Mitch McConnell

Obama Wants to Have Some Kentucky Bourbon With Mitch McConnell

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At a lengthy, sprawling press conference this afternoon following significant Democratic losses in yesterday's midterm, President Obama said something that probably won't surprise anyone: He could use a drink. 

Specifically, Obama said he would "enjoy having some Kentucky bourbon, ah, with Mitch McConnell."

He continued

I don't know what his preferred drink is, but you know, my interactions with Mitch McConnell, he—you know, he has always been very straightforward with me.

To his credit, he has never made a promise that he couldn't deliver. And you know, he knows the legislative process well. He obviously knows his caucus well. You know, he's always given me, I think, realistic assessments of what he can get through his caucus and what he can't. And so, I think we can have a productive relationship.

If McConnell (who is apparently a Manhattan fan) and Obama do share a bottle of Kentucky's finest, here's what they ought to drink

Filibuster Bourbon

I've got a bottle in my liquor cabinet right now, and I can vouch for its tastiness. 

Obama was not always so keen on grabbing a drink with the Kentucky Republican: 

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  1. He should have a tall glass of “shut the fuck up” man does he suck at speaking.

    1. I’ve never seen such a supposedly gifted orator and all around genius have so many verbal pauses and constantly struggle to find his words. Although I guess struggling to find words that are on the teleprompter right in front of you could be construed as some type of talent.

    2. Obama is too much of a pussy to drink whiskey – he is lucky if he can handle a beer

  2. A whiskey summit! Things are getting better already!

    1. The man’s favorite beer is red stripe I don’t know if I want to imagine his choice of whiskey.

      1. Ugh. Red Stripe? Where did you read that? I saw that Henry Gates drank it when they had the beer summit early in his presidency, but it said Obama drank Bud Light. That is actually worse though. Hard to do

        Good/decent beer isn’t very expensive where I live, so I am always puzzled when someone gets a 12-pack of say Corona or Red Stripe when I know you can get Mirror Pond Pale Ale or Sierra Nevada Torpedo for around the same price.

        1. I drink cheap beer like Bud Light super cold with tomato or clamato juice and some worcester sauce…it’s friggin’ awesome.

          1. Beer cocktails can be quite good if made well, but you’re not really drinking the beer for its own flavor if you do that.

          2. I love beer cocktails like that, chelada or red eye or whatever you call it. I recently made some home made Clamato (the regular stuff is kind of gross and fake) which was great with some inexpensive pils.

            1. I call it Satan’s Tears, because it tastes like salty evil.

        2. Maybe that’s who I was thinking of. Somebody had it at the beer summit, I thought it was Obama but I am so often wrong.

        3. I’ve got a torpedo in my hand (the other hand) right now.

          1. (That’s what she said.)

          2. Not the best IPA out there, but it is a pretty good value. Definitely above average.

            Hard to beat the west coast when it comes to beer and wine.

      2. The man’s favorite beer is red stripe

        LOL WUT

        1. Fuck me up the ass jet

    2. what we need is a whiskey rebellion.

  3. Hmph. I was hoping to see some fine bourbon suggestions in this thread. Disappointing.

    But I’ll put forth one: Corner Creek.

    1. Very good. Excellent bang for the buck.

      1. Maker’s Mark is my favorite, but Evan Williams black is really good for the price.

        1. Have you tried Maker’s Mark 46 yet?

          1. Not yet, dammit.

          2. It’s good.
            Not going to be my o-to like Maker’s Mark is now, but still solid.
            It’s similar enough to feel and taste familiar (read: like MM) but different enough that it definitely it’s own beverage.

            Right now, I have Woodford Reserve, Maker’s Mark and a bottle of Blanton’s ready to go.

          3. I’ve had 46. Loved it.

        2. I am a big Woodford Reserve guy. If you ever wanna spend 100$ Whistle Pig is fantastic.

          1. At least where I buy it, Woodford is pretty much the perfect price/quality compromise point for me.

        3. I’ve never been as impressed with Makers Mark as many people seem to be.

          I love Woodford Reserve. And Bulleit if you want something rye-heavy.

    2. Bulleit

      1. +1 for Bulliet and Bulleit Rye.

    3. OK, finally broke down and registered, just for this.
      Currently in my bar…

      Noah’s Mill
      Booker’s
      and on a budget day, I’ve got Knob Creek.

      1. Noah’s Mill. Very good.

        Make mine Old Pogue.

        And, welcome to the cesspool. One of the regulars will be around to horrify you shortly.

        1. Thanks – I think I’ve lurked long enough to avoid being horrified, but I suspect there are a few of the regs that just might surprise me yet.

        2. Make mine Old Pogue.

          Christ, is their site as difficult and strange as thee?

          1. The website has been updated. Let me know what you think.

            1. It’s about as updated and fucked up as you. Though, it has that astrolabe deep south spirituality. Kind of like a big what the fuck the bro is drinking from this fountain and it genuinely fucked up but in a truly good way kind of fucked up.

              Difficult and strange isn’t necessarily a f ail. It might even be something I should seek and imbibe upon like a ravenous werewolf caterpillar.

              1. Huh. I didn’t know I posted enough to garner a reputation for being strange — about 3X a week.

                1. Post more. … you pull Reasonorgasmoids.

                2. Forget B.P., it’s Cyborgtown. Dude’s fucking blitzed off his rocker.

    4. Woodford Reserve.

      Or, if you’re feeling flush, the George T. Stag.

      1. Thumbs up for the Stagg, as well as its companion rye, Thomas Handy.

    5. Do you sip bourbon or drink bourbon? Willing to bet most of you fine types don’t finish off great bottles of liquid mojo.

    6. ctrl+f Knob Creek
      no results found

      I am disappointed in you, reason commenters.

      Although since I live in the Glorious Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, my choices are limited by our benevolent Liquor Control Board. Than you for limiting my choices, oh great beverage overlords!

  4. McConnell (who is apparently a Manhattan fan)

    Well, I guess even McConnell has some redeeming qualities.

    1. Meh. Waste of perfectly good whiskey.

      1. Oh, there we go. You get fucked up with great minds.

        You might have met the mind at an intergalactic sex convention for hippy mars whores… but, there will always be interesting smiles at the CHMW and you want to drink with a great smile..

        A great smile equals a train into the brain.

    2. Someone once tried to talk me into ordering a Manhattan in a bar, but it was too expensive for me. So I had a Bronx instead.

  5. Please, God, no. No rapprochement. Bourbon, sure, but not together.

    1. Bipartisanship! Reaching across the aisle! Working together!

      In other words, coming together to fuck the rest of us.

      1. Yes, this is precisely what I don’t want. Time for a new Senate Majority Leader. Who is the biggest Obama-hating asshole? Are there any racist Republican senators?

    2. For a second I thought you meant no rapprochement between bourbon and vermouth, and I was like “I disagree with you sir but I defend your right to say it”.

      1. I can’t talk, as I sometimes have my bourbon with a Coca-Cola product.

        1. You can’t talk? How about drinking where you can’t type sweet neighborhood clump of banality?

  6. Dan, get the fucking peaches

    1. And some cinnamon?

  7. Why would anyone want to waste perfectly good bourbon on these two fuckstains?

  8. If they both drowned in a barrel of cheap bourbon I’d recommend the date as a new national holiday!

    1. I am not referring to my favorite tipple as “Obama’s blood”.

      1. HOw ‘ bout Obama’s nipple, dear scribe?

        1. How about nothing related to Obama.

          That works too.

          1. Obama would drink a Mulatto Creole on whiskey ice, broseph.

  9. Weird. Almost every drinker from the predictable progressive to the conservative right on up to the rascally Libertarian would probably enjoy drinking booze with Obama over most of the presidents and so-called powerful nimrods of the senate and congress of the the last century…

    He leads with a lovely smile… Nothing more.

    1. Nope. Just off the top of my head, I’d take George H.W. over Obama.

      1. “It’s either Jim Beam or me” said Laura.

        Fail.

      2. Henry Kissinger. Total scum bucket, but I find his voice strangely fascinating.

        1. We have all seen too many body bags and ball sacs.

    2. I’d even rather drink with W than Obama. W might be chill and even get up to some buffoonery.

      What am I supposed to talk to Obama about, Star Trek? It wouldn’t even rank in the top five Star Trek conversations in my life.

      1. “It’s either Jim Beam or me” said Laura.

        I got the wrong fucking Bush above.

    3. I don’t know why people have this view of Obama. I frankly see him as far less of a guy I’d like to drink with than any president since, I dunno, maybe Carter? Except I would like to get him drunk and ask about aliens.

      Bush the Younger is a partier, as is Clinton, so they would be entertaining.

      1. I’m guessing eating steak, sipping bourbon, and watching football with Condoleezza would be more like a real men’s night out then with most of the recent president’s or vice presidents.

      2. I can’t imagine that any of these megalomaniacs would be fun to have a few drinks with. They’re all narcissistic power-seeking scum. They wouldn’t be fun, they’d probably just talk about themselves nonstop.

        1. Eh, I dunno. I wouldn’t mind keeping cool with Coolidge.

          1. Personally I’d much prefer to have a drink with Alison Brie. Politicians can go to hell.

            1. Clinton could arrange that. He’s a whore.

              1. Nothing wrong with whore… What sucks is Clinton’s disgusting breaking of establishment rules to serve his slimy cock while his government busted others who enjoyed the sex worker and paid them, at least, well.

                1. We’re talking about drinking with someone, not whether they’re total scum. Of course they’re that.

                  I worked as a fellow with the Clinton administration and heard some stories. I don’t know why, but Clinton makes me think of Stripes: “Lee Harvey, you are a madman. When you stole that cow, and your friend tried to make it with the cow. I want to party with you, cowboy. If the two of us together, forget it.”

                  1. SO you drink with the bird clump called Pro Libertate… HOW is this a fucking goddamn rejoice party? You read like a dentist fucking hammering out a tooth…

                    1. Because I’m not rejoicing? At best, I’m glad the Democrats got the hammer–again–but I’m still in a state of horror over the future. It’s not getting better without radical reform. And I mean the real thing, not that temporary don’t-really-mean-it crap we got in 1994.

                    2. I’m pretty sure he/it is drunk, ProL. You might want to just ignore the rambling. It’s not the first time he/it has gotten like this.

        2. I would want to drink with Rutherford Hayes, just to piss Lucy off.

      3. Carter? Christ, your tie is awful…

        1. I don’t see drinking with him, even if he drinks, which he may not.

    4. You need to check your system for malware. There’s plenty I’d rather drink with than Obama. Being drinking buddies with TR would probably get me at least one free safari. Coolidge would shut the fuck up and let me enjoy the bourbon. FDR would be hilarious once he got drunk and fell out of his wheel chair. IKE could tell me some pretty cool war stories. And I’m pretty sure drinking with either Kennedy or Clinton would get me laid at least once.

    5. Slick Willy would be so much better.

    6. Last century? I’d choose Kennedy. Because he might be able to get me laid and, well, he’s a Kennedy. That family knows how to get fucked up.

      1. *Last century? I’d choose Kennedy*

        After the second drink, JFK would break out a stash of narcotics that would make Hunter S. Thompson weep with envy.

  10. I look forward to the photos of McConnell doing the walk of shame out of the White House the next morning. Necktie stuffed in his pocket, carrying his shoes past the Secret Service shed at the front gate. His hair all frayed out and slightly crusty as he walks up Pennsylvania toward the Capitol. Wanting desperately to rest but still too tender to sit.

    1. Please don’t give SF any ideas.

    2. You should do him a favor, Hugh, and send him one of those hemorrhoid doughnut-shaped cushions.

    3. Did McConnell’s ass get penetrated with a presidential beer bong?

        1. Why?

          1. I kiss vulgar. My dick loves stroking the cheeks of vulgar…

  11. With Michelle Obama scowling over the table?

  12. If I were McConnell, I’d have Obo take a taste out of the bottle first. And I wouldn’t leave my cash on the bar when I went to take a leak.
    Suffice to say, I do not trust the guy.

    1. Okay, but what about McConnell inspires confidence and trust?

      1. Nothing whatsoever? I mean, at best, maybe some slight influence has drifted over from Paul over the last year, but did any of it stick? Probably not. He got his, right?

      2. I make no comment.

  13. Sure. The guy Obama described as a terrorist a scarce three years ago seems like a very reasonable person to him all the sudden. Wonder what happened.

    1. Okay, I’m waiting for the grand transformation to be implemented by republican party politicians.

      Remember, the republican party has been red from the start. Don’t expect anything different this time around.

  14. Go easy on the Filibuster, Peter– the word originally referred to antebellum Southern gentlemen like William Walker ( no relation to the distiller) who were given to staging Do it Yourself invasions of Mexico and the Spanish Main with a view to becoming banana republic dictators and spreading the Good News of slavery

  15. I haven’t had Filibuster bourbon, but their rye is pretty damn good.

  16. Manhattans are made with rye or sometimes canadian whiskey. Personally, I cry everytime someone wastes good rye on a Manhattan. Perhaps use Jim Beam rye if you have to do this.

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