President Obama credited politicians with inventing college—an ahistorical remark that nevertheless explains why college is so worthless.
- The death of Saudi King Abdullah has made Queen Elizabeth the world's oldest monarch.
- Tom Brady denied any wrongdoing in the Deflategate scandal as Twitter erupted into juvenile humor.
- ISIS video shows clock counting down to zero—at which time the terrorist group has vowed to execute two Japanese hostages.
- A 67-year-old woman claims the NYPD arrested her for informing on drug dealers in her apartment complex too frequently. The woman called the police, or a drug hotline, 40 times in 15 months. Eventually, police came to her apartment and arrested her.
- A speedrunner just set a new world record for beating Super Mario World. The play-through, which exploits a glitch, only takes 5 minutes and is nothing short of incredible.