Law Firm Hires the First Robotic Legal Assistant

It's true: Lawyers don't need souls.

IBM's first artificially intelligent legal assistant, "Ross," was hired last week by the law firm Baker & Hostetler to help with their bankruptcy filings—work usually done by 50 employees.

If robots can be lawyers, what's stopping them from taking all the jobs?!

Check out, "Will Robots Take All the Jobs?."

Comments

[Playa Manhattan.]

I hardly think it's fair to call that Asian guy a robot.

[Jerryskids]

"If robots can be lawyers" is a question for the bar asociation and I'm pretty sure the answer is "Hell no!". The robot can never be more than a paralegal until that robot attends three years of law school and passes the bar exam. You think you can just waltz in here and have a non-lawyer doing legal work like practicing law without a license isn't a thing? Who told you to put the IBM on?

[Brochettaward]

Lawyers write the laws. They'll always have job security.

[robc]

Elect non lawyers to congress.

[Deep Lurker]

My worry isn't about robots taking all the jobs; my worry is about the law being something that requires computer assistance to understand and follow. The theoretical result would be unlivable for humans and the practical result would be a deeply corrupt society where certain elites and minorities (e.g. cops) would get a pass, and dissidents and dispised minorities would get arbitrarily hammered.

There's already too much of this today. We don't need more.

[Jerryskids]

It's not their intent to have laws you require computer asssistance to navigate, the intent is to have laws you require a lawyer to navigate. And I'm pretty sure we're already there.

[Playa Manhattan.]

Worry? It is upon us.

Try doing your taxes by hand. I dare you.

[DenverJ]

I can dance like a robot. See, I learned something in the 80's. Domo Arigoto, Mr. Roboto!

[AlgerHiss]

A robot lawyer would be the perfect fit for handling red light camera and speed camera tickets.

Automated tickets responded with an automated fytw.

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

I'm sorry, Dave, I can't do that....

[Notorious UGCC]

This robot's not to do well as a lawyer with an attitude like that.

/sarc

[Bra Ket]

Putting robots in charge of the military is one thing, but robot lawyers sounds sounds like a path to something very very dangerous.

[Hyperion]

It all depends on how much human slimeball you can program into a robot lawyer, and make sure to keep it devoid of morals and principles. If you can make them repulsive enough, they can take over all the lawyer jobs and then start running for office.

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

I think robots have too much emotion and feeling to ever really be good at lawyering.

Nope - I think lawyering will always require the soulless, evil touch of a human being.

[Hyperion]

I dunno, I think you can program a robot to be emotionless. In fact, I think you would have to program it to be emotional. Otherwise, it might just be the perfect new Soviet man. Isn't that in fact the goal of Marxism and communism? A completely classless, sexless society which exists only for the benefit of the great collective state? Isn't that what the progressives indeed want? Little gray houses for you and me, comrade.

[Derpetologist]

It's fun to remind people that the goal of communism is to remake society along the lines of a beehive. But every commy thinks he'll be the queen and not a drone.

[Hyperion]

I guess a few of them will get lucky. They might want to read up on some Stalin, Mao, and Pol Pot history to find out what happens to the unlucky ones. I know they don't teach that history stuff in school anymore, it's too much more important to learn how polar bears are drowning and biology is just a social construct.

[Derpetologist]

I sometimes wonder how jihadis would react to news of things like the transgender bathroom debate. They would probably see it as more evidence of how wicked and decadent the West is and how it is a decrepit civilization ripe for conquest.

On a side note, it turns out that the most popular TV show in Mozambique is The Simpsons. In many places, people assume that American TV shows are basically 100% true because why else would they put it on?

[Hyperion]

They will see it as more evidence of both decadence and weakness, of course. And I'm sure they're more than a little emboldened by watching most Western men being turned into spineless pussies. Unlike what a lot of leftists believe, testosterone actually does serve some useful purposes in society, a fact which is obvious to most of us.

[Derpetologist]

See also: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YP7OgnKCtcY

[Derpetologist]

You know the thing about a lawyer, he's got... lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he sues ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah... then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the come the depositions and the subpoenas and the injunctions and all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces.

Oh, Mr Almanian, I'll never set foot in a courtroom again.

[Mike A.]

The Butlerian Jihad begins in earnest.

[Crusty Juggler]

"Why does a divorce lawyer have grenades?"

"Because they're terrible people."

[Derpetologist]

OT: ISIS destroys another ancient monument

http://isis.liveuamap.com/en/2.....by-isis-in

And in amusing typos:

The cost of that fight was obvious as ABC News drove down street after street of flattened homes and schools, an estimated 6,000 buildings destroyed in total.

As ISIS fled, they blew up bridges and riddled the streets with improvised explosive devices (IUDs), more unexploded bombs than any other place on earth.

http://abcnews.go.com/Internat.....d=39120115

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

1) How's the army, Derpy? Hope all is going well and you're enjoying yourself.

2) I don't know why it makes me so angry when those neanderfuck ISIS cocksuckers destroy historic sites....but it makes me very angry when the neanderfuck ISIS cocksuckers destroy historic sites. They are people I actually enjoy seeing die. Rot in hell, you cave-dwelling, sub-human pricks.

[Hyperion]

You know how much destruction of ancient history resulted from the invasion of Iraq? I remember that very well. Museums with 5000 years of history completely destroyed, not so much by bombs as by looters and vandals in the chaos.

[sarcasmic]

mumble mumble intentions mumble mumble

[sarcasmic]

I'm in full agreement with 2. They are literally destroying history. We need an army of Indiana Joneses to execute every last one of the motherfuckers.

[Hyperion]

If you want to know about some really sad shit in that regard, read about what the Spanish did to Mesoamerican history. They literally destroyed everything they could of recorded history in the region because it was of de debil. They were very thorough.

[Derpetologist]

I kind of wish I could get deployed sooner. As it is, my language and other training will keep me in the US for the next year and a half or so. Turns out Pig-Latin* is a hard language to learn. I guess I should count my blessings.

Still, I don't feel particularly heroic in a cushy stateside post far from the war.

I met some officers the other day who are grads from the Swahili course. They found out I speak Swahili and want to start a club so they can practice. They just took the class, but since I lived there, they want to pick my brain about it.

*this is the code I use for the language I'm learning. I'm not supposed to say what it is.

[Notorious UGCC]

Please don't say Mandarin.

[Derpetologist]

1) I like the Army a lot so far. Best decision I've made in a while. And there's no derp like Army derp.

2) Boils my blood too. And hopefully I will get a chance to do something about it. In the meantime, enjoy this video of the Peshmerga wasting the lousy sons-a-bitches:

https://youtu.be/1sjhcJBvll8?t=7m

[Jerryskids]

Everybody knows IUD's are entirely defensive.

[Grand Moff Serious Man]

If robots can be lawyers, what's stopping them from taking all the jobs?!

Oh yeah? Then why did Data need Captain Picard to represent him in his courtroom trial in season 2's "The Measure of a Man"?

[Hyperion]

Picard's a pussy. With Captain Kirk there wouldn't have been need for any stinkin courtroom, he would have just kicked some ass, and took all the hot women.

[Notorious UGCC]

"Which reminds me, Captain, it's time for your deposition in the Princess of Xondor's sexual harassment lawsuit."

"I told you was too drunk to remember anything."

"As your robo-lawyer, I recommend you take the Fifth."

[Len Bias]

I hope they pay that robot a living wage.

[TGGeko]

I can't wait for robot defense lawyers to square off against robot prosecutors. The future of robot fights is here!

[lukashik]

And one of those applications is Showbox app. It is one of the best online streaming application for watching Movies and TV Shows. In the starting, this application has been released for only a few of the mobiles and allows users to watch shows online.