You Know What This Hotel Made Out of Ice Needs? Smoke Detectors!
The regulations will be followed, even if they make no sense


Visitors to the IceHotel in the village of Jukkasjärvi, Sweden, should consider themselves lucky. Well, obviously, the hotel, which is exactly what the name suggests, is a huge draw around the world and reservations aren't exactly easy to come by. Anybody who can afford a room there probably leads a pretty lucky life. But visitors are also lucky that they all haven't perished in a roaring fire! It turns out the IceHotel has been operating all this time (since 1990) with no smoke detectors!
Authorities in Sweden have finally put an end to this reckless endangerment by the company. Courtesy of Agence France-Presse:
The Ice Hotel, located in the small Arctic town of Jukkasjarvi, is following a request by authorities to guarantee the safety of its guests.
Hotel spokeswoman Beatrice Karlsson said the hotel was a little surprised at first, but understood as "there are things that can actually catch fire, like pillows, sleeping bags or reindeer skins".
"To us the most important concern is the safety of our clients, so we will comply," she said.
Some may point out that fires that break out in pillows and sleeping bags are unlikely to spread anywhere in a hotel made entirely out of ice or produce enough smoke to cause serious inhalation problems, but that's not the point! The point is that safety rules must be followed no matter what!
Plus, ice can totally catch on fire. As this little experiment below shows, all they have to do is accidentally build the IceHotel on top of a bunch of calcium carbide:
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All right stop
Collaborate and listen
Ice is back with a brand new invention
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly
Will it ever stop?
Yo, I don't know
Well duh, smoking indoors is hazardous to children and other living things.
Hotel spokeswoman Beatrice Karlsson said the hotel was a little surprised at first, but understood as "there are things that can actually catch fire, like pillows, sleeping bags or reindeer skins".
"To us the most important concern is the safety of our clients, so we will comply," she said.
I appreciate Nice-Don't-Want-To-Offend-Scandahoovian TM as much as the next person, but sometimes a whole lot of sass and rebellion is called for.
They did say they were a little surprised. That is sassy and rebellious for a Swede.
They should probably put in melt detectors.
Smoke detectors? I'd be more concerned about why the heaters don't work.
These poor Lapps had all the fight beaten out of them centuries ago. You don't expect them to risk a blood eagle over this, do you, Shackford?
It's not about putting smoke detectors in to detect smoke, it's about compliance and job security for regulators.
This is just like the people who think that getting the Silk Road up and running again is "winning".
I bet there were a lot of high fives in the agency the day that inspector found the lack of smoke detectors. Probably made him inspector of the year.
Just when you think you've reached peak derp, something like this happens.
For anyone who hasn't had a chance to do so, I'd just like to say that playing with calcium carbide and snow and ice is a lot of fun.
there are things that can actually catch fire, like pillows, sleeping bags or reindeer skins
Pillows and sleeping bags are all flame resistant, so they aren't catching fire accidentally. They'll only burn if they are in a bigger fire.
And reindeer skin? Flammable? Are you kidding me?
Whooooosh!
We clean and de-tick our reindeer skins in the finest kerosine.
Do you live in a world where hair isn't flammable?
See, they're not hairless; the entire point of a reindeer skin on your bed is that it's covered in very dense, highly insulative hair.
I've actually been around a reindeer skin or two, and I wouldn't bet a dollar on it not burning pretty well if, oh, a candle fell on it.
How many Eskimos have you ever heard of that turned into human torches when a coal lands on their caribou hide blanket?
I'm thinking not too many.
Will it burn, sure under direct flame. Will it support combustion on its own...not too likely.
The pillows, sleeping bags and skins are all used in conjunction with the furniture which is, of course, made of ice. Anything that caught fire would quickly find itself doused in a puddle of bed, couch or chair.
I'm sorry, but this barely registers a "meh" on my libertarian rage-o-meter.
Where ever there are people sleeping and flammable materials are around, smoke detectors are good to have around, even in an ice hotel. I'm somewhat surprised that the hotel operators had overlooked installing them in the past.
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