A.M. Links: EgyptAir Hijacking, Bernie vs. Hillary, Trump's Popularity Declines

Damon Root | 3.29.2016 9:00 AM

CNN

An EgyptAir flight en route from Alexandria to Cairo was hijacked and ordered to fly to Cyprus, landing in the port city of Larnaca. After a several hour standoff, Cyprus authorities arrested the hijacker.

Pakistan has detained more than 5,000 suspects in the wake of the Easter suicide bombing in Lahore.

Bernie Sanders hopes to poach Hillary Clinton's superdelegates by persuading them to transfer their loyalties to him.

Donald Trump's popularity is declining.

"Three years ago, on the eve of Obamacare's implementation, the Congressional Budget Office (CBO) projected that President Obama's centerpiece legislation would result in an average of 201 million people having private health insurance in any given month of 2016. Now that 2016 is here, the CBO says that just 177 million people, on average, will have private health insurance in any given month of this year—a shortfall of 24 million people."

The Chicago Teachers Union has called for a strike this Friday. According to the union, any member that crosses the picket line "shall be fined the pay earned on the days worked during the strike."

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Fist of Etiquette 8 years ago

Donald Trump’s popularity is declining.
Rico told us.
1. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
  
  Hello.
  “The Congressional Budget Office (CBO) projected that President Obama’s centerpiece legislation would result in an average of 201 million people having private health insurance in any given month of 2016. Now that 2016 is here, the CBO says that just 177 million people, on average, will have private health insurance in any given month of this year?a shortfall of 24 million people.”
  Er, is Root trying to frame this as a failure? Because this is total success in the bureaucracy.
  1. Raven Nation 8 years ago
    
    Good morning.
    Australia advances to final phase of AFC World Cup qualifying.
    1. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
      
      Good stuff. Two good friendlies on tap today. Por/Bel; Ger/Ita.
      1. Citizen X 8 years ago
        
        These masturbation euphemisms are getting pretty abstract.
        
        gaoxiaen 8 years ago
        
        One cup. Where are the two women?
      2. Rhywun 8 years ago
        
        What’s Eng/Ned, chopped liver?
        
        Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
        
        No, it isn’t. Just forgot about it. Mind you, Ned is not in a good mode right now.
        
        Rhywun 8 years ago
        
        Good. Even better, I hope they don’t let Rooney anywhere near the pitch.
        
        Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
        
        Nothing could be more English than starting him over Kane/Vardy.
      3. Private Chipperbot 8 years ago
        
        Did you happen to catch Anthony Mantha popping his cherry the other night? We’re hoping he can bring that QMJHL touch to Detroit. His grandpa was in the stands and shed a tear when he scored? Pretty cool getting your first goal against the Habs (and the game winner).
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS2Jf-Lm52Q
        
        Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
        
        No. I didn’t. Sylvio Mantha’s ghost strikes!
        The Habs under Therrien are unwatchable. Identity politics is finding its way back into Quebec these days (70% of PQ voters don’t want to increase immigration by 10 000 in a province that doesn’t exactly have leverage on that front). I mean, how else to explain David Desharnais getting more ice time than Pacioretty and Galchenyuk? It’s obscene. The Habs have been dead to me for years.
        
        thrakkorzog 8 years ago
        
        Yeah, well the thing about Arsenal is they always try to walk it in. Am I doing this right?
  2. JwoodchipperD 8 years ago
    
    Happy Easter Tuesday!
    1. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
      
      Are there any deals?
      1. Elspeth Flashman 8 years ago
        
        Our Lord died for your sins, that’s the best deal ever!
        
        BigT 8 years ago
        
        Can I get a refund? I miss my sins.
        
        JWatts 8 years ago
        
        Do you have a receipt? Because we only give refunds if you have a receipt.
      2. Private Chipperbot 8 years ago
        
        Only if you’re Polish and like to get wet and have someone whip you with pussy willows.
        
        Hamster of Doom 8 years ago
        
        Do you have to be full Polish, or is itr okay if you just enjoy a nice sausage?
        
        Private Chipperbot 8 years ago
        
        No; of course.
        
        Scarecrow & WoodChipper Repair 8 years ago
        
        What’s Shinola, chopped liver?
      3. gaoxiaen 8 years ago
        
        Discounted peanut butter filled chocolate eggs.
    2. Rhywun 8 years ago
      
      Easter Tuesday
      OK, now you’re just yanking our chain.
      1. Private Chipperbot 8 years ago
        
        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/?migus-dyngus
      2. Private Chipperbot 8 years ago
        
        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/?migus-dyngus
        
        Rhywun 8 years ago
        
        Dyngus Day is Easter Monday.
2. Crusty Juggler 8 years ago
  
  Trump 2016!
  1. SugarFree 8 years ago
    
    Racist!
  2. Chinny Chin Chin 8 years ago
    
    Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help! I’m being repressed!
    1. Elspeth Flashman 8 years ago
      
      Inherent? You mean incoherent!
    2. Roger the Shrubber 8 years ago
      
      My handle would be Dennis if anyone would get the reference.
      1. gaoxiaen 8 years ago
        
        The gay coke dealer?
      2. EMD 8 years ago
        
        The Menace?
      3. Swiss Servator 8 years ago
        
        Are you only 37?
        
        You Sound Like a Prog (MJG) 8 years ago
        
        *applauds, hands Swiss some lovely filth*
3. Trigger Warning 8 years ago
  
  When teachers strike, it’s for the children, right?
  1. Roger the Shrubber 8 years ago
    
    I’m currently living through a contract dispute in my school district where I have 2 kids attending. There was a 4 week work stoppage in October which has not resolved the dispute. ‘For the children’ is definitely their most used bargaining position. You have to pay to keep good, qualified teachers. This argument is used despite the fact that they are the the third best-paid teachers in a 3 county area, have a turnover rate that is almost nil, have at least 200 applicants for every opening, and can’t be fired for poor performance.
    Their other positions include:
    They shouldn’t have to accept a reduction in the rate of salary increases ($2500 per year for 5 years) that was negotiated in the previous contract by a school board that was completely replaced as a result of that agreement.
    They deserve a higher salary because the historical frugality of the municipality and school district has resulted in relatively low millage rates. That, coupled with the relatively high median income of residents means that they deserve higher salaries because the residents can afford higher teacher salaries.
    A 60% increase in employee health care costs is unconscionable. They fail to mention that their current costs are $35 per month.
    1. kbolino 8 years ago
      
      the third best-paid teachers in a 3 county area
      3rd best out of 3 = worst
      1. Roger the Shrubber 8 years ago
        
        I am aware that in some states the school districts are organized on a county level. In my state each local municipality has a school district that negotiates individually. So 3rd of 225+.
        
        kbolino 8 years ago
        
        Yeah I suspected that was the case. 3rd best out of 225 is quite a different story. I guess telling your teachers they’re in the top 1% won’t make any friends?
Bee Tagger 8 years ago

Donald Trump’s popularity is declining.
As his presidential chances rise.
1. Libertarian 8 years ago
  
  If that doesn’t scream “America!” then I don’t know what does.
Fist of Etiquette 8 years ago

An EgyptAir flight en route from Alexandria to Cairo was hijacked and ordered to fly to Cyprus, landing in the port city of Larnaca.
He did it to get a letter to his ex. Their postal service must be even slower than ours.
1. Florida Hipster 8 years ago
  
  I’m ashamed the American passengers didn’t beat him to death midair. It’s like people forgot 9-11.
2. Gordilocks 8 years ago
  1. Gordilocks 8 years ago
    
    If they had this lush of a pilot instead, they may have never left in the first place.
    Oh, and Squirrelz
    1. Florida Hipster 8 years ago
      
      Modern planes fly themselves.
      *knocks back another G&T, jumps in Cessna*
    2. Enough About Palin 8 years ago
      
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-WemyIbgJQ
    3. thrakkorzog 8 years ago
      
      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=i415QwSj0Og
Just a thought not a sermon 8 years ago

156) Ok, this LA Times article is from 2012 but I just came across it. The article’s about a cop gang in the LAPD with a “creed, which promoted aggressive policing and portrayed officer shootings in a positive light” and “in which deputies falsify police reports, perjure themselves and cover up misconduct.”
Don’t worry though, “past affiliation with such groups reaches the highest levels of the department.”
So the real question is, is this limited to the LAPD, or does these sort of internal gangs occur in other departments as well? (Maybe they’re actually fairly common, or is that pure paranoia?)
1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
  
  I’d be stunned if there weren’t internal gangs like that in every decent-sized police force in the country.
  1. Shirley Knott 8 years ago
    
    “Decent sized” == n 3
    1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
      
      I’d say 2, but I guess you’d need at least 3 to be considered a “gang”.
      1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
        
        If you hold it to 2, then most police cruisers meet the cut.
  2. gaoxiaen 8 years ago
    
    It happens in the military too.
2. Chinny Chin Chin 8 years ago
  
  Relax. That was before the new professionalism.
3. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
  
  Not the LAPD, it’s the LASD (sherriff).
  Who is probably the most abusive force in LA County.
  1. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 8 years ago
    
    Lee Baca is right up there in the pantheon of pigs with Joe Arpaio.
Fist of Etiquette 8 years ago

Bernie Sanders hopes to poach Hillary Clinton’s superdelegates by persuading them to transfer their loyalties to him.
Yeah, I’m sure they’ll line up to go against the Clinton Machine.
1. Lee G 8 years ago
  
  I prefer to lightly poach them with a dab of hollandaise sauce
2. Princess Trigger 8 years ago
  
  A horse head here. A horse head there.
  They’ll all fall into line.
  1. Brett L 8 years ago
    
    I stayed up way too late Friday night watching a cut of the Godfather trilogy on HBO that showed all the scenes in chronological order. I made it to the sleeps with the fishes before giving up. I haven’t loked to see if I can get it on demand.
    1. robc 8 years ago
      
      Isnt that the tv miniseries? Although that predated 3 I think.
      1. Brett L 8 years ago
        
        Is it? I didn’t make it to Sonny’s death so it was all 1 and 2.
        
        robc 8 years ago
        
        I just know that exists, no idea what hbo is showing.
3. Mainer2 8 years ago
  
  Senators and presidents don’t have men killed.
  Who’s being na?ve, Kay?
4. Glide 8 years ago
  
  By “persuade”, I assume he means shout loudly at them that the richest 50% of the candidate population has 90% of the superdelegates while playing air bongos.
  1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
    
    ‘Playing air bongos’ is the best euphemism so far.
5. R C Dean 8 years ago
  
  The Supes care about one and only one thing: backing the winner. If it looks bad enough for Hillary, they’ll switch.
  That’s the problem with building a machine out of fear and bribes: its fragile. When you can be outbid by a penny, it evaporates.
Bee Tagger 8 years ago

Bernie Sanders hopes to poach Hillary Clinton’s superdelegates by persuading them to transfer their loyalties to him.
After the first half of that sentence I really had expectations of a more clever plan.
1. Citizen X 8 years ago
  
  It’s Bernie Sanders. He wasn’t particularly bright even before the senility set in.
  1. Shirley Knott 8 years ago
    
    But look how well that worked out for Reagan.
    1. Citizen X 8 years ago
      
      -1 Evil Empire
      1. Shirley Knott 8 years ago
        
        Said demise having roughly nothing whatsoever to do with the alzheimer’s ridden old fool.
        
        Lee G 8 years ago
        
        LIAR! Reagan’s lofty rhetoric doomed them to the dustbin of history! Without his holy rule we would be just one more member of the Soviet Bloc.
        *dons St. Reagan charm necklace, recites the Nancyne Creed*
        
        Citizen X 8 years ago
        
        Hey, come on, he didn’t have Alzheimer’s yet while he was in office. He was just a regular old fool then.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        Yeah Shirly, Just ignore the long list of actual Soviet dissidents who say that Reagan did a lot of good and helped bring down the USSR. What the fuck do they know? Clearly some smug, butt hurt American knows better.
        
        Crusty Juggler 8 years ago
        
        That wrinkly, old, cankle-loving snore!
  2. gaoxiaen 8 years ago
    
    He’s better than Hillary, though I’m voting for Gary Johnson.
2. Doctor Whom 8 years ago
  
  He has a cunning plan, my lord.
  1. CE 8 years ago
    
    His plan is to raise federal spending (and taxes) by 50 percent per year. Because independent voters think the federal government is too small by half, apparently.
3. JwoodchipperD 8 years ago
  
  No one needs more than 23 superdelegates.
John 8 years ago

To those who are sometime lurkers on this board, Cytoxic is a 13 year old living in Canada. Don’t take what he says literally or you will end up like this guy.
http://www.breitbart.com/londo…..n-migrant/
1. Citizen X 8 years ago
  
  Oh, he’s 13 now? I didn’t even get to wish him happy birthday, or whatever they call it in Moosejaw.
  1. John 8 years ago
    
    Mentally he is still 10. But the clock still ticks even if his mind doesn’t.
    1. Crusty Juggler 8 years ago
      
      Desire is ageless.
      1. gaoxiaen 8 years ago
        
        True. I’m horny as a three-peckered billy goat at fifty-eight years old. Gym time really boosts the testosterone.
2. Rhywun 8 years ago
  
  WO IST MUH LAND GEGANGEN?
  1. Hamster of Doom 8 years ago
    
    *snortgiggle*
    *cleans up coffee*
3. CE 8 years ago
  
  Aren’t we all?
Lee G 8 years ago

The new OSHA silica rule is finalized. Prepare for the onslaught of silicosis attorneys.
1. Lee G 8 years ago
  
  Behold 606 pages of migraine-inducing, fine-generating, lawyer-enriching beauty
  1. IndyEleven 8 years ago
    
    But the rule itself *creates* 7.5 billion in value according to OSHA! Several more of these rules and we’ll be on easy street.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

‘It Works Every Time,’ Billy Dee Williams is back as Colt 45 spokesman
During his first tenure, Williams was criticized over the “every time” tagline, which some thought hinted at getting women intoxicated quickly.

The malt liquor’s alcohol level is indeed higher than some other beers,with a 5.6% alcohol content, compared to Miller Lite’s 4.2%. It is also sold in large sizes, including a 40 ounce bottle.

The 78-year-old swats away any criticism.

“You are always going to have people criticizing, in one way or another, for their own personal reason,” he told USA Today from Amsterdam, where he was attending a science fiction convention.
1. Brett L 8 years ago
  
  5.6% is high? Dos Equis is 5.5%. Talk about cherry picking.
  1. Citizen X 8 years ago
    
    It’s higher than “some other beers.”
    Notice it doesn’t say “good ones.”
  2. Ceci n'est pas un woodchipper 8 years ago
    
    5.6% is high if you only drink light American pilseners. 5.6% is maybe the high end of what you’d call a “session beer”. High is more like a Wee Heavy, which comes in around 8%.
    1. Brett L 8 years ago
      
      Oh yeah. The shoft from American megabeer to craft beer snuck up on me for the first year. 6 bottles of Bud Light, I’m fine. Six pints of stuff averaging 7.2% and I’m stupid. So 2 extra beers by volume and 2 extra beers by ABV = no wonder I felt like I drank a twelve pack.
  3. Zeb 8 years ago
    
    And I’m pretty sure you can still get a 40 of Steel Reserve, which is like 10%.
  4. EMD 8 years ago
    
    Duvel is 8.5%
2. Lee G 8 years ago
  
  Mickey’s Big Mouth with the old-timey laceration-causing pull tops is the malt liquor for me.
  1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
    
    +1 bloody laceration in the web of your finger that keeps bleeding for a week.
3. Just a thought not a sermon 8 years ago
  
  “which some thought hinted at getting women intoxicated quickly.”
  No!
  By the way, anybody know where I can get a yellow, long-sleeved Colt 45 t-shirt like Spicoli wore in Fast Times?
  1. SugarFree 8 years ago
    
    Hier
    1. Just a thought not a sermon 8 years ago
      
      Thanks!
  2. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
    
    Do you need a shoe to hit yourself in the head with?
4. Zeb 8 years ago
  
  I was disappointed to learn that it was named after a football player’s number and not the gun.
  1. EMD 8 years ago
    
    What difference, at this point, does it make?
5. Rhywun 8 years ago
  
  78-year-old
  What?! That ain’t right.
6. gaoxiaen 8 years ago
  
  Is that a fortune cookie quotation?
7. R C Dean 8 years ago
  
  I bet a sci-fi con in Amsterdam is epic. Way to roll, Billy Dee.
  1. Brett L 8 years ago
    
    Who dowsn’t want to be, er, neck deep in European cosplay girls?
Fist of Etiquette 8 years ago

The Chicago Teachers Union has called for a strike this Friday.
A DRONE STRIKE.
1. jarflax 8 years ago
  
  +1 literacy
Just a thought not a sermon 8 years ago

“Bernie Sanders hopes to poach Hillary Clinton’s superdelegates”
I prefer mine over easy.
Citizen X 8 years ago

Bernie Sanders hopes to poach Hillary Clinton’s superdelegates by persuading them to transfer their loyalties to him.
Let us know how that works for you, Bernie.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Sex will be GONE within 30 years as designer baby-making replaces old-school bonking
It’s the unmentionable physical act that’s inspired generations of musicians, artists, writers and reality television stars.

But it turns out that procreative sex might soon be a distant memory as humanity ditches nookie and produces babies using more predictable scientific methods.

Henry Greely, a professor of law and genetics at Stanford University, has penned a book called The End of Sex and the Future of Human Reproduction in which he claims that within “twenty, maybe forty, years most people in developed countries will stop having sex for the purpose of reproduction”.

Rather than introducing sperm to egg through the sweaty and often awkward rigamole of rumpy-pumpy, couples will instead head down to a laboratory where a scientist will make a baby for them.
1. Citizen X 8 years ago
  
  It’s so cute that they think people will stop having sex once it’s unrelated to procreation.
  1. Lee G 8 years ago
    
    I think it’s cute that they think teenagers are going to stop getting pregnant in the back seat.
    1. invisible furry hand 8 years ago
      
      You can’t get pregnant in the back seat, only the front seat.
      1. straffinrun 8 years ago
        
        +1 Learned something
      2. coloraDOOM 8 years ago
        
        Swiss!
        
        Swiss Servator 8 years ago
        
        *narrows gaze*
  2. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
    
    Um, no, X, he said people will “will stop having sex for the purpose of reproduction”.
    People will still have sex for fun. Porn ain’t goin nowhere!
    1. EMD 8 years ago
      
      Porn ain’t goin nowhere!‘
      Porn is boring.
  3. Zeb 8 years ago
    
    Despite the headline, I can’t imagine anyone would suggest that might happen.
2. Just a thought not a sermon 8 years ago
  
  “couples will instead head down to a laboratory where a scientist will make a baby for them”
  Cunning plan scientists, but what are you going to do when the cool kids give you noogies instead?
  1. robc 8 years ago
    
    That is what we did. I already have my where do babies come from answer: a lab in Nashville.
    Babyc is 12 weeks old today.
    1. Ceci n'est pas un woodchipper 8 years ago
      
      Congrats! Funny, I’m heading to Nashville tomorrow. Maybe I’ll pick up another while I’m in town.
      1. R C Dean 8 years ago
        
        If you wait till late summer you’ll get a better deal as they clear out old inventory to make room for the 2017 models.
3. Raven Nation 8 years ago
  
  Actually, it’s global warming which is killing our sex drive.
  1. Just a thought not a sermon 8 years ago
    
    Shouldn’t that mean that global warming is self-corrective, as lowered global libido reduces the human population?
  2. WTF 8 years ago
    
    Ah, yes, is there anything it can’t do? Other than actually make the climate warmer, I mean.
  3. CatoTheChipper 8 years ago
    
    Wow! Climate researchers have discovered that ambient temperature above 80 degrees F reduces fertility. Finally science has an explanation for why population density is so low in the Indian subcontinent and SE Asia.
4. Mickey Rat 8 years ago
  
  You stopped working on flying cars…for this nonsense?!
5. gaoxiaen 8 years ago
  
  Sex is for fun. Babies are unfortunate. +1 Brave New World.
6. Butts Wagner 8 years ago
  
  Demolition Man is correctamundo again
Fist of Etiquette 8 years ago

Pakistan has detained more than 5,000 suspects in the wake of the Easter suicide bombing in Lahore.
That’s going to be a lot of iPhones to unlock.
1. Swiss Servator 8 years ago
  
  Round up the usual suspects….and the unusual suspects…and any bystanders.
Bee Tagger 8 years ago

According to the union, any member that crosses the picket line “shall be fined the pay earned on the days worked during the strike.”
This is quite the teachable moment for the students so who gets fined for that?
1. Drake 8 years ago
  
  How exactly would the union collect the fines?
  1. WTF 8 years ago
    
    Like they collect their dues – automatic paycheck deduction.
  2. KerryW 8 years ago
    
    According to the article, they throw them out of the union and only collect if the people want to be reinstated.
    1. Roger the Shrubber 8 years ago
      
      If they are unable to prevent the former union member from working, this seems like an excellent way to destroy your own union.
      1. kbolino 8 years ago
        
        It would be a delicious irony if a union were broken by such “collective action”.
    2. Griffin3 8 years ago
      
      In the fine print, you learn that, when they are thrown out of the union, they cannot lose their jobs, but they lose their rights to vote in the union. But they still have their union dues deducted from their paychecks. How’s THAT for a dastardly plan?
2. Libertarian 8 years ago
  
  FINALLY, a “teachable moment” for public school students.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Man takes Taser away from police
Coburn reportedly continued to pull away from deputies. When he balled up his fists, as if ready to throw punches, officers used a stun gun on him.

He was tased two more times for allegedly refusing to remain on the ground and two more times for reportedly refusing to be handcuffed.

According to the affidavit, when officers attempted to tase him a sixth time, the 6-foot-2, 195-pound Coburn still had enough strength to grab a taser from an officer’s hand. That’s when a second officer pulled out his firearm and Coburn complied with their demands to lay on the ground.
1. Brett L 8 years ago
  
  Jesus. This guy is still alive? I’m impressed. We should raise money to send these cops a medal.
  1. Florida Hipster 8 years ago
    
    Leesberg is pretty small. I doubt that have a union that gets them out of straight up murder like Jacksonville.
2. Hamster of Doom 8 years ago
  
  What was his crime? Jaywalking? Looking at the cops in a funny way?
  Officers said they went after him for his own well-being….
  Checking out the after pic, they failed.
  1. Brett L 8 years ago
    
    Obviously it was Disrespect of Cop.
  2. KDN 8 years ago
    
    Police found Coburn and his girlfriend arguing in the restaurant. Coburn’s girlfriend then decided, in front of officers, that it would be best for the couple to go back to their separate homes.
    When the woman drove off in her car, Coburn ran through five lanes of traffic in an attempt to stop her vehicle, the affidavit states. Officers said they went after him for his own well-being in an attempt to pull him out of traffic, but he refused.
    Florida Man arrested for doing Florida Man things.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Bank Freezes Online Payment Over Dog’s ‘Terrorist-Sounding’ Name
Bruce Francis, who has multiple sclerosis, was transferring money from his Chase Bank account to his dogwalker and he put the 9-year-old pitbull’s moniker “Dash” in the memo line.

Bank officials thought Dash sounded a little bit too much like Daesh, the Arabic term for the self-described Islamic State, and canceled the payment.

Chase also flagged the payment with the U.S. Treasury Department, which placed a note on Francis’ account asking him to “explain what Dash means.” Once Francis explained to officials at the department’s Office of Foreign Assets Control (OFAC) that Dash was his dog’s name, his payment was processed.
Derp.
1. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
  
  “Daesh” is also the DEROGATORY term for ISIS used by those that want to beat them. WTF?!?! Its not in SOLIDARITY, ffs!!
  1. WTF 8 years ago
    
    Morons gonna moron.
  2. Hamster of Doom 8 years ago
    
    They might have been able to enrich themselves. That’s their job. You can’t expect fine detail to get in the way of them doing their job.
  3. Just say Nikki 8 years ago
    
    “Daesh” is also the DEROGATORY term for ISIS used by those that want to beat them.
    Yeah, that’s not at all true and you fell for retarded rumor.
    1. Lord Humungus 8 years ago
      
      If you can’t say something nice…
      1. Just say Nikki 8 years ago
        
        The rule is not operational in linx threads.
    2. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
      
      Cite needed, BEYOTCH!!!
      1. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
        
        From the Mirror :
        “Daesh is an acronym for the Arabic phrase al-Dawla al-Islamiya al-Iraq al-Sham (Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant). Essentially, it’s another word for ISIS – but apparently one that ISIS militants do not favour.”
        So suck it, Nikster…
        
        Just say Nikki 8 years ago
        
        They also “do not favor” calling it ISIS.
      2. Just say Nikki 8 years ago
        
        It’s nothing more than the exact translation of ISIS, or an acronym of the long full Arabic name ISIS members themselves use. The only real argument for its offensiveness is that people don’t use acronyms as readily in Arabic, so an acronym might seem less respectful than the full name. But ISIS is an acronym too.
        
        Monty Crisco 8 years ago
        
        WRONG AGAIN:
        “Depending on how it is conjugated in Arabic, the word can mean “to trample down and crush.” But it can also mean “a bigot.” ISIS has reportedly threatened to cut out the tongues of anyone it hears using the term. ”
        http://www.nbcnews.com/storyli…..te-n463551
        SO SUCK IT AGAIN!!!
        
        Just say Nikki 8 years ago
        
        If you could stop begging for sex long enough to read, you’d see that claim was debunked in my second link.
        
        Monty Crisco 8 years ago
        
        Which was subsequently RE-bunked! Deny that they threaten cutting people’s tongues out for using the word so it CAN’T be derogatory. I’ve had Kurds explain to me that that is EXACTLY why they refer to them as “Daesh”
        YOU’RE A RETARDED RUMOR!!!
    3. Zeb 8 years ago
      
      John Kerry seems to think it’s legit.
      1. R C Dean 8 years ago
        
        I don’t take linguistic advice from John “JinJis Con” Kerry.
        
        Zeb 8 years ago
        
        No, I just thought it was funny when all of a sudden, out of nowhere, he and a few others started using “DAESH”
2. straffinrun 8 years ago
  
  I named my female dog Yellin. Can a bitch get a bone?
  1. Swiss Servator 8 years ago
    
    “It looks like you have been wired $10,000,000,000. Something about ‘QE’?”
    1. jarflax 8 years ago
      
      Spend all you like we’ll make more
3. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
  
  Mr Francis said that while it was an inconvenience, he understood why such measures are put in place.
  “I think anything we can do to stop the terrorists and the funding of terrorists, let’s do it,” he told KTVU.
  “And if it means an inconvenience to me and my dog walker then that’s a price I’m totally willing to pay.”
  Useful idiots…
  1. EMD 8 years ago
    
    “Something Something”
    – Benjamin Franklin
4. BigT 8 years ago
  
  Here, BiteThePig, Here BiteThePig! C’mon boy!
Monty Crisco 8 years ago

Greenberg and Golic debating the criminalization of texting while walking in NJ. Greenberg – that fucking prototypical liberal fag – says he is guilty of this more than anyone. Goes on to say we absolutely need that law. Golic trying to make the argument that maybe adults can take responsibility for themselves and we don’t need the law. Every subsequent guest that comes on the show – including a black guy, Bruce Bowen – endorses passing the law because we have to “do something” about rampant texting and walking.
That will be the last line on my suicide note should I be found dead by my own hand.
1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
  
  Your first problem is that you were listening to Mike and Mike.
  Greenberg is insufferable. He may be the dumbest pundit in sports media. Do you realize how bad you have to be to be the dumbest pundit in sports media?
  1. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
    
    +1 FULL POINT
  2. John 8 years ago
    
    I don’t mind them. Greenberg is not bright but he is mostly harmless. And how dare you disrespect Mitch Albom like that. Mitch has spent over 30 years establishing his creed as the dumbest person in sports journalism and he deserves more respect than to think a neophyte like Greenberg could even be in his league of stupidity.
    1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
      
      Albom is stupid emeritus. But ever since he started writing sappy books I’ve ignored him as a “sports” pundit.
      1. John 8 years ago
        
        Okay, but Peter King is on the line and he is not happy.
        
        Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
        
        Woody Paige would like a word.
        He makes Meatball and Man-Girl look like rocket sugeons.
        To top it off, he’s a fuckin Donkos fan.
        
        jarflax 8 years ago
        
        I’ll see your Greenberg and Albom and Paige, and go all in with Keith Olberman.
  3. Mickey Rat 8 years ago
    
    Mike Lupica exists.
    Greenberg is the quintessential New Yorker, always thinking the world and sports can be perfected if we can just figure out the right set of rules.
    1. KB Check Release 8 years ago
      
      True story:
      I am friends / fraternity brothers with Nick Lupica, mike’s nephew.
      Nick is a great kid and basically said in a nice way that nobody likes his uncle in the family.
Anarcho-Woodchipper 8 years ago

According to the union, any member that crosses the picket line “shall be fined the pay earned on the days worked during the strike.”
But they stand up for the little guy, remember?
1. Mickey Rat 8 years ago
  
  Except for those who think for themselves, damned free riders!
Bra Ket 8 years ago

“After further investigation we will know more about them,” he said. “…If someone is found to be guilty they will be charged.”
The ordering here seems wrong.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

An Experimental Autism Treatment Cost Me My Marriage
Before the T.M.S., I had fantasized that the emotional cues I was missing in my autism would bring me closer to people. The reality was very different. The signals I now picked up about what my fellow humans were feeling overwhelmed me. They seemed scared, alarmed, worried and even greedy. The beauty I envisioned was nowhere to be found.

Seeing emotion didn’t make my life happy. It scared me, as the fear I felt in others took hold in me, too. As exciting as my new sensory ability was, it cost me customers at work, when I felt them looking at me with contempt. It spoiled friendships when I saw teasing in a different and nastier light. It even ruined memories when I realized that people I remembered as funny were really making fun of me.

And the hardest thing: It cost me a marriage. When I met my former wife (a decade before the T.M.S.), she was seriously depressed. She’d accepted my autistic even keel, and I accepted her often quiet sadness. I never really felt her depression, so we complemented each other.
1. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
  
  Guy reminds me of Shallow Hal after his friend snaps him out of the hypnosis that Tony Robbins put him under…
2. WTF 8 years ago
  
  Sounds like he still can’t read emotional cues, except now he’s misinterpreting instead of just missing them.
3. Drake 8 years ago
  
  Am I a bad person for laughing? The guy finally realized he married a moody bitch – and that’s bad?
4. Bra Ket 8 years ago
  
  That entire article can be easily rewritten into a positive one by viewing all his complaints in a different light. “An Experimental Autism Treatment Helped Me Finally Start Living”.
  Suspicious that some TMS sessions can accomplish all that though. Unless they fried something in there by accident.
  1. Just say Nikki 8 years ago
    
    That entire article can be easily rewritten into a positive one by viewing all his complaints in a different light. “An Experimental Autism Treatment Helped Me Finally Start Living”.
    “..and I discovered living sucks.”
    Seriously, why would you contradict his own opinions about his own life? Because you’re terrified that maybe living does suck?
    1. Ceci n'est pas un woodchipper 8 years ago
      
      To be fair, maybe the it’s the way he’s living that sucks. Myself, I’d say I’m pretty content with life, all things considered.
    2. EMD 8 years ago
      
      “Because you’re terrified that maybe living does suck?”
      I think you just have to choose that it doesn’t, and go from there. Because the alternative is frankly, useless.
    3. kbolino 8 years ago
      
      Because you’re terrified that maybe living does suck?
      WTF does this even mean?
      Life sucks. If you let reality terrify you then you have no purpose for drawing breath.
5. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
  
  “She’d accepted my autistic even keel, and I accepted her often quiet sadness. I never really felt her depression, so we complemented each other.”
  Now that’s a recipe for success!
  1. Ceci n'est pas un woodchipper 8 years ago
    
    Remember, when you combine independence and cooperation you get codependence.
6. Griffin3 8 years ago
  
  So he’s a libertarian now?
Brett L 8 years ago

Holy Shit. The Economist writes something I agree with.
1. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
  
  Wonder what stifles competition in a “free” market… DID THE ECONOMIST REASON THAT ONE OUT?!?!?!
  1. Brett L 8 years ago
    
    Don’t go spoiling it looking for perfection.
    1. Brett L 8 years ago
      
      Although rent-seeking is mentioned and the effects of regulatory capture are also given a sentence.
SugarFree 8 years ago

You only dislike Hillary Clinton because she’s so AWESOME!
And if you wade into the comments, you can get even more delusion such as:
Jaydee
You cannot like her for any reason you’d like, but if those are your true reasons, I’d like to see an explanation. How is she untrustworthy? Because she had a private server that has now been raked over the coals and shown to have been used for entirely lawful and normal purposes? Or the poor judgment of the Iraq War, which she has since come to publicly repent?

Shall we compare her to the trustworthiness of the likes of Trump or Cruz? Or shall we hold her judgment up against Bernie’s – the guy who thought it would be a brilliant idea to primary Obama in 2012 ?

The problem isn’t that people (especially men) dislike her. It’s that their reasons are so emotional and unexamined, yet so passionate. There is more going on than rational disagreement.
There’s at least three formal fallacies. Can anyone spot them all or more?
1. Lee G 8 years ago
  
  I only see one, argumentum fullum shittum
  1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
    
    If you can see all three at once, it’s like entering the drive chamber of the Event Horizon.
    Also allows you to play 4D Obama Chess.
2. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
  
  “Or the poor judgment of the Iraq War, which she has since come to publicly repent?”
  If the premise of the argument is trustworthiness, this statement seems to blindly assume that repenting was because she committed a wrong and not because it is politically expedient to repent for it now (which would bolster the argument for untrustworthiness).
3. Night Elf Mohawk 8 years ago
  
  I’d go with “I dislike her because she doesn’t unconditionally believe women who state that they were sexually assaulted” just to see if I could start a civil war.
  1. WTF 8 years ago
    
    “I dislike her because she enabled her husband’s serial sexual assaults and attacked and vilified his victims. ” Really go for the gold.
    1. SugarFree 8 years ago
      
      A few people tried that: This comment has been deleted
      1. WTF 8 years ago
        
        But of course.
    2. Illocust 8 years ago
      
      They’ve tried this before. Jaydee is one of their regulars, and according to her, this is different because evil Republican conspiracy.
4. BigT 8 years ago
  
  This may shock you:
  Hillary Clinton is fundamentally honest
  Jill Abramson
  
  This was in my FB feed yesterday. I almost puked. Worse: my daughter ‘liked’ this.
  Where, oh where, did I go wrong?
  1. Mickey Rat 8 years ago
    
    Is it because Hilary is so sociopathic she believes whatever nonesense is spewing from her mouth?
5. R C Dean 8 years ago
  
  Because she had a private server that has now been raked over the coals and shown to have been used for entirely lawful and normal purposes?
  You see stupidity this profound, all you can do is walk away.
Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago

“The Chicago Teachers Union has called for a strike this Friday. According to the union, any member that crosses the picket line “shall be fined the pay earned on the days worked during the strike.””
This makes my loins ache for the age of the Pinkertons.
1. Citizen X 8 years ago
  
  They’re busy.
  1. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
    
    God, what has happened to The Onion? Or did they just assign a 15 year old intern to do that write-up? (sigh)
    1. Rhywun 8 years ago
      
      Aren’t they an organ of the DNC now?
2. EMD 8 years ago
  
  They’re Securitas now, and they’re probably driving around your company’s parking lot, making sure no one is stealing catalytic converters.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

North Koreans told to prepare for new ‘arduous march’
In an ominous echo of famine in the 1990s, the sanctions-hit regime is telling citizens to be ready to ‘chew the roots of plants once again’
“The road to revolution is long and arduous”, an editorial in the state-run Rodong Sinmun newspaper stated on Monday. “We may have to go on an arduous march, during which we will have to chew the roots of plants once again”.

The Chosun Ilbo, a South Korean newspaper, reported that every citizen of Pyongyang is being ordered to provide 1kg (2.2lb) of rice to the state’s warehouses every month, while farmers are being forced to “donate” additional supplies from their own meagre crops to the military.

There are also reports of North Koreans hoarding food supplies due to fears of another famine, while the regime has started to crack down on the open-air markets that serve as an important source of additional food for city-dwellers and have been tolerated in recent years.
1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
  
  How else do you expect them to feed Kim Jong Un, if not by starving the rest of the populace?
2. Suthenboy 8 years ago
  
  This sounds reminiscent of the insanity out of Cambodia from the late ’70’s.
  I predict mountains of skulls.
3. Lee G 8 years ago
  
  Let North Korea serve as an example of how communist dictatorships can survive indefinitely at the expense of their populace.
4. Illocust 8 years ago
  
  Thousands will die, but nothing will change because the military gets fed.
  1. ant1sthenes 8 years ago
    
    Too bad there wasn’t a way to poison the grain after it was collected, in such a way that it would all be consumed before it was detected.
invisible furry hand 8 years ago

‘It was like being struck in the groin area with a cricket ball’: Police chief accused of ‘hitting his colleague in the crotch when the pair walked past each other at work’ in bizarre bullying case
1. Crusty Juggler 8 years ago
  
  Giving evidence on the first day of the hearing, Sen Const Kirk said Insp Lonergan had taken aim at his genitals seemingly at random between 12 and 15 times, when the pair passed each other in the station’s corridors.
  Not cool, bro.
  1. Brett L 8 years ago
    
    What a pussy. Hit the motherfucker back with your knee and see if he still wants to play.
    1. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
      
      Yeah, if someone hits me unprovoked they can expect a response of a physical type. This is the first fucking rule of nature!
      1. Brett L 8 years ago
        
        Well, its a violation of the NAP.
        
        0x90 8 years ago
        
        People who violate a nap deserve whatever they get.
        
        Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
        
        If you’re gonna retaliate, set it up proper.
        “Hey, you ever been to the orient? You know, Thailand..? Myanmar..?
        BANG-COCK?! ” *backhand to the balls*
John 8 years ago

Sad and funny that with all of the pants shitting over Trump, an actual fascist won a bunch of Democratic primaries last week and no one seems to care.
http://pjmedia.com/instapundit/230187/
Bernie Sanders is a no kidding fascist. He hates capitalism, embraces the total state, has an army of faux intellectuals and gullible young people he is unleashing on the country, and he is a nationalist not an internationalist. That is what an actual fascist looks like.
What happens if Hillary is forced to withdraw and Bernie is the nominee? What are the never Trump people going to do then? Confronted with an actual fascist, and one who like all real fascists and communists do has the backing of the intellectual establishment, their pants shitting over Trump is going to look a little foolish.
1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
  
  What happens if Hillary is forced to withdraw and Bernie is the nominee? What are the never Trump people going to do then?
  My plan is ritual suicide.
  1. John 8 years ago
    
    Trump is a bad candidate but they all are. Trump is not, however a fascist and not much of a danger to the Republic or the country. He might actually be a breath of fresh air. Sanders in contrast is a nasty hateful sick old man. Shitting your pants over him getting elected dog catcher much less President should cause some pants shitting. Too bad so many people shot their credibility social signaling about Trump, because if they are confronted with Sanders, they may wish they had some of it back.
    1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
      
      The one thing I can say about Trump is that absolutely nothing will get done. Wither Team Red or Team Blue control the halls of Congress, there will be gridlock. But the President’s been given so much damn power, and Trump, whether or not a fascist, is a moron.
      Trump-Sanders is a worst case scenario. I’m still voting Johnson in that scenario.
      1. John 8 years ago
        
        But the President’s been given so much damn power, and Trump, whether or not a fascist, is a moron.
        I don’t see why people say that. I really don’t. I don’t see how Trump is any more of a moron than most of the other candidates. Cruz was a real shark and hack lawyer. I wouldn’t call him stupid. Hillary has fucked up every job she has ever had. Sanders is a bum and has been his entire life. Have you ever heard Rubio talk without prepared remarks? He is dumb as a post.
        What about Trump says he is a moron? Who is the moron, the guy who says maybe letting any Latin American who wants to come across the border is a bad idea that is going to let some really bad people in the country, or the people who think the very idea that anyone from south of the border might be undesirable is racism and fascism?
        Who is a moron, the person who looks at half the country being on the dole and thinks maybe watching millions of manufacturing jobs go overseas and letting in endless supplies of cheap labor is a bad idea or the people who look at the situation and think we just need more of the same?
        There are a lot of morons in politics. Trump is not one of them or if he is, not the biggest one by any measure.
        
        BigT 8 years ago
        
        Hillary has fucked up every job she has ever had
        
        Monica, Jennifer, Kathleen, etc. being prime examples.
        
        OneOut 8 years ago
        
        ‘Cruz was a real shark and hack lawyer’
        citation needed
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        I was being charitable. He argued before the Supreme Court. He was a political hack out of Harvard who made his bones in the Bush DOJ. I assume he is smart, but I don’t blame you for doubting my proof.
        
        cavalier973 8 years ago
        
        What I find ironic is that, while Trump complains about Mexican rapist murderers, Cruz has actually been instrumental in making certain that a Mexican rapist murderer got the death penalty, when he won the case before the Supreme Court.
        
        OneOut 8 years ago
        
        What proof ?
        Have you read about his tenure at the FTC ? He received accolades from Rs and Ds alike.
        Read about his efforts and accomplishments with respect to Internet freedom and protecting small Internet business against those who were trying to use the power of the Fed Gov. to push them to the sidelines in favor of the corporate interests.
        People who actually put a little effort into learning the truth about Cruz are often pleasently surprised since most of the media coverage is written by liberals interviewing and or quoting establishment Rs who do not wish to have their gravy trains run dry.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        Oneout,
        I meant “shark and hack lawyer” as a compliment. I assume he is a smart guy and a good lawyer.
        
        cavalier973 8 years ago
        
        …thinks maybe watching millions of manufacturing jobs go overseas…
        What about the millions of jobs lost to automation? Is Trump going to do something about that?
        
        You Sound Like a Prog (MJG) 8 years ago
        
        Who is a moron, the person who looks at half the country being on the dole and thinks maybe watching millions of manufacturing jobs go overseas and letting in endless supplies of cheap labor is a bad idea or the people who look at the situation and think we just need more of the same?
        To answer the question: you are.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        Yes MLG,
        The ideology is never wrong. God forbid you ever think about anything. That is hard. Better to adopt an ideology and let it do your thinking for you.
        It is not that you are stupid. Lots of people are dumb. It is that you choose to be stupid.
      2. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
        
        “The one thing I can say about Trump is that absolutely nothing will get done.”
        I actually disagree with this. I think Trump’s identity is so psychologically grafted to this notion of “Dealmaker” that, in combination with his complete lack of political principles, he will view signing anything as an accomplishment.
        
        Just say Nikki 8 years ago
        
        This.
    2. tarran 8 years ago
      
      Trump is not, however a fascist and not much of a danger to the Republic or the country.
      Donald Trump *is* a fascist. It’s not like there’s a Heisenberg exclusion principle at work here where only one fascist can be in the race at a time.
      There are many flavors of fascism; the common feature is their reactionary approach towards crises and governance.
      You keep fretting about what happens when Americans decide the rule of law doesn’t matter and decide to adopt a looter’s persepective toward governance. You’re seeing it. Both Trump and Bernie promise to stick it to their respective constituancy’s enemies.
      Bernie is more dangerous than Trump, granted. But in no way does Bernie’s fascism in any way deny Trump’s.
      1. John 8 years ago
        
        Not all interest group politics is fascism. And who has Trump promised to stick it to? Sorry but deporting people who are here illegally is not fascism. I know you think it is and you don’t recognize borders but most people do recognize borders and don’t see enforcing them as fascism.
        I would also say that if you really hate Trump and don’t want him elected, I would strongly advice you and the rest of his critics to stop it with the fascism nonsense. You are just playing into Trump’s hands. Most people don’t pay much attention to the election or the candidates until at least the convention. By building Trump up as the American Peron, you are doing nothing but lowering the bar for him to look reasonable and make you and the rest of his critics look ridiculous once the actual campaign starts this fall.
        You watch, Trump will go after his opponent but otherwise come across as Mr. Reasonable and the rest of the country who don’t obsess about politics will wonder what all of the fuss was about. Calling your opponents fascists makes you feel good but it generally isn’t very effective.
        
        tarran 8 years ago
        
        Sorry but deporting people who are here illegally is not fascism
        Trump has promised much more than that.
        He’s threatened war with Mexico; made coy noises about expelling adherents to a major religion, even if they are here legally or citizens; he’s threatened to shut down newspapers that were critical of him; the list goes on.
        I think your advice to tone things down is well intended if aimed at the wrong people; if you want people to stop painting Trump as a fascist, you’d be well advised to share that counsel with him; because it’s his statements as to how he would govern that are screaming “I’m a fascist” that are prompting people to call him a fascist.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        He’s threatened war with Mexico;
        Mexico has failed to stop multiple armed incursions across the border. We went to war with Mexico in the early 20th Century for that very reason. Mexico’s failure to control the nacro gangs and to stop the resulting armed incursions into American territory are acts of war. It is still a bad idea to go to war with Mexico over this, but it is not fascism. Again, defending your border is not fascism.
        made coy noises about expelling adherents to a major religion,
        No, He has said we should reconsider allowing Muslims to immigrate to this country, which is something that the country has done in the past. The Johnson Reed Act of 1924 more or less banned anyone from the Middle East and by extension most Muslims from immigrating here. I guess we can add Calvin Coolidge to the long dark night of American fascism.
        he’s threatened to shut down newspapers that were critical of him;
        No he hasn’t. He has threatened to sue people for libel and to change the standard for public figures to be the same as they are for everyone, meaning public figures would no longer have to prove reckless disregard, only that the story was false and damaged them. That is a debatable notion but it was the law in this country until the early 60s. Its not fascism.
        Just stop it. You sound unhinged when you make these claims.
        
        Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 8 years ago
        
        John, you sound unhinged when you defend Trump like this.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        Really Bobarian? How is that?
        Is it not true that Mexico is unable to prevent armed incursions into the US? And did we not go to war with Mexico over just that issue in the early 20th Century? Why is it unhinged to think Calvin Coolige, who signed an immigration bill that is much more restrictive than anything Trump is proposing, was not a fascist?
        And lastly, since when is NYT v. Sullivan all that is standing in the way of the dark night of fascism in America?
        Explain how anything I said wasn’t reasonable or shut the fuck up. The truth is what it is. It doesn’t suddenly become not true because it interferes with your fantasy that you are fighting the great fascist menace when you object to Trump.
        
        KDN 8 years ago
        
        Trump will go after his opponent but otherwise come across as Mr. Reasonable and the rest of the country who don’t obsess about politics will wonder what all of the fuss was about.
        Setting aside the technical point over whether Trump is a fascist (I lean towards yes, fwiw), I anticipate that this is exactly what will happen.
  2. Drake 8 years ago
    
    I’m still assuming that the DoJ will wait until Hillary has the nomination sewn up – then indict her so Obama can pick whoever he wants.
    1. John 8 years ago
      
      Obama can’t do that. The delegates have to pick the nominee. I don’t think the Hillary delegates are going to be too interested in Obama’s wishes after his DOJ indicts their candidate.
      1. Drake 8 years ago
        
        She may have to throw the thing to Biden in return for a pardon.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        Maybe. But I am not sure Biden would be Obama’s choice. I have always thought Biden was the most dangerous candidate. But now I wonder. If Hillary bows out, I think the Bernie supporters will walk away and sit out the election if the nominee is anyone but Bernie. And that would kill Biden’s chances in the fall just as surely as the Trump supporters sitting out would kill a GOP nominee’s chances.
    2. kinnath 8 years ago
      
      The DOJ indicts Clinton, then the Wookie throws her hat into the ring at the convention. She is nominated by voice vote.
      1. R C Dean 8 years ago
        
        – 2 detached arms.
2. Shirley Knott 8 years ago
  
  To whom?
  And why should anyone care?
  The same people will lose this election as have lost all the preceding. The people.
3. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
  
  Every poll I had seen up to a few weeks ago has Trump losing to Bernie too. If the question is one of electability, shouldn’t it actually be posed to Trump and his supporters why they wouldn’t kindly withdraw and support a GOP candidate that actually can beat this Greater Evil?
  1. Shirley Knott 8 years ago
    
    Which would be whom, exactly? And how would it be better?
    1. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
      
      Who would beat Bernie? According to the polls Rubio (prior to his dropping out) and Kasich. Would it be better? In the sense that a dropper of strychnine is better than a glass of it.
      1. WTF 8 years ago
        
        National polls are meaningless for two reasons:
        1. The President is not elected by popular national vote, he is elected via state by state electoral vote. So a lead in national popular polling doesn’t mean what people think it does.
        2. The election is still 7 months away. I believe national polls had Reagan losing to Carter by 20 points six months prior to the election.
        
        Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
        
        I’ll cede the second point. On the first, Trump is getting his ass worked in statewide polls as well. Those are a hell of a lot harder to discount.
        
        EMD 8 years ago
        
        Trump’s support is greater in anonymous online polling. I think there’s a lot of phantom support out there for him from cowards unable to bring themselves to tell their friends and loved ones they are Trump supporters.
        
        R C Dean 8 years ago
        
        This here. I suspect that if Trump is the nominee, his actual performance in the election will be significantly better than the polls predict.
  2. John 8 years ago
    
    You misunderstand my question. The point is that if it is Bernie versus Trump, what will the never Trump crowd say then? Hillary as bad as she is, is nothing compared to Sanders. When confronted with an actual fascist, what will the people who have invested so much of their personal identity in believing that Trump is a fascist do? I honestly don’t know.
    1. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
      
      I got you, John. And I understand I’m circumventing the binary choice. I just refuse to believe the choice is binary. I also fail to understand why, for months now, every poll out there has Trump losing a hypothetical matchup to Hillary and Sanders while most of the GOP field polls ahead of them yet Trumpeters continue to crow “Get in line! It’s the only way we’ll beat the Democratic scourge!”
      Trumpeters criticism of the NeverTrump crowd is that they are sore losers or that they are going to die on principle and subject us to the horrors of Hillasanders. My criticism of Trumpeters is that if Trump can’t beat Hillasanders – and nearly every poll out there indicates he’s due for a severe case of prison discipline in November – THEY are the ones being sore losers and are going to die on principle.
      1. John 8 years ago
        
        And the answer to your criticism is that the Trump people view the alternatives as no better than Hillary. What is the point of rallying behind someone who will screw you just as badly as Hillary?
        My question assumes Trump is the nominee. If he is not, then my question should also be posed to the Trump supporters who say they will walk away if Trump isn’t the nominee. I think if the Dem nominee is Sanders rather than Hillary, any Trump supporter who claims they will walk if Trump isn’t the nominee needs to reconsider that. The Trump supporters will look a lot less foolish doing that than the Never Trump people will, since the Trump supporters never claiming their opponents were fascists and the Never Trump people did.
        
        Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
        
        Wait, do Trumpeters actually think that Ted Cruz would be equally as bad as Hillary? I can entertain in my mind the argument that Rubio, Jeb, Kasich et al would just be the same policy tripe served by Hillary only with different condiments. But Cruz? The guy that is apparently so “establishment” that he is detested by the vast majority of Washington for refusing to compromise?
        Cruz may not be likable but if Trumpeters believe he is the same thing as a vote for Hillary then they are either 1) so blindly two-issue nationalist/protectionist or 2) so mind-numbingly stupid that I honestly fear for the genetic line of a third of our country.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        Wait, do Trumpeters actually think that Ted Cruz would be equally as bad as Hillary?
        Not necessarily. He is better than the alternatives. I don’t think they trust him, especially on trade. Cruz voted for cloture on TPP and then voted against it. If he is actually against it, why did he vote for cloture when he knew it would pass?
        The problem is the party screwing Trump out of the nomination. If Cruz were to win it legitimately, most of Trump supporters will vote for him.
        
        NotAnotherSkippy 8 years ago
        
        Whichis the answer to your question to the nevertrump camp. He is no different than hillary. Trump is a dangerous joke on so many levels.
        
        John 8 years ago
        
        Trump is a dangerous joke on so many levels.
        I think he is different than Hillary. And the only danger he poses is the danger that conservative activists and journalists will no longer claim to own the Republican party and demand all its candidates pay homage to them. Since I am not one of those, I really don’t care.
  3. Just say Nikki 8 years ago
    
    If the question is one of electability, shouldn’t it actually be posed to Trump and his supporters why they wouldn’t kindly withdraw and support a GOP candidate that actually can beat this Greater Evil?
    Sure. But then Trump lies and says he wins all the head-to-heads, the media barely challenges him, and they all move on.
    1. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
      
      ^So this
      (sigh)
4. WTF 8 years ago
  
  What are the never Trump people going to do then? Confronted with an actual fascist, and one who like all real fascists and communists do has the backing of the intellectual establishment, their pants shitting over Trump is going to look a little foolish.
  They’re going to do what they’ve been doing all alomg, claim that Trump is the Fascist and that the violence Sanders supporters cause at Trump event is the fault of Trump and his Fascist followers. There is no intellectual honesty to be had here.
  1. NotAnotherSkippy 8 years ago
    
    Painting trump as the voice of reason and liberty is laughable. I have never seen a pathological liar of trump’s level in any election in my lifetime.
    1. John 8 years ago
      
      I have never seen a pathological liar of trump’s level in any election in my lifetime.
      Do you not have cable? Seriously, what possibly could cause you to believe that? I am sorry but there is no rational justification for thinking that. There just isn’t.
      You want to talk about a pathological liar? How about Mitt Romney. Go compare what he said to get elected in Massachusetts to what he said when he ran for President. It is like they are two different people. How could anyone who isn’t a pathological liar manage to change their public positions and persona that radically? And no doubt wake up every day convinced they are the one honest man in the room, which I have no doubt Romney does.
Crusty Juggler 8 years ago

Root’s steak of coming in last on the alt text leaderboard continues.
Respect.
1. Florida Hipster 8 years ago
  
  Mm. Failure.
  *drool*
2. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 8 years ago
  
  Mm. Steak.
  *drool*
Libertarian 8 years ago

Is the electorate a victim of some gigantic game of 3-card monty? While all eyes have been on Trump, is Sanders going to become the next President?
1. Azathoth!! 8 years ago
  
  No.
Doctor Whom 8 years ago

Now that 2016 is here, the CBO says that just 177 million people, on average, will have private health insurance in any given month of this year?a shortfall of 24 million people.
And the coverage is often so bad as to be unusable, as even the NYT acknowledges. GOBAMA!
Crusty Juggler 8 years ago

‘Commander, you are SUCH a tease!’ How Gen Petraeus was nicknamed James Bond by the socialite who felt his quads over dinner – and who exchanged 30,000 flirty emails with another top general
1. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 8 years ago
  
  “Kelley claims in the book that she and Petraeus ‘tested each other’s muscles to see who had the hardest quadriceps, while our spouses looked on in tolerant amusement, as they understood our athletic competitiveness’.”
  Your spouses sound like morons.
2. Just a thought not a sermon 8 years ago
  
  Another testimonial to the value of squatting.
  1. WTF 8 years ago
    
    Warty approves.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Where do I sign up?
Texas welfare mom reveals how much money she gets per month, smokes pot instead of working
You ever feel like maybe the politicians are the really stupid ones?

Recently, an Austin, Texas welfare recipient called in to “Austin’s Morning News” radio show and described why she lives off the government dole.

The 32 year old mother with three kids is on welfare just like her parents. Probably, her kids will do the same. And why wouldn’t they? People who go to work every day are the fools, she insists? she gets paid to sleep late, hang around all day and smoke weed.

Listen to this shockingly honest admission:
1. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 8 years ago
  
  So…is there any evidence her claims about this are true, or do we believe anonymous callers to morning radio shows when their assertions fit our narrative?
  1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
    
    Yeah, this is too “perfect”. It’s a troll.
    1. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
      
      Most likely. But I have come to a point where I never underestimate 1) the stupidity of people, 2) the desire to get attention through what should otherwise be shameful admissions, and 3) their belief that their anonymity is ironclad and their behavior will go without consequence.
    2. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
      
      But if its not a troll who WOULDN’T wanna get with that gal?!?!
2. WTF 8 years ago
  
  By the way, the politicians aren’t the stupid ones here. They’re getting themselves elected by buying the votes of these people with the tax money taken from the productive class.
3. EMD 8 years ago
  
  she gets paid to sleep late, hang around all day and smoke weed.
  Probably in a quasi-hovel. I’m sure there’s a PS4 and a big-screen TV, but it’s not like she would ever evolve from that form of existence.
  I too think it’s a troll, but let’s not act like living on the dole is some amazing lifestyle that affords you all sorts of opportunities.
  1. NotAnotherSkippy 8 years ago
    
    She’s Gillespie’s perfact woman.
    I can verify that my wife is dealing with a patient just like this as we speak. He has a curable medical condition that he does not want cured because that would mean losing his disability. He also expects the state to providr food and shelter and a personal care assistant.
Irish ?s Lauren Southern 8 years ago

“Donald Trump’s popularity is declining.”
Too bad it might be too late and all this means is he’ll lose by even wider margins to Hillary or Bernie.
lafe.long 8 years ago

Overwatch: Blizzard to Remove Character Tracer’s Victory Pose From Upcoming 1st-Person Shooter
Game director Jeff Kaplan confirmed the removal on the shooter’s forum, citing player feedback that criticized the pose as overly sexualized, adding the developer will “continue to try to do better.”
1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
  
  Meh. Private company doing something that will probably get them good press from Kotaku and make them more money. Silly, but don’t really have an issue with it.
  1. UnCivilServant 8 years ago
    
    A: No one reads Kotaku anymore.
    B: Even among people who do, less than 3% base buying decisions on the prattle of the gaming press.
    1. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
      
      Meh. Maybe you’re right.
      This won’t stop me from giving Blizzard money, because stupid Hearthstone ruining my life grumble wish I’d never found that game grumble ok here’s $50 for the pre-order for the new set grumble
2. UnCivilServant 8 years ago
  
  Blizzard needs to grow a spine and tell these whiners to piss off – they don’t buy games anyway, so ignore their bitching.
  1. KDN 8 years ago
    
    It’s an actual customer complaining about a single out-of-character art element, and argues against similar changes to other characters. I personally think it’s a bit silly, but considering that it’s a small change and this character is being configured to appeal to people like the poster, it’s actually good business to do so.
3. lafe.long 8 years ago
  
  I’m guessing there are also no teabagging emotes ingame.
  1. Private Chipperbot 8 years ago
    
    Teabagging is all manual. Crouch, stand, crouch stand…
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Strudel and Sauerkraut! (and goosestepping?)
Germany wants refugees to integrate or lose residency rights
German Interior Minister Thomas de Maiziere said he is planning a new law that will require refugees to learn German and integrate into society, or else lose their permanent right of residence.

The initiative comes after voters punished Chancellor Angela Merkel’s conservatives in regional elections earlier this month, giving a thumbs-down to her open-door refugee policy and turning in droves to the anti-immigrant party Alternative for Germany (AfD).

Around 1 million migrants arrived in Germany last year – many fleeing conflict and economic hardship in the Middle East and Africa – and de Maiziere said around 100,000 more had arrived so far this year.

Germany expected that in return for language lessons, social benefits and housing, the new arrivals made an effort to integrate, he told ARD television.
1. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
  
  This is the time on Sprockets ven ve dance…
2. Old Mexican Mighty Aggressor 8 years ago
  
  Germany expected that in return for language lessons, social benefits and housing, the new arrivals made an effort to integrate, he told ARD television.
  
  Do Germans really expect Muslim refugees to become atheistic and multicultural pussies in exchange for lessons in German and a house?
  1. WTF 8 years ago
    
    “Vee haf vays uf makink you assimilate.”
lafe.long 8 years ago

Fulton, New York: Nurse Convicted of Taking Photo of Unconscious Patient’s Penis Surrenders License
Kristen Johnson surrendered her license Monday as part of a plea deal, in which she pleaded guilty to misdemeanor disseminating of unlawful surveillance photos.
1. Je suis Woodchipper 8 years ago
  
  seems extreme.
2. Heroic Mulatto 8 years ago
  
  Umm…she can take pictures of my whatever-she-wants when I’m conscious anytime.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Cities begin to challenge a bedrock of justice: They’re paying criminals not to kill
The odds were good that Lonnie Holmes, 21, would be the next person to kill or be killed in this working-class suburb north of San Francisco.

Four of his cousins had died in shootings. He was a passenger in a car involved in a drive-by shooting, police said. And he was arrested for carrying a loaded gun.

But when Holmes was released from prison last year, officials in this city offered something unusual to try to keep him alive: money. They began paying Holmes as much as $1,000 a month not to commit another gun crime.

Cities across the country, beginning with the District of Columbia, are moving to copy Richmond’s controversial approach because early indications show it has helped reduce homicide rates.

But the program requires governments to reject some basic tenets of law enforcement even as it challenges notions of appropriate ways to spend tax dollars.
1. UnCivilServant 8 years ago
  
  Dangeld didn’t work to keep foreign raiders at bay. What makes them think it will work for local marauders?
2. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
  
  In any other scenario if you had to pay someone to keep them from committing a crime it would be called extortion. And that NEVER breeds more of the same behavior. NEVER.
3. Monty Crisco 8 years ago
  
  We have a winner!!! I never thought I would say it, but this is the STUPIDEST public policy I have EVER seen! Well done, Richmond!!
  Also, make it harder to get guns!!!
4. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 8 years ago
  
  “$1,000 a month”
  So he gets a free $12,000 a year. Is that in addition to other welfare he may be eligible for? If this guy goes out and gets a $10 an hour job, almost 38% of his income will come from his ‘don’t shoot people’ check. Committing gun crime then asking the government to pay you not to do it again seems like a pretty good career plan in some disadvantaged neighborhoods.
5. Hamster of Doom 8 years ago
  
  Four of his cousins had died in shootings. He was a passenger in a car involved in a drive-by shooting, police said. And he was arrested for carrying a loaded gun.
  I’m not seeing an actual crime here.
  Holmes is worried about how he’ll afford the $500 monthly car payments and insurance once the program ends. He has applied to get a job as an Uber driver.
  
  Holmes hits up Vaughn for $5 for a quart of oil. Vaughn tries to use it as a teachable moment and reaches into his pocket.
  *facepalm*
6. Hamster of Doom 8 years ago
  
  Four of his cousins had died in shootings. He was a passenger in a car involved in a drive-by shooting, police said. And he was arrested for carrying a loaded gun.
  I’m not seeing an actual crime here.
  Holmes is worried about how he’ll afford the $500 monthly car payments and insurance once the program ends. He has applied to get a job as an Uber driver.
  
  Holmes hits up Vaughn for $5 for a quart of oil. Vaughn tries to use it as a teachable moment and reaches into his pocket.
  *facepalm*
7. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 8 years ago
  
  “I decided $1000 is not a living wage.”
Irish ?s Lauren Southern 8 years ago

Emory dean tries to put The Chalkening in perspective, fails miserably.
“Second, some of the chalkings on Emory’s campus were a violation of university policies, certainly not because of the content, but because the chalkings were done in unacceptable locations and without reserving the space. Our guidelines concerning public messaging are crucial to maintaining open expression.
Third, many students who are members of marginalized groups have encountered intolerance much of their lives. These lived experiences inform their campus activism. At Emory, like many other institutions, students have been subjected to bias incidents based on various aspects of their identities, including race, religion, disability, sexual orientation and political views. Such acts — both overt and subtle — take a profound toll on students on campuses that they genuinely want to embrace as home and haven.”
Guidelines that restrict open expression are necessary to maintain open expression, you guys.
1. Old Mexican Mighty Aggressor 8 years ago
  
  “[…] many students who are members of marginalized groups have encountered intolerance much of their lives. These lived experiences inform their campus activism.” Ajay Nair, dean of campus life, whatever the heck that means
  
  One would not fault people for saying “what a condescending, arrogant, self-righteous bastard” but, unfortunately, most people on campus are condescending, arrogant, self-righteous bastards who also think “minorities” are like pets, to be cuddled and protected.
2. Juvenile Bluster 8 years ago
  
  Man, that man has a talent for using a lot of words to say absolutely nothing. Trump should hire him as a speech writer.
3. Night Elf Mohawk 8 years ago
  
  Supposedly, that Emory dean pulls down about $350K in annual compensation.
4. ant1sthenes 8 years ago
  
  “These lived experiences inform their campus activism.”
  They’re college students. About 10% of their lived experience was spent shitting on themselves.
  1. Lord at War 8 years ago
    
    For 30% of their life, they believed in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny
Old Mexican Mighty Aggressor 8 years ago

The Chicago Teachers Union has called for a strike this Friday. According to the union, any member that crosses the picket line “shall be fined the pay earned on the days worked during the strike.”

That’s the kind of friendly threat that endears the Teachers Union to its members and the public. Good for them!

Donald Trump’s popularity is declining.

Maybe he should say again that Mexicans are after our white daughters and his popularity may recover. At least, among that kind of crowd.

Bernie Sanders hopes to poach Hillary Clinton’s superdelegates by persuading them to transfer their loyalties to him.

His going to win them over using his youthful charm and good looks. Or maybe by simply saying in his raspy, old uncle voice “Come on, people! Hillary? For cryin’ out loud!”

Pakistan has detained more than 5,000 suspects in the wake of the Easter suicide bombing in Lahore.

Captain Renault’s orders!
1. Hamster of Doom 8 years ago
  
  Doing them all at once doesn’t count as a first, but you definitely get the extra credit.
straffinrun 8 years ago

The Cops are doing some not so nice things.
1. straffinrun 8 years ago
  
  Police department’s hoax about contaminated meth leads to 1 arrest
2. EMD 8 years ago
  
  Admiral Akbar, call your office!
3. SFC B 8 years ago
  
  I’d seen that posted to my local PD’s facebook and I seriously considered taking in some rock salt to have it tested. Then I remembered that would be so very, very stupid.
Hamster of Doom 8 years ago

Mexicans celebrating an Easter ritual late on Saturday burnt effigies of U.S. Republican presidential hopeful Donald Trump, whose anti-immigrant views have sparked outrage south of the American border.
Mexico has declared war!! Everyone FREAK THE FUCK OUT!
First comment:
For years I have been an advocate of invading and colonizing that failed narco state. It would be cheaper to the taxpayer and preserve our country from ruin.

At the very least, Ramos’ citizenship should be stripped.
Sure. Why not.
1. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 8 years ago
  
  “For years I have been an advocate of invading and colonizing that failed narco state. It would be cheaper to the taxpayer and preserve our country from ruin.”
  Okay. The population of Mexico is 122 million. The median income in Mexico is $5000. That means we’d basically be paying out hundreds of billions of dollars in welfare payments since 85% of Mexico’s population make below the US poverty line.
  In what sense is colonizing a country with 1/3rd of your population going to be cheaper than what’s going on now?
  1. Lee G 8 years ago
    
    The retarded sense, it’s the sixth sense.
  2. tarran 8 years ago
    
    If the U.S. were to invade Mexico, once again Ghost in the Shell’s predictions will prove true.
2. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 8 years ago
  
  Real geniuses over there.
  “I agree with Drifter. If there is ANY country that truly needs a good American occupation for a while, it’s Mexico. Don’t get me wrong, I like and appreciate Mexicans, but Mexico is a politically corrupt narcostate that would truly benefit from us sending a few divisions down there to sort that place out once and for all.”
  The Mexicans would benefit from having their soldiers shot to death and their cities bombed, you guys.
  1. Lee G 8 years ago
    
    Pax Americana bitches. It’s good for you.
    *slaps badass bumper sticker on truck*
    1. Citizen X 8 years ago
      
      PIEDRA, BANDERA, Y AGUILA!
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Being Lazy at Work Is Actually Good, Says Study
In a new study published in February’s issue of Nature, agriculture professor Eisuke Hasegawa found that widespread laziness in ant colonies can actually make the group stronger?the lazy ants act as reinforcements when the hard-working ants get burnt out.

The study found that 20 to 30 percent of ants in a colony spend their time grooming or just lying around, but under pressure they get shit done?a phenomenon mirrored by workplace procrastinators. So go ahead, take a longer lunch, go down a Reddit rabbit hole, or check up on your Tinder profile?it might just be the cure to your already boring job or essential to office camaraderie.
1. UnCivilServant 8 years ago
  
  Was it always the same ants, or did they rotate between on shift and off shift?
2. Old Mexican Mighty Aggressor 8 years ago
  
  Being Lazy at Work Is Actually Good, Says Study
  
  Yeah. The trick is getting paid…
3. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 8 years ago
  
  I tried the workhorse, ever-reliable, overtime beats mode and got nowhere. So I’m just taking my sweet damn time for the last month or so and I feel much better.
4. John 8 years ago
  
  One of the great German generals, I think it was von Moltke the elder but I am not sure, said there were for kinds of officers in any Army, three of which were essential and one that had to be eliminated. They were
  1. Smart hard working officers
  2. Smart lazy officers
  3. Stupid lazy officers
  4. Stupid hard working officers.
  The first three were essential. You needed smart hard working officers to fill your staff and ensure the work got done. You needed smart lazy officers because they being lazy would not just take every situation as it was and were not afraid to think of new and easier ways to do things, where the smart hard workers would just grind through using the current way of doing things. You needed the dumb lazy officers to fill unimportant jobs and free up the smart officers for more important jobs. Sure they were dumb but since they were lazy they didn’t do any damage.
  The fourth type had to be ruthlessly eliminated from any military organization. The dumb hard working officer didn’t just fill a spot like his lazy counterpart but worked and actually damaged the organization,.
  1. lap83 8 years ago
    
    Based on my experience, the world seems to encourage the dumb hard working types to go into management.
  2. R C Dean 8 years ago
    
    I trot that out periodically in my hospital. I always credit it to Clausewitz. No idea, really, who said it. My version goes like this:
    You need dumb and lazy people because somebody has to keep an eye on the parking garage.
    You need smart and lazy people to be field marshals. They know how to delegate.
    You need smart and energetic people to be staff officers. They get the work done.
    You can’t have dumb and energetic people in your organization. They need to be fired.
    1. John 8 years ago
      
      It was not Clausewitz. I had always credited it to Paul von Manstein. But someone corrected me and said it was Moltke the elder, which makes sense.
      Clausewitz would have never said something like this. It is too practical and too witty for Clausewitz.
    2. Akira 8 years ago
      
      RC, I’ve heard you talk about being in some sort of administrative role in a hospital. What’s your job, exactly? Just curious.
5. EMD 8 years ago
  
  New scientific hypothesis: Are people ants?
  1. Citizen X 8 years ago
    
    “Ants are so much like human beings as to be an embarrassment. They farm fungi, raise aphids as livestock, launch armies into war, use chemical sprays to alarm and confuse enemies, capture slaves, engage in child labour, exchange information ceaselessly. They do everything but watch television.”
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

Women in Jail Are Being Denied Tampons, Pads, and Basic Human Dignity
For women incarcerated in America’s prison industrial complex, practicing proper menstrual hygiene is almost impossible. That’s because, criminal justice advocates say, inmates are supplied with an inadequate amount of pads or denied feminine hygiene products altogether.

But New York City Councilwoman Julissa Ferreras-Copeland hopes to change that. After months of planning, Ferreras-Copeland formally introduced her long-awaited package of bills on Tuesday that would make menstrual products free and accessible in correctional facilities, as well as in public schools and homeless shelters. The legislation, also sponsored by Council Speaker Melissa Mark-Viverito and Councilman Ydanis Rodriguez, is the latest action in a concerted effort to attain menstrual equity for women denied access to what advocates consider a necessary health item comparable to toilet paper.
1. straffinrun 8 years ago
  
  I hope that long-awaited package of bills includes the ACA. I’m sure all that paper could sop up a little blood.
  1. Akira 8 years ago
    
    Are you talking about the Affordable Care Act, or the American Correctional Association? Both of them generate tons of unnecessary paperwork.
2. Azathoth!! 8 years ago
  
  But people who don’t commit crimes have to PAY for toilet paper and feminine hygiene products.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

French weigh ‘right’ to disconnect from work emails at home
Recent technology has dealt a tremendous blow to the French laissez-faire way of life that emphasizes enjoying time off.

But a controversial new bill could give workers the “right to disconnect” during off hours and vacations. The measure is one of a series of changes introduced by President Fran?ois Hollande’s government to change France’s over-regulated labor market.

Other measures, allowing overtime on top of France’s 35-hour workweek and granting employers more power to hire and fire, have spurred hundreds of thousands of protesters into the streets in recent weeks. Protesters say the government is caving to business interests in hopes of reducing France’s 10% unemployment rate.
If I’m on vacation I just turn incoming work email off – they can call me if something really needs my attention.
1. Old Mexican Mighty Aggressor 8 years ago
  
  Protesters say the government is caving to business interests in hopes of reducing France’s 10% unemployment rate.
  
  Being permanently unemployed is the new French character.
2. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 8 years ago
  
  Protesters say the government is caving to business interests in hopes of reducing France’s 10% unemployment rate.
  This made me LOL so hard. The illogic of it. The sheer retardedness.
Lord Humungus 8 years ago

something something anal
Great Barrier Reef in grip of worst bleaching event
The most pristine parts of the Great Barrier Reef are in the grip of the worst coral bleaching event in history, scientists say.

Experts who’ve surveyed 500 sites between Cairns and Papua New Guinea say once-healthy reefs are now snow-white, with the vast majority ranked in the most severe category of bleaching.

“Even more concerning, we haven’t yet found the southern limit of the bleaching,” says Professor Terry Hughes, the convenor of the National Coral Bleaching Taskforce.
1. Libertarian 8 years ago
  
  “Even more concerning, we haven’t yet found the southern limit of the bleaching,” says Professor Terry Hughes…
  Someone here yesterday was wondering about Hillary’s carpet and drapes matching. I guess this is the answer, for now.
2. lafe.long 8 years ago
  
  something something anal
  
  Great Barrier Reef in grip of worst bleaching event
  I prefer the term “Changing my ringtone”
3. Old Mexican Mighty Aggressor 8 years ago
  
  Experts who’ve surveyed 500 sites between Cairns and Papua New Guinea say once-healthy reefs are now snow-white, with the vast majority ranked in the most severe category of bleaching.
  
  “Someone should be fired for this! I want some butts, and I want them now!”
4. Lee G 8 years ago
  
  It’s just more white privilege
5. Brett L 8 years ago
  
  What’s so great about the Barrier Reef?
  1. Catatafish & Woodchips 8 years ago
    
    It keeps all those shiftless brownfish from invading Australia and terking all der jerbs.
  2. BigT 8 years ago
    
    What’ so fine about art?
  3. Unreconstructed (Sans Flag) 8 years ago
    
    What’s so fine about art?
    1. Unreconstructed (Sans Flag) 8 years ago
      
      Aaaand, not refreshing FTL.
Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 8 years ago

Show of hands – how many of your uber-liberal gun grabber friends have even mentioned the dude bringing a gun to Capitol Hill & getting shot by the cops?
Nary a peep from my rabble. Doesn’t fit narrative. Must not mention.
Sevo 8 years ago

We’re gonna spend that money we don’t have whether you like it of not! Euro stupidity on parade!
“Portugal’s government vows to end austerity, increase spending”
[…]
“…Europe has taken the wrong road, austerity alone is not enough,” Premier Matteo Renzi wrote in an open letter last month…”
http://www.jsonline.com/busine…..77301.html
Right, we need a balance between stupidity and responsibility; if there’s no room for stupidity, where would the leties fit in?
simplybe 8 years ago

I am so ready for a 3rd party. My vote is for a Social conservative Constitutional party. The platform would return the Federal Government back to the original duties assigned to them along with the original Amendments with one exception and that barring slavery. The Constitution already gIves blacks, gays,women and other minority groups equal rights. It was and always has been people subverting the Constitution for their special interest or prejudices that has always been the problem. Only thing I would change of the original Constitution is an amendment like the original 13th Amendment that deals with political corruption with very server penalties
1. Drake 8 years ago
  
  http://www.constitutionparty.com/
  Already exists.
Ken Shultz 8 years ago

“How bad are Trump’s image ratings? The HuffPost Pollster average of recent national polls puts Trump’s favorability at only 31 percent, while 63 percent view him unfavorably.
That’s a notable decline from late January, on the eve of the first votes in the GOP nominating process, when Trump’s average favorability rating was 37 percent, with 57 percent viewing him unfavorably.”
What’s the margin of error?
I look at those stats, and I see that nothing much has changed. 57% to 61%!!!
Color me unimpressed.
1. Ken Shultz 8 years ago
  
  This time with the link:
  http://www.politico.com/story/…..tch-221320
2. Ken Shultz 8 years ago
  
  Incidentally, Hillary’s unfavorable rating stood at at 53% as of March 12.
  http://www.gallup.com/poll/161…..-news.aspx
Je suis Woodchipper 8 years ago

that CBO estimate was pretty close.
Ken Shultz 8 years ago

“Now that 2016 is here, the CBO says that just 177 million people, on average, will have private health insurance in any given month of this year?a shortfall of 24 million people.”
I went to acute care yesterday with the worst sore throat ever. I used to be seen in this place in about 15 minutes. Now its overrun seems mostly with people on Medicaid. It took me two hours to get registered, another hour before they took me back and had the nurse see me, and then another hour before the doctor saw me. After waiting four hours, the doctor spent almost three minutes with me–and shouldn’t I be grateful for that? She looked down my throat, said she couldn’t see anything, and prescribed some antibiotics. This is what passes for “healthcare” these days. I could have gotten the same thing in Mexico by going to a pharmacy and buying antibiotics without a prescription.
1. John 8 years ago
  
  Ken,
  Its almost like putting millions of people into the system and doing nothing to increase the supply of health care ruined the quality of healthcare for the people who had it. Who could have seen that coming?
  1. Ken Shultz 8 years ago
    
    I don’t know, but let’s pretend things are better than they were and just denounce the middle class for their racism.
Ken Shultz 8 years ago

In the waiting room, I had a libertarian moment. I’d been sitting there for almost two hours when I got up to stand because my back started to hurt. I was just standing there quietly.
One of the clerks stands up and says, “You need to go sit down”.
I said, “No thanks, I want to stretch my legs”. ”
You need to go sit down”, he replied.
“Jesus Christ, are you telling me I’m not allowed to stand”, I said. “Is there a law against standing in the waiting room?”
It was at that point that a sheriff popped from around the corner. He looks at me and says, “Disorderly conduct is a . . .”
I looked straight back at him and said, “I dare you. I dare to you to arrest me in front of 50 witnesses for standing in a waiting room”.
I didn’t mention that I have arthritis in my back–why should I have to justify myself to anybody for standing in awaiting room? If he’d arrested me, I’d have made out like a bandit. Ultimately they decided that hassling a sick patient for standing instead of sitting wasn’t worth the trouble. But I hate to think of [people getting pushed around like that.
I used to tell people that nationalized healthcare would make it going to the DMV. It’s actually much worse than that.
1. EMD 8 years ago
  
  Seriously? This happened? That’s ridiculous.
  1. Ken Shultz 8 years ago
    
    I think the clerk was trying to play the big man in front of his sheriff buddy. I guess the sheriff felt compelled to back him up.
    Note, they didn’t actually do anything. They were just trying to intimidate me for the fuck of it.
2. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 8 years ago
  
  I used to tell people that nationalized healthcare would make it going to the DMV
  This is the cognitive dissonance that bugs me the most. So many people want so much more government in so many more aspects of our lives, but really – who has ever had a great government-related experience? Who has ever come out of a government building saying “wow – they really know how to treat their customers! 5 stars!”
  The solution to shitty bureaucracy is not more bureaucracy!
  1. kbolino 8 years ago
    
    And should you ever find the DMV experience tolerable, try the Social Security office. The DMV is at least somewhat selective, if only because not everyone can or does drive.
    1. Drake 8 years ago
      
      I’ve had relatively pleasant DMV experiences (I believe there was some outsourcing going on).
      Try a VA center. That’s loke horror movie bad shit. People literally waiting to die with staff who are specially selected for their complete lack of empathy and motivation.
  2. BigT 8 years ago
    
    who has ever had a great government-related experience? Who has ever come out of a government building saying “wow – they really know how to treat their customers! 5 stars!
    
    Witnesses at the Nuremberg hangings?
3. Rhywun 8 years ago
  
  “Dr. Goebbels will see you now.”
  Seriously, I would find another doctor if that is their environment.
  1. Ken Shultz 8 years ago
    
    It was urgent care. It’s where you’re supposed to go in a pinch if you don’t have an appointment–for fast service.
    I’ll never go there again. Before ObamaCare, it was completely different.
    1. kbolino 8 years ago
      
      The wasteland that “urgent care” has become is entirely attributable to HMO and ACA. This is what “universal health care” looks like: shitty.
      Like every other “universal health care” system, you will have a “right” to wait inordinate amounts of time to be told useless and/or incorrect things by a lab-coat wearing idiot. Misdiagnosis and malpractice will become the norm, especially after they are inevitably removed as torts like every other “universal health care” system has done.
      1. Brett L 8 years ago
        
        Honestly, I’ve had the opposite experience. We have a night-time pediatric urgent care around the corner from the house that I would much rather visit than the pediatrician when my kid is sick. I took the baby there when he was less than 2 months old and they refused to charge me because their rules required them to advise me to take him to the hospital. (He was running a fever, he’d already been to the hospital, where they fucked up the spinal tap and held him overnight to make sure it wasn’t dangerous — the pediatricians office fucked up 3 urine samples before we took him BACK to the hospital and they immediately diagnosed him with a UTI)
        I’ve been back twice and they’ve been better than the pediatrician, who isn’t bad.
      2. Drake 8 years ago
        
        HMO? They still exist? I would kill to have my 2008 HMO plan back.
4. R C Dean 8 years ago
  
  Well played, Ken.
R C Dean 8 years ago

“Now that 2016 is here, the CBO says that just 177 million people, on average, will have private health insurance in any given month of this year?a shortfall of 24 million people.”
Since 2010 the population has increased from about 309mm to around 321mm – an increase of 12mm people.
Medicaid enrollment since 2010 has gone from 54mm to 68mm, an increase of 14mm
Medicare enrollment has gone from 44mm in 2011 to 55mm, an increase of 11mm.
In rough numbers, we have @ 21mm uninsured/unwelfared people in the country now, and that’s overlooking that CBO is counting people who were covered for only one month. The real number is probably a couple million higher.
Throw this in:
In other words, it would appear that a net 9 million people have lost their private health plans, thanks to Obamacare?with a net 5 million people having lost employer-based plans and a net 4 million people having lost individually purchased plans.
And this thing is a comprehensive, colossal failure.
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