Pentagon Picks a Name for Its Latest War—the Same One It Already Rejected
Earlier this month, The Wall Street Journal reported that senior defense officials were struggling with how to resolve an ongoing issue related to the ongoing strikes in Iraq and Syria: the operation didn't have a name. As a result, all the PowerPoint presentation decks—and if you know much of anything about the military, you know how seriously it takes its PowerPoint presentations—were referring to it with the blandly descriptive phrase, "Operations in Iraq and Syria." What's a war without an impressive, inspiring name?

After weeks of brainstorming, military officials came up with a name they thought could work: Operation Inherent Resolve. It was…very…very…well, okay, it wasn't that good.
And so, according to the Journal, the name was firmly rejected. From the WSJ's October 3 report:
To some military officers, Inherent Resolve didn't properly evoke the Middle East. Others faulted it for failing to highlight the international coalition the U.S. had assembled. Still others simply found it uninspiring…. Other officials said had the name been better received it might well be the new war's moniker.
"It is just kind of bleh," said a military officer.
Senior military aides reportedly requested a new name, perhaps something that would better capture the grandeur and importance and contradiction of a series of "limited" strikes that somehow became a multiyear military operation led by a president who campaigned on ending the war in Iraq. (This last bit isn't strictly true.)
Now, two weeks later, the Pentagon has finally settled on a, ah, rather familiar moniker: Operation Inherent Resolve.
From The Wall Street Journal's update this afternoon:
Despite the initial reaction at the Pentagon, military officials said that Central Command pressed to adopt Operation Inherent Resolve as the moniker. Additionally, some officials thought that a mundane name also would be a safe choice, unlikely to offend any member of the international coalition the U.S. has assembled to strike extremist targets.
Still, some defense officials said privately Wednesday that the Pentagon and Central Command may have missed an opportunity to find a name that would better capture the imagination of the public, and potentially build support or explain the military operation.
Maybe "Operation: Let's All Pretend It's Not *Really* A War" was a little too on the nose?
Come up with a better name? Share it in the comments section below.
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Operation Incoherent Resolve
Operation Politics First
Operation "Don't piss too many people off before November"
Operation Incoherent Appalled.
Operation Cannot Possibly Fail Operation Cannot Possibly Fail a Second Time
Great reference!
"We've learned a lot today. Namely that the Iraqi Army doesn't have balls."
Operation It's Different When We Do It
Operation "its Legal When The President Does It".
where nothing can possi-bly go wrong!
Operation Incoherent Response.
Operation Here We Go Again
Operation It Will Totally Work This Time
Operation F___ it, Let's Blow Something Up
Operation My Dick Is Bigger
Operation What Could Possibly Go Wrong
Operation Prosthetic Penis
Operation FYTW
Damn. Beat me to it.
Operation Bloviate Adjudicate Mislead Abdicate
Operation Bloviate And Mislead Always.
It's gonna get real confusing if you insist on using the Administration motto as a name for a military operation.
Operation Feel the Awesome Strength and Power of My Nobel Peace Prize
Operation - Defeat ISIS Now
Operation - Destroy Islamist Nutjobs
Operation - Defend Iraqi Natives
Operation - Doesn't Involve Nfantry
Operation Derp
Operation We've Always Been At War With Eastasia
Operation money pit
Operation find the moderates
Operation endeavor to persevere
Operation Fawn Liebowitz.
Operation Butterflies in Stomach
Operation Third Time Lucky
Operation: What Difference, At This Point, Does It Make?
O peration
O fficial
P re-war
S trikes
Operation Our Policy Sucks.
Operation Fuck You That's Why
Operation If You Like Your American Air Strikes You Can Keep Them
The Secrets of ISIS: The Complete Series
Operation Danger Zone?
Operation
I don't remember "brain freeze" being on my game from the 70's!
The War on US Taxpayers?
We should be so lucky.
Let's see, Frequent Wind's been taken, but how about Aleryah Alemtekrer?
Operation Breaking Wind?
Operation Someone Gets Paid with Your Money to Come Up with These Names.
Operation Futility
Operation Why Bother Naming It Until Next Time
Operation Inherit Levant
Operation Yeah! Victory Everywhere for Years!
Operation Manifest Destiny
What? Already taken?
I say we move away from tough-guy names and use the British method
Operation Mincemeat
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Mincemeat
There's a good book on that.
And a good movie.
What's wrong with Operation Blue Spoon?
Operation Mission Accomplished
Operation Leave Them Bleeding in the Sand
(in a culturally-sensitive way)
Operation Totally Not Like Bush At All Not Even A Little
Operation Orwell
Operation: I hope we can afford this
Operation: Still flying 10,000 miles to smoke a camel
Operation: Isn't this what drones were supposed to be for?
Operation Crimson Tide. That's my submission.
Operation I totally have no idea what the fuck I'm doing.
Special thanks to John Kerry for that one.
Operation America:Fuck Yeah
Operation Things We Do Together
Operation What Do We Have This Military For If We're Not Going To Use It
Operation: This page intentionally left blank.
Operation TAWP
Operation Arm Opponents Of Next War
Operation Smoperation
Operation Whose Side Are We On Again?
Operation 'Murica
We could just throw in random Culture ship names for operations:
Operation:
Injury Time
Falling Outside the Usual Moral Constraints
i said, i've got a big stick.
Well I Was In The Neighbourhood
You'll Thank Me Later
Credibility Problem
It's weird how many of his ships' names fit.
Operation Infinite Budget
Operation Boots in the Air
Operation Here we Go Again Crusade
Fall Is Here (going German to break the 'Op' monotony).
Operation PowerPoint
Operation What Difference At This Point Does It Make?
Operation Monroe: Mideast Edition
OT: Journalist recalls being hastily converted to Islam
Commander Pigeon
How about 'Operation Endeavour to Persevere'?
Operation Sisyphus
Operation Totally Serious.
Operation Neverending Story
Operation: This Time It's Not For Oil, This Time It's For Blood
Operation: Fuck the Drones
Operation: This Time We're Really Going To Kick Their Ass Once And For All, I swear
These deliberations cost the Pentagon $32 million.
Operation Without a Cool Acronym (OWACA)
Time from nominations.
I liked:
'Operation Sisyphus' (Derptologist)
and
'Operation Infinite Budget' (Hillary's Clitdong)
"To some military officers, Inherent Resolve didn't properly evoke the Middle East. "
But that's the whole point of Newspeak - to evoke nothing concrete. See "Affirmative Action" for details.
Operation Third Of Seventy-Two.
I pine for the days when the Pentagon had an 'Operations Branding Team' that had a clear sense of style and focus: part-Scandinavian Death Metal, part-Gary Gygax (which is sorta redundant), and all GI JOE-badass... which brought us a string of greatest hits like
"Operation Acid Gambit"
or
"Operation Gothic Serpent"
or
"Operation Viking Hammer"
....whereas Team Obama apparently wants "War" to feel about as Metal as daytime programming on the Oxygen Network. Are we going to bomb some shit or are we planning a baby shower? Has ISIS left you with a 'not so fresh' feeling? Try Infinite Resolve: now with *Aloe*
"Operation Arabian Nightmare"
Operation Because We Want To
Operation Why The Hell Not
Operation Explosions and Murder
Operation We Don't Care What You Think
Operation shockingly awful.
Operation Depends What Your Definition of Is-Is
Operation Third time is the charm!
Operation Save The Legacy.
The reason why a name won't come to them is because there is no purpose or aim or sense of why they are doing it. And, no plan now that it has started.
If they wanted to save the children, it would be called Operation Daycare, or something.
They don't know why they're there. How do you name a purposeless project?
Operation That Second Nobel Peace Prize Ain't Gonna Happen Without a Bigger Body Count