Memorial Day Observed, White House Locked Down, Eric Holder Slightly Praises Snowden: P.M. Links

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  • Arlington National Cemetery
    Public Domain

    It's Memorial Day, and remembrance events are happening across the country as U.S. troops continue serving in countries like Iraq and Afghanistan.

  • Former Attorney General Eric Holder says Edward Snowden performed a "public service" by triggering debate about domestic surveillance, a public service Holder nevertheless believes should be punished.
  • The White House was put on partial lockdown over a suspicious package.
  • Verizon and striking workers have reached a tentative agreement that may end a work stoppage if approved.
  • Australia is planning to auction off millions of dollars worth of seized bitcoins that were grabbed in a bust of a guy who was selling illegal drugs online.
  • X-Men: Apocalypse won the holiday weekend box office, despite (spoiler!) being awful and making no sense. Alice Through the Looking Glass is the big box office loser. It also appears to be awful and makes no sense, so there you go.

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    1. Damn America-hating libertarians don’t care about our brave troops and our heroic police officers.

      1. Wait, is this about cops too? When did that happen?

        1. Most likely, some cynical public-sector union hack deliberately tried to conflate relatively popular veterans with less-than-popular cops.

          1. People always sneak in their preferred group to heroes laundry lists like this, and I love it. I remember Peggy Noonan sneaking doctors and lawyers into her list of manly broad-shouldered working-class heroes, and I’ve been noticing it ever since. Conservatives love to add “businessmen,” leftists love to add “teachers” (which really isn’t that unfair if cops are on the list; teachers’ jobs are barely less dangerous or more secure and much harder). And, of course, there’s the “intersectional” fantasy conflation of interests of all oppressed groups that the Left has always loved to engage in–they even add leftist hobbyhorses that benefit **no one**, like environmental alarmism and animal rights.

    2. Hello.

      Working through a holiday.

      And on time no less. Unlike 5/17.

      I’m impressed.

      1. It’s not a holiday in Canada.

        1. I KNOW THAT.

          1. I didn’t know how much you knew about Canada.

        2. Canadians cannot afford holidays, all their efforts to gather whale blubber for warmth producing fuel must take precedence. And also, not having holidays is a slap in the face of the American imperialists who are obviously putting all their cities on the border as a threat to the people’s and the good polar bears of color’s revolution.

    3. Start working at home with Google! It’s by-far the best job I’ve had. Last Wednesday I got a brand new BMW since getting a check for $6474 this – 4 weeks past. I began this 8-months ago and immediately was bringing home at least $77 per hour. I work through this link, go to tech tab for work detail.
      http://www.realcash44.com

  1. X-Men: Apocalypse won the holiday weekend box office, despite (spoiler!) being awful and making no sense.

    Just like Trump.

  2. …a public service Holder nevertheless believes should be punished.

    Oh, he said service, not server.

    1. [slow clap]

  3. Happy BBQ-day Scott (and all)

    Beers for everyone

    1. I’m surprised they didn’t punish Rico and make him do the links.

      1. Punish? Doing them for a holiday weekend is a privilege

        1. You like working on holidays?

          1. If you think posting links is “Work”, I’m wondering where my overdue paychecks are

            1. When your work is your passion everyday is a holiday, or some similar motivational bullshite.

              1. We’re doing Servant Leadership where I work. It’s so…so…utterly a waste of time and complete bullshit just like very other program of that type that I’ve been involved in during my infrequent stints with large organizations. I put in 55-65 hours a week, I don’t need to be part of a team devising skits showcasing one of the tenets of the program.

  4. The White House was put on partial lockdown over a suspicious package.

    That package unfamiliar to White House occupants? Military service.

  5. It’s Memorial Day, and remembrance events are happening across the country as U.S. troops continue serving in countries like Iraq and Afghanistan.

    Do I detect a rebuke?

    1. A regret.

  6. Verizon and striking workers have reached a tentative agreement that may end a work stoppage if approved.

    But does this really improve the situation?

    1. Can you hear them now?

  7. Ummm…so how did they get the key to those btc? And what if the chain doesnt approve the auction transfers?

    I am really hoping for the latter.

  8. X-Men: Apocalypse won the holiday weekend box office, despite (spoiler!) being awful and making no sense.

    You could have left out the spoiler. We already knew.

  9. A pocket constitution?

    1. Re: That package unfamiliar to White House occupants? Military service.

    2. Is that a constitution in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

      1. “Yours is the size of the Constitution, *mine* is the size of the Code of Federal Regulations!”

    3. Nice…

  10. I just want to announce my frustration with Game of Thrones’s “rapidly advance the plot a lot in one episode”, then “do ‘mostly nothing’ in the very next episode”-seasonal pacing.

    1. Every sub plot seems to be about Girl Power.
      We had a girl outrun zombies while pulling a 200 pound load through the snow. We had another girl steal an entire fleet of SAIL boats while the idiot men turned their backs for a few minutes. Another girl is leading a war to take the North. Another girl killed a couple of dozen of the fiercest warriors in the world by burning them to death in a tent (couldn’t they just cut a hole in the tent with their swords and walk out, or throw a knife at her or something?). A new red woman.
      At least show some boobs.

      1. Maybe you get more done when you’re not spending all your time at the brothel

  11. Go out and enjoy the weather, you crazy sobs.

    Our community pool opened yesterday – started in 1961 – only the original sixty houses around it are shareholders, getting entry at a reduced rate. Anyone else has to buy in at the standard $420 for the season.

    It’s a great way to keep the poor people out. *happy sigh*

    1. It’s raining here.

    2. No way. There’s mosquitoes out there like something out of primordial nightmares.

    3. 60 houses sharing a pool?

      Ick.

      I hate being around people.

      1. I thought Canadian pools were full of gravy and maple syrup.

    4. Rich people can pee in the pool just the same as the poor.

        1. +1 Baby Ruth

  12. It’s Memorial Day, and remembrance events are happening across the country as U.S. troops continue serving in countries like Iraq and Afghanistan.

    Are you sure about that? i mean, hey I think the American public would know about it if we were at police action, amirite!

  13. The White House was put on partial lockdown over a suspicious package.

    Bill Clinton is visiting.

    1. Intern tush squeeze alert?

  14. File Under = World’s Shittiest Jobs

    The person who does the “Whale Necropsy

    1. with armed NOAA Fisheries law enforcement officers standing guard against bears

      Bears just trying to exercise their traditional right to washed up spoiled whale carcasses

  15. Back when defending both gays and smokers from unjust treatment were conservative causes.

    Today, smokers aren’t fashionable and they have no rights non-smokers are bound to respect. (Nor do people who sell untaxed cigarettes on the street)

    Gays have had better luck – it’s good to be fashionable.

    1. So chic is now a hollywood actor in sunglasses with a gay guy in his mouth?

      1. Yesterday my pal Doug came up for Memorial Day and brought his girlfriend, who vaped. She at first was going to go outside to do it, and I said, no, don’t bother, just do it in here. It was perfectly pleasant with no odor or smoke or anything untoward, of course. The only reason any sensible person would be against it, it seems to me, is because they’re bribed by Big Tobacco to do so.

  16. Last week the old man called me. Even though his house – which he designed and built in 1983 – isn’t up for sale, the guy next door, who is building a 4-story multi-million monstrosity, offered to buy it. My dad gets to pick the appraiser and the potential buyer will also add an extra bundle of cash on top of that. This guy apparently has money to burn and wants to get some more privacy.

    It’s tough – the land has been in the family since 1979 and I grew up running through those woods and playing on the beach. But with my parents’ advancing years it’s a hard deal to turn down.

    1. He’s only buying the property, not your memories man.

      1. Everything has a price!

    2. “I grew up running through those woods and playing on the beach. ”

      Is he paying enough for you to buy another place with access to woods and beach but maybe one with better weather?

    3. It’s tough – the land has been in the family since 1979

      Err…that’s all? Sell.

  17. Montco man charged in church-service killing

    Mark T. Storms was seated with his wife and son at the Keystone Fellowship Church in Montgomery Township on Sunday morning when he saw another member of the congregation causing a commotion.

    Storms approached the man, police said, asked him to step outside, and flashed a badge indicating he had a license to carry a concealed gun.

    He then pulled out his semiautomatic pistol and, police said, fired two deadly shots at Robert Braxton.

    “We’re talking about a church where there’s 250 to 300 people attending, and shots are being fired in a crowded area,” Montgomery County District Attorney Kevin R. Steele said Thursday as he announced charges against Storms. “It just doesn’t make a lot of sense to me to bring a gun to church.”

    1. Storms, 46, of Lansdale, was arrested and charged Thursday with voluntary manslaughter and reckless endangerment in the death of Braxton, 27, of North Wales. The maximum sentence on the manslaughter charge would be 10 to 20 years in prison.

      Storms’ arrest came after four days of investigation, Steele said, based on interviews with more than 50 witnesses who were inside the church.

      Steele gave he following account:

      Braxton, a member of the church, was sitting in a back overflow area when another congregant tapped him on the shoulder and told him he had taken an already-occupied seat.

      Ushers and others chose to clear the area and let Braxton cool down. But Storms, who is a church member but has no official role at Keystone Fellowship, approached him.

      Storms asked Braxton to step outside with him, and Braxton punched him in the face.

      Storms told police he was “trying to stop him because I was afraid he was going to hurt me and other people,” according to an arrest affidavit filed in the case.

      1. That’s why you never, ever, EVER go to a fucking church.

        1. Fucking church sounds like an interesting religion.

          Or is it just Catholic priests fondling the altar boys?

        2. We need sensible church control.

    2. flashed a badge indicating he had a license to carry a concealed gun.

      Moron

      1. I’m pretty sure that’s another crime on its own. A license to carry has about as much weight as a library card as far as “giving people orders”. worse – its basically a threat, saying that the fact that you’re armed implies you intend to use it unless the person being ordered complies.

        its also a confrontation that the shooter initiated. bad shoot x3.

  18. Net neutrality nitwits die hard:

    CRTC reviewing controversial ‘zero-rating’ in internet plans

    Telecommunication companies are increasingly offering customers attractive packages with unlimited music or video streaming.

    On the surface, this seems like a great deal for the consumer ? who doesn’t like unlimited streaming?

    But those advocating against this practice, known as zero-rating, say it seriously limits choice and stifles competition on the internet.

    1. *facepalm*

    2. Yes, you can’t offer anything for free to anyone unless everything is free for everyone.

  19. Emoji Bible translation to launch to help spread gospel to modern Christians

    An emoji Bible is about to be launched on May 29 by a mysterious person whose real identity is hidden behind an emoji wearing sunglasses.

    In a move that aims to keep up with the current trend of technology, a mysterious person has come up with an emoji translation of the Bible. Instead of the usual Oxford English or other standard languages, people can soon read the Bible in picture symbols, according to The Memo.

    Jesus died for your sins #LOL

    (Am I doing it right?)

    1. (0)-(0)
      ??
      ~~
      ———-
      V

      1. Well, that didn’t work.

    2. *you’re sins

      1. And so am i.

        1. + many sons of Father Abraham

    3. Still holding out for Emoji Marcus Aurelius, personally.

      1. When you arise in the morning

        1. Huh, the squirrels ate it.

          First good deed the squirrels have ever done.

      2. Emoji Mein Kampf!

        1. Emoji Proust?

    4. What’s the emoji for Yahweh?

  20. Did ‘Riders for America’ today, Peanuts.

    I might turn into a flag-wavin’ Republican someday.

    1. Thank you for your service.

    2. #NeverAddictionMyth. Derp Boink Bloop!

  21. Okanagan Indian Band says Ogopogo children’s book ‘misappropriates’ culture

    The chief of the Okanagan Indian Band is accusing Dorothy Hawes of cultural misappropriation.

    Hawes, a Victoria teacher and author, met with a representative from the Okanagan Indian Band before her book Ogopogo Odyssey was published.
    ogopogo

    Maggie Parr (left) and Dorothy Hawes, who met at a writers’ conference and collaborated on this book from their home bases in LA and Victoria respectively. (CBC)

    “[The book] misappropriates our culture and our beliefs and our structures,” said Chief Byron Lewis in an interview with CBC News.

    Strangely I don’t recall anyone opposing the Ogopogo statue at Atlantis Waterslides.

    1. Cultural Appropriation is for sale

    2. Misappropriates our culture is code for where’s our royalty check, right?

      1. The Okanagan can go fuck themselves. They didn’t invent the fucking dragon.

    1. Look, the Nordic states have solved their patriarchy problem. Now that 90% of their populations are not white Europeans and capitalism has been eliminated, they’ve reached utopia! Why doesn’t the USA want to do this?! Every modern country besides us has this!

  22. Lucy?

    Do Clinton Voters Care About War?

    In America, we do not lock up our murdering politicians. We rarely prosecute or impeach them. The only scandals that stick are sex ones. Serious voters, writers, pundits, and anyone else who feels as if they have deep principles invariably buckle under the partisan weight of the political system.

    She hasn’t yet been coronated, but Hillary Clinton is surely about to win the Democratic nomination. Sure, Sen. Bernie Sanders has given her an amusing amount of trouble. And though he’s voted for deaths abroad as well, he hasn’t voted for as many as Clinton. (This is not an argument for Sanders, but it is unquestionably an argument against Clinton.) Still, she’s got this thing in the bag, because she’s got party loyalty, and she may even win the hearts of a few lost, sad little neocons running away from Donald Trump.

    1. snip

      Clinton has done it all already. She voted for the worst foreign policy decision in recent memory, and she lamely apologized for it a few years later. Like most powerful people’s expressions of “regret” it meant nothing, and Clinton clearly learned nothing. If her time as Secretary of State is any way to judge (and it is), Clinton turns towards war whenever possible. It is never the last resort, and is quite often the first. Her pride in the Libyan invasion, which was based on the lie of a would-be genocidal Gaddafi remains. The instability, death, and terrorist empowerment that that wrought for Libya remains. Furthermore, choosing sides against (the loathsome) Bashar al-Assad helped that bloodbath continue. It is now on its sixth year. It is fueling a constant refugee crisis, and has destroyed Syria.

      1. Do Clinton Voters Care About War?

        Of course, they want more of it like all good neocons do.

        1. 2 minutes. 2 god damped minutes.

    2. Sure. They care about things they want more of.

    3. I was sitting in the pancake shop yesterday, overheard a pair of Clinton supporters discussing how the media is out to get her, and the “they” won’t let a woman be elected President.

      1. Those gals should support Janice Rogers Brown.

        If Janice Rogers Brown became President not only would she be the first woman President, she’d be the first President to be the descendant of American slaves – I’m sure that will get the Hillary supporters excited.

        1. The female Ben Carson?

          No thanks.

          Affirmative action needs to just go away.

          Just because one of your conservative icons is black is no reason to put them on some pedestal.

          See Barack Obama – he earned his way to the White House instead of obtaining his Senate seat the affirmative action ‘Tim Scott’ way.

          1. See Barack Obama – he earned his way to the White House instead of obtaining his Senate seat the affirmative action ‘Tim Scott’ way.

            HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

            So you’re also completely ignorant about Chicago politics? I’m sure you were delighted with the Nobel he earned as well. No Affirmative Action there, nossir, just honest hard work for years advancing the cause of peace. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

            1. Obama was duly elected, you dumbass Hebe.

              Granted, the GOP opponent wanted to have his wife gangbanged at a Swingers club (NTTIAWWT).

              Tim Scott got the SC Senate job because the GOP needed a token blaek for fundraising.

              1. Anti-Semite, anti-Semite, anti-Semite.

                Obama is really a neo-Cohen.

      2. Last time I overheard 2 Clinton supporters, they were lamenting over how Jeb Bush wasn’t doing so well and denying them a chance for their only good alternative. Last year, I saw one ‘Ready for Hillary’ sticker on a car. That one is gone and I have not seen a single, not one other, since. There are plenty of Bernie stickers around here. Not one Hillary sticker, in a most blue of blue neighborhoods. By this time in 2012, Obama/Biden 2012 stickers were everywhere I looked. Does this tell us anything? You be the judge.

        1. It tells me you need to get out more.

          1. Lick those cankles, buttface, lick em!

        2. I have noticed a distinct lack of Hillary swag around here. Far more Bernie stuff. I think Hillary bumper stickers are outnumbered by faded, peeling Obama ones.

          1. Yet Hil-Dog racked up 3 million more votes than the old Marxist geezer did.

            She got more votes than the Con Man did too.

            Seriously, primaries mean nothing insofar as general election predictions go.

            1. We were talking about California tomorrow.

              As for primaries, it seems telling that Democrat turnout is down and GOP turnout is up.

              1. She’ll still win.

                Yard signs don’t mean a fucking thing.

                In Cali, the large business community is almost exclusively pro-Obama and Hil-dog is the only TPP hope.

                they don’t put out yard signs in Redwood Shores.

                You should know this -but you don’t.

                1. Haahaahaaahaaaaa, ButtPig shilling for Hillary, just like I said it would! Hahaaahaahaaaa! Licke them cankles, shreeky, lick em!

        3. Last time I overheard 2 Clinton supporters, they were lamenting over how Jeb Bush wasn’t doing so well and denying them a chance for their only good alternative.

          Haha, right. No Hillary voter would actually consider voting for Jeb in a head-to-head. They rejected Republican milquetoasts for over 20 years, they can deal with the consequences of the reactionary backlash.

  23. Vigil held for shot gorilla Harambe

    EARLIER STORY: A vigil will be held Monday afternoon near the front entrance of the Cincinnati Zoo, to honor the memory of the 17-year-old lowland gorilla, Harambe, who was shot and killed by Cincinnati Zoo personnel after a child fell into the gorilla exhibit Saturday.

    “This is an action in response of a sensless [sic] death,” wrote Anthony Seta, creator of the event on Facebook. “I know how we are all angry and upset over this situation. This demonstration is in memory of Harambe. This is not a protest against the zoo.”

    1. The John Stuart Mill in me would have supported keeping Haambe alive and letting the little brat suffer the consequences.

      1. We already know what a mendacious little twat you are. Stop trying to prove it, there’s nothing left to do.

          1. Pay your bet, shitheap.

    2. “They killed the gorilla my dreams”

    3. The comments there have people demanding that the Mother be charged with “neglect” because the kid fell.

      1. There’s been all sorts of irrational comments regarding this gorilla. Some saying the kid or mother should’ve been the one killed, that the gorilla dying to save the kid is an example of “white privilege”, and that it was worth tranquilizing it then waiting a period of time.

        1. that the gorilla dying to save the kid is an example of “white privilege”

          Wait a second. Isn’t the kid that fell Black?

          1. Nope. But if the kid was black they would have just left him there.

            1. A cop would have shot the kid instead.

              1. No, the gorilla was black.

            2. Yeah, the kid is black. Check the video.

        2. I wonder if it hurts being that stupid?

    4. On a serious note, why not just keep these animals on wildlife preserves and have nature documentarians film the heck out of them – and have rich tourists pay to drive around and photograph (or in some cases hunt) the animals?

      Seems like a decent business model, and keeps the animals in the open air, out of their cages, and keeps random human tourists away too.

      1. About 20 miles east of Columbus is just such a place, The Wilds. It was built on a former coal strip mine that makes good use of otherwise very undesirable real estate.

    5. I’m sure the gorillas will appreciate it.

    6. Why didn’t those zoo guards have tranquilizer guns? Isn’t that standard equipment around large dangerous animals?

      I’ll bet NFL teams have them.

      1. The conventional wisdom is that in the few seconds it could take for the sedative to work, any number of toddler-damaging events could occur.

        The zoo was in a lose-lose-lose situation. I don’t think you can really fault them for taking the choice that minimized the risk to the child.

        1. In the video it seemed that the gorilla was treating the kid like a typical baby gorilla. A few seconds would not appear that risky. Do you know if they really had tranqs?

          1. Tranquilizer darts don’t work like they do in the cartoons. It takes time for the sedative to go through the bloodstream.

    7. Why no “sic” after “of”? The idiom isn’t “response of”.

  24. Because you haven’t enough DERP in your day:

    Inequality can cause rashes and urinary tract infections

    My infant son peed while I was in the middle of changing him the other night, causing me to think about inequality. I got the old diaper off, got the new one in place, started to fasten it … and realized he was peeing. So I sighed, and replaced the now-dirty second diaper, thinking “really, you couldn’t do this two minutes ago into the old dirty diaper?” I was unhappy with the environmental impact and the added minutes of 2 AM sleep I was losing to this process, but one thing I wasn’t thinking about was how to afford an extra diaper. Which is why inequality came to mind?because not thinking about that cost is a luxury many Americans don’t have.

    1. Life is an endless stream of consciousness novel for some people.

      Huh huh, *stream* of consciousness.

    2. My infant son peed while I was in the middle of changing him the other night, causing me to think about inequality.

      Jesus christ. I need another drink

      1. Americans are like so unequal, duhh, that, duhh, did you see the latest report? We have the worstest healthcare and every other country is better. I never been out of the county I live in, but the media told me this, so it’s true.

        /progtards

        1. I saw a Facebook may-may explaining that nothing bad ever happens in civilised-with-an-s countries.

      2. You know, that was my first thought upon reading that line as well. Except I had a few more expletives between ‘Jesus’ and ‘Christ’.

    3. Because I fucking love science, man!

    4. But he doesn’t use cloth diapers.

    5. “causing me to think”

      Nope

    6. One study found that 30 percent of women can’t always afford to change their children’s diapers as often as they’d like. There are no good answers to that dilemma.

      I was about to suggest one, but then I remembered the sacred dogma “my body, my right to choose, not my problem paying for it.”

      1. Wash the little rugrats off with a hose.

        1. My mother (who will turn 93 this year) used to shake her head and laugh at hearing new mothers (in the 1970s) complain about changing disposable diapers. She raised four boys in cotton diapers, and knew what was easy, and what was hard.

          1. If the object is to get little Johnny to go pody all by his lonesome, then cotton diapers rule.

    7. The double negatives are confusing me, but is she comparing her thinking about inequality to the plight of hypothetical people who can’t afford diapers?

      Also, if you can’t afford diapers in this country it could be that you’re spending too much on all the useless crap that people buy for their kids. I know someone who has already spent over a thousand on shoes for their soon-to-be-born child. They are not rich so I hope they saved the receipts.

      1. if you can’t afford diapers in this country…

        …then you are a stupid and selfish cunt for having kids.

        1. Hahahaha, nice.

  25. Seattle-based seafood company shuts down

    Great Pacific Seafoods, which reportedly had hundreds of Alaskan employees at three processing plants, has ceased operations.

    The company’s statement attributed its financial difficulties to “a significant drop in the price of roe due to the Russian embargo and the combination of the Japanese yen’s valuation and Japanese demand.”

    DeMatteis also said the company’s costs rose “due to the increase in the minimum wage and the elimination of the J-1 program,” a federal visa program that until recently allowed foreign students to work temporary jobs at Alaska’s fish processing companies. Alaskans voted in 2014 to raise the state’s minimum wage from $7.75 an hour to $8.75 in 2015 and $9.75 this year.

    1. costs rose due to the increase in the minimum wage

      And the economics profession rolls over in its grave.

  26. In Arctic Bay, Nunavut, precious pop sells online for stomach-churning prices

    As the supply of soft drinks slowed to a trickle recently in Arctic Bay, Nunavut, some residents of the community sold off cans and bottles at outrageous prices on Facebook.

    One seller recently held an auction for one 355 ml can and two 500 ml bottles of Coke and Sprite. Final price: $52.

    1. Nobody was forced to bid on it.

      1. Only a heartless libertarian thinks in absolutes.

    2. This is what happens when you restrict the supply of a good to promote ‘healthy lifestyles’. Note, a 16 year old, sometimes trades cigarettes for soda. No word on whether he’s a vodka or a whiskey guy though.

    3. This is what happens when you restrict the supply of a good to promote ‘healthy lifestyles’. Note, a 16 year old, sometimes trades cigarettes for soda. No word on whether he’s a vodka or a whiskey guy though.

      1. I guess they supply squirrels.

    4. What happens when the pops bubble pops?

    5. Global warming to blame, of course.

  27. Your mom is awful and makes no sense.

  28. Start working at home with Google! It’s by-far the best job I’ve had. Last Wednesday I got a brand new BMW since getting a check for $6474 this – 4 weeks past. I began this 8-months ago and immediately was bringing home at least $77 per hour. I work through this link, go to tech tab for work detail.
    http://www.realcash44.com

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