Sex

Transgender Activist Tells Gay Students Their Kinky Tumblr Posts Are 'Triggering'

Trans activist demands safe space from other people's blog images.

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BDSM

Should adults stop posting naughty pictures of themselves—on their own blogs—because the images are considered "triggering" by an unhinged transgender activist?

Of course not, says sex columnist Dan Savage, in response to an insane letter from a gay man whose consensual BDSM relationship with another student is traumatizing a completely unrelated third party. Said third party, the trans activist, has threatened reprisals against the couple unless they stop posting pictures of their kink sessions on Tumblr.

According to the letter—which, to be clear, is anonymous and unverifiable—the trans activist has nothing to do with the couple: "ze" is simply triggered by the mental image of them dominating each other. Read for yourself:

I'm a gay male college student in a healthy [dominant/submissive] relationship with a bisexual guy. My boyfriend posts pictures of our kink sessions to his Tumblr. (No faces.) A trans woman active in campus queer politics confronted me today. Ze had seen my boyfriend's Tumblr (!) and recognized me (!!!). Ze demanded I stop engaging in BDSM because ze has to see me on campus and knowing my boyfriend "controls and abuses" me is triggering for zir. Ze said images of me in medical restraints were particularly traumatizing. Ze was shaking and crying, and I wound up comforting zir. I stupidly let zir think I would stop. Now what?
Scenario Utterly Bananas

P.S. Ze also threatened to out my boyfriend if ze saw new pictures go up on his Tumblr. My boyfriend is already out—about being bi and being kinky—so he laughed it off. But how fucked up is that?

Indeed, that's quite messed up. Here was Savage's advice:

You tell this woman you take orders from your boyfriend, SUB, not from random campus nutcases. You advise zir to stay away from Tumblr porn ze finds traumatizing. And if ze pushes back, you explain to zir that if anyone's being controlling and abusive here, it's zir. And if ze starts shaking and crying, SUB, direct zir to the student health center.

And for your own protection, SUB, tell zir all of this with at least one witness present. Document everything, and if ze keeps getting in your face about your consensual, nonabusive D/s relationship, take the ironic step of filing a restraining order against zir.

It would seem that conservatives no longer have a monopoly on harassing gay people and trying to police what's happening inside their bedrooms. The authoritarianism of perpetual offendedness—which often masquerades as mental health concerns, at least on campuses—allows left-leaning students to place both formal and informal checks on totally harmless kinds of expression they have nevertheless deemed unsafe.

The situation described in the above letter, however, represents something of a new low. Are students now actually claiming the right to restrict private behavior that has absolutely nothing to do with them? If so, true progressives on campus must push back as firmly as possible (even though that probably counts as assault nowadays). Tolerance means letting people do what they want with their own bodies—something a trans person ought to understand—not imposing one's fragile emotions on as many victims as possible.

Sorry if that's triggering.

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    1. It’s a place where every day is pancake day.

      1. You’ve said so much with so very little.

        *standing ovation*

      2. But while I was waiting for an answer:

        Tumblr lets you effortlessly share anything.
        Post text, photos, quotes, links, music, and videos from your browser, phone, desktop, email or wherever you happen to be. You can customize everything, from colors to your theme’s HTML.

        So it’s MySpace, but with a twist?

          1. I do remember several months ago seeing a youtube video with two people who didn’t have a FUCKING consonant between them, and the guy(?) said “Oh my gawd, that was sooo Tumblr”. I closed the browser after that.

            1. I mean “oh my gawww, tha wasooo Tumblurrr”

              1. It is a place for porn and such.

                1. So a confused man is offended by yucky stuff on a site for homegrown porn?

                  1. So a confused man is offended by things other confused men do?

                    No wonder they’re confused.

                    1. Q: What’s the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator?

                      A: The fridge doesn’t fart when you pull pull your meat out.

                    2. I wish I could live in your world.

      3. I had all kinds of snarky shit to say, but goddamn JW, how can I top that?

      1. Wait, that’s right, your name link is an ill-updated tumblr page.

        1. I like to think of it as a thought experiment in the howling existential void.

          1. Just WHAT is your existential void howling for, anyway?!??! The moon?!??!

            Mine is howling for Libertarian Utopia, but will settle for smoked salmon and Yagermeister…

      2. WTF AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS BURNING YELLOW AFTERIMAGE?

        1. Fap?

          1. I did that already.

            1. Well, I’m out of ideas then.

      3. Wow – the short bus stops at Denny’s. . . who’d’a ever thunk it?

    2. Welcome To Tumblr: The Video

      Trigger Warning: It is awesome

      1. Why don’t other sites have this kind of helpful information as to how they work?

  1. “I’m a gay male college student in a healthy [dominant/submissive] relationship with a bisexual guy. My boyfriend posts pictures of our kink sessions to his Tumblr. (No faces.) A trans woman active in campus queer politics confronted me today. Ze had seen my boyfriend’s Tumblr (!) and recognized me (!!!). Ze demanded I stop engaging in BDSM because ze has to see me on campus and knowing my boyfriend “controls and abuses” me is triggering for zir. Ze said images of me in medical restraints were particularly traumatizing. Ze was shaking and crying, and I wound up comforting zir. I stupidly let zir think I would stop. Now what?”

    Dan Savage should learn to spot fake letters.

    1. Mentions Tumblr
    2. Trans activist somehow finds their Tumblr and knows it’s them (what, do they have pictures on there that contain school paraphernalia? How would she even know the person with this Tumblr went there, much less recognize them?)
    3. Uses insane, made-up pronouns rather than going by “she” like 98% of actual trans women
    4. Alleged gay man posting nude pics to Tumblr also uses the insane made up pronouns in a letter to a famous sex columnist

    My bullshit alarm is ringing.

    1. Though Savage claims all of his letters are real, I’m in the belief that all of his letters are phony.

      1. The letters are real. Their content may be made up.

        1. How can the letters be real of our eyes aren’t real?

          1. The letters abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz are actual real letters.

            The various combinations of the above are complete bullshit.

    2. Dear Abby? Am I in the right place?!?!?

      Dear Abby, Dear Abby,
      My life is a mess,
      Bill Clinton stained my dress,
      I can’t get it off my hairy chest,
      ‘Cause my boyfriend’s a pest,
      I can’t talk of my sexual past,
      ‘Cause he gets all aghast!

      And Abby, my boyfriend and I have been “seeing” each other for 41 years!
      Now our home state will let us get gay-married, we’re a itchin’ to go get us a hitchin’!
      But boyfriend INSISTS on us getting gay-married in churches that don’t want us, by preachers that hate us, and get photoed by people that can’t stand us, and on and on and on!
      I think it’s ’cause his pet Hamster Huey and his Gooey Kabloooey rejected him in the 5th grade, and he’s NEVER gotten over it!
      Abbey, PLEASE don’t tell us to get therapy, we can’t afford it! We COULD afford it, but he gives all of our money to politicians who say they are a gonna fix all of this mess with more laws!
      So Abby? Besides therapy, what can I do to help my boyfriend settle for getting gay-married by people who like gays?

      Love and Smooches, Dude B. Gay

      1. Abby? Abby? ABBY!!! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!?!

        Abby, I REALLY-REALLY need yer help NOW!

        My pet binturong died, and I didn’t want to trouble my boyfriend about it, so I buried it in some rags in the attic, and let it mummify, hoping that my boyfriend would never notice (he never paid much of any attention at all, to my pet Benny the Binturong, so, the idea of him never noticing Benny being gone, isn’t so strange, really). But then my boyfriend… Call him “Ted Cruz” for annoying-mouse purposes here… Ted found the mummy of my beloved Benny. Now he thinks it is his old friend Hamster Huey, come back to him after all these years, and to make up to him! So now he is making love to my dear departed pet binturong all day, every day, and totally ignoring me!

        HELP, Dear Abby, HELP!!!!

        1. If the sequel includes Commander Coriander Salamander, you should get a medal.

  2. What are you asking questions for, here? Go ask Twitter’s Trust and Safety council. They must know the correct answers.

  3. So the activists have run out of things to activate over?

    1. I’m with Irish above, I think this might be a Hit & Run commenter trolling.

  4. [raises hand]

    Can we please stop publicizing every story where some gibbering alt-lunatic with no sense of self has a yucky! attack and demands [stomps feet] that someone do something about it[!]?

    Seriously. I can’t take these fucking drooling moonbat stories any more. Let them exist in blissful anonymity. Write about meaningful events and things.

    1. When the moon bats stop having power then the stories will no longer be meaningful.

      1. It’s a letter to Dan Savage. That’s kinda the opposite of power.

  5. Robby, how dare you abuse your privilege to further trigger zir. Ze is clearly triggered by any and all wrongthink.

    1. Dr Ze’s arch Nemesis is none other than Mr. Zir and the gang of questionables.

  6. Ok, there’s only one solution. We have to make a law. And any of these awful gays who post an image than offends ‘soimeone’, must be arrested and labeled a sex offender for life and have their passports stamped with ‘pervert’. Obama approves.

    1. All the anti sex theocrats ever had to do was claim to be triggered by sexual displays like any female skin.

      Meet the new world same as the barbaric world.

      1. it is irritating how excellent we are at repeating mistakes. I would like to think that we’re still evolving, but that takes a while

  7. I was going to express some skepticism about this story, but Irish beat me to it.

    I mean, it could have happened, but it doesn’t have the indicia of reliability you want to see in an Internet post.

    1. Yeah, I’m beginning to think that the days of referring to a random post on the internet with unverified authenticity and unknown origin are coming to a middle.

      At least when Kim Kardashian post a pic of her ass, I know it’s Kim Kardashian.

      1. Breaking news. 50 year old Kim Kardashian admits to hiring an ass double.

    2. And there *was* an actual occurrence of someone who was even crazier than Savage on the subject of sexuality and gender, confronting him at some university.

      So there’s always the possibility this letter was a fake story inspired by this real-world incident.

      1. “So there’s always the possibility this letter was a fake story inspired by this real-world incident.”

        A real world incident that was probably something nobody would have ever done if they hadn’t read a fake story about it on the internet in the first place.

  8. “Transgender Activist Tells Gay Students Their Kinky Tumblr Posts Are ‘Triggering'”

    Taking my family to live in the Alaskan wilderness sounds more and more sensible.

    1. FYI: Tasmania is quite beautiful and no bears.

      1. I don’t know how much of it was ribbing, but when I was in Australia I was warned about literally every animal. Maybe Tasmania is different.

        1. Tasmania has “Devils” that harbor some sort of cancer forming virus.

          1. Because they are so inbred they may as well be clones.

        2. I seen Australian government page that listed spiders one might encounter in any given area. It listed those spiders which weren’t dangerously venomous to humans. You’ll see that similar sites for other places in the world, where it’s generally easier to list the dangerous ones.

      2. “…no bears.”

        Pussy.

  9. Tumblr is essentially a porno site with a semi-respectable side. Ze should find another site to got to because, without various porn, Tumblr doesn’t exist.

    1. You just don’t get it Grinch! It’s cool to post pr0n, as long as it’s the pr0n I like!

    2. Tumblr is the SJW’s website of choice?

    1. 1) Nice CZ-75.
      2) I was expecting a horse.

      1. That could be a CZ-97B!

      2. Horse porn.Hmmm. I’m sure that must be a thing.

        Excuse me…

        1. She’s classy, that one.

          (I meant Susan, E.D.Void)

  10. It would seem that conservatives no longer have a monopoly on harassing gay people and trying to police what’s happening inside their bedrooms

    Worse than that, Robby. The progs and cons are going to form an evil alliance and go on a witch hunt rampage to end all witch hunt rampages. Remember that prohibition thing, when they did that? This time they’re going to make it real.

    1. Just wait until the Muslim vote becomes important to the Prog coalition. The gays will suddenly pine for the days when their biggest problem was the viscous conservatives not wanting to bake their wedding cakes.

      Anyone who things the Progs won’t turn on the gays once doing so suits their purposes is kidding themselves.

      1. How does one measure the viscosity of a conservative?

        Wait, please, forget I asked.

        1. You measure it by how gay affirming they are.

        2. In a Gaybolt Viscometer.

      2. Until gay rights came along the Commies were very homophobic and regarded homosexuality as an upper-class depravity (see or read Spartacus anyone?) and loved to accuse their enemies of being homosexuals. I don’t see why that attitude can’t make a comeback.

        1. To be fair, until gay rights came along, everyone was like that (minus the class warfare part).

          1. The communists made an art of it. And so did the progs. Bill Moyers made his bones working for the Johnson campaign blackmailing gay members of the Goldwater campaign.

            1. Yes, I suppose they were particularly nasty about it.

              But I think it is unlikely to return as a political tactic. The broad societal acceptance of gays is a real change that means it just wouldn’t fly anymore. Maybe if Muslims became a powerful political force. But I don’t think that is at all likely in the US either.

              1. It won’t be a political tactic. What will happen is what is happening in Europe. Gays will be told that living openly in public is disrespectful to religious Muslims and that any gay who doesn’t go back in the closet is a racist. And any poor gay who happens to get bashed by Muslims will be said to have been asking for it.

        2. Tony Curtis bathing Laurence Olivier? How could I forget?

        3. In Iran it was the Commies who introduced anti-gay attitudes. Persian Islam was fine with some man on man (and man on boy) action, then the Marxist press denounced it as a bourgeois indulgence and that was that. Hell 50s feminists railed against lesbians (the lavender menace).

      3. Anyone who things the Progs won’t turn on the gays [insert name of victim group being thrown under the bus here] once doing so suits their purposes is kidding themselves.

        FTFY. They’ll throw anyone under the bus if it means power for them. Hell, a lot of people have pointed out that Trump is actually picking up a lot of the disaffected white male blue collar types that used to be part of the Prog coalition, until they were pushed aside for blacks, brown, womyn, and LGBT identity groups.

        1. Yeah. There is nothing special about gays. Eventually everyone gets the knock at the door.

          1. +1 servant’s entrance.

      4. See Europe and anti gay Muslim violence for details.

        The Jews have largely already gotten out. Gays will be next.

        And women will be covering up, hiding in their homes, and only going out with male escort. Cologne will be the new normal.

        Islamists make much better tools for societal disruption than gays. If you import an incompatible alien culture, you don’t even need to divide to conquer. Much easier to import division and conquer.

  11. I’m gonna have to cede this cat spat to the experts and let Miss Tony field this one.

  12. Tumblr activists are basically un-serious people, and we shouldn’t treat them as serious people rather than a sideshow.

  13. Everyone post their favorite tumblr pages for Paul.

    Mine is Indifferent cats in amateur porn. For those of you who are not very smart, that site is NSFW.

    1. I don’t even have to look at that page to know it is awesome. I mean the internet is ruled by cats and porn. Any page that combines both is by definition epic.

    2. I’m definitely checking that one out when I get home.

      1. I’m definitely going to try and forget I ever heard about it.

    3. Does it involve cute chicks with cat-ear headbands? If not, I don’t think I want to look…

    4. I left the cat on the bed once and he pissed on my leg while I was busy.

  14. Are students now actually claiming the right to restrict private behavior that has absolutely nothing to do with them?

    I mean, everyone else is, so why shouldn’t they?

    1. There’s no “now” about it. Nearly any of the campus crusades of the last, who knows how long, have been exactly that.

      Climate change, for example. I would say that it is a giant crusade to restrict private behavior, etc.

      The core of the SJW/safe space delusion is that things that have absolutely no impact on you are somehow critical to your self and well-being.

      1. It is not a delusion. It is a way to gain power, to be able to say “this affects me, so I get to have a say about it, even to the point of demanding it be stopped”. You want to infantilize them, but you shouldn’t. At least some of these people are specifically doing this shit to push the edges of when you can butt in and interfere with other people’s business, with the express purpose of being able to control other people and have power and influence over other people’s actions.

        I’m sure some of the dolts who engage in this are just fucking morons who start believing it. But some of them are doing this specifically to gain power.

        1. It is totally about power. What people seem to have forgotten is that things like Communism and Fascism were as much as anything driven by a sense of victimhood. The Nazis and Communists both saw themselves as victims exacting just revenge on people who had wronged them.

          This entire cult of the victim that has arose on college campuses is for the purpose of giving people a rationalization for oppressing and if it goes far enough attacking and killing their political enemies. You can’t be a victim unless there is a perpetrator who made you that way. And all being a victim does in this context is give people a way to rationalize taking revenge on those designated as perpetrators.

          1. Zo you are zaying zhat zhese zocial juztize warriorz juzt zee zhe need for a zafe zpace?

          2. most definitely! tyranny comes dressed in good intentions. seems like it’s kind of a tired trick to me, but it still works on almost everybody.

        2. This X 1,000,000. This right here is the main reason why I despise these useless cunts so very much.

        3. Power is not a means, it is the end.

          All progressive causes are simply rationalizations for more progressive power.

  15. It’s World War Zir up in that peez.

  16. I am convinced that at least half of the people who claim to be “transgendered” are just neurotic attention seeking pains in the asses who have no actual gender issues at all. Actual transgendered people are pretty rare. Yet, suddenly you can’t throw a cat without hitting a “transgendered activist”.

    1. The activists also have an interest in making enough noise that it seems like a more common thing than it is.

      I expect that there are the attention seekers you mention. But I would think that more common are people who are genuinely screwed up in some way and feel uncomfortable in their own skin, which is always a common thing for teenagers. Transgender is getting so much attention now that it makes sense that some would latch onto that as the cause of their discomfort and alienation.

      1. I agree. And when you realize how available surgery and hormone replacement is and how much of a permanent change that is, it is really disturbing to think that confused teenagers are now being encouraged to think they are transgendered.

        The entire think is sick and deeply damaging.

        1. Yeah. I’m pretty accepting of the whole transgender thing. But for god’s sake, wait until you’ve gone through puberty to do something drastic to your body like that.

          1. We are telling every kid who doesn’t fit some idealized version of masculinity or femininity that instead of just being different and to be proud of that, that they really are some kind of defective person who requires massive body changing surgery to be happy. That is pretty fucking sick when you think about it.

          2. All guidelines for transgender health care say no irreversible treatments before age of majority/medical consent. A surgeon who operated on a pre-pubescent patient would be committing malpractice.

            Minors getting “sex change operations” simply isn’t happening. We’re supposed to be resisting moral panics, not creating ones of our own.

            1. Maybe someday they will similarly aged restrict circumcision.

            2. Well, that’s good to know.

            3. There’s the doctor in Toronto, supposedly a leading scholar in this field for decades, who was fired because of his “wait and see” approach to pre-pubescent. It might not have been surgery, but he didn’t want to to do a social conversion until all were very sure it was real. That was not good enough for the activists. Every 6 year old is to be believed.

    2. at least half of the people who claim to be “transgendered” are just neurotic attention seeking pains in the asses who have no actual gender issues at all

      “If you ain’t cut, you ain’t shit.”

    3. How many cats have you thrown? Whats the sample size? The population size? If you only threw one or two cats, as would be normal, and managed to hit a tranny each time, it may just be a coincidence.

      1. I have to admit I haven’t been as systematic in my cat throwing as I probably should have been. I have, however, thrown my fair share of cats over the last few years and found that they invariably hit a transgendered activist.

        1. Hopefully we can find some tax funded scientists to see what role global warming has played in this tranny bloom. I hear some Australian researchers are looking for work.

        2. Good lord, I’ve heard of this! I didn’t think that you would engage in something like that though, John.

        3. See – bad record keeping, poor methodology (how do you know those trannies weren’t self-selecting?).

          Your results are worthless.

          NIH will be renewing your research grant shortly.

    4. So, pretty much like any teenage girl?

  17. “Ze Zir Zis”, uplifting that the Zika virus causes speech impairments.

    1. I thought Zir was like “sir” what with all the BDSM talk so my head got all spinny and then I vomited on my lap.

      1. Maybe you should see a zoctor*.

        *standard form has connotations of hierarchy

    2. It’s a clear malt beverage.

  18. If so, true progressives on campus must push back as firmly as possible

    I wonder what you mean by true progressive. The kind that wants to put straight people into camps? Help me out here.

  19. So the “Ze” thing is a joke, right? I know some people have seriously proposed gender neutral pronouns. But no one seriously uses them, do they?

    It makes no sense in the case of transgender people who want to live as the other gender.

    1. I don’t know Zeb, you tell me.

      1. Maybe that’s why it annoys me. “Z” is my letter!

    2. But no one seriously uses them, do they?

      From the post:

      I’m a gay male college student

      So, probably yes.

    3. “But no one seriously uses them, do they”

      At least one does.

    4. I would assume you use them if you want Dan Savage to answer your letter.

      Other than that, I don’t know. There is no-one stupider than a smart person without a moral center.

    5. A friend of mine who works on a college campus knows someone who demands to be called ze.

  20. I would hope the dom in the relationship wouldn’t have put up with this nonsense from an estronomite.

  21. Sorry if that’s triggering.

    Don’t apologize to these triggered assholes. Ever.

  22. Remember this homophobic innuendo directed at Joe McCarthy’s right-hand man Roy Cohn (and possibly at Cohn’s buddy Dave Schine)?

    Mr. Welch: “Did you think [photograph] this came from a Pixie?
    Senator McCarthy. Will counsel for my benefit define ? I think he might be an expert on that ? what a pixie is?
    Mr. Welch. Yes. I should say, Mr. Senator, that a pixie is a close relative of a fairy. (Laughter from the chamber) Shall I proceed, sir? Have I enlightened you?
    Senator McCarthy. As I said, I think you may be an authority on what a pixie is.

    Good times. Good times.

    1. This was supposed to be in response to the comment up above about how homophobic the progs used to be.
      Though Welch was himself just a liberal (i.e., he was on the left of center but still had some inclination to value the concept of personal freedom) rather than a progressive (who only values personal freedom tot he extent that it’s exercised in the correct manner).

    2. Wow was Cohn a fucked up guy.

  23. If so, true progressives on campus must push back as firmly as possible

    Oh, Mr. Soave. How naughty.

    1. Why on earth would progressives suddenly do a 180 and push back on someone trying to limit other people’s speech because someone, somewhere, said it might be triggering?

      That’s pretty much their shtick these days, isn’t it? Not to mention, pushing back on a transgendered person would be totally “punching down”, right?

    2. power bottom

  24. I can’t keep the pronouns straight! ARGHHH!!! This is confusing and troubling to me!

    I’m so triggered I’m going to go back to what my employer is paying me to do!

    1. Now, now, let’s not go crazy here.

  25. It’s like a choose your own adventure book…only you can’t go back 22 pages and recover your parts if you regret your decision.

  26. Was “Go fuck yourself” not an option?

    1. “Go cut off your dick and go fuck yourself with it” is a real possibility in this case.

  27. Where’s the judgment in the headline, Robby? THAT’S NOT OK

  28. Oh, ze, zir
    shut the fuck up

  29. So I guess I’m some sort of retrograde troglodyte in need of chastisement as a SJW, because I didn’t know that “ze” and “zir” were tran-speak for He/She and Him’/Her.

  30. Zatz nutz.

  31. I’ma go out on a limb here and say that this didn’t actually happen.

  32. “True progressives…” Did someone at Reason actually write the words “true progressives,” suggesting something other than monstrous destructiveness?

    You do understand that “progressives” is a self-chosen euphemism for communists, right? Totalitarian liberty-hating communists. The fact that they are all up into LGBT s#it these days just means they have a nouveau totalitarianism. It’s a new totalitarianism every stinking day now.

  33. Dear Scenario Utterly Bananas,
    Ze likes your boyfriend and wants to guilt you into breaking up with your boyfriend by using the latest catchphrases so ze can try to get him in bed with zir.

  34. This is an example of why I don’t support taxpayer money being used to suicide proof bridges.

  35. ze is short for “zero”.

  36. I was aware they existed, but this is the first time I’ve ever seen transgender pronouns used multiple times in a fully fleshed out paragraph.

    It was just as stupid-looking as I imagined it.

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  38. “It would seem that conservatives no longer have a monopoly on harassing gay people and trying to police what’s happening inside their bedrooms.”

    Speaking as one who considers himself liberal, (very liberal), it’s been a long time since Liberal meant liberal. As a liberal, I’d like to see very liberal guns laws, as well as liberal laws regarding anything consenting adults do, (which in most cases means no laws). Where today’s Liberals got the idea that Liberal means telling others what size fizzy sugar-water they could purchase, or that they have an inalienable right never to be annoyed or offended, I have no idea. That’s not what liberal means.

  39. Would it be “triggering” if he simply told “ze” to go fuck “zemselves”?

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