Carly Fiorina

Carly Fiorina Uses Trump Dis to Her Advantage in New Campaign Ad

Yes, "look at this face," Fiorina demands.

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Gage Skidmore/Flickr

A new Carly Fiorina ad* puts a positive spin on fellow GOP presidential contender Donald Trump's recent looks-based critique of the rapidly rising candidate. In an interview published in Rolling Stone last week, Trump said of Fiorina: "Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?!" In her new ad, Fiorina echoes Trump's words but without the scorn, instead intoning with a commanding, defiant voice:

Ladies, look at this face, and look at all of your faces. The faces of leadership. The face of leadership in our party—the party of woman's suffrage. The face of leadership in your communities, in your businesses, in your places of work and worship. … This is the face of a 61-year-old woman and I am proud of every year and every wrinkle.

Fiorina and Trump will share the stage at this Wednesday's Republican presidential debate on CNN. "Their showdown is emerging as one of the most intriguing subplots of the second debate," wrote Amy Chozick and Patrick Healy today in The New York Times. "Fiorina started her long-shot candidacy by taking direct aim at (Hillary) Clinton, but she now appears poised to be the best candidate to bring out the side of Mr. Trump that has drawn accusations of misogyny—a tactic some Republicans hope Mrs. Fiorina will embrace on Wednesday." 

Fiorina has remained remarkably composed throughout her campaign so far, not shying away from responding to attacks directly but also avoiding the petulance ascribed to Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) or the anger some other candidates are given to indulging. If she can keep it up Wednesday, it could be even more to her advantage in contrast with Trump's temper and bombast. Of course, those traits are why Trump fans love him, so Trump, too, could benefit from a Fiorina showdown. In any event, it should be good spectacle. In the meantime, check out Fiorina's new ad, "Faces":

* I previously stated that the ad came from Fiorina's campaign; it's actually from the Fiorina super PAC Carly for America.

NEXT: 'Nobody knows I'm a lesbian' T-shirt banned in South Carolina high school [UPDATE: the school has backed down]

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  1. I didn’t know there was a horse in the race.

    1. *horsefaceplam*

      1. Every time I look at a picture of Trump, I see a horse’s ass.

        1. could be your glasses need cleaning or your cataracts need surgery, too… 🙂

    2. As much as I like Trump, he went over the line with Carly, but that’s the way he fights and I’m OK with that. Hell, I think he’s the only republican politician in my lifetime willing to fight dirty, and that’s exactly what we need to save our country, if it’s not already too late.

      Can you imagine how Trump will chew Hillary up and spit her out? I think it will be the best moment of my life, I can’t wait.

      But Trump, there’s nothing wrong with Carly’s looks. I’d do her in a heartbeat!

  2. The more I see and hear of Carly the more I like her. She’d make a far better president than any of the other idiots running.

    1. Me too – she’s really impressed me so far. I think she and I share some of the same views of women’s roles in our society and politics.

      1. I’ve had a positive view of her ever since she ran for Senate in California and happily voted for her over Boxer (then again, I’d vote for anyone over Boxer). Really impressed by her campaign so far. She’s hitting all the right notes and hasn’t stumbled yet–which is more than any of her competition can claim.

        1. Do go on…

      2. I think she and I share some of the same views of women’s roles in our society and politics.

        Which are what, exactly? Honestly curious.

        1. That they should go around dressing people up like the mailman and make them dance for them while they go and smoke crack in their bedroom and have sex with some guy I don’t even know on my dad’s bed?

        2. That they should be barefoot and pregnant while cooking in the kitchen always ready to please her man?

          Just a guess.

    2. She certainly seems to be a better campaigner than any of the rest.

      I like her. She’s got cojones, and I suspect a good deal of administrative talent.

      Still not superclear on her policy positions, though. But, they could hardly be worse than most of the other candidates.

      1. This is my take as well, I’ll be interested when she lays out her policy positions. I like her personality so far, she seems confident yet lacks the smugness of Obumbles or Hildog. We’ll see I suppose.

        1. Running a Fortune 20 into the ground will teach you a little bit of humility I imagine. 😉

          But she does have a quite confidence without any smugness. I find this really refreshing.

          1. I don’t know the details about her term there, but I know from personal experience that HP headed for the ground before she took over.

            1. True…. a friend of mine who got to HP before me said some of the seeds of destruction began as early as with John “Numbers Man” Young, who allegedly forecast in a corporate-wide internal announcement his estimate for “next-quarter’s profit levels…” … TO TWO DECIMAL PLACES.

              Fucking insanity, and he should have been drawn and quartered for even thinking like that, but hey… Wall Street just loves sucking the teat of forecasts like that… and then punishing any ‘leader’ who doesn’t ‘make his numbers.’

              Ones that followed JY made their shares of mistakes, too. It was saddening to watch helplessly as the poor decisions rolled out.

              But such is life, and most of that is ‘water over the dam,’ but if history repeats (or even rhymes), taking a close look at Carly NOW sounds to me like a good idea.

            2. Very true. Still, it was painfully obvious to just about anybody who worked with or for either company that the Compaq + HP merger was going to be a disaster, and I am certain now and back then that she was going to ram that through because it was the hip thing for CEOs to do at that time. It was going to be a star on her resume, until she blew it.

              I do have to wonder about the sheer amount of grandiosity necessary to try such a difficult endeavor and shove it down everyone’s throats. It is like a televangelist Don Quixote…

    3. I really think she will win the nomination. The Republican voters are looking for an outsider and Trump and Carson are too prone to saying and doing dumb things to actually win the nomination.

      I know she was a train wreck at HP, but the 2004 and 2012 elections show that incompetence is not a show stopper for a presidential candidate.

      1. I know she was a train wreck at HP

        That’s the narrative, anyway. Not sure how true it really is.

        1. Wikipedia Says:

          In 2002, Fiorina oversaw the biggest high-tech merger in history up to that time, with rival computer company Compaq, which made HP the world’s largest personal computer manufacturer. The deal was controversial as analysts were not convinced of its strategic value and it was publicly opposed by several board members and shareholders. Following HP’s gain in market share as a result of the 2002 merger, Fiorina laid off 30,000 U.S. employees. By 2004 the number of HP employees was about the same as the pre-merger total of HP and Compaq combined, and that 2004 number included roughly 8,000 employees of companies acquired by HP since 2001.

          On February 9, 2005, the HP board of directors forced Fiorina to resign as chief executive officer and chairman over disagreements about the company’s performance, disappointing earning reports, and her resistance to transferring authority to division heads. At that time, HP had about 150,000 employees. Its stock price had fallen by approximately half its value compared to when Fiorina had started, while the overall NASDAQ index had decreased by about a quarter owing to turbulence in the tech sector.

          She took over just after the tech bubble burst and rode that horse into the dirt. I’m not sure anyone should be blamed for that (except for the management before the bubble burst).

        2. If it was her idea to buy Compaq, yes. If she just managed the post-merger administration, maybe. Buying an inferior computer maker with market share and not fixing their QC problems sucks. But its not like fucking the dog on Libya and Syria bad.

          1. In early September 2001, in the wake of the bursting of the Tech Bubble, Fiorina announced the acquisition of Compaq with $25 billion in stock, which, at the time, was the second largest producer of personal computers, after Dell. HP stock traded down by 30% on the news of the merger. The Compaq merger created the world’s largest personal computer manufacturer by units shipped.

            Fiorina frequently clashed with HP’s board of directors and she had to fight with the board for the merger. Fiorina won the proxy battle with 51.4% of the shareholders with the institutional shareholders providing the bulk of the support. Fiorina was supported in the proxy battle by other board members that included Richard Hackborn, Philip M. Condit, George A. Keyworth, II, and Robert Knowling.

            The merger was implemented despite strong opposition from board member Walter Hewlett (the son of company co-founder William Hewlett). Hewlett originally voted with the other board members to approve the Compaq deal, but he later changed his mind. Hewlett launched a proxy fight against Fiorina’s efforts, which failed, receiving 48.6% opposition among HP’s shareholders.

            Sounds like she owned the merger. Not that I would hold that against her.

            1. I wouldn’t either if Compaq had come up to HP’s quality, but everything Comapq branded sucked balls. Well after the merger. And HP stopped being as high quality.

              1. My experience was that HP had some arrogance problems even before the merger. If your HP printer was having IRQ conflicts with some other peripheral, HPs solution was always to make the other device change or get rid of it. There was no way to change the HP device and they never made any effort to be more flexible.

        3. My impression is that CEOs almost always get more praise than they deserve when something good happens on their watch and more blame than they deserve when something bad happens.

          I don’t know anything about running a Fortune top 20 company but I do know that good managers can make bad bets, and bad managers can make good bets.

          In the end, I’m more interested in what she learned from the issues at HP than what she thought she knew going in.

    4. I’ll concede there does seem to be a lot to like about her. The only thing that bothers me is that I really don’t have a clue as to what she’s actually for. I look at her website, and she doesn’t have an issues section. Even her comments on the stump make little mentin of what she wants to do.

      Yes, she’s not Hillary Clinton. And she has a vagina.

      Yes, she’s not Donald Trump. And she’s an outsider.

      But, really, what’s her agenda? She could be only marginally less libertarian than Rand Paul. Or she could be could be George W. Bush and Donald Trump all rolled into one giant pile of suck. It isn’t at all clear.

      1. That’s how it is these days. We need to elect a politician to find out what they stand for.

        1. Hell, that’s always been the case.

          There’s a reason why “campaign promise” is a non sequitur.

      2. From my research she seems to be traditionally conservative

        1. Not completely. Doesn’t she deviate from the “trad con” in abortion issues?

          1. I guess so, but she is still closer to how most Americans view abortion than, say, Hillary

          2. Does she? Or is it now “trad con” to say you believe a four-weeks-pregnant rape victim should carry to term like Walker or Rubio?

            1. I don’t know. That is why it was a question. What do you think, Nikki?

              1. She’s definitely pro-life. She’s been hammering on the Planned Parenthood story. She wasn’t willing to say she didn’t believe in health/life of the mother exceptions, or exceptions for rape and incest. I would call that pretty traditional.

                1. According to Wiki she supports a ban after 20 weeks with an exception to rape, incest, risk to the mother.

      3. Can she suck a golf ball through 30′ of garden hose? the true determinent of presidential potential.

    5. She ran for California Senator. At the state convention she happened to have her booth right next to the one I was working in. She brought in poli-sci majors from nearby colleges. Most of these kids were far to the left of Bernie. It doesn’t help your campaign much when your staff is actively insulting every Republican that walks by. One twerp was so obnoxious I’m sure he personally cost her five percentage points in the election.

      Campaign Rule #2: If you can’t find enough volunteers for your campaign, don’t bother running. If you have to hire your own cheerleaders, you’re going to lose.

    6. Poll HP employees and ex-employees for possibly a slightly different view.
      I was there for her entire reign, as she worked to complete the destruction of the ethics and morals of the HP Way and fly the company into the ground with a “Downsizing To Success” policy.

      One bright note… if she could pull it off as President, downsizing government and cost-cutting just MIGHT be the best thing for the US, but hey, I still prefer a guy (person) who’s had some success running businesses for profit.

      Unlike the current guy, whose only ‘experience’ was as a Community Organizer… what a wonderful CV for a President, eh?

      Not!

      1. All the old tech giants did that exact same thing. I was at IBM at the time, they’re still downsizing to success even today.

    7. I really enjoyed watching her make a punching bag of Chris Matthews. At the end of the interview, even he knew he had just had his ass handed to him.

    8. She indulges in corporate speak nonsense. Foreign policy: she is clueless and toes the neocon line. She acts like meeting Bibi should be the first priority of her tenure as president. The same Bibi who is more interested in ridiculous propaganda about iran being a month away from the bomb during the 90s and again in the 00s. What is his concept of time when he makes these presentations?And she puts that much weight into what he says?

      This is a woman who worked hard at Lucent, difd all the right corporate things and somehow rose to the top there. Since she left that place, she has been one big failure.

      Even a guy like Trump who is prone to hyperbole has more good ideas than she does even if she hides behind the veneer of corporate speak.

      As far as her ad, she is so delusional when she makes the wrinkles remark because she seems to be unaware of the immense botox procedures on her face and not self aware enough to know that she made fun of Boxer’s hair when she was running agianst her. So I don’t feel sorry for her when TRump makes that comment.

  3. I worked with a guy that came from HP, and he hated Carly with a passion.

    But, I can’t help but feeling she’s the only adult in the room at this time.

    1. Real leaders made hard decisions that aren’t always popular.

      1. And dumb leaders make bad decisions that destroy businesses.

        You’re only a genius or an idiot in retrospect.

        1. She didn’t destroy HP. If she did they wouldn’t be around would they?

          Interestly, the Compaq/HP merger helped them consolidate and become the largest server vendor in the market. Dell had to go private to survive, IBM got out of the business. That’s a pretty good strategic decision that 10 years ago put HP where it is now.

      2. I’m not sure many people view their boss with detached reason.

        1. I was laid off from Toshiba when my position was eliminated, and later laid off from Western Digital because my job was outsourced. I didn’t take it personally. The leadership made decisions that were in the best interest of the company but not in my best interests.

      3. If the previous entry on her resume wasn’t “Lucent”, I would be inclined to agree.

        1. At least she stepped up, took chances, and learned (I assume) from her mistakes. That’s more than you can say about any of these other career politicians. I’d rather take a chance with someone who tried and failed over someone who never even attempted anything of note (like Obama).

            1. That goes double for you, squirrels.

    2. Churchill was given power again after Gallipoli. Sometimes mistakes are just that. Maybe she learned something in between. More adult than any of the professional politicians.

      1. If you listen to that Hardcore podcast Galliopoli wasn’t all on Churchill but on bureaucracy being slow.

        1. Churchill was the driving force behind the audacious maneuver, though.

    3. I keep hearing this about her, and it makes me wonder how often there are CEO’s at Fortune 500 companies that the rank-and-file employees just love. It’s a pretty rare occurrence.

    4. Speaking in a low tone doesnt mean she is an adult. She is clueless about the middle east and foreign policy in general. She parrots whatever the neocons say. She is a religious freak. I dont see where she is for less government in terms of reducing spying on the americans.

      Trump, Rand Paul at least have some ideas that mean something even if you disagree with them on some isssues(and they seem to dislike each other). I am little disappointed in Rand Paul’s campaign because I expected a little more boldness from him. But at least he had the guts to spout some unpopular views at the debate.

  4. I don’t see her coming down to Trump’s level on this. Moderators, however, will likely push the issue.

  5. That’s a great ad.

    1. She has run one of the better campaigns a republican has run in a while.

    2. Unless you are a man, who were, conspicuously, absent from it.
      Women are very predictable, kinda like the blacks, just not as rabid.
      Married women with children seem to have figured it out.

  6. But what about Kim Davis?

  7. I can’t stop laughing at this. Here is an actual exchange of emails that occurred at Oberlin College:

    “”Hey, that talk looks pretty great,” a white student wrote to a Hispanic student, “but on the off chance you aren’t going or would rather play futbol instead the club team wants to go!!””

    Hispanic student’s Response: “Ok. 1. Thanks for you thinking that the talk is “pretty great”. I appreaciate your white male validation. I see that it isn’t interesting enough for you to actually take your ass to the talk. 2. Who said it was ok for you to say futbol? It’s Latino Heritage Month, your telling people not to come to the talk, but want to use our language? Trick NO! White students appropriating the Spanish language, dropping it in when convenient, never ok. Keep my heritage language out your mouth! If I’m not allowed to speak it, if my dad’s not allowed to speak it, then bitch you definitely are not supposed to be speaking it. Especially in this context.”

    On the bright side, this Latino student isn’t appropriating my native language since he doesn’t appear to know how to speak it.

    1. Aw c’mon, that’s not real. That’s parody level.

      1. It was reported by Conor Friedersdorf in the Atlantic, so it’s not like I got it from some random email that’s getting circulated.

        1. Gah. I found it here. The response is just as bad.

          You do not get to define who I am. Fuck off. Clearly you only see me at face value and yes I’m white and male, what do you want me to do about that? (LEAVE THE SOCCER TEAM) I have a second family that I have spent a good portion of my life with. My brothers Paco Rafa and Diego my mom Julie my grandmother Margo and my father Arnoldo. Technically their my god-family but for all intensive purposes they are my family, call me their 4th son, and I am extremely close with them. My father came from Costa Rica as a fourteen year old boy, living, working and studying through an education program jointly coordinated by the catholic church and UC Berkeley. My 2nd family is Costa Rican, and I am a part of that family no matter what you say. I’m not claiming to be latino and I don’t think I’ve ever claimed that, but I do have a latino family and you trying to separate me from them, to create distance that doesn’t exist based purely on how you incorrectly perceive me, is terribly offensive.

          1. Your anger with the white male patriarchy is justified, (THANKS!) and the social system of America perpetuates injustice by giving unfair advantages to white people, to wealthy people, and to men. Now i realize I’m getting into your area of study, and not mine (OR MY LIFE), but these systems are perpetuated because of human tendencies to favor people like themselves (ABSOLOUTELY WRONG AND RACIST, WHAT IS COLIANLISM AND WHAT IS CAPITALISM) – and because positions of power in this country are generally held by white males, white males receive huge advantages. Advantages that they do not deserve. Growing up as a white male in this society, I have benefited countless times from these advantages that I did not and do not deserve, but growing up I was generally not even aware that I was gaining an advantage – it was the only reality I knew. This is a question I have truly struggled with through my life – I don’t deserve these advantages, but they exist for me, I never sought them out, I didn’t want them and cant give them away, what am I supposed to do?

            1. Hmm, what is colianlism?

              1. If you have to ask, you can’t afford it sister.
                *pimp walks off*

              2. It’s when people invade your ass on behalf of their own country and take up residence there.

            2. but for all intensive purposes they are my family

              Not gonna lie – I stopped short right there. runglee runglio – I could go no further.

              DERP!

            3. Jesus, look what steeping in muck at Oberlin does to you.

              1. The site is worth a visit, if only to cement in your mind how insane these people are.

                I was working in the gym last week and a group of Professors were talking about the upcoming marriage of one professor.

                She professed how pleased she was that she and her husband both had blue eyes and that they’d be “preserving the gene” despite all of the mixing of backgrounds going on.

                None of the other professors thought there was anything wrong with this, or said anything other than that “technically the gene won’t get eradicated”.

                I don’t want casual racism in my professors or in our shared college spaces.

                1. And I’m sure that same person later screamed about preserving some cultural practice, Lee G.

                2. She professed how pleased she was that she and her husband both had blue eyes and that they’d be “preserving the gene” despite all of the mixing of backgrounds going on.

                  None of the other professors thought there was anything wrong with this, or said anything other than that “technically the gene won’t get eradicated”.

                  WOW. I’m trying to think of which department(s) would have professors that make any part of this acceptably passable. Astronomy, Physics, and Mathematics maybe?

                3. so eye color is a race now?

                4. So they don’t teach Hardy-Weinberg at Oberlin? Interesting.

            4. white males receive huge advantages. Advantages that they do not deserve. Growing up as a white male in this society, I have benefited countless times from these advantages that I did not and do not deserve

              Examples needed.

              1. He got into college despite being functionally illiterate, but I guess the Latino guy did too.

              2. Well, he did get in to Oberlin without a basic grasp of the English Language.

              3. I tell this to my daughter whenever she asks where I am going, “Sweetie, I’m a white male in a white-male dominated society. I go wherever the fuck I want.”

              4. Examples would imply such a statement had any basis in reality.
                I liked :”…and because positions of power in this country are generally held by white males, white males receive huge advantages.
                Still trying to figure out how that happens anywhere but in the imagination of libtards/progtards.

            5. Jeebus, do any of these fucktards know basic grammar and spelling?

              1. grammar and spelling are cis shitlord patriarchial indicators of white male privilege.

            6. I thought Oberlin was a decent liberal arts school. Now I come to find out they can’t even speak-a da Eengleesh.

            7. Fuck yourself in the ass with a rusty spike, asshat!

              “Intensive purposes”… asshole.

            8. Welcome to Bizarro which is filled with useful idiots.

          2. “but for all intensive purposes”

            NICOLE PICK UP THE WHITE COURTESY PHONE

            Also:

            “Hours before the event I got an email from a member of my soccer team (Pussy Whipped, that has way too many white people on it for me to ever show up again. Aside, I already learned last semester when I failed Co-ed indoor soccer that I would never play soccer with white people when I couldn’t even bear it enough to show up for half a credit (aprox. Worth $1,000)).”

            HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

            HAAHAHAHAHAHAH

            This person failed a co-ed indoor soccer course for half credit and blames it on white people. This is so ridiculous that if I hadn’t actually had discussions with SJWs in the past I wouldn’t believe this is real.

            1. This person failed a co-ed indoor soccer course for half credit and blames it on white people.

              Despite admitting that it was because he didn’t show up.

            2. You know correcting their writing is oppressive, Irish.

              1. Everything is oppressive. I’ve read thru most of the blog and it is readily apparent that there are quite a few students at Oberlin who know that trolling the SJWs is an incredibly productive activity, if pointless.

            3. Aside, I already learned last semester when I failed Co-ed indoor soccer that I would never play soccer with white people when I couldn’t even bear it enough to show up for half a credit

              How do these people get in to college?

              I guess this girl just can’t play the sport with white people, because apparently we’re more aggressive in soccer than… Latinos. Uh-huh.

              1. Pretty sure both parties are male. Could be wrong.

                1. Eunuchs, perhaps…

                2. I guess I’m not sure what student we’re talking about now, but the original “futbol” story reported in the Atlantic had a woman complaining about the white guy offending her.

          3. for all intensive purposes

            Oh for fuck’s sake.

            1. In such a doggy dog environment as Oberlin, improper use of the language is a mute point.

    2. Furthermore:

      “Your not latino, call it soccer. You don’t play futbol. Futbol is played with people (LATINO) who know how to engage in community soccer, as somebody who grew up on the cancha (soccer field) I know what playing futbol is, and the way you take up space, steal the ball, don’t pass, is far from how my culture plays ball.

      I’m not playing intramural once again this semester because you and your cis-dude, non passing the ball, stealing the ball from beginners, spanish-mocking, white cohort has ruined it (for the second time). Unless I find another team you won’t be seeing me.

      I don’t care if this email is over the top or mean. So complain to whatever white friends you want about it. You’re never going to know what its like to not be able to your own heritage sport comfortably because of your gender/race/ethnicity.”

      I like that soccer is this person’s ‘heritage sport’ even though it was invented in England. I think this Hispanic should stop culturally appropriating my Anglo-Saxon heritage.

      1. Oh, man. If I was the target of that email, I would do everything I could to keep the chain going. The Brit-invented “heritage sport” would be an excellent start on needling this entitled, thin-skinned, piece of crap.

        Who may be as Latino as Elizabeth Warren is Native American. There’s a certain thin-skinned defensiveness that makes me wonder . . . .

        1. The Brit-invented “heritage sport” would be an excellent start on needling this entitled, thin-skinned, piece of crap.

          And, when you come looking for the trophy, it’s spelled Fu?ball.

      2. White students appropriating the Spanish language

        As I’ve been telling you for ages, dagos aren’t white!

        /Colonel Cunningham Reeves-Smythe, Viscount Bradford, Guards Cavalry Bde. (retired)

        1. Are we sure the white person isn’t a “white Hispanic?” Cause you can never tell.

      3. By this line of reasoning, the MLB should boot all Hispanics from baseball and only teenage girls in the Northeast are allowed to play basketball.

      4. “Your not latino, call it soccer. You don’t play futbol. Futbol is played with people (LATINO) who know how to engage in community soccer, as somebody who grew up on the cancha (soccer field) I know what playing futbol is, and the way you take up space, steal the ball, don’t pass, is far from how my culture plays ball.

        That’s why the USA has pretty much owned CONCACAF for the last two decades, culo.

      5. I watched Latin American soccer. The hell they don’t take up space, don’t steal the ball, and pass the ball like it’s some microcosm of communism where everyone gets a turn. They play fucking brutal and it is an awesome thing to watch.

        When there’s no REAL football on that is 😛

      6. I know what playing futbol is, and the way you take up space, steal the ball, don’t pass, is far from how my culture plays ball.

        That’s right. Real Hispanic soccer is characterized by high kicks, cleats-up slides from behind, tackling over the top of the ball, lots of elbows, and spitting.

      7. got beat up as a kid much?

    3. Is (s)he appropriating pimp culture or ho culture by calling him “trick”?

    4. Hombre needs to chill out.

    5. I could murder this person and not feel a shred of guilt. There aren’t many people on Earth I could say that about…

  8. She also comes off really good in interviews and debates, I’m not gonna say she has a chance to win but I bet she has a flavor of the month moment after the next debate.

    1. If my dream ticket of Biden/Trump will never happen, I’d love for GOP to go Fiorina/Carson. The levels of howling from Democrats would be epic, especially if they go with Two White Guys (Biden/Edwards? Biden/Sanders would almost be dream-worthy).

    2. If she took some political/social issue cues from ENB Fiorina would likely have all the Libertarian boys, and probably a coupla girls, cumming tankards every single fucking day. Imagine a fucking female Libertarian-styled president. An galactic-transcendental political moment I should think. Jesus fucking Mohammed up the butter with a basket of fishies!

      1. Imagine a fucking female Libertarian-styled president

        Why imagine? Here’s a short version of what that would look like.

        Here’s the part 1 of whole glorious 40 minutes.

  9. Frankly, I trust her fucking institutional ass as far as I can throw it. But, I’d thoroughly enjoy watching her jerk Trump’s goddamn ass into the woodshed and then proceed to beat the fucking liquids out of him.

    I hate people who swash-buckle without a pirate ship and Trump swash-buckles with hotels and golf courses which means he isn’t a goddamn swash-buckler at all and just a fucking run-of-the-mill clever establishment tyrant.

    1. ^This.

      1. It’s like he read my mind…
        *heads to therapist’s office.*

        1. Why? Does your therapist have a side biz in, umm, interesting chemicals?

          AC rocks the house, again.

          proceed to beat the fucking liquids out of him.

          Solid gold, my man.

          1. No, it just reminded me I have a meth deal at a the rapist’s office.

            1. Is this a typo?
              I hope it ain’t a typo.
              This hiku is dumb.

            2. STEVE SMITH, THE RAPIST

              Don’t say you weren’t warned.

    2. “I hate people who swash-buckle without a pirate ship”

      You need to write a book.

      1. Compared to rest of you brilliant fucks an envelope is more my speed.

        1. Maybe you could do book translations. You know, take a book and then translate it into your cyborg language. That would be the awesome!

          1. AC, if you do this, please start with the federalist papers.

            1. ^^^^^
              THIS.

              Instead of Publius, maybe we can get “Agilius?”

        2. If you would stop buying tape measures you would have more free time to write a book, AC. Stop buying tape measures!

    3. Now these are some swashbucklers that would give trump a run for his money:

      https://youtu.be/aSO9OFJNMBA?t=1m59s

    4. “I hate people who swash-buckle without a pirate ship”

      I’m afraid I’m going to have to borrow the ever-living shit out of that. Well done.

    5. “Beat the fucking liquids out of him” is one of the most beautiful phrases i have ever read, and i hope someone pisses me off bad enough that i can use it real soon.

    6. You’re my lucid dream where the tv is stuck on the political channel and everyone speaks both accurately and with great flourish.

    7. Yeah, yeah.
      Hitch you wagon to Rand and proceed to Loserville.
      But, first, ask why he scuttled the effort to find out how the Senate was considered a “small business”, so that the entire body, and their staffs, could escape Oblamocare.

  10. She seems more promising than every Republican candidate other than Rand Paul, but since “conservatives” have decided that the direction they want to go in involves an egomaniac with zero conservative principles, I assume she has little to no chance to be taken seriously.

    1. At the risk of getting all true scotsman-y, I don’t think conservatives are the ones generally in favor of Trump

      1. I was referring to the popular, mainstream, Sean Hannity/Rush Limbaugh/Ann Coulter conservatives, who do have a lot of influence.

        1. It just goes to show how those people are mere entertainers. They see that their audience like rants based upon xenophobia and economic ignorance, so that’s what they deliver.

    2. Dont confuse one debate demeanor to be a sign of wisdom. She has had ample practice at corproate meetings to project bullshit as gravitas.

  11. Alt-text is da bomb!
    Do pepole still say “da bomb”?
    Or am I just old?

    1. The kids now say bomb-diggity. That is what it hip.

      1. Kids don’t say anything these days, they text it.

        Kthnxbai

          1. You all bougie and shits lookin down on me, Crust Jizzle.

  12. Trump’s gonna need some aloe for that burn.

  13. Here is Wikipedia’s take on her postions, for anyone wondering.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carly_Fiorina

    1. Research a candidate?

      We don’t even read the articles, and you’re expecting us to have an informed opinion on something?

      1. It’s true. I usually get about halfway through the headline before getting bored and jumping to the comments section.

        1. I only come here for the comments section.

    2. I heard once Wikipedia had an accurate unbiased article about some Japanese cartoon from the 80s that wasn’t heavy edited by Cultural Marxists pushing their ideological agenda…

      Once.

    3. ooooh Wikipedia, the font of all things fucked up beyond belief…

  14. Trump has admitted on national TV that he has been part of the corrupting of our political system. Why would anyone believe he would clean up the mess he helped create. If all the candidates would tell reporters that if they want to talk about Trump go talk to Trump. If they want to talk about issues then ask any question they want. The leftist news media would rather talk about stupidity than serious policy questions because queen Hillary can not answer serious questions.

    1. Why would anyone believe he would clean up the mess he helped create.

      If we did not believe him then we would be losers.

      1. #boredofwinning

  15. Rand Paul was being petulant?

    When did that happen?

    1. The Eye Roll that Doomed America?

  16. I like her attitude so far. Not as crazy about her policies from what I’ve heard, but I don’t think she’d be disastrous.

    1. So I actually need to backtrack. I actually looked up some details of her policy positions and she sounds pretty decent on balance. I’d probably butt heads with her on immigration (but that seems par for the course these days) and foreign policy (ditto), but she talks a decent talk on other issues.

      1. Any interest I might’ve had in her positions evaporated when I saw her advocating for Fed backdoors in electronic encryption.

  17. Carly is a smart person and is a pretty good candidate. She is making mistakes that are making me think she’s not gonna last:
    She keeps qualifying her firing from HP as “a boardroom brawl”. Stop it. You got canned and that happens to good managers. You sound whiny when you try to qualify it. (Or join the Kasich “my father was a mailman” lame ass tells.)
    She needs to get a sense of frikin’ humor. If he makes fun of your horseface, make fun of his hair or his dick. Smile, laugh and have fun.
    Stop thinking you’re gonna win because your the A student and have all the answers. People want to know you can think on your feet and solve problems not impress us with your Jeopardy! skills.

  18. If it has been mentioned sorry, but on lunch and couldn’t read all comments. Her performance on Seth Meyers and how she bought his domain name in the green room is frickin awesome. Don’t know enough about her, but it is good that she is in the race. Well worth a watch…

    http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-…..hmeyersorg

  19. The real question here at Hit and run is can any writer at reason write about the economy?

    And yes it is THE issue of the 2016 election.

    Can ENB do it? Let see:

    A head line about horse faces and a link to rolling stone….

    Yup…that is a big nope. I would go to zero hedge and probably will but i have the funny feeling that for the next year or two every article there will simply be 1000 to 2000 words of “I told you so”

  20. Image Alt-text:

    “Like a cunt being sucked into a clear vacuum tube”

    Put that into your campaign ad and smoke it.

  21. I’d climb McKinley in flip-flops and tightey-whities to cast my ballot in hand-carved stone for Fiorina, before I would roll out of bed and scratch my ass with my least favorite finger, to vote for Trump.

  22. You go, Carly! You are the best possible Trump slayer. Have at the Beast, my Lady! Strike at his feet!

  23. Yeah Carly. The same hypocrite who gets a frequent botox discount, yet makes an ad bragging about how proud she is of her wrinkles. We are not some corporate shills to act like the emperor hsa clothes on. She makes fun of Barbara Boxer’s hair but Trump is somehow mean when he makes an off the cuff informal comment about her ugly looks and boring demeanor? She looks like a smoothed out version of Eric Stolz’s mask with Peggy Noonan’s affected delivery.

    She is a right winger whose only moderate policies are self interest (women’s issues in the workplace).

  24. Soooo when you say she won, you mean all the other candidates died or had to give her all their money/property? Could you define “winning” a little bit more precisely like…”I felt a tingle run up my leg when she spoke and none of the others got my panties quite so damp”?

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