A.M. Links: Gaza Cease-Fire Collapses, Republicans Promise Border Bill, Ebola Patient Evacuated to U.S.

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Credit: Gage Skidmore / Foter.com / CC BY-SA-2.0
  • An American Ebola patient will be evacuated from West Africa and brought back to the U.S. for treatment. The death toll from the current outbreak now stands above 700, making it the largest Ebola outbreak on record.
  • The U.S. unemployment rate has increased to 6.2 percent.
  • Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg has no plans to retire in the near future. "All I can say, I am still here and likely to remain for a while," the 81-year-old justice declared.
  • "Syfy says its sequel to the horror spoof 'Sharknado' snapped up 3.9 million viewers Wednesday night. The film, officially titled 'Sharknado 2: The Second One,' nearly tripled the 1.37 million viewers who saw last summer's premiere of the original 'Sharknado' film."

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  1. House Republicans says they will remain in Washington until a new border bill has been passed.

    Or until they fall into disarray. Whichever comes first.

    1. “fall into disarray”?

      You mean “remain in disarray”, right?

      1. If they all agreed to stay, they’ve entered arrayness.

    2. Hello.

      Obamnado? No?

      1. Greetings and salutations.

        I’m sure that one of the resident trolls will come along to say that it’s Bushnado.

  2. The cease-fire between Israel and Hamas has broken down.

    Neither shock nor awe at this news.

    1. “We call for a cease fire whenever we need to reload.”

      1. I thought it was just the time needed to swap out the .50 barrels and reload, too.

        1. And American taxpayers get to pay for the reload

          “”””Israel Allowed To Tap U.S. Munitions Cache For Gaza Offensive”””

          http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetw…..-offensive

          1. I’d tap dat cache

          2. Good! I guess you’d rather see our blood spilled than our worthless money spent?

  3. Shocking video shows botched takedown of drunk suspect that left him battered beyond recognition and a jailer out of a job
    Jason Bishop, 38, was left bruised on July 19 after being arrested in a Dallas suburb
    Jailer Darius Porter lost his job after Denton Police examined video
    The force released the surveillance footage in the interests of transparency

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..r-job.html

  4. Kremlin mocks Obama’s masculinity by tweeting picture of him holding a poodle next to Putin petting a leopard
    Russia’s deputy prime minister Dmitry Rogozin uploaded picture to Twitter
    Image captioned ‘We have different values ??and allies’ retweeted 1,000 times
    Mockery comes amid heightened tensions between Russia and the U.S. following the shooting down of Malaysia Airlines flight MH17 in Ukraine

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..opard.html

    1. I fully expect this image to make an appearance on RAW next week.

    2. IS it wrong to want Putin to own Obama in the Propaganda war?

      1. It increases the likelihood of America opting for a tough guy as the next President, though, who can go blow for blow with Putin. Essentially, Hillary.

        1. Madame Reset? The same woman who has Obama taint all over her? Given the US electorate, you could right.

          1. What difference at this point does it make?

  5. Ways I don’t want to die part 343234:

    Car crashes into bee-infested abandoned house; St. Charles driver dies as rescuers hindered by swarm

    Pfau said people nearby saw the crash and rushed to help the driver, but were driven back by swarms of bees, released when the car struck the home.

    “The house, we’re being told, has not been occupied for many years,” he said. “There were just large swarms of bees within the home. It was so infested, they couldn’t get to him.”

    Pfau said those attempting to help the man then attached a tow strap to the vehicle and pulled it away from the home as Tri-Township firefighters and Saginaw County Sheriff deputies rushed to the scene.

    1. “When yo number bee up ….”

      1. -1 for ungentlemanly conduct

    2. Commenters continue to drone on about this story.

    3. So the mystery of Colony Collapse Disorder is solved…they were all hiding in StC

    4. But were the bees ok?

    5. Note the locals actually getting something done while our sainted first responders flop around pointlessly.

    6. They killed the bees? Dumbasses. Bees are valuable right now and they could have relocated the hives.

      http://imgur.com/gallery/CxqYU

  6. “All I can say, I am still here and likely to remain for a while,” the 81-year-old justice declared.

    Liberal blog reports Ginsberg is only capable of saying 14 distinct words and must be replaced on the court.

    1. Are there more words than that actually needed in progtardia?

      1. Are there more words than that actually needed in progtardia?

        racist; teabagger; foxnews (one word); kochs; bush; nra; and racists (collective)…that’s 7.

        1. Corporations, Kochs, single payer

        2. livingwage; fairshare

          I’m making them each one word because

    2. Regardless, they couldn’t possible replace her with someone more liberal unless they appoint Warren.

    3. They could bribe/knock her off, and appoint Holden through some type of executive order while Congress is out of session.

  7. Study: Hundreds of rules passed by Obama administration are technically illegal
    …Under a 1996 statute, most federal rules are supposed to be reported to the House and Senate in paper form and to the Government Accountability Office electronically. But since the start of 2012, that hasn’t happened for many of the regulations put out by the Obama administration, either because of bureaucratic oversight or because they were considered too minor to be reported.

    Failing to report many of the rules is a “technical violation” of the statute, “and the law says they can’t take effect,” according to Robert Cramer, the GAO’s managing associate general counsel.

    But there’s another catch: Congress also barred such rules from judicial review. Two federal appeals courts and two district courts have upheld this principle even when the regulation in question was not submitted to Congress as required. Since Congress cannot pass a resolution of disapproval for a rule until it receives it, this means neither lawmakers nor the courts can step in and demand that agencies submit the required paperwork….

      1. ….In a jealous rage, that he had not written this.

      2. Nah, I’d bet he would have shrugged his shoulders and thought “How could I present this as plausible?”

    1. Congress also barred such rules from judicial review.

      What the hell?

      1. And note that the courts are willing to emasculate themselves for MOAR STATE.

        1. The courts should just tell congress to go fuck itself, we are a separate but equal branch of government.

          1. The courts ruled that Congress had the power to state that any rules not reported as Congress specified were invalid. So the courts agree that it doesn’t matter what rule was made, it is invalid and cannot be enforced, even if it is keeping with the direction of the statute.

            1. So, when you go to court and your defense is that the rule is illegal, the court still has to enforce it, because it is barred from agreeing, as that would be “judicial review”?

          2. How many divisions does the judicial branch have?

            1. How many divisions does the judicial branch have?

              Well, there is the division between the liberals and the conservatives…

              *ducks

      2. It was a TYPO!!

      3. Rule of law, how does it work?

          1. How would we know? We haven’t tried it in years.

      4. Article III, Section 2:

        In all the other cases before mentioned, the Supreme Court shall have appellate jurisdiction, both as to law and fact, with such exceptions, and under such regulations as the Congress shall make.

        So it’s incredibly stupid, but it is constitutional.

    2. Stupid old rules written back before POTUS had a pen and a phone…

    3. Technically illegal is the best kind of illegal, amirite?

  8. Female secret service agents hate being assigned to Joe Biden because of his love of SKINNY DIPPING – and consider him the second worst assignment… after Hillary, claims book
    New book by best-selling author purports to tell behind the scenes stories of the First and Second families
    Author Ronald Kessler uses anonymous sources in his books
    Hillary Clinton spokesman calls book ‘trashy nonsense’

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..llary.html

    1. So what they’re saying is, they’d rahter be exposed to little joe than deal with Shrillary’s bullshit?

      1. ‘Little Joe’, and his balls, ‘Hoss’ and ‘Adam’.

      2. So what they’re saying is, they’d rahter be exposed to little joe than deal with Shrillary’s bullshit big Rodham?

        FTFY.

        1. Hillary “Rod ‘Em” Clinton

    2. So they’ve never seen a penis before. Big whoop.

    3. Where is the feminist outrage about this powerful man exploiting female underlings.

    4. Female SS Agent: “Its not so much the skinny dipping as the huge grin, direct eye contact, and tiny, throbbing erection I had a problem with.”

    5. I play cards with a KY ex-state trooper who worked the ‘Governor’s Detail’ (SS for the Gov). Governor Clinton came for a state summit.

      Talking to his detail, the troopers said “that Bill is a pretty good guy, but he can’t keep his dick in his pants. But his wife is a Rolling Bitch.”

    6. FTA: “Nick Merrill, a spokesman for Secretary Clinton, told the Washington Examiner… ‘Their behavior should neither be allowed nor enabled, and legitimate media outlets who know with every fiber of their beings that it is completely made up should not get down in the gutter with them.’

      That goddamn freedom of the press again! Will no one save Hillary from these meddlesome scribblers?

  9. Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg has no plans to retire in the near future.

    Moving up the progressives’ list of the most hated justices on the bench.

  10. Dad goes into bathroom and finds CROCODILE in the shower

    An Indian man got a shock when he went to take a shower – and almost stood on a huge crocodile that was hiding in his bathroom.

    Kalpesh Patel, 41, said: “At first I didn’t even know if it was alive, I just stood there staring at it in my bath robe and then suddenly I saw it blink, and I turned round and ran off as fast as I could – slamming the door behind me.”

    He said when he had told his wife and kids not to go in the bathroom because there was a massive crocodile in there, they had not believed him at first.

    1. Well, it’s a known fact that “crocodile” is a euphemism for “turd” in many parts of the subcontinent.

      1. What with all the Indian food, I can totally see this. I’ve had a few, err, “crcodiles” that could eat a puppy after too much curry, myself.

  11. Why are Chinese women taking photographs of their underarm hair? Bizarre ‘competition’ sweeps country’s version of Twitter? despite there being no prize on offer
    Women have been taking to Weibo posting selfies of their underarm hair
    Part of a competition called ‘Girls not plucking their armpit hair’
    Thousands of images have been posted even though contest has no prize
    Said to be challenging social norms and encouraging ‘natural beauty’

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..espite-no-

    prize-offer.html

    1. The folks at Jezebel are probably turned on by this.

      1. Take that, patwiawkey!

    2. what the pluck?

  12. “Syfy says its sequel to the horror spoof ‘Sharknado’ snapped up 3.9 million viewers Wednesday night.

    Irony “sells-out.”

  13. Barmegeddon…

    Makes me glad I hand wrote my bar exam. I bet those were some extra tightly wound exam takers though.

    1. I heard about that. A few friends were taking but I haven’t heard back to see if they were affected. Michigan let the downloads be “late” until the end of Day 2 of the exam.

      1. Im going to a wedding tomorrow. The groom was taking the bar this week.

        Bam. Double Bam.

        1. I guess that one way to celebrate finishing the bar exam. I drank tequila until I redacted redacted redacted redacted redacted redacted redacted

        2. A friend/acquaintance of mine did the same thing, but in reverse order.

        3. That is not a good combo. My worst grades in law school were the semester I got married.

    2. There’s some derp in the comments, like the guy who doesn’t care the “monopoly” is conferred by the government and then proceeds to make a dumb Hobby Lobby-related comment.

      1. Well, it is the ABAJounrnal.

  14. Nice peaches! Greengrocer dresses his fruit in lingerie to boost sales ahead of China’s version of Valentine’s Day
    Businessman Yao Yuan is flogging peaches in miniature lingerie
    Lingerie firm makes knickers, and the fruit is dressed by hand
    Despite price of ?50 for nine peaches, sales are soaring

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..s-Day.html

      1. Eat a Peach!

        1. In the room the women come and go, talking of Michelangelo.

          1. +1 “The Wasteland” reference.

  15. The U.S. unemployment rate has increased to 6.2 percent.

    I blame the polar vortex.

    1. What’s the workforce participation rate?

      1. FOE mixed up his statistics, that WAS the workforce participation rate.

        1. I don’t participate all that much in my job most days.

          1. I ever tell you about the time I had a client tell me to dig a hole “here”, 6x4x6. (I owned a landscaping company and, while rich this person wasn’t the swiftest, her garden fucking rocked though). I said ok. After lunch she comes over and says “can you move the hole over there?” Took me another couple of hours to fill it back in. At the end of the day the following went through my head:
            F = Ma
            W = Fs
            I am tired and dirty. I have been busy all day. And I have done exactly zero work.

            (no pedants here to point out the unit signs)

            1. Sounds like you spent a day a Gahan Wilson cartoon.

  16. “All I can say, I am still here and likely to remain for a while,” the 81-year-old justice declared.

    Good, Ruthie. If that’s really all you can say, perhaps SCOTUS will come to more reasonable decisions.

    1. Good point. This sounds like an implicit confirmation of castle and stand-your-ground laws.

      1. You are on a roll this morning, BT.

        1. Your comment does not appear to be written in an English script. Please comment in English.

          “MOLON LABE, suckahs!”

          (Hey, I tried.)

  17. Just a SPACE stone’s throw away! Rosetta image reveals that it is closer than ever to its icy comet at just 1,200 miles away
    One image shows the coma, which is the dust and gas envelope that grows around its nucleus as the comet moves along its orbit closer to the sun
    Another reveals that the comet is far more irregular in shape than anyone first thought. It has already been named the ‘rubber duck’ in space
    Could make a planned landing on the comet in November more difficult
    Rosetta probe is due to enter orbit on 6 August after ten years of travel

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sci…..-away.html

    1. So it’s linking up with the Rubber Duck?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwaygKjs2fI

  18. House Republicans says they will remain in Washington until a new border bill has been passed.

    They feel safe that the immigration won’t move that far north.

    1. Hmm, Congresscritters make $174k a year, I bet I could find an undocumented alien who could represent me at least as well for a lot less than that.

  19. Underage student who was violently arrested by cops who mistook her case of sparkling water for beer gets $200,000 compensation
    Elizabeth Daly, now 21, and her friend had their car swarmed by state agents after their case of water was mistaken for beer
    Daly had initially sought $40million in damages for a tremor in her right hand, intense anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder and other problems
    The young women had been shopping at a local Virginia grocery store one night in April 2013 for a charity fundraiser the next day

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..rrest.html

    1. Eh, after lawyer’s fees she should at least get a nice year of tuition out of it.

    2. “Daly had initially sought $40million in damages for a tremor in her right hand, intense anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder and other problems.”

      That’s the spirit!

    3. Now, imagine you were at a private firm and you just cost your company $200,000 dollars. Hell, many cops are costing their cities millions of dollars from lawsuits. How long would a person at a private firm last for costing their company so much?

      How often do cops get fired for this bullshit?

      1. Depends on if the private firm is unionized or not.

  20. Milton Friedman’s 7 Most Notable Quotes

    “The most important single central fact about a free market is that no exchange takes place unless both parties benefit.”

    “Most economic fallacies derive from the tendency to assume that there is a fixed pie, that one party can gain only at the expense of another.”

    “A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that puts freedom before equality will get a high degree of both.”

    “When everybody owns something, nobody owns it, and nobody has a direct interest in maintaining or improving its condition. That is why buildings in the Soviet Union?like public housing in the United States?look decrepit within a year or two of their construction?”

    “Concentrated power is not rendered harmless by the good intentions of those who create it.”

    “One of the great mistakes is to judge policies and programs by their intentions rather than their results.”

    “If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in five years there’d be a shortage of sand.”

      1. “Indeed, a major source of objection to a free economy is precisely that it… gives people what they want instead of what a particular group thinks they ought to want. Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself.”

        That’s the tyranny of the market, that people will pay you for what they value and not what you value – no matter how lowbrow their taste and refined yours.

    1. “Most economic fallacies derive from the tendency to assume that there is a fixed pie, that one party can gain only at the expense of another.”

      I’d go farther and say all of them derive from zero sum.

      It is certainly the basis of every single leftist idea about economics ever put forward.

    2. “The most important single central fact about a free market is that no exchange takes place unless both parties benefit.”

      Then I have never seen a free market.

      1. Bear in mind that value is subjective, so the perception of benefit is more important than the reality. A better way to put it is that no transaction takes place unless both parties are mutually agreeable to it.

        1. And why would you agree to a transaction that was worse than doing nothing?

          1. It always felt coerced or explotative.

            1. Then that was the G involved, right?

          2. Your valuation wasn’t accurate or there was misrepresentation (presuming a market free of coercion/interference of other varieties). If the former it still meets the criteria bearing in mind subjective value. You only have to believe that what you are giving up is worth less to you than what you are getting in order for the transaction to proceed.

            1. It was the other way around, PM. I always felt I was getting less than I was giving, but I didn’t have any choice in the matter.

              1. Oh, sorry, it looked like threading had hit the wall on the right where everything muddles together. I thought you’d responded to me not robc.

              2. You “didn’t have any choice” because someone was going to break your thumbs, or because you needed a plumber at 3:00 am on a Sunday and the only guy who would even answer the phone wanted to charge $250 just for coming out?

          3. It is mutually beneficial at the time the transaction is consummated. People certainly may have regrets afterward as they find they wanted what they traded more, or find out new facts only after experience which changes their perspective on the matter.

            In other words, a free market is no guarantee of perpetual happiness, it’s simply a way to reallocate with the least amount of Force. It also allows for more immediate feedback in errors that have been made – the properly interested person making timely adjustments to their wants and needs. Collective methods of allocation have neither the properly set interests to begin with (absent players hiring agents to Force others to act and behave as they think best) nor the ability to feedback changing choices of wants and needs.

            The free market doesn’t promise a rose garden, it should provide access to resources with the least amount of Force.

        2. Though its essential truth is obvious to ordinary people, pathological narcissists are incapable of understanding Uncle Miltie’s aphorism about mutually beneficial exchange.

      2. So, Uncivil, when you go to the grocery store, or the movie theater, or buy shoes, or engage in all the myriad transactions of your day, you never felt better off for having exchanged your money for the goods and services you purchased?

        I find that really hard to believe.

    3. When everybody owns something, nobody owns it, and nobody has a direct interest in maintaining or improving its condition.

      this one is handy for those times when the progs scream about the need to fix our “crumbling infrastructure.”

      1. They’re just going to tell you that they’d rather have our infrastructure owned by the people than by corporations.

    4. “If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in five years there’d be a shortage of sand.”

      That’s a great quote, but it doesn’t seem in the same league as the other six. The others are statements of principles, whereas this one is just a jab.

  21. An American Ebola patient will be evacuated from West Africa and brought back to the U.S. for treatment.

    By U.S. they mean Hawaii, right? I mean, isn’t this the whole reason we stole the islands in the first place?

    1. Well they can’t very well take him to Puerto Rico, he’s liable to come down with something far worse.

    2. I believe they’re bringing him to Georgia.

      1. Stick him in a room with Shreeky?

        1. speaking of shreeky, I haven’t seen his spotty carcass hanging around lately.

    3. My guess is they’ll take him one place then sneak him off to Emory in Atlanta near the CDC so they can more easily make sure the Ebola doesn’t get accidentally released like the smallpox and the anthrax.

      1. Fortunately for me, I’m upwind of Atlanta so I’ll have a chance to flee west toward Mother Abagail’s farm in Hemingford Home.

        1. I’m pretty sure this is how the apocalypse starts. At least I’ll have a good seat for it.

    4. Guam? or some other possession in the Pacific?

      1. provided Guam hasn’t capsized yet.

        /Hank Johnson’s office

    5. Plum Island.

      1. Under swat team surveillance, of course.

  22. So, has it been decided that On the Road to Mandalay is another Tulpa sock?

    Just curious.

    1. When the boot of authority is on his tongue, he actually cares whether it is the right boot or the left.

    2. I’m fairly certain of it

  23. 100 chickens discovered in small SUV during Grand Island traffic stop

    When the officer approached the 2004 Nissan SUV to visit with the driver, he noticed “a couple of chickens sitting on the back seat,” Edwards said.
    The birds had apparently escaped from a “makeshift cage” in the back of the vehicle, he said.
    About 50 of the chickens in the cage were dead, he said.
    The driver has been charged with second-offense driving under the influence and second-offense driving during suspension. A woman riding in the vehicle was released, Edwards said.

      1. The other Giraffe, however, managed to duck.

      2. Am I cruel for laughing at this?

        1. I hope not, but it might be a New York derangement.

      3. Hangover 3 is now a documentary. Thank you world.

      4. I watched a documentary on transporting giraffes once. I was struck at the time by how logistically difficult it is, since they have to stand upright.

    1. he noticed “a couple of chickens sitting on the back seat,”

      If they didn’t have their seatbelts on, he missed another ticket.

  24. To Lift Sales, G.M. Turns to Discounts

    But since G.M.’s safety crisis began to mount in the spring, the automaker has piled on cash incentives and cheap lease deals to invigorate sales of its passenger cars, particularly the smaller models, joining what some of its competitors have been doing as well.

    G.M.’s overall sales in the United States have held up well despite the overwhelmingly negative attention the company has drawn for failing to recall millions of defective small cars for more than a decade.

    In the first six months of the year, G.M.’s sales rose 2.5 percent, compared with the industrywide increase of 4.3 percent. On Friday, automakers will announce sales figures for July.

    1. Can’t they just keep selling to police departments?

    2. Here’s an idea: Make cars people want to drive.

      Or go out of business like you should have years ago. Assholes.

    3. Sure, we’re taking a loss on each one, but we’ll make it up on volume.

      1. Once they’re in bad enough shape, they’ll just get another Obama loan.

    4. I’d be surprised if there wasn’t some channel-stuffing going on, too.

      Is that sales increase number of units moved, or is that sales revenue? They could easily have increased units by that much, but lost money as well.

  25. Land for gas: Merkel and Putin discussed secret deal could end Ukraine crisis

    Sources close to the secret negotiations claim that the first part of the stabilisation plan requires Russia to withdraw its financial and military support for the various pro-separatist groups operating in eastern Ukraine. As part of any such agreement, the region would be allowed some devolved powers.

    At the same time, the Ukrainian President would agree not to apply to join Nato. In return, President Putin would not seek to block or interfere with the Ukraine’s new trade relations with the European Union under a pact signed a few weeks ago.

    Second, the Ukraine would be offered a new long-term agreement with Russia’s Gazprom, the giant gas supplier, for future gas supplies and pricing. At present, there is no gas deal in place; Ukraine’s gas supplies are running low and are likely to run out before this winter, which would spell economic and social ruin for the country.

    1. Why is Putin negotiating with Merkel, rather than actual Ukrainians?

      1. See also: Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact.

      2. Ukraine is weak!

  26. Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg has no plans to retire in the near future. “All I can say, I am still here and likely to remain for a while,” the 81-year-old justice declared.

    She’s holding out for President Paul to name her replacement. Obama is likely to nominate Tom Steyer’s wife.

    1. If I were RBG, I’d hire a food-taster. Just sayin’.

    2. I think its too late to push another SCOTUS nomination through the Senate before the elections, anyway.

  27. Silent film tops documentary poll

    A 1929 silent film has been voted the greatest ever documentary in a poll of some 300 film-makers and critics.

    I’m sure someone around here is a movie buff.

    1. Are there any movie bloggers here?

    2. Was it a multiple-choice poll?

  28. Has anyone heard from Killazontherun lately?

    1. I think he made a name change, but to what, I cannot recall.

  29. Advocates Shun ‘Pro-Choice’ to Expand Message

    That shift might seem surprising in this political season, when there has been a renewed focus on reproductive issues like access to abortion and birth control. Yet advocates say that the term pro-choice, which has for so long been closely identified with abortion, does not reflect the range of women’s health and economic issues now being debated.

    Nor, they add, does it speak to a new generation of young women, who tell pollsters that they reject political labels ? not least one that dates back four decades, to the Supreme Court’s Roe v. Wade decision that established a constitutional right to abortion.

    “The labels we’ve always used about pro-choice and pro-life ? they’re outdated and they don’t mean anything,” said Janet Colm, 62, president of Planned Parenthood Action Fund of Central North Carolina, as she prepared to take several younger women to a summer protest at the legislature in Raleigh. “I used to be a one-issue voter” ? pro-choice ? “but I think most younger people today aren’t.”

    1. That’s because abortion is the only case in which they’re “pro-choice”. And I’m being generous.

    2. Among the findings, according to several people familiar with them: Many young women, when asked whether they were pro-choice or pro-life, said pro-life. Yet they supported the Roe ruling. Explaining the contradiction, Ms. Laguens said these self-described pro-life voters were “talking about their personal decision-making, for themselves, and not about what they want to push on others.”

      What Ted said – “pro-choice” does not include the right to choose not to pay for other people’s choices or to choose to disagree with the pro-choice side.

    3. Ted nailed it. Choice is the last thing they’re in favor of.

  30. Feds: Man Admitted Putting Needles In Store Meat ‘Just For The Hell Of It’

    A 68-year-old Illinois man was jailed without bond Thursday after being accused by federal prosecutors of inserting sewing needles into a packaged meat “just for the hell of it” at a grocery store in his hometown for more than a year.

    The criminal complaint filed Wednesday against Ronald Avers said one buyer of boneless chuck roast at the Shop `n Save store in Belleville just east of St. Louis later bit into one of the needles, and a needle slipped into a steak stuck another customer.

    And we felt like stringing you up – just for the hell of it.

    1. A 68-year-old Illinois man…

      That guy… POS. Throw the book at him. fuckhead.

      1. Sorry, we don’t have time to go after this guy, someone might have some pot.

        /the cops

    2. Were they assault needles? If so, he should get extra time.

    3. Why couldn’t he just stick needles into himself, like a normal sicko?

  31. Facing tougher sanctions over Ukraine, Russia said yesterday it … is investigating McDonald’s Corp. (MCD) cheese for safety.

    *** snort ***

    “Cheese”.

    However, Russia has apparently chickened out on banning imports of eyes from the U.S.

      1. The term is “Biogenic Thermoplastic”.

        1. It’s just glue used to hold the bun to the ‘meat’.

          1. That’s important, because if you actually lift up the bun and look inside….

            It’s not Warty level scary, but it’s scary.

  32. Taiwan gas blasts in Kaohsiung kill at least 25

    A series of gas explosions in the southern Taiwanese city of Kaohsiung has killed 25 people and injured 267 others, officials say

    .

    Images from Kaohsiung in southern Taiwan where a series of gas blasts has killed more than 20 people and injured about 270.

    1. Yes, there are Taco Bells in Taiwan.

      Purely a coincidence, I’m sure.

  33. Eric Cantor says he’ll leave Congress August 18

    Departing House Majority Leader Eric Cantor said he will quit Congress altogether in August, ending a once-promising political career in a bid to give his successor a chance for an early turn in office.

    Cantor told the Richmond Times-Dispatch he will resign his seat in the House of Representatives effective Aug. 18.

    “I want to make sure that the constituents in the 7th District will have a voice in what will be a very consequential lame-duck session,” he told the newspaper in a story published late Thursday.

    1. I suspect he’ll just go and make ridiculously large Wall St $$$.

      On the other hand, if he’s been bitten by the political bug maybe he’ll try to get elected Governor in a few years? I don’t think it would work but politicians have been known to be deluded…

  34. Since the 100 year anniversary of the start of WWI was so recent, a poet.

    The diaries of war poet Siegfried Sassoon are being published online for the first time.

    In pictures: World War One battlefields 100 years on

    1. Sassoon’s Memoirs of an Infantry Officer is worth reading. Our local library – to my surprise – had a copy.

      1. Also — Good-Bye to All That, by Robert Graves.

    2. Holy shit. You can just walk around and find ammo clips and helmets? I guess people don’t take them out of respect or something?

  35. The document, released Thursday by the CIA, is a summary of an internal CIA investigation that prompted CIA Director John Brennan to abandon his defiant posture in the matter and apologize to Senate Intelligence Committee leaders.

    The apology was a turnabout for the CIA director, who until this week had dismissed the notion that the CIA did anything wrong.

    Serious question: When did this kind of bullshit “apology” — instead of resigning or, better yet, literally falling on one’s sword — become “acceptable”?

    1. I accept all of the blame, but none of the responsibility

      1. As I recall, Janet Reno accepted full responsibility for Waco. Apparently the whole thing was just a big misunderstanding since no prosecutors ever attempted to file charges against her based on her public confession of guilt.

    2. Since it was discovered that voters have short memories.

    1. Somehow I don’t think I want to look.

      1. They’re fully clothed.

        1. THAT DOESN’T HELP!!!!

    2. So, to be a “Real Woman” you have to be moderately overweight-morbidly obese, somewhat dykish, not wear your hair in your natural color and glasses?

      1. How many lesbians do you know?

        1. Are you saying that Orange is the New Black lied to me?

        2. There was nobody dressed like a lumberjack, and not nearly enough mullet.

        3. I had a streak in college where every woman I hit on for 2 months turned out to be a lesbian. None fit that description.

          My favorite instance was when it turned out that our mutual friend knew the girl was a lesbian, and when I asked her why she didn’t mention it to me at some point during the evening she said “I thought you knew! She’s wearing random nail polish!”

          1. It is weird. My wife has a friend who has 4 or 5 very attractive lesbian friends, including a unicorn — a couple where both women are very attractive.

            1. But that’s not to say that the stereotypes are not strongly indicative.

              1. It’s certainly a trend, but I think we amplify it with the “all toupees are bad: I’ve never seen a passable toupee” thinking.

          2. A lot of women in college are pretend-lesbian for awhile. You probably just had bad timing.

          3. Random should say “rainbow”. Makes so much more sense (except for the part where my friend thought I would be looking at a girl’s nails).

          4. “I had a streak in college where every woman I hit on for 2 months turned out to be a lesbian. ”

            Maybe it was the new cologne?

  36. A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that puts freedom before equality will get a high degree of both.”

    Uh-oh.

  37. Woman sticks hand in lion’s cage in attempt to pet the animal, loses part of a finger in the process. Guess what she’s doing now:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..-lion.html

    1. Ima say … “Being sued for poisoning an animal.”

      1. *** clicks link ***

        Damn it!

  38. Just because there is an ebola outbreak doesn’t mean it makes sense to quarantine alt-text.

  39. Damn it!

    Yup.

    Remember the three teenage boys who were throwing shit at the Siberian tiger at the San Francisco zoo a few years ago? The tiger got pissed, jumped out of its enclosure, and killed one of the boys on the spot. While the tiger was busy feeding, the other two fled to the other side of the zoo. The tiger tracked them there and commenced to mauling them before it was shot by police. Those boys received something like a million bucks in settlement money.

    1. Oops, this was meant to be in response to Rich @ 10:40, re: the lion attack.

    2. Fuck. Why’d they have to shoot that tiger? Should have given him a lifetime of steak dinners.

      1. Agreed. Siberian tigers are beautiful animals. For one to have to be shot because it responded instinctively to being taunted is a crying shame. I’m just glad it was able to get some killing done before it died. That’s a privilege that’s rarely afforded to captive tigers.

    3. So you don’t have a problem with a zoo where apparently the only thing keeping the animals in the cages is a lack of motivation?

      1. So you don’t have a problem with a zoo where apparently the only thing keeping the animals in the cages is a lack of motivation?

        Absolutely I think enclosures that house dangerous animals should be built to ensure there’s no possibility of escape. But at the same time, I’m also okay with a trio of drunken idiots being mauled by the animal they were taunting.

        I’m bothered by the fact that a beautiful animal like that had to die, and I’m bothered that the surviving punks that instigated the attack were able to profit from it.

        1. While I admit the irony involved amuses me, being a dick is not really something that warrants summary execution, so I’m not okay with it.

          1. While I admit the irony involved amuses me, being a dick is not really something that warrants summary execution, so I’m not okay with it.

            It’s not an “execution” in any sense of the word. An animal with no moral agency doing the only thing it knows how to do isn’t making some sort of value judgement.

            For me, not only is the irony here amusing, I admire the tiger for what it was able to do.

          2. Sorry. Taunt a tiger, and you can’t complain about whatever happens next.

          3. *being a dick is not really something that warrants summary execution*

            Oh, but it should.

            1. If it did, 75% of the regular commenters here would be dead.

  40. So you don’t have a problem with a zoo where apparently the only thing keeping the animals in the cages is a lack of motivation?

    No. I have an extra ticket to the zoo I can’t use. Would you like it? I’ll pack you a bacon sandwich for lunch.

    The tiger got pissed, jumped out of its enclosure, and killed one of the boys on the spot.

    I used to watch my one year old cat *run* up my neighbor’s six foot tall cedar privacy fence. As I recall, the walls of that enclosure were rough stone. It was not surprising to me in the least that the tiger got out when he decided the effort was worth it.

    1. It was not surprising to me in the least that the tiger got out when he decided the effort was worth it.

      Indeed, hence the lawsuit; it was so not surprising that it was negligent to use it as a method of keeping a tiger separated from the public.

      1. Negligence goes to reasonableness. Just because the tiger got out doesn’t mean the enclosure wasn’t reasonably secure.

        Now, there may be some kind of strict liability thing for dangerous animals, so negligence may not apply.

      2. Negligence goes to reasonableness. Just because the tiger got out doesn’t mean the enclosure wasn’t reasonably secure.

        Now, there may be some kind of strict liability thing for dangerous animals, so negligence may not apply.

        1. Now, there may be some kind of strict liability thing for dangerous animals, so negligence may not apply.

          As I recall, the USDA fined the zoo a couple grand for having an enclosure that wasn’t up to recommended specs. If it hadn’t been for the lawsuits from the dead kid’s family and the survivors, the zoo would’ve gotten off with a slap on the wrist.

  41. it was negligent to use it as a method of keeping a tiger separated from the public.

    The zoo exercised what had proved to be a reasonable and effective degree of caution for decades. The kid who got eaten committed suicide.

    If you come to my house and stick my gun in your mouth and pull the trigger, am I a murderer?

    1. If you come to my house and stick my gun in your mouth and pull the trigger, am I a murderer?

      No, but my family might try to sue you for “negligence” or whatever. Okay, well my family wouldn’t, but you get the idea. And if it hadn’t been for the inevitable lawsuits (which were settled), the zoo would’ve gotten off with a token fine.

      1. Maybe if more stupid people got killed doing stupid things, there’d be less stupid people PLUS the remaining stupid people might stop doing certain stupid things.

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