Mike Huckabee

Before Huckabee's Campaign Dies in Iowa, You See The Ring

Former Gov. Mike Huckabee makes Adele parody appealing to Iowa caucus voters and the result is pretty scary.

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If you didn't catch former governor of Arkansas, Mike Huckabee's parody of the Adele song "Hello," you aren't the only one. The Iowa caucus pandering ad was pulled from YouTube after Adele or her team asked for it to be taken down.

Thankfully, you can still view the horror below in a mash-up from the scary movie, The Ring:

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  1. Things are actually getting pretty ridiculous where I’m at in Iowa. Candidates, tv ads, radio ads. Guess I’ll go to the bar.

    1. Please take away our first in the nation status. I know it is an economic blessing to some. But it is really annoying.

    2. Please take away our first in the nation status. I know it is an economic blessing to some. But it is really annoying.

      1. But we love corn. Corn food, corn fuel, corn corn corn…

    3. I spent an hour on the phone with Rand’s campaign HQ explaining they had mailed the incorrect caucus location to the neighborhood with highest percentage of supporters (most of whom are students).

      1. ITS A TRAP

        1. There are two types of people in the world: Those that think there’s a trap and those that arrrrrgghhhhhhh help!

    4. I’m from Ohio. I feel your pain.

  2. Huckabee and Christie can do a double-act as the fat clowns of “conservatism” after they get bumped out of the running.

  3. How many cocks do you think he’s had in his mouth? I put the over/under at 5.

    1. Atone time?

      1. *At one

  4. I like mint Kit-Kat.

    As you were.

    1. *Adds Rufus to secretive list*

      1. I hope that’s a safe space.

    2. Apply cream cheese generously.

    3. A coworker of mine returned from Japan with some green tea flavored Kit-Kats. They were pretty good. That prompted me to do some research and it turns out they’ve got all kinds of flavors.

      Here’s a link.

    4. Does it still have chocolate? Because mint without chocolate is just not the same

      1. I remember going to Mount Rushmore with my parents when I was young and getting what I thought was mint chocolate ice cream at the cafe/gift shop, but it was just mint. Worst vacation ever.

        1. And that vacation is the reason you became a racist.

          1. No it’s the reason I became a libertarian…wait, same thing.

            1. It seems like we have a few things in common. I have a wild idea: we should start a group – we could even call it a clan – and we should get together to discuss the things we have in common.

              1. We could call it the No Crustys club.

                1. Does that mean I am out of my own club? This club sucks!

                  1. No Crustys. We already have one.

  5. MLK bridge blockade draws on long history of protest

    “On this year’s Martin Luther King Jr. holiday, a group of demonstrators drove onto the Bay Bridge, stopped near the eastern span tower, and strung chains through each of their cars and around themselves ? shutting down traffic for about 30 minutes before they were arrested….

    “There’s a clear symbolism in blocking a bridge on his birthday, because King helped lead a civil rights action in Selma, Ala., wherein protesters attempting to cross the Edmund Pettus Bridge were beaten horribly by police. But the episode got me thinking about why we’re seeing so many protests on roads and bridges. Why those? Why now?

    “(And no, in case you’re wondering, the bridge shutdown did not get me thinking about how you were inconvenienced trying to drive across the bridge. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: The purpose of protest is to disrupt a status quo that isn’t working. No one risks arrest, injury and public vitriol for kicks.)…

    1. “…maybe the most famous bridge protest was in January 1989, when members of the San Francisco group Stop AIDS Now or Else shut down traffic on the Golden Gate Bridge for more than an hour. It’s amazing to read the stories from that time ? you can substitute the quotes from “angry commuters” in this week’s stories with no dissonance at all….

      “”For every person who yelled an epithet, there was another person who gave us a thumbs-up,” [former protester Kate Raphael] said. “So I don’t think it’s true that all motorists are anti-everything in these situations. There were some people who understood that we were there to ask them to think about something that deeply affected them.”

      “Be one of those people next time.”

      1. Example:

        “In explaining her organization’s strong support for the Fight for $15 campaign, BYP100’s Charlene Carruthers insisted that the movement is “about racial justice AND economic justice.” The Dream Defenders’ Umi Selah (formerly known as Phillip Agnew) has drawn parallels between racist violence and inequality in the United States, and the violence carried out by the U.S. military overseas. In a recent interview, he said he’d like to see the U.S. government “not engage in wars where we perpetuate an economic system that ruins democracy around the world,” and that movements must understand this. Alicia Garza has stated hopefully that “for the first time in a long time, we are talking about alternatives to capitalism.”

        https://www.dissentmagazine.org/ article/class-politics-black-lives-matter

      2. What a group, using an implicit threat as your name.

        I’m looking forward to the development of the flying car. Then we can laugh at these dipshits while we fly over them.

    2. From what I have seen, particularly from the BLM people, it is just another front on the marxist war on America. They wrap themselves in the civil rights movement and then agitate for redistribution and the same rending of society that the feminists, environmentalists, destruction of capitalism, etc are demanding.

      1. Ugh. “…rending of society and destruction of capitalism…”

    3. The SFGate commenters were just merciless on those protestors. It seemed like 99:1 against. And I’m with the majority: fuck protestors who hold random people hostage for any reason. It’s basically kidnapping. I don’t particularly like targeted protests that involve such actions, but if you are blocking a military base to protest a war, at least there’s some connection. But blocking a bridge? I want those people in jail, and sued by everyone who missed a flight or a doctor’s appointment or a job interview.

    1. Dude just can’t catch a break.

    2. Gotta start somewhere.

  6. Anyone post this yet?

    “The chief of the Swedish army, General Anders Br?nnstr?m, told men under his command that they could expect to be fighting a war in Europe against skilled opponents “within a few years.”

    http://en.europenews.dk/Sweden…..29990.html

    1. Time for the Swedes to rediscover their inner-Viking. And maybe they’ll play a little more rough on the ice.

      1. It will be more than the swedes and more than a little rough.

        The EU leadership is officially denying that the NYE mass molestation in Cologne and elsewhere had nothing to do with middle easterners or north africans.

        People. Are. Pissed.

        The Swedish leadership is refusing to explain their position on immigration while the country falls apart.

        The same in Germany. I won’t be one bit surprised if that vapid idiot Merkel doesnt get lynched.

        1. It’s not a surprise, but this is showing how the real racists are in the media and government classes.

        1. Note how they’re loath to admit to violence by immigrants, but if they can blame the “extreme right” they do so immediately and loudly.

          1. The thing I’ve noted about the coverage of that is that I keep seeing the same words and terms being used again and again: ‘Nazis’, ‘far right’, ‘beating up children’.

            I mean, I don’t know what’s going on over there, but I’m naturally suspicious of media because of their shitty track record on spinning things wildly or just plain out fabricating stuff.

        2. He said inner-viking, not inner-nazi.

      2. Swedes aren’t vikings. They’re pussies.

    2. We are a bit overdue for a European style coup. I suspect that the various standing armies over there, and they’d rather read the writing on the wall before they end up on it.

    3. Anybody watch Occupied, a recent Norwegian TV show about a near-future Russian invasion of Norway?

      1. That might be a little scary to watch if you’re Norwegian. The Putin is a tad bit crazy to say the least.

        1. Not really, the Russians are relatively laid back in this one because they got good catering.

    4. Oh cripes a link that links to Breitbart?

      Here’s a remotely credible source-link: http://www.ibtimes.com/world-w…..re-2284089

      It’s rather amusing to watch the usual suspects try and link this to immigrants when the guy is pretty obviously referring to Russia.

  7. Speaking of Lincoln getting pulled from his pedestal

    Hillary tried to say something uncontroversial about Abraham Lincoln being her favorite President* – what could be more anodyne that that?

    But she didn’t know when to shut up.

    “Lincoln, she said “was willing to reconcile and forgive,” and she speculated that had he not been assassinated American history might have featured “a little less rancor” and been “a little more forgiving and tolerant that might possibly have brought people back together more quickly.” But instead “we had Reconstruction, we had the reigns of segregation and Jim Crow. We had people in the South feeling totally discouraged and defiant.”…

    “…She is going to have to make a new statement that clarifies her views on this subject, as even very Clinton-friendly pundits are absolutely not going to have her back….

    “She experienced a kind of space-time slippage and delivered an answer appropriate to a completely different time and place; she is going to have to align herself with present-day reality. But unlike on questions ranging from the Iraq War to the Trans-Pacific Partnership, there’s no cost for her in changing her view on Reconstruction, and it’s all but inevitable that it will happen.”

    *Mr. Clinton didn’t cut it, apparently.

    1. “She experienced a kind of space-time slippage and delivered an answer appropriate to a completely different time and place; she is going to have to align herself with present-day reality.”

      Present day reality being…?

  8. British Jews may be forced to rethink their future in the UK in the face of increasing criticism of religious practices including circumcision, religious schools and ritual slaughter, according to a prominent figure at the London-based Beth Din religious court.

    “David Frei, a British-born barrister and registrar at the Beth Din since 1999, has warned of a growing trend of anti-religious sentiment in Britain that has followed record levels of atheism and Islamist terrorist atrocities in Europe that have turned people against faith ? be it Judaism, Islam or Christianity ? as a whole.

    “He fears the British government will look to crack down on religious freedom in the UK in response to public opinion. He also believes the Jewish Orthodox community will resist any attempt to legislate against customs such as kosher meat, Jewish yeshivas or the practise of circumcision…”

    (Autoplay video on upper right of the screen)

    1. Things are shaping for the Jews to be blamed again.

  9. (as you can see, I missed Troll Appreciation Saturday, so I’m trying to catch up)

  10. Kylie Jenner Thinks Blac Chyna’s As Bad For Rob Kardashian As Deep Dish Pizza

    “”Kylie thinks Blac isn’t good for Rob’s diet,” the insider told HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY. “She’s worse than an deep dish thick crust pizza with extra cheese. She’s just bad for Rob and Kylie’s determined to educate her brother on how she can singlehandedly destroy his life like she tried to do with Tyga. Kylie’s heated. She’s really bothered by this ordeal.””

    (risk of autoplay)

    1. Who are those people and what the hell….oh.

      Never mind, I don’t want to know. Irrational, self-absorbed people creating their own little hell on earth. Good for them.

      1. Virginia Postrel is that you?

  11. At least someone showed some skepticism with Hillary’s glib replies:

    “Sunday on ABC’s “This Week,” Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton compared the FBI investigation into her handling of classified material on her private email server during her tenure as secretary of state to the investigations into the 2012 Benghazi terror attacks saying, “I think it’s pretty clear they’re grasping at straws and this will turn out the same.”
    […]
    “STEPHANOPOULOS: You know, you’ve said many times that the emails were not marked classified. No evidence that that’s not true. But the non-disclosure agreement you signed as secretary of state said that that really is not that relevant. It says classified information is marked or unmarked classified and that all of your training to treat all of that sensitively and should know the difference.”
    http://www.breitbart.com/video…..at-straws/

    Her reply to that is insulting to anyone of average intelligence: ‘She didn’t do anything wrong, there are newspaper articles in there, damn rethuglicans!’!’

    1. She wrote those questions for him and her answers are prepared.

      What I didn’t see: “Madame Secretary, you did all of your business as Secretary of State on a private, unsecured email server and you never once received, as Secretary of State, classified information? How can it be that the business of the Secretary of State never involves classified information?”

      1. It also turns out that she never had an official .gov email address while SoS, so the claims of the State Department that they “didn’t know” about her private server are lies.

        1. This whole thing is just so ridiculous.

          I trust the FBI is building cases against a *lot* of clowns.

    2. “The final thing I would say because clearly the best answer to all of this is release and disclose these materials is that what I’m told is that this chain of emails very well included a published newspaper report.”

      Well said, Madame Secretary.

      Actually, the final thing she would say is “On the advice of counsel, I invoke my right under the Fifth Amendment not to answer.”

      1. “I’m told is that this chain of emails very well included a published newspaper report.”

        It also includes most every letter of the alphabet and quite a few common words, which, of course, is totally irrelevant.

      2. It probably included a lot of things that aren’t relevant to this issue. The issue is whether or not it included classified or top secret or need-to-know-only information, and apparently it did.

        The Clintons think they are being slick when they say this kind of shit but everyone can see right through it. How in the fuck did we let such dim-wits get where they are?

        1. She’s going down, and at this point she knows it.

          1. Her only way out is the Democrat nomination. She wins and the Obama admin will not allow her to be touched. If she loses, she’s useless to them and will be toast. Bernie will meet with an unfortunate accident if the voters don’t get in line. He’s probably already woken up with horse heads and dead cats in his bed.

            1. His sex life is none of your business.

            2. Bernie is never going to win. NH going for Bernie will just demonstrate how little relevance NH has.

    3. “”I think it’s pretty clear they’re grasping at straws and this will turn out the same.”

      Dead bodies, a CIA gun-running mission exposed, some innocent person thrown in jail, the 1st amendment blamed, and dozens sacrificed to protect a couple of incompetent political prima-donnas?

      Oh, I hope not.

    4. BTW, I doubt an indictment is close. Regardless of the ‘special’ favors she gets, I gotta presume that any indicting agency would give her legal staff a courtesy warning, and at that point, her song is gonna change drastically.
      I base this opinion on the fact that even Nixon wasn’t blind-sided

  12. But is it Ring Ring?

  13. Everyone probably already knew about the free Trump tattoos but me, but it’s too wonderful/horrible not to post
    And according to the CNN news ticker I saw they’re in “great demand”
    http://whnt.com/2016/01/30/mas…..p-tattoos/

    1. That’s truly disturbing.

      1. He’s the candidate that seemed like a good idea while you were in a drunken stupor

        1. “He’s the candidate that seemed like a good idea while you were in a drunken stupor”

          “Don’t The Girls All Get Prettier At Closing Time”
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdkRtmk4pTE

        2. He’s becoming like a cult of personality. The first time I saw him speaking after he announced, my bullshit meter went completely over in the red, alarms and sirens going off. For some reason, he’s had quite a different effect on a lot of people. I suspect it’s because people are rightfully pissed off at the establishment, but their judgement on what to do about it is astoundingly misguided.

          1. They’re not angry at the establishment that’s their excuse. They’re angry that non-white people make up more and more of America and that the government isn’t giving them as much pogey as they want. They are vaguely racist welfare-queen wannabes.

            1. You sound exactly like all the other unhinged progs. White people, OMG!

              1. The truth is the truth, and a prog can be a broken clock.

              2. Doesn’t change the fact that demography is a thing.

            2. Ugh. Broken clocks with no hands are always wrong Cytotoxic, and that’s you.

    2. I assume this is a ploy to get people to pay for expensive cover-ups.

      The bottom tat reminds of me this horrible Johnny Cash tattoo by UFC fighter Alan Belcher.

      1. which reminds me of the dead marshes from Lord of the Rings, like he’s eternally bound to the guy’s arm by supernatural forces and will pull me in if I stare too long and get too close

    3. Ah good now the retards are making it clear that they’re retards, so it’s easy to avoid fraternizing or associating with these “people”.

      1. When it comes to Bernie supporters, this is true. It’s like an economic illiteracy detector.

    4. OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE! This has been up for almost a half an hour and I have to be the one who asks “You know who else gave out free tattoos?”

      1. Lucifer de debil, that old serpent?

      2. Do you know who manically blamed others?

        1. Crusty after knocking up that ugly girl?

      3. Certain?cough? melanin-impaired prison gangs?

      4. “I have to be the one who asks “You know who else gave out free tattoos?””

        1066? It’s always 1066, isn’t it?
        Ooops, wrong class.

    5. The portrait with the combover has the combover going the wrong way. I noticed it today. I kept hearing the jokes about the guy’s hair but I never had looked at it really. I heard him on the TV, looked up and….geez, it’s awful.

  14. So, did ya’ll hear that the pope is voting for Hillary? That’s what some proggie on WaPo told me today. You see, Hillary cares about global warming and the poor and the pope cares about global warming and the poor. And so, it only makes sense that the pope would vote for Hillary.

    1. The Pope, a citizen of the Vatican a sovereign country, can vote in U.S. elections?

      1. Hey, I’m not the one who said it.

  15. I don’t have the link, but The Hill had an article about Trump’s negatives. Spoiler alert: they are still catastrophically high and much worse than even Hillary’s. He’s still unelectable.

    1. Most of your comrades are voting for Bernie. Why don’t you like Bernie?

      1. Canadians *could* vote for Bernie. Mind you, we never elected the NDP (the party Bernie would be a part of) to form the government at the Federal level which suggests we’re not all that insane. But then again, we’ve voted for them at the provincial level; even Little Texas Alberta did.

        1. I wasn’t talking about Canadians when I said comrades. That one is a leftist or I’m an alien from the planet Nibiru.

          1. Oh, I thought you knew Cytotoxic is Canadian.

            1. Who I thought you were referring to.

  16. President Obama Signs Executive Order Limiting US Gun Owners to Three Guns

    No U.S. citizen will be allowed to have more than three guns registered to them at any time. Possession of an unregistered firearm, expect those exempted from registration, will be a felony that carries a mandatory minimum sentence of ten years in federal prison. States that refuse to enforce the new laws will lose federal highway and Medicaid funding.

    http://abcnews.com.co/obama-si…..hree-guns/

    1. “If you look at the second amendment, you’ll see that it says that ‘a well-regulated militia is necessary to the security of a free state.’ Well, when I see kids getting shot at school and people gunning down their coworkers, I don’t see a well-regulated militia. I don’t see a state that is secure in its freedom. I see a nation in crisis. I see a country in desperate need of reform. If you want to exercise your right to bear arms, that’s fine, but if you want to do that, you should be ready and able to defend your country at a moment’s notice.”

      What a shallow, superficial, petty little progressive. I guess we can conclude, with the cap to three guns, this is the progressive ‘no one needs more than X’ strategy?

      The comments in the link are ugly.

    2. That’s got to be a parody site.

      1. A “parody site” fronted by the Obama administration as a way to float ideas in order to see what sort of reaction they cause?

  17. In addition to requiring firearm registration, all citizens who wish to own or possess a weapon will be required to obtain a gun operator’s license. Two licenses will be available. A class one license will grant its owner the legal right to purchase and possess firearms which do not require registration; they will also be allowed use a friend’s registered weapon or rent a registered weapon from a licensed shooting range, provided that they handle the weapon under the supervision of a class two license holder. In order to obtain a class one license, the individual must undergo a criminal background and mental health screening and complete a three day, government approved gun safety course. In order to obtain a class two license, the individual must commit to at least one weekend per month of military training and must be prepared to mobilize in case of a national emergency. The class two license will allow them to register up to three weapons for personal use. When not in use, the weapons and ammunition must be locked in separate, government approved cabinets. All ammunition sales, even those for unregistered weapons, will be registered in a national database, and strict limits will be placed on how much ammunition can be purchased.

    http://abcnews.com.co/obama-si…..hree-guns/

    1. Umm…check the homepage dude.

      1. Please tell me it’s a hoax!

        1. It’s a hoax, relax dude.

          1. whew!

            I was getting ready to vote for Trump for a second there.

            1. Did you read all of that? Shit like that would actually start a war. Even Obama is not that stupid.

        2. Maybe this will make you feel a little better:

          Donald Trump Announces Sheriff Joe Arpaio As His Vice Presidential Running Mate

          The other headlines are equally as ridiculous.

        3. Relax, It’s a hoax.

      2. El Chapo rides again!

      3. Somebody just sent me this, if it’s a hoax, I want to know quick.

        Wait.

        It’s abc.com.co rather than abc.com

        Is that what you’re saying?

          1. Thank gawd.

            1. Why? I wish Obama would actually try something like that. I think Democrats would be giving up on gun control as an issue for a very long time.

              1. I’ve lost my faith in the courts to protect our rights and the American people to stand up for our rights, too.

                Don’t trust anyone under 30. . . . and more of those bastards are born every day.

          2. That’s when I realized it was satire.

            But the idea he would cap gun ownership isn’t. I think that’s realistic.

      4. You know, it got me. It sounded exactly something he would say!

        1. That’s exactly what he would do if he could.

          1. Probably worse, no doubt.

    2. A joke? Fantasy?

      That is completely absurd on its face.

      1. So is everything else Obama does!

        1. Yeah, that is why it is so scary. He lives in bizarro universe so you never know if it is real or parody.

  18. “In addition to requiring firearm registration, all citizens who wish to own or possess a weapon will be required to obtain a gun operator’s license.”

    Fuck Barack Obama.

    1. Wait… he actually said that? I mean, in public?

      1. Look at the link!

        It’s a done deal according to that story. All done by executive order.

        “it is recommended that all U.S. gun owners begin to prepare themselves for the coming changes. If you are wondering how to register or surrender your weapons, or just want to learn more about the president’s new executive order, you can contact the ATF’s Firearms Registration Division at (202) 642-5720.

        http://abcnews.com.co/obama-si…..hree-guns/

        I was hoping it was a hoax!

        It’s soooooooo stupid, it’s either a hoax or ingenious according to Barack Obama.

        1. Did you read that? It can’t be true, has to be a hoax.

          1. I sure hope so. I’ve never hoped I was being trolled so bad before!

            And I wouldn’t put it past Obama to do exactly this.

            Poe’s Law.

          2. I am looking around, I am not seeing it anywhere else.

            It has got to be a hoax.

            1. The comments were too vicious. As I read them I wondered how a PC place like ABC would allow them. God, I’m slow.

        2. Here’s the legit abc news page:
          http://abcnews.go.com/

              1. OT and FYI, in case you didn’t see my comment about Futurism, I know it was a quote. I was ‘horse-playin” at your expense. Sometimes they fall flat. What can I do?

                1. I’m the one who didn’t get it. No worries.

            1. It’s crazy but the ABC logo should have given it away. The real ABC circle has a black backdrop; the faux site doesn’t.

              Sa-low.

              Mind you, I’m doing year-end taxes for work so I will excuse myself.

  19. Eyewash’: How the CIA deceives its own workforce about operations

    1. Need a little bit more information here.

  20. Crissy Poo is getting a tingle again:

    Crissy gets a tingle

    1. What’s wrong with that guy?

      Ever since he flopped on ‘Jeopardy’ he seems to have lost it.

    1. Maybe dog is not as tasty as our pork and beef?

    2. Chick actually gave 9.2 and 9.4 scores. Too funny.

      I really hope they don’t handle penises like they did those ribs.

    3. The second link isn’t spinning my propeller: ‘Darn; my employer can fire me! I want to be a lawyer and keep that from happening!’
      I think they want to go to, oh France.

    4. “Breesket?”
      “Brisket.”
      “Oh. I thought you said cat.”

      Funny.

  21. Speaking of ABCNEWS, a non hoax here:

    Fireball Spotted

    My wife and I saw this thing! We were walking back to our car parked in a garage. I was looking for the pedestrian entrance to the garage and my wife said ‘hey, look!’ and I turned around and she was pointing. It was a huge, I mean it appeared about the size of a full moon and very bright blazing white and then disappeared behind some building, like in that video, only from where we saw it, it was way larger. I’ve never seen a meteor fireball that big before. Kind of freaked me out, I thought maybe a plane exploded or something.

    1. A meteor? That’s just what they want you to think.

    2. Nice. I once saw one that passed so close overhead that I heard it. I thought a jet with a somewhat sputtery engine was passing overhead, but it was a meteor. I saw it break up before it fell into the ocean. (I didn’t see a splash, because it was late at night.)

  22. just before I saw the receipt that said $7527 , I accept that my mom in-law woz like actualey making money in there spare time from there pretty old laptop. . there aunt had bean doing this for less than twentey months and at present cleared the depts on there appartment and bourt a great new Citro?n 2CV . look here…….
    Clik This Link inYour Browser.
    ???????? http://www.Jobstribune.com

  23. ??My last pay check was $9500 working 12 hours a week online. My sisters friend has been averaging 15k for months now and she works about 20 hours a week. I can’t believe how easy it was once I tried it out. This is what I do..
    Clik This Link inYour Browser??….
    ???????? http://www.Jobstribune.com ?

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