Why Isn't Hillary Clinton as Popular as She Wants to Be?

Matt Welch discusses that plus Donald Trump's policing ideas on FBN's Kennedy tonight at 8 pm ET

Kennedy

On tonight's Kennedy (Fox Business Network at 8 p.m. ET, with a repeat at midnight), the host and her Party Panel (me, Michael Malice, Gillian Turner) try to help Hillary Clinton in understanding just why the poor dear isn't beating Donald Trump by 50 percentage points. (Hint: The answer, in part, rhymes with fig cat tire.)

Other topics that get bandied: Donald Trump's bizarre ideas about stop and frisk, the political fallout of the Charlotte mess, and North Korea's 28 websites.

Speaking of which, alert readers and viewers will note that my promised appearance last night on the Fox News program Red Eye w/ Tom Shillue stubbornly failed to materialize, due to breaking news situations. That should be corrected tonight, though who the hell knows!

Comments

[Karl Hungus]

Moderator Lester Holt: Secretary Clinton, how do you feel your many, many years of valiant, dedicated government have prepared you to serve as president of this deeply grateful nation? Followup question, do you feel, as many of us do, that in this instance, an actual election is a needless formality?

Clinton: Well Lester, as you know, when I singlehandedly liberated Libya from--

[camera flash goes off in audience; Trump operative seen making hasty exit from venue]

Clinton: I was able to . . . you know . . . Benghazi was . . . when the . . . Gadaffi's check to the Foundation didn't clear . . . SALAD SPOON!!!

[eyes roll back, drops to floor, bladder and bowels release, grand mal seizure to end all grand mal seizure commences]

[Hyperion]

I'll pay a lot to see that.

[Karl Hungus]

I'll pay a lot to see that.

I'll make a million-dollar bet that Trump's debate coaches have drummed it into his thick skull: if she faints, seizes, convulses, or has any other sort of medical episode, immediately rush to her aid. At that point, he wins in a landslide.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

If he provides CPR, I'll vote for him.

[R C Dean]

But not mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. Please, Cthulhu, not that.

[Karl Hungus]

But not mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. Please, Cthulhu, not that.

Just imagine . . . Trump administers CPR, saving her life. Flash forward to several days later as Obama, tears of rage welling up in his eyes, places the Presidential Freedom Medal around Trump's neck as the cameras click away . . .

[Heroic Mulatto]

You joke, but there's actually video evidence of Clinton falling to the floor and having a seizure.

[DOOMco]

Of course HM with the perfect video.

[Karl Hungus]

What in the name of fuck did I just watch . . .

[Heroic Mulatto]

What in the name of fuck did I just watch . . .

Truth. You've just watched truth.

[OneOut]

Im just happy I have the audio off as I watched TNF.

[Suell]

That was unbelievably hilarious. And also very disturbing.

[Agammamon]

https://youtu.be/CddMD3QqTFs

Look, there's nothing wrong with Hillary's health.

[Rothbard'sbitch]

No the story would be: Trump sexually assaults Clinton on debate stage while pretending to do CPR.

Hillary: It was horrible he wasn't doing chest compressions instead he was grabbing my breasts. And when he gave me mouth to mouth I swear I felt his tongue in there.

[Karl Hungus]

sexually assaults Clinton

Those three words would instantly and irredeemably render the story completely unbelievable.

[Bill Dalasio]

You don't do CPR on a seizure victim.

[Agammamon]

You do if you don't like the victim.

[Set Us Up The Chipper]

Just stay away from the Snuke

[Hyperion]

Lame! People are so retarded. If he laughs, says 'what the fuck, did granny just faint?', and then runs over an kicks her in the ribs several times, he's got my vote.

[BigT]

Trump: Is there a doctor in the house?

(Doctor rushes to the stage)

Trump: Doc, I'm having some digestion issues. What would you recomend?

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

" .. . did granny just faint? LOSER!"

[Homple]

I don't know about you, Mr. Hungus, but if my head was as thick as Trump's I'd be worth millions of bucks and married to a hot Central European model rather than writing anonymous internet comments.

[Karl Hungus]

I feel like I may have touched a nerve . . .

[Homple]

Nope, just my laugh reflex.

[JWW]

This one wins the internet for today...

[Karl Hungus]

Haha thanks, I'll try not to spend it all at once.

Let's see how well it goes over when I post it in the comments section of a HuffPo article.

[Hyperion]

No one can win an intertoobz now, Obama just gave it to China. Don't your read Drudge?

[Karl Hungus]

Obama just gave it to China

Which means I can probably buy it at Walmart then?

[Hyperion]

If it's not been looted of all the intertoobz yet.

[Hyperion]

The answer, in part, rhymes with fig cat tire

Reason.com, official home of racist bigot monsters. And fat shamers.

[JWatts]

"Hint: The answer, in part, rhymes with fig cat tire."

Pig bat shire?

Wig sat wire?

Mig mat mire?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Dig cat wire?

SIG hat fire?

Pig spat lyre?

[Hyperion]

Pig shat mire.

Pig shat fire.

Pig shat liar.

I'm going with Pig shat something, it seems fitting for the occasion.

[flye]

Dig that fire

[SusanM]

My answer for Hillary rhymes with "trucking stunt".

[simple man]

Big Shat Fire

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

"you suck" doesn't rhyme with fig cat tire, Matt

[XM]

Big fat liar

Where's my prize money?

[Hyperion]

Prize money? You're now in the basket of deplorables!

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

And in the wrong subthread.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

This is why the bitches shouldn't have guns. Amirite? Fellas? Amirite?

Tulsa police officer Betty Shelby will face charges in the shooting death of her brother Terrence.
"This is a small victory," Tiffany Crutcher told reporters. "The chain breaks here. We're going to break the chains of police brutality," she added. "We know the history."

Aside, no weapon found in the car.

[Hyperion]

But... he was a bad dude and she looks like such an all American hero and down home girl. And she has a cop get out of jail free card. Those are magical cards.

Is she the one who was yelling 'shots fired, shots fired!'?

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Is she the one who was yelling 'shots fired, shots fired!'?

B'leve so.

[MarkLastname]

Gotta admire someone who has the courage to narrate her own life.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Relevant:

Why We Need More Women Cops : LAPD: Studies have shown that they are just as effective as men, resort less to excessive force and have better people skills.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

They certainly have the "just as effective as men" part down. I'll give them that.

[straffinrun]

Makes sense. Yellin is very reluctant to pull the trigger.

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

She's given plenty of warnings, however.

[Ted S.]

Men just can't be bothered to put up with bullshit and are direct about it. Women act "polite" and then are catty backstabbers afterwards.

In brighter news, the two yentas who were in cubicles next to mine at work were both moved away to other cubicles in the latest cubicle reshuffle. Blissful peace.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Living their lives in noisy desperation?

[Eman]

That is the Jewish way

[Karl Hungus]

There's a meme I saw on Facebook a couple hours ago that shows a still from the aerial video clearly showing the driver's side window rolled all the up (with a snark caption about how reaching into a rolled-up window is kinda difficult). Could that have been faked? Sure, I suppose. But if that window was in fact up, her goose is cooked.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

And the fact that, you know, there was no gun.

However, in defense of the cop, that's never been a disqualifier.

[Karl Hungus]

How could there have been no gun? Somebody wasn't on the ball. Had she pissed off her superiors somehow? Questions abound!

[Hyperion]

Her goose is cooked? Is that what they call an extended paid vacation these days?

[Karl Hungus]

Her goose is cooked? Is that what they call an extended paid vacation these days?

No, this is serious business. All jokes aside, she's looking at an unpaid suspension. And we're not talking just a few days here, either. And it'll be at least a year before she's awarded back pay in arbitration.

[Hyperion]

Wow, that's rough stuff for shooting someone down in cold blood. I bet that'll teach em!

[Agammamon]

She might even need to transfer to another jurisdiction.

[R C Dean]

Interesting fact:

Multiple police cameras, including ones mounted in squad cars and in a helicopter, captured the Crutcher shooting on tape. In the video, Crutcher can be seen with his hands raised above his head prior to his death. He walks away from Shelby towards his car.

Panic fire. Pure and simple.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

I'm guessing that the quick indictment is because there simply was no explaining away the body cam footage.

I'm imagining a roomful of lawyers, including the family, watching the video, with the police chief and the union reps shifting in their seats uncomfortably, as a clearly unarmed man with his hands up and no weapon within 1000 miles is shot in the back.

I'm imagining the Union rep beginning to stutter about the video not being the entire picture, when the Union lawyer raises his hand at the union rep in a 'shut the fuck up' gesture, and starts negotiating with the family lawyer on a settlement.

[Hyperion]

The protocol is simple. Stack the jury with boot lickers. Easy peasy as pie.

[Deep Lurker]

No, waive a jury trial and be tried only by a judge.

[The Late P Brooks]

Why? It's a fekkin mystery, it is.

[The Late P Brooks]

Tulsa police officer Betty Shelby will face charges in the shooting death of her brother Terrence.

WTFSRSLY?

Was this a domestic dispute, or whut?

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

I believe I cut off part of the quote which referenced the sister of the man shot. I eliminated a participle or an object or a precursor or something those faggy booklearning literature types would know about. However, it looks like the CNN article has already changed in the minutes since I posted the link.

[The Fusionist]

To clarify that it's Trump's fault?

[Agammamon]

But really, aren't we all brothers and sisters in Christ?

[Hyperion]

Yes. The guy was involved in some domestic behavior. His car broke down and he was walking around outside his car. Then the fuzz pulled up, declared him a 'bad dude' and shot him dead. Nothing else to see here, move along now, comrade.

[Chipper-Shredder 2016]

Do they still have to declare you bad before shooting? I thought they could do that after.

[The Late P Brooks]

I believe I cut off part of the quote which referenced the sister of the man shot.

To be honest, I just assumed the CNN stylebook had been updated to '70s racespeak.

*Both shooter and dead guy are black, in this one, right? Or am I, as usual, diffused?

[Hyperion]

You'd better check the link. You're thinking of the Charlotte shooting. The only time BLM goes totally ape shit is when they shouldn't. Well, they shouldn't go apeshit period, but they can't even get their potential racism thing right.

[JayU]

Probably because her attempts at popularity are superficial inane bullshit?

Her appeal to latinos was "Call me your abuela."

Her appeal to black people was "I carry hot sauce around with me everywhere."

Her appeal to millennials was "Pokemon go to the polls."

What's next? She gonna appeal to Muslims by teaching a bomb making course?

[John C. Randolph]

I don't think there are enough Muslim republicans that she would have to worry about trying to woo them. Having that Wahabbi bedwench of hers is probably enough.

-jcr

[The Late P Brooks]

I was, in fact, wrong.

Again.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Don't beat yourself up over your refusal to use threading. Wrong? Sure. But let's try to move forward.

[R C Dean]

Why Isn't Hillary Clinton as Popular as She Wants to Be?

Because she is a vile sociopath, without the social skills to fool people otherwise?

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

Because of greed and hubris.

[straffinrun]

You're not up by 50 because Orange is the new Black.

[The Fusionist]

"Good evening, this is Alistair Cooke, and welcome to Monsters that Jump Out and Grab You Theatre. The most startling part is when they guy pays for his ice cream and he's using Canadian currency."

[C. Anacreon]

I have that same book about The Second City that the guy is reading at the end.

[The Late P Brooks]

As for Hillary- her laundry list of vapid talking points wrapped up with a "NYT opinion piece" bow ought to be patent nonsense to anybody smarter than a NYT commenter. This could have something to do with her lack of traction.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Again, she's the corporate candidate, and Millennials hate capitalism.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Or shorter: She's too libertarian.

[John C. Randolph]

Why Isn't Hillary Clinton as Popular as She Wants to Be?

Maybe because people don't respond positively to power-hungry harridans who believe they're entitled to the obedience of everyone she meets.

-jcr

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Gary Johnson is a nice guy and all but he will totally destroy the economy

Now, it's true that the Fed could print money instead but Johnson doesn't want the Fed to do that. He's said that quantitative easing, which is when the Fed buys bonds with newly created dollars, is just an attempt to "override the free market" that will only lead to "malinvestment, inflation, and prolonged unemployment." And since he would not only get to pick two Fed members in 2017, but also a new Fed chair in 2018, what he thinks matters.

The result, in all likelihood, would be a lot more unemployment. Start with how Johnson is proposing an immediate fiscal tightening of 3 percent of gross domestic product. Without any monetary offset from the Fed, that would hurt growth by, well, something like 3 to 4.5 percent of GDP. That's because there can be a multiplier on government spending. In other words, money that Uncle Sam doesn't pay you is money you don't have to pay someone else who, in turn, doesn't have money to pay another person. If we use the rule of thumb that every percentage point the economy grows less than it should adds half a percentage point to the unemployment rate, then Johnson's plan would probably push joblessness up somewhere around 6.5 to 7.25 percent.

[straffinrun]

Multiplier effect. Is there anything it can't do?

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

Government is perpetual motion machine.

[Ted S.]

The multiplier is less than 1.

[Chipper-Shredder 2016]

At times less than 0.

[Ted S.]

It's i-1.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

On a scale from 7-10, how retarded is Matt O'Brien?

[Ted S.]

12.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

If we use the rule of thumb that every percentage point the economy grows less than it should adds half a percentage point to the unemployment rate, then Johnson's plan would probably push joblessness up somewhere around 6.5 to 7.25 percent.

Jesus h Christ. I... ok... so... where to begin here.

So Matt, when two people love each other very much...

[straffinrun]

"Less than it should". Top Men say funny things. That whole article is a riot. Uh, I mean a protester.

[Sir Digby Chicken Caesar]

It's so cute when reporters think they're economists.

[Bill Dalasio]

So, any cut in spending means economic apocalypse. But, taxes don't mean a thing for the economy.

The imbeciles can't even get their own bankrupt theories down right.

And the empirical evidence (Taylor) is actually that the Keynesian multiplier is less than one.

[Ted S.]

OT: DJ Spank Spank has died.

Try to say that name ten times and keep a straight face.

[GILMORE?]

- 303

[The Fusionist]

"It's Alistair Cooke again, and welcome to another episode of OMG it's Coming to Get Me Theatre."

[The Late P Brooks]

Start with how Johnson is proposing an immediate fiscal tightening of 3 percent of gross domestic product. Without any monetary offset from the Fed, that would hurt growth by, well, something like 3 to 4.5 percent of GDP. That's because there can be a multiplier on government spending. In other words, money that Uncle Sam doesn't pay you is money you don't have to pay someone else who, in turn, doesn't have money to pay another person.

I want to bombard this person with flaming bags of dog excrement`.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Don't even bother, Brooks. O'Brien has written the Rosetta stone of economic retardation.

[John C. Randolph]

Say you did that, and he went running away to snivel in his safe space somewhere. There's plenty of useless wannabe Krugman larvae just like him waiting to take his place.

-jcr

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

Government spending? Where does government get this spending - did he forget that part?

How can there be a multiplier for government spending, when it taxes or borrows (which is deferred taxes).

[The Fusionist]

"Alistair Cooke again, doomed for a certain time to walk the earth, 'till all the crappy movies I introduced during my days of nature are burnt and purged away. But enough about me, time for another episode of This Totally Happened to this Guy I Know's Brother Theatre."

[dschwar]

I think this bit might work better if it was Stan Lee doing the intros.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Ugh, these Funny or Die videos are getting worse and worse.

[Ted S.]

So you vote Die?

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

BTW, not sure why this is creepy. I see this eight times a day where I live. Seriously. I just tell my daughter, "Whelp, one of your mom's people is having a tough day..." and we don't make eye contact.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Clinton progs harder, with proposed 65% on one of the most immoral taxes of all time.

http://www.cnbc.com/2016/09/22.....-rate.html

[Chipper-Shredder 2016]

Why not 165%?

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Why not just nationalize the banks and expropriate the wealth?

[Chipper-Shredder 2016]

And bill them for the manpower used in the seizure.

[Hyperion]

Kaine must be an almost unspeakable level of shitbag to be chosen by Clinton. Even Biden said he won't work in her administration even if offered and he's in the major league of douchebaggery.

[ant1sthenes]

Links to people sympathetic to Sandanistas, IIRC.

[ant1sthenes]

It's also possible that he is actually Cain.

[DOOMco]

I owned that person, and now I'm taking their stuff.

[C. Anacreon]

This article tries to come across as unbiased reporting.
But right in the middle of it the author decides to throw in a totally unsupported opinion on the relationship of taxes to revenue as a punch at Trump, but pretends that it's included as a fact.
You be the judge:

Trump has touted across the board tax cuts, which could balloon the national deficit,

[DOOMco]

Could, sure.

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

Government has a vested interest in seeing you die.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Prediction: Uh, looks like blue?

[Fist of Etiquette]

ReasonTV couldn't give Fox Biz a high def vid to use?

[The Fusionist]

"Alistair Cooke again...I'm trying to figure out which of my many quality short horror films you'd like to watch. Then I remember...it's H&R. So welcome to Scantily Clad Chicks in Peril Theatre. I'll be in my coffin."

[Ted S.]

You do realize how tedious this is getting, right?

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Antidote. (Song of the day)

[Ted S.]

Two mandolins for the win

[The Fusionist]

Hey, I *love* Vivaldi, thanks!

But if you're offering that as an implied rebuke to me...

"another well-known music joke concerns Vivaldi and goes like this: Vivaldi didn't really write five hundred concertos, he wrote the same concerto five hundred times! Bada-bing!"

[The Fusionist]

Sigh...I give and I give...

[GILMORE?]

I think i mentioned that to him once.

That was.... a few years ago.

[The Fusionist]

Tough crowd. 🙁

[GILMORE?]

In case any one needs more sources of derp, i think i found another motherlode =

http://www.trueactivist.com/

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

By 2050, the human population is expected to reach 9.7 million. In effect, securing affordable and eco-friendly housing will become a forefront issue for many citizens. Fortunately, a new solution to this dilemma was recently presented, and it is literally dirt cheap.

Huh?

[Hyperion]

In effect, securing affordable and eco-friendly housing will become a forefront issue for many citizens

Especially in SanFran. Feature, not a bug.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Malice continues to wear terrible things. Welch is a lavender wonder in comparison.

[Set Us Up The Chipper]

Does she float?

[The Fusionist]

"That reminds me...this is Alistair Cook, and welcome to Baby Sitters and Clowns Theatre."

[Ted S.]

Is she 99 44/100% pure?

[Fist of Etiquette]

There are just too many competing negatives for one to dominate Hillary's falter.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Are Welch and Turner both part of some violet wedding party?

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

Best man and maid of honor

[american socialist]

Why isn't Hillary Clinton as popular as she wants to be?

Oh, because people like facile answers to complicated questions and because some people, frustrated by decades of elitist politicians taking them for granted, think that they're sticking it to elitists by voting for a total douche plutocrat who gives out facile answers to complicated questions.

And there's the racism part. Do any of you want to argue that a significant minority of a Trump voters are motivated by animus towards Mexicans and Black people? If so, I'll be here all night.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Shorter: Republicans and libertarians are a bowl of skittles.

[Hyperion]

Basket of deplorable skittles.

[C. Anacreon]

That's pronounced "SKILLETS".

/Al Sharpton

[Hyperion]

I didn't axe Al how to pronounce it!

[SusanM]

It's because she's Richard Nixon in drag.

[BigT]

AmSuck: thanks for a facile answer to a complex question

[MarkLastname]

And some of Hillary's supporters hate men or white people. But those are the ok kinds of prejudice.

[GILMORE?]

Gillian Turner looks like a Stepford Wife
Michael Malice* looks like he gets haircuts @ a local marine corps base
Matt's going Blue-on-blue w/ Navy (?) suit
- my complaint about his way of doing this is that he doesn't really get enough contrast between the shirt-tie. I prefer a lighter-blue shirt & navy tie to this sort of thing, but its really just a matter of taste and not anything resembling mortal sin.

Noted = everyone's wearing blue. and the soundstage is littered in blue. Its creepy in the same way Breaking Bad used Marie Schrader's 'purple obsession' to insinuate her own internal psychological problems

[Ted S.]

Nel blu dipinto di blu

[GILMORE?]

*also: matt's hitler-youth haircut has gotten so high and tight i'm pretty sure he's going to have to eventually transition to a monocle and a cigarette holder to properly accessorize

[GILMORE?]

*speaking of mortal sins, check out Ron P's paisley throwback

also, note how Ron knows how to match a collar w/ a tie-knot. MATT. (hint hint) Full windsor isn't 100% necessary, but its certainly better than the schoolboy.

*Ron seems less crazy tonight than he has in the past.

I feel bad sometimes when they drag him out and them let him ramble for too long.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Breaking (or broken):

Carlos is in real danger this time.

Selfie-sending sleaze Anthony Weiner targeted a 15-year-old high school sophomore with his latest round of creepy internet come-ons ? and could now face hard time for his ceaseless sexting.

The pervy ex-politician's potential legal woes emerged after his cyber-squeeze of the past eight months was exposed Wednesday as an underage North Carolina girl.

Has anyone ever revealed the story on how Human and Weiner met?

http://www.nydailynews.com/new.....-1.2800788

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

*Huma*

[Hyperion]

Nothing will happen to him. Hillary will probably make him a czar of something even if it has to be made up out of thin air.

[Rhywun]

Sex-trafficking Czar, naturally.

[GILMORE?]

Has anyone ever revealed the story on how Human and Weiner met?

You mean there's not already a made-for-tv movie?

[GILMORE?]

*i'm pretty sure there was, wasn't there? a movie about Weiner and his political life (*maybe it was a doco)

[GILMORE?]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjN15MkJV6s

[Bodica Slayer of Woodchip]

Through Kristen Powers

[Fist of Etiquette]

SHUT UP WELCH AND MALICE AND LET THE CHICK TALK

[Ted S.]

Don't let Kennedy interrupt.

[The Fusionist]

OK, look, suggest a link (within reason) and I'll try and find it for you.

I'm the most democracy-supporting troll you're probably going to encounter on the Internet, so count your blessings.

[The Fusionist]

I'm sensing a lot of NOTAs.

[Hamster of Doom]

You're not a troll. You're just a little enthusiastic sometimes.

[Fist of Etiquette]

God, I forgot what I hated about < i The Independents. Too little time spent on any given topic.

[Ted S.]

Nice formatting.

[Fist of Etiquette]

It's a thing.

[jesse.in.mb]

Aww, that brings back memories!

*wipes away a tear*

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Nice meta alt-text Matt. I don't care what Gilmore says about your tie, you aight.

[Rufus The Monocled]

Whatever floats their boats.

http://www.theatlantic.com/vid.....urce=atlfb

So. If you were forced to live in a commune choosing from the ranks here, who would they be?

[Hamster of Doom]

Well, I'd damned sure pick the ones I know will ignore the rules about income sharing because Fuck Your Rules That's Stupid.

[Rufus The Monocled]

What happens if one of them fondles a child?

[Hamster of Doom]

We kill him, bury the body in the backyard, and drink expensive booze every year thereafter on his birthday.

[GILMORE?]

They call it a "commune" when its really just people choosing to live like a family. more or less. The female lawyer being the 'family breadwinner'. the rest are just adult-dependents.

[Rufus The Monocled]

How long before she figures out she has five kids?

[GILMORE?]

6 months

[Heroic Mulatto]

They call it a "commune" when its really just people choosing to live like a family. more or less.

I'm not trying to be glib, but what's the difference? What is a commune except a chosen extended family, basically?

[GILMORE?]

Maybe i'm picky because my high-school was sort of obsessed with "Communal Projects" and used to run annual field-trips down to one of the few successful communes in America

A proper "commune", IMO, is when everyone who's a member agrees to put 100% of their effort into the collective project. The commune "is the job". The output of that project is shared equally; and jobs are often rotated to ensure that everyone contributes in different roles.

When people all have lives/jobs doing some other career, they're basically blowing all their talents/time/energy on helping "someone else's business" succeed.

The point of a commune isn't to pool the money you happen to make doing different stuff: its to create a profit-generating enterprise out of the collective talents/abilities of its members, and then share the resulting resources generated equally.

I think the difference with a "family" is that its merely an 'obligation' to a random group of people. You must help sustain each other and volunteer time to aid one another, but its not like you're all putting your individual efforts into some shared enterprise. You're still looking out for #1 in terms of your pursuit of your own interests.

[Heroic Mulatto]

Fair point. The distinction being the point of a commune is communal labor. I can see that.

Or maybe just America's families need a little more Keaton in their lives.

[GILMORE?]

Basically. Sharing the "outputs" is one thing, but the fact is that everyone is putting their "inputs" (e.g. time, effort, labor) into completely different occupations, none of which actually contribute to the well-being of one another, is what makes this just a convenient living arrangement, and not anything truly "communal".

[Ted S.]

ENB and Jesse Walker.

[C. Anacreon]

ENB + Jesse Walker = jesse.in.mb

Right? I think I did the math correctly.

Of course, you have to invert the "W" to make each side balance.

[GILMORE?]

don't forget to carry the hipster, and then divide by the age difference.

[Fist of Etiquette]

There are no constitutional amendments protecting the right to possess military-style assault ties like the one Dr. Paul is using now to attack my eyeballs.

[Hyperion]

Eat some weed or go to jail?

I didn't finish reading this. I need to go back and find out if the cops were mad because the guy had to eat some weed that should have been theirs, or because he didn't go to jail.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Turner hasn't realized yet that the host is not going to brook any dallying in answers.

[Fist of Etiquette]

All of their websites are hosted by Geocities.

[Fist of Etiquette]

There's the door, a-holes. USE IT.

[The Fusionist]

Another spontaneously-generated story about how millennials shouldn't vote for Johnson

"Here we examine a few of Johnson's alarming stances and ties.

"1. Opposes federal guarantees for student loans....

"2. Opposes virtually all forms of gun control....

"3. Opposes the minimum wage....

"4. Opposes equal-pay laws....

"5. Opposes collective bargaining for public employees....

"6. Proposes cuts to Social Security and removing Medicare and Medicaid from federal control....

"7. Supports private prisons....

"8. Gave a sole-bidder contract to Koch Industries....

"9. May have Koch bidding for 2016 effort....

"10. Uses dirty tricksters....

"11. Accepted $1 million in PAC money from anti-education right-wing donor....

"12. Top corporate contributor slapped with $1.5 million pollution fine...."

[Sir Digby Chicken Caesar]

Good Lord, what a rancid site.

9. May have Koch backing for 2016 effort. The Daily Caller, a right-wing website, breathlessly reported in May

Yeah, tell us aaaalll about that breathless reporting, Ms. Stan.

[GILMORE?]

did they just copy-paste from Mother Jones?

oh, look, they're running something new about him =

Gary Johnson Wants to Ignore Climate Change Because the Sun Will Destroy the Earth One Day

[DOOMco]

Dear god, the comments.

[Sir Digby Chicken Caesar]

No, DOOMco, NO!!!

[DOOMco]

It's too late Sir Digby

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

I was expecting this.

[DOOMco]

darn, that would have worked well

[Crusty Juggler]

Gary Johnson uses Anansi?

[jesse.in.mb]

The trickster god?

[KWlib]

Because she's an evil fucking cunt?

[Rufus The Monocled]

Paging HM. Paging HM:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vt4Dfa4fOEY

[Heroic Mulatto]

Yes. I've used that both in a class and to taunt my wife.

This video by the same director is also good.

[GILMORE?]

This is how all languages sound to me

[Rhywun]

That reminds me of living in Germany and sometimes catching a Dutch radio station late at night - it sounds like complete gibberish mixed with frequent but brief stretches of perfectly clear English.

[The Fusionist]

Progressives warned that if North Carolina kept men out of the ladies' room and vice versa the state would suffer economically, and now it's happened

[Rufus The Monocled]

Crusty's mother at :54 seconds.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3Er0Ji_I7w

[The Fusionist]

Very nice, but what's with the 3 separate photos of Nicholas II goofing off?

Hey, Nick, go back to work, institute religious freedom and racial equality, stay out of war, and watch out for those Social Democrats.

[The Fusionist]

And try to avoid giving policymaking power to sketchy itinerant healers.

[Rufus The Monocled]

Considering his reign as Tsar wasn't exactly good...and then the commies came to get him.

[Rufus The Monocled]

For those who aren't sure what the link is it's a bunch of amusing Victorian pictures. Quite interesting.

[SIV]

Well now I've lost all respect for Instacuck.

[PapayaSF]

Eh, the original tweet was slightly over the line. His explanation and apology don't bother me.

[SIV]

No it wasn't and he's said as much before. I'm half joking because he only apologizes for "imprecise language" which seems really important to people who do law for a living.

[Buddy Bizarre]

That's the 'problem' with Twitter, thoughts too quickly expressed without reflection.

Of course, he should have written something along the line of "Don't stop your vehicle, move slowly & make them move out of your way".

[__Warren__]

I seem to recall that choking on a pretzel was a disqualification for being President. I'm glad we've moved past that old-fashioned standard.

[The Late P Brooks]

Here we examine a few of Johnson's alarming stances and ties.

Something something
An' the Gobble-uns 'll git you
Ef you
Don't
Watch
Out!

Say hi to the wolf for me.

*That's my new stock response to any and all "Teh Republikkkinz gwine gitcha, sho 'nuff, sho 'nuff!" jibberjabber.

[PapayaSF]

Has anyone ever revealed the story on how Human and Weiner met?

"Huma, you have done well with your task of spreading Islam in the United States. You are the proudest achievement of the Muslim Brotherhood. You successfully seduced the infidel demon Hillary, and pushed her Middle East policy in our direction, and help advance Obama's immigration plans. However, to successfully cover your mission, Allah requires an even greater sacrifice. You must enter into a sham marriage with a Jewish politician, a pervert."

"But..."

"Allah wills it. We need this to enhance your cover, to ensure that you stay with Hillary, in order to continue administering the tiny doses of the slow neurotoxin they made. The Russians tell us that she needs to collapse in the late summer or fall of 2016, before the election. Why they want it to be just then, I cannot imagine, but Allah's will is beyond our understanding, and sometimes requires temporary alliances with enemies...."

[Ken Shultz]

One of the reasons Hillary isn't as popular as she wants to be is because she took money from foreign governments while she was the Secretary of State.

Next question: Why wasn't Benedict Arnold as popular as he wanted to be?

[__Warren__]

Because he had a stupid dork name like a dork would have?

[Ken Shultz]

Yeah, I'm sure the treason had nothing to do with it.

What about the Rosenbergs? Why weren't they as popular as they wanted to be?

[Ken Shultz]

I went to school with guys named Catesby, Cameron, and Barkley.

They were very popular.

[The Fusionist]

What do you mean not as popular as he wanted to be, he had a great breakfast dish named after him!

[__Warren__]

The haddock omelette doesn't sound all that great.

[Troy muy grande boner]

Because she is an evil, murderous, pschopathic, mendacious, conniving cunt.

[Ken Shultz]

See, those are all negative qualities.

I could buy that.

Also, she took money from foreign governments while she was the Secretary of State.

[Eman]

A gender neutral person's reach should exceed his or her grasp

[Agammamon]

(Hint: The answer, in part, rhymes with fig cat tire.)

Not 'clucking punt'?