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Clinton SuperPAC to Spend Millions Shaming Millennials Out of Third-Party Voting, Electronic Billboard Ban Unconstitutional, Californians Want to Put Condoms on Porn Stars: A.M. Links

Elizabeth Nolan Brown | 9.16.2016 9:04 AM

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  • JUSTIN LANE/EPA/Newscom

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky, a strategist for Hillary Clinton SuperPAC Priorities USA.

  • A Swedish court says it won't suspend a rape investigation against Wikileaks mastermind Julian Assange.
  • Donald Trump told Dr. Oz yesterday that he supports making birth control pills available without a prescription.
  • Bans on electronic billboards are unconstitutional.
  • A USC/Los Angeles Times poll found 55 percent of respondents support a law forcing condom usage in porn films (and creating a state "porn czar" to oversee enforcement).
  • Local police departments are creating their own DNA databases. What could go wrong?
  • Janitors in California must receive anti-sexual harassment training under a new measure signed by Gov. Jerry Brown.
  • Four women say they were drugged and raped at a Washington State University Delta Upsilon party over the weekend, leading the school to suspend the fraternity.
  • Today's most subtance-free, hackery-heavy op-ed, for your hate-reading pleasure.
  • An Illinois woman is suing a sex-toy maker for invastion of privacy.

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Elizabeth Nolan Brown is a senior editor at Reason.

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  1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    Four women say they were drugged and raped at a Washington State University Delta Upsilon party over the weekend, leading the school to suspend the fraternity.

    Odds on it falling apart?

    1. WTF   9 years ago

      Yeah, given how previous such stories have played out, shouldn't we wait for some evidence first?

      1. Elizabeth Nolan Brown   9 years ago

        Evidence is patriarchy

        1. Tonio   9 years ago

          [golf clap]

        2. WTF   9 years ago

          Nice

        3. wef   9 years ago

          Very good. How's this?

          Evidence is patriarchy.
          Facts are sexism.
          Truth is misogyny.
          Abstract reasoning is objectification.
          Science is rape.

      2. Agammamon   9 years ago

        But we don't wait for evidence before condemning cops!!!11!!!11

        We should give the police the same benefit of the doubt until the evidence is released. Two or more years later. After people stop paying attention.

    2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      Hello.

    3. The Grinch   9 years ago

      1:1

    4. Ken Shultz   9 years ago

      Facts are beside the point when the truth is misogyny.

      Fraternities are in the basket of deplorables.

      1. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

        and just about every president since the invention of fraternities belonged to one

        1. Ken Shultz   9 years ago

          We might chalk this up to a consequence of out of control student loan lending, grants to universities, Title IX, etc.too.

          If a school insufficiently afraid of pissing off alumni and donors, something is out of whack.

          And I bet there are plenty of alumni from that fraternity that are plenty pissed off at the school right about now.

    5. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

      Friday Funnies:

      Picture, if you will, the 15th anniversary memorial of 9/11 held in Death Valley in the middle of August. A cardboard cutout of Hillary Clinton sweats profusely as the attendees listen to an unambiguously racist caricature of Barack Obama going on about the terrorist attack and how it's another reminder that the nation's gun laws are sorely lacking. Meanwhile Colin Powell is live blogging Bill Clinton's bimbo dicking of Jill Stein in the back row while Gary Johnson is on his smartphone struggling to load the eastern hemisphere on Google Maps. Donald Trump tweets out his admiration for the forceful, proactive thinking that went into Cash for Clunkers.

      1. Agammamon   9 years ago

        Picture, if you will, my stomach. See how trembles inside.

      2. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

        moar labelz

      3. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

        I'm not picturing enough labels.

    6. Free Society   9 years ago

      from the comment section

      RumBoy 18 hours ago
      Hmm many of these type of stories involve frat boys..why is that? Is something wrong with those dudes?

      Great point. What's wrong with fraternities that they routinely get wrongfully accused of rape by feminists and racialists?

      1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

        In fairness, we don't know that's what's happened here, and there have been cases of fraternity wrongdoing, but unfortunately all the times fratboys have been wrongly accused hasn't made anyone appreciate the need to hold off judgment for just a little bit.

        1. Free Society   9 years ago

          Of course we don't know what happened. But I'll wager that the purported victims will be in contact with one another and will coach one another to make their stories corroborate better, which basically spoils the integrity of their testimony. Maybe it did happen, but since false accusations are in vogue right now my conscience is clear to speculate like a speculating speculator.

          1. Cyto   9 years ago

            mmmm.... a conspiracy of four? That's a pretty big stretch. The other incidents have involved one person who concocted a story and several willingly duped super-believers who egged it on.

            Not impossible, but very unlikely.

            1. Free Society   9 years ago

              Yeah that just so unlikely it never happens. Except for Jian Ghomeshi, to name but one example of exactly that happening. Or maybe the numerous examples given by the Satanic Ritual Abuse panic in the 1980's?

              It happens and that's why it's important that witnesses not have contact with each other, if for no other reason than to not discredit themselves and allow their testimony to actually carry weight.

              1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

                I believe mattress girl was also a case of several getting together and, either on purpose or subconsciously, deciding that this Kraut they all dated was a masher.

                1. C. Anacreon   9 years ago

                  Wasn't the Ryan Lochte and olympic pals faking they'd been victims of an armed robbery four guys?

                  Maybe these giris were all part of some consensual group sex act, then suddenly realized the next morning they needed to cover their tracks before the whole school found out.

    7. NittanyCougar   9 years ago

      Crap...

    8. waffles   9 years ago

      It's amazing how often "drugged" is really the result of doing shots and having the alcohol hit like a truck. But since drunk women can't consent I guess there is enough here to ruin someone's life.

      1. waffles   9 years ago

        And since GHB clears the system, who can say? I guess that's the point though.

  2. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

    232) Yesterday, commenters in the Mourning Lynx were discussing the term Latinx, and somebody asked "How are sjws able to generate their bullshit jargon so quickly?"

    It got me thinking about other instances of instability in Progressive language: global warming -> climate change; gay-> gay and lesbian-> GLBT-> GLBTAKDQLFIASQ+ ; colored-> black-> African-American-> people of color.

    It reminded me at first of 1984, and the need to be ready at any instant to change your thinking to adhere to the new demands of state authorities. But I think that's too complicated.

    I think the real answer is more prosaic: progressive thought is based on feelings, not facts. Since emotions are ever-changing, exquisite standards of sensitivity growing ever more delicate, continuous change in language is necessary to reflect the turmoil of progressive inner life. Basically, progs treat language like clothes, ready to change into a new linguistic outfit whenever the emotional weather changes.

    1. lap83   9 years ago

      Basically, progs treat language like clothes, ready to change into a new linguistic outfit whenever the emotional weather changes.

      Also, someone pointed out that it's apparently an older term. So to continue your analogy, they cycle through linguistic trends like fashion designers do when they sample trends in clothing from previous decades

      1. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

        Good point. Same with colored/people of color

        1. Shirley Knott   9 years ago

          Well, and there was this little problem with black people in England and France being called 'African-American'.
          The Boers weren't really amused either.

          1. Paulpemb   9 years ago

            At one time, I was at a trivia competition and the moderator asked the question "Who was the first African-American President of South Africa?" When one of my opponents answered Nelson Mandela, I challenged them on the basis that South Africa has never had an African-AMERICAN President.

            That didn't go over well.

            1. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

              Bloody hell, nothing so enraging as pig-ignorant organisers of trivia

            2. WTF   9 years ago

              I think it was the London Olympics where the announcers were tripping over themselves trying to talk about the "African-American" British runner. Such idiocy.

      2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

        What brand would they be? The clothes. What brand of clothes are progressives?

        1. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

          Bad Idea Jeans

        2. Libertarian   9 years ago

          That's easy. Banana Republic.

          1. Suthenboy   9 years ago

            Winner.

          2. lap83   9 years ago

            yeah, that's a good one

        3. straffinrun   9 years ago

          Garanimals. They seem incapable of understanding colors.

        4. lap83   9 years ago

          Hugo Boss!

          1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

            Progressives are Hugo Boss?

            They ain't high end in my book!

            1. lap83   9 years ago

              Nazis...?

    2. Tonio   9 years ago

      You've got their number!

      1. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

        I've got your number too, Tonio. You're #1 in my book.

        1. Tonio   9 years ago

          Well-played, JATNAS. Happy Friday!

        2. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

          So using that as a cheesy pickup line. "I'd ask for your number, but I've got it already..." etc.

        3. C. Anacreon   9 years ago

          Obligatory.

    3. Don Escaped Texas   9 years ago

      It's just a version of spin....everyone does it

      Christians are "persecuted"
      We need to take our country back

      Weird little phrases imply facts that never were
      Change phrase as often as needed to alarm and reinvigorate the base

    4. carol   9 years ago

      I've always been bothered by the "people of color" thing. I'm a person of color. Thanks to my use of Effient I'm a lovely patchwork of purple, green and yellow with the occasional Florida brown thrown in. I'm not aware of anyone who is a person of color.

      1. carol   9 years ago

        *isn't*

        1. Johnny Hit n Run Paulene   9 years ago

          Yep. I tell people I'm a person of color too. The color is pink.

    5. Mike Laursen   9 years ago

      It's signaling of ethical superiority. When omen people, trying to be politically correct, too, start using your terminology you need to change it up so you can continue signaling your superiority.

      1. Mike Laursen   9 years ago

        Common people, although I kinda like omen people.

    6. BigT   9 years ago

      Mission creep in grievance culture.

  3. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Trump's enigmatic hair put to the test on US TV

    Fallon did his very popular impression of Trump's speaking style, ribbed him right and left and concluded his interview with a request.

    "Can I mess up your hair?" Fallon said.

    The comic explained that this might be the last time he could ask to do something unpresidential with Trump, lest he win election in November against Hillary Clinton.

    The crowd went nuts over the idea.

    Trump grinned and agreed.

    Fallon reached out with his right hand and mussed Trump's hair with a vigorous, repeated rub. The Republican nominee endured it with a broad smile.

    Trump, 70, has an elaborate hair-do centered on what seems to be an ambitious comb-over.

    Nothing fell off with Fallon's intervention but the result was not very pretty as Trump's long locks ended up pointing messily every which way.

    paging SugarFree!

    1. Bee Tagger   9 years ago

      Nothing fell off with Fallon's intervention but the result was not very pretty as Trump's long locks ended up pointing messily every which way.

      This reads like it's from a Beezus and Ramona book.

    2. WTF   9 years ago

      Little did Fallon know the Hair is actually sentient.

      1. SugarFree   9 years ago

        They had to pump it full of barbiturates so it didn't deglove Fallon's whole hand.

      2. Tyler.C   9 years ago

        The hair IS trump, the body is just a means to get around.

    3. Libertarian   9 years ago

      "Trump's long locks ended up pointing messily every which way."

      His hair didn't fall down, but it did look a little dehydrated.

    4. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

      One more insult to Conan O'Brien.

  4. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    Donald Trump told Dr. Oz yesterday that he supports making birth control pills available without a prescription.

    Prediction: It shan't be long before the GOP is fully pro choice.

    1. Bubba Jones   9 years ago

      Nonsense. This is all an elaborate plan to remove insurance coverage for bc pills.

      With easy access to birth control, what is the excuse for having abortions?

      1. Bee Tagger   9 years ago

        There are no elaborate political plans, ever.

        1. John DeWitt   9 years ago

          Our federal government more closely resembles Veep than House of Cards.

          1. Citizen X   9 years ago

            You know, Veep has turned out to be awfully prescient. I never would have thought the part of Hugh Laurie would be played by Tim "The People's Eyebrow" Kaine, but there you go.

            1. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

              "That fucking guy, with his fucking charm, and his fucking son, in his fucking wheelchair, with his spine all fucked up!"

          2. WTF   9 years ago

            Hillary is just a much less attractive and much more corrupt version of Selena Meyer.

            1. Citizen X   9 years ago

              I wonder who's the real-life equivalent of Jonah Ryan? If Matthew Yglesias suddenly, mysteriously decides to run for Congress, i guess we'll know.

              1. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

                Jonad's way too alpha for someone like Yglesias.

                1. Citizen X   9 years ago

                  That didn't protect him from getting molested by Teddy.

                  1. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

                    Check 'em, don't neglect 'em

          3. CatoTheChipper   9 years ago

            Veep is fiction.

            There is no way the the federal government is as enlightened and as competent as it is portrayed in Veep.

            Thomas Massey is right about House of Cards:

            People ask me, "Is House of Cards realistic?" I tell them, the similarities are uncanny. The furniture, the phones, the drapes, the scandals, the back room deals... it's all firmly based on reality. But if you must know, there's one huge difference between House of Cards and real-life Congress... "In House of Cards, there's a guy with a plan."

            1. BigT   9 years ago

              I watched one episode of Veep and the urge to vomit still occurs every time I hear that word.

      2. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

        The Dems will never back it, though, because Planned Parenthood gets a lot of money from the status quo and has come out in opposition. Even though, you know, it actually is good for the causes they purport to represent.

        1. spqr2008   9 years ago

          And that's why these Republicans support it, and why it's a good idea. You can't tell me that if Planned Parenthood didn't have to write scripts for Birth Control, it could then survive by being funded privately (which it could anyways, if George Soros wasn't being such a cheap shit).

        2. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

          I like breaking Blue Tribe brains on the subject of Planned Parenthood.

          I begin with the statement "Healthcare is a vital service that everyone needs. Therefore, we should just give a lot of money to a private organization that's in the business of healthcare to make sure everyone has access to healthcare."

          The next step is to endure the myriad explanations about how private organizations are bad and greedy and how my idea is terrible that will then issue forth from the mouth of the Blue Tribesman, agreeing and nodding sagely at each one.

          Then, bring up Planned Parenthood...

      3. Tonio   9 years ago

        You will also see a push for BC pills to be provided for free, just like the push for free menstrual supplies.

        1. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

          Not giving is "denying access"! Why do you hate, womynz, Tonio?

          1. Tonio   9 years ago

            Because they get the lion's share of the cock, and all the cute shoes. Duh.

            1. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

              On behalf of all women ever, #sorrynotsorry

              1. Citizen X   9 years ago

                Steel-toed boots* in women's sizes are considered cute in Australia, of course.

                *for kicking drop bears out of the way

                1. Chip Woodier   9 years ago

                  I went through puberty in the 70's so...
                  +1 for teen girls in combat boots.

    2. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

      OTC birth control is a good policy, and more drugs should move in that direction.

      1. robc   9 years ago

        Maybe we can get OTC drugs allowed to be purchased with HSA dollars if this passes.

      2. Tonio   9 years ago

        ^This. It will be amusing to see how the conflict between the feminists and the doctors' lobby plays out.

        1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

          What conflict? As far as I know, feminists are mostly against OTC BC. One feminist friend, a pro-choice activist who worked in a women's health (eg abortion) clinic and now does community outreach, made a weak-tea pitch for keeping it prescription because it's simply too potentially harmful and women must consult with a physician before going on the pill, plus they might not know all of their options. Got that? Girls as young as twelve should have unfettered access whatever their parents say, but grown women must be required to speak with a doctor. And no, that's not at all paternalistic, because reasons.

          Of course the real reason, at least in her case but probably generally as well, is because it's something Republicans have taken up and therefore must be opposed.

          1. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

            Of course the real reason, at least in her case but probably generally as well, is because it's something Republicans have taken up and therefore must be opposed.

            This is a big part of it. Another aspect, though, is that Planned Parenthood gets a lot of its money from birth control, and making it OTC would lower the price and make it more available

            1. Paulpemb   9 years ago

              Well, if birth control was more accessible and more affordable, women might start getting silly ideas like they don't need the government to provide it to them.

              1. CatoTheChipper   9 years ago

                Julia would never entertain such silliness.

          2. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

            ie, not eg

            1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

              Correct.

      3. Jerryskids   9 years ago

        Prescription drugs are free, though. OTC means you gotta pay for them. Of course, you're a libertarian shitlord who hates women and black people so you enjoy stealing shit from them.

        1. thom   9 years ago

          Can't it be both? Aren't doctors able to prescribe ibuprofin, for example, and then it is covered under prescription drug coverage? I swear that's happened to me.

    3. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      I hope someone called Planned Parenthood for a quote.

  5. Citizen X   9 years ago

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky, a strategist for Hillary Clinton SuperPAC Priorities USA.

    Shut the fuck up, Justin Barasky.

    1. WTF   9 years ago

      "Those are Hillary's votes! They belong to HER!!!1!!!!!!"
      This of course is why the left has tried to destroy Johnson over things like the "Aleppo" gotcha.

      1. Quo Usque Tandem   9 years ago

        "Aleppo" got "Trumped" by "Illary's" "deplorables" and I don't think the general electorate remembers it much any more.

      2. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

        Johnson is drawing more from Hillary than from Trump and therefore Hillary's surrogates in the media must destroy him.

        1. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

          no need for superPac spending, just let Gary debate. He'll take care of the rest

          1. thom   9 years ago

            They're betting that the exposure would have more impact than the inevitable incompetence. My guess is that both big campaigns assume Johnson is polling so low because most of the voters aren't aware of him. Being a dimwit long ago ceased being a barricade to the presidency. If enough Americans are able to tell themselves, "well, this dimwit seems somewhat reasonable", it might give him a serious shot.

            1. BigT   9 years ago

              Um...Rick Perry?

    2. Joe M   9 years ago

      I find this so hilarious. Republicans saying a vote for Johnson is a vote for Clinton. Democrats saying a vote for Johnson is a vote for Trump. Here's an idea: a vote for Johnson is... wait for it... a vote for Johnson. Nutty, I know.

      1. John DeWitt   9 years ago

        Nutty Johnson. Former president Bimbo Dickens can barely contain his laughter.

        1. Joe M   9 years ago

          You can say that again.

          1. BigT   9 years ago

            Dickon Bimbos!

      2. John DeWitt   9 years ago

        Nutty Johnson. Former president Bimbo Dickens can barely contain his laughter.

        1. Citizen X   9 years ago

          Mike M., is that you?

    3. John DeWitt   9 years ago

      So, looks I AM voting for Trump then.

    4. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      Here's the attention-worthy part:

      multimillion-dollar digital campaign

      Millennials are more likely to me cable cord-cutters who get their news online.

      HRC is doing very poorly with that cohort.

      Therefore, they are going digital with this campaign.

      1. Jerryskids   9 years ago

        Digital campaign. Do I even need to ask which specific digit they're holding up?

    5. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

      Fuck off slavers. My vote is only going to someone who deserves it. Voting isn't strategic, it's a moral choice.

      1. Agammamon   9 years ago

        Its not a moral choice any more than deciding which air conditioning repairman to call when the AC needs maintenance.

        its strictly a pragmatic choice

        1. You *have* to participate because 51%+ of the vote is enough to justify killing you and/or taking everything you own. Even if only 1% of the population bothered to cast a ballot.

        2. You're not electing angels or anything. Nor is your vote an endorsement of every position a candidate holds. Its simply that, of the people applying for the job, one of them will do the job best. You can think they're all unqualified, unfortunately leaving the job unfilled is not an option.

        1. Homple   9 years ago

          I like the air conditioner repairman analogy. One could make a case that conflating politics with morality is a major cause of fuckedupedness in the way things are run.

        2. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

          >ts not a moral choice

          Yes it is. It's choosing how force should be used. Everything else you said is irrelevant.

          1. kbolino   9 years ago

            It's choosing how force should be used.

            Do you have a lot of referendums where you live? In most cases, you're voting for a person, not a position. You choose who gets to wield force, directly or indirectly, not how the force is wielded per se.

    6. Mr. Flanders   9 years ago

      It's funny, because if I wasn't voting for Johnson I'd be voting for Trump, so if what HRC's campaign said is true, than my vote for Johnson just became more valuable to me.

    7. Red Rocks Okey-Dokein   9 years ago

      "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign

      Thanks goodness Democrats got the big money out of politics!

  6. Bee Tagger   9 years ago

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky

    Keep your fingers away from me, Justin.

  7. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

    ""We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky, a strategist for Hillary Clinton SuperPAC Priorities USA."

    Those votes belong to us! Voting for a third-party candidate is the same as stealing!

    1. Joe M   9 years ago

      Really we should just let the government equitably distribute votes based on party-affiliation of currently elected politicians. It's the only way to be fair.

  8. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Home on the playground? Burros roam onto Phoenix-area school

    Staff members spotted four burros walking onto the playground of Vistancia Elementary in the city of Peoria on Thursday morning.

    Peoria Unified School District spokeswoman Erin Dunsey says employees saw the burros enter the grounds through a parking lot. The animals then went to the playground and left through a side gate.

    Dunsey says the burros were there only briefly and before any students had arrived. Nobody was hurt.

    Peoria police spokesman Brandon Sheffert says authorities received a call about burros running on a golf course and believes they were the same animals.

    I blame you open-boarder zealots

    1. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

      They only wanted to go down the slide.

    2. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

      What the fuck is a burro? Talk English er git out!

      1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        It's a mini-burrito, no sauce.

        1. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

          Wouldn't it be an extra large burrito?

          1. Brett L   9 years ago

            Forget it, he's rolling.

        2. Mike Laursen   9 years ago

          If you try to appropriate culture and totally botch it, does it count?

      2. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

        Ass.

      3. Brett L   9 years ago

        Jackass.

        1. BigT   9 years ago

          Democrat!

    3. Agammamon   9 years ago

      Are they sure it wasn't some local Phoenix pols walking around glad-handing? I understand those guys often get mistaken for asses.

    4. (((Renegade)))   9 years ago

      I blame you open-boarder zealots

      We had a boarder when I was a kid. Try as I did, I still couldn't get her to open. She complained to my parents. It did not go well for me.

  9. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

    Iowa high school basketball team featured on controversial Native American-themed poster

    Clarke (Osceola, Iowa) High School's mascot is the Indians. That doesn't mean the school should appropriate Native American culture.

    The Clarke girls' basketball team got ready for its upcoming season by having a photographer create a poster titled "Tribal Family." It features the players wearing cultural headgear and silhouetted in what appears to be a tribal dance. (Oh, and the schedule is on the bottom.)

    1. WTF   9 years ago

      "Cultural appropriation" is about the stupidest fake moral outrage going. It's so idiotic I can't believe some people even take it seriously.

      1. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

        Still, internet shaming teenage girls is less important than cultural appropriation.

        1. Mike Laursen   9 years ago

          Actually, it's not. It's just that SJWs are incapable of discerning conflicting concepts.

      2. Tonio   9 years ago

        It will be interesting to see how that plays out this Halloween season. I suspect it will go into overdrive this year as a proxy for the presidential campaign.

        1. Free Society   9 years ago

          The way things are shaping up, I might have to go in blackface again.

      3. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

        Nah, WTF, don't you see? Those girls stole Indian headgear! Now Indians can't use it again ever!!! It's been appropriated, man! Culturally appropriated!

      4. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

        I've sort of looking forward to the conflict between cultural appropriation and integration. "HEY! You Arabs can't wear a business suit. That's white culture! You can't appropriate it! Keep wearing your burkas and turbans." I suspect it will just continue to be ignored as a double standard by the progressives, but if not it could be a fun thing to watch them try to grapple with.

        1. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

          You may not have noticed, but proggies are generally opposed to integration these days. We should all constantly be divided up into tribes and pitted against each other. Our only commonality is our hatred for the whitecisheteropatriarcy.

          1. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

            I thought it was the melting pot that made America so great.

      5. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

        The sad thing is "cultural appropriation" is one of the most beautiful things on the earth. It's always interesting to see one culture take another's artistic styles and interpret them in their own way.

        The Japanese took cinema and combined their own kabuki theater traditions to make the samurai film genre. America took samurai film tropes and adapted them into the Western genre. Koreans took the Western genre and made "The Good, the Bad, and the Weird", one of my favorite movies. A huge result of cultures sharing and exchanging with one another to bring forth that movie.

        Or another of my favorite movies, Juan de los Muertos, a Cuban comedy inspired by the zombie movie genre (featuring an inept Cuban government that brushes off concerns about rampaging zombie hordes as being "American dissidents").

        Or my favorite musical genre, Mongolian hip hop, where they've taken an originally African American art form and combined it with traditional Mongolian instruments and throat singing.

        Just, how can someone look at many different cultures with different beliefs and ideas all coming together to bring forth a work of art inspired by all of them and think anything negative about that happening...??

        1. mojoe   9 years ago

          Actually, Kurosawa was inspired to make some of his best Samurai stuff from watching John Ford's Westerns, who in turn inspired Leone's Spaghetti Westerns (which were mostly made in Spain and Italy). It really does come full circle.

        2. BigT   9 years ago

          "The sad thing is "cultural appropriation" is one of the most beautiful things on the earth. "

          Monkey see, monkey do.

          Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

    2. OBJ FRANKELSON   9 years ago

      Paging Injun, we need some South Asian moral indignation over here, Native Americans appropriating the word Indian from an Italian who was sent by the Spanish and made a mistake... sounds like appropriation all the way down.

      1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        *shakes fist in the air*

        Sacrilege! Outrage! I feel appropriated.

        Speaking of appropriation, I recently looked into word roots recently and was amazed by how English vocabulary has absorbed words from Indian languages over different periods of time. There is a proto-Indo-European set of words, and another set from the past 400 years. Likewise, Indian languages have absorbed quite a bit from English too.

        It's mutual appropriation all the way down.

        1. Free Society   9 years ago

          proto-Indo-European set of words

          The vast majority of the vocabulary is derived from the proto-Indo-European language, in all of it's daughter languages. That was like six thousand years ago when our mutual (linguistic) ancestors were the same people living far north and west of India.

          1. spqr2008   9 years ago

            Lithuanian apparently has more in common with Southern Asian languages and ancient tongues than it does with anything else. I thank God for that, because translation was my great grandfather's ticket to a post with the Russian Embassy to the U.S. in the late 19th Century, and he escaped the post to become an American.

        2. Suthenboy   9 years ago

          English is kind of unique in the way it was originally formulated. Heroic Mulatto would no doubt have better recommendations but if you are interested here is a good read:

          http://www.amazon.com/Wide-Waters-Eng.....0142000590

          Also, English speakers, especially Americans, love adopting words and phrases from other languages. And food. We love adopting other cultures foods.

          1. Brett L   9 years ago

            Have you tried English cuisine? Its a matter of survival.

          2. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

            "We love adopting other cultures foods."

            Honestly, that's the best thing about American cuisine.

            It takes in ideas from everywhere else, takes what works, and tries mixing and matching those ideas with other ideas from different places. The results aren't always great, but the good ones become popular and tend to rise to the top.

            American cuisine is like the most free market thing about American culture.

          3. Free Society   9 years ago

            What I think is even more interesting than the influence of the King James bible was the tremendous, but far lesser known influence of the Anglo-Saxon bible which was one of the first bibles to be translated into a local European language. The relative independence of the English church contributed directly to the Pope giving his blessing for William the Conqueror's expedition to take England and bring their church to heel. A blessing that basically paved the way for William like nothing else could.

        3. Agammamon   9 years ago

          No, no, no - Indian languages had English *forced upon* them by nasty colonialists. While English has *stolen* from other cultures.

        4. OBJ FRANKELSON   9 years ago

          Right! Its almost like any given culture is almost entirely composed of practices appropriated from other cultures.... *stares and blinks pointedly*

      2. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

        Everyone knows Indians don't call themselves Indians. In their language they're South Pakis.

        1. Lee Genes   9 years ago

          *readies self for flying nukes*

        2. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          Real story from when I was a student.

          I had a Pakistani kid in one of my classes. The professor was reading out students' names and handing them assignments. When he read the Pakistani kid's name, there was no response. So he said, "Does anyone know who xxx is?"

          A Romanian classmate said, "He's that Indian guy over there."

          My Pakistani classmate's snapped back: "I'm NOT Indian." 🙂

          1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

            "Figures a Hungarian would get it wrong."

            1. OBJ FRANKELSON   9 years ago

              Nah if you want to get under an Eastern European's skin refer to them as Russians, works every time. Except for Serbians, who might take it as a compliment...

              1. Juice   9 years ago

                I did it one time to some Polish friends. I was just fucking with them. They took it very seriously. I thought I was about to get my ass kicked. I probably would have if I hadn't apologized.

        3. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          Injun's guide to distinguishing between Indian and Pakistani grocery stores and restaurants.

          An Indian grocery store or restaurant will definitely say "Indian grocery" or "Indian restaurant".

          A Pakistani business will say "Indo-Pak grocery" or "Indo-Pak restaurant".

          If you're in an Indian neighborhood next time, keep an eye out for this.

          1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

            Well, now I know what I'm doing for lunch. Thanks, Injun!

            (I tried preparing biryani a few nights ago. Not bad, but I think I lack the palette to fully appreciate the dozen spices involved. Ground cardamom and pods? Couldn't taste it.)

            1. Jerryskids   9 years ago

              A few years back there was a Korean family that moved into a little town just south of here and promptly opened a Chinese restaurant. In a nod to southern cuisine, they offer a selection of deep-fried foods, all of it dipped it tempura batter. Nothing says America like southern-fried Japanese-style Chinese food cooked by a Korean.

  10. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump...

    When you have their candidate, this is pretty much all that campaign can hang its hat on.

  11. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

    Fenriz from Darkthrone is now an accidental politician

    1. Private Chipperbot   9 years ago

      Wow! This is the first I've heard of this. 😉

  12. Citizen X   9 years ago

    A USC/Los Angeles Times poll found 55 percent of respondents support a law forcing condom usage in porn films (and creating a state "porn czar" to oversee enforcement).

    BRB, updating my resume.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

      Also, LA residents think all vehicles in movie car chases should follow the posted speed limits.

      1. Brett L   9 years ago

        Why would they be the only vehicles going the speed limit?

    2. straffinrun   9 years ago

      Porn Kaiser sounds better. I got a helmet for that.

      1. Citizen X   9 years ago

        Pickelhaube with a dildo on top, right?

        1. straffinrun   9 years ago

          That would make him Vlad the Impaleher.

        2. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

          So does this guy

          1. straffinrun   9 years ago

            No view and only the aroma. Hmmm. How much is it?

        3. End Child Unemployment   9 years ago

          STD circumnavigational dildo helmets, because you can'ts bes too careful.

      2. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

        "I got a helmet for that."
        Is it purple?

    3. OBJ FRANKELSON   9 years ago

      So, Chodder Boy for porn czar, then?

  13. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    For CJ:

    How one grandmother's frilly pants sparked a furious village row

    Her crime? Hanging her frilly underwear on a washing line.

    The audacious behaviour from Rozamun Perrin, who dared to dry a pair of her own knickers on a washing line above her patio, has sent Stokeinteignhead into a tailspin.

    One resident even sent her a poorly-spelt note, in anger.

    It reads: "It is total inapropriate [sic] for this type of garment to be displayed opposite the village primary school. There are member of this community that would welcome a halting of this. Thank you."

    The missive was posted through her letterbox along with a pair of Perrin's black frilly pants.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

      "One resident even sent her a poorly-spelt note, in anger."

      She sent a note with bad grain on it? Harsh.

      1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

        The grain isn't bad, it just feels unwell.

    2. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

      "WE, THE GOD-FEARING CITIZENS OF STOKEINTEIGNHEAD wish to express our extreme displeasure with your choice of undergarments. Please remove them immediately! The fact that you have hanged them there just goes to prove that you are the leading asshole in the state!"

      1. The Grinch   9 years ago

        Matthew, Mark, Luke, and duck!

    3. Citizen X   9 years ago

      "Furious village row" is the euphemism to beat today, folks.

    4. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      I don't participate in GILF shaming.

      1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

        Crusty drives his GILFs home the morning after. It's just common courtesy.

    5. Isaac Bartram   9 years ago

      I wonder how the locals pronounce "Stokeinteignhead".

      I'm sure it's nothing like the way it's spelled.

      1. Isaac Bartram   9 years ago

        OOps, According to Wikipedia, it's pronounced exactly the way it's spelled.

        I pictured the typical English habit of reducing multi-syllable words down to two.

  14. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

    Public Masturbation Is Legal in Italy, Highest Court Rules

    1. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

      Diogenes the Cynic approves.

      1. A Cynic's Guide to Zen   9 years ago

        "Stand out of my light, you're blocking my view of the bathhouse...."

    2. Citizen X   9 years ago

      Crusty hopped a red-eye to Roma this morning.

      1. Chip Woodier   9 years ago

        Ok...now this doesn't even seem like a euphemism.

    3. straffinrun   9 years ago

      I'm gonna take a selfie in front of the Monument to Agrippa.

    4. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      Repeating my line about this: for many Italian men it is either masturbate in public or masturbate in the house the share with their mother. The choice is simple.

      1. Brett L   9 years ago

        Move to New York and become a bum?

      2. Citizen X   9 years ago

        Psh. Every teenage boy in the world has figured that one out.

    5. Mr. Flanders   9 years ago

      Now all Italy needs are some free internet Wi-Fi kiosks.

    6. Juice   9 years ago

      I think it was also ruled legal in Canada. Could be mistaken though.

      1. Citizen X   9 years ago

        Who'd be able to tell under all those layers?

  15. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

    Every character in Stranger Things portrayed by pugs

  16. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    Janitors in California must receive anti-sexual harassment training under a new measure signed by Gov. Jerry Brown.

    Who hasn't felt a mop handle where it doesn't belong?

    1. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

      Will the NYPD be getting the same training?

    2. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      Female custodians are frequent targets of sexual harassment, and not just from co-workers.

      1. Citizen X   9 years ago

        Can't help yourself when you see that enormous set of keys, huh?

      2. straffinrun   9 years ago

        Old woman here come in and clean the men's room while it's full of men at the urinal do their business. They must get raped all the time I'm thinking.

      3. WTF   9 years ago

        You speak from experience?

  17. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    These Eagles Snatch Hostile Drones from the Sky

    Michel Baeten, an operational manager for the DNP, told news agency Agence France-Presse (AFP) that using birds of prey is one of several methods Dutch police employ to combat drones, alongside electromagnetic pulses and laser technology.

    Baeten called eagles "one of the most effective countermeasures against hostile drones," the AFP reported.

    So, what drones might be considered "hostile"? These aerial vehicles could be a threat, for instance, to visiting diplomats, as the DNP demonstrated Sept. 9 in a mock "attack." In the department's test setting ? enacted on video ? a man playing a VIP emerged from a motorcade at a public location. As he greeted people, a drone flew toward him, and it was quickly intercepted by a trained bird.

    The eagle-eyed trainees are taught to see drones as prey and respond accordingly, officials said in the statement. Just as eagles capture prey and bring it to their nests, the trained eagles not only disable the drones but also relocate a safe distance from crowds.

    Not only do I need my bodyguards, the wall of orphan shield, and a war wagon, but eagles. *takes out checkbook*

    1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

      I saw that on "outrageous acts of science". It's pretty neat.

    2. Tonio   9 years ago

      Pepperspray-equipped drones will shut that shit down real quick. Of course the extra payload will reduce operating range, etc.

      1. Tonio   9 years ago

        Or, ultrasonic sound-cannon. Probably lighter and harder to detect same basic hardware as ultrasonic rangefinder and the offensive capability could be hidden in software.

        1. Tonio   9 years ago

          ...lighter and harder to detect than a cannister of pepperspray...

      2. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        *adds Mexican eagles to the list*

        1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

          Some of them, I assume, are good birds.

      3. Libertarian   9 years ago

        "Countermeasures" deployed by drones to defeat organic threats. Gotta love the 21st century.

        Perhaps the drones could drop live mice as decoys.

        1. Chip Woodier   9 years ago

          I think it'd be easier to come up with a swarm of drones than a swarm of trained attack eagles.

    3. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

      Sounds like a cheap Avatar knockoff.

  18. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

    Probably already posted...

    After months of complaints from residents, businesses and other elected officials, Mr. de Blasio, a Democrat, conceded that combining unfettered internet access with free Wi-Fi was a recipe for bad behavior...

    Users were expected to make short stops at the kiosks. But the sites quickly attracted homeless people and other idle users who took full advantage of the unlimited access to the internet to turn the kiosks into al fresco living rooms, watching movies and playing music for hours... He said he had observed people watching pornography on the kiosk screens with children nearby.

    1. Derp-o-Matic 5000   9 years ago

      I can't seem to find my shocked face....

    2. Libertarian   9 years ago

      This is a cliche of a progressive government program.

      1. Think of something that appears to be new, hip, and cutting edge.
      2. Use tax dollars to provide something that almost anyone can easily get already.
      3. Roll out 400 expensive examples all at once, rather than installing a couple dozen as a test.
      4. Unintended consequences.
      5. Scramble and ask for more money to fix the problem.
      6. Go back to #4.

      1. thom   9 years ago

        The issue is that they just can't consider that other people are not like them. They would use these as convenient places to quickly check their email or something. That other people would do something different never crosses their mind until it's too late. (And then, usually, they focus on how to punish or somehow control those people).

    3. Suthenboy   9 years ago

      Surprise! Socialist program turns out like all other socialist programs ever.

      1. Mr. Flanders   9 years ago

        With people jerking off in public?

        1. Citizen X   9 years ago

          That's the best-case scenario.

    4. Agammamon   9 years ago

      Posted last night - but to repeat my comments:

      They spent umpteen million dollars to but these in, in 2016 where a smartphone is . . . its really hard to find *not smart* phones nowadays.

      They replicate the functionality of a smartphone - which pretty much everyone has - so, of course, the only people using it are the bums that can't afford their own phone. And these guys are doing what everyone else with access to the internet is doing, checking out porn and masturbating.

  19. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky, a strategist for Hillary Clinton SuperPAC Priorities USA.

    I would never in my life vote for him, but we're actually in a situation where Donald fucking Trump might be the least repugnant of the major party candidates. That should not be possible.

    1. Quo Usque Tandem   9 years ago

      As least repugnant goes, between the two, it is indeed a low bar for the ages.

      Personally I'm rather happy that the Johnson Live Free sticker on my rear window will be especially annoying to any idiot who intends to vote for Hilldog. But push come to shove I have to agree, Trump is slightly less odious.

      My fondest approaching para reality hope is that Johnson will at least take just enough votes to fuck up the whole business where no one gets a sufficient majority [270 electoral votes] to take the election and it gets kicked to the House per 12th Amendment rules. Of course Johnson would actually have to win a State, or even two, for that to happen so it remains largely a dreamland vision.

      But just imagine how that would play out. Given the Republican majority there ain't no f'n way Hilldog could walk, or hobble, away with it, and Trump being so odious to establishment Republicans, I could actually see Gary getting the office given the choices.

      1. Eric L   9 years ago

        "But just imagine how that would play out. Given the Republican majority there ain't no f'n way Hilldog could walk, or hobble, away with it, and Trump being so odious to establishment Republicans, I could actually see Gary getting the office given the choices."

        Remember, though, if it goes to the House, each state delegation gets one vote; not each member. So, California gets one vote just as North Dakota gets one vote. Plus, it will be the incoming members (not the current members) who would decide. So far it does not look like the Republicans will loose many seats in the House this coming election. You need to look at the state delegations not just the overall majority. It is possible that Hillary could be chosen under those circumstances.

        1. Gadfly   9 years ago

          The current house delegations are 33 Republican dominated, 14 Democratic dominated, and 3 tied. If it went to the house (the most likely situation in which this would happen would be if there was a faithless elector in a close race, as Johnson isn't on track to come close to winning a single state), then the Republicans would get to choose the next president without consideration of or compromise with the Democrats and it is highly unlikely that they would abandon Trump in favor of Johnson.

  20. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    DHS accused of sitting on damning border report as immigration issue drives presidential race

    DHS denied it is holding back the report, but sources say it was completed in November and that it shows roughly half of adults who attempt to cross the border make it - approximately 250,000 in total.

    But that number is at odds with DHS' official estimates. The agency claims authorities catch 80 percent of adults trying to sneak in, but critics say the figure is padded to make it appear border security is more effective than it really is.

    "The Obama administration knows that the number of illegal aliens successfully getting across the Mexican border is 158 percent higher than they are telling people," said John Lott, president of the Crime Prevention Research Center, who assessed the statistics for Fox News. "The administration has made fraudulent changes in the numbers to hide this."

    If released by the Obama administration, the true numbers could have major implications in the current presidential race, in which illegal immigration and border security have become a key issue, say observers.

    One source familiar with the report told Fox News that DHS is suppressing the report for "political reasons . . . because it would 'look bad' and 'help elect Donald Trump."

  21. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    A USC/Los Angeles Times poll found 55 percent of respondents support a law forcing condom usage in porn films...

    These seems telling on a few levels.

    1. Citizen X   9 years ago

      55% of respondents' parents should have used condoms.

      1. Private Chipperbot   9 years ago

        It amazes me people don't immediately do a full stop when the word force appears in a sentence. At least long enough to thing about the implication.

        1. John DeWitt   9 years ago

          May it be with you

  22. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

    You guys don't fuck around do you?

    1. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      I'll fuck you around; how about that?

      1. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

        Your mom thought that was funny.

        1. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

          My mom thinks your face is funny.

          1. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

            Well I look like her so it's ok.

            1. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

              You're an overweight, chain-smoking, semi-alcoholic?

              Nice.

              1. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

                You forgot deplorable.

                1. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

                  that goes without saying here

  23. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Those aren't extra legs...

    Mystery creature with 'several legs' spotted at petrol station

    SCARY footage has captured the moment a mysterious creature with several legs seemed to suddenly appear outside a petrol station.

    In the strange clip, a bright figure appears out of nowhere before vanishing again only seconds later at the petrol station in Peru.

    Staff who were outside appeared mesmerised with the creature and began moving closer to the seemingly supernatural being.

    1. Jerryskids   9 years ago

      Several legs? You know what else has several legs? Llamas. I'll bet that "mystery creature" shows up every day - it's just the daily llama you idiots.

  24. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Deutsche Bank to fight $14 billion demand from U.S. authorities

    Deutsche Bank (DBKGn.DE) said it would fight a $14 billion demand from the U.S. Department of Justice to settle claims it missold mortgage-backed securities, a shock bill that raises questions about the future of Germany's largest lender.

    The claim against Deutsche, which is likely to trigger several months of talks, far exceeds the bank's expectations that the DoJ would be looking for a figure of only up to 3 billion euros ($3.4 billion).

    The demand adds to the problems facing Deutsche Bank's Chief Executive John Cryan, a Briton who has been in the job for a year.

    The bank only scraped through European stress tests in July and has warned it may need deeper cost cuts to turn itself around after revenue fell sharply in the second quarter due to challenging markets and low interest rates.

    1. Brett L   9 years ago

      "US jealous of EU Apple beak-dipping, strikes back."

    2. Lee Genes   9 years ago

      a shock bill that raises questions about the future of Germany's largest lender

      Ha! DB is so underwater already that this is just the proverbial straw.

      And this sounds vaguely like a tit-for-tat over Apple.

  25. SugarFree   9 years ago

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky, a strategist for Hillary Clinton SuperPAC Priorities USA.

    So Lizzie has gotten so fed up with SIV that she just decided to dox him on the AM Links?

    1. Citizen X   9 years ago

      FINALLY.

  26. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

    Etiquette expert explains how to behave in the office

    * It is never acceptable to eat any major food at your desk.

    *Shoes should be work-appropriate, with heels limited to two or three inches.
    The open-toed look is one that no self-respecting corporate-type should ever entertain.

    *Even if your office has adopted this Yank import, businessmen and women of a higher class will rise above this and forget it even exists. Friday is still a working day with meetings to attend and clients to meet.
    If my solicitor arrived at a meeting in a polo shirt and jeans, however well-pressed, they'd be sacked on the spot.

    *Very little will irritate your colleagues more than regularly leaving early to collect your children.
    Even if it's just by half an hour or twenty minutes, not playing by the rules by which everyone else is bound is just not cricket.

    *There is never any excuse for a backpack. It screams 'graduate intake' and really even for then shouldn't be seen.
    Female workers with handbags should have something medium sized, good quality leather and muted in colour.

    And on it goes...

    1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

      I eat my lunch at my desk almost every day.

      and routinely leave early so I can meet my son's bus.

      and today it's a t-shirt for my local high school - fundraising football game tonight.

      ... which is why I continue to work here even though I could be making more money somewhere else.

      1. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

        Today is jeans day at my office. Not wearing jeans means we make fun of Mr. Fancy pants.

        1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

          Everyday is jeans day - unless I want to freak management out by dressing up:

          *nervous laughter* "You interviewing today?"

          1. Brett L   9 years ago

            "Maybe. What's my raise look like this year?"

      2. Private Chipperbot   9 years ago

        /high fives LH. Same here. Let's hope weather holds off for all the games tonight.

    2. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

      "It is never acceptable to eat any major food at your desk."

      I only eat minor foods at my desk.

      "Very little will irritate your colleagues more than regularly leaving early to collect your children."

      Unless you're leaving work undone that your colleagues have to pick up in your absence, they can go fuck themselves.

      "There is never any excuse for a backpack. It screams 'graduate intake' and really even for then shouldn't be seen."

      They have a point with this one.

      1. Mr. Flanders   9 years ago

        My office provided me with a backpack on day one. We're in commercial finance so its not exactly what you'd call a very "liberal" industry.

        Most of the advice is trash unless you are in a very traditional industry and performing at a very high level. I do have to say that it does irritate me when people eat food with a strong odor at their desks, especially when I have to take a late lunch because I'm on a call with a client or I'm rushing to close a deal.

    3. Brett L   9 years ago

      Why would I want to carry 30 lbs of stuff on just one shoulder or in hand? Go jump right up your own ass. Backpack screams, "I have to lug this shit through the airport regularly."

      1. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

        Yeah my laptop bag is a backpack. It is comfortable and functional.

        1. 0x90   9 years ago

          Laptop? How quaint. Anything you need to do, you can do, on an iPad Pro. That's why it's called Pro.

          /lol

          1. KDN   9 years ago

            We recently got a few Surface Pro 4's for testing. Our resident Apple booster was tasked with configuring and QAing them and came away completely impressed. His exact words were, "I really don't think the iPad Pro can compete with this. It's not even close."

    4. straffinrun   9 years ago

      Can I add one? Black tennis shoes aren't a replacement for black dress shoes. Sorry, Gary.

      1. SugarFree   9 years ago

        FUCK YOU!

        1. straffinrun   9 years ago

          Baby steps. Start with not tucking your t shirt into your beltless jeans. We'll work from there.

    5. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      *Shoes should be work-appropriate, with heels limited to two or three inches.
      The open-toed look is one that no self-respecting corporate-type should ever entertain.

      I have to agree. I was at the bank last night and really, it looked like I was in a night club. Plus it didn't help they're disorganized. This is just me, but it seems like standards of service have dropped off since my day. /waves fist.

      Plus millennials have a really strange tight-fitted style.

      *Very little will irritate your colleagues more than regularly leaving early to collect your children.'

      You and they can go fuck themselves.

      All these stupid etiquette rules remind me why I went off on my own. I feel at peace now. Imagine working with that guy.

      1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        There is one very attractive gal here who used to routinely dress like she was about to go clubbing. Lots of cleavage, super tight pants, and high boots with spiky heels. It looked great on her, but not very professional.

        I've noticed she's toned it down since she got promoted up a level, but at the last software conference I went to with her, she went back to the "mom stripper" look for the evening dinner and drinks. Not that I minded...

        1. Juice   9 years ago

          So she dressed that way and got promoted, huh?

          1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

            Just a wild coincidence to be sure.

      2. Free Society   9 years ago

        Shoes should be work-appropriate, with heels limited to two or three inches.

        Heels are just awful. I think women look clownish in them and after extended use, it literally deforms the women's feet. Giant growths jutting off the side of a women's foot isn't all that attractive.

        *Very little will irritate your colleagues more than regularly leaving early to collect your children.'

        You and they can go fuck themselves.

        Yes indeed, they can go fuck themselves. My kids are more important than the fact that my colleagues regularly work too slow to get their end-of-day accounting done on time.

        1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

          Especially young woman who can't seem to walk in them.

          Not a good look.

          The family thing is annoying. And it's always the people without a family who push off the 'if you don't make your work your life you're not dedicated enough' bull shit. My former associate was like that. He just couldn't get in his thick head people had lives. He didn't have a healthy view on family and marriage and it came out in his demands.

          1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

            I've routinely been stuck doing other people's work because their little guy has soccer practice. My dog likes to go for truck rides, but I don't leave other people holding the bag while I leave an hour early.

            1. Free Society   9 years ago

              Well your dog is a dog. So there's that.

              1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                And a kid is a kid, so there is that.

                1. Free Society   9 years ago

                  That's right. People are more important than dogs. Glad we can agree.

                  1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                    I care more about my dog than work acquaintances kids, so no, we don't agree. If your kid is hit by a car and you have to go to the hospital, fine. Getting out of work and leaving it for me while you go watch a child pretend to be a ballerina is annoying.

                    1. Free Society   9 years ago

                      The fact that you care more about your dog than someone else's kid means nothing. I care more about my least favorite tennis shoes than I care about your dog, yet if a building was on fire and I could only save either my shoes or your dog, and then I choose my shoes, then it's evident that my moral priorities are all fucked up. People>dogs>shoes

                    2. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                      I'm sorry, there is a moral imperative to soccer practice? That's your argument? Here's a crazy idea. If you can't meet your work obligation, get another job. I like to call it, taking responsibility for your life choices. I'm one of those anti-village to raise a child people.

                    3. Free Society   9 years ago

                      Soccer practice is your little example. I pick up my kid from the sitter at quitting time. I like to spend time with my kids, I don't like to spend time picking up the slack for co-workers who leisurely finish up their workload at the end of the day because they don't have anywhere to be.

                      Here's a crazy idea, if your employer is okay with letting people off work to be with their families and that so unnerves you, get another job. I like to call it 'wearing big boy pants'. I'm one of those 'fuck off I don't care about your personal peeves people'.

                    4. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                      Except my employer releases us by hours work for the week, so supervisors are breaking policy by letting them out early. It's not a big enough deal to quit over. It's annoying the self righteousness of "I made a personal choice, other people should pay the consequences of that choice"

                    5. Brett L   9 years ago

                      A personal choice like keeping a job where you disagree with management's interpretation of their own work and time rules?

                    6. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                      Is that in response to me? Here is the way it's suppose to work. The order we are released is by the number of hours we have worked that week. For example. I have 40 hours before even starting today, so I'm first to go home by policy (it's cuts down on OT pay). If one of my coworkers who have worked less hours than me goes to the attending physician and says "today my kid has a school play" and they let them out, they have broken policy and I do more work than the coworker. Sure I'll get OT, but that shit gets old fast when you're putting 10-15 hours more per week because you chose not to have kids.

                    7. Free Society   9 years ago

                      Where I work, I am the office manager and I'm the only one that can do any job in the office, so I regularly cover for others. We don't get sick leave or vacation leave, we get "paid time off" that is discretionary and we can bank for up to two years. If anyone in my office is paying for the consequences of other people's choices, it's typically going to be me. Me staying late at work however, means that my babysitter is the one dealing with the consequences of my choices and I like my babysitter, so I'd like to keep her.

          2. Chip the Chipper   9 years ago

            The family thing gets abused in some places though. My wife's work only want people with sick children to be able to work from home. How the fuck does that work? How do you work and take care of a sick child?

            1. Brett L   9 years ago

              Benadryl in their bottle?

            2. thom   9 years ago

              How do you work and take care of a sick child?

              Netflix. Autoplay.

            3. Free Society   9 years ago

              Well in my experience, the kid just kinda sits there all quiet watching cartoons while you periodically get them water or crackers and work on your laptop.

              1. straffinrun   9 years ago

                Or that thing called homework. Do a lot of work at home and take care of the kid at the same time. Make a little less money this way, I don't want to miss this time.

          3. Free Society   9 years ago

            And it's always the people without a family who push off the 'if you don't make your work your life you're not dedicated enough' bull shit.

            Well rest easy knowing that their genes will not contribute to the future of the human gene pool.

          4. thom   9 years ago

            And it's always the people without a family who push off the 'if you don't make your work your life you're not dedicated enough' bull shit.

            A lot of these people also seem to assume that you're only taking care of your kids during periods where you would otherwise be working, and are otherwise recreating just like them.

            No, I don't go home early, take care of my kids, and then go out for dinner/away for the weekend/off to the movies/etc like you do. I go home, take care of my kids, and then when you're doing all those fun things, I keep taking care of my kids.

            1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

              I honestly don't care what people do in their personal life, but I do care when I have to pick up the slack of their work life because their personal life is interfering.

              1. thom   9 years ago

                but I do care when I have to pick up the slack of their work life because their personal life is interfering.

                Then...don't? Demand that other people pull their weight? Take a job with an employer who is more hostile to families? You have a lot of options.

            2. Agammamon   9 years ago

              As for a civilian environment - as long as you're fulfilling your work obligations (ie, not leaving work for your *co-workers* to finish up after you've booked) and your boss is satisfied, fuck 'em. And I say that as one of those single people.

              In a military environment its a little different. If you're getting to leave early you are leaving extra work for others to finish before they can go home. Single people tend to get screwed that way since there's a definite bias towards preferring those with dependents.

              But still - you chose to have children. As long as that choice doesn't affect me or you aren't being given special treatment for it, I could care less about how long you spend in the office relative to me.

              1. thom   9 years ago

                But still - you chose to have children

                LOL

                1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                  Why is that funny? Are condoms, abortion and adoption illegal where your from?

                  1. thom   9 years ago

                    Why is that funny? Are condoms, abortion and adoption illegal where your from?

                    We get it, you don't have kids.

                    1. Free Society   9 years ago

                      He has a dog, so he totally gets the whole kids thing, probably better than people who actually have kids.

                    2. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

                      but was he hit by a bus? /Tony

                    3. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                      Words still have meaning. You had a choice.

                    4. Citizen X   9 years ago

                      We get it, you don't have kids.

                      Since he's a Florida Man, you definitely need to finish that sentence with "...that you know of."

                    5. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

                      We get it, you don't have kids.

                      That's not a response to his point. It's just a (bizarre) ad hominem. How is it a laughable claim that having children is a choice?

                    6. Weekend at Hillary's, Jr.   9 years ago

                      I'm gonna guess that means, "If you're married and the wife wants kids, you're having kids, amirite?" - but thom should elaborate.

                    7. thom   9 years ago

                      I'd rather be efficient at work so I'm going to put my kids up for adoption. Life is just full of these little choices.

      3. KDN   9 years ago

        Plus millennials have a really strange tight-fitted style.

        I used to agree about that choice in style, but in my last wardrobe update I went with slim / fitted cut shirts and slacks and found out they're actually quite comfortable. Assuming you have the body for it and stay way from the truly skin tight stuff it's a much better look in a professional setting, IMO. I'm kind of amazed at how quick I flipped; I think my clothes from 2-3 years ago look positively goofy now.

    6. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

      Etiquette expert? Yeah, I'm going to some bum who has never held a real job about what I should do at work.

      1. Tonio   9 years ago

        Shill for the fashion/luggage industry. Duh. Also, classist.

    7. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      What a bunch of malarky! If you can get away with wearing jeans, then wear jeans. However, as Curb explained, a casual work environment isn't for everyone.

    8. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

      I eat breakfast and lunch at my desk, but I have my own office and do pretty much what I like in it.

      1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

        Do you, eh?

        /wide grin.

    9. Chip the Chipper   9 years ago

      The leaving early for kids thing does really piss me off.

      It happens at my wife's office all the time. People use their kids as an excuse to arrive late and leave early and no one gives a shit because OMG KIDZZZZ

    10. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

      The only one of these that is close to write is the kids ones, and that still requires some caveats: if you arrive early to make up that time, it's fine. If you use personal time to leave early, that's fine. If you accept fewer hours (assuming hourly) or pay (assuming salary) in order to leave fine, that's fine.

      1. thom   9 years ago

        How about just getting your work done? The obsession with seat time is annoying.

        1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

          that's the motto of my boss - "as long as the work gets done"

          and he spends a lot of time working from home, disappearing for long stretches of time, and taking "vacations" that don't seem to be reported to anyone.

          But he will spend Labor Day weekend doing a major ERP software upgrade, or spend Christmas working on the database, or answer emails while being down in Florida.

          We're all on call 24/7 - which is why we have a wide latitude of how we work our hours.

        2. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

          If that's the case then the kid-less employees will be doing that too.

          1. thom   9 years ago

            If that's the case then the kid-less employees will be doing that too.

            Exactly. Kids-less people seem to spend a lot of their work-time worrying about what the people with kids are doing, when everybody just needs to do their work and mind their own business.

            1. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

              when everybody just needs to do their work and mind their own business

              The whole point of this discussion is people using kids as an excuse to get out of doing their work. If someone is leaving to pick up their kids, and they've got all their own work done, and everyone else can leave when they have all their own work done, no one gives a shit.

              1. thom   9 years ago

                No, the whole point is people who are upset that people use their kids to leave early or arrive later. Nobody ever actually talks about work output, they just continue the obsessive observations of when people arrive and depart from their desks.

                1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                  I literally last week had to stay 3 hours late because someone left early for a kids soccer game. But please, keep attacking straw men.

                  1. thom   9 years ago

                    I literally last week had to stay 3 hours late because someone left early for a kids soccer game.

                    You chose to do this.

                    1. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                      I'm bound by patient abandonment laws, so no.

                    2. thom   9 years ago

                      And I'm bound by laws saying I can't leave my stupid kids at home alone, so in the short run, we're both right. But as you pointed out, in the greater scheme of things I can put my kids up for adoption, and you can quit your job. So, yeah, you chose this for yourself.

                    3. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                      I never made the idiotic statement "I didn't have a choice".

                    4. thom   9 years ago

                      OK then. You're the one who made this all about choice. Words have meanings.

              2. Florida Hipster   9 years ago

                Exactly. I don't care if you have 10 kids. I do care if you have 10 kids to get welfare.

                1. Free Society   9 years ago

                  Or if you only have 10 kids because welfare allows you to do so. The person who has ten kids and can provide for them on their own dime is the kind of person I want to see having kids, all else being equal. The person whose reproductive habits require subsidy, or reproduce because of subsidy, are making the future of the species just that much worse off. This is what was left out of the movie Idiocracy.

    11. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

      "It is never acceptable to eat any major food at your desk."

      Literally EVERYONE at my workplace, except me, does this.

      And the only reason I don't is that I live only 6 minutes away from my house, so I just go home for my lunch breaks.

    12. Agammamon   9 years ago

      Friday is still a working day with meetings to attend and clients to meet.
      If my solicitor arrived at a meeting in a polo shirt and jeans, however well-pressed, they'd be sacked on the spot.

      So the guy actually isn't an expert and is just pulling shit out of his ass.

      'Casual Friday' is for employees who are not normally 'customer-facing'. If you're expecting to meet with clients/customers you either don't dress casually or bring a change of clothes.

      'Only dress in blue or gray'. If I still wanted to wear a uniform after leaving the military I'd have gotten a job at FedEx.

    13. Emmerson Biggins   9 years ago

      Fuck of slaver.

  27. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Johnson Said to Tell Italy Exit Talks Likely to Start Early 2017

    Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson told his Italian counterpart that the U.K. will likely begin formal Brexit negotiations early next year, according to an official briefed on the conversation.

    Johnson, who campaigned for Britain to leave the European Union, met with Paolo Gentiloni in Florence on Thursday, telling reporters afterward that the U.K. "must supply clarity, certainty" on its plans. Gentiloni said, "We need certainty on timings for Brexit."

    The Italian Foreign Ministry declined to comment on what was said during the private meeting and the U.K. Foreign Office wasn't able to respond immediately to the report.

    Triggering Article 50 of the Lisbon Treaty in early-2017 would allow U.K. Prime Minister Theresa May to answer recent warnings from home and abroad not to procrastinate on delivering Brexit. May has so far declined to give a timeframe for starting the two years of divorce talks other than to say they won't begin this year because her government needs time to form a plan.

    1. Free Society   9 years ago

      One positive thing about the EU over that of the US: at least the EU doesn't start shooting and wage destructive war when it's sub-units make moves to secede.

      1. Brett L   9 years ago

        They were still under the Articles of Confederation. Let them try it after the next EU Constitution.

        1. Free Society   9 years ago

          I suspect that the eurocrats would love to see a new constitution with secession specifically outlawed and made into a casus belli.

      2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

        As a G7 member and founding member of the EEC, This is where I think Italy can play a substantial role in this. Italy doesn't carry the anti-Anglo baggage of France and Germany. In fact, they generally hold a positive view of Britain; and the U.S. for that matter. Whereas France and Germany will likely make noises about them leaving, Italy can be play the good cop to bad cop role to keep things stable and civil.

      3. Chip the Chipper   9 years ago

        Well that might be because they spent the last 1000 years killing each other and they just needed a 30-40 year nap.

  28. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

    Today's most subtance-free, hackery-heavy op-ed, for your hate-reading pleasure.

    "Millennials are the only generation the majority of which think the U.S. must have done something to provoke 9/11." Thrall's study concluded that millennials "perceive the world as significantly less threatening than their elders," "are more supportive of international cooperation than previous generations," and "are also far less supportive of the use of military force."

    the main reason for millennial apathy towards the possibility of a Trump victory, I suspect, is a lack of historical understanding. Millennials, particularly American ones, are too young to have any memories of the Cold War, never mind World War II, when fascists ruled Europe and millions of people died as a result. Trump's echoes of fascist movements past has no resonance with us.

    This guy...

    1. WTF   9 years ago

      Trump's echoes of fascist movements past has no resonance with us.

      But what about Hillary's echoes of fascist movements past?

    2. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

      "Millennials are the only generation the majority of which think the U.S. must have done something to provoke 9/11."

      Because no attack on you is ever provoked when you're the Good Guy.

      "perceive the world as significantly less threatening than their elders,"

      What does it say about how terrible the other generations that the other generations view the world as more threatening than the generation of safe spaces??

      "are more supportive of international cooperation than previous generations," "are also far less supportive of the use of military force."

      Why does the author view those things as bad??

  29. Libertarian   9 years ago

    "Californians want to put condoms on porn stars"

    I think they already have people who do that.

  30. yet another dave   9 years ago

    This is awesome on many levels... the amateurish trolling... the self rightious sjw bullying and the money quote from a political science prof at the end of the article...

    http://www.cbc.ca/beta/news/ca.....-1.3764642

    1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      I can but stand and applaud the comments.

    2. Tyler.C   9 years ago

      I love how she tried to spin herself as being reasonable after the fact. Let's not forget she has diverse (culturaly and sexually ) friends

      1. John DeWitt   9 years ago

        So her friends like missionary AND reverse cowgirl? That is diverse.

    3. straffinrun   9 years ago

      How is Trump anymore bigoted than Hillary in regards to sexual orientation?

      1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        He just is! /prog

      2. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

        Technically he came out in support of gays before Clinton...

    4. Chip the Chipper   9 years ago

      If you quit a class because of a fucking hat, then you are a fucking idiot. Nice waste of money.

    5. LoneWaco   9 years ago

      My favorite part is how the closeups of her mostly leave her face out of the frame.

  31. Free Society   9 years ago

    Donald Trump told Dr. Oz yesterday that he supports making birth control pills available without a prescription.

    That can't be, because that would mean Hilary was attacking a strawman when she said that her ideological opponents say birth control pills make women fat and crazy and should be restricted or something. I have it on very good authority that all Republicans want to ban birth control and are talking about doing so constantly.

    1. A Cynic's Guide to Zen   9 years ago

      Bewilderment and bewonderment.

    2. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

      I'll have to hand it to *Trump (or more like his handlers). He's cutting into the Democrat narrative - speaking at that Detroit church, the Louisiana visit, the maternity leave stuff, etc

      *note at this point I'm not voting for any president candidate this year.

      1. Free Society   9 years ago

        *can't blame you. But no reason not to enjoy salty leftist tears.

        1. WTF   9 years ago

          If Trump actually wins, the lefty howls of despair will be my consolation.

    3. WTF   9 years ago

      Not wanting to pay for something is the same as banning it. This is known.

  32. Don Escaped Texas   9 years ago

    Howdy

    1. Free Society   9 years ago

      Are you some kind of Texan Rufus? Get out of here, impostor.

      1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        We already have our Canadian quotient of commentators

      2. Don Escaped Texas   9 years ago

        One Rufus is enuff

        1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

          You know, I'm starting to get the hints.

          1. Don Escaped Texas   9 years ago

            You're great, but snotry quips about others is how you fit in, it seems

            1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

              Around here it's snotry quips all the way down

          2. DOOMco   9 years ago

            *throws pilsner*

  33. Fruit Sushi 2 Go   9 years ago

    Donald Trump told Dr. Oz yesterday that he supports making birth control pills available without a prescription.

    Can't wait for the Jezebel article telling me why this is bad

    1. WTF   9 years ago

      It's bad because TRUMP white cis-hetero-normative shitlord! Duh!

    2. Isaac Bartram   9 years ago

      The "official" feminist narrative has been out there from the time that people like Sandra Fluke started campaign for mandatory BC coverage in drug plans.

      It's bad because insurance drug plans don't pay for OTC meds.

  34. Just a thought not a sermon   9 years ago

    "It is never acceptable to eat any major food at your desk."

    I only eat minor foods at my desk.

    "Very little will irritate your colleagues more than regularly leaving early to collect your children."

    Unless you're leaving work undone that your colleagues have to pick up in your absence, they can go fuck themselves.

    "There is never any excuse for a backpack. It screams 'graduate intake' and really even for then shouldn't be seen."

    They have a point with this one.

    1. SugarFree   9 years ago

      I only eat minor foods at my desk.

      [Old Man With Candy perks up]

    2. Chip the Chipper   9 years ago

      One of our senior level guys here wears a backpack some. Who gives a fuck.

    3. robc   9 years ago

      I am using a regular laptop bag now, but I actually prefer the laptop backpack.

      But if you dont haul your computer home every night, I would agree.

    4. lap83   9 years ago

      "and it's like, I'm supposed to be all happy 'cause she's wearing a backpack, you know?"

  35. Eman   9 years ago

    The message I'm getting is I should stop considering my options and just vote trump. Good thing I don't just reflexively follow the orders of someone named "Clinton"

    1. robc   9 years ago

      During the olympics, her commercials were clearly intended to get me to switch from Johnson to Trump.

      Its not just her though, if I believed what the Ds said about Rs I would be voting straight party Republican.

  36. Eman   9 years ago

    And is that billboard ban a belated
    reaction to the Boston/aqua teen hunger force debacle?

  37. robc   9 years ago

    In states where Trump has a big lead but well less than 50%, Clinton should be encouraging her voters to vote for Johnson in order to prevent Trump from getting to 270. She should also be pushing for them to vote in D house members so she can win in the House in that case.

    And vice versa for Trump.

    Of course, this strategy is self-serving for me, as it is the best hope for a Johnson victory. But game theory wise, its the best option for Clinton/Trump. Assuming they only care about 2016 and not the long term condition of their parties.

    1. Brett L   9 years ago

      I notice that the "wasting your vote" seems to be shouted most loudly by the candidate who appears to be losing at the time.

    2. Joe M   9 years ago

      Sounds like some kind of weird reverse Prisoner's Dilmma.

      1. Joe M   9 years ago

        Dilemma even, damnit.

      2. John DeWitt   9 years ago

        I thought you were just referring to Dilma Rousseff, who will have her own prisoner's dilemma soon enough.

      3. robc   9 years ago

        Arrow's Theorem.

  38. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

    A Swedish court says it won't suspend a rape investigation against Wikileaks mastermind Julian Assange.

    Mastermind?

    Et tu, Reason?

    1. straffinrun   9 years ago

      Good catch.

    2. John DeWitt   9 years ago

      triggered

    3. mojoe   9 years ago

      He was a hero until he started releasing Hillary's dirty laundry.

      Writing 'Hillary's dirty laundry' made me gag a little.

  39. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

    Today's most subtance-free, hackery-heavy op-ed, for your hate-reading pleasure.

    What is it with this insistence that candidates needn't bother themselves with earning votes? I see the same thing from the Trump camp: vote for our guy because we really want it and you owe it to us. Uh, no. That's not how this work. Your candidate needs to make an attractive pitch.

  40. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

    Why has no-one commented on the AM Link to the sex toy story? It's awesome:

    (NEWSER) ? It's a tale for the ages: A woman buys a vibrator, uses it, and discovers the company that built it is tracking just what she does with it and how often. And yes, she's suing.

    In a class-action lawsuit representing what the Chicago Tribune reports is tens of thousands of users, the Illinois woman has marched her smart dildo to Chicago to sue sex-toy company Standard Innovation. She accuses the company, which is based in Ottawa, Canada, of consumer fraud, unjust enrichment, intrusion upon seclusion, and violating the Federal Wiretap Act and the Illinois Eavesdropping Statute ? and she's asking for unspecified punitive damages, reports Vocativ.

    The woman reportedly bought her We-Vibe Rave for $130 in May and proceeded to use it several times before learning via a Defcon hacking convention talk (which CNET reported on last month) that her extremely personal usage was being scrutinized for marketing purposes by its maker, reports Courthouse News.

    1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      I just posted a comment about it: Check out this funny thread from 2 days ago.

      1. invisible furry hand   9 years ago

        Thanks Injun

      2. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

        Snatchchat. That's terrific.

        1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          People either didn't notice or didn't get my parody of the Terminator line: "Come with me if you want to live".

          The Vibrinator: "Live with me if you want to come."

    2. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

      "The toy can allow someone else to be at the controls from afar ("play together from anywhere in the world")."

      Sounds like a premium option for the webcam performers. I'm in

      1. Private Chipperbot   9 years ago

        Pfft.

        The toy can allow someone else to be at the controls from afar ("play together from anywhere in the world

        If I know dudes to who pay for cam shows like I think I do, there may as well be only two speeds - off and 11.

      2. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        Maybe I'm a prude, but I sometimes wonder if the Amish are right after all to shun technology.

    3. Libertarian   9 years ago

      "A woman buys a vibrator, uses it, and discovers the company that built it is tracking just what she does with it and how often."

      Oh boo hoo. Wait until the sexbots for men come out. Imagine the audio, video, and other data that will be collected. Besides, how else are you going to get the appropriate software upgrades?

      1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        I wonder what the implications of sexbots will be for family formation. We're entering a new world, that's for sure.

        1. Libertarian   9 years ago

          Imagine the ransomware of the future. Instead of locking up your laptop, the family robot will put it's hands around your throat (or the throat of you kids) and say, "I will release my grip as soon as you send $500 to my true masters."

          1. Pan Zagloba   9 years ago

            And that's why they will be collecting data. You don't want the reply to be "Oh yeah! Squeeze harder!"

  41. Idle Hands   9 years ago

    Exclusive: Hillary Clinton Campaign Systematically Overcharging Poorest Donors:

    Hillary Clinton's campaign is stealing from her poorest supporters by purposefully and repeatedly overcharging them after they make what's supposed to be a one-time small donation through her official campaign website, multiple sources tell the Observer.

    The overcharges are occurring so often that the fraud department at one of the nation's biggest banks receives up to 100 phone calls a day from Clinton's small donors asking for refunds for unauthorized charges to their bankcards made by Clinton's campaign. One elderly Clinton donor, who has been a victim of this fraud scheme, has filed a complaint with her state's attorney general and a representative from the office told her that they had forwarded her case to the Federal Election Commission.

    Old cat ladies apparently are easy marks.

    1. Tonio   9 years ago

      Oh, my...

    2. Lee Genes   9 years ago

      WDATPDIM?

    3. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

      So pilfering their own bank accounts is fraud, but they're voting for a commie. Got it.

    4. WTF   9 years ago

      Thieves gonna thieve...

  42. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

    An Illinois woman is suing a sex-toy maker for invastion of privacy.

    This was already covered by Lord Humungus 2 days ago.

    Swissie's story about the Vibrinator was also fun.

  43. 0x90   9 years ago

    Janitors in California must receive anti-sexual harassment training under a new measure signed by Gov. Jerry Brown.

    I've heard of asexuals, but this is getting ridiculous.

  44. Quo Usque Tandem   9 years ago

    Personally I'm rather happy that the Johnson Live Free sticker on my rear window will be especially annoying to any idiot who intends to vote for Hilldog. But push come to shove I have to agree, Trump is slightly less odious.

    My fondest approaching para reality hope is that Johnson will at least take just enough votes to fuck up the whole business where no one gets a sufficient majority [270 electoral votes] to take the election and it gets kicked to the House per 12th Amendment rules. Of course Johnson would actually have to win a State, or even two, for that to happen so it remains largely a dreamland vision.

    But just imagine how that would play out. Given the Republican majority there ain't no f'n way Hilldog could walk, or hobble, away with it, and Trump being so odious to establishment Republicans, I could actually see Gary getting the office given the choices.

    1. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

      Gary needs to win a couple of the blue states. Taking a red state doesn't alter Hillary's math.
      Maybe that's why he sounds so much like just another lefty

      1. robc   9 years ago

        I think there is a semi-reasonable 266-266-6 EC pattern with Johnson winning only Utah.

        Take 2012 results. Shift FL, OH, VA, and NV to R. Shift Utah to L.

        Not sure that is most likely. IA is more likely than VA right now. So would need NH and 1 district in ME to knock Clinton to 269.

        269-263-6 would be awesome.

        But I would worry about a faithless elector pushing Clinton over the top.

        1. SFC B   9 years ago

          If I was one of the 6 Johnson electors I'd worry way more about catching a sudden case of suicide by 3 rounds to the head if I didn't switch to Clinton.

  45. Ken Shultz   9 years ago

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky, a strategist for Hillary Clinton SuperPAC Priorities USA.

    I don't think that's likely to have the impact they want. I suspect it will undercut their demonization of Trump in their other advertising.

    If I see advertising that's effectively demonizing me for being a Trump supporter even though I'm voting for Gary Johnson or Jill Stein, I'm not likely to think of myself as a demon. I'm more likely to start thinking that Hilary's demonization of everybody is bogus.

    1. Echo Chamber   9 years ago

      blowback potential of this could work to Gary's advantage.
      You're being manipulated, millennials, stick to your values!

  46. Suthenboy   9 years ago

    "A USC/Los Angeles Times poll found 55 percent of respondents support a law forcing condom usage in porn films (and creating a state "porn czar" to oversee enforcement)."

    Nothing is more mobile than a porn set.

    "Four women say they were drugged and raped at a Washington State University Delta Upsilon party over the weekend, leading the school to suspend the fraternity."

    Upon reading this headline I immediately thought "Bull. Shit"
    Rape victims everywhere thank Jackie and Mattress Girl. And Rolling Stone, mustn't forget them.

    1. Ken Shultz   9 years ago

      The best BBQ joint in Las Vegas, like in a lot of cities, originally sprouted up in the industrial part of town to cater to factory workers, warehouse workers, truck drivers, etc. before and after their shifts. It's the same way in LA. Some of the best old school BBQ joints in LA are hidden in the middle of warehouse districts in Compton. Show me an area with a large local African-American community and a warehouse district, and I'll find you a great BBQ restaurant.

      In Las Vegas, that old BBQ restaurant is still in the middle of the industrial district where it started, but the industrial district around it has changed to cater to the adult entertainment industry. Zoning ordinances usually push stripper bars into the industrial district anyway, and when such a wide selection of them sprouted up to serve Vegas' huge concentration of drunken horny bastards, all these businesses sprouted up around the BBQ restaurant to serve the stripper industry--to the point of excluding other traditional factories and warehouse activities in the area.

    2. Ken Shultz   9 years ago

      There are warehouse sized stores that sell nothing but trashy lingerie. Where there used to be warehouses, there are nail salons and hair places. There are numerous clinics that specialize in boob jobs, lip injections, and plastic surgery. There are health clubs and gyms that cater exclusively to strippers in that area. For blocks in every direction, every warehouse and factory has been converted into something that caters to the adult entertainment industry somehow.

      And they've put in new studios. Lots of new studios. There are web camera studios for girls who want to work the live webcams before or after their dancing shift. And there are new production studios for mainline adult film, too. For the cost of a 40 minute flight from Los Angeles to Las Vegas, adult performers can easily operate in Las Vegas--and live in Santa Clarita or the San Fernando Valley.

      I've read that porn is $100 billion a year industry worldwide. More than half of that is made in the U.S., and a huge chunk of that is made in California. To see politicians chase that business out of the state, you must have the dumbest politicians on the planet. I might understand if they were prudes, but we're talking about southern California.

  47. Auric Demonocles   9 years ago

    I'm pretty sure alt-text falls under electronic billboards.

  48. Tonio   9 years ago

    I'm starting to see Johnson signs on lawns and medians here in Richmond, VA, where our local paper recently endorsed GayJay after decades of endorsing Republican presidential candidates.

    1. Citizen X   9 years ago

      In 2012, my neighborhood was Obama signs in almost every yard. This year, it's 4 Johnson, 1 Hillary, one Bernie, and nothing else.

      1. John DeWitt   9 years ago

        Libretarigentrification taking root.

    2. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      I wish I was in your neighborhood, Tonio.

      I really liked Richmond when I visited it. Carrietown (spelling?) had some really nice restaurants.

      1. Citizen X   9 years ago

        Carytown, bruh.

    3. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      My neighborhood still has lots of Bernie signs, a smattering of HRC signs, and no Johnson or Trump.

    4. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

      I keep seeing billboards for Johnson despite never seeing any such thing for a libertarian candidate ever before.

      And I know 5 people planning to vote Johnson, despite the fact only one's a libertarian.

      He's still got a minuscule chance, but DAMN this election is weird.

      1. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

        The one who is a libertarian being only a lukewarm libertarian, who supports some measures of gun control and works for the FBI.

    5. Glide   9 years ago

      I saw my second Johnson sign yesterday.

      It's an oil town, so Trump is still the runaway leader, but it's now Clinton 2, Johnson 2.

  49. Suthenboy   9 years ago

    Cankles cackling on TV right now. Nothing coming out of her mouth but utter bullshit. Crowd is going nuts clapping and cheering.

    How fucking depressing.

    Apparently the patriarchy is trying to silence black women's voices and crush their dreams. But black girl magic is real.

    What planet are these idiots from?

    1. John DeWitt   9 years ago

      By crowd, I assume you mean "crowd"?

  50. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    saw this Cartoon via Facebook.

    uhm... wut?

    1. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

      Hadn't seen the cartoon, but I've seen the sentiment before. Idea that the most vehemently against Kaep's flag protest would also be most likely to fly the confederate flag, which could be seen as a little bit more disrespectful to the American flag.

  51. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Notorious runaway robot that has escaped lab twice has been arrested by police at political rally

    Promobot was supporting Russian Parliament candidate Valery Kalachev in Moscow when authorities attempted to handcuff it and take it away.

    It is believed that the arrest occurred after a member of public called police as Promobots were recording the opinions of voters on a variety of topics "for further processing and analysis by the candidate's team."

    A company spokesman told Inverse magazine: "Police asked to remove the robot away from the crowded area, and even tried to handcuff him.

    1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

      The first "big book" (over 100 pages - whew!) I ever read as a kid was called Runaway Robot

      1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        alternative creepy cover

        1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

          Alternative alternative creepy cover.

    2. Lee Genes   9 years ago

      Tom Selleck is on the case.

      1. Private Chipperbot   9 years ago

        And Gene Simmons cackles with glee.

    3. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

      First pornobot, now promobot.

  52. Lee Genes   9 years ago

    The self-loathing, it's palpable

    3 Ways Our Middle Class 'Good Intentions' Do More Harm Than Good

    3. 'I Want to Get Rich So I Can Give to Those Less Fortunate'

    My dreams of getting rich come from a desire to see myself and my community with more control over our material lives. Many of us have less than we need to comfortably survive.

    If resources were distributed more equitably, I think there would be enough to go around. We wouldn't feel like we had to hoard, or "get rich," to survive and to do for others.

    And we wouldn't have to resort to charity, or "giving back." Everyone should have the material resources they need to survive. I don't think it's fair for those with resources to feel "charitable" while those without are left uttering thank yous. I do not believe the poor should have to depend on charity for their basic human rights.

    But my class transition was made possible through the "charity" of others. One of the scholarships I received as a high school student is for young people who have overcome great odds to be college eligible. When I was a student, the scholarship hosted an annual gala at a very upscale hotel to raise some of its funds.

    It's almost like there's something to be learned there, but they just can't quite bring themselves to it.

    1. robc   9 years ago

      http://www.aei.org/wp-content/.....lity-1.png

    2. WTF   9 years ago

      Resources are not "distributed", they are earned. Fuckwit.

    3. Glide   9 years ago

      Everyone should have the material resources they need to survive. I don't think it's fair for those with resources to feel "charitable" while those without are left uttering thank yous. I do not believe the poor should have to depend on charity for their basic human rights.

      Good luck getting everyone the resources they need to survive when you start paying doctors and engineers the same as fry cooks. I for one am quitting my job at an energy company to be a fry cook.

  53. Lee Genes   9 years ago

    The internet scorches Jimmy Fallon: 'F*ck him for trying to make Trump likable'

    Cloudy Lemonade
    @KarmineSA

    I get that it's not Jimmy Fallon's job to tear down fascism but he had an opportunity and let it fly by so fuck him.

    7:02 AM - 16 Sep 2016
    1 Retweet 5 likes

    1. straffinrun   9 years ago

      C'mon, Jimmy. Try that with Hillary.

    2. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

      Yeah, that pickle jar bit was hack as hell.

    3. Brett L   9 years ago

      Says some person who fights fascism by commenting on Twitter.

      1. Citizen X   9 years ago

        They wrote "THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS" on the back of their iPhone, but it got rubbed all smeary in their pocket.

    4. Glide   9 years ago

      I enjoy that it's no longer sufficient for a celebrity to be a good person and do good things, they now have to vehemently hate the same people I vehemently hate in order for me to not vehemently hate them.

  54. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    This U.S. city has more Syrian refugees than New York and LA combined

    No one's more excited to welcome the newcomers than Shadi Ismail, 29, who left Syria in 2012 and ended up in Boise.

    "It's good, very good news ? people coming in, being safe now," he said. "They will have life."

    While the new refugees are fleeing Syria's civil war, Ismail feared his family would kill him for being gay. He decided to leave his homeland after his father and brother burned him with charcoal, trying to rid him of his homosexuality.

    "Here in America, you don't have to be afraid," Ismail said. "You walk in the street and nobody will kill you because of whatever religion you are or because you're gay."

    don't mess up the narrative, Shadi.

    1. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

      More young, single men? Yeah, that's a great idea. smh

    2. lap83   9 years ago

      I hope, for his sake, there aren't too many violent right wing extremists in Utah *sighs melodramatically*

    3. spqr2008   9 years ago

      What's hilarious is that truly gay guys like Shadi would be the absolute best single Muslim men to import, since they definitely don't support Sharia, since it would kill them, and aren't going to produce any radical Muslim kids.

      1. ant1sthenes   9 years ago

        Yeah, it wouldn't be so bad if we were importing people who were A) at very real risk, regardless who wins the war, and B) not Part of the Problem. Gays, Christians, liberals and secularists, Yazidis, Zoroastrians, uppity women, etc. But that would be sensible, and it's clear that the government's goal is to promote chaos and turn everything to shit.

    4. Mr. Flanders   9 years ago

      "Here in America, you don't have to be afraid," Ismail said. "You walk in the street and nobody will kill you because of whatever religion you are or because you're gay."

      And somehow we are the ones with a horrible culture.

  55. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump," said Justin Barasky, a strategist for Hillary Clinton SuperPAC Priorities USA.

    Today's most subtance-free, hackery-heavy op-ed, for your hate-reading pleasure.

    So the campaign has already started.

  56. Sevo   9 years ago

    "We'll be launching a multimillion-dollar digital campaign that talks about what's at stake and how a vote for a third-party candidate is a vote for Donald Trump,"

    Are they allowed to spend this money this close to the election?

    1. tres   9 years ago

      Saw the first Trump sign in town yesterday picking the kid up from school, and asked the boy how long it would take to be defaced or trashed. The 4x6 foot sign was face down on a busy road this morning... lasted exactly one night.

      1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        I've seen two houses in my neighborhood with Trump signs. Two Hillary and one Johnson.

        A few Trump bumper stickers but more Hillary, usually with an old Obama sticker on the other side.

        1. Free Society   9 years ago

          I haven't seen one single Hilary yard sign in Ohio so far this year. Though I imagine Dems will get less apprehensive about advertising their support for her the closer to the election we get.

          1. robc   9 years ago

            I have seen one Hillary sign, two Trump and two Johnson.

            1. Free Society   9 years ago

              Yeah it's pretty low key all around, I don't recall the last election with so few yard signs. I've actually seen more for congressional and local candidates than any of the presidential candidates.

          2. Glide   9 years ago

            Also in Ohio. My count is ~13ish Trump, 2 Johnson, 2 Hillary.

        2. thom   9 years ago

          I still see a lot of Sanders stickers. Usually paired with that "Coexist" sticker or something similar.

      2. lap83   9 years ago

        The 4x6 foot sign was face down on a busy road this morning

        So who is going to pick the kid up today?

        1. tres   9 years ago

          Hoping the senora is feeling well enough to get him this afternoon. 4 trips a day with early a.m. athletics conditioning is starting to cut into my billable hours.

          And surprisingly the sign was visible on our return to school (3rd run of the day) propped up in plants next to the curb. I told the boy it will be covered with graffiti by sunrise tomorrow.

          1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

            Party of tolerance and openmindedness.

  57. Cyto   9 years ago

    I don't understand the court's reasoning on the electronic billboards. They say there is no difference between a static billboard and a video billboard with regard to safety or aesthetic impact.

    I'm not sure what evidence they used to come to this conclusion, but they are dead wrong, as anyone who has ever driven past one of these things at night can attest. Atlanta had a couple of early adopters downtown that made you squint away from the bright blue lights shining in your face at night.... sometimes blinking. Farther out of the city the impact is even worse.

    Not saying that they are right to ban them, but claiming there is no difference just flies in the face of reality.

    1. Glide   9 years ago

      Right, I'm not going to call for their banning either, but I think it's perfectly reasonable to acknowledge that there are safety concerns.

  58. Jerryskids   9 years ago

    Bans on electronic billboards are unconstitutional

    I have an idea for a laser eye surgery billboard that shoots lasers into people's eyes and burns the shit out of their retinas. It's up on GoFundMe right now if y'all wanna get in on this.

    The big flashy electronic billboard that sits right along the interstate is a damn road hazard. And why they haven't banned radio ads that feature sirens and honking horns is beyond me.

  59. Suthenboy   9 years ago

    I am getting tired of the 'Trump is a fascist' meme so...yesterday afternoon after an acquaintance uttered it I challenged him to define 'fascism' and give me an example of recent fascism here in America (He is an Obumbles voter)

    The man almost literally twisted himself into a pretzel. The stuttering and spitting was epic.

    1. thom   9 years ago

      If fascism is defined as advocacy for totalitarian government built around nationalism and crony capitalism, Trump kinda seems like a fascist.

      1. tres   9 years ago

        His choice of advisors appears to be straight up RNC hacks. Can't see how Trump will change jack shit if elected, the machine is ratchet bound - it simply can't go backwards.

      2. spqr2008   9 years ago

        But that's (with a more limited version of nationalism, more presented as cult hero worship of the leader) exactly what Obama is too.

        1. thom   9 years ago

          Yeah. The great con of the 20th century seems to be how the political class sold us on fascism without hardly anybody noticing.

          1. tres   9 years ago

            "...political class sold us on fascism without hardly anybody noticing."

            The lapdog media sold it, the moron viewers/voters gobbled it up like Chris Christie at an all you can eat buffet. Trump in the white house would probably cause the MSM to choke out, and that just might be worth the price of admission.

  60. The Fusionist   9 years ago

    Remember when people had to take Kirchik seriously because he was Raising Serious Issues about Ron Paul?

    "Millennials are the first post-war generation to have come of age after the Cold War....The anti-Vietnam War movement may have bred skepticism about America's global role, but the notion that American power was necessary to protect freedom in the world remained a majority one.

    "Millennials, by contrast, spent their early years blissfully unaware about the world and its dangers."

    Yes, a majority of Baby Boomers were against the kind of simplistic foreign-policy views spewed by Hillary and her husband during the Vietnam War. How does that count in Hillary's favor?

    I suspect that if they did a survey about those Boomers who are today pimping for Hillary, that survey would find that those Boomers are more likely than other Boomers to have spent the Vietnam War boning each other in their dorms in between bong hits, while generating such profound insights into international affairs as "war is harmful to children and other living things" and "We're searching for more immediate, ecstatic, and penetrating modes of living.".

    (Then they got haircuts and jobs and supported the War on Drugs at home and the bombing of the former Yugoslavia abroad.)

    1. commodious the pulchritudinous   9 years ago

      "We're searching for more immediate, ecstatic, and penetrating modes of living."

      Aren't we all, though.

      1. The Fusionist   9 years ago

        BILL: "But, honey, you said..."

  61. The Fusionist   9 years ago

    "But the main reason for millennial apathy towards the possibility of a Trump victory, I suspect, is a lack of historical understanding. Millennials, particularly American ones, are too young to have any memories of the Cold War, never mind World War II, when fascists ruled Europe and millions of people died as a result. Trump's echoes of fascist movements past has no resonance with us."

    The "historical understanding" of Hillary-supporting Boomers was that Nixon was a fascist, so was LBJ, and the Dean of Students was a fascist, too.

    Kirchik can go and [the remainder of this sentence has been omitted for reasons of taste].

    1. Free Society   9 years ago

      Speaking of a lack of historical understanding, I know this writer guy that casually equates Trump's policy positions and bombastic comments to the Holocaust and a world encompassing total war, and also for some reason the ensuing struggle against communism's pursuit of world domination.

  62. Glide   9 years ago

    I truly enjoy how dedicated both parties are to winning over third party voters by refusing to address their concerns and then calling them stupid traitors.

    I'm reminded of the eloquent persuasion strategies of the great Martin Luther King, Jr..."I have a dream...that you naive racist motherfuckers would understand how foolish, harmful, and stupid you are. You're literally worse than Hitler and you should be killed. Now obey, puppet!"

  63. Love Problem Solutions   9 years ago

    We Provide You Best Love Astrology Solution For Your Love Marriage Problems.
    Contact Our Love Problem Solution Baba Ji.

  64. Love Problem Solutions   9 years ago

    Love Problem Solution Can Solve Your Divorce Problem By Using Indian Astrology Methods.

  65. Brett L   9 years ago

    In Florida this is appropriate footwear for everything but funerals that don't take place on a boat or beach, and job interviews. And construction.

  66. Agammamon   9 years ago

    And their flexible on the issue in construction.

  67. Brett L   9 years ago

    Not if they carry worker's comp insurance.

  68. DrZaius   9 years ago

    I can't take anybody seriously that carries a backpack. You might as well wear velcro shoes as well.

  69. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Well that describes about 90% of Libertarians

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