah, I call bullshit also. Shaving other places maybe. Legs? Definitely BS.

    4. Almost half of all men are shaving their legs

      I would believe a headline that says “Almost half of all men are shaving their balls” but their legs? Hmm, no.

      Full disclosure: I don’t shave my balls.

      1. Who does?

        1. Winston’s mom?

        2. Trombly does.

      2. You pluck? Ouch.

    5. I occasionally trim with clippers and a #3 guard because I’m pretty much a sasquatch below the equator. Like you could seriously braid that shit. Never razored down there though…well…except for my balls.

      1. There’s nothing quite like a shorn scrotum. It’s breathtaking, really. I suggest you try it yourself.

        1. Especially if you tan it and use it as tobacco pouch.

    1. That can’t be right, he was a teenager twenty years ago.

      1. he was a teenager twenty years ago

        No… he wasn’t.

        Coy Luther “Luke” Perry III (born October 11, 1966) is an American actor. He starred as Dylan McKay on the TV series Beverly Hills, 90210 from 1990 to 1995

        90-66 = 24

  16. FBI Director James Comey says they don’t really know if there’s an epidemic of police shootings of black men because of the lack of collected data.

    They don’t “know” if there’s an epidemic of police shooting anyone, but by all means let’s pretend that only blacks are on the receiving end of police abuses.

    1. For a moment, the issue was about police misconduct and taking steps to rein them in. For a moment, but your moment is gone.

      1. Leave it to the media to totally fuck up everything it touches. Particularly the old broadcast networks.

        1. Where are your quaint liberties now, America?

  17. Maybe the entire election is just a preview for Donald Trump’s television network?

    Given his penchant for hype and shameless self promotion, it actually wouldn’t surprise me if the whole thing’s just a viral marketing scheme.

    1. Except that his campaign has hurt his brand, according to media reports. Foot traffic at his hotels are down, for example.

      1. Finger traffic, on the other hand…

    2. I don’t know of many business owners that piss off +50% of their potential customer base in order to market their products.

      1. If you’re trying to start an “alternative” media network aimed towards a certain audience…

        1. It would probably be easier to just start the media network than to launch a faux presidential campaign.

      2. I never said he was a good businessman, just that he has a penchant for hype and shameless self promotion.

        1. Jesus. I know what he’s planning. A TV commentary show, starring Trump. With a highly paid sidekick named Barry. The format? MST3K but with current events.

    3. More likely this is his backup plan.

  18. The FBI is trying to get a federal judge to dismiss a lawsuit against them…

    No civil jury would find against the FBI so there’s no reason to let it go forward.

    1. Exactly. What difference at derpity, blah, blah, blah?

  19. The FBI also denies any “quid pro quo” offers about the two agencies working together to allow more FBI agents to work overseas.

    Well, I’m satisfied. Case closed.

    1. Let’s not hastily jump to judgment. Wait for the State Department’s statement.

      1. Their statement is a dictionary description of quid pro quo. The seem to think that because the deal was not consummated that they get a free pass

        It reminds me of the Pentagon denial there was any “stand down order” re: benghazi (“we told people to remain in place”.. totes not same thing)

        A senior State Department official requested the FBI re-review that email to determine whether it was in fact classified or whether it might be protected from release under a different FOIA exemption. A now-retired FBI official, who was not part of the subsequent Clinton investigation, told the State Department official that they would look into the matter. Having been previously unsuccessful in attempts to speak with the senior State official, during the same conversation, the FBI official asked the State Department official if they would address a pending, unaddressed FBI request for space for additional FBI employees assigned abroad.”

  20. The man convicted of shooting at George Zimmerman in a road rage incident in Florida has been sentenced to 20 years in prison.

    “I feared for my life” didn’t work?

    1. He forgot to yell, “STOP RESISTING!”

  21. If Trump wins we get fascist corporatism. If HRC wins we get WW3. Either way the Evil Empire falls. Change is good.

    1. Change is good for you also. Go to Venezuela. It’s the change you’ve been screaming for.

      1. No shit. If there was a libertarian country, I would go there yesterday.

        1. You set up AmSoc to spike us with a Somalia quip and he let us down. Bastard hasn’t even got a sense of humor. I mean, we were going to mock him anyway, so it’s not like he’s got anything to lose.

          When Gary Johnson was asked to name a world leader he admired, he couldn’t think of one off the cuff. Neither can I. Where are the libertarian world leaders who promise to leave their constituencies alone and actually do it?

    2. WW3 … is good

      Where is my shocked face that a communist is down with millions of deaths?

      1. He self-identifies as a socialist. The homicidal resentment wasn’t gonna stay bottled up forever.

        1. If you sincerely want, work tirelessly for, and actually get a socialist society and aren’t picked early on to be part of the ruling elite, pack up all the shit you can in short time and get everyone you love to leave the country with you. The useful idiots tend to be the most outspoken critics of the very systems they agitated for once they realize that it was never going to go their way. They would never imagine getting sent to the gulags, but that’s exactly where they end up. You don’t want to leave anyone behind if you can help it because they’ll all be suspected of harboring someone that they sorely need to be a political prisoner, and suspicion is all they’ll need.

          It’s the world he wants most, but not a world he could actually live in. It’s not a world that a lot of us could live in either, of course. The only difference is that he’s too myopic to see that.

    3. So if Trump wins, status quo, if Hillary wins, we die in a nuclear fire. Decisions decisions…

      1. Yeah, that’s a tough one.

    4. We do what amsoc wants, we get forced labour camps and genocide. Status quo’s looking pretty good in comparison.

    5. You don’t think we get fascism with Hillary? Hell, her campaign slogan is Stronger Together. The only thing missing is an image of a fascio.

  22. There isn’t a whole lot for me in these links.

    1. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    2. “There isn’t a whole lot for me in these links.”

      You can skip Target and go straight to Walmart.

    3. something light-hearted? with a little jab at Gary Johnson at the end

  23. Federal Government selling town in West Virginia, no minimum bid

    Anyone want to go in on this with me? We could name it “New Somalia” and it would truly be libertopia.

    And there’s already ROADZ, so we don’t even have to worry about that!

    1. This *sounds* good.

      But after the article about the hamburger sex sting I’d be a bit wary.

    2. Could be an easy buy… but property taxes on 80 houses would be a bitch. Also the fact that cell phones and radios don’t work because it’s in the middle of the National Radio Quiet Zone really kills the potential of New Somalia. Libertopia sounds great, but without wifi how would the New Somalians be able to troll the Reason comment section??

      1. Landlines with 300 baud modems. Duh.

        1. Carrier pigeons, duh!

      2. Dude, you gotta figure this shit out. That’s what we libertopians do.

    3. The NSA is still operating some facilities in Sugar Grove. Just watch out who your neighbors are.

      But come visit me if you do move in.

    4. I’m in. There’s mines too. How’s the orphan population there?

  24. “Isn’t it time to lay to rest the bomb? Servant suicide object worshipped like a God”

    http://thebulletin.org/what-wo…..hattan8023

    1. If a nuclear device was detonated over Hombre-hattan, would it rain death and socialists?

    2. “DURR ME SCARED OF WEAPON, MAKE IT MAGICALLY GO AWAY.”

      -Amsoc’s brilliant insight on complex issues. Sure worked for dynamite.

    3. Servant suicide object worshipped like a God

      Hey! That’s just like you worshiping State power! I can see why you were initially drawn to that post.

  25. The FBI is trying to get a federal judge to dismiss a lawsuit against them over the Dylann Roof’s deadly Charleston, South Carolina, shooting rampage. Roof should have been denied a gun purchase based on his criminal background, but the FBI didn’t catch it.

    Well, I, uh, don’t think it’s quite fair to condemn a whole program because of a single slip-up, sir.

    1. +1 Gen. Buck Turgidson

  26. Nothing about Assange’s internet access being shut off, right after he releases Hillary’s speeches to Goldman Sachs?

    1. Because we don’t know if it’s bullshit or not. We only know what the KGB WikiLeaks says.

    2. I’m sure the media is on the case. Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha a ha ha *starts sobbing

  27. Trump fans boo, walk out on Amy Schumer show in Tampa (w/video)

    About 200 people walked out of Amy Schumer’s comedy show at the Amalie Arena in Tampa Sunday when she mocked Donald Trump as, among other things, an “orange, sexual-assaulting, fake- college-starting monster.”

    She made it clear she doesn’t understand how people can support Trump. At one point, she asked for a Trump supporter – preferably one with sleeves, she told security personnel – to join her up on stage to explain their enthusiasm for Trump. One fellow did, but he said he was voting for Trump mainly because he doesn’t trust Clinton. When some audience members booed, the actor/comedian invited them to leave and also asked security to remove anyone booing.

    The video, for those of you who want enjoy condescension.

    1. The question no one will answer, why Amy Schumer has the body of a 35 yr old woman, but the face of a 7 yr old girl?

      1. Those Schumer genes produce unnatural results, like men with d-cup bosoms.

      2. It’s really five seven-year-old girls operating an experimental mecha built by the Michelin company.

      3. She’s a Cabbage Patch Person?

    2. “I don’t want to hear that. We wanted to have a good night without distractions with the politics,” said Bryon Infinger.

      So you went to an Amy Schumer show?

  28. I figured Reason would be all over this:

    http://www.realclearpolitics.c…..rters.html

    Politically motivated firebombing of campaign offices, third party agitators funded to inciting violence coming from the very top of a major political party, prosecution of disfavored media outlets and individuals, burdensome taxes on disfavored groups, unrelenting slander towards political opponents…

    No, I am not talking about Germany in the twenties, Russia in the 19teens, or China in the 19teens, or Cambodia in the 1960’s, or Cuba in the 1950’s, or Venezuela in the 1990’s or…

    It is amazing to me how blind and stupid journalists can be. Leftists are the same everywhere and always. They are dying to do all that here and everyday getting closer to being able to get away with it in no small part due to journalists. If you work in journalism ask yourself – who the fuck do you think will be among the first up against the wall? You fucking idiots can keep telling yourself it will be the basket of deplorables while they are putting the blindfold on you.

    I fully expect James O’keefe to be prosecuted over this video. If that fails he will probably got the way of Andrew Brietbart.

    1. They spent months preaching about the dangers of political violence because one old man punched someone at a Trump rally. Now we have a firebombing of a campaign headquarters and suddenly political violence just isn’t any big deal. It is almost as if they didn’t mean a word of what they said all summer or something. Nah. That couldn’t be. The various reason fanboys assure me that I am just engaging in mind reading whenever I don’t give them every possible benefit of the doubt. Maybe reason hasn’t heard about this story? Yeah that is it.

      1. But Palin put ‘X’s on a map!!

        1. That was just to mark where Palin’s Buttplug was to sit.

    2. I posted that above, but it’s worth repeating.

      It is amazing to me how blind and stupid journalists can be. Leftists are the same everywhere and always. They are dying to do all that here and everyday getting closer to being able to get away with it in no small part due to journalists. If you work in journalism ask yourself – who the fuck do you think will be among the first up against the wall? You fucking idiots can keep telling yourself it will be the basket of deplorables while they are putting the blindfold on you.

      No one ever imagines it’ll be their skull under the boot or their back against the wall.

      Or, to borrow from a classic – They always shoot you in the back of the neck.

      1. Journalists are most certainly stupid. They also support this most of them. Look at how often they are caught having violent fantasies about their political opponents or celebrating the death of someone on the right. They ignore leftwing political violence because they don’t see anything wrong with it but are too dishonest to admit as much.

        1. It isnt just the journalists John. That is a common syndrome. An acquaintance of my wife and faithful dem/Hillary supporter refuses to discuss politics. My wife didn’t understand why.

          “Because she is dumb as a fucking mud brick, she’s wrong, she knows she is wrong but will never change her position and she doesnt want you pointing all of that out and embarrassing her. It is as simple as that.”

          Once she heard it laid out plainly she agreed it was pretty obvious.

      2. “No one ever imagines it’ll be their skull under the boot or their back against the wall.”

        You can witness this type of delusion right here on Reason. Just listen at Tony calling for the government to murder libertarians.

        1. Or Tony Fischer’s earlier outrage at ‘venerable’ journalist Amy Goodman being prosecuted for having a point of view not favored by the government. He seemed somewhat incredulous.

          Sooner or later under a system like the one the left invariably builds all of the existing media structure is decimated and replaced with party hacks. There is no excuse for not seeing this coming. The words and actions too numerous to list by leftists here and the long history, some of it very recent, of their behavior give us a pretty clear indication.

          Just like the idiots who voted Obumbles because…whatever the fuck their justification was…there is simply no excuse for it.

          1. By ‘their behavior’ I meant leftists in general.

            1. Also, I posted the first article with the link s there would be record of me predicting O’keefe being prosecuted.

              Wiretapping? Slander? How will they go about it? I don’t know for sure, but I am betting it will happen.

          2. If they don’t already see it coming by the shameless collusion of the media with Hillary, then they aren’t going to see it coming. And do they actually care if their team is in charge? I think that not only do they not care, but they like it.

          3. Sooner or later under a system like the one the left invariably builds all of the existing media structure is decimated and replaced with party hacks. There is no excuse for not seeing this coming.

            Problem is, that it’s already happened.

    3. “I’m saying we have mentally ill people, that we pay to do shit, make no mistake,” says Foval in the video. “Over the last twenty years, I’ve paid off a few homeless guys to do some crazy stuff, and I’ve also taken them for dinner, and I’ve also made sure they had a hotel, and a shower. And I put them in a program. Like I’ve done that. But the reality is, a lot of people especially our union guys. A lot of our union guys?they’ll do whatever you want. They’re rock and roll. When I need to get something done in Arkansas, the first guy I call is the head of the AFL-CIO down there, because he will say, ‘What do you need?’ And I will say, I need a guy who will do this, this and this. And they find that guy. And that guy will be like, Hell yeah, let’s do it.”

      Somehow I doubt this will get any air time, anywhere. At least not more than a 5 second lead-in to the latest Trump-is-Hitler monologue. It’d be nice if Nick Gillespie wasn’t at the helm, it might get some play on the pages of Reason otherwise.

    4. This is where the left is going, it’s where they always go. Everyone will not willingly accept their insane economy and freedom killing ideas, so violence is always going to the answer. I really do look for them to call for the arrest and detainment of Trump and Johnson voters after the election.

      1. I don’t know about the voters, but if Trump loses I would advise him to stop getting on airplanes.

        1. Hillary is known to have an enemies list. This is going to get very ugly.

    5. I figured Reason would be all over this:

      Why, does it help Hillary’s campaign in some tagential way?

  29. Paging DOOMco- update on Toyota, goddammit.

    1. Hey brooks, it was the alternator and a couple bad wires from the alternator to the starter.
      I have started to assemble the parts needed to run a 2 battery setup, to prevent this.

  30. Florida Woman comes through.

    Florida Woman Donates Her Pubic Hair To Donald Trump

    A woman in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, has Donald Trump by the short hairs now.

    Her own.

    Emily Robinson heard Trump’s now-infamous “grab her by the pussy” comments around the same time her house received a mailer from the Republican presidential nominee’s campaign asking for donations. She decided to comply.

    But instead of sending cash, Robinson sent Trump a message ? clippings of her own pubic hairs.

    1. Florida is weird, but Fort Lauderdale weirdness usually comes exclusively from drunken tourists. Not this time though.

      1. Fort Lauderdale is full of the superrich. They can pay people to cover up their Floridianness.

        1. Nah. The superrich live either on Star Island off Miami or up in the Palm Beaches. Fort Lauderdale’s got the merely rich (and a lot of shitty areas as well).

    2. I need to get into real estate and then get my own television show where I fire people.

      1. Get a small loan of $10 million from your dad, that’ll help.

    3. Good Lord.

      If *that’s* not sexual harassment I don’t know what is.

      1. It’s okay because Trump is an ungoodthinker.

    4. uh… gross?

      1. Things are about to get hairy.

        1. Some things are getting less hairy….

  31. Retired Gen. Cartwright Charged with Making False Statements

    Retired Marine Gen. James Cartwright has been charged with making false statements during a federal investigation into a leak of classified information, the Justice Department announced Monday.

    Cartwright, a former vice chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, falsely told investigators that he was not the source of classified information contained in a book by New York Times journalist David Sanger, according to charging documents unsealed by prosecutors.

    Neither the book nor the classified subject is identified in court papers. But Sanger has written about a covert cyberattack on Iran’s nuclear facilities and the use of a computer virus called Stuxnet to temporarily disable centrifuges that the Iranians were using to enrich uranium

    Cartwright, 67, was vice chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff from 2007 until 2011, and was considered a key close adviser to Obama. A former fighter pilot, the Marine general was known for his expertise in the more highly technical areas of cyberwarfare and America’s nuclear enterprise.

    1. What about Hoss and Little Joe?

      1. He should have blamed Hop Sing.

        1. They screwed up not making him a recurring character on Kung Fu.

            1. You know, you’ll never snatch pebbles from hands with that kind of talk.

              1. Especially if Bam-Bam is nearby.

    2. At this point how is DOJ not just a secret police? They have a web of laws that give them the ability to get anyone they want and then selectively prosecute those laws based on the will of the powers that be. IF that is not a secret police, what is?

      1. Because they’re not secret, duh. And we’re not a police state. What kind of paranoid wingnut are you?

        1. Everyone knew about the Stasi. In fact, everyone knowing about your secret police and being afraid of them is the entire point of having them.

        2. When I was about 20 or so I was making a long distance swim in 80ish degree water. About a half-mile out my hamstring cramped up badly. I tried to be calm and just kept telling myself that I had plenty of time to rub and stretch and get the cramp out. I wouldn’t sink that much so I closed my eyes held my breath and worked on it. When the cramp finally quit I opened my eyes and looked up. I nearly panicked. The surface had to be 20 feet up. I didn’t think I had enough air left to make it.

          I was stunned at how fast I had sunk so far without realizing it.

          1. +1 dead man’s float

      2. Do they have dueling scars on their faces, John?!?

        Then I guess they *aren’t* a secret police, are they?

        1. +1 Tony Montana

    3. He should employ the Hillary Clinton Defense.

      1. I think she should be henceforth referred to as Hillary “Ike” Clanton.

      2. That has been tried a couple of times. Each time the judge responded with “Who the fuck do you think you are? A Clinton? No.” and then slams the gavel down.

  32. Maybe the entire election is just a preview for Donald Trump’s television network?

    I’ve suspected that was it all along.

    1. Like Iraq was all about taking their oil.

      1. What a canard that turned out to be. We didn’t do that, of course, but with our massive production ability, which was fully demonstrated just a matter of years later, it’s clear we had little motive to.

        1. We invaded Iraq to enforce the authority of the UNSC. It was the most progressive, internationalist and Wilsonian war this country has ever fought.

          1. Weird, isn’t it? No wonder everyone is so confused about U.S. politics.

      2. Like Iraq was all about taking their oil.

        I don’t get it.

        I always though that one was a bit silly. There are a lot easier ways to get oil.

        1. An acquaintance of mine was discussing that with me when that canard was first floated. He had worked over there for years, Iran not Iraq. His words; “You cant have shit there. Every night some goat fucker in a dress sneaks out and puts a bomb on your pipeline, employees sabotage wells or plants or trucks. We won’t get a drop. ”

          Canard indeed.

        2. Like buy it. Which is all we wanted anyway.

  33. “If You are Still Taking Juian Assange Seriously After the First 30 Minutes Then You *Are* the Sucker”

    http://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblo…..the-sucker

    Nice. He should walk around with a roving Christopher Nolan soundtrack. The same goes for his son– Edward Snowden.

    1. Yes because the content of authentic emails should be ignored because we don’t like who released them. Assange is only important because Hillary is so stupid and corrupt. Had she not had so much to hide and been so incredibly stupid, Assange would have nothing to release.

      1. Shoot the messenger. That’s their MO.

      2. Taking the man himself seriously or not is really pretty irrelevant if what he has released is real.

      3. If the media had done their damn job and actually been digging into Clinton maybe people wouldn’t be turning to alternative sources to find the truth.

    2. Sorry amsoc, I can’t hear a word of what you are saying over the sound of how stupid you are. Have a totalitarian day!

    3. “If You are Still Taking Juian Assange Seriously After the First 30 Minutes Then You *Are* the Sucker”

      “If you DON’T take him seriously, then you’re a sucker, too! How would you KNOW, you ask? Depends on the target. Why bother with logical consistency or intellectual honesty? Those are the tools of the bourgeoisie, anyway!”

      /A Marxian in orbit around planet Marx.

    4. It’s all about attacking the messenger to distract from the message. Did the same thing with Snowden

    5. I bet all the customers at the Starbucks you work at hate your guts. Go make me an espresso bitch.

    6. “DURR ME CONSTANTLY COME ONTO REASON TO INSULT PEOPLE WHO BELIEVE MOUNDS OF EVIDENCE OF CORRUPTION, ME NO DEFEND CLINTON THOUGH.”

      -Amsoc’s brilliant attempts at deflection.

      1. He doesn’t like-like Clinton, he only likes Clinton. And he didn’t even vote for Bill in 1996! But let’s talk about how awful the Republicans are. And they’re always awful…

    7. No one is taking or not taking Assange seriously. Or Snowden. This isnt about the leakers, it is about Clinton.

      We are just looking at the content they released asshole. Do you really believe that defense or are you trying to convince us?

    8. “If You are Still Taking Juian Assange Seriously After the First 30 Minutes Then You *Are* the Sucker”

      I take Hillary’s and Podesta’s E-mails seriously. And it doesn’t matter to me whether they are delivered by Assange, Snowden, Putin, or the Easter Bunny.

  34. But instead of sending cash, Robinson sent Trump a message ? clippings of her own pubic hairs.

    In a Coke can?

    1. Re: The Late P Brooks,

      In a Coke can?

      In a bottle. Doesn’t the name Robinson ring a bell, huh?

      1. Mrs Robinson, I think you are trying to seduce me.

    2. Finally, there’s a logic to all of this. Just where is Anita Hill, anyway?

      1. Following Clarence Thomas to his next job.

        1. They’ve been married all along, haven’t they?

  35. Halloween costume sugggestion:

    Mushroom Hat Costume Accessory

    Creepy clowns have nothing on this guy.

    1. Can’t unsee that! Criminy!

    2. I see you found Cytotoxic’s daddy.

      1. Lil’ Canuck seems to be gone for good. I suppose there’s the possibility he’ll come back to give the Trumpetarians shit if Hag wins, but I think we’ve seen the last of him.

        1. Maybe he is Amish and that moment in time he was here was part of his rumspringa.

        2. Maybe they finally deported him back to Canuckistan and there’s no intertoobz on the tunrda he hails from.

        3. Speaking of trolls, anyone seen shreek in a while? Maybe he’s on cankle slurping duty until after election day.

          1. Don’t you have an orphan to torture?

  36. “If You are Still Taking Juian Assange Seriously After the First 30 Minutes Then You *Are* the Sucker”

    The new angle of attack, apparently. There was a long and tedious Bloomberg piece the other day about how crazy Assange is, and that’s why we can safely ignore the actual content of all those emails.

    1. Just so I understand, Trump is crazy so he’s the most serious thing ever; Assange is crazy so he can be safely ignored.

    2. I agree he’s probably nuts, and a hardcore lefty as well… but unlike amsoc or Hillary voters, he’s actually smart enough to see that Clinton and her corrupt insider cadre are as bad if not worse than any “right wing” threat at the moment

    3. So Assange forged the emails, too?

    1. Were they forced to be there or is that only for Lyin’ Ted?

      1. It was at their convocation, whether that’s compulsory or not, it says that the Johnson-supporting students arrived early so as to be sure to get good seats.

        Which implies there was a decent-sized audience, compulsory or not.

        I mean, seriously, you libertarians just can’t take yes for an answer.

  37. Maybe the entire election is just a preview for Donald Trump’s television network?

    Not TrumpTV – I’m starting to think we’re all just background characters in some alien race’s version of The Truman Show and the ratings have slipped to the point where the producers have decided to inject a little conflict for dramatic effect. I mean, c’mon, Trump and Hillary. You’re gonna tell me at least one of those two isn’t an alien in a human-skin costume?

    1. Don’t blame me, I voted for Kodos!

  38. I went to Target to get a clown mask for Halloween, but there were none.
    So I settled for a big sombrero and a pancho.* I will wear that to my local SJW Halloween party!

    *I mean a REAL pancho…A Mexican poncho. Not a Sears (or Target) poncho.

    1. +1 Mud Shark

  39. I really do look for them to call for the arrest and detainment of Trump and Johnson voters after the election.

    It’s a vital issue of national security. Those murderous guntoting troglodytes have all pledged fealty to Trump and death to Herself.

  40. BTW, a friend who’s a Democrat intimated that Donald Trump was using his campaign and hopefully the presidency as a platform for his reality show, suggesting that Trump being distracted by the operation of a show while in the white house was a bad thing. If this was supposed to make me not vote for Trump, he’s doing it wrong.

    1. Title: “Full of Shit House”

    2. Hell, that’s the best reason for voting for him. Otherwise, Trump and Clinton are so terrible that a number of people are actually aware of the name of the LP candidate.

    3. I think he should switch up his campaign and run on the promise of making the presidency into a reality TV show. If he does that, I’ll vote for him.

  41. Politico’s Chief Correspondent To John Podesta: “Don’t Tell Anyone I Did This”

    As if there was any doubt at this point that the media is fully in bed with the Clinton campaign, Glenn Thrush, Politco’s Chief Political Correspondent, decided to make it crystal clear in the following email to Podesta back in April 2015 in which he admits that he has “become a hack.” The email below from Thrush was sent to get guidance related to an article he published the very next day entitled “Hillary’s Big-Money Dilemma.”

    1. They are just scum.

  42. It seems that Gary Johnson has lost Bethany Mandel, “senior contributor” at the Federalist, who explained to Stossel why she’s not #feelingtheJohnson –

    1. He didn’t grab her pussy hard enough.

    2. tl;dr her reasons are:

      – Johnson tried to establish moral equivalency between Syria and the U.S.
      – Johnson openly smokes dope despite it being illegal
      – Cake

      1. Both Clinton, Bush and Obama admitted to using drugs when they were younger.

        1. Both Clinton, Bush, and Obama… *thumb finger finger* Both… *thumb finger finger*

          *scrathces melon, ponders*

          *thumb finger finger*

          I demand a recount

  43. I hope Trump re-decorates the White House in the gaudy, gauche, glitzy style of Trump Tower.

    1. I really doubt the Clintons will hire him to re-decorate.

    2. He’ll make the White House White Again.

    3. If Hillary wins it will reek of that stuff they clean hospitals with.

      1. Just imagine that in combination with old fat lady smell and adult depends. Ewwww!

      2. If Hillary wins, she can bring back all the stuff she and her husband stole on their way out.

        1. Are you kidding, they’ll take what’s left instead.

    4. Still would be better than Obama’s bland Oval Office and Michelle’s mismatched family dining room.

  44. I hope Trump re-decorates the White House in the gaudy, gauche, glitzy style of Trump Tower.

    ’70s Vegas Mobster Style.

    1. Complete with waiters in Elvis gear.

  45. Donald Trump, Mad Prophet of the Airwaves!

    1. Master of the power of the air. Is Donald the anti-christ? I haven’t heard who that is these days. I think Obama was the last time I heard.

    1. That is awesome.

    2. “Nobel Committee: Blow me in the wind!”

    3. I knew a guy in college named Robert Zimmerman. Sign on his door:

      “It Ain’t Me, Babe.”

    4. It would be hilarious if he told them to shove it.

      1. It would have been hilarious forty years ago. Now, it would just be a sad get-off-my-lawn moment.

  46. Clinton’s Email Scandal Gets Even More Complicated

    That’s because it’s not one scandal but dozens that run together.

    You know how fish swarm in order to avoid predation? The swarm is so big and so constantly in motion that predators can’t single in on any fish. Well, that’s how Hillary’s scandals work: they swarm, so that her political opponents can’t single in on any one of them.

  47. The FBI also denies any “quid pro quo” offers about the two agencies working together to allow more FBI agents to work overseas.

    From the original documents:

    [Redacted] indicated that he had been contacted by Patrick Kennedy, Undersecretary of State, who had asked his assistance in altering the email’s classification in exchange for a quid pro quo. [redacted] advised that in exchange for making the email unclassified State would reciprocate by allowing the FBI to place more agents in countries where they are presently forbidden.

    1. But they didnt! Promise!

    2. Who ya gonna believe – the FBI or your lyin eyes??

  48. until I looked at the paycheck saying $4730 , I did not believe that…my… brother woz like actualy bringing in money part time from there computar. . there friend brother started doing this for less than 7 months and resently paid for the morgage on there home and bought a new Cadillac …….

    ……………… http://www.jobprofit9.com

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