A.M. Links: Boehner Plans to Sue Obama, Snowden Reveals More NSA Spying, Legal Pot Arrives in Washington


Credit: C-Span

Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-Ohio) penned an op-ed explaining why the House will file a lawsuit against President Barack Obama over "the President's flippant dismissal of the Constitution."

The latest release of NSA files by Edward Snowden reveals the "extent to which ordinary Web users are caught in the net."

Washington state will issue its first licenses for retail marijuana shops today.

The United States has surpassed Saudi Arabia to become the world's biggest oil producer.

Israel has made several arrests in connection with the murder of a 16-year-old Palestinian.

Health officials have confirmed a case of anthrax in a North Dakota beef cow.

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  1. The latest release of NSA files by Edward Snowden reveals the “extent to which ordinary Web users are caught in the net.”

    Oh, Snowden, you traitorous scamp!

    1. Hello.

      1. Rufus, this is why Canucks can’t have nice UFO’s


        1. Did he say ‘I sawed them?’

          Too funny.

          Son of a dick.

          1. I sawed them

            Wooden UFOs?

  2. Health officials have confirmed a case of anthrax in a North Dakota beef cow.

    Bovine terrorists are behind it.


  3. Controversial Nebraska parade float called racist for featuring the ‘Obama Presidential Library’ sign on an outhouse
    Nebrasks Democrats denounce the float as highly offensive
    Float was entered in Norfolk’s annual Independence Day parade
    Event organizers defend it as political cartoon not meant to be offensive


    1. HuffTards were going berserk at the racism behind it. When asked to explain what is racist, I just got called a faux News watcher and a closet racist myself.

      Of course I never got an explanation how sati ting the current president is by definition racist while doing the same to every other sitting president was just dandy.

      1. Of course I never got an explanation how sati ting the current president is by definition racist while doing the same to every other sitting president was just dandy.

        Anything imperfectly adulatory of the Obamessiah is by definition racist. Now go back to watching Pox News.

    2. The term “racist” officially lost all meaning when we were told that saying goodbye in Spanish is racist. The second-to-last nail in the coffin was when Donald Sterling was presented as the MOST RACIST MAN IN THE WORLD, after he gave his black girlfriend a Lamborghini and asked her not to publicly flaunt her sexual conquests. Accusations of racism now have as much weight as calling someone retarded.

  4. Any excuse! Emmy Rossum drags out 4th of July celebrations… as she marks day the bikini was invented by posing in a two-piece

    I wish I had Showtime.

  5. It looks like the worse air disaster ever – but luckily this was just the scene when a train carrying Boeing 737 fuselages derailed
    Crews to work on Sunday to remove the Boeing 737 fuselages that fell into the Clark Fork River, Montana on Thursday
    Nineteen railway cars derailed and sent three fuselages hurtling into the river
    No one was injured and the cause of the accident is under investigation


    1. Lefties, please explain to me how the Keystone Pipeline is going to be more dangerous than the current way we transport oil again.

      1. Why? everyone knows the arguments: tar sands oil is icky, koch brothers, climate change and displays of cognitive dissonance. Get with the program, I’m surprised it hasn’t come up since you’ve been in Alexandria.

      2. Well, if we stop Keystone than kindly, old Grandpa Warren will be in charge of transporting the oil. This type of thing would never happen on his trains. Why, he’s so right-thinking!

        Three Boeing 737 fuselages lie on an embankment on the Clark Fork River after a BNSF Railway Co train derailed Thursday near Rivulet, Montana

        Ah, shit.

      3. Sometime last year I heard a news report on the CBC about a study finding that transport by pipeline was safer than transport by rail. The CBC got a soundbite from some spokesman from Greenpeace or a similar organization saying the real problem was our dependence on oil.

        Fuck state broadcasters.

        1. since listening to NPR I know understand the official position to be that while it won’t make a difference in the fight against carbon, if we curtail our emmissions, it will set an example for other countries to follow and give us currency for allowing a global dialogue to take place. These people are parodies of themselves.

          1. I heard that too. They were saying that was what American exceptionalism means. There really is no concept out there that they can’t turn on its head. What once meant the innovation that is unleashed when people are free from government coercion now means other governments coercing their people to emulate how our government coerces us.

        2. You listen to the CBC more than I do.

          Here’s my card. I can help.

          1. the first step is the hardest

        3. There have already been some significant spills from trains carrying oil that I believe would have gone through Keystone.

          Forget it, Ted. Its Greenietown. Feelz, not facts.

      4. They’d rather just not transport it at all.

    2. Lewis and Clark could never have predicted this.

  6. Guy throws Barbie bike from balcony at cops, gets charged with FOUR counts of attempted murder…

    “Four NYPD cops were walloped by a child’s Barbie bike”…

    really, all 4 got hit at once?

    “One officer suffered a gash to his head that required six staples and a stitch. Three others suffered a concussion, bruising to the head and a cut forearm, respectively.”…

    bruising and a cut?

    Police Union president: “”There’s a perception that the mayor is soft on crime. The perps’ perception is that the cops are backing down.”

    Mullins said last year’s federal-court ruling against stop-and-frisk and the City Council’s passage of a law that makes it easier for people to sue cops over alleged racial profiling is hurting the police.
    “They’ve made the police the bad guy,” he said.

    1. I think the police made themselves the bad guys.

    2. Cops are so convinced of their righteousness that they will never ever figure out that they made themselves into the bad guys.

    3. No, the *cops* have made the cops the “bad guy” in most cases.

  7. Bella Thorne poses in bikini as she larks around on a sailboat during Mexican holiday

    Youth is wasted on the young.

    1. Jailbait.

      1. 16 is legal in the majority of US states.

  8. Here is my shocked face: the World Cup has not resulted in an economic benefit to Brazil. Foreign tourism has remained flat at 600,000 visitors as Cup fans supplant normal tourists. Brazilian airlines are transporting fewer passengers than they did one year ago. Business productivity has reduced “as much as 30%,” while schools remain closed and parents have to stay home with their kids or pay for babysitters. And, a modification of normal spending rules governing Brazilian cities has caused municipal deficit spending to soar in towns hosting games.

    If only someone, somewhere, had ever researched this sort of thing and crunched the numbers, maybe such things could be avoided!

    1. Didn’t somebody say something once about insanity and doing the same thing over and over again?

      I guess it never got translated into Portuguese.

      1. The problem is that in Brazil, no matter what you do repetitively, it is pretty much always sexy.

    2. There’s a slight chance that I may visit Brazil in any given year.

      There is a zero percent chance that I will visit a country while they are hosting the World Cup.

      1. In Europe it’s generally okay. I have buddies who were at Italia ’90, Germany ’06 and I went to USA ’94. All awesome.

        1. I lived in Orlando in ’94. My buddy and I partied with a few of the Irish fans. Good times.

    3. Meanwhile, FIFA is making out like bandits.

      FIFA to Make $4 Billion in Revenue

    4. Anytime people die for a sporting event automatically dismisses any potential or claims of ‘success.

      Then again, we kinda knew this was going to happen. They level of corruption and incompetence in Brazil was stupendous.

      1. Omelette, eggs, etc.

      2. I guess that’s why the IOC has contingency plans on place to move the 2016 summer games to London. And it’s looking more and more like that may actually come to pass. Their preparations for those games are so far behind schedule that they’re being called the worst ever by quite a few people involved in the analysis for the IOC.

        Now that would be some funny shit.

        1. You mean they might get two uses out of an olympic facility instead of the traditional one?

          1. Oh, no. They’ll tear down the old facilities and build brand new ones.

        2. As long as they do a Brazilian opening ceremonies I think this would be way cool.

        3. London should totally hold the IOC’s balls to the fire in that deal. Squeeze them for whatever losses they took last time. Although I bet the locals would be groaning if they had to put up with all that again.

        4. Worse than Montreal is impressive.

          Have they finished the Olympic stadium yet? Its only 38 years late at this point.

          Fucking 3rd world canuckistan.

          1. They ‘finished’ it with third rate mafia concrete causing it to fall apart after two Canadian weathers, like all the 60s infrastructure in Montreal.

            1. I counted it falling apart in the 90s as “not finished”.

              As Bill James said, did they know the big chunk was going to fall off when no one was around? Not that anyone was around even during Expos games.

          2. We finished paying for it in the early 2000s.

    5. Getting a visa to visit Brazil was one of the more difficult exercises in navigating bureaucracy I’ve ever encountered.

    6. Don’t worry. They’ll make it all back with the Olympics.

  9. Maureen Dowd: Who Do We Think We Are?

    blah blah blah… and then this nugget:

    David Axelrod, the president’s Pygmalion, mused: “Reagan significantly changed the trajectory of the country for better and worse. But he restored a sense of clarity. Bush and Cheney were black and white, and after them, Americans wanted someone smart enough to get the nuances and deal with complexities. Now I think people are tired of complexity and they’re hungering for clarity, a simpler time. But that’s going to be hard to restore in the world today.”

    1. I still can’t believe someone pays her for this rubbish. Oh, the NYT.

  10. Health officials have confirmed a case of anthrax in a North Dakota beef cow.

    Well, test the rest of the herd. Anthrax is a known bovine disease and only a problem if it actually goes anywhere.

  11. Illegal Bitcoin trading ring busted by French cops


    1. I don’t understand what made it illegal. Nowhere in the article do they explain it.

      1. They didn’t pay their protection monies I’d guess.

      2. All together now:


    2. Let’s try that concept out:

      “Illegal Bitcoin trading ring”
      “Illegal drug trading ring”
      “Illegal alcohol trading ring”
      “Illegal car trading ring”
      “Illegal fresh milk trading ring”
      “Illegal bread trading ring”

      1. You forgot:

        “Illegal ring trading ring”

        1. Damn your quick fingers! 😎

      2. “Illegal ring trading ring”

    1. Is this why there aren’t any libertarian women?

    2. Wasn’t there a Sandra Bullock movie about this?

      1. Speed?

        1. I think it was called “The Bus That Couldn’t Go Slow”.

          1. The Blind Side?

      2. “The Net”? Please tell me it was “The Net”!

        1. No, it was Miss Congeniality.

        2. “The Net”? Please tell me it was “The Net”!

          I believe that was it.

          You win one free showing of The Preppie Murder!

    3. This is unusual in Australia, but not so in China. A whole lot of illegal births went unrecorded, and now Chinese adults cannot get legal papers. There’s a whole “identity sharing” industry over there. Legal peasants in the interior essentially share their official identity with an illegally born Chinese. The peasant doesn’t need a drivers license or a passport, but the illegal does. Of course, brokers and bureaucrats get most of cash in the transaction.

      1. Whoa…that is like out of some dystopian Sci-Fi from the 1960s.

      2. So what happens when one of these dies and the demise gets recorded?

        1. Binders full of corpses..

  12. Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-Ohio) penned an op-ed explaining why the House will file a lawsuit against President Barack Obama over “the President’s flippant dismissal of the Constitution.”

    The best scholars scorn the subject of their scholarship.

    1. Yeah, I’m still trying to figure out given that accusation how Boehner has any standing. I’m pretty sure even his spray tan defies some clause in the Constitution.

  13. A young black male wearing a red hoodie takes a shot at a couple of officers with a BB gun.. An hour later, a young black male wearing a red hoodie is arrested in the same neighborhood.

    On the accused’s side, evidence includes DNA evidence (DNA on the BB gun that didn’t belong to the kid), multiple alibi witnesses, school attendance records, and a totally clean arrest record (well, before this).

    Against the accused, you have the word of the two officers who say he was the guy.

    You get two guesses as to what the judge found, and the first one doesn’t count.

    1. guilty of being the wrong color.

      1. They convicted the Hoodie for being red?

        1. No the BB gun, if it had been bright pink this wouldn’t have occurred, It’s really the Manufacturers fault.

    2. Police alleged that Watkins was the young man in a red hooded sweatshirt who, two officers say, on Jan. 13 pointed a rifle at them and then fled, igniting a wild pursuit that ended with a police detective firing three shots and his partner crashing their unmarked car.

      Old Cop plays Dirty Harry, fails miserably, makes up story to cover his ass.

    3. Read the chronology of events. The cop fired three shots before they even conclusively determined there was a bb gun under the coat. They caused a serious accident where the driver of a vehicle collapsed and they destroyed a lot of property in the process.

      All because they thought they saw a gun barrel sticking out of a coat.

      But on the bright side, at least they didn’t drop a bomb on the kid’s house. So I have to give Philly cops a little bit of credit for improving their tactics.

      1. And if they had murdered the kid, they would have just claimed they got the right guy and he ditched the gun somewhere.

      2. But on the bright side, at least they didn’t drop a bomb on the kid’s house.

        They’ve moved forward, haven’t they?

        1. *narrows gaze*

          Don’t think I didn’t see what you did there…

    4. Philly. Of course it is.

  14. Rob Ford: I’ve used nearly all drugs, says Toronto mayor

    He is seeking re-election in October, saying it is up to voters whether he remains mayor.

    Mr Ford told broadcaster CBC his use of drugs precedes his time as mayor and ran the “full gamut”.

    He later told CP24 he had never used heroin, but had used marijuana and hallucinogenic mushrooms in addition to crack.

    When asked by the Toronto broadcaster if he would quit if he used drugs again, he stressed he would be receiving treatment “for the rest of my life” and was taking it one day at a time.

    1. Now he’s just bragging.

    2. “I’ve used nearly all drugs…”

      So that explains the shortages in Toronto!

      1. “Drink Canada Dry — Visit Montreal This Summer!”

      2. heh heh, Ford is the gift that keeps on giving.

        1. Yet, I still have a higher opinion of him than the officholders here in New York.

          1. The sad thing is, there are several places in the US that do worse for their elected officials.

    3. He later told CP24 he had never used heroin

      WHAT?? You get right back into that opium den young man and don’t you dare come out until you’ve chased the dragon from here to next week!

      1. No kidding. Pot, mushrooms, and crack is not “all drugs”, it’s what I call “Tuesday afternoon”. Heck, I’ve snorted prescription meds, popped Percocet, smoked Salvia, dropped acid, eaten Morning Glory seeds, drank Absinthe, eaten Vicodin while drinking, smoked some research chemical a friend got off the internet, snorted coke, probably other stuff I can’t remember, (and I’ve used pot, mushrooms and crack), and I wouldn’t consider that I’ve done ALL drugs.

    4. Alcohol, Nicotine, Marijuana, PCP, Ecstasy, Cocaine (snorted), Valium, Xanax, Flexaril, Dexadrine, Adderall, Ritalin, Phentermine, Shrooms, LSD, Peyote, opiates in pill-form (IV use only in a medical setting), Freon and some half-hearted glue sniffing.

      1. You can’t fool me, that’s a QOTSA song

        1. I got close one night, lacking only the Valium.

      2. Booze, nicotine, caffeine, pot, coke (snorted), mushrooms, LSD, ecstasy (I think), opiates (pills only), maybe mescaline?. That’s about it. Coke, ecstasy, opiates, mescaline(?) only once or twice.

        I feel so . . . square.

    5. taking it one day at a time.

      In other words, he hasn’t done any drugs today, but isn’t willing to make any commitments about tomorrow.

    1. As opposed to the cops, who would have taken 200 shots to get two hits.

      1. who would have taken 200 shots to get two hits.

        neither of which would have been the perps

        1. But the perps would’ve been charged with shooting the two people who got hit.

        2. ^THIS

      2. They would have got a lot more than that, just not in the people they were aiming at.

  15. The United States has surpassed Saudi Arabia to become the world’s biggest oil producer.

    How do we make sure Obama gets credit for this achievement?

    1. Send him to the middle east without a security detail?

    2. “If the U.S. didn’t have this energy supply, prices at the pump would be completely unaffordable.” – International Energy Agency official, from the article

      Hillary will be trumpeting this in 2016 – “thanks to Democrats, North Dakota and Texas have been producing oil and reducing gas prices!”

      1. And people in the northeast and west will believe it.

  16. World Cup drunkenness shocks FIFA official

    FIFA’s No. 2 official has said he’s “amazed” by the levels of drunkenness in Brazil’s World Cup stadiums, reviving a debate over whether alcohol sales should have been allowed at matches in the first place.

    In an interview with Brazil’s sports television network SporTV, Jerome Valcke acknowledged Monday that “maybe there were too many people who were drunk” at the matches and pointed to the connection between inebriation and violence.

    1. peak retard will never ever be reached.

    2. You have to get drunk watching the officiating at this WC. Then again, Brazil getting pretty much all the favorable calls so they should be pleased.

      1. The only good thing about the Neymar injury is that he should have been suspended for yellow card accumulation anyway.

        Go Germany!

        1. That ref lost the game inside one minute.

          Brazil appealing Thiago Silva’s yellow is outrageous. They’ve set the tone in each game with aggressive play. There’s no doubt in my mind they know or feel they will get the calls. Even in the Colombia game they came out hard. To me, Colombia just obliged. Brazil is lucky they didn’t have more guys sent off.

          Wrong, WRONG referee to have had in there. Rizzoli or Irmatov or Kuipers shoulda been in there.

          1. If it is a rough game, I betting on the Germans.

          2. Just to add. The appeal is nuts considering how many calls they’ve had gone their way this WC and Neymar’s injury was a function of the ref’s failure to hand out cards and verbally communicate with players. Guy looked autistic out there it was so bad.

      2. They can get two bullshit penalties called against Germany and it isn’t gonna be enough.

        The Krauts are gonna throttle them.

        1. Please don’t jinx the Germans.

        2. No offense, but Germany isn’t throttling anyone. They have been out of form.

          My feeling is the winner is coming from the other bracket.

          Sorry Ted.

          1. Everybody’s been out of form.

            1. That’s true though I think Holland has been the most consistent.

              Plus they haven’t lost yet.

              We’ll see.

            1. Fuck no.

  17. Woman Who Shot Missile Into Car Has Most Florida Name EVER (EVER)

    More crazy names in the comments. Also, a photo that is pure class

    1. I’m extremely traumatized by your linking to Jezebel without a trigger warning. At least use donotlink if you’re going to do that.

    2. +1 Cary Fisher.

      1. You get my Cheez Whiz boy?

        1. They represent the cultural hub of central Florida, and helped make Jerry Springer the smashing success he once was….

    3. Polk County? Sounds about right. Polk is the apotheosis of trash Florida.

  18. Man’s Best Friend…

    Sheriff: Drunk man says dog drove him to the store

    Oconee County Sheriff Sgt. Partain says he responded to a call about a dog locked in a car at a Bell’s Food Store near Butler’s Crossing. The outside temperature registered at 99 degrees and the internal temperature of the car, which was measured with a handheld thermometer, was 123 degrees.

    Partain said a can of gasoline in the vehicle reeked and described the smell as “stifling.”

    The driver of the car, Wesley Mark Terrell, 60, of Creekshore Drive told Partain that his dog drove him to Bell’s to buy some corn. According to the sheriff, Terrell appeared to be highly intoxicated.

      1. Some years ago a guy who was found shagging a dog claimed the dog took advantage of him while he was drunk. All very plausible.

        1. A shagging dog story.

          1. I remember that in one AM Links a couple of years ago someone posted a link and said “Woman getting fucked by a dog”.

            I’m not sure what I expected the link to actually be, but it was not an actual video of a woman having sex with a dog.

            1. It was probably the profile of a scientist that works for the CDC in Atlanta. That dogfucker (and alleged child molester) is still being paid by our tax dollars, by the way.

            2. EDIT: That last sentence may have been unclear. The link was in fact a video of a woman having sex with a dog. It was my expectation that was not that literal.

              1. Some people really will not be warned

                1. This is why we can’t have blink tags.

  19. Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-Ohio) penned an op-ed explaining why the House will file a lawsuit against President Barack Obama over “the President’s flippant dismissal of the Constitution.”

    If by “lawsuit” he means “impeachment” then he might be serious and it’s not just a political stunt. Well, there is one other option: “President Barack Obama” meant “Editor Damon Root” and “the President’s flippant dismissal of the Constitution” meant “the editor’s flippant dismissal of the alt-text.”

  20. 12-Foot Python Trapped In Barbecue Grill By Florida Residents

    Residents in Florida City, Fla., trapped a 12-foot long Burmese python in a barbecue grill on Thursday night.

    Miami-Dade Fire Rescue’s venom unit responded to the call from residents and captured the python at around 10 p.m. last night, according to Arnold Piedrahita Jr., public information officer at Miami-Dade Fire Rescue

    Time to fire up the Barbie

    1. Why didn’t they just roast it?

      1. This is a question Mounty Python’s is asking!

    2. Using a venom unit on a python seems like a waste of resources. Perhaps they mean vermin?

      1. Was the Constriction Unit busy?

        1. They were filling in for the gator unit, which had to be hospitalized.

  21. Boehner’s clever plan: Tie the president up in court so he stays out of mischief.

    1. Worked on Clinton, at least for the economy.

  22. Godzilla laughs at your puny typhoon

    Super typhoon takes aim at Japan, emergency warnings issued

    Japan’s weather agency on Monday issued emergency warnings to urge people in the country’s southern islands to take maximum precautions as a super typhoon described as a “once in decades storm” is set to rake the Okinawa island chain with heavy rain and powerful winds.

    Typhoon Neoguri was already gusting at more than 250 km an hour (150 mph) and may pick up still more power as it moves northwest, growing into an “extremely intense” storm by Tuesday, the Japan Meteorological Agency (JMA) said.

    But it was not expected to be as strong as Typhoon Haiyan, which killed thousands in the Philippines last year.

    1. Global Warming?

    1. I thought that said 98 seconds at first. Which wouldn’t have surprised me at all.

      It’s amazing how often dogs attack officers versus how often they attack non-officers, isn’t it?

      1. That is about 14 dead dogs a day, 365 days a year or over 5,000 per year. That is staggering. Understand, they don’t kill dogs for safety. They kill dogs to terrorize people.

        1. They would murder children if they could get away with it.

          1. Who says they wouldn’t?

          2. They sometimes do. They killed that little girl in Detroit and then they burned that baby nearly to death in Georgia. I am pretty sure no one was ever charged in either of those cases.

            1. I mean deliberately. As in *BLAM* “Do I have your attention now?”

              1. They only didn’t do those things accidentally if you believe them. I guess it could be worse. They could no even have to lie and just say “of course we shot the baby, officer safety”.

    2. They should stop resuscitating the poor thing.

      1. +1 resurrection gauntlet

  23. zomg – self defense!

    Authorities: Military member with concealed carry permit shoots attacker

    Mickiel, 22, went into the residence, returned with a gun and began firing at the group, she said.

    As Mickiel fired shots at the victims’ vehicle, the military member retrieved his gun and took cover near the vehicle’s front fender, according to Hain. Two unidentified males also shot at the group, she said.

    The service member fired two shots and struck Mickiel twice, she said.

    1. SF’d the link, damn you

    2. Yeah, but this wasn’t preventing a “mass shooting” since the shooter didn’t kill 3 people!

  24. NYC-area Reasonoids-

    Let’s put together a get-together. How will Saturday 8/26 work for all of you? Say 5pm at Rattle and Hum?

    1. Crap I meant Saturday 7/26 (Saturday July 26) not 8/26…

      1. Works for me.

    2. I’ll try and make an effort to drive in from Montreal.

    3. Not sure how busy your group is, but from our last attempt to organize one in Boston, I suggest you just go ahead and jump straight to doodle or WhenIsGood right now.

      1. This will be my first attempt to get a NYC-area group together.

        1. We went through about 4 rounds of counterproposals before settling on just filling out a WhenIsGood for the whole month and determining the date that way.

          1. Speaking of which, shall we do that again gents?

            I can’t do much; I’ve broken my right hand and I type at 1 baud right now.

            1. Hamilton said he’s pretty busy for a few weeks, but would be up for something near the end of the month. As long as it’s before mid August I’m game. Otherwise I’ll have to wait for September (in which case maybe we should just do the Pats game he suggested).

              1. I’m with Auric, anything after this week but before Mid August is good for me.

                As far as the Pats game, sorry Football is much more enjoyable to watch indoors than at the game. Or maybe I’m still just jaded from having Pats Season Tickets for the 87 season (aka the Scab year)

    4. I should be able to make it.

    1. cocaine is a hell of a drug

  25. I’m surprised IFH didn’t post this:

    Why Australia needs knife control

    A man has been stabbed to death in a frenzied attack in front of shoppers at the Westfield shopping centre at Parramatta in Sydney’s west.


    Shopping centre employees said they heard two women screaming: “He’s killing him! He’s killing him!”

    Myer employee Bianca Zoratto-Ivanov said a friend of hers saw the stabbing close to the cosmetics section at the entrance of the store.

    “He heard a scream, like a man yell,” she said. “He heard it again and then he heard two young women scream: ‘He’s killing him! He’s killing him!’

    “That’s when he turned around and saw the incident was taking place. He saw the man facing the store and doing the stabbing motions.”

    Ms Zoratto-Ivanov said she knew the employee at Aquila Shoes who had seen the offender drive a machete into the victim.

    “The man had a big machete,” she said.

    There are quite a few photos, although not of the actual stabbing victim or accused perpetrator. Unfortunately, there’s also a video that claims to be an autoplay (I have Flash turned off by default, so I don’t know if it will really autoplay for the rest of you).

    1. It is understood the man, who has yet to be charged, ripped off his shirt and lit a cigarette before officers turned up to take him into custody.

      The monster! That mall is non-smoking!

      1. The first report I saw of this, from the Radio New Zealand blog, led with the panic-mongering idea that children might have seen the attack.

        Take the little snowflakes to an abattoir for a field trip.

        1. Why do people use the less visceral french ‘abattoir’ instead of the apt (and english) ‘slaughterhouse’?

          1. Asked and answered, I’d say

          2. “…you see, we were expecting a block of flats…nice though, the abattoir is.”

          3. To be fair, this happened in a country where they don’t know how to spell the word “center”.

          4. Why do people use the less visceral french ‘abattoir’ instead of the apt (and english) ‘slaughterhouse’?

            Most them haven’t gotten to slaughterhouse on their word of the day toilet paper yet.

    2. With a name like Zoratto-Ivanov, I dare say she should know about “driving a machete into the victim”.

    3. My proposal for common sense knife control is to put guns in the hands of honest citizens to eliminate knife attackers before they can wreak havok on the population.

  26. So Hillary is claiming that it is okay for her to take these huge speaking fees because they are going to charity, as in the Clinton Foundation. I just want everyone to know that I will gladly accept a large speaking fee and promise to donate all proceeds to the John Foundation for Exotic Sports Cars and World Travel. So come on you Reasonoids, hire me and support a good cause.

    1. Don;t forget to hire your children to run your foundation…because I am sure they don;t care about money too!

      1. For sure, especially since my kids are unlikely to get paid $600,000 for a do nothing job on NBC.

        I always thought you had to be good looking to be a news reader. Apparently if you are the daughter of a Democratic President, fence post homely is good enough.

    2. The sad thing is, people will fall for this. As if the Clinton Foundation isn’t paying her expenses (and more, I’m sure) and shifting money to people who can advance her career.

  27. Bloomberg’s gun group to start 2014 midterms strategy by surveying candidates

    Bloomberg’s group, Everytown for Gun Safety, is asking all Senate and House incumbents and candidates to complete a 10-part questionnaire stating publicly where they stand on issues such as expanding background checks for gun buyers, limiting the capacity of ammunition magazines and toughening gun-trafficking statutes.

    The survey intends to make candidates state their positions on the record for the first time. Everytown plans to use their answers ? as well as an analysis of any past legislative votes and public statements ? to rally voters for or against them in key Senate and House races this fall, similar to how the NRA uses its ratings system to motivate pro-gun-rights voters.

    I have a feeling this won’t work the way they want it to…

    1. “Surveying Candidates” “getting Democrats to drop the mask and take an unpopular stand” is all the same.

    2. Oh yeah, that’ll work just fine. Go ahead and get as many Democrats as you can on the record supporting gun control, Bloomie. Some nice sound bites will do wonders. It’ll do.just.about as well as getting Republicans on the record talking about science and abortion..

    3. FTFS:
      Under current law, it is difficult to prosecute and convict people suspected of trafficking illegal guns because the penalties for trafficking are small and violations are difficult to prove. In fact, the current penalty for gun trafficking is the same as for trafficking chickens across state lines. Do you support legislation that would create a strong federal gun trafficking statute with serious penalties?

      Hey, Mike — Make sure you get an answer from Eric Holder.

    4. “We’re going to be very, very data-driven, metrics-driven”

      Except for these data and metrics, of course.

    5. “Do you support an assault soda ban?”

      “What about sugar limits for non-assault sodas?”

    6. You missed this part in your quote…

      This is the first big step by Bloomberg ? who has committed to spending $50 million of his personal fortune this year to build a national grass-roots movement that will pressure lawmakers

      Words mean nothing!

  28. It’s amazing how often dogs attack officers versus how often they attack non-officers, isn’t it?

    It is said dogs can can smell fear and weakness.

  29. Anthony Cumia fired by Sirius XM for “racially charged” tweets.

    My subscription was cancelled this morning.


    1. Everything he said was true. But truth doesn’t matter. Only the revolutionary narrative matters.

      1. I always knew they would be fired sooner or later, I assumed it would be for something on-air. Ironic how satellite radio went from defiantly free-speech / anything goes to scared PC pussies in a decade.

        Time for a new medium. I’m sure they’ll be back on the internet unless Ant goes to Hollywood to make millions doing cartoon voices.

        1. What he said wasn’t racist. But even if it was, big fucking deal. If you don’t like him turn it off.

          1. If you don’t like him turn it off.

            That’s exactly why he got sacked.

            1. It’s also why selling XM stock short right now might payoff. I expect they’ll lose a couple hundred thousand subscribers.

              1. Is Howard Stern supporting him? Obviously he probably did not.

            2. I am pretty sure the guy gets big ratings. And if Syrus applied this outrage in any consistent way, you might have a point. But they don’t. It is just PC group think.

  30. Your body, my choice

    Former The View star, Sherri Shepard, 47, has said she doesn’t want her unborn surrogate baby.

    Shepard and her husband, Lamar Sally, have recently split and TMZ is reporting she’s not interested in being a mother for the second time because of the breakdown of her relationship which will leave her financially burdened.

    1. There has to be some kind of binding contract for this, no? What an astoundingly fucked situation.

    2. How shallow and horrible do you have to be to go through the process of getting a surrogate and then deciding you don’t want to do it?

      It is a baby, not a special order car you stupid fucking cow.

      1. Why do you hate women, John?

      2. The only good thing is there is some childless couple who cant afford surrogacy that is about to get a cheap baby. I hope.

        1. Yeah, the one good thing is that this may get enough publicity so that there are plenty of takers who deeply want the kid.

    3. This is a woman who believes the earth is flat. The kid is gonna be better off.

    4. After the collapse of her marriage, Shepard appeared at a function where she told US Weekly that “you can’t beat yourself up”. She told the audience that she has great support from her friends at this time, “I have a lot of really wonderful friends [who] say “erase that!




      Yet, these people would argue that we have all sorts of responsibilities to each other, facilitated by government.

    5. Honestly, assuming the pregnancy comes to term, the kid is dodging a bullet. I sort of assumed people on The View eat their young.

  31. The United States has surpassed Saudi Arabia to become the world’s biggest oil producer.

    Yet gas prices are still high as shit. It’s almost as if someone had a plan to make energy prices sky rocket.

    1. Or that destroying the value of the dollar might affect the price of something that is priced in dollars.

      1. Yet gas and crude oil are still less than in 2008 – six years ago.

        1. Only according to the voices in your head.

          They were at $4.09 in the summer. But were back below $2 by November. Obama said he was going to make war on the middle class by sending energy prices through the roof and he did.


          At the same time Wall Street, internet billionaires, and various green energy cronies are doing great. Obama protected the people who put him there. He was sent there to rob the middle class and give it to his cronies on Wall Street and Silicon Valley and that is exactly what he has done.

          He is President Goldman Sachs.

          1. You’re an idiot. Oil prices plunged in late 2008 amid an economic collapse.

            Obama has the same policies now and they have returned to their norm yet still lower than in July 2008.

            1. they have returned to their norm yet still lower than in July 2008.

              The “norm” is somehow higher over longer periods than it used to be.

              They’ve been over $3.00/gallon for nearly 4 years, breaking the old record by a lot.


          2. He is President Goldman Sachs.

            Is that why he fined Goldman $550 million and charged them $6 billion (23%) for their TARP loan?

            1. The results speak for themselves. The middle class is dying and Wall Street is richer than ever.

              It might be that he is so fucking stupid that he didn’t mean for it to happen and fucked up so badly it happened anyway. That could be true. But whether stupid or intentional, the results are the same.

              There is also more than a bit of racism. Obama has made it clear he doesn’t care about what typical white people think.

              1. The private sector hates flyover country labor. They started offshoring plants 15 years ago in mass. Has nothing to do with Obama (or Bush).

                1. Yes shreek,

                  You are a fascist who would put millions in ovens if you ever had the chance. But we already knew that.

              2. Don’t you enjoy the cognitive dissonance of so-called progressives saying it’s wonderful that certain plutocrats are getting wealthier?

                1. I am a liberal, you idiot. I applaud Goldman Sachs and capital formation. They earn their cash (although they don’t have anyone like Buffett).

                  Buffett is the King of Capitalism.

              3. *** rising intonation ***

                What about his grandmother ….?

    2. Man, I bet they never even talked about it in public before being elected, either.

      1. It is just bad luck DB. That damned George Bush set the Middle East on fire, yet he was so lucky gas prices stayed low for him. A black man just can’t catch a break.

        1. It’s because our society is practically drenched in institutional racism. There must have been some will to elect Obama just to make him the fall guy. America is lousy with racism and continues to trod down a dark path.

    3. what about refining capacity? Seems they have been shutting down oil refineries across this country. And it’s not easy to set up new ones.

  32. Climate data shows US in a decade long cooling.


    And Antarctic sea ice is at an all time high and continues to grow.

    Climate change baby.

    1. This only proves that the climate is changing.

    2. You’re just not smart enough to realize that Arctic Ice is from warming not cooling.

      1. Uh….Carbon Trappification Global Ice Forming Warming Climate Chaos!


        1. …Sub-polar vortices..

    1. “..labeled the “Obama Presidential Library” has created a stir on social media more butthurt amongst Twitter’s 3 or 4 dozen eternally/professionally aggrieved and is also receiving criticism in Norfolk, Nebraska by two people in fly-over country.”

  33. Government Data Show U.S. in Decade-Long Cooling

    The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration’s most accurate, up-to-date temperature data confirm the United States has been cooling for at least the past decade. The NOAA temperature data are driving a stake through the heart of alarmists claiming accelerating global warming.

      1. Time for some IRS-type crashing of drives containing real-world data.

        1. They don’t even need to do that. Just “adjust” the past records.

        2. Actually, the destruction of original temperature is even more egregious than the IRS-style. At least the IRS pretended their loss of critical data was due to a hard disk crash. The climate change cult claimed they intentionally destroyed their original data sets because they lacked adequate storage space.


      2. Read this column from 2009 and follow some of the links.

        In 2009, George Will wrote a column about some of the climate change hysteria and the alarmists thoroughly tore him a new one for all the lies and bullshit he was slinging.

        The biggest outrage was that he said the University of Illinois Artic Research Center had reported sea ice was at or near 1979 levels when a few minutes fact checking with the researchers themselves drew the response that they had no idea where he was getting his numbers and they had said no such thing.

        Except that George Will was telling the truth – everything he was saying was quoted and sourced. The researchers themselves had to issue a ‘clarification’ in which they spent approximately two sentences admitting that well, yeah, they had said that and yes, it was true – but then spent the rest of the page explaining why the fact that sea ice was at 1979 levels provided evidence that global warming was real and sea ice was disappearing.

        ‘Climate change’ may be real, but the extremists promoting hysterics are just shooting themselves in the foot by pushing the crap that is so easily identified as crap.

  34. What’s Lurking Beneath The Glossy Veneer Of The Jobs Report?

    On the surface, last week’s jobs report was glossy good news: the U.S. economy added 288,000 non-farm jobs. Beneath the glossy veneer, however, the news wasn’t quite as good as advertised: full-time jobs declined by 523,000 and part-time jobs surged 840,000.


    1. Of course. We have a black guy in charge so no one wants to hire.

      1. Dammit, will somebody fix the PB software already? It’s acting even less coherent than normal.

        1. Clinton = robust record setting job numbers.

          Obama = tepid weak job numbers

          Same policy – same top end tax rate.

          Obama is BLACK – that is the only logical reason!

          Economic collapse like 1929? NAAHHHHHHH!!! NO WAY!

          1. the incoherency is only getting worse.

            1. Yeah, reduced to shrieking “racist”…

              Late stage political dementia.

              1. It’s time that all of us stopped responding to it.

            2. I was being facetious in the conclusion part.

              How do you explain the record setting jobs under Clinton and the midling recovery under Obama if it is not policy (which is the same)?

              1. the thing is, shreek, it doesn’t matter what one says to rebut your insanity. You will continue to believe in what you think is true, no matter what facts get in your way. You have all the fervor of a religious zealot. It’s all rather sad.

                1. You cannot answer that question rationally. So you veer.

                  That is the problem with you Peanuts – you cannot deal with complexity.

                  Answer the question.

                  1. I’ll answer your question, you fucking idiot.

                    First, Clinton cut a lot of welfare programs, which meant people were much more likely to NEED to enter the job market. That’s not the case today.

                    Also, economic development policy aside, Clinton didn’t impose a huge burden on business with unknown consequences (ACA) which is pushing investment confidence to new lows.

                    Lastly, Clinton worked within an accepted legal framework to get his policies in place. Obama skirting the laws and flat-out ruling by fiat makes people leery to abide by the increased regulatory burdens imposed on them until those burdens are upheld by the judiciary.

                    There, asshole. Happy now?

                    1. 1- People don’t NEED jobs today?

                      2- Investment is going gangbusters as far as venture capital and IPOs/mergers are concerned. Capex is way up. Oil & Gas investment is better than ever.

                      3- Obama is no different than any other POTUS on EO decrees. You just look for it now. Obama is funding new Nuclear plants for crying out loud.

                    2. 1. Welfare,to,work,cut the spigot off at some point. Mondays system just adds bennies all the time.

                      2. Bullshit. Companies are sitting on more cash reserves than ever due to the uncertainty coming from Washington. As for oil and gas exploration,,it’s up due to improved efficiencies and a rising price per barrel. I know this having worked with oilmen for the past 7+ years.

                      3. If he were no different, consumer confidence and investor confidence would be flat. His NLRB recess appointments alone have caused great ripples. I could go into his executive orders concerning the EPA if you’d like to explore how much uncertainty they’ve created in infrastructure expenditures.

                    3. Mondays=Obama’s

                      That was an odd autocorrect.

                    4. All your weekdays are belong to him

                  2. and he goes on to prove my point. Jeezus, that’s some rotten programming.

                2. It’s not insane; it’s not sentient!

                  Why you people bother interacting with it is beyond me. Do you discuss politics with ants too?

                  1. Do you discuss politics with ants too?

                    Do the ants know where the emails are?

                  2. As socialist as ants are, they’re very sensible sometimes.

              2. The times and circumstances are nowhere near the same. The economy was robust enough in the 90s to tolerate more bad policy. There was an exploding internet economy and other factors that generated a boom. The housing bubble wasn’t burst then. The Fed wasn’t pumping money into the economy at near the rate it has been doing during this administration. There are plenty of other ways to answer what really is an embarassingly simplistic question from you. Policy does not exist in a vacuum, nor does the economic activity of the nation begin and end with the whims of Washington.

                1. IOW, we were in a cyclical upswing and credit bubble that burst in 2007-08 and like the last one (1929) recovery is not immediate.

                  You know is Romney had been elected the GOP would be crowing about market records and 250,000 new jobs a month.

                  1. Indeed they would, but the Media would be calling them on the bullshit rather than playing along

              3. Obamacare, and… 200,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 new pages of new regulations from the various alphabet soup bureaucracies.. and Boooooosh!?!

              4. the midling recovery under Obama

                Actually, that would be the weakest recovery ever.

          2. He’s progressing out of anger and into bargaining. Let’s just let him go, at this rate he’ll reach acceptance by 2019.

            1. He’s starting to sound like a demented version of a Democratic Hannity.

              “Yes or No? Answer the question. Just ANSWER THE QUESTION”

              1. How do you explain the record setting jobs under Clinton and the midling recovery under Obama if it is not policy (which is the same)?

                1. You just accused the board of not being able to deal with complexity and then you say that Obama’s policies are the same as Clinton’s. Herpy derpy doo!

                2. Policy is not the same, just one small slice that you chose to focus on was the same

    2. ACA avoidance strategies.

      1. “You can’t spell ‘macaca’ without ACA!”

  35. I’m sure this was already covered over the weekend – or even today.

    Stolen Tesla Involved in Police Pursuit Crashes Into Cars, Splits in Half in WeHo; 7 Injured

    A witness told KTLA that the Tesla hit the pole and split in half, and that part of the vehicle landed on top of a white car.

    “There were fires after that that broke out,” Eric Martinez said. “I saw the firefighters ? like 25 firefighters ? standing around the white car with the Jaws of Life.”

    Martinez added that at one point, explosions could be heard.

    “We originally thought it was fireworks. Everybody thought it was fireworks that were just exploding,” he said.

    1. Making a car into a toxic waste transporter might not be such a good idea after all. Someone needs to bring a clash action suit against Elon Musk for selling an unsafe product.

      GM gets killed for making cars with bad ignition switches. Musk makes a fucking traveling bomb and that is okay because of mother earth or something.

      Sue those fucking golf cars off the roads.

      1. Someone needs to bring a clash action suit against Elon Musk for selling an unsafe product.

        Sharif, he won’t like it.

        1. If this happened in Madrid, I wonder how well these Spanish Bombs would be playing in their newspapers.

        2. Thinks its not kosher.

        3. “Sharif, he won’t like it.”

          It will “Clash” with his delicate sensibilities..

  36. Kidnapped Nigerian girls ‘escape from Boko Haram abductors’

    More than 60 women and girls abducted by the Boko Haram Islamist militant group in Nigeria have managed to escape, according to reports.

    An official with a Borno state vigilante group said the group took a chance to flee when the insurgents went to attack soldiers and police officers in Bamboa on Friday night and Saturday morning.

    “I have just received an alert from my colleagues in Damboa area that about 63 of the abducted women and girls had made it back home. They took the bold step when their abductors moved out to carry out an operation”, the official, Abbas Gava, said according to Nigeria’s Premium Times.

    1. Sorry girls, your 15 minutes of fame are over. Michelle and brats are tweeting about the World Cup now.

      1. Now, John, not so fast. FLOTUS might want to ask those girls what Boko Haram fed them.

  37. I went back to revisit the comments on the previous thread… and they’re gone


    1. So is the rest of the article, yes?

      Was there a sudden attack of shame?

      1. It’s always a healthy exercise to check your premises and examine whether the people you disagree with may be onto something.

        Wrote this in the article, then deletes the comments.

  38. ACA avoidance strategies.

    Haters gotta hate.

  39. http://www.theguardian.com/cul…..nslaughter

    ICE T, thinks men are being made into sissies and is a huge fan of Jethro Tull. Who knew?

  40. This weekend for my son I put together a 14′ trampoline. And then I proceeded to spend hours on it. Damn my legs… and back.. and hips hurt like a 80yo.

    1. I’m not sure how my male cousins and I survived the couple of years my uncle had a trampoline.

      1. The safety tags are all over the place… plus the installation of the outer poles and mesh to stop jumpers from leaving the inner ring.

        When I was young, I used to jump on the neighbor’s trampoline. And fall off… and have my legs go through the mat ringing the outside. But yet here I am.

        1. The safety tags are all over the place

          You mean “tramp stamps”?

        2. I’m not sure what the safety tags are, but we did not have the wall to keep you from going off. We actually did that on purpose quite a bit.

  41. A man accused of killing his cousin during a violent sex game has been found not guilty.

    Mark Pickford was discovered by police asleep in his cousin Dawn Warburton’s bed, which was covered in blood. Her body was found hanging above him, with rope he owned tied several times around her neck. She had injuries to her body and arms. During the trial, Pickford said he couldn’t remember anything from that night because he blacked out from drinking and taking drugs.

    1. He added he had not engaged in sexual games with her before she died.

      And he knows this … how?

      1. Because he’s not interested in sex games with the living.

    2. “You’re getting tied up, I will treat you like a random victim, gonna do you Manchester style.”

      I’m afraid to know what Manchester style is. Don’t want to add it to my Google search history.

      1. “I’ll do you like a Manchester United supporter in a riot!”

      2. I can’t find anything on what it means, other than it might be a reference to Trevor Hardy, the Beast of Manchester.

      3. I doubt it means any particular sexual act. He’s from Manchester, she was from Hull, and it was just banter

    3. GreatPower ? Rebecca Rose – Yesterday 11:05pm

      Trying to form an opinion on this, but having trouble since this didn’t take place in Florida and is thus ineligible for a Bugs Bunny gif.

      It’s in England – it’s already been sawed off from a mainland, what else can we really do for this story?


  42. So around my neck of the woods a lot of fast food places have started putting up banners that they accept EBT cards. I don’t exactly take this as an encouraging sign of the times.

    1. Meh. If you’re going to give money to people for food, they can spend it how they want to.

      1. And fast food has high calorie/dollar ratios.

  43. http://www.bloombergview.com/a…..fty-enough

    Liberal boycotters find out, boycotting doesn’t work very well when you don’t shop there in the first place.

    McArdle makes an accurate observation here but misses what is going on. One of the dings against Progs is that for them every issue is civil rights and it is forever 1964. That is true on a lot of levels. It is literally true but also figuratively true. What Progs, mostly because they are idiotic fanatics, always forget is that 1964 was the end of the process not the beginning. Boycotts worked in the 1960s because beginning with the first abolitionists in the 1830s, there had been a 130 year argument about legal equality for black people that had finally been settled. The boycotts worked because one side had one the argument and a majority of the people were no longer willing to tolerate Jim Crow. Progs forget that and think they don’t have to win an argument or convince anyone. They can just skip the 130 year part and go straight to the boycott and victory. Ah, no.

    1. Calls to boycott generally make me check to see if there’s any way I can increase doing business with the target of the shrieking eels’ wrath. While there’s a Hobby Lobby relatively close by, I don’t generally need much from their product line.

      1. Hmm, you could start tie dying all of your clothing?

        1. I’m not going to sugarcoat it… sooner or later, EVERYONE needs construction paper, glue, glitter, and macaroni.. That’s just the way it is.

  44. So is everyone else getting the thing that after submitting, you dont get a reply to this link anymore until you refresh? Or is that just chrome only?

    Bug or did the squirrels actual do this on purpose for some stupid reason?

    1. Yes. I work around it by posting in firefox, then going to Chrome with reasonable to check the new posts. It’s a nuisance but it works for me.

      1. This is all a test to see if libertarians can break the code and continue to post here!
        Plus, it might drive the NSA’r assigned to us nuts.

      2. There’s now a firefox add-on, fascr, that does the same type of stuff as Reasonable.

        1. I tried to install this… but couldn’t find the add-on. Wut do?

            1. btw – it works very well.

              For any other FF user:

              1) Download latest .xpi file here

              2) manually install Firefox add-on

              3) restart/refresh Firefox

              4) by clicking on the X box to the right of the user name, all posts by that user will be hidden, including the subthread

              5) Too see the just the name with no content, but other responses/subthreads, change the settings inside the Firefox add-on manager.

              1. I’m a fan. I was not willing to switch to Chrome just for the features of reasonable, but it is really nice highlighting the new posts and ignoring Bo and ButtPlug right here in Firefox.

              2. Worked, Thx.

        2. There’s now a firefox add-on, fascr

          yup, it just appeared 🙂

          1. bdhr – thanks, but does it play well with Noscript? I’m not seeing the little x-out buttons to hide people.

            1. I doubt it. I haven’t tested it with NoScript, but fascr works largely by inserting scripts onto the page.

              It’s similar to how userscripts (e.g., with Greasemonkey) won’t work if you have NoScript turned on.

              So you will probably need to whitelist Reason.

            2. I run Noscript and I’m getting the little x-outs.

    2. Squirrel here – We just made an update that should fix this issue. So, clear your cache and you should have green lights all the way.

      If you are still experiencing it shoot an email to the squirrel nest (webmaster@reason.com) and we will get this issue sorted out.

      Thanks for the helpful comment.

    1. Isn’t it about some other couple’s tussle over celebrity crushes?

      Anyway, I like how the moron commenters on Jezebel confirm the ravings of moron PUAs by noting how attracted they are to “assholes” (seriously, their words!)

      1. It’s all about the subtext with Moore. You only have to read her work a few times to realize that she hates her husband and her kids and herself.

        Just look at some of her article titles:

        Here’s Why You’re Wearing More Makeup Than Everyone Thinks You Need To

        What Is a ‘Sophisticated Handjob,’ and Isn’t It an Oxymoron?

        ‘Looking Your Age’ Has Lost All Meaning

        Heads Up, Men: You Have No Secrets

        If You Could Choose Your Parenting Choice Again, Would You?

        Come On, How Often Do You Really Have to Poop on a Date?

        The Truth About How Much a Happy Couple Should Have Sex

        Eight Reasons to Spank Your Kid

        Nothing Can Help You Decide Whether to Have Kids

        What if Equality Is the Biggest Bonerkiller of All?

        Ladies Aren’t the Ones Letting Themselves Go After Marriage

        How Often Do You Really Need to Shower?

        Any Man Who Won’t Clean Is a Terrible Asshole (Or Old, or Both)

        What Does It Even Mean to Be a ‘Needy’ Girl?

        1. Come On, How Often Do You Really Have to Poop on a Date?


    2. dude. Elliot Stabler and Jon Stewart are my ultimate loves!! My real life boyfriend is a New Yorker, and when he told me about a year ago that he is considering becoming a policeman I literally shrieked with joy.

      A Jezzie who is hot for NY cops. Somebody get my dictionary, I need new words for this.

      1. I am pretty sure at least one of the words will be “submissive”.

      2. A NYPD cop to be? Well in that case, I know what we’ll be calling her in 5 years.

        A battered spouse.

      3. Yeah, right. A Jezzie has a “real life boyfriend.”

        I’m not buying it.

        1. Right now he’s on vacation in Canada.

  45. “U.S. oil output will surge to 13.1 million barrels a day in 2019 and plateau thereafter, according to the IEA, a Paris-based adviser to 29 nations. The country will lose its top-producer ranking at the start of the 2030s, the agency said in its World Energy Outlook in November.”

    Isn’t the world supposed to die from global warming, and/or sea level rise before then?

  46. While there’s a Hobby Lobby relatively close by, I don’t generally need much from their product line.


    I was in a Hobby Lobby a few years ago, and was pleasantly surprised to discover they stock model rocket engines and other supplies. Build a cruise missile, and threaten your pesky neighbors with it. Also, model cars/airplanes/battleships.

    1. Are the little boxes meant to make the cock look like a grenade? If so, nice tough

      1. or “touch”

  47. I wore a bikini and nothing happened

    She failed to notice all the vomiting bystanders, apparently.

    1. john pron

  48. The latest release of NSA files by Edward Snowden reveals the “extent to which ordinary Web users are caught in the net.”

    Luckily, I’m no ordinary Web user!

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