White House

Fiscal End-Times: White House Not Able to Fix Up Bowling Alley

The White House has opted not to renovate its bowling alley after all-a tell-tale sign of the moral decay of our once great nation.

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Bowling
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The White House has opted not to renovate its bowling alley after all—a tell-tale sign of the moral decay of our once great nation.

The bowling alley, which is reportedly nigh unusable (unbowlable?) due to its shamefully "chipped lanes and worn-out shoes," has not been fixed up in 15 years. Post-9/11 America has never had a respectable White House bowling alley. Now it never will.

Media scrutiny (read: sabotage) of the proposal to spend money on a fancier bowling alley—at a time when government purports to be cutting back—ultimately doomed the renovation, according to The Washington Times.

Without a better alley, how will President Obama improve his abysmal bowling game? Answer: he won't. Woe to the American people.