Cybersecurity

Shhhhh! Don't Tell Russia, but We're Totally Gonna Cyber Their Asses!

Maybe focus on protecting American data, not seeking revenge for Clinton's embarrassment?

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Joe Biden
Brett Marty/Polaris/Newscom

It's not clear what to make of NBC's weekend report that the CIA is plotting a cyberattack against the Russian government (Vladimir Putin in particular) or why sources decided to go public about it.

To summarize: The CIA has apparently been planning a cyber counterstrike to expose information intended to "embarrass" the Kremlin and "unsavory tactics by Russian President Vladimir Putin." Why this has been made public is anybody's guess, but Vice President Joe Biden confirmed with a wink and a nod to Meet the Press that America is "sending a message" to Russia. When asked whether the public would know about this message, Biden responded, very Bidenly, "Hope not."

While we try to wrap our minds around the idea of the public not finding out about a cyberattack Biden is openly promoting on a Sunday talk show, NBC does get a sense of the internal conflict with the administration about whether it's possible to retaliate against Russia in any meaningful way:

A second former officer, who helped run intelligence operations against Russia, said he was asked several times in recent years to work on covert action plans, but "none of the options were particularly good, nor did we think that any of them would be particularly effective," he said.

Putin is almost beyond embarrassing, he said, and anything the U.S. can do against, for example, Russian bank accounts, the Russian can do in response.

Really, what exactly is America going to be revealing about Russia or Putin at this point that its citizens don't already know? The winter Olympics in Russia were an absurdly costly, cronyist affair for a country where average citizens suffer remarkably low standards of living. Critics of Putin tend to wind up dead. Yes, Putin's hold over the media in Russia tends to help him withhold critical information from citizens, but you'd have to be naïve to think Putin is in power simply because Russians don't know the kind of guy he is.

What's remarkable about the story, though, is how little it engages in the actual content that (allegedly) Russian hackers have leaked about Democratic politics and Hillary Clinton and how this information has ended up feeding the polarized political discussion made entirely out of soundbites and carefully managed outrage.

As I noted back when hackers leaked internal emails from the Democratic National Committee, Putin wasn't responsible for the party treating Bernie Sanders like crap. And as embarrassing (and yes, criminal) as it is to have Clinton campaign chair John Podesta's emails getting put out there by Wikileaks, it's also not Russia's fault voters are getting reminders that Clinton is exactly the calculating politician she's often accused of being.

And yet the Democratic response appears to increasingly be this ad hominem-driven deflection that the problem here is the source of the information. Yes, it is bad that our political institutions are being hacked by Russians, don't get me wrong. But is there any attempt by Clinton partisans to learn at all from the outraged response by some citizens to the contents of this information?

One of the stories coming out today from files released about Clinton's private server scandal is that Pat Kennedy, a State Department official under Clinton, attempted to pressure the FBI to downgrade the classified ratings of a bunch of emails in her private server as "unclassified" last year in exchange for the State Department allowing more FBI agents to operate in foreign countries where they normally were not allowed. The FBI declined.

The FBI responded today that this request came prior to the investigation of Clinton's server use and was connected to Freedom of Information Act requests, not accusations of improper handling. As for the request by the FBI for more staff in foreign country, the agency says that was discussed in the same conversation but denied there was any sort of "quid pro quo." And it will be difficult to prove otherwise because neither side agreed. The files remained classified.

The Clinton campaign has responded, as they typically have, that this is all just complicated negotiations about classification ratings and nothing special or odd. So in this case, Clinton in her staff are all super-savvy about classification, though when the FBI interviewed Clinton, she claimed to not even know what the "C"-classification stamp even meant.

The entire manner by which Clinton and her enablers have handled her email controversies have inspired a lot of cynicism from those who aren't already planning to vote for her. While this new news isn't directly connected to the Podesta leaks, the natural inclination to deflect the criticism and concerns to something else entirely continues to help explain why Clinton is not running away with this election.

The alleged pending cyberattack on Russia is also a very helpful reminder that we are operating under a federal government and intelligence agency that seems to be prizing the ability to engage in hacking and infiltration over the desire to protect Americans from intrusion. Note that this debate is over whether to punish Russia for embarrassing the Democratic Party and Clinton, not about how to prevent future breaches. This is why it's so important to have private companies devoted to developing encryption tools for our use and why it's important to stand against a government that wants to corrupt it. They seem more interested in playing cyber-wargames than protecting our data.

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  1. Thanks Scott! Good read.

    1. Scott is consistently the most level-headed writer on staff.

      1. Agreed. And he always delivers on the alt-text.

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    2. I think he kissed the point. When Biden says “cyber their asses”, he means that there will be a Joe Biden cam show, complete with big black double ended dildoes, anal beads, and Janet Reno blow up dolls. This will be forced onto Russian computer machines as pop ups.

      This will be retaliation enough.

      1. “Kissed the point” and “joe Biden cam show?”
        That’s definitely a Freudian slip.

        1. Auto correct is a back stabbing bitch some days.

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  2. This is one of them good leaks that no one gets charged for.

    1. Did Biden leak? Depends …

      1. In Biden’s case, he needs them on both ends since the same stuff leaks out of both ends.

  3. Yeah, let’s totally start a war with Russia because Julian Assange is embarrassing out political elite class. Makes perfect sense.

    1. Well, Assange was totally cool when he was embarrassing Bush, but now he’s embarrassing Hillary! who is the most qualified human being to ever draw a breath. Off with his head!

      1. Assange is a Russian puppet, along with Snowden and Trump. We’re supposed to actually believe this shit.

        1. Yes, because its a well known fact that Hillary and the Democrats know next to nothing about securing e-mail servers….

        2. Instead of believing the boogeyman is hiding behind every tree, they seem to think there’s Russian agents and puppets behind every tree. And to think, many of these same people were disparaging Mitt Romney 4 years ago for having a “cold war mentality.”

          1. We can’t be worrying too much about Russia, there are scary clowns on the loose right here in America! And most of them are in Congress!

        3. I love this morning’s Dem Op download:

          (1) Trump is a nut for saying our elections are rigged.

          (2) The Russians are totally trying to rig our elections!

      2. Or drone him, as Hillary suggested.

        Something else you’ll hear chirping crickets from the media about.

    2. I don’t know if this alone would start a war with Russia, but you’re right that the political elites seem more interested in playing Jenga with our foreign relations and protecting the status quo domestically than they are with leading the country to peace and prosperity.

      Tough talk is just talk until you say the wrong thing and get punched in the mouth for it. Problem is that we’ve gotten used to being the bully that pushes everyone around and forgot what it was like getting punched in the mouth right up until we’re standing there trying to blink away the disbelief. For all the criticizing the left did of Bush, the “cowboy President”, it’s exactly his type of rhetoric and behavior they intend to crystallize in the presidency.

    3. Typical online conversation with Hillary supporter:

      Hillmoron: “WIKILEAKS IS A RUSHN OP!! TEH RUSHNZ ARE BEHIND IT ALL *ARGLEBARGLE* !!11!!1!!”

      Me: “Any evidence for that?”

      Hillmoron: “TEH EMALZ WERE ALTERED!!11!!! *mouth foaming* THEY ARE ALL LIEEEZZZZ!!!”

      Me: “So are there file hashes showing that? Has Podesta released the originals, showing the editing?”

      Hillmoron: “YOU LURRVE TRUMP!!! WHY U SUPPORT TRUMP!!!!”

      (Repeat daily until November 8.)

  4. but Vice President Joe Biden confirmed with a wink and a nod to Meet the Press that America is “sending a message” to Russia. When asked whether the public would know about this message, Biden responded, very Bidenly, “Hope not.”

    This isn’t the first time this kind of thing has happened.

    1. This is how international incidents get started, apparently: not with a bang or even a security breach, but with a direct message accidentally made public.

      “Can I really blame another country for something they didn’t do?” Selina asks her advisers in what is as close as this administration gets to a strategy meeting.

      “It’s been the cornerstone of American foreign policy since the Spanish-American War,” replies Ben, her chief of staff.

    2. After Cunton’s elected, the press will line up behind her and promote war with Russia just like they did with Iraq. They’ve already got a running start with this email release. Thanks to her and Obummer, we’re already in a proxy war with Russia in Syria. She can’t wait to start WWIII; it’ll distract her lapdog media from her manifold other corrupt dealings, and she’ll get the best chance ever to show how tough she is when she’s throwing other people’s kids at a fight.

  5. Way to Trump-et national secrets to the pesky Russians, Shackelford, you Putin supporter.

  6. Look, if we are going to have Top Men in charge of our lives, could we at least get Top Men who aren’t complete dumbasses?

    1. Totally cyber that shit.

      1. We’re going to grab Russia by the cyber.

    2. You ableist!

    3. No, it’s a prerequisite for even running for office.

    4. eGOP maven Peggy Noonan’s Friday WSJ column asked exactly the same thing:

      If Russia is indeed behind the leaks of the emails of Democratic Party operatives Mr. Putin may have many reasons, as he often does, but the most frightening would be that he views the current American political leadership class as utterly decadent and unworthy of traditional diplomatic norms and boundaries. And, thinks, therefore, it deserves what it gets.

      Why would he find them decadent?morally hollowed out, unserious? That is the terrible part: because he knows them.

      Here’s what you see in the emails: the writers are the worst kind of snobs, snobs with nothing to recommend them. In their expression and thoughts they are common, banal, dumb, uninformed, parochial.

      I don’t know about you but when people look down on me I want them to be distinguished or outstanding in some way?towering minds, people of exquisite sensibility or learning. Not these grubbly poseurs, these people who’ve never had a thought but only a sensation: Christians are backward, I saw it in a movie!

      It’s the big fact of American life now, isn’t it? That we are patronized by our inferiors.

      1. It’s the big fact of American life now, isn’t it? That we are patronized by our inferiors.

        Good line. Good, depressing, horrible line.

      2. I don’t know about you but when people look down on me I want them to be distinguished or outstanding in some way?towering minds, people of exquisite sensibility or learning. Not these grubbly poseurs, these people who’ve never had a thought but only a sensation: Christians are backward, I saw it in a movie!

        This is, in fact, what I demand. I didn’t mind being looked down on in the construction job for not knowing the first fucking thing about building a plant (although I didn’t get very much of that, mostly, people would just tell me what I didn’t know and needed to). I deserved it. I went and joined a class of people who make a good living by knowing how to build shit, and I was working with them, but not one of them. Having some asshole who doesn’t know the first thing about private enterprise progsplain why I’m a heartless bastard for thinking the only sustainable economy is the one that is least regulated annoys the everliving fuck out of me.

      3. Seeing as Noonan has spent decades patronizing her superiors, I have to laugh a little at this column. She’s (finally) got a good point there, though.

      4. I find that the smarter someone actually is, the less likely they are to be a snob.

        It’s the ones that are merely a bit above average that are the worst.

  7. I have it on good authority that the attack against Russia will be in the form of overloading their servers with Uncle Joe’s personal porn collection, which consists entirely of digital scans of Penthouse Magazine from 1977 to 1993.

    1. I figured he would have Hot Rod Magazine in there too.

      1. Well sure, but he doesn’t want to give Ivan the good stuff.

    2. I figured Biden as more of a Cheri man, myself.

      1. Cheri changed its name to Giant Pubic Hair Monthly in 1989.

          1. Jezebel runs Chunk.

      2. Buttcake.

    3. There’s an Onion article in here somewhere…

  8. When asked whether the public would know about this message, Biden responded, very Bidenly, “Hope not.”

    I’ll bet. He wouldn’t want the public to see our glorious government experts step on their cocks and fall on their faces.

    1. Oh come on. Their legs aren’t *that* short.

  9. We’ve always been at war with Russia.

    1. doubleplusgood

  10. One look at that photo of Smiling Joe, and this is all I can think of:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYuBDIWpvT4

    1. I was thinking that somehow the Joker had become VP.

      1. The Joker is much brighter that Uncle Joe.

  11. Maybe focus on protecting American data, not seeking revenge for Clinton’s embarrassment?

    The Queen has been embarrassed. They must pay! /progtard

  12. Hillary Clinton, the bilious crawl space of socialist realizations, has spent decades dovetailing with like-minded exploiters who fucking frolic through political fields they’ve pillaged with contempt and deceit.

    Experts in the ravaging of gentle societies flock to the Clintons.

    Cutting the goddamn eyes out of your fucking skull in order to stammer you can’t see the flies whirring in orgasm clouds over this cancer army of nauseating putrefaction died as an excuse a long fucking time ago.

    1. Amen.

  13. Good to see the administration continues to pursue its “don’t do stupid shit” strategy.

  14. So in this case, Clinton in her staff are all super-savvy about classification, though when the FBI interviewed Clinton, she claimed to not even know what the “C”-classification stamp even meant.

    And her sycophants and bootlickers will continue to believe that both are simultaneously true. Is there a stronger term for this kind of shit than cognitive dissonance? Seems like there should be.

    1. It’s not cognitive dissonance. The left have no self conflict when it comes to power being the only thing that matters. When they say otherwise, that’s lying.

    2. Is there a stronger term for this kind of shit than cognitive dissonance

      Paging George Orwell.

    3. She was just being a super clever lawyer!

    4. The real question is how to stop them for the long term. No one likes my ideas about spaying/neutering/euthanizing progtards, so what is the alternative?

  15. And Putin will punk Obumbles yet again. An essential characteristic of an ideologue is the inability to learn.

    1. This is why this entire thing about Putin wanting Trump to win is so ridiculous. He knows that Hillary is 4 more years of the same bumbling fumbling foreign policy from the USA. Putin would love for Hillary to be potus, what more could he ask for? He can probably buy Alaska back from her on the cheap.

      1. Shit, he can probably blackmail her with the emails hacked from her server.

      2. Actually, it’s not unreasonable that he’d want Trump to win. Clinton has shown herself to favor an aggressive foreign stance, and Putin can’t back down in the face of a President Clinton without seeming weak, so if he believes she’ll take it all the way to war and he wants to both avoid war and avoid backing down he would want Trump. While Clinton can be bought, she also has a vindictive mean streak and has a tendency towards escalating situations. Trump is more an empty braggadocio who loves negotiating and getting his ego stroked while making “good deals”. Putin may think it would be easier to cut a face saving deal with Trump.

        1. This makes some sense. He thinks Hillary is a stupid twat who will start bombing shit. That’s not good for business.

  16. No one should worry. Hillary has a reset button.

    1. And only Huma knows how to rub, i mean lick, i mean squeeze……oh forget it.

  17. Yes, Putin Hillary Clinton’s hold over the media in Russia the US tends to help him her withhold critical information from citizens, but you’d have to be na?ve to think Putin Clinton is will be in power simply because Russians Americans don’t know the kind of guy person he she is.

    It works this way, too.

  18. This blanking the Russians sit is getting out of hand. My progtard GF thinks Russia wants Trump elected. Which doesn’t make any fucking sense to me. But that’s the party line, so she sincerely believes it to be true.
    Now, my other friend, who is much better looking, albeit not the brightest, says she is voting for Johnson. I’m thinking about switching which one I sleep with.

    1. If you are dating a progtard, she must have epic tits.

      pic?

  19. While we try to wrap our minds around the idea of the public not finding out about a cyberattack Biden is openly promoting on a Sunday talk show

    Come on, who watches Sunday talk shows?

    1. Reason staff writers looking for an article idea.

  20. Putin is almost beyond embarrassing

    So is Biden, so….

  21. Vice President Joe Biden confirmed with a wink and a nod to Meet the Press that America is “sending a message” to Russia

    And that message is that we are becoming increasingly incompetent and don’t need to be taken very seriously.

  22. Wendy: My father was in the Secret Service, Mr. Manfredjensenjen, and I happen to know perfectly well that you do not keep the general public informed when you are debriefing KGB in a safe house.
    Otto: Oh you don’t?
    Wendy: Not unless you’re congenitally insane or irretrievably stupid, no.
    Otto: Don’t call me stupid.
    Wendy: Why on Earth not?

  23. Note that this debate is over whether to punish Russia for embarrassing the Democratic Party and Clinton

    I was going to post something exactly to that effect. This is the equivalent of a PI giving some woman evidence that her husband was cheating. Yeah, he has a reason to be pissed about the invasion of privacy, but if that’s his only defense then there’s a good chance he’s going to lose his balls. Unfortunately, the same fate will probably not befall Clinton and the Democratic Party.

    1. Meanwhile, we are to be assured that Putin does not have Hillary’s emails.

  24. Yes, it is bad that our political institutions are being hacked by Russians, don’t get me wrong.

    Good thing it isn’t happening, then.

    1. Wait, there’s someone on the planet who actually believes that non-sense?

  25. It’s Stuxnet all the way down …

  26. Shhhhh-don’t tell Russia but we are going to kill Russians in Syria

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-buEyZnUBE

  27. I’m going to omit all the things that are simply, on their face, outrageous to ask a simple question.

    Does anyone here think, for a minute, that transferring hostilities to an online tit-for-tat with any takers makes any sense? The biggest advantage the U.S. can bring to the game is the huge imbalance of resources it has in its favor. But, cyberwarfare strikes me as inherently asymmetrical. You don’t need a lot of resources to compete very effectively. That battle seems to me as the one that we most emphatically don’t want to fight.

    Any thoughts?

  28. RE: Shhhhh! Don’t Tell Russia, but We’re Totally Gonna Cyber Their Asses!
    Maybe focus on protecting American data, not seeking revenge for Clinton’s embarrassment?

    Of course we should seek revenge on Russia.
    How else is the USA going to improve relations with that nation?

  29. Putin’s pussy here! Trump touched me through my underwear and I loved it!

    Seriously, ahem, Shackford may be better than most Reason staff on Russia but he is far from impartial.

    Russia is having economic problems, OK. Thankfully the US has not ever had that problem. Saudi Arabia is keeping the price of oil down, sends radical IMAMS to Russia to assassinate moderate IMAMS and cause terrorism, but hey, what of it? We broke our promise not to push NATO right up to Russian border but hey, that’s because Russia bad, America good! The liberal parties, one home grown, one astro turf, did not even get 3% of the vote to obtain public funding. Aside from Moscow and St Petersburg, where the REASON style cosmotarians live, the liberals got zero support.
    Russia could have taken Kiev in 2 weeks, but does not want Ukraine. Too many f**cking Nazis! The Crimea is happy, Russia built a bridge to unite them to federation. Even the majority of Tatars voted for United Russia! Russia could take Baltic states in a weekend, but does not want them. They do not allow Russians whose families moved there after 1941 to vote. Russia prevented a Christian and Alawite massacre by a limited intervention (an air brigade and a couple of ships offshore). No large military bases like US favors.
    The Turkish Stream gas pipeline will bypass Ukraine and export gas directly to Greece and the EU. Russian economy will recover. Meanwhile our crazed Neocons want WWIII. Killary will give it to them.

    1. Agreed. One of the most frustrating things about Reason is they have a tendency to jump on the Russian bashing bandwagon. All those things you said are true. Compared to the US in the last 15 years Russia has been positively non-interventionist, and we want to criticize? What hypocrisy. Russia has problems I’m sure but its freerer now than at ANY point in its history. Sanctions and warfare and cyber retaliation will only hurt Russian citizens and push it to a more authoritarian direction.

  30. So the VP and Hillary are both openly bragging about committing acts of war against Russia. Yet, somehow Trump is the dangerous irresponsible one.

    1. And we are threatening war over what is a “private” matter. This is the Dem party, not the US government.

      Since when did the Pentagon become an arm of the DNC?

      1. Around January 1, 2009?

        1. Jan 20. W wouldn’t cooperate.

  31. “The winter Olympics in Russia were an absurdly costly, cronyist affair for a country where average citizens suffer remarkably low standards of living. Critics of Putin tend to wind up dead. Yes, Putin’s hold over the media in Russia tends to help him withhold critical information from citizens, but you’d have to be na?ve to think Putin is in power simply because Russians don’t know the kind of guy he is.”
    Putin – Clinton – exactly who is described here?
    The real question is if Putin can take the election machine franchise from Soros.


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  33. I remember in the infancy of the intestines was a encryption program called PGP. But the guy whoade it got in trouble because he was considered exporting a weapon. If we didn’t have such disgustingly stupid fucking Top Men, this program could have been become the norm. But no, our stupid feckless govt has to be able to spy on it citizens

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  38. I honestly don’t get this.

    If a train in Moscow rolled over and hundreds died because some computer navigation system mysteriously went down, the Russian fury will be directed RIGHT at us. I mean, what are we gonna say? “Oh come on, we just wanted to reveal titillating pictures of your secretly gay politicians”? If we had to cyber their asses, then why announce it? Why have JOE BIDEN announce it?

    This isn’t the 1980’s, when the country was reliably anti communist. Now the country is ran by a bunch of malcontents, racialists, SJWs and standard issue socialists. If Russia hacked Wall Street and stole millions of dollars, half the country might say “Spasibo”.

    And it goes without saying that Russia will have a WAY easier time infiltrating American than vice versa. Our government gives government jobs to future jihadists.

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