Rand Paul

Rand Paul Isn't at the RNC. He's Literally Curing the Blind Instead.

Libertarian leader skipped the GOP convention in order to perform pro-bono surgery on needy patients.


Libertarian-leaning Republican Sen. Rand Paul decided to skip the slow motion trainwreck that is the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland, and he has a pretty good excuse: he's in Kentucky, performing pro bono eye surgery on blind patients.

"I get to scrub in and help Rand Paul while he literally restores vision to a legally blind person and performs surgeries all day," wrote Marianne Copenhaver, Creative Director for the senator, on Facebook. "Yeah, I'm definitely not upset about missing the RNC convention."

That's probably a better use of Paul's time, although the Republican Party's short-sighted 2016 platform is in need of at least as much medical help. Under the leadership of Donald Trump, the party has pivoted away from anything resembling libertarianism, or even small-government conservatism. Two days in, the RNC is little else but a reminder that Trump's GOP is reflexively anti-immigrant, anti-trade, and pro- law and order—a political organization consisting mainly of lies and overwhelming incompetence.

Paul isn't the only notable GOP leader to skip the convention. John McCain, Mitt Romney, and all of the Bushes bailed as well. Former President George W. Bush recently told friends that he's worried he might be "the last Republican president." Given the current ideology of the Republican Party, that might be an aspirational prediction.

Watch a video of Paul performing the surgery below.

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  1. It’s a righteous calling.

    1. They never closed their eyes, anymore, when he kissed their lips.

    2. Just stay on as a doctor.
      Why the f*ck does he want to be associated with those scumbags in Washington anyway. unless for the obvious power.

      1. Maybe he still thinks he can make some small difference as a sane voice in a sea of DERP?

  2. The tendentiousness is strong in this one.

  3. Former President George W. Bush recently told friends that he’s worried he might be “the last Republican president.”

    And that would be a bad thing?

    1. a. Does he realize he was only slightly better than Obama and Trump?
      b. Bush has friends?

      1. I’m sure he’s cool to hang out with and shoot the breeze.

        1. I’d rather hang out with Bubba. Odds are much better of getting high and laid.

          1. Sure, but have you SEEN the quality of woman he gets? He’s no JFK.

            Also, bush doesn’t know anything about politics so it would be a better conversation.

            1. You clearly haven’t discussed politics high.

              1. Sounds absolutely miserable.

              2. +1 Dude; when you think about it…I mean, REALLY think about it…

            2. WHOOOOHOOOOO! Hoggin with Bubba!

          2. Order of interesting hangout times:

            1) Andrew Jackson
            2) Teddy Roosevelt
            3) Tommy J
            4) Eisenhower
            5) Harrison
            6) The Rest

            1. That sounds AWFUL.
              JQ Adams

              1. I don’t think of Washington as the “hanging out” type.

                “Once Gouverneur Morris was offered a bet of one dinner if he would approach George Washington, slap him on the back and give him a friendly greeting. He wanted to show people how “close” he was to the “chief.” Morris carried out the bet, but later admitted that after seeing the cold stare from Washington, he wouldn’t do it again for a thousand dinners!”

                1. Grant would be a great guy to hang out with if you wanted a favor.


                    But it’s not just about boozing it up, it’s about the camaraderie and general atmosphere.

                    Chester Arthur “much preferred fishing, feasting with his cronies, and administrative work to family life.”

                    1. Arthur was a lawyer in litigation over slavery. Unlike a certain other lawyer, Arthur represented the alleged slaves, not the putative master.

                  2. Spencer’s list is good as a “Presidents I would want to be President” list…

                    …but dear God, would hanging out with Coolidge be boring as hell. Washington would be too august and overall intimidating and Grant would probably have some good stories but also a little whiny based on how his memoir reads. JQ would be interesting, and Tommy J’s already on my list so I stand by it, heh.

                2. Yep. Sounds like what I would do. Just don’t be a prick.

            2. Fuck that. Grover Cleveland FTW.

              1. I’d ask Grover Cleveland why he let them name a candy bar after his granddaughter.

            3. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to talk with someone from 200+ years ago. The language was the same, obviously, but there are real differences between how we speak now and how they spoke then. I also imagine that people from back then smelled awful and had terrible breath. I bet walking into a ballroom back then must’ve been like walking into a barn in July.

              1. That’s why the Constitution needs to be rewritten. They could not have envisioned we speak much better than they did!


            4. I’d drink whiskey and smoke cigars with Unconditional Surrender Grant anytime 😛

          3. As between Clinton and Bush II for beer and burgers our back, I’d have a hard time making a choice, honestly. Bush II has been brutally defamed by the press, IMO, and is nowhere near the humanzee portrayed. I expect it would be quite enjoyable, honestly, but I’m from Texas and I think I probably get him more than most non-Texans.

            Bubba, though. You’d have to balance your disdain and discomfort with breaking bread with a sociopath with the undoubted charm and good times.

            Tough call.

            1. I know someone who knows someone who met Bush II. He was, I was told, amazed by his congeniality and wit. Nothing he expected.

              1. Yeah, I never understood that depiction of Bush. Or any president. You don’t become the most powerful person in the world being an unlikeable moron (cough cough Hilary cough).

          4. Somehow I doubt that. Wasn’t W known for being a cokehead?
            Now he’s an artist. Former cokehead, now artist, I’m sure he’s got drugs and hot girls around somewhere.

            Whereas Bubba, He’s like an aging Elvis. He’s probably so burned out that the pills he’s popping are to meant to keep his kidneys functioning. He’d probably dominante the conversation and drone endlessly about the pussy he used to get. I imagine W would have other things to talk about.

      2. I didn’t like his politics but I can totally see him being an easy person to be friends with.

        I like how he’s largely avoided the public eye since leaving office, not even bothering to defend his biggest decisions. He’s willing to let history decide which is commendable in a way.

        1. Going out on a limb here, but I suspect Obama will not do the same. In fact, given our respective ages, I fear I may be subjected to Obama’s opinions until I die.

          1. When your accomplishments all suck, fighting tooth and nail to write history is all you got.

          2. People talk about him getting on to SCOTUS; my bet is still something in the UN.

            1. Yes! Let’s do that! The UN thing.

            2. I really don’t think SCOTUS for Obama. Too much work, not the kind of celebrity life that he wants.

              UN is more like it. He can hang with his Marxist fellow-travellers, nobody is unduly burdened by ethics or a conscience, he can travel and give speeches and chill with celebrities all he wants.

              1. Judging by Obama’s speeches and his overall tone, I don’t see him as the proper temperament for the judiciary.

                He’s more into the axe to grind, activism, wag the finger, thang.

                1. RE: He’s more into the axe to grind, activism, wag the finger, thang. (No clue how to quote here, so this is the best I can do)

                  You say that as if it would be negative points to someone who would be inclined to nominate him to the court….

        2. Unlike, say, campaigning for his crony successor heavily during his lame duck period?

        3. Yeah, W has been a very good former president.

          1. Eh, you never know. Jimmy Carter looked like he was gonna be a great Former President, whatwith Habitat for Humanity, and now look at him.

            1. He’s history’s greatest monster! I call him Gamblor!

              /mixing Simpsons references

          2. I’ve run into him a couple times over the last few years. He’s an interesting guy. A lot smarter than the media would have you think, and he plays into the whole “stupid yokel” caricature with self-deprecating humor. He seems content to hang out in Dallas, watch baseball, and do outdoorsy stuff. He went out of his way to not dive into partisan politics, despite ample opportunity.

            1. Of course he’s smarter than the media wants you to think.

              And then there’s the current president, and his transcripts are still sealed for some reason.

            2. Always found it amusing when the right wing would bitch that GWB was too congenial and above partisan politics, as if that were some sort of flaw instead of the response of a normal person to that sort of penny-ante bullshit. I rarely agreed with GWB’s governing philosophy, but his approach to partisanship was one of only a few things that I could bring myself to enjoy about his presidency and it is telling that it was one of the few things that the right attacked when GWB was still a president with some political clout.

              1. Yes, and on top of all that, George W is also a really talented artist.

                1. I’ve seen the exhibit at the bush presidential library.. he’s not.

                2. You know who else painted?

          3. Pretty much every post in this thread makes me want to vomit. wtf has happened to the reason comments when an entire thread is nostalgic navel-gazing praising the intelligence & nonpartisanship of the torture-legalizing, habeas-corpus-burning, internet-wiretapping, tarp-money-printing george w bush. these used to be among the best comments threads on politics on tbe internet. what a long, strange trip (downhill) it been.

      3. Bush’s friends are probably similar to the friends that John frequently refers to in that they are probably apocryphal.

      4. Only SLIGHTLY?

        C’mon, Bush wasn’t Teddy Roosevelt, but he was an improvement on Clinton, and miles ahead of both the candidates the Democrats ran against him.

        The “Bush was awful” narrative is largely bullshit. The Left pushes it, HARD, because otherwise somebody might ask where the hell they got their current Bozo, and Libertarians seem to buy in because of the strange streak of isolationism in the movement. Get over it. Not going to war somewhere would have been about as popular as a porcupine in a nudest colony. Bush chose two small wars, declined to be dragged into more, and while he should have left when the target governments fell, he didn’t do all that badly.

        Yes, in a perfect world and detached from all consideration of consequences, we should have nuked Mecca and said “There’s more where that came from”. It wasn’t practical.

        Yes, in a perfect world FDR should have stood pat and let the Depression run out naturally. But he had been elected to “Do Something”, and probably doubted that he could outrace a mob with tar and feathers in a wheelchair.

          1. C’mon. What are two small wars between friends? I can’t even remember what we were fighting about.

            1. I still remember those crazy days in 2002, when everyone was absolutely clamoring for Bush to invade Iraq. Who was he to deny us?

        1. Give us all a friggin’ break. I am the last person to defend the Cult of Noninterventionism but Bush’s foreign policy basically consisted of burning giant stacks of money. HUNDREDS OF BILLIONS OF DOLLARS

          And his economic policy basically makes him Herbert Hoover 2.0.

        2. Also, Teddy Roosevelt was horrible.

          “Yes, in a perfect world FDR should have stood pat and let the Depression run out naturally. But he had been elected to “Do Something”, and probably doubted that he could outrace a mob with tar and feathers in a wheelchair.”

          He could have tried ‘doing something’ that didn’t make the Great Depression great, or pushed America into near-despotism.

        3. From the libertarian perspective, Bush was the worst president we ever had. Until Obama.

          1. Absurd. LBJ, FDR, and Wilson were far worse than either of them. Please people, have some perspective.

            1. Shouldn’t you be doing your homework?

              1. Done. Now I’m taking you to school. Class is out.

                1. That’s cute. We can play “Father Figure” on the car stereo as I drop you off at school after I stay over in your mom’s room.

          2. I’m now willing to throw TDR in there. He swallowed what the progressive oligarchy was selling hard.

            1. And there was the whole Spanish War thing which is still the closest America has come to being imperialist.

        4. The “Bush was awful” narrative is largely bullshit.

          Largely? Bush supported countless reductions in our liberties and violated the constitution a myriad of times. He should be considered awful for that reason alone.

          streak of isolationism

          Not going to war for terrible reasons can hardly be called isolationism. Is that the only way to establish relations with other countries in your eyes? Not something like trade, but war?

          Not going to war somewhere would have been about as popular as a porcupine in a nudest colony.

          Even if that is true, so what? We don’t live in a direct democracy, and what is popular isn’t always right.

      5. I’m not so sure BUSH was even slightly better than Block Insane Yomomma. Trump is infinitely better than both…so far.

        1. Cool fantasy bro

        2. What is the matter with your brain?!

          1. He’s retarded. He’s barely literate and incapable of conceptualizing.

          2. Trump isn’t president yet, he’s never even held elective office. At this point he’s better than George Washington, James K. Polk and Calvin Coolidge.

            1. “Trump isn’t president yet, he’s never even held elective office.”

              And he never will.

              “At this point he’s better than George Washington, James K. Polk and Calvin Coolidge.”

              Why not put Jesus in there too seeing as how you clearly worship him. Moron.

        3. Bush II was definitely a better President than Obama, but that’s setting the bar super-low.

          The only area where you can even begin to make a case that Obama was better is foreign policy, where you need to balance the ongoing dumpster fire of Obama’s foreign policy debacles against Bush’s wars. Frankly, I think its a tough call, there. On domestic policy, its not even close.

          1. Everything bad that Obama did domestically was started by Bush. TARP, Medicare D, ‘stimulus’, etc

            1. Bush claimed, if you remember, to be a compassionate conservative; whatever that meant.

              And then 9/11 made him go poof and reemerge as a neocon; or at least let the neocons dictate.

            2. B-b-b-b-but BUSH DID IT TOO!

              Except for, you know, drone assassinations of American citizens, compulsory purchasing of health insurance from a walled garden, Dodd-Frank, regulating CO2 as an air pollutant, defying court orders to suspend resource extraction on public lands, over $100 billion per year in new regulatory costs. Yep, every goddamn thing Obama did domestically he inherited from Bush. Poor bastard just couldn’t catch hisself a break.

              1. Again, Bush started up almost all of that. Dodd-Frank? Bush passed Sarbanes-Oxley. Bush didn’t regulate CO2 as a pollutant but he shoveled tons of money at the AGW cause.

                Nobody is claiming Obama was forced to do what he’s doing by his predecessor you disingenous twat. I’m just pointing out that Bush was a terrible terrible president, Hit&Runpublican; revisionism notwithstanding.

                1. Bush started up almost all of that.

                  No, he didn’t. He started up entirely different boondoggles and was a sufficiently shitty president in his own right, but he didn’t start any of those things. Obama did.

                  Nobody is claiming Obama was forced to do what he’s doing by his predecessor you disingenous twat.

                  No, you’re making a stupid comparison to excuse Obama’s shitty domestic policies because you’re a retarded cunt.

    2. If it means one-party Dem dominance such as found in Cali, then yes.

  4. …although the Republican Party’s short-sighted 2016 platform is in need of at least as much medical help.

    Boom. Segue.

    1. Almost as satisfying as a good bit of alt-text.

    2. I see what he did there. (See what I did?)

  5. Former President George W. Bush recently told friends that he’s worried he might be “the last Republican president.”

    Eff you, George, Trump is the first Republican President!

    1. I could see that as a slogan. Hell,,I could even see it on t shirts sent to Africa before Christmas time.

    2. Gary Johnson may be the last Republican Presidential candidate. Even as he runs on the LP ballot line. Once Trump is elected the GOP may well go the way of the Whigs.


      2. Political Party usually die after winning elections. It is known.

  6. While we’re at it, bring him a paralytic lying on a pallet and have him say, “Arise, take up thy bed and walk”, and see if it works.

    1. If he could do that SURELY he would have done it on the campaign trail.

  7. I sometimes wonder why doctors choose to go into politics. Going from a profession where you are legitimately trying to help people and people generally love you for it to one where huge amounts of people you will never meet will hate your guts, sometimes over some arcane policy position you have not really given that much thought to, seems bizarre.

    1. Sometimes a major amputation is the only thing that will save us from the federal government.

    2. I think its refreshing for a person whose MO has been to help people to join government instead of someone who develops a boner whenever they think about committee seats or spending bills.

    3. I was about to say I could ask my cousin, but then I remembered I know he went into politics. He (who is, umm, a lieutenant governor) who was a plastic surgeon with MSF who patched people together who had been hacked to pieces by machetes went into politics to shut down another doctor who performed late term abortions.

      1. Nobody likes a name dropper.

        1. Well, it’s kind of embarrassing being related to him at times…

      2. That would be Jeff Coyler of Kansas? He’s your cuz? Yo, tell him to stop suing CO about the Mary Jane.

    4. I think some people enter politics because they truly believe they transfer their goodness onto others. But the laws of politics are closer to Machiavelli than Nightingale.

    5. I feel that way about any person or movement that genuinely does good and then decides to get into politics. “Scientific socialism” didn’t get that name purely by accident, and scientific work is one of the greatest and most ennobling tasks of humanity. I’d argue that the early church pre-Constantine did an enormous amount of good shit, and whatever you think of Christian politics after that point it wasn’t as universally great and hailed as helping sick people and buying the freedom of slaves and the like.

      Methinks we as people are interminably addicted to the idea that we can achieve our utopia if only opposition is eliminated, and that politics is the inevitable failure mode of that mode of thinking.

    6. Going into medicine is going into politics now. It’s a government job.

    7. I sometimes wonder why doctors choose to go into politics.


    8. In Rand’s case, it’s daddy issues.

    9. I sometimes wonder why it is assumed that someone in the medical profession is anymore interested in “trying to help people” than an engineer or a lawyer or the cashier at your local grocery store.

      1. Which isn’t to say they don’t help people, only to say that by way of the market, pretty much everybody does, and physicians are no more noble for their chosen career than anyone else. We don’t need to hero worship doctors like they’re doing us favor for taking our money anymore than we would anyone else who provides us with the services we need to survive.

        1. I’d agree for some medical professions, including optometry (although doing pro bono work is, by itself, noble.) But for ER staff, end of life care, etc., the emotional toll must be high, and I’d think that altruism most likely plays a part. I certainly couldn’t do it.

    10. Maybe they want to stop the lawyers from fucking up the health care system.

  8. I sometimes wonder why doctors choose to go into politics. Going from a profession where you are legitimately trying to help people and people generally love you for it to one where huge amounts of people you will never meet will hate your guts, sometimes over some arcane policy position you have not really given that much thought to, seems bizarre.

    1. Well, don’t obsess over it.

  9. Rand really is a good man. I can’t describe my despair when I think about him being rejected in favor of Trump.

    Well, they aren’t called the stupid party for nothing, I guess.

    1. Only in the movies do principles and integrity get you elected.

      1. Are we talking about principles like endorsing Mitch McConnell to get him to apply pressure to the KY GOP to allow him run for president and the senate, or the integrity to endorse Donald Trump after you make an impassioned case that he would be a trainwreck for the country?

        1. How about the integrity to do what you promised you’d do?

          It’s pretty clear he’s not happy about it.

          1. I guess the principle of honoring a generic and purely party-centric political promise is more important than standing up for actual principles.


            1. He does stand for actual principles as Rand’s voting record makes crystal clear.

        2. Endorsing MM was a perfectly reasonable and correct tactic and simply returned the favor MM did for him. Endorsing Trump is unacceptable.

          1. On McConnell, doesn’t the endorsement mean that Rand’s principles are for sale?

              1. Haha, well, asked and answered, I suppose.

                Would you please expound as to why not?

                1. It was just a necessary part of ‘the business’ and one that didn’t do much or any harm. Bevin was the alternative…he was nuts.

                  1. Not sure what qualifies as “nuts” in your mind, but okay, thanks for the detail.

                    Also, Bevin is now the governor, so presumably his nuttiness is on full display.

                    1. I remember Bevin saying he doesn’t believe in embryology and evolution. Nuts.

                      He is the governor, and probably for the best given that he is against the ACA implementation. Still, it’s pathetic that’s the best Kansas can do. What a backwards shithole.

                    2. No more so than Canada.

                      (Sorry, Rufus.)

                    3. Fair enough.

                    4. I remember Bevin saying he doesn’t believe in embryology and evolution.

                      You don’t, because he didn’t, but even if true, stood up against McConnell’s half century in the senate it would look downright sober.

                      Still, it’s pathetic that’s the best Kansas can do.

                      Especially considering that he’s the governor of Kentucky.

                    5. Same difference. They both suck.

          2. Did he ever endorse trump? I thought he simply referred to his pledge…

            1. I thought he did, but I read that in Reason and that rag is less than reliable.

          3. simply returned the favor MM did for him

            Which favor would that be, endorsing Trey Grayson in their primary race?

            1. Making friends with Rand. Helping in the senate.

      2. Or off the hook, as in The Fountainhead.

  10. That’s really cool. Good on Rand for spending his time helping people.

    1. It’s almost like you’re suggesting a life in the public sector isn’t helping.

      1. Well now that he’s no longer the most fashionable candidate in the race, I guess restoring peoples’ sight is a decent second choice.

        1. I never though sad villain was a good look for Rand.

          1. Seems apropros.

  11. I recall he has gone to Guatemala to do the same kind of thing, yet it was portrayed as some kind of campaign stunt.

    1. It’s a campaign stunt for 2020. Rand likes to think long term.

    2. I think he’s been making that trip for years, but when it was done during the primary season, it was obviously a cynical stunt.

    3. Not only that, but people wanted to know why saving american eyesight was less important to for’ners.

    4. Any time you do something like this and alert the media, it’s a publicity stunt. Otherwise, you would not bring it up.

  12. See, now he knows what matters.

    Politics is fucking stupid and party conventions are the distillate of all of the stupidity of politics and nothing else.

  13. “I get to scrub in and help Rand Paul while he literally restores vision to a legally blind person and performs surgeries all day,” wrote Marianne Copenhaver, Creative Director for the senator, on Facebook.

    His political staff is in surgery with him? That’s… odd…

    1. Wouldn’t it make sense for a doctor to have a nurse on staff?

      1. If she’s also a nurse, the article should say that. As written, it makes it sound like she’s there as part of her Creative Director duties.

    2. I think it’s common for doctors to allow friends to scrub in and “assist” with simple procedures. And he wants his promotional team to talk about this, so he has them in the room. Makes him seem chummy and charitable in addition to the act of the surgery.

    3. Anyone can scrub in, as long as they’re healthy and follow instructions.

      1. Tell us about the time they let you do the circumcision. That story never gets old.

        1. A boy, and WHAT A BOY!!! Turns out it was the umbilical cord.

        2. Shooting the snipped foreskin across the room like a rubber band was a little unprofessional, Playa.

    4. Why is that odd? It’s a media stunt, so someone needs to coordinate that it looks good to the invited media.

  14. It’s weird to watch a politician actually do something. He should be behind a podium lecturing us about something.

    1. Wimpy Rand Paul sat out the convention so he could hang out with a bunch of poor blind losers. Sad!

  15. ‘Curing the blind’ better mean he’s helping progressives.

    1. I’m hoping it’s not a euphemism.

  16. He’s a self-aggrandizing prick. When he votes to tax the 1 percent to give to the needy 99 percent that’s when I’ll say to myself “That’s a humanitarian.” Forcing people to cough up their money and giving it to someone who doesn’t really deserve is true charity.

  17. I grew up in Paducah.

    What a shithole.

    1. You’re saying these people are better off blind?

      1. My father bailed out in 97′ because there was no future there. Hence how we came to Texas.

        This after he had bailed out to Paducah in 85′ because there was even less future (negative future?) in southern Illinois, where the rest of my family still lives (mostly on welfare).

        The whole area is just a big pile of poverty and nothing.

        1. That’s right, you’re not from Texas, but Texas wants you anyway.

          Remember to wear your pants just a little longer.

    2. The historic downtown pic on Wikipedia looks nice.

      1. My high school only had window air conditioners in some rooms (and none in the rest), and we couldn’t use a few classrooms due to water damage to the ceiling.

        When I started that school, and my parents went to an orientation, they were basically told that not many kids graduate with good enough grades to go to any decent university, and to just go ahead and pre-fill out your welfare forms now for when you graduate. That’s how my father paraphrased it to me, at any rate. It spooked him badly enough they moved halfway across the country, though, so I imagine they really heard something awful.

        1. Also, in the 90s, there weren’t any minorities there. I see a few here and there now whenever I go back to visit, but 20 years ago it was like living in a snow storm. The most “ethnic” thing that I was ever exposed to was Taco Bell. But upon moving to the suburbs of Dallas, I discovered that both pussy and food come in all the flavors of the rainbow, and this shocking revelation left me with a permanently bad memory of where I’d come from.

          1. Interesting. Yeah, places with only white people in them tend to suck.

            1. Yeah, places with only white people in them tend to suck.

              Says a guy with a 1 in 10 chance of seeing a non-white person anywhere in his entire country…

              1. I know you’re being ‘funny’ but Canada is chock-o-block with non-white people.

                1. Canada is chock-o-block with non-white people.

                  Tell me about it.

          2. “Pussy and food.”

            You say that like pussy isn’t something you eat…

        2. My school had no air conditioning.

          1. I was about to say: as far as I knew, AC was a luxury schools did not usually get.

            1. What 3rd world country are you guys from?!

              1. Canada.

              2. A place that requires neither heat nor air conditioning.

            2. AND WE LOVED IT!

              To be fair, not sure if it’s worth the investment given in places like Quebec it’s, you know, bloody cold most of the time. I’d say from April to March – who cares? That really leaves May and June but by that point we’re outside a lot.

            3. Agile Cyborg should not be a luxury. Every child should have access to Agile Cyborg in elementary school.

              1. Agile Cyborg is at least Schedule II…

  18. At least Paul is DIRECTLY impacting lives.

    Remind me what Obama has done again?

    1. Sold millions of guns.

      1. And helped to foster a divisive narrative where race and other social issues are concerned.

        He’s no uniter datsfirshur.

    2. He’s been great for the local economy at Martha’s Vineyard.

  19. As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His Creative Director asked him, “Rand, who sinned, this woman or her parents, that she was born blind?”

    “Neither this woman nor her parents sinned,” said Rand Paul, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in her. As long as it is day, we must do the works of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.”

    After saying this, he spit on the ground, made some mud with the saliva, and put it on the woman’s eyes. “Go,” he told him, “wash in the local community pool.” So the woman went and washed, and came home seeing.

    (I’m sure Rand wouldn’t appreciate this comparison, I just thought it was funny)

    1. Ugh. And apparently I was too lazy to actually fix the whole thing before posting.

    2. There’s a joke in there about Abner Mikvah.

  20. Hey Faggots,

    My name is Donald, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day talking about liberty. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on Elizabeth Nolan Brown’s twitter feed.
    Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the military drill team, and starter on my football team. What sports do you play, other than “jack off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also get straight A’s at the Wharton School of Business, and have a banging hot wife (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

    Pic Related: It’s me and my bitch


      I’ll be in my bunk.

    2. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on Elizabeth Nolan Brown’s twitter feed.

      How long until someone asks if that is a bad thing?

      1. I took that section personally.

    3. The only things it’s missing is (no offense, I employ a lot of faggots. They are good people when they aren’t all faggoty.)

    4. *whispers to self*

      “How did HM know what I said to my team at work during our weekly meeting today?”

    5. You are truly a god amongst men HM.

    6. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on Elizabeth Nolan Brown’s twitter feed.

      … *grabs daily planner*

    7. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes

      I am NOT retarted.

  21. OT: Troopers face assault charges

    A state trooper from New Hampshire and a trooper from Massachusetts are facing assault charges in connection with the May arrest of a man after a high-speed chase.

    The New Hampshire Attorney General’s Office said Tuesday that Massachusetts Trooper Joseph Flynn, 32, and New Hampshire Trooper Andrew Monaco, 31, were charged with simple assault in connection with the May 11 arrest of Richard Simone Jr., 50, of Worcester, Massachusetts.

    Acquittal coming.

    1. “Look fellas, we are going to have to charge you. It’s the political climate- we got no choice. However, and I can promise you this, we won’t actually try very hard for a conviction. Blue lives matter. You are a couple of real life heroes.”

  22. He’s not perfect but damn it, he would have been a great candidate for the Presidency. Overall, I’m happy he’s not in Cleveland participating in that freak show.

    1. I bet they begged too. I bet trump thought he would be his vp, because why not.

  23. This barmy coven of eagles extols the polished peeper prickings plied by the curlicued maestro of soaring.

  24. You know who else is known for curing the blind?

    1. Hitler?

  25. OT: Red State is blogging the delegate count. Apparently the chair is just ignoring what the delegates say and loading all the votes for Trump. They are just blatantly stealing this thing.

    1. Lol!

      Get out of the basement. Your Mom says she has your poutine ready

      1. I am far more successful in life today than you ever will be. Don’t speak to me unless spoken to you fucking peon.

        1. Success here being measured in blog posts furiously tapped out between beat off sessions in your mom’s basement.

          1. No, success in terms of career and education. I’ll leave the basements to you and your fellow mouth-breathers.

            1. You might be surprised to find out that you’re not the first independently wealthy, doctorate-holding Mensa member who can’t differentiate Kentucky from Kansas that I’ve met posting on anonymous online blogs 5 hours a day. Seems like you’re disproportionately represented.

            2. Weren’t you begging for a job a few months ago?

              1. yeah. He was asking asking about how to learn to code and what is best to learn.

                Suddenly he’s Donald J. Trump.

            3. High School class vice President ?

              1. Me thinks your protest too much.

  26. Gotta give Bush some credit: he’s right about him being the last GOP president. Stick a fork in that party she’s done.

  27. “86 per cent of border residents in Mexico and 72 per cent of those questioned in the U.S. were against building a wall.”


    1. What a brilliant post.

      86 percent of Mexicans don’t want a wall.

      72 percent of those questioned on the American side of the border say they don’t want a wall.

      No idea how many of them were American citizens , or how many of them might have been asked the question on both sides of the border.

      At least the article admitted the question was asked of urban respondents.

      I don’t want a wall.Walls work in both directions.

      I don’t want to shut down the cross border labor migration. What I do want is a controlled guest worker program
      so that we have control over who is here and why they are here.

      Much like the one Canada has.

  28. Rand Paul 2020: A Clear Vision for the Future

      1. Remember, you heard it here first!

        1. I hope the next 4 years fly by. I cannot wait to say that, in hindsight, you were correct.

  29. HBO’s The Night Of has been very good. It seems like it is going to give a far too accurate look into many aspects of the criminal justice system. For example – and without spoiling anything – the lead detective doing the investigating has acted exactly how most of you folks know how he is going to act. Also, I believe the white, “intelligent,” liberal set approves, and we know that pop culture gets those types to act on something like criminal justice reform.

    1. Great.

      Jackson should get the boot. He was an evil man who butchered indians and niggers.

      1. Hey puck-head, you leave the commenting on past American presidents to those of us who bleed red, white and blue. You don’t see us lecturing you about John MacDonald and his Pacific Scandal, do you?

        1. You need an objective, clear-eyed outside perspective to help you understand things better.

      2. Those Indian savages were attacking Americans. Jackson had every moral right to get them away from the people he swore to protect.

  30. This is what I have been reading. So far, it’s nice and dystopian.

    For extra fun points, there’s a lot of pants-shitting because a white guy wrote it.

  31. Not to take anything away from what he’s doing, but I don’t think I’d want a part timer slicing into my eyes with a laser. Even with continuing education for board certification, I can’t help but think you probably lose a step or two when you haven’t been in regular practice.

    1. Maybe with a forced holiday from politics, he’ll get back into the swing of surgery.

    2. No, no, you’re right. Those indigent blind people should wait until they get the very latest in medical technology for free.

      1. I don’t think a human surgeon qualifies as “medical technology”.

        And I’m sure his patients are duly and sufficiently grateful for his services, which it is very generous of him to offer. I’m saying that personally, it would make me somewhat uncomfortable to have a surgeon whose primarily line of work isn’t actually surgery. I can imagine waking up to “Gimme a break, I haven’t done this in a while!”

  32. Rand Paul *swoons*

    Also, the end of the so-called small government Republican Party does not mean the end of the Republican Party.
    In fact, if y’all remember your Muhrican History, the Republicans started as a party that espoused the principle of Federal supremacy, while the Dems were conservative war mongers who were for States’ Rights.

    1. Great. National socialists vs. international socialists. Forward, march.

  33. Oh yeah! Well… Obama has a peace prize! Does Rand Paul have a peace prize!? Huh, huh???!!!

    Yeah, that’s right, baggers!

  34. Well, I’ve recommended that his next presidential campaign slogan should be “Vision 2020.”

  35. We can even create playlists of them so it will be very easy to find our videos which we like. We can also download those videos and can watch them offline. Showbox for pc

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