ISIS Claims Kobani as Obama Admin Contradicts Itself, Climate Change vs. U.S. Military, Wendy Davis Defends Wheelchair Ad: P.M. Links

|

Large image on homepages
(cc)
  • Screencap

    ISIS has reportedly captured the strategic town of Kobani along the Syria-Turkey border. Senior officials in the Obama administration are having trouble keeping their story straight on whether the failure of our airstrikes means we should expect a new strategy involving American troops on the ground.

  • Does this mean we'll be training and arming moderate icecaps? Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel says that climate change is going to pose a big risk to America's military.
  • WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T PANIC! The Center for Disease Control says it must "rethink" its Ebola strategy after a Texas nurse caught the virus. Do I have Ebola, Google? The Internet giant is testing live-video medical advice.
  • Texas gubernatorial candidate Wendy Davis (D) is trying to deflect bipartisan criticism of her new campaign ad (it focuses on the fact that opponent Greg Abbott is in a wheelchair) by calling Abbott a hypocrite.
  • KMart is the latest major retailer to experience a security breach. Over 1,000 stores' registers were compromised by malware.
  • The Vatican is taking a kinder tone towards gays by focusing less on the Catholic Church's belief that homosexual acts are sinful, and emphasizing that LGBT individuals have "gifts and qualities to offer" the Church.
  • Denmark is moving toward banning bestiality.

Follow Reason and Reason 24/7 on Twitter, and like us on Facebook. You can also get the top stories mailed to you—sign up here.

NEXT: Russian-Backed Leader in Ukraine Unconscious After Attack

Zenon Evans is a former Reason staff writer and editor.

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  1. WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T PANIC!

    I AM TOTALLY LOSING MY SHIT RIGHT NOW!

    1. Actually I was panicking before it was cool.

      1. db

        I was panicking before Ron Bailey told me everything would be OK. But I feel pretty good about it all now.

        1. Pl?ya Manhattan.

          Yo dude. Email Carl if you haven’t already.

          1. db

            ??

            1. Carl ?s the level

              DO IT!

              …he said with a lascivious look in his eyes.

              1. db

                OK, definitely not now.

                1. Carl ?s the level

                  It was a joke!

                  1. db

                    I don’t get it.

          2. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…

            1. Carl ?s the level

              Quit your meddling, or I’ll tell everyone your real BMI.

              1. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…

              2. His BMI is e.

                1. db

                  Ah, so he’s naturally logy.

                  1. He’s also irrational.

                    1. NotAnotherSkippy

                      Wouldn’t pi*e be more appropriate?

                  2. Trigger Warning

                    Pate to the party, but that was fucking great.

                    1. Trigger Warning

                      er, late

          3. The Laconic

            WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT

            1. Carl ?s the level

              We’re having an in-depth email conversation about you, actually.

              And your mom.

        2. Warty

          Email Thane you fucking idiot or I’ll kill you.

          1. jesse.in.mb

            Warty will of course rape you (and not in the good way) first. Best just to do what he says.

            You really should just email Thane/Carl.

      2. Doghouse Riley Jr.

        I was panicking before it was cool.

        Does that make you a hipsteric?

        1. The end is nigh-ronic.

      3. Faceless Commenter

        Actually I was panicking before it was cool.

        Oh yeah? Well I’ve already died before my time of a horrible overdose and my agent is looking for The Next Faceless Commenter.

        1. That’s weird.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      WHERE’S MY TOWEL?

    3. MJGreen

      My throat has been ticklish since yesterday. I’m panicking that I am coming down with a cold so early this season.

      BUT WHAT IF IT’S EBOLA???

      1. Can I have your stuff when you die? No, wait, you probably touched most of it, so never mind.

        1. Agammamon

          he’s licking all of it now, just to make sure.

  2. …by calling Abbott a hypocrite.

    A hypocrite on wheels.

    1. Anonymous Coward

      Just wait until she accuses Abbott of raping her with his eyes.

    2. Game of Thrones fan

      Those are worst kind of hypocrites.

    3. Faceless Commenter

      He’s one of those guys who wants to push over the ladder of success after he’s climbed it. Or in his case, he wants to outlaw handicap spots now that he’s parked right in front of TGI Friday’s and gone to the head of the line at the happy hour buffet.

    4. Mobile Hypocrites!

      I smell a Kickstarter!

  3. KMart is the latest major retailer to experience a security breach.

    Luckily no one shops at KMart so there were no victims.

    1. Andrew S.

      I didn’t know that KMart was still around. The one near me actually turned into a charter school campus of all things.

      1. I thought Sears bought them or something like that.

        1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

          Sears and K-Mart, two drunks holding each other up…

          1. Hyperion

            My wife and I would always go into the local Sears because it was really strange how it would be a Saturday evening and we were the only ones in the store. Then it closed. All good things come to an end.

            1. thom

              It seems like Sears is trying to be an upscale Wal-Mart. They have everything for sale. I walked through the Sears at the Mall of America a while back and they had a whole display of garden hoses…who’s going to go to the mall to buy a garden hose?

              1. Hyperion

                Everything at Sears is overpriced. My wife has bought a few pieces of cheap 14k jewelry there, but like I said, the main attraction to going in there was that the store was empty, it was sort of surreal. We never go into the one at the mall.

          2. Cytotoxic

            What is so bad about Sears?

            1. Hyperion

              The prices for a start.

              1. Migrant Log Picker

                They have always had pretty decent tools for very good prices on sale and if they break free replacement. That said beside tools I haven’t bought anything at Sears aside from tools in decades.

                1. Spoonman.

                  Appliances are good too, especially the discounts they’ll give you at a Sears Outlet.

        2. robc

          Technically Kmart bought Sears and took the Sears name.

    2. db

      How low on the hacker food chain do you have to be to target K-Mart?

      I actually feel a bit bad.to see K-Mart and Sears in the trouble they are in. I remember when I was a kid and they were the best stores we had (outside of that hoity-toity J C Penney we used to shop at to show we were better than everyone else).

      1. I always remind the WalMart haters that they just need to wait a while. Sears and Kmart were Walmart before it was cool and you see what happened to them. Eventually these mega-stores collapse under the weight. Not a value judgement, just an observation.

        1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

          Woolworth’s and Woolco, Montgomery-Ward, Treasure Island (which was part of J.C. Penney, itself in no great shakes), Zayre…

          You could also add A&P, which had the grocery world well cornered for a while, before it all fell apart.

          1. Brandon

            And Service Merchandise.

          2. The Original Jason

            Woolworth is still around as Foot Locker?

          3. Venture

      2. CE

        Exactly.

        Hacker 1: “Dude, I’ve hacked K-Mart! High five!”

        Hacker 2: “Don’t bother me. I’m hacking the Pentagon again.”

  4. …and emphasizing that LGBT individuals have “gifts and qualities to offer” the Church.

    Well we might as well be Episcopalians at this point.

    1. Florida Man

      Right!? I don’t get religion. “This book is the word of God and infallible until it hurts our congregations numbers and donations drop, then we can soften.” Fuck man, stand tall and look gays in the eyes and tell them they are going to hell. If you can’t maybe you should pick a different religion.
      /rant off

      1. creech

        My wife’s Presbyterian church is going through this right now. Should they or should they not allow church and pastor to hold gay marriage ceremony. The church produced a 24 page white paper on the subject with numerous biblical quotes that could support either position. So if the Bible isn’t clear cut, then any Christian religion needs to honestly say “we follow the Bible except for
        this book, this verse, etc.”

        1. trshmnster the terrible

          Generally, different churches have different doctrines about enforcing the laws of the Bible. It’s not a matter of “except” but one of balancing scriptures that don’t clearly settle on a resolution for an issue.

        2. Florida Man

          I’m not a theologian. The way I understand the bible is Old Testament was the rules prior to Jesus sacrificing himself for the worlds sins and now the New Testament is the way a Christian is suppose to live. Lots of tolerance, forgiveness, charity, etc. However lots of people like to point to the Old Testament for how others should live and apply the New Testament to their own way of living. That’s why people get conflicting messages.

          1. trshmnster the terrible

            Yeah, I’m not a theologian either, but my understanding is that through Jesus, we’re given the gift of being unhooked from the old (mosaic) law, but in order to accept said gift, we have to take up the mantle and follow in the footsteps of Jesus. That means both a fidelity to the New Testament, and a respect for the Old Testament laws which are still in effect.

            In essence, it’s impossible to be perfect under the old law, but willful disregard for it calls into question the whole “following in the footsteps” thing.

            1. Florida Man

              Except other than Jews no one is holding up the old laws. Modern Christians by this definition are all deficient and have no right to judge others.

              1. Pl?ya Manhattan.

                This mixed fiber fabric feels really nice on my balls.

                1. Doesn’t it chafe?

              2. trshmnster the terrible

                Agreed. Thus why I’m not a socon.

          2. Restoras

            The Bible is long enough and written by enough different people over a sufficiently long period of time that you can find passages to support anything you like.

            1. thom

              Anything?

          3. Fluffy

            The funny thing is that when you religos get together you team up and tell me that we NEED a god figure because otherwise everybody would just make up their own morality. And that the Judeo-Christian tradition is better than secular humanism because it gives everyone simple moral truths to understand and follow.

            But then I observe y’all talking among yourselves, and you:

            1. Don’t agree on shit
            2. Find everything to be incredibly complex

            So I suspect you haven’t been entirely straight with me.

            1. robc

              Those two points differ from librrtarians in what way?

      2. thom

        It’s pathetic that this kind of stuff even matters and that people spend their entire lives cloaking themselves in this nonsense.

        1. Certified Public Asskicker

          My grandmother had a major sad when I told her no, I am not going to baptize my children because I no longer believe in the silliness. Besides, what kind of loving God would punish children because their dad is an anti-church asshole?

          “But you know better!” was her response.

          Fuck you Grandma*.

          *I still love you though.

      3. Bill Dalasio

        Well, strictly speaking, haven’t they already gone that route with premarital sex?

      4. lap83

        A majority of Christians will likely still believe in the traditional view of marriage. Just because establishment religious officials say something doesn’t mean it’s shared by most, much less all.

      5. CE

        Sort of like the Republican platform.

    2. EvH/GKC has a disappoint.

      1. EDG reppin' LBC

        Hey Ted, I’m setting up a Pre-Code “film festival” in my Amazon Instant video. Should be fun. They just don’t make films like they used to.

      2. Notorious G.K.C.

        Um, here is the document:

        http://press.vatican.va/conten…..03037.html

        They want a pastoral approach to people in irregular unions, and their children, including people in same-sex unions, but they add:

        “The Church furthermore affirms that unions between people of the same sex cannot be considered on the same footing as matrimony between man and woman. Nor is it acceptable that pressure be brought to bear on pastors or that international bodies make financial aid dependent on the introduction of regulations inspired by gender ideology.”

        This is in line with the Catechism, approved by St. John Paul II on the recommendation of then-Cardinal Ratzinger, which declares:

        “The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.”

        http://www.vatican.va/archive/…..s2c2a6.htm

        1. Notorious G.K.C.

          As if it were possible to love people while opposing their political demands – fancy that!

          1. Marshall Gill

            How poorly the last couple have compared to Karol J?zef Wojty?a. It will probably be some time, if ever, before the Church produces another like him.

            1. Bo Cara Esq.

              This comment explains some things.

              1. Marshall Gill

                That I respect a dude who fought the Nazis and then the Commies and helped bring down the Iron Curtain? A dude so repellent to the commies that the KGB tried to have him assassinated? That the current Pope is a Socialist and the one before didn’t fight the Nazis but kinda went along?

                Science you are a mendacious cunt.

  5. BiMonSciFiCon

    Texas gubernatorial candidate Wendy Davis (D) is trying to deflect bipartisan criticism of her new campaign ad (it focuses on the fact that opponent Greg Abbott is in a wheelchair) by calling Abbott a hypocrite.

    How many points is she going to lose by? 15? 20?

    1. Andrew S.

      At least 20, because of the blatant misogyny of Texas voters. That’s the only reason people would vote against her, right?

      (I’m just waiting for that with Hillary 2016)

      1. ant1sthenes

        Well, in the case of HRC, I’d rather they blame the failure of her campaign on rampant misogyny than the failure of her policies.

        1. CE

          Hillary will lose due to ageism.

    2. Brian D

      Am I in a minority of people who didn’t think the ad was intended to make fun of his disability (or even did so unintentionally), and that the people having a case of the vapors about it are just being hypersensitive? Not that I don’t savor the irony of a liberal female being raked over the coals for supposedly attacking a member of the victim class, albeit a racist/sexist/ratbagging Teathuglican one.

      1. Brian D

        Well, hypersensitive or gleefully pretending to be offended for political gain.

        1. BiMonSciFiCon

          I don’t think your argument has a leg to stand on.

          1. trshmnster the terrible

            We’re going to have to wheel that argument out of here once you’re done with it!

            1. BiMonSciFiCon

              I think the Republican outrage is just their way of kicking Davis when she’s down.

            2. lap83

              enough of the lame puns

              1. BiMonSciFiCon

                You’re no fun.

                1. BiMonSciFiCon

                  What was that whooshing sound that just went over my head?

                  1. lap83

                    a handicapable person trying to smack you with their crutch and missing?

      2. The thing is, the Wendy Davises of the world are the ones claiming to be broad-minded and tolerant, when they’re really just as nasty and bigoted as they claim everybody else is.

        It’s projection all the way.

      3. Emmerson Biggins

        All of here commercials so far have been “He voted aginst/was against” such-and-such waste-of-money-act of 2006! WHY DOE HE HATE [victim group] ?

        So I really don’t mind seeing her get hoisted on her own retard here.

      4. Faceless Commenter

        “Am I in a minority of people who didn’t think the ad was intended to make fun of his disability (or even did so unintentionally), and that the people having a case of the vapors about it are just being hypersensitive?”
        ——————–
        No. In fact, the people jumping all over her for “insensitivity” are equally exploiting the issue.

        The problem with the ad is that it’s just wrong-headed. “He’s handicapped and yet he’s not a bleeding-heart liberal” is liberallogic.

      5. I’ve always looked forward to the “close to the election” ads, because they’re so full of vitriol. 🙂

        I want Abbot to put out an ad that makes fun of that mole on Wendy Davis’ chin. I mean, she’s just pissed because someone dropped a house on her sister.

    3. lap83

      I don’t want to live in a world where we’re not free to make fun of handicapped politicians.

      1. Shirley Knott

        That’s bigoted!
        We should make fun of all politicians, regardless of their handicap-able status.

        Have you heard about the priest who was checking into his hotel and asked if the porn channels were disabled?
        The clerk looks at him with disgust and says “No, they’re all able-bodied, you sick fuck!”
        I laughed and laughed.

        1. lap83

          True, but handicapped politicians are easier to mock because it’s harder for them to run (for office).

        2. CE

          I thought the priest was going to ask the clerk to re-enable them.

      2. Faceless Commenter

        Greg Abbott’s fantasy is to have sex standing up.

  6. Brian D

    Does this mean we’ll be training and arming moderate icecaps? Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel says that climate change is going to pose a big risk to America’s military.

    Rising sea levels will engulf our Navy!

    1. BiMonSciFiCon

      Are they even trying anymore? Were they ever?

    2. The DerpRider

      More water means more navy means more ships. Climate change is an economic multiplier!

      1. Auric Demonocles

        But the submarines will get raised up too much by the extra water!

        1. The DerpRider

          Anyone want to start a ballast supply company?

      2. CE

        Plus it’ll be faster to get to Russia or China, with no icecaps.

  7. Does this mean we’ll be training and arming moderate icecaps? Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel says that climate change is going to pose a big risk to America’s military.

    FUCK YOU, EVANS. JUST POST LINKS AND LEAVE THE JOKES FOR US.

    1. The DerpRider

      Convert all ships to submarines. Problem solved.

  8. How on Earth could climate change pose a risk to our military? I mean, even in La-La Land?

    1. Brian D

      What about our coastal bases, huh? And all our shipyards that will be soon submerged under ten feet of water when all the ice on earth melts?! Plus all our altimeters will need to be recalibrated to account for the new higher sea level!

    2. Game of Thrones fan

      In the year 2025, Mother Nature became self-aware…

      1. Is 2025 the year Voyager finally leaves the solar system?

        1. Florida Man

          No, the year voyager gets to the delta quadrant.

        2. Auric Demonocles

          Yes. Wait, no. Wait, yes again…

          1. We’re really taking out the excitement for the day when Voyager finally passes through the outer reaches of the Oort cloud, aren’t we?

            1. Auric Demonocles

              I’ll bring the beer.

            2. CE

              Turns out the Universe is Oort Cloud all the way down.

      2. Agammamon

        In the year 2525 if man is still alive, if woman can survive, you may find . . .

    3. creech

      Hey, it takes a hundred years to modify our military’s equipment right? Like the Army is still using the horse drawn caissons of the Civil War era.

      1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

        Meanwhile our domestic caisson industry has gone down the drain. Guess they should have gotten some lobbyists, made sure there were plenty of congressional districts with caisson manufacturing, etc.

    4. Pl?ya Manhattan.

      Part of the job of the military is to plan for everything.

      I have lefties posting shit on my Facebook feed about how this is evidence that even the DoD believes in climate change.

      The DoD has plans for an alien invasion. Doesn’t mean it’s happening.

      1. Oh, good. The military will now spend hundreds of billions on climate change defenses.

        1. Pl?ya Manhattan.

          I’m not current on what the plan is, but 10 years ago, most of the talk surrounding climate change focused on naval power in the arctic to protect our economic interests. That, and freedom of navigation.

        2. NotAnotherSkippy

          *ding* Many of the same people that correctly see the military trumping up international threats as an excuse for more funding completely fail to see $150/ga bio-avgas as the same stupid shit, because teh klimate!

    5. Auric Demonocles

      Do you really expect the government to be able to handle doing extra laundry for all those sweaty clothes?

    6. James Taggart

      They’re going to have to put air conditioners in stuff and issue lots of sunscreen.

  9. SIV

    Denmark is moving toward banning bestiality.

    Nothing is going right for those dogfuckers at the CDC.

    1. The banality of banning.

      1. The banality of ebola.

  10. Do I have Ebola, Google?

    Lick your Android and it will tell you if you have Ebola.

    1. db

      “You do now.”

  11. RBS

    “gifts and qualities to offer” the Church.

    I’m sure they do.

  12. Coeus

    Emboldened by gamergate, atheists are finally mounting a defense

    Atheists Don’t Owe Your Social Justice Agenda a Damn Thing

    Did I sleep through some radical redefining of the word ‘atheist’? It’s always been my understanding that an ‘atheist’ is someone who simply lacks belief in deities. That’s it. Somehow, though, it’s suddenly incumbent on atheists to take up certain social and political causes, and that’s just silly.

    1. Salon: “There’s too many white male atheists!”

      That’s yet another badge of honor for white males if you ask me. Rationality is indifferent to race and gender, and if white males are supposedly over-represented in this group then perhaps the underrepresented groups should be taking notes.

      1. Rationality is indifferent to … gender

        I though you said you were married.

      2. MJGreen

        That’s what always gets me when such a declaration is made. “There are too many white male atheists / gamers / scientists / engineers / libertarians / donors.” OK, so what? I guess a disproportionate number of white males will continue being awesome and having fun.

    2. I just wish the damn video game kerfuffle weren’t called “Gamergate”. I’m sick and tired of the fucking -gate suffix.

      1. grrizzly

        Is it true that “Gamergate” actually refers to just one side of the kerfuffle?

        1. Hyperion

          It’s been taken up by the gamers and there’s a website.

          1. The Laconic

            The other side is called Gamergategate.

      2. MJGreen

        Apparently we have Adam Baldwin to thank for that? What the fuck, Jayne?

    3. The Laconic

      Ugh. Are this still a thing?

      1. The Laconic

        is*

        1. ant1sthenes

          I liked it better the first way.

    4. Hyperion

      Atheists Don’t Owe Your Social Justice Agenda a Damn Thing

      No more lovely words have ever been spoken.

    5. Anonymous Coward

      You mean the atheists who are as bold as fuck when it comes to Christianity but quiet as church mice when it comes to Judaism, Islam, or the Progressive god-state have decided to sack up and resist?

      Today really is a banner day.

      1. The Laconic

        Erm, Sam Harris is bold as fuck when it comes to Islam. He’s catching a lot of flak for it.

        1. Anonymous Coward

          Ok, Sam Harris I’ll give you. Anybody who gets Ben Affleck’s panties wadded up can’t be all bad.

          1. The Laconic

            And I’ll grant you that atheists pick on Christianity more than other religions. I think there are good reasons for that, but not good excuses for that. Why should, say, Jainists get off so easily?

            1. Florida Man

              I think it is a function of Christianity being the majority. That and Christians don’t cut your head off.

              1. The Laconic

                Indeed, those are the kind of reasons I had in mind.

              2. CE

                Don’t count on it. The Inquisition can be restarted at any time.

            2. Anonymous Coward

              I’ve been told the reason is that Christianity is the prominent and most local religion of many atheists, hence their focus on it, which makes a certain amount of sense, in that you argue what you know. The problem is that when atheists run off on a Bible rant, and you ask what’s wrong the Vedic texts, or the Koran and the Hadiths, they get a blank look.

              1. Anon E. Mouse

                I think the issue is that Shintoists, Buddhists, and islamists haven’t passed laws in the US that forbid the purchase of alcohol or hammers on Sunday, and Christians have. Ever lived in a “dry” county? Ever lived in a state that had “blue laws? Christianity has a profound influence on our laws and culture, where other religions do not.

                1. NotAnotherSkippy

                  At least until it is replaced by other religions.

                2. Christianity has a profound influence on our laws and culture

                  Progressives and Christians… or rather those professing same, had a profound influence on our laws and culture. The religion itself (not the Mosaic law, but the NT stuff they’re supposed to be following) really differentiates Caesar from God. Jesus himself was quite accommodating about religious dogma, and on several occasions in the NT got under the skin of the Jewish elders with his “lax” interpretation of Mosaic traditions.

                  But, leave it up to a bunch of busybodies who hate fun to pervert the whole shebang into a bunch of ill-conceived laws and restrictions on porn (and nudity, etc. etc.) I have little faith in mankind anyway. This sort of thing is just a glaring example why.

                  I mean, thanks to the Progs for Prohibition. 🙂

      2. Fluffy

        Not all atheists are quiet as church mice when it comes to Judaism.

        You know what atheist wasn’t quiet as a church mouse when it came to Judaism?

        1. Karl Marx?

        2. grrizzly

          Stephen Hawking?

        3. The Laconic

          Spinoza? It’s Spinoza.

        4. Anonymous Coward

          Josef Stalin?

        5. Juice

          Couldn’t have been Christian* Adolf Hitler.

          /*actually a Germanic pagan revivalist

          1. The Original Jason

            The Nazis pushed Positive Christianity as a step towards a more pure, more Nazi religion.

      3. Professor Woland

        Atheists tend to live in countries where they are more likely to come in contact with Christianity on a day to day basis than Islam. Most of them are perfectly willing to bash on Islam when it comes up, but their lives are more affected by the Christians in their community than some lunatic across the ocean.

        1. True, but since this whole “War on Terror” has sprouted up out of the Islamic (*insert jihadist name here*), I’d like to see more Atheists bashing the hell out of Islam.

          I mean, just run the entire crap-infested nonsense into the ground. Throw some common sense or rational thought into Islam too. It needs weeding more than the waning effects of Christianity….

          1. GamerFromJump

            Happy to do my part. Maybe I’ll take my English Lit major and run down the Koran with exactly what it says.

  13. Does this mean we’ll be training and arming moderate icecaps? Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel says that climate change is going to pose a big risk to America’s military.

    Looks like the DoD is reserving their spot at the feeding trough. There’s big money in the “look how I’ve been effected by climate change” industry.

  14. Jerry on the sea

    emphasizing that LGBT individuals have “gifts and qualities to offer” the Church.

    Choreography and flower arrangement?

    1. Brandon

      Cash. And cash.

  15. Restoras

    the failure of our airstrikes means we should expect a new strategy involving American troops on the ground

    It’s like QE, or even Keynesian economics. The more it fails, the more you pile on.

    1. Cytotoxic

      Given that these airstrikes have been pitifully sparse, it’s really nothing like that.

      1. NotAnotherSkippy

        Accept no substitutes! Demand your Arc Light today!

  16. Denmark is moving toward banning bestiality.

    [Insert Muslim immigrant joke]

  17. DEG

    I read through the whole GamerGate thread from the weekend. The progressives that showed up epitomized everything I hate about progressives.

    1. waffles

      I don’t believe they were real. Real assholes, sure, but not true believers.

      1. I’d say it was yet another in the “trigger” group that wanders around the web looking for stories about gamergate and interjecting the party line. They’re not very bright, to be sure, but they do have lots of time on their hands.

        I made the mistake of telling an article writer to lighten up, they’re just words… and well, let’s just say I started a loooong thread with just one or two posts. After a couple of attempts to bring some rationality into it, I gave up and let them swarm in like a bunch of fire ants. Not worth the trouble, to be honest. There was actually more than one person (many, sadly) that used the “Fire in a Crowded Theater” argument about censoring “offensive” speech.

        Objectivity is _not_ their strong suit.

    2. Hyperion

      So you weren’t disappointed? Don’t worry, the proggies will never let you down if it’s shreeking insanity that you are looking for.

      1. The the Cleveland Browns are a bunch of proggies?

        1. Hyperion

          So it’s the Cleveland Browns that are behind the gamergate thing?

      2. DEG

        No, it was about what I expected. The commentators that responded to the progs were more reasoned than I would have been and persevered longer than I would have. At some point I would have responded “Fuck off slaver” and walked away.

        1. Hyperion

          I would have told them that I will play the games I want to, fuck your social justice and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. But I do enjoy your useless flailing and foaming at the mouth. I’ll be right back, need more popcorn and beers.

  18. Hyperion

    Does this mean we’ll be training and arming moderate icecaps?

    It’s difficult when the icecaps are always switching sides.

    1. RBS

      If I’ve learned anything in 32 years it’s that when the ice melts something incredibly vicious will thaw out a kill everyone, one by one.

      1. Hyperion

        A killer wooly mammoth?

        1. Florida Man

          Brendan Fraser ?

      2. Horatio

        Haley Joel Osment?

      3. trshmnster the terrible

        That witch from the original power Rangers?

    2. Pl?ya Manhattan.

      I see what you did there.

  19. waffles

    DO I HAVE EBOLA!?

    PLS RESPOND

    1. 8 ball says “chances are good”

      1. trshmnster the terrible

        It just so happens that the 8ball came from ebola man’s apartment.

    2. Andrew S.

      You do. Please lock yourself in a room for the next 21 days with no other human contact. Not even with your monocle-polishing orphan slaves. Good luck.

      1. Brandon

        WTF, Andrew? The orphans are poor, and therefore by definition not human.

  20. Attention KMart shoppers…right now back in our identity theft department, for the next ten minutes, and ten minutes only, we will be having a blue light special on our identity theft protection plan – for only 29.95 per year, you can be protected and insured against anything bad happening from the data we just lost. oops. That;s right, you heard me only 29.95 to buy back a little peace of mind we ripped from you earlier. Anyway, hurry on back where you see that flashing blue light, and as always, thanks for shopping here at our Kmart.

    One of my first jobs was at kmart and I had to do these stupid things for every department, because they all hated doing them and stumbled badly through them.

    1. The DerpRider

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NmzF9pj9Yk

  21. Anon E. Mouse

    “Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel says that climate change is going to pose a big risk to America’s military.”

    In other words, we need to spend a few billion dollars designing jets that run on unicorn farts, and ships that run on recycled vegetable oil, and we need more of them than we have now.

    1. Agammamon

      Funny story – we (the Navy) used to run our small craft on biodiesel.

      Now it is explicitly forbidden in regs. That shit is fucking corrosive.

  22. Andrew S.

    Krugtard’s Rolling Stone article on how awesome Obama is is “trending” on Facebook, and my prog friends are all over it.

    Because, I mean, if a NOBEL PRIZE WINNING ECONOMIST thinks that, who am I to argue?

    1. MJGreen

      If even Paul Krugman came around on Obama, then the only reason to hate Obama is if you’re a racist.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      It’s Nobels all the way down

    3. The Laconic

      Good, I say. Let them strap on this albatross even tighter. With any luck, they’ll strangle themselves.

    4. Especially since Krugman is America’s only living economist and one of two in the world, the other being Piketty.

    5. lap83

      economics is a fake science except when economists agree with me

  23. MJGreen

    If you have a few minutes: Alberto Mingardi’s review of a new book about liberalism. Basically, a former The Economist writer chronicles the history of liberalism, but mostly of the liberalism he prefers. Hayek’s picture is on the cover, yes; so is FDR’s.

    You can guess the tactics that the author uses to marginalize classical liberals. If they’re not ignored, they’re demonized, usually with the implication that they’ve been bought off. Mises is dismissed as one of “the first of a new kind of intellectual: think tankers paid by special interests. In his time at New York University, rich bankers, notably the Volker Foundation, paid Mises’s salary.”

    1. Jerry on the sea

      And if you’re a classical-liberal professor at a public university they call you a hypocrite for taking public money.

    2. Cytotoxic

      Fuck The Economist.

  24. Coeus

    Skepchick makes light of domestic violence in an article about how awful Richard Dawkins is.

    JK: Oh yeah, I tell the story of how I became an atheist in the book. It wasn’t this cool epiphany that you hear the scientists talk about. I was very college kid agnostic, like “Look at the stars, there has to be something out there, we’re all one!” Because I was high.

    AK: I want to punch you right now.

    JK: Allison looks so violent right now.

    Not a single commenter has said a word about it.

    1. BiMonSciFiCon

      Remember the Jezebel article about how the author (and all of the commenters) beat up their boyfriends (or had at one time), and nobody said a word about it?

      1. Carl ?s the level

        No, they said something about it: they revelled in the GURL POWAH!

    2. Carl ?s the level

      I was very college kid agnostic, like “Look at the stars, there has to be something out there, we’re all one!” [emphasis mine]

      That’s not what agnostic means.

      1. Coeus

        They’re SJWs. If they knew what they were talking about, they wouldn’t be SJWs.

    3. Just hovering over the link and seeing the title, there’s no way you’re getting me to click on it.

  25. Raven Nation

    Iceland defeats Netherlands in European qualifying:

    http://www.bbc.com/sport/0/football/29603725

    1. CE

      Iceland? What are they going to call themselves when the ice all melts? Greenland is already taken.

      1. CE

        And “Waterworld” would be a disaster of Titanic proportions.

  26. The Laconic

    Aw, Denmark, I thought you were cool.

  27. Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel says that climate change is going to pose a big risk to America’s military.

    See how climate change isn’t just an environmental issue, it’s a gift from the gods for any and all forms of government power to grow infinitely?

  28. KMart is the latest major retailer to experience a security breach. Over 1,000 stores’ registers were compromised by malware.

    I have some experience in this… you’d be shocked to find out how many POS systems are running Windows on the same network middle management is browsing porn.

    1. Pl?ya Manhattan.

      That is so stupid, it borders on criminal. IIRC, Home Depot gave network access to one of its small vendors. The ENTIRE NETWORK.

      1. Way more common than you’d ever think, know or believe.

        I aged at twice the rate of inflation at my recently departed job because we fought and lost so many battles on that front.

        1. Pl?ya Manhattan.

          I’ve experienced it quite a bit too. But one company I worked for from ’02-’04 had the opposite problem. So many unnecessary security layers that it hindered productivity very severely.

          Turns out, the IT purchasing manager was banging the sales rep from RSA. I was very glad to see him go.

          1. So many unnecessary security layers that it hindered productivity very severely.

            There’s a balance. The key is to find people who understand real security threats and can not fall into Worst Case Thinking.

            One of the guys I worked with was super smart, and I had a lot of respect for him, but he suffered from the most extensive case of Worst First thinking I’ve ever seen. He was convinced that Ninjas were rappelling down the building every night and stealing Mrs. Cravitz’s urinalysis results.

            Turns out, the IT purchasing manager was banging the sales rep from RSA. I was very glad to see him go.

            Huh, my boss was banging his employees. I was very glad to see him go, too.

            1. Horatio

              Why the hell else would anyone put up with employees, though?

            2. Emmerson Biggins

              Huh, my boss was banging his employees. I was very glad to see him go, too.

              he let you watch?

              1. Anon E. Mouse

                He said “see him go”, not “see him come…”

        2. robc

          Yup. The small company I worked for in late 90s was on same network with a Gigantic Enterprise. They wised up and kicked all their vendors off.

    2. robc

      Piece of shit system running Windows? Isnt that redundant?

      Oh, you meant the other POS.

      1. I was wondering how long it would take for someone to make the crack. I little under an hour. We’re losing our touch I think.

    3. Cytotoxic

      I’m sure the ACA network and information piping will work out better.

  29. Coeus

    Krugnuts rides again…

    Wolfgang M?nchau says the right thing: Germany doesn’t actually have a strong domestic economy. It’s more or less at full employment thanks to an immense trade surplus that has yet to diminish significantly:

    And even so, and despite negative real interest rates, it’s not in a roaring boom. Without that huge surplus ? driven, as M?nchau says, by investment booms abroad ? Germany would be very clearly in the grips of secular stagnation.

    So you see, they’re making stuff that people want to buy. That’s the only reason their economy is successful. And apparently that means it’s fake, somehow.

    1. Andrew S.

      But they’re missing all of those sweet government spending multipliers!

      1. And we’re supposed to lose ours in the next *checks watch* 17 days. If the economy slows down after that, I guess the Fed rate will drop to -5%.

        fun fact, in 2005, Fed assets as a percentage of GDP were 7%, they’re nearly 26% today. The zombie apocalypse can’t happen soon enough.

    2. MJGreen

      Attracting investment is a sure sign of an underlying economic malady.

    3. Agammamon

      But, but, but – they’re making things their employees *can’t afford*!!!!!!!

      everyone knows that if you don’t have a strong domestic economy – if you don’t make everything at home – then you’re poor.

      Though why its bad to buy from other countries, but good to buy from your own, but bad to make it all yourself is never explained that well.

    4. Cytotoxic

      Don’t look now, but Ireland is one of if not the best performing European economy right now. The one that came closest to austerity (flat spending). Krugman used to love to lambast them over that.

      1. What’s your definition of ‘best performing?’ They have a GDP growth rate that’s almost flat and their unemployment rate is 11.5%.

        Their unemployment rate is still lower than continental Europe’s, but it’s worse than Britain and far worse than Germany.

        1. Never mind, looks like you’re right.

          Ireland’s GDP is apparently on pace for like 5.5% growth this year. That’s spectacular. I guess they rebounded a lot from 2013.

  30. Doghouse Riley Jr.

    So late Friday night/early Saturday morning around 2:30 I was watching a movie in my moderately nice apartment of low elevation. The apartment came with large venetian blinds which I keep angled down so I can look out. A dark car pulled up outside and just sat there, double parked, lights on, motor running. I glanced at it and it seemed like a cop car – new model domestic, etc. I didn’t think much about it, but when I sat up, the car moved forward a few inches. Sat up straight, the car moved again, as if the driver was trying to keep sight of me sitting in my easy chair, lit by the glow of the TV. The movie ended so I turned off the TV and the cop drove off. I seemed to be the only person up in the complex at that time so I guess I was standing out, so to speak, as I was minding my own business in the pseudo-privacy of my home. I have to wonder a) was I just paranoid or b) was the cop hoping to see me doing something potentially illegal so he could bust me or c) the cop was just a voyeur and I was the only show going at the moment?

    It didn’t make for the best way to end the night, that’s for sure.

    1. The Laconic

      Did you take a potshot at him? That’ll usually clear up the ambiguity.

      1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

        I think shooting through a window would make me forfeit my deposit, among other things.

        I expect Paul Krugman to take me to task for not giving a glazier a job.

    2. Game of Thrones fan

      Were you watching porn on TV?

      1. Damn you! 🙂

    3. What happened when you started jerking off to the porno movie you were watching?

      1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

        Battle of Algiers isn’t especially fappable, at least not for me.

        1. Ah, so you were watching Alex Trebek lecture us on why we need to learn more about Africa.

          1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

            Didn’t catch that part, was just flipping channels, saw that it was on and watched the end – turned off on FIN, hoping the cop would lose interest and go.

            Seeing over-reacting, violent police on screen did not make me feel better about my observer.

    4. Hyperion

      Just what were you doing up at 2:30am? Whey does anyone need to be up at 2:30am. You were obviously up to no good, good people are not up at that time of the morning.

      1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

        Unfortunately, I’d bet the cop thought exactly this. Good thing I turned out the lights like decent people would.

        1. Hyperion

          Good thing you didn’t have a dog that the cop could see through the window.

    5. I have to wonder a) was I just paranoid

      No.

      was the cop hoping to see me doing something potentially illegal so he could bust me or

      Probably.

      c) the cop was just a voyeur and I was the only show going at the moment?

      B & C can be true at the same time.

  31. There’s no FedGov interest other than grandstanding:

    Asshole wants to make trespassing on municipal property a federal crime with increased sentences

    (I presume you can guess without hovering over the link who the asshole is.)

    1. Hyperion

      I say we make moobz a crime.

      1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

        You can make it part of the war on obesity and get radfems behind it as, uh, appropriating female heritage. Something like that.

        1. Hyperion

          I was actually referring to THE Moobz, not moobz in general. They may be unsightly and all, but a guy still has the right to have them.

          1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

            Now that would be a tough one for the Supremes: can you actually make a person – not a criminal, but actually make their existence a crime?

            I guess if you can get a legislative body behind it maybe you can squeak it in under judicial deference.

            1. No Bills of Attainder or Corruption of the Blood.

    2. Agammamon

      How could this be anything except a blatant ‘fuck you’ to the 10th amendment?

      Does the man not understand that there is a difference between ‘federal’ and ‘municipal’?

      1. Agammamon

        Not to mention that his arguements of the dangers of trespassing on NYC’s monuments (which I find weak) don’t necessarily apply to the rest of the country.

        For example – I am pretty sure that there’s not a lot of danger to ‘first responders or commuters’ if you happen to trespass on the Yuma Quartermaster’s Depot or the old city hall building. Certainly no enough to make a federal crime worth 5 years in prison for.

        1. robc

          Ive never been on Kennesaw Mtn without trespassing. For some reason, the Mtn is closed at night.

          1. Agammamon

            Got a lot of places like that around Tucson – basically small parks off the side of the road in the middle of the desert and they still pay someone to drive out there and lock the parking areas at sunset.

            1. Fluffy

              If they didn’t do that, people might meet there and have sex!

              It’s certainly worth the expense if it stops, you know, sex.

              1. people might meet there and have sex!

                Government is just doing it’s job. Hookups and public sex are for Rest Areas and State Welcome centers…

    3. ant1sthenes

      Wow, I actually did guess correctly. In a sea of assholes, he really does stand out.

      1. Brandon

        Well, part of him does. Two parts.

  32. Denmark is moving toward banning bestiality.

    Fuck you, Zaxxon. We hat-tip around these parts.

    1. Anon E. Mouse

      What I find particularly disturbing is that according to the article, “A recent poll showed 76% of Danes supported the ban”. That means that 24% of Danes either didn’t support it, or were indifferent.

      1. Doghouse Riley Jr.

        “As long as the horse doesn’t say ‘neigh’, who am I to judge?”

      2. Pope Jimbo

        And those 24% took a very creepy interest in the pollsters wool sweater.

      3. Agammamon

        Well – its hard to come up with a rational objection to bestiality when we consider it OK to kill and eat animals.

        I know that if the choice was between being food or sex toy – sex toy looks pretty good.

        Outside of disgust there’s not much of a justification.

        OTOH – as a libertarian, shun those who do this shit. Don’t interact with them socially, don’t do business with them.

        But prog societies can’t allow that – *you* can’t decide who to associate with because you might make the wrong decision. So they have to legislature ‘correct’ behavior rather than, you know, letting the market sort it out.

        1. Cytotoxic

          This.

        2. Coeus

          Well – its hard to come up with a rational objection to bestiality when we consider it OK to kill and eat animals.

          That’s where I always come down on it as well. I have yet to hear a reason that doesn’t also justify veganism.

          1. Well, if you eat something, you don’t fuck it. And vice versa. So only vegetarians can get away with fucking animals, morally.

  33. Anonymous Coward

    FBI Director James Corney: IPhone 6 Protects Pedophiles, Kidnappers, and Terrorists

    Apple (AAPL, Tech30) recently took measures to enhance user privacy. Now, only users have the key to unlock text messages, photos and emails on their device. As such, iOS 8 will shield your data from anyone — including police.

    “The notion that people have devices… that with court orders, based on a showing of probable cause in a case involving kidnapping or child exploitation or terrorism, we could never open that phone? My sense is that we’ve gone too far when we’ve gone there,” Comey told CBS.

    LOL. The Fourth Amendment is such a quaint little idea. Can you actually imagine a world where people have a right to NOT have their persons or property seized and searched despite using the magic words “pedophile” or “terrorist”?

    1. Agammamon

      Of course, it never occurs to him that the reason we’ve gone here is that we can’t trust *him* to not use every bit of power he has to pry open our lives for the most trivial of offenses.

    2. Cytotoxic

      I think this is the guy I saw on 60 Minutes. Incredibly, the first 2/3 of the show is him talking about what an awesome stand he took against Bush’s worst ideas and how he blunted them. Then he starts talking about the iPhone 6 as a totally unjustifiable degree of privacy. Lights on not much at home.

  34. Denmark is moving toward banning bestiality

    Something is verboten in the state of Denmark.

    1. CE

      They felt emboldened to advance the measure now that Scotland had voted not to secede.

    2. “baaaa” means “No.”

  35. Mainer2

    RE: K-mart.

    There are youtube videos of Milton Friedman on the Phil Donahue show. One audience member raised the issue of K-mart and Sears merging, and how bad this would be…they would control the market.
    Friedman pointed out there would still be plenty of competition, but here’s what’s interesting. He didn’t mention Wal-mart. They were not enough of a presense yet. Now we fear Wal-mart and the Sears-Kmart merger is just sad.

    1. Brandon

      Every business that gets too big and clunky fails eventually. Government, on the other hand…

    2. PapayaSF

      I’m old enough to remember when the great monopoly threat was General Motors.

      1. My generation surrogated Ma Bell in place of GM. 🙂

  36. John

    http://www.newrepublic.com/art…..-dethroned

    I was going to quote this but it is so idiotic and hateful, I don’t know where to begin. At one point, the guy says the business suit should be banned in the same way other forms of religious dress are banned. I shit you not.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      I think it would be fantastic to get 20 local white guys to have a pretend “secret meeting of the patriarchy” every so often.

      Make sure some progs get wind of the meeting and are allowed to infiltrate the proceedings.

      Go way over the top. Have agenda items for awarding plum jobs to each other (or their sons). Talk about using their white mail privileges to siphon money from the bank accounts of minorities.

      I’d love to know how far over the top you would have to go before the prog spies realized they were being trolled.

      1. thom

        There would be beer served at this thing at least?

        1. Brandon

          Scotch. Old, white scotch.

          1. thom

            I guess it would be fun to watch the progs try to drink their scotch.

            1. Brandon

              “Is this scotch fair trade?”

              1. Agammamon

                That’s when the knives come out.

      2. creech

        That would be cool. Read the latest secret instructions from the Koch Brothers, pass around Sarah Palin pictures, polish monocles and show power point slides on productivity of the orphans in the silver mine.

        1. Horatio

          “Sir, should the Bills win the Super Bowl this year?”

          “No, and not in my lifetime.”

      3. Emmerson Biggins

        Hell, I haven’t worn a suit in years, but I might put one on for this.

    2. thom

      I wouldn’t mind a job where I had to wear a suit. They’ve never been a thing at any of the places I’ve ever worked, but I can imagine it would be nice to just get up every morning, grab a suit out of your closet, and be on your way.

      1. Do you somehow enjoy going through the day feeling like your sort of being strangled?

        1. thom

          Do people still wear ties? I guess I didn’t think ties were really a thing anymore either.

          1. They are a thing if you have a job where you have to wear a suit.

        2. You know, there are these people called “tailors”. Their job is to alter your clothing so it fits.

      2. Fluffy

        The thing about suits is this:

        You can look good in one when you’re middle-aged.

        You know what’s universally true about jeans?

        If you’re older than 30 and you’re wearing them, you look pathetic. You may not realize it, but you do.

        And everyone who wears khakis looks like fucking Jake from State Farm.

        1. Emmerson Biggins

          Do you wear a bow tie every day? Just wondering.

        2. CE

          I used to think that too, but when I turned 30, jeans were suddenly okay until you’re 40. Now it’s 50.

        3. John

          No you don’t. You know what looks pathetic after 30? Jeans and running shoes. Jeans and boots looks perfectly fine. Its the running shoes that are the problem.

          1. Fluffy

            Maybe if you’re in good shape.

            Or if you are Mike Rowe.

            But if you aren’t Mike Rowe and you wear jeans or khakis, you look like this:

            http://www.tacomaworld.com/for…..-image.jpg

            1. PapayaSF

              His problem is not that those used to be jeans.

            2. John

              I am not Mike Rowe. I am in good shape. Like any look you just have to own it. I love my cowboy boots and wear them with jeans all of the time. For me it works. If I were fat or really dorky, it wouldn’t work.

        4. Suthenboy

          Hehheh. fuck you Fluffy.

          In my work I wear jeans, boots and a pistol. I am well past that age and I look pretty badass.

    3. CE

      Banning neckties would be a good start.

  37. Agammamon

    . . .including more and worse natural disasters and the threat that food and water shortages could fuel disputes and instability around the world . . .

    Neither of which would be a threat to the US military if we didn’t insist on sending out troops to every natural disaster and violence hotspot that crops up.

    Seems to me that the actual threat to the US military is a succession of administrations that insist it ‘do something’ every time trouble flairs up all over the world.

    1. CE

      How do you expect them to be “a global force for good” if they just defend the USA?

  38. BiMonSciFiCon

    Supply and Demand: How does it work?

    1. Agammamon

      Fucking markets, how do they work?

      1. BiMonSciFiCon

        Apparently very sexistly.

    2. Juice

      A lot of the “female” products were the default unisex version.

  39. Cytotoxic

    Some good news regarding Syria: the White Shroud movement is picking them off at an accelerating pace.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..e-one.html

    The Twitter link the ‘ISIS takes Kobani’ link goes to is a 404 or something. I can’t find any story online in a Google News search of Kobani to backup the claim Kobani fell. Still seems to Kurdish Stalingrad.

  40. Texas AG (and Repub Governor Candidate) Greg Abbott argued in court that the state needs to ban gay marriage because heterosexuals will all stop reproducing if they don’t:

    First, Texas’s marriage laws are rationally related to the State’s interest in encouraging couples to produce new offspring, which are needed to ensure economic growth and the survival of the human race

    1. Agammamon

      Somebody should ask him why the survival of the human race is a state interest.

      1. “There has to be a nuclear bunker in Whitehall! Government doesn’t stop merely because the country has been destroyed!!”

      2. MJGreen

        Need someone to tax and control.

      3. Someone has to make his gold-plated wheelchair. 🙂

    2. Bo Cara Esq.

      Davis was wrong to focus on his wheelchair when his mental handicap is this obvious.

      1. Emmerson Biggins

        She is. I think the guy is pretty much a dick. But her commercials hove done nothing but try to bang the SJW gong as loudly as possible.

      2. John

        She was wrong to be an economic illiterate who seems to have no reason to want to be governor other than abortion and the fact that her opponent is in a wheelchair.

        She is just a terrible candidate.

        1. Bo Cara Esq.

          It is almost like choosing a candidate almost solely on one grandstanding event was not the best idea.

          1. Texas Democrats rode her filibuster shtick to its logical conclusion… getting her to run for governor (I was surprised not Lt. Governor…but eh.)

            The problem with Wendy Davis is she’s a bigger dipshit than Greg Abbot. I think Greg Abbot will win due to a slightly lower dipshit quotient.

            I can’t stand either candidate, but I do like attack ads. They sound so _serious_…

  41. KMart is the latest major retailer to experience a security breach. Over 1,000 stores’ registers were compromised by malware.

    I think the biggest shock here is the revelation that there are still more than 1,000 K-marts out there.

    1. Horatio

      All those future indoor skate parks and flea markets aren’t going to build themselves.

      1. antisocial-ist

        The one near where I grew up is best described as a “crack condo”

        1. Hyperion

          That’s obviously more profitable than a K-mart.

          K-mart was really the shit when I was growing up. Walmart didn’t even exist. And we were all fapping to the underwear models in the Sears and JC Penny catalogs, cause there were no intertoobs and pr0n mags were hard to come by. Gawd, I am old.

          1. Horatio

            Ah, memories. Fapping – successfully – to a 40 yr old wearing granny panties…kids have it so easy these days.

            1. Hyperion

              Yeah, it could take hours.

          2. PapayaSF

            Don’t forget National Geographics.

            1. Hyperion

              Natgeos back then were even more difficult to come by than a pr0n mag. You had to get lucky and be at a garage sale with your mum and spot a stack and say, wow mom, look educational stuff, I want those!

      2. CE

        Lot of room for bowling lanes, too. Hipsters are into bowling now, I’ve heard.

  42. Cytotoxic

    Indian PM Modi is every bit the statist dud Shikhia said he’d be. He wants to ‘revive’ India’s state-owned factories instead of cutting them loose.

    http://in.reuters.com/article/…..2C20141013

    This guy is a disaster. I can’t wait until the next recession kicks the crap out of policies like this.

    1. Hyperion

      I know/have known, quite a few Indians. I work with 2 of them right now. It’s pretty difficult to get an Indian to even talk about politics, even about politics in their own country. They seem pretty disinterested. Now, it’s very easy to get them to talk about their culture and their religion, they seem to revel in those subjects, but not so much with politics. So I’m betting that a lot of the voters there are similar to voters in the United States. They only vote because someone promises free shit or some stance on a social issue.

  43. ISIS comes out pro-slavery:

    ISIS Is Now Bragging About Enslaving Women and Children

    1. Horatio

      Have they locked up Safest Badguy status yet? Really getting bored with Nazi-killing video games/movies/revenge-fantasies/message board trump cards

  44. Jesus H. Christ

    These ISIS folks are so atrocious, at some point they are going to lose, and lose hard. I don’t see why the US needs to be involved, but I would certainly cheer the slaughter of ISIS en masse.

  45. Emmerson Biggins

    When is next GamerGate article coming out?

    I don’t think anything on Reason had made me so happy in a while. That was frikkin awesome.

  46. Suthenboy

    Uh….Climate change is a danger to our military? Yeah, it is, just not in the way Hagel means.

  47. A very merry Columbus Day to one and all!

    I think it is difficult, in hindsight, to recognize how courageous he was.

Please to post comments

Comments are closed.