Clinton Sorry to Be 'Confusing,' Kim Davis Says She Won't Resign, Obama Meets Saudi King: P.M. Links

• Kim Davis says she won't resign and any marriage licenses her staff give out today are void.
• Los Angeles is launching a task force on electronic dance music. 
• Hillary Clinton is sorry her repeated lies havve "been confusing to people." 
• President Obama today met with King Salman of Saudi Arabia, who's still not on board with the Iran nuclear deal. 
• CNN has already sold all but one commercial slot for its scheduled September GOP debate despite significantly higher-than-average ad rates. 

New at Reason: 

• A Quiet Hero of the 9/11 Attacks Speaks Out: Documentary recounts tale of Marine who braved rubble to rescue cops. —Glenn Garvin
• The Alternative Medicine Racket: How the Feds Fund Quacks: The NIH has spent $5.5 billion on bringing quackery—from faith healing to homeopathy—right into the heart of the American medical establishment. —Todd Krainin

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

Kim Davis says she won't resign and any marriage licenses her staff give out today are void.

It's only the godly thing to do.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Hello.

"Hillary Clinton is sorry her repeated lies havve "been confusing to people."

But not as confusing of pronouncing 'have' with two v's!

/smirk. Grin.

Whatever.

[commodious spittoon]

Goodwife Davis will not countenance your sinful buggery.

[jesse.in.mb]

I'm sure an earthquake is on its way right now to release her from prison.

[Rich]

"Behold His mighty finger!"

[The Hyperbole]

"Don't stand there gawping! Like you've never seen the hand o' God before!"

[C. Anacreon]

Are you referring to the James Bond classic "Stink Finger"?

I loved that Shirley Bassey title song:

"Stink Finger
He's the man, the man with the odious touch
Don't smell his crutch..."

and so on....

[Trials and Trippelations]

I lol'd

[cavalier973]

And without those licenses, your relationship is invalid.

[jesse.in.mb]

...Said the IRS

[cavalier973]

Marriage is nothing but a set of visitation rights and tax consequences.

[Trials and Trippelations]

This is the place for baby announcements, right?

My wife and I are expecting a future libertarian or anarchist in March. And now the beer is all mine.

[C. Anacreon]

Congratulations!
First kid?

[Trials and Trippelations]

Yes!

[WoodchipperPatriarch]

Get a prescription for provigil. It makes the first few months bearable.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

He's not the one who has to get up for feedings.

[Jerryskids]

After the provigil, try Klonopin to make the next 20 years bearable.

[Raven Nation]

Congrats

[jesse.in.mb]

Congrats! Are you going to give your children historically anarchic names?

I think Bakunin would be a delightful first name.

Bakunin Trippelations the third.

[Trials and Trippelations]

Hmm that one did not pass the naming committee

[jesse.in.mb]

Batting zero here. Playa wouldn't take my suggestion of Jamal either.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Jamal died in a wad of bathroom tissue.

[Trials and Trippelations]

Maybe the problem is the source material. What baby book are you using?

[jesse.in.mb]

...God and the State?

Seriously though, either don't try to give your kid a unique name, or go really off the rails with an obscure Russian anarchist name. Anything in between will net you three three kids in their kindergarten class with a name you think might have been your great grandmother's and a bunch of back-biting about who stole what name from whom.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Baby book? Google.

All 3 of my kids are J names, the baby being the result of a poor birth control regimen.

Jesse was pushing for a 4th named Jamal, because he's racist.

[jesse.in.mb]

Jesse was pushing for a 4th named Jamal, because he's racist.

Hey, I'm not the one that balked at naming my son Jamal.

[PapayaSF]

Never give a kid a name that would give even a moment's pause to any employer.

[Brett L]

Mine are Bill and Ted. Which means if we have a third his name is either Rufus, Station, or Death.

[Trials and Trippelations]

We probably won't have a name until 3 days after the birth due to gridlock

[Brett L]

All joking aside, this is basically how my kids got named.

[Copernicus would chip]

Let's hope your county clerk doesn't object for religious reasons.

[Ted S.]

Theodore is a nice name.

Seriously, it's traditional and not overly common.

[AceDroman]

Says the guy named Ted

[Trials and Trippelations]

Ha I didn't pick up on that

[C. Anacreon]

It's also the name of one of the Chipmunks, so it's got that going for it.

[In League with the Dark Ones]

He's the chubby naive one, too...

Incidentally, I just found out that Dave is the piano player in Rear Window.

[Trials and Trippelations]

Evenutally the kid will get to ride around in this car I repainted

[TheZeitgeist]

Mine is a little over a year, and the Cozy Coupe is a big hit presently - wise investment.

[MJGreen - Docile Citizen]

Congratulations! Are you hoping for a boy or girl?

I only hope it's an anarchist.

[Trials and Trippelations]

I'd be happy with either sex, so far we plan to not find out the sex beforehand.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

You're just going to paint everything green and yellow?

[BiMonSciFiCon]

At least he or she will cheer for a good football team.

[Trials and Trippelations]

The Carolina Panthers!

[Irish ?s ESB]

Why don't you take your gender-normative hetero-patriarchal assumptions about gendered color schemes elsewhere, shitlord?

[Trials and Trippelations]

Kind of true due to economics. We accepted secondhand clothes of any color or bought whatever was cheap.

I did ask my wife to throw out the Red Sox stuff that was given to us though

[AceDroman]

Any and all things Bo Sox shall be burned.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

You can use the Sox stuff to clean up poop.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Congrats. Your life as you know it is over.

[Zeb]

And he seemed so young and full of life. So it goes.

[JW]

Kids: The Most Dangerous Parasite.

[Trials and Trippelations]

So true

[Brett L]

It's more like cocooning into a new life entirety unlike the old one.

[Tejicano]

Having no other experience the following might only apply to Japanese wives...

A buddy told me that after having kids it was as if his wife had been replaced with a woman cloned from his wife's genetic code. Looks exactly the same and acts very similar in many ways but it isn't the same person. My (Japanese) wife was the same way after having kids.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Congrats.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

Awwww. Congratulations!

I drove my first born cisgendered shitlord to college yesterday. He's a freshman. He has a beard.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

When I say he has a beard, I mean he has facial hair, not that he has a fake girlfriend. Just trying to be clear. I mention it only because, for an 18 year old, it is quite an amazingly thick example.

[jesse.in.mb]

...pics?

[Number.6]

18 and straight, Jesse. Behave.

[jesse.in.mb]

Hmph. You can't even appreciate a purportedly good beard in this place anymore.

It's like Berlin in '38 all over again.

[Irish ?s ESB]

I was literally just going to say "you'd better cool it on the discussion of your hairy son because otherwise he'll need the other kind of beard when Jesse gets through with him" but then I decided that jokes about you sexing up her son might be inappropriate, even by our standards.

Thankfully you went there and absolved me of any need to not be a creep.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

I....can't.....even.....

*runs out of room and slams door*

[Irish ?s ESB]

She like literally can't even with us you guys.

I'm sorry we forced you to enact that emotional labor.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

We're talking about my baby.

It was meant as an innocent observation - new parents, new babies, babies grow and end up at college with facial hair eventually (hopefully only the boys have facial hair). Time passes. *wipes away tear*

You all turned into something I just don't need to think about.

[Number.6]

Not so much "Hit-n-Run".

Morel like "Hit-on-and-Run"

[Irish ?s ESB]

You should know better than to talk about innocent subjects around us.

We are depraved monsters who kill all that is good and beautiful in the world. We will not rest until all the universe is just one vast Somalia.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

All that is innocent

[Trials and Trippelations]

Damn we lost another female libertarian

[Number.6]

.. break out another sock, lads!

[jesse.in.mb]

Male Gaze strikes again...I think.

[Whahappan?]

I believe that's Male Gayze in your case.

[grrizzly]

Awesome! Congratulations!

[Distilled Animal Spirits]

Congrats. Sleep returns, there is joy in midnight feedings (you have to look for it though).

Trust me, I've done this four times, and most of them lived.

[Brett L]

Congrats. The libertarian breeding project continues!

[DEG]

Congratulations!

[Warren's Strapon]

...and any marriage licenses her staff give out today are void.

Does she have the power to issue that ruling? She can refuse to give one, but once it's given, can she void it?

[Dan Bongard]

No. She's a paper-pusher; she has zero say in what is or isn't a valid marriage.

[Jerryskids]

She may just now be trying to wrap her head around the idea that it's not really her that issues the license, it's her office. The county attorney has said that licenses from her office are valid - her argument that not only does she not have to issue licenses for the gays but that nobody else can issue them either makes it pretty plain that she's no longer just affirming her right to her religious beliefs but insisting she has a right to impose those beliefs on others.

In other news of the gay, my niece tells me they sent a letter around her office today. Their insurance company for the last couple of years has extended 'same-sex domestic partner' benefits with their plan but today announced that, since the Supremes said gay marriage was okay, they are dropping that particular section and now they don't give a crap what sex your marriage partner is but you do gotta be married to claim your spouse on your insurance. Guess who's complaining about the injustice?

[jesse.in.mb]

A straight couple of my acquaintance had to move their wedding forward when CA started phasing out domestic partnerships after Prop 8 ended. They'd apparently been using options associated with it to get her on his insurance even though they didn't want to deal with the family hassle of getting married.

I'd had no idea it was possible.

They were not amused (but it was a fun, if expensive, wedding).

[CatoTheChipper]

So, they used to discriminate against unmarried heterosexual domestic partners, but no longer do so. The horror!

[l0b0t]

Here in NYC, the city employees' insurance covers domestic partnerships regardless of the couple's sex but with the advent of SSM, they tried to eliminate that. My significant other's union fought like hell and got that shit shut down (the only good thing the UFT has ever done). I get to stay on her (very nice) insurance and we do not have to schlep down to city-hall and pay an apparatchik bless our 15 year monogamous union.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Los Angeles is launching a task force on electronic dance music.

Looks like they're dubstepping up their efforts.

[Fist of Etiquette]

...redoubstepling their efforts? Maybe?

[Jerry on the sea]

Drum & Tase? Drum & Mace?

[Almanian Bridges, Not Walls]

Krunkin' the numbers, yo.

[Fist of Etiquette]

President Obama today met with King Salman of Saudi Arabia, who's still not on board with the Iran nuclear deal.

But no matter how silly the idea of having a king might be to us...

[Swiss Servator]

TAKE THAT, SALMAN!

/Gwen Ifil

[Aresen]

President Obama today met with King Salman of Saudi Arabia, who's still not on board with the Iran nuclear deal.

So Salman a la King?

[rts]

'No Californians' stickers being slapped on For Sale signs in Portland

Portlanders apparently upset with the direction of the local housing market are slapping "no Californians" stickers on For Sale signs in the city, real estate agents say.

I need some "no fat chicks" stickers.

[Crusty Juggler]

Portlandians are soooooooo cool. Additionally, they would like me to tell all of you that you are not cool, not even you cool kids.

[C. Anacreon]

It's funny because most Portland women are fat chicks.

[Crusty Juggler]

"Every time you point, I see a penis."

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

For where? The serve yourself yogurt palace?

[rts]

The commuter train I take could certainly use one or a dozen such stickers.

[Trials and Trippelations]

Yoga pants aisle

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

+2 cottage cheese legs

[commodious spittoon]

Oh, man. Portlandians vs. Californians. Couldn't happen to a nicer bunch.

[jesse.in.mb]

They hate us for our freedom (to pump our own gas).

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I don't think I could live in a place that won't allow me to pump my own gas.

It annoyed me to no end in NJ and that was only on three occasions!

[Root Boy]

Confused the hell out of me trying to fill up my rental car near PDX. Thought that shit was only an NJ abomination -- and I've been to OR plenty of times. Can't figure out how I didn't remember.

[Root Boy]

But at least Switch blades are legal.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Californians fucked up California. You don't want them doing the same to your place. Build a wall, I say.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Fence!

[Rufus J. Firefly]

This is where you reply loudly, 'WALL!'

And then I keep it going with, 'FENCE!'

People. You have to at least pretend to work with me.

[Swiss Servator]

TASTES GREAT!

LESS FILLING!

[Robert]

I was in the Felt Forum at Madison Sq. Garden when that cheer got going.

"Wall! Fence!" looks like what you yell to warn an outfielder. Or on some fields, "Tree!"

[Fist of Etiquette]

I'm not your guy, pal.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

You can't build a nation around people like Fist.

/lowers head. Flings dead mouse into garbage disposal.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Now who dropped the ball on a meme?

[jesse.in.mb]

Californians fucked up California.

Jeez, we took all the hippies off your hands in the '60s and '70s and this is the thanks we get?

[Warren's Strapon]

You weren't supposed to get them to take themselves seriously, then release them back into the wild.

[jesse.in.mb]

How were we supposed to know that sterilizing them would be found unconstitutional?

I mean, you can do it for stray cats, why not hippies?

[Ted S.]

Vermont got a lot of them, too. So did Woodstock.

[Brett L]

I'm sure the Fair Housing cops are good with this.

[Trials and Trippelations]

Can we get "No Massholes" for NH and "No New Yorkers" for NC?

[cavalier973]

"Yankees go home"

[brady949]

Oh no...now I can't move to their depressing little city full of hipsters and hobos.

[Dan Bongard]

Portland is upset because Californians are too right-wing for them.

[Troy muy grande boner]

President Obama today met with King Salman of Saudi Arabia

I wonder is Obama swallowed and brought his own towel.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Oh dear. I read that as 'I wonder if Obama swallowed..."

I need help.

[FreeOne Michael]

Still shilling for my stuff at FreeOne http://www.zazzle.com/freeonedesign There is a sale on too. Use the code ZENDOFSEASON when you check out for 25% off, now through Monday.

[rts]

Golden Ears tolls evaded with flip-up licence plate

Once the car was located, police staked it out, and one day last month they followed it across the bridge, once again allegedly observing the licence plate flip up into place after it passed the toll cameras.

The car was stopped and the driver was arrested. During a search of the car, police said a cable was found near the driver's seat that flipped the license plate, which was mounted on a hinge, up and down.

Gregory Murray, 49, of Port Coquitlam, was charged with two counts of fraud under $5000 and his 1993 Geo Metro was seized. Police are also applying to have the car forfeited to the Crown as offence-related property.

[Juvenile Bluster]

I'm impressed. A 1993 Geo Metro that's actually still running?

[Pan Zagloba]

That's awesome. I hope more people follow his lead, so we can add Coquitlam Man to the vocabulary that already has Surrey Girl.

[Ted S.]

Fuck asset forfeiture, even if it's just a 1993 Geo Metro that can't be worth any more than the value of the materials comprising it.

[jesse.in.mb]

his 1993 Geo Metro was seized

There's a man who has nothing left to lose.

[C. Anacreon]

Yes, as Janis Joplin used to sing,

"Geo Metro's just another term for nothing left to lose."

[Ted S.]

Oh Lord won't you buy me, a Geo Metro
I don't need a Porsche, I can't make amends....

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

1993 Geo Metro was seized...

Worth less than the actual tolls.

[Root Boy]

Goobermint is gonna get their money.

Like the red light camera guy in Long Island the hammer comes down hard.

[Aresen]

Well, at least our police have to get a court order to take the property.

TBS, fuck that guy. The tolls are there to pay for the damn bridge. If he doesn't want to use it, use the older bridges that are toll-free.

Incidentally, after the Coquihalla Highway was paid for in 2008, the BC government abolished the tolls and took out the toll booths.

[Robert]

So James Bond can afford martinis because of all the tolls he's skipping?

[Fist of Etiquette]

CNN has already sold all but one commercial slot for its scheduled September GOP debate despite significantly higher-than-average ad rates.

Hurry before people realize they're buying ad space on CNN.

[Medical Physics Guy]

Hillary Clinton is sorry her repeated lies have "been confusing to people."

Sounds just like Obama when he was selling ACA.

[MiloMinderbinder]

Doug Bandow says Trump is top among Republicans on foreign policy.

http://www.detroitnews.com/sto...../71648020/

[Steve G]

Dontcha actually, ya know, need one first??

[Dan Bongard]

In fairness, "no foreign policy at all" is preferable to some of the stuff I heard proposed in the last debate.

I'll take "I dunno" over "boots on the ground fighting ISIS" any day of the week.

[Cytotoxic]

Alright Cato we get it. It's a mistake to ever take you seriously on foreign affairs. Bandow even repeated the 'IraQ War created ISIS' BS.

[Jerry on the sea]

CNN has already sold all but one commercial slot for its scheduled September GOP debate despite significantly higher-than-average ad rates.

So how much is the kickback to Trump?

[Almanian Bridges, Not Walls]

You know it's 'UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE.

[Rich]

"At the end of the day, I am sorry that this has been confusing to people and has raised a lot of questions, but there are answers to all these questions. And I take responsibility"

This is *nowhere near* "the end of the day". And she has no idea what "take responsibility" means.

[Steve G]

She's using the cop version of 'take responsibility'

[Jerryskids]

She's also not being helpful by pointing out there are answers to all these questions - without mentioning that she knows all the answers but you wouldn't be able to pry them out of her with a redhot crowbar and a quart of sodium pentothal.

[Mike Laursen]

Funny, I haven't found anything Hillary Clinton confusing at all. Her words and actions are very clear.

[Crusty Juggler]

CNN has already sold all but one commercial slot for its scheduled September GOP debate despite significantly higher-than-average ad rates.

I hope The Donald shows whatever mouthy broad they have asking questions who's boss.

[Dan Bongard]

It would be funny if Trump bought up ad time during the debate and then filled it with more of himself talking.

I mean, personally I hate the guy -- but I have to admit that would be funny.

[Pan Zagloba]

As promised, today is the final entry in the Accomplished Female Athletes of Eastern and Central Europe series. We started on July 16, when Trumpocalypse began. Alas, the Trumpmania has proven stronger.
Our final entry is Tatiana Kosheleva. Member of the Russian indoor volleyball team, they won World Championship in 2010, Silver in 2009 and a European championship in 2013.
Posing with a volleyball.
Here you can see her posing with a sign promoting her team's 2010 World Championship win.
Labour Day, I may put up another entry with a list of Top Five or so, in my view.

[Swiss Servator]

PLZ. MOAR.

[Pan Zagloba]

I don't think it's possible to see MOAR Tatiana than that second pic.
Unless it's to get more athletes on? It's getting harder (yes, I said it) to find good examples, unless I lift restrictions on stereotypical sports - beach volleyball, figure skating, rhytmic gymnastics, synchronized swimming, tennis.

[Crusty Juggler]

Restrictions on the listed sports? Good God, man. LIFT THEM.

[Pan Zagloba]

But then it loses even a veneer of being about skill, and just degenerates into ogling gorgeous, athletic young women...

Oh. I see. Right.

[Crusty Juggler]

Don't make me spend my Labor Day weekend researching Eastern European tennis players, because I will do it, damnit.

[MJGreen - Docile Citizen]

Jesus. Going out with a bang, huh?

Capital knockers!

[AceDroman]

Good lord man

[DEG]

Mein Gott!

More!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

It's Hilary's turn.... to be sorry

[Almanian Bridges, Not Walls]

"It's my party and I'll run if I want to. Run if I want to. Run if I want to." - Papa Joe Biden

[Wasteland Wanderer]

So sorry.

[Almanian Bridges, Not Walls]

Home B4 PM Lynx! Three-day weekend. Yes!

Anyhoo. The US government still sucks ass. More at 11:00.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

Hear here! I'm stuck on a fucking airplane at Dulles because the ATC doesn't think the storm in Atlanta is going to move in the next 2 hours, I guess.

[C. Anacreon]

Does ATC stand for All-Terrain Cuckservatives?

[Rich]

the document review platform the [State] department uses can't ingest most forms of electronic data. Because of that, "most potentially responsive documents must first be printed and then scanned into the system, even if documents are received electronically."

*** facepalm ***

[Ted S.]

Gotta love government competence.

[Timon 19]

"the document review platform the [State] department uses can't ingest most forms of electronic data."

Sorry, that's either flat out bullshit, or the people performing this review are so mind-bogglingly stupid that they can't claw their way out of a wet paper bag. It COULD be a form of vendor lock-in (fucking Microsoft), but I find it hard to believe that printing documents, then scanning them back in and getting the OCR right is EASIER than finding software that will open whatever bullshit format they've got that stuff in.

[The Last American Hero]

Small tax prep CPA firms can afford software that is able to scan a W-2 (or 1099 and a whole host of other docs), identify it as such and shove a pdf of it in the right folder for the right client and plop the number on the tax return without any human involvement other than pushing the big green button on the copier. The notion that FedGov with it's massive budget has a review platform that shitty is unacceptable.

[Irish ?s ESB]

Girl with 20 twitter followers tweets offensive joke about dead cop, Breitbart publishes an article on girl no one has ever heard of and who does not matter, girl gets death threats, has conservative scumbags calling her school to try and get her kicked out.

Conservatives are totally opposed to people getting booted out of college for their political opinions though. Just ask them, they'll tell you all about it.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Conservatives are just as sickening on freedom of speech when it comes to cops.

[jesse.in.mb]

The Cultural Libertarian moment has arrived.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

From comments:

JDuggity
3 minutes ago

Obviously the death threats are horrible and no one deserves that kind of intimidation (including lion-killers, let me add), but really?a 26-year-old should have more discretion than to write such a crassly provocative comment in a public forum and not expect an intense reaction.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

As far as offensive jokes go --

"I can't believe so many people care about a dead cop and NO ONE has thought to ask what he did to deserve it. He had creepy perv eyes ?"

I think we can do a lot better than that.

[Irish ?s ESB]

I know. There are 10,000 people saying something worse on twitter at any given moment.

[Antilles]

The Progressive characteristics of victimhood and payback are beginning to infect every group. If this continues, it will not end well...

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

"beginning to"?!?!? I'd argue that the Federalists and Anti-Federalists played the same exact game.

It's all the drama triangle playing out

[Dan Bongard]

Hell, police practically invented the "progressive" victimhood-and-payback routine. "You don't know how hard this job is, how dare you criticize" is a refrain so old it probably had to be translated from the original Aramaic.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

Cain and Abel. Cain was a victim because God hated his lazy ass offerings, so he decided to bash his brother's skull in for retribution.

[Cytotoxic]

I've read that part of the Bible. Why were Cain's offerings 'lazy'?

[C. Anacreon]

Why were Cain's offerings 'lazy'?

All Cain did was put the gift straight from the store into one of those cheap 'gift bags.' He couldn't even trouble himself to wrap it, put on a nice ribbon and a signed card with a heartfelt note. The Creator finds that extremely lazy, and it raises His ire.

[Cytotoxic]

Proggies lead, conservatives follow.

[Troy muy grande boner]

To be fair, anyone that showed up on her lawn would has a good chance of getting eaten.

[Irish ?s ESB]

#fatlivesmatter

[brady949]

No they don't.

[Ted S.]

I wonder how many of New York magazine's readers will feel sympathy toward victims of left-wing shaming mob campaigns.

[Irish ?s ESB]

I had the same thought, but that's kind of the point. They're the same assholes, they just pretend otherwise when they're being self-righteous.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

26 year old english major? It's a shame. She was really going places. Especially with that clever tweet.

[Pan Zagloba]

Seriously, I can't imagine greater punishment for her than being herself. Death threats and idiotic comments are completely unnecessary in her case. Oh well, at least now she can become a suffering heroine to her SJW buddies.

[Irish ?s ESB]

She also had an outstanding warrant for assault and actually got picked up by the cops after her name ended up in the news.

So she's a real shithead, just not a shithead who deserved this.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

You know what really shocked me?

The word "husband" appeared in the article.

[Irish ?s ESB]

Dude, this chick had a husband.

And he's the most pussy-whipped beta since Adam was like "sure Eve, I'm a little bitch so let's eat that apple."

Read the guy's facebook post and you'll see the kind of men we're dealing with.

[The Last American Hero]

Adam wasn't a total beta, I mean he was gettin it on with Lilith on the side.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Sure. A closet case.

[MJGreen - Docile Citizen]

And the tweet is so tame.

Those making death threats are really helping the cause! How dare you suggest the cop could be anything but a saint? I'll kill you bitch!!

[Jerryskids]

Brandon Darby is a piece of shit.

[Cytotoxic]

And here we have the conservative online 'revolution' in a nutshell: emulate the tactics of their opponents. There's no revolution here, just emulation. It's so...conservative.

[*GILMORE*]

Heir To Jelly-Bean Fortune Crushes Man With His WWII Tank

[Rich]

The Rowland family said it was assisting officials in the investigation and was seeking to provide "intensive counseling" services to those who witnessed the event.

As well as "unlimited jelly beans".

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

A lifetime supply to the guy that he ran over?

[*GILMORE*]

The guy he ran over will be immortalized as a new flavor

[Rich]

Whatever the flavor, the bean's color will be a mixture of olive drab and crimson.

[Galactic Chipper Cdr Lytton]

Bacon cheese curds is the flavor.

[*GILMORE*]

"Tread Scrapings"

[C. Anacreon]

And they'll throw in this picture of Harry Potter made exclusively with Jelly Belly jellybeans.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

The new banana Jelly Bellies are no shit delicious. Best flavor yet.

[*GILMORE*]

Hillary Clinton = I Keep It Real, I Floss a Little Gold

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I'm not current on the cool kid lingo. Is that implying that she wears a gold thong?

[Trials and Trippelations]

That made me think before I clicked

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

It means the carpet does not match the drapes.

Not that anyone would ever want to know.

[Number.6]

... removes brain ... scrubs vigorously with "Barkeeper's Friend"

[*GILMORE*]

Russia to USA = Your State Department Says "No", But Your Body Cries "Yes"

[Rufus J. Firefly]

I was expecting....something else.

You let me down, Gilmore.

/nods dejectedly.

[Sudden]

I, too, was thinking sex tourism.

[jesse.in.mb]

I, too, was thinking sex tourism.

When are you not?

[Sudden]

I have opted to take a vow of abstinence for the month of September.

So not until October 3 when banging bridesmaids at my buddy's wedding in Solvang counts as sex tourism.

[jesse.in.mb]

Now you've got me reading Pravda.

"We do want to create an international coalition to counter terrorism and extremism, and we have consulted our American partners on the subject. I have personally talked to US President Obama about in on the phone. I have also discussed this with the president of Turkey and the leadership of Saudi Arabia," said Putin.

"If we combine efforts in these directions, then we will achieve positive results. If we act separately, if we argue about quasi-democratic principles and procedures in some territories, it will take us to a greater dead end," said the Russian leader.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Sounds about right.

[Pan Zagloba]

God, I'm getting flashbacks to 1991! Christ!

[woody the woodchipper]

http://www.thedailybeast.com/a.....arian.html\
Kanye west leader of the libertarian moment

[*GILMORE*]

Yeezytarianism is its own animal. Its sort of a mix of totalitarianism and Dada.

[*GILMORE*]

Biden's Mindless Bluster May Prove Effective Counter To Trump's Boorish Puffery

[*GILMORE*]

Stud Brags of His Sexual Conquests

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I bet he didn't even eat ass.

[*GILMORE*]

Men in Khakis Depress Gilmore

[Crusty Juggler]

those guys are big fans of the Civil War general, I guess.

[jesse.in.mb]

Worst rugby scrum. EVER.

[Robert]

I could actually see that?heads right rather than left, with that darker-skinned guy getting ready to put in the "ball" of the exclamation point. The guy w his right hand down is indicating where he wants it. It's the Bush 2-a-side tournament.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Are you getting paid by Reuters? I'm not watching any more Microsoft Cloud commercials.

[*GILMORE*]

Nah, i just have a reuters newsfeed widget on me iGoogle page.

[jesse.in.mb]

How do you still have an iGoogle page? I thought they shuttered that project a few years ago. My mom was bizarrely attached to hers and they kept saying it wouldn't be available anymore.

[*GILMORE*]

good catch - these guys moved in to replace it for people who liked that thing (like me)

http://www.ighome.com/

[*GILMORE*]

Doesn't Chrome have basically the same capability built in? Which is why i thought they phased it out as a "cross browser" feature - to encourage people to use Chrome exclusively.

[jesse.in.mb]

Kind of, both Firefox and Chrome have changed their about:blank new tabs to a list of recently viewed/most frequently viewed sites.

It's generally embarrassing and I hate it.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

I can't imagine how much plaid and facial hair would be on that page.

Also related, are we talking long beards or well trimmed beards?

[jesse.in.mb]

I have a preference for well trimmed beards. Some people who can grow a full beard can pull off the long beard, but it's hard to go wrong with a well-groomed one.

[lafe.long]

Kind of, both Firefox and Chrome have changed their about:blank new tabs to a list of recently viewed/most frequently viewed sites.

It's generally embarrassing and I hate it.

hmm.. In my FF, I can set the new tab page to be blank... for chrome, there's an extension for a blank new tab page.

[*GILMORE*]

also, "NoScript" bro.

It can be a little annoying having to 'approve' elements of any new sites you visit, but its a convenient way to strip the annoying stuff out of the ones you visit regularly

[Rhywun]

Or AdBlock - it's much easier because it's already configured.

[lafe.long]

11 year old shoots 16 year old home invader

A child shot a teen that was trying to break into a home in north St. Louis County. Police say the 11-year-old shooter fired one round from a handgun and killed the 16-year-old suspect.

[Zeb]

Nice.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

USA!!!! USA!!!! USA!!!!

[MJGreen - Docile Citizen]

Good shoot. smooches

[*GILMORE*]

Actually 2 of the neighbors were interviewed, and one suggested the older kid was going door-to-door trying to "sell his phone", and the other said that there was no "break in"...

http://www.reuters.com/article.....VT20150904

[Zeb]

Hmm. Maybe I got too excited there.

[jmomls]

Yeah, right. Teenagers often wander the streets at 1130 at night "trying to sell their phones".

Also, such neighborhoods would never eeeeeever lie to the cops or investigators about a shooting involving one of their homeboys. Nope. Never.

[*GILMORE*]

" the break-in and shooting occurred around 2:20 p.m. Thursday (3:30 p.m. ET)...

...The St. Louis Post-Dispatch quoted Donna Jackson, 45, who lives across the street from the house where the shooting occurred, as saying she saw the 11-year-old boy shoot the teenager in the head as the two were talking near the home's front door. "It was not a break-in," she told the paper."

Yeah! Who needs "Evidence" and "Facts" when we can just jump to conclusions!

[Trials and Trippelations]

Police remain puzzled by the fact the shooter hit the target with only one round.

[jesse.in.mb]

JESUS H. CHRIST, The Food Babe's insanity has caused Starbucks to change its formula for Pumpkin Spiced Lattes.

Starbucks is adding real pumpkin to the lattes. That's right ? real, actual pumpkin pur?e will be added to the lattes, and caramel coloring will be removed. (Don't quote us on this, but we're pretty sure this is the first time squash has ever been served in a coffee beverage.)

(I don't drink Pumpkin Spiced Lattes, but I really dislike The Food Babe gaining any traction with her crazy...

[*GILMORE*]

"Possible pesticide residue from non-organic coffee beans"

They roast coffee beans, you ignorant cunt

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Did you know that she exposed the latte as being non-vegan???? That's some cutting edge shit right there.

[jesse.in.mb]

Reading her "information" on caramel coloring reminded me of Jew Coke and how I don't have any.

[Limpee Wiltstock]

It's bizarre that folks are able to discriminate between a molecule engendered by the biologic activities of plants from one that is manufactured out of other molecules of whatever source by intentional agencies. I've had people depreciate that "synthetic" methylsalicylate produced by distilling aspirin in methanol as somehow indescribably inferior to the "natural" sort made by distilling birch oil and extraction.

[Zeb]

And the beans are inside pulpy fruits that have to be removed and never get pesticide on them in the first place.

[Limpee Wiltstock]

We always used to spray a bit of insecticide--fungicide blend (just a bit!) on our coffee beans after hulling them. We always did a lot of basting too...

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

As long is the FDA is involved in mayonnaise labeling, I request that they look into the "babe" part of her label. Blatant fraud.

[*GILMORE*]

BUT TEH VEGGIES CURED HER UGLY?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

But look what they did to her brain.

[Irish ?s ESB]

Would though.

[Irish ?s ESB]

Also, this food babe meme is brilliant.

[*GILMORE*]

It amazes me that no one has changed the "THERES STUFF IN FOOD TRYING TO KILL YOU BUT I HAVE FOUND THE MAGIC WAY TO AVOID AGE AND DEATH AND DISEASE THROUGH PARANOIA!!"-diet-fad-sales-pitch one iota in the last 30 years, and motherfuckers still flock to it like its the newest latest Brand New discovery.

When I used to do lots of food-industry research, we often picked up interesting data on how people are completely irrational and quasi-religious about stuff they put in their mouths ...or (some women - black and asians in particular) stuff they put on their skin

I think its a primitive belief that "food is magic"

[Root Boy]

Come on Gilmore, haven't you heard the saying "you are what you eat" it's science.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

I think its a primitive belief that "food anything I don't understand is magic"

FIFY. See also: climate change, economics, patriarchy (and other social justice conspiracies ), etc.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

What's amazing to me is how the fads change and morph over time with no acknowledgement of past craziness.

[jesse.in.mb]

"Wheat intolerance" has gone like the plague through my family.

I keep baking bread and it keeps getting devoured to family events though.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

I keep baking bread and it keeps getting devoured to family events though.

Nothing beats fresh bread. Yummy.

I eat very few carbs, though. That's my personal food craziness.

No carbs = me skinny

I'm just vain. It has nothing to do with gluten free nonsense.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

Nobody better ask me for pics.

I've had it with you people.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

SOMETHINGS ARE SACRED!

[Crusty Juggler]

Nobody better ask me for pics.

Someone is awfully full of themselves.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

Someone is awfully full of themselves.

So, you're saying you wouldn't want pics?

*narrows gaze*

I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU PEOPLE NOW?

*runs out of room and slams door*

[Crusty Juggler]

I mean, you are so pic request worthy that you have become unattainable.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I got tired of asking. If you're offering...

[jesse.in.mb]

I don't eat a ton of carbs either. I'll bake a loaf of bread and have maybe one slice of it. I bring the rest to work to make my coworkers fat and less likely to take out the shit going on in their personal lives on me.

The latest loaf I used some of the whey from the yogurt I've been making to replace some of the water and brushed a ton of butter on the outside so the crust got all buttery and golden.

[Crusty Juggler]

The latest loaf I used some of the whey from the yogurt I've been making to replace some of the water and brushed a ton of butter on the outside so the crust got all buttery and golden.

I need to become Jesse's friend or co-worker or something.

[Sudden]

Tell you what, you can be Sudden's bet debt fulfiller. Trust me, you will get all the loaf you can handle.

[Crusty Juggler]

Done!

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

NON TRANSFERABLE

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

I have a bag of banana Jelly Bellies in my pocket right now.

With a backup of pomegranate Jelly Bellies in my other pocket.

Are those considered carbs?

[grrizzly]

Good for you. Lately I only drink carbs.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Thanks for the reminder. My local gas station carries Lagunitas now.

[Cytotoxic]

I'm trying to reduce the amount of bread I eat. I do not think it is bad for me I just don't think it's that good.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

It's a correlary of the MUH FEELZ principle. When you spend your entire life in lizard brain mode, you fall in the same trap every time. People are really good at rationalizing their cognitive errors away.

[*GILMORE*]

"'anything I don't understand is magic"""

Yes, but "food" has a kind of permanent rationality-resisting aspect which is completely unique

the Mrs correctly notes = "the fads change and morph over time with no acknowledgement of past craziness."

See: Libertymike's recent insane insistence that 'some science suggests' GMO are like nuclear-corporate-poison that causes brains to melt

as though some minor variation in DNA between one tomato and another will turn it into a Man-Killing super-species.... rather than just a tomato with microscopically thicker skin, more resistant to blight, etc.

And never mind that millions of people have eaten the stuff for decades. Within it lurks the Demon Gene which seeks to destroy all mankind.

People will believe *anything* about food. They imbue it with supernatural powers.

[Trials and Trippelations]

'some science suggests' GMO are like nuclear-corporate-poison that causes brains to melt

But I was told in my nursing class today that GMO foods are bad because we don't reaaaallllly know if they are safe (but they probably aren't).

[Crusty Juggler]

that GMO foods are bad because we don't reaaaallllly know if they are safe (but they probably aren't

This is the same argument against vaping, and it is absurd.

[*GILMORE*]

"I was told in my nursing class today that GMO foods are bad because we don't reaaaallllly know if they are safe "

Yeah, this is like the mega-fallacy that can never be refuted = the combination of 'appeal to ignorance'...

(what we *don't know* is always infinitely more important than what we *do*)

... and the "fallacy of the Perfect"/Nirvana Fallacy... which is fundamentally 'anti-science' because science itself is not *positively affirmative*, but rather a means to simply gather evidence through repeat refutation of alternatives.

Never mind the "evidence" of hundreds of millions of people consuming GMO for decades....

Yet these same people think its perfectly reasonable to feed people anti-biotics like candy.

[Trials and Trippelations]

When you spend your entire life in lizard brain mode

What are you trying to say about our beloved commenter Mr Lizard?

[Limpee Wiltstock]

'I think its a primitive belief that "food is magic"'

I must take exception characterising it as "primitive belief". I mean, maybe it is, but at the same time, it's an inevitable fact. Food is magic.

Then there's the weirdness folks have about this or that food "causing cancer" or "preventing cancer". It's treated like cancer is a unitary disease that originates from a single clear initialising event. Which seems totally nuts. Certainly everybody knows lots of folks with cancer. Surely they can see plain as day it's nigh a totally different disease in every case, and surely they can see the obvious link between getting old and dying of cancer. I occasionally have to explain that this or that substance may promote cancers of a certain type, but that at the same time it inhibits another category of cancers. Most folks it's like it blows their minds and there's no grasping it. Or that just about everything is carcinogenic in some way or other.

[Irish ?s ESB]

Toxic dose of sugar

Oh, that is funny.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

My social media is littered with #backTheBlue bullshit. My faith in humanity is waning.

[Trials and Trippelations]

I lost my faith today. At least my fellow nurses all seem to be on the national healthcare boat.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

First, congrats on the child!

Second, that's just depressing. Those same nurses are going to be fucked if nationalized Healthcare were implemented.

[Mrs. Lemuel Struthers]

It amazes me that nurses or doctors could think national health care would be a good idea. Visit a couple UK hospitals and view the working conditions. Ughh. American hospitals (most of them) are cleaner, better staffed, better supplied, and the staff seems more professional.

I used the NHS on two occasions in the early '90s. Shudder.

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

It's the young and brainwashed. Most doctors I know are VERY against it.

[Trials and Trippelations]

It is more of a nursing thing.

[C. Anacreon]

Yup, it tends to be a nursing thing, especially unionized nurses. You can find the occasional doc supporting it, but those tend to be the gauze and Birkenstock wearing, bald with grey ponytail, hardcore Berkeley free-clinic type docs who only work two afternoons a week.

[jmomls]

yeah, you should totally back the thugs instead, bruh.

[Cytotoxic]

MUH BLUE THUGS GUD

UR BLAK THUGS BAD

[Sudden]

Thugs are bad.....mmmmmmmk?

Whether they wear badges or hoodies.

[Trshmnstr doesn't recycle]

yeah, you should totally back the thugs instead, bruh.

Cool false dichotomy you've got there, bud.

[Limpee Wiltstock]

At my mother's trial, I recall at one point her arsking the jury, "Why should you have to obey a bunch of thugs?"

She was talking about LE.

[Jessy08]

To be fair, anyone that showed up on her lawn would has a good chance of getting eaten.