A.M. Links: Eric Holder Approved Seizure of Fox Reporter's Records, Boy Scouts Accept Gay Kids, Fold Your iPad (Eventually)


Get Reason.com and Reason 24/7 content widgets for your websites.

Follow Reason and Reason 24/7 on Twitter, and like us on Facebook.  You can also get the top stories mailed to you—sign up here. Have a news tip? Send it to us!

NEXT: Rumors Andy Kaufman Actually Alive in Albuquerque

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  1. Letters of Intimidation to Tea Party Groups from Lois Lerner – IRS Director of Exempt Organizations

    We now know that Lois Lerner, the Director of Exempt Organizations for the Internal Revenue Service – who refused to testify before a House committee by invoking the Fifth Amendment – has a paper trail that reveals her direct involvement in sending intrusive and harassing questionnaires to Tea Party groups in 2012.

    just two mavericks! Just TWO!

    1. FoE’s Memorial Day weekend has obviously started early.

          1. The only friend I had was FoE and I didn’t know him.

            1. Nately’s Whore is still pissed about me telling her about Nately.

    2. But she’s innocent.

      She told me so when she plead the 5th.

      1. Only innocent people plead the 5th, don’t you know.

        1. I start with the 5th, just to confuse people. Sometimes I plead the 3rd to send them running for the lawbooks before going back and saying “sorry, it was aurthurian counting”

          1. I like that you refuse to quarter soldiers.

            1. Not me, I was planning on crashing on his couch later tonight.

        2. You can’t claim you are innocent, and then take the 5th…

          So I have a question.

          Do they charge everyone with perjury if they plead not guilty, and then were subsequently found guilty?

          1. I don’t know – are you under oath when you make a pleading?

          2. Claiming you are “not guilty”, even under oath, is arguably a general, subjective statement, since “not guilty” includes “I don’t think the state can prove its case beyond a reasonable doubt”. Saying under oath, “I did not stab Citizen X”, not so much so.

            1. In any event, you can ALWAYS assert your 5th A rights, even in mid-sentence. You can’t say something that permanently waives your inalienable rights.

              1. Yeah the case history (as I understand it from others) does not support that view.

    3. She must have had an auto-pen…so really, she didnt actually ‘sign’ those letters.

  2. Warty can already fold his iPad.

    1. Warty can fold the space-time continuum.

      1. “fold” is not usually the first four-letter word starting with F that springs to mind when Warty’s mentioned

        1. Foil? Like the tinfoil hats he wears on his heads?

        2. You almost caused my demise with remark. After surviving two wartime tours, I really wouldn’t want the story of my passing to have read “Man chokes to death on coffee after laughing while reading a reason.com “Hit & Run” comment.

          1. Or shorter, “Oz snark kills Yank veteran”

            1. Must have been a Boojum.

            2. I almost made my bones

            1. a guy actually did laugh himself to death watching this

              1. there is no way a guy laughed himself to death watching that

                1. He didn’t a drop bear got him and the folks in Oz covered it up by claiming death by laughter.

  3. New Jersey cop reportedly firebombs supervisor’s home, charged with attempted murder

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..z2UDNA5zzI

    Apparently politicians are more equal then cops.

    1. Wow someone slipped his leash

  4. ‘Who are you to judge me?’ Kendall Jenner hits back after being called a ‘f***ing idiot’ by Frances Bean Cobain

    I would have said “At least I don’t look like your mom.”

    1. Is it just me, or is it kind of weird that the only Kardashian who is actually attractive is not a Kardashian?

      1. Kanye or Ray J?

      2. So you never found Kim or Kourtney Kardashain attractive? Are you gay? NTTAWWT

        1. They aren’t attractive. Sure with lots of make up they can be made to look physically unrepulsive, but no amount of makeup can fix a repellent personality.

          1. I got news, tarran: Kourtney’s personality is orders of magnitude less repellent than Kendall’s (or Kim’s).

            1. That’s like saying the Madagascar Hissing Cockroach is much less repellent thant the Common Cockroach.

              Nonetheless, it’s still a fucking cockroach.

              1. Oh what, you know them personally now?

                1. Oh pish posh, I’m going by the shows, and of course I know they’re not “real,” but the younger girls regularly act like assholes. As is the wont of teenagers.

                  1. Sorry, I meant that to tarran.

                    1. I infer it from (a) their behavior on the bits of their reality show that I have seen, and (b) considering what sort of people would think those shows improve their lives or situations.

                      They really rub me the wrong way.

          2. Jeez, dude, I’m not talking about their fucking personality. Seriously, if you like dudes, i don’t judge.

        2. Yeah I mean as a straight woman I can’t really say who’s attractive or not but I would be a pretty happy camper if I looked like Kourtney.

          1. Ewww.

    2. The funniest thing about that little teen slapfight is Frances climbing on her high horse and acting as if she came from some grounded, normal family.

      Bitch, your mom is a drug-addled freak and your dad was a low-testosterone goon that was so upset about becoming famous he ate a breakfast of buckshot. You’re really in no position to judge anyone’s family life.

    1. It’s incredible, this far into his 2nd term and people on the left and right still react to Obama’s words rather than his actions. I guess I’m probably just echoing Welch’s post from yesterday.

      1. It is amazing how disconnected his words are from the reality of his administrations actions.

    2. What possible reason could a president have for taking great care to avoid ordering the death of innocent people, other than ideology? I can’t think of any.

      Um, it’ll help the Dems in the midterms?

  5. Speaking of which, Courtney Love is still a disgusting cow.

    1. I’ve always thought Hole was the apogee of Grunge Rock. I’d say forming the band was the second best event the Love was involved in.

      1. Im kinda a fan of Melissa Auf der Mahr, speaking of Hole.

    2. Damn you. Why did I clik on that? I must be an idiot. Please by all that is sacred and holy, no Ke$ha links today. Have mercy.

      1. I use what is given to me. No Ke$ha links in the Mail, no Ke$ha links on the Morning Links.

  6. The Boy Scouts have voted to accept gay scouts, but they’re still not ready for gay scout leaders.

    Any word on the Cub Scouts? I assume they accept bears.

    1. *narrows gaze, slowly shakes head goes back to work*

    2. It’s the same organization. Cub Scouts are a little young to be “out” but our pack has always accepted new scouts that had 2 moms or 2 dads, etc.

  7. Reportedly, ’twas Eric Holder, himself, who signed off on the seizure of Fox News reporter James Rosen’s emails.

    Reporting on this story sounds like a good way to get your emails seized by Eric Holder.

  8. Rut roh. Trayvon Martin wasn’t an angel.

    1. I thought we already knew that.

      1. WE already do know that. But there are still people out there that believe that Martin was an innocent child who was pure of heart and that the evil, racist Zimmerman was just out to shoot some minorities for the lulz.

        Hell, I have recently heard people still talking about how Zimmerman was racist because he said the kid was suspicious looking because he was black. They, of course, are referring to the MSNBC hack job of the 911 call where they edited Zimmerman to fit their narrative.

    2. But he’s an angel *now*.

      1. [rings bell]

        I’m making angels!

    3. Damn, Zimmerman put on some wait in prison.

      Also, this will be immediately portrayed as “blaming the victim” (as if it hasn’t been already). The only difference is that from everything I’ve seen, Trayvon Martin is dead, but he wasn’t the victim.

      1. He probably put on some weight even.

        1. Put on weight while he waited.

          1. Better than waiting to put on weight.

      2. Isn’t waiting the entire point of prison?

      3. I’m just grateful that Martin got the justice he deserved.

    4. So he really could be Obama’s son.

    5. He smoked the marihuana and once held a gun? Good thing he got shot then.

      1. Because teenagers NEVER talk about fighting, drugz or gunz. THE HORROR!

        Technology, at times, is a fucking curse.

      2. That’s not why he was shot, dipshit.

        1. Nobody said it was, tuff gai, but it is being used as a defense for him being shot. I was merely pointing out that it has nothing to do with the incident when he was shot and that only a statist asshole would use it as such. All the intelligent people who read my post understood that.

          1. It’s not being used as a defense for shooting him. It’s being used to show his character. There are a crapton of people who think that Trayvon was a sweet little straight A student who couldn’t possibly have attacked someone. I mean, did you see the picture they posted all over the media? The kid looked like he was a little black angel or something.

            No one is saying “he smoked pot, he should be shot” (sounds like a bizarro version of a Johnny Cochran defense). They’re just trying to show that this kid was most definitely NOT the innocent little angel that the media portrayed him as.

            1. It’s not being used as a defense for shooting him. It’s being used to show his character.

              Oh bullshit. It’s an attempt to taint the jury pool. Which I don’t really have a problem with, considering all of the effort the state of Florida and Seminole County have gone to already to taint it in the other direction. It’s crap when either side does it, but the judge doesn’t seem to have any desire to try and rein it in. Which is just going to make her job of overseeing voir dire and getting a relatively unbiased jury that much more difficult, but w/e.

              And as to his innocence or lack thereof: it’s got nothing to do with whether he should have been shot or not. It doesn’t even really relate to the trial, since, absent a seance, neither side is going to be calling Martin to the stand.

              What matters is whether Zimmerman is successfully able to prove his self-defense claim, and that depends on whether or not the jury believes Z’s version of events, that Martin started the fight by jumping Z. The jury doesn’t have to believe Word One from Z. In which case Z doesn’t prove his affirmative defense and goes down for manslaughter. Murder if the jury is feeling particularly brain dead that day. (Or just doesn’t like him.)

              Whether Martin liked weed or not, or posed with a gun or not, is irrelevant to determining Z’s claims about Martin starting the fight. That’s why it’s bullshit.

              1. It’s not bullshit. If Z’s lawyers were trying to say “look, the kid smoked weed and once held a gun, THAT’s why Z shot him” then it would be. But that’s just not the case here.

                You’re partially right about tainting the jury pool. However, the images are not being released to in any way shape or form justify the actual act of pulling the trigger. It’s simply there to dispel the illusion that T was just a sweet innocent kid that would never jump anyone. If the jury is to believe that T jumped Z, and therefore Z was justified in shooting him, they must believe that T was CAPABLE of doing such a thing. So, yes, it’s an attempt to manipulate the potential jury. But it’s not being used to defend the actual shooting.

                1. IANAL. I’m especially not a FL criminal lawyer. I agree with you about the intent being to dispel the illusion of Martin being an innocent kid. But that isn’t the character trait that’ll be discussed at trial: it’ll be his propensity for violence. Which you mention with your quote on whether T was capable or not of jumping Z.

                  But smoking weed or posing with a gat doesn’t give any clues about that, other than suggest against such a propensity. (How many potheads do you know who like to spar?) The text msgs Martin allegedly wrote though, about getting into a fight at school earlier would shed light on that propensity. Provided they were determined to have been written by him, etc…


                  1. But smoking weed or posing with a gat doesn’t give any clues about that, other than suggest against such a propensity

                    I know this and you know this. But I think you’re giving too much credit to the general public. Most people see someone who does drugs and automatically equates them with being a delinquent. It’s a false equivalency, for sure. But in the mind of the public (who makes up the jury), it “shows” that TM was a “dangerous delinquent” who might just snap due to refer madness. It’s stupid, it’s disingenuous, but effective. The average person out there is horrifically ignorant of the effects of marijuana and the usage of guns.

                    Hell, if smoking weed and holding a gun were ACTUAL evidence of being a violent person, I should be a fucking serial killer.

                    The items related to fighting are both relevant and genuine connections to the plausibility of TM initiating the fight. Placing these in close proximity to the weed/holding a gun items only serves to reinforce the false equivalency.

            2. I probably should have said in the defense rather than as a defense, or something. I didn’t mean to imply that it was the totality of the defense. But it is being used by Z’s defense as a reason why he shouldn’t be convicted. It’s irrelevant to the discussion. Z clearly didn’t know who TM was, so it wasn’t reputation that made Z fear for his life.

              1. I mostly agree with you and thanks for the clarification. But I don’t think the info is irrelevant. As I stated before, most of the populace (the ones that aren’t actually paying attention) believe that T was some little innocent baby boy.

                If Z stands a chance in hell at a successful self defense claim, this notion that T was a good kid who never did anything to anybody has to be dispelled.

                Again, the pictures are not being used to say “see, Z knew he was a bad kid, so he knew it was ok to shoot him.” They’re being used so that when they say that T attacked him, there’s more credibility to the statement.

                1. (The threading at this board sucks, incidentally. I’m really trying to respond to both of you.)

                  FL’s rule on character evidence looks like it tracks the federal rule 404 pretty closely. So, both sides will get to discuss Martin’s tendencies to throw down or be a peacemaker. And Zimmerman’s to get into fights, if Z’s silly enough to bring his own character up first when he takes the stand. I don’t think the prosecution can get into Z’s character traits if Z doesn’t bring those up first. And I don’t know whether Z has to bring them up during his or another witnesses’ direct examination, or whether the defense’s opening statement can be used too.

                  Gripping hand, I wouldn’t put a lot of faith in this judge excluding evidence that might harm Z. The state of Florida has an awful lot invested in making sure this guy hangs for something, and letting the appeals court sort it out later, if ever.

                  It’s not TM’s reputation that’ll be at issue. Is it even admissible? Or relevant in this case? Can you bootstrap reputation evidence to trying to prove a character trait of a crime victim) It’s the character trait of TM being a hothead or not, and how that makes it more or less likely that Z’s telling the truth about how the attack started.

  9. Police tap social media in wake of London attack

    A dedicated team of British police officers are monitoring social media around the clock in the wake of last night’s fatal attack on a soldier in the south-east of London, in order to gauge sentiment and be ready to respond.

    Umut Ertogral, who runs the Opensource Intelligence Unit for London’s Metropolitan Police Service, today told the AusCERT information security conference a team of 17 staff were working seven days a week to track social media feedback and monitor community tension.

    1. And “ready to respond” means “ready to arrest people for voicing their opinions, if said opinions aren’t PC”.

  10. Snow possible in parts of upstate New York and northern New England on Memorial Day weekend? Wow. How’s that “global warming” working out for everyone these days?

    1. It’s in the 40s here in Chi right now. SWEEEEET!

      1. Wind chill was 35 at 5am, per WLS.

      2. I’m lovin’ it. Walked to work this morning without sweating. All weekend as well! God, as much as I hate the government here, moving to Chi from Texas has definitely been a weather upgrade.

      3. 60s in NYC – I’m lovin’ in. All the idiots around me complaining that they are not roasting and sweating can stuff it.

        1. 60 is too warm.

        2. Exactly.

        3. Meh, I’ll take it. That’s as cool as it’s gonna get in NYC at the end of May.

      4. 40 in Geneva too. And it’s supposed to be in the high 70s. I packed all wrong.

        1. Geneva, IL or Genf, Confederatio Helvetica?

          1. That microsoft font one. It’s the one with the hot chicks and chocolate.

    2. It’s no longer “Global warming,” it’s “Climate change.” So that makes it different, since it’s not just about cool (or warm) temps. The fact that they gave it a broader label means it can apply to more things, like 70 degree days in November, or snow in late May.

      1. No, no, it’s “Climate DISRUPTION” now, get with the program! Do you know how disrupting snow on Memorial Day weekend is? THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED!!!

        1. Why does everyone call results spit out of a computer model, science?

          1. Cause of the computer model swallowed it would be porn

            1. GIGitty

        2. A blizzard shutting the city down for a day will cost billions! We’d better shut it down the day before for people’s safety though! Just like Super-Mega-Hurricane-Once-in-a-Generation-Storm Sandy.

      2. Weather Whiplash now. All the, ah, warming, er cooling, er mild weather is causing extremes in some places. Weather Whiplash…

    3. It was warm earlier this week, perfect temp in my garage to ferment a saison.

      Now its too fucking cold (low 70s, saison yeast is weird).

  11. “Lincoln’s compassion during the Civil War is legendary, as are stories about him showing it toward soldiers, many of whom were little more than children,” Raab said. “This stems from his great empathy, but also from his own experience. Nowhere is Lincoln’s character on more vivid display than in his leniency toward the boys who had enlisted in the war.”


    Slobbering fellatio of a guy who introduced the draft to America. Great. Awesome. Fucking hell I hate academics.

    1. You know what other politician showed it to those around him?

      1. Thats easy. Anthony Weiner

      2. Lyndon Johnson?

    2. Because nothing says “compassionate” like “conscription.”

  12. Reporter buys AK-47 parts kit, assembles semi-automatic weapon at gun party and goes shooting in the Mojave Desert – and it’s all entirely legal

    I want…

    1. “Conclusion: At the prompting of his employer, the journalist destroyed the gun he had assembled ”


      1. “destroyed”

    2. Oh yeah! I’m like 90% certain that I’m going to the range tomorrow to shoot my friend’s AK-47 rifle, AK-47 pistol, my 30-06, and a decent number of other guns.

      CANNOT WAIT!!!

    3. Haha, I saw this story linked from someone on Twitter with no comment, and decided the person was probably against it so I decided not to click through. Looks like my predictive powers are as good as ever!

      1. So much pant shitting hysteria!

        Seriously the reason we’re winning is that being antigun basically means you’re a giant pussy. These people are cringing, fearful little cowards.

        1. Seriously the reason we’re winning is that being antigun progressive basically means you’re a giant pussy. These people are cringing, fearful little cowards.


    4. The. Horror.

    5. Joined by a motley crew of gun enthusiasts, he spent an estimated 8 hours assembling the weapon, an exercise that was overseen by the gun experts hosting the event

      These people must have known he was a pants-shitting prog. Who the fuck takes 8 hours to put a gun together?

      1. My other favorite line:

        I park on a bluff, walk to a spot where I can aim at a mountain of scrub brush and sand, and load five rounds. I empty the magazine in seconds.

        Glory be, five rounds fired in “seconds”? Alert the authorities!

    6. Why wouldn’t it be legal? Did he hurt somebody?

    1. I hope he comes to NYC when he’s done in Greece.

  13. The real-life Breaking Bad? School teacher with cancer arrested for drug trafficking after he his found with two bags of meth


  14. Gun, drug texts feature in new Trayvon Martin shooting evidence

    Items taken from Trayvon Martin’s cell phone — including a text-message discussion of drug use and pictures of a gun and marijuana plants — are among new details released Thursday by attorneys for the neighborhood watch volunteer accused of killing him without provocation 14 months ago.

    The evidence, George Zimmerman’s attorneys say, paints a different picture of the 17-year-old than the one portrayed by his family and supporters. Lead defense attorney Mark O’Mara says he will try to use the evidence if prosecutors attempt to attack Zimmerman’s character during his trial on second-degree murder charges, set to begin next month.

    1. well, the pot part does add credence to Obama’s saying that if he had a son…

    2. I’m not sure that pictures of weed really constitute anything that is, in reality (not statist world where drug use automatically makes you evil), anything which would point to him being a not-good guy.

      We have enough evidence of him being an asshole without trying to use the fact that he may or may not have smoked weed to somehow make him look worse. That’s a statists game.

  15. New developments in the printing of graphene-based electronic patterns may allow for foldable electronic devices in the near future.

    How long before wrinkle-free electronic devices, though?

    1. My phone is wrinkle free now.

    2. Why can’t I wear this technology, then run advertisements on it?

  16. Scores of TGI Fridays in New Jersey ‘busted for selling caramel-colored rubbing alcohol as top-shelf scotch’ in statewide crackdown dubbed Operation Swill

    Talk about alcohol abuse…

    1. Just another reason not to go to TGI Friday’s.

      1. This taco tastes like rat.

    2. who goes to TGIF to drink top-shelf Scotch?

      1. If they had gotten away with serving rubbing alcohol for some time, then I would have to say Russian army conscripts, hobos and uber-ironic hipsters?

        1. The Russians color their rubbing alcohol with shoe polish, not expensive caramel dyes.

          1. That is why the conscripts thought it was top shelf!

            1. It was on the top shelf. Left there by the cleaning lady.

    3. Well, the isopropinol probably tasted better than the scotch.

      1. Pistols or swords? At dawn, sirrah!

        1. I’m in New York, you’ll have to sneak your weapons past King Cuomo’s praetorian guard first if you want to defend your warped affinity for wood tannins.

          1. Maybe I’ll farm the job out:

            E: My mad cousin McAdder. The most dangerous man ever to wear a skirt in Europe.

            B: Yeah, he come in here playing the bag-pipes, then he made a haggis, sang Auld Lang Sayne and punched me in the face.

            E: Why?

            B: Because I called him a knock-kneed Scottish pillock.

            E: An unwise action, Baldrick, since Mad McAdder is a homicidal maniac.

          2. Only difficult if you are a minority and thus subject to the stop and frisk program.

    4. True story: I had my first legal drink in one of the Friday’s’ mentioned in that story. Currently drawing up my civil action in crayon.

    5. The “Southwest Eggrolls” are really dog poop.

  17. You got to know when Holder, know when to folder…

    1. Have you no shame, Sir?

    2. …know when to bomb away, and know when to drone…

      1. You never count the bodies, while you’re sitting in the press room.

        There’ll be time enough for counting, when the lying’s done.

    1. Obviously the concern that when they do this again that no-one find out about it.

  18. Mother of the year contest!!!!!




    Who wins?

    1. Like an idiot, I assumed these might be happy stories about deserving women. Damnit, Virginian.

      1. You’re definitely an idiot. Simply hovering over the links would have told you they were about lousy mothers.

        1. I didn’t say I clicked through. I just said I’d hoped to see the light of human compassion on a Friday morning.

    2. Wasn’t there a guy on H&R who used to post under “End child unemployment”?

      Srsly, the second lady is deranged in a way that the first lady is not.

  19. New developments in the printing of graphene-based electronic patterns may allow for foldable electronic devices in the near future.

    The very next development will be hard plastic shells early adopters will use to ensure their foldable electronics never actually bend.

  20. Now The Gibson Guitar Raids Make Sense

    Interestingly, one of Gibson’s leading competitors is C.F. Martin & Co. According to C.F. Martin’s catalog, several of their guitars contain “East Indian Rosewood,” which is the exact same wood in at least 10 of Gibson’s guitars. So why were they not also raided and their inventory of foreign wood seized?

    Grossly underreported at the time was the fact that Gibson’s chief executive, Henry Juszkiewicz, contributed to Republican politicians. Recent donations have included $2,000 to Rep. Marsha Blackburn, R-Tenn., and $1,500 to Sen. Lamar Alexander, R-Tenn.

    By contrast, Chris Martin IV, the Martin & Co. CEO, is a long-time Democratic supporter, with $35,400 in contributions to Democratic candidates and the Democratic National Committee over the past couple of election cycles.

    “We feel that Gibson was inappropriately targeted,” Juszkiewicz said at the time, adding the matter “could have been addressed with a simple contact (from) a caring human being representing the government. Instead, the government used violent and hostile means.”

    1. Didn’t we kinda already know this when it happened?

      I mean, I didn’t know the C.F. Martin part and his team blue donations, but Gibson’s team red contributions were common knowledge at the time. It only takes half an avocado to know its an avocado.

      Good on you bringing it back up though in light of all the other intimidating executive branch scandals.

    2. Low level employees were to blame.

      1. Just two rogues in the Memphis office.

    3. “contact (from) a caring human being representing the government”?!?

      That maudlin bullshit right there deserves prosecution on its own terms.

      1. I think he is throwing their own tropes back in their faces – what can they do, deny they are good and caring? Admit their tactics were brutish and wrong? I think he went meta on them.

      2. Yeah, I almost spit my coffee on that one.

    4. Killers and thieves use violent and hostile means — who would have thought?

  21. if you don’t investigate dirty cops, they could try to kill other cops

    1. At least the poor fellow is still getting his $118K salary.

  22. http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..-11-calls/

    I found shriek.

    1. Couldn’t be–there’s no mention of pants-shitting anywhere in the article.

  23. Feminist really hate that this kid had the nerve to shoot above his league.

    A hearty congrats is in order for the young man who has taught every prepubescent, premature-ejaculating boy that if you can’t force Kate Upton to go to prom with you, you can still get a ringer.

    But fat women are beautiful and should be loved by everyone.

    1. Wait did the kid try to kidnap Upton? No?

      So why is Jezcunt talking about force?

      If asking women out is force to you, then you’re fucking insane. As far as I know, this kid was never within a hundred miles of Kate Upton.

      1. So why is Jezcunt talking about force?

        They like to perpetuate the rape culture in America by using loaded terms like “force” when talking about women.

        1. Have they entered the realms of thoughtcrime yet? As in, fantasizing about person X is akin to rape?

          I’d be more surprised to learn that they hadn’t yet.

          1. I’ve definitively seen them object to it, saying how horrible it is and violating and stuff. I don’t think I have seen them go quite so far as to call it rape yet.

            1. Then you didn’t see the Shakesville link I posted downthread.

              1. Shakesville is literally worse than jezebel. Why do you hate yourself enough to visit that site?

          2. If “creepshots,” i.e., photos taken in public of something people can see in public, are taken as akin to rape, how could fantasies not be? (Note that I’m excluding things like upskirt photos taken by more secretive means; I’ve never understood the issue with “creepshots” that are just…pictures of women in public.)

            1. When did we go from “take a picture, it will last longer” to “taking a picture is rape”?

              I bet they all lost their minds when Louis C.K. told that religious chick that he was going to masturbate while thinking about her and there is nothing she can do about it. I imagine the butthurt was turned up to 11.

            2. People take creepshots of men too! For equality!

              1. I feel so violated. How could they do this? It’s reprehensible and disgusting.

                I mean, I’m not anywhere on that page… Aren’t I good enough looking to take creepshots of?

                1. Just have your wife objectify you by sending in a candid shot of you looking distracted. You too can be on a tumblr full of “anonymously” objectified men!

                  1. Hmm, good idea. She does like to take pictures of me. Maybe a shot of me “casually” bending over while flexing and giving a roguish smirk. Yeah, that’ll get some objectifying.

          3. No, but it is adultery.

            1. According to whom?

              1. Jesus Christ. Read your Bible once in a while why don’tcha.

                Matthew 5:28
                But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart

                1. Well, seeing as I threw my bible in the trash many years ago, I don’t think this applies to me.

                  I really don’t give a fuck what your sky daddy says about infidelity. That’s an issue that is between myself and my wife. Both of us are mature, secure, and independent enough to not care if the other wanks off to some fantasized version of another person.

                  1. Fair enough. That explains why you didn’t get the reference.

                2. Is it adultery if you’re not in a monogamous relationship?

                  1. According to the bible, yes. If you even think an impure thought about any woman who is not your wife, you have committed adultery.

                    See, Dr., I do know my bible.

                    1. Man, I am so guilty.

              2. Jimmy Carter.

      2. If asking women out is force to you,

        then I would tell the Jezzies that this is why I’d never think of asking them out, or to do anything else.

      3. You’ve got to remember: Jezzies are liberals. Liberals think advertising by fast food companies “forces” poor people to buy cheap, tasty food. Thinking that convincing someone with words is force is nothing new to them.

        1. Right. See, the social “pressure” to say yes obviated Upton’s free will (even though she managed to say no anyway)…or something.

      4. I have to say that it seems to me the only ones who have called Kate Upton names for saying “no” are Jezzies and their ilk just for the purpose of knocking down a strawman.

        I defy them to find one article that says “Kate Upton is Meanie” or some such nonsense. It doesn’t exist.

      5. Havent you heard? According to the new speech codes being forced onto Universities, asking someone out who doesnt want to be asked out is sexual assault.

        1. It’s broader than that. Sexual harassment is often defined as “unwanted sexual advances”. Which means that technically if you ask someone out and they say no, they could claim sexual harassment.

          1. That is what I said, isnt it?

            asking someone out who doesnt want to be asked out [by you] is sexual assault.

            I guess I did leave out the [] part, but I thought it was implied.

            1. You specified at “universities”.

              1. Ah, gotcha. But that was the specific recent story. But yeah, not just there.

          2. Sexual harassment is on a sliding scale in reality. That SNL bit got it perfectly. An unattractive guy asking you out is harassment. Tom Brady copping a feel is flirtatious.

            It goes both ways of course. If Kate Upton snuck into my bedroom tonight, I wouldn’t press charges. If Lindy West did it, I’d have a somewhat different response.

        2. How do you know until you ask them? No wonder it’s a thought crime.

      6. “So why is Jezcunt talking about force?”

        Apparently, Jezebel thinks women are incapable making decisions, so putting them in that position is the equivalent of force.

        And they wonder why so few women self-identify as feminists…

    2. prepubescent, premature-ejaculating boy

      What does this have to do with anything?

      Isn’t prom a post-pubescent activity?

      Is PE a real issue for “prepubescent boys”? Are prepubsecent boys even E’ing, prematurely or otherwise?

      Does she know what puberty is?

      Are 10-year old boys already making plans for prom?

      What on earth goes through these people’s heads?

      1. The problem, Marc, is assuming there was anything rational in that screechy rant; there wasn’t. Just emotion. And resentment.

        1. It’s sad. The nerds get their revenge on the cool kids by growing up, becoming less nerdy, and generally being successful. Not to mention that nerd-dom doesn’t have quite the stigma it once had.

          But nothing like this is ever going to happen for homely harpies. They’re never going to get their revenge on the cool kids. They don’t have anything to offer.

          1. Some of them get their revenge after going to work for the IRS or EEOC.

      2. I was right there with you, this kid isnt prepubescent, Im not sure what they line means.

      3. She needs someone to mansplain these things to her, apparently.

      4. What does this have to do with anything?

        That Jezzies actually want a guy to plant a money-shot on their face?

      5. They just like to throw in any insult to men they can think of, including calling him a child. But don’t you dare call an adult woman anything like girl, or refer to any of her features as an insult. And definitely don’t use the c word, because that would make you a dick.

    3. This is so pathetic.

      It’s annoying that this kid, despite a reasonable rejection from a busy model/actress, gets a second chance from an equally hot model. No one is entitled to sex because they asked nicely and/or on the interet [sic], but thanks to this kid, they might be entitled to a night with a smoking hot babe.

      Or, they still won’t be entitled to anything, but maybe someone will choose to say yes for their own advantage. From the comments: “This is emotional terrorism.” I hesitate to hate something so much that sounds so meaningless…but seriously, emotional terrorism?

      1. Emotional terrorism could be a really useful concept: whipping up an emotion in the masses to bring an enemy nation to its knees. How else to explain Justin Bieber?

        1. I am forwarding this comment to the US Army Command & General Staff Officer school. It should be included in the curriculum.

      2. What’s weird is the idea that these kids have the slightest chance to score with the models. It’s a PR event and about as impersonal as a date could get when this stuff happens.

        1. Look at all the hot HS teachers screwing boys stories.

          Sure, you are probably right, but with enough of these kind of things, one guy will eventually hit the jackpot with the 21 year old model who has a fetish for nerdy 17 year old boys.

          1. Teachers are more fucked up than models, even the coke-head models.

        2. Oh I don’t know when it was Justin Timberlake taking that Marine to the Marine Ball I could easily see him going there, she wasn’t half bad looking and being a Marine you know she’s in top physical condition

      3. Oh, I thought the comment was critical of the jezzy piece. Because this constant heckling of some kid sounds like “emotional terrorism.”

      4. What’s with all the celebrities dating teenagers? When I was a kid, you could go to jail for that.

    4. If you read the comments, you’ll find many jezzies who are skeptical of making any inferences about the guy who asked. It is a bit of a legitimate worry that a high profile “Ha, no!” Would have made Upton look like a bitch, because women are expected to be nice, but honestly, we do expect some common courtesy from other people. Or she could have ignored it. Lots of options.

    5. The chick who’s going with him instead appears to, as a first approximation, be the hottest woman who ever lived.

      1. ^^THIS^^

      2. To each their own. I would prefer Kate Upton over Nina Agdal, were such a choice ever an option to me (and both was clearly off the table).

        1. I saw the pic of Nina, thought it was supposed to be Kate, and said outloud “when did Kate Upton quit being fat?”

  24. http://www.foodnetwork.com/rec…..p-Hot-Dogs

    MMMMMMM….hot dogs.

    Grilling season starts this weekend people. What are you cooking with flame?

    1. Starts? It never ends. In the dead of winter when the days are only six hours long I’ll be out there in a parka cooking dinner. Pussy.

      1. In Texas sure, but you couldn’t buy me an expensive prime cut to grill in January in Minnesota.

        I’ll be going with brats and hot links.

        1. I’m in Maine. I’ll grill a steak in a blizzard. Pussy.

          1. You ever had snow slide off the roof and put the grill out?

            1. House is a cape and the grill is on the side. So, no.

              1. You haven’t lived my friend.

            2. I’ve had that happen. In Canada. So there!

        2. The Vikings must have some lame tailgating (if they ever had a home game in January).

          1. Some of those guys with the dressed up busses are a lot more hardcore than me. They’re Sarcasmic’s nordic relatives, I believe.

      2. When it’s the dead of winter here, I can stand outside in my shirtsleeves and grill. So, yeah, grilling season never ends, but that’s because I made correct choices in regards to climate.

        1. When it’s the dead of winter here, I can stand outside in my shirtsleeves and grill

          that’s because I made correct choices in regards to climate.

          Those are completely unrelated.

        2. Lol in the dead of winter in Boston I DID stand outside in my shirt sleeves and grill.

          But then 35 degrees is barely cold enough to need a jacket unless you are going to be outside for hours.

      3. Yep, early January is brutal here for grilling – daytime temps only get into the 70’s.

      4. One of my favorite things when I was little was when my mom would grill in the snow. And she did it in her parka, hood up. It seemed like the best food I tasted all winter.

    2. I got the jump last night with a bunch of brats.

      In a toaster oven.

      1. Why cook the brats? I use them to polish my monocles.

    3. Hey, Virginian, wanna know how I know you’re gay?

      You’re favorite grilled food is the hot dog.

      1. Your*

        sorry, I just love America. I mean, if you hate America that’s fine. Because disparaging the hot dog is like taking a dump at Arlington National Cemetery and wiping your ass with a bald eagle.


        Seriously my favorite grilled food is probably a nice brat. I just came across that slide show, and I do appreciate hot dogs.

        1. I laugh at your attempt to correct my grammar.

          Wanna know how I you are, or you’re, gay?

          You use homophones improperly!

          1. You’re favorite grilled food is the hot dog.

            Think again, GoldBRATer.

    4. To echo Sarcasmic, it never ends, even up here in the cold of Boston.

      Why I grilled several turkeys this winter one of them in the middle of a snow storm.

      In some ways it even helps to do it in the cold because it helps regulate the temperature better and makes the cooking slower.

      That said I’m sure I’ll be grilling up some ribs and steaks soon. I’ve got a leg of Lamb in the freezer which will probably see the coals as well. After that it depends on what is available.
      However I cant imagine ever wasting perfectly good wood/charcoal for something as mundane of Hot Dogs and Hamburgers

  25. Tourists Rescued after Dining Out on Iceberg

    According to P?ll Sigur?ur Vignisson, member of the Hornafj?r?ur rescue team and employee at J?kuls?rl?n, the tourists, who were from the United States, had set up a table and chairs on an ice floe with the plan of eating dinner when a gust of wind suddenly pushed the ice away from land, leaving them stranded about 10 meters from the shore.

    One of the tourists managed to jump to shore before the ice drifted too far and called 112 for help. “When we arrived it was quite comical to see them sitting on chairs and with a table on an iceberg … Yes the dinner was over,” P?ll told Iceland Review, adding that he had not noticed what they had been eating as he was too busy getting life vests to them.

    1. They weren’t smart enough to drive a couple of spikes in and lash them together?

      1. There are far too many people who have no idea how dangerous nature is and don’t think to take even the most basic and minor precautions.

        These are the sort of people who try to hand-feed wild bears and end up feeding the bear their hand.

    2. I posted this a couple of days ago. Nobody could be bothered to respond. 🙁

      1. You know who else couldn’t be bothered to respond?

        1. Lucy Steigerwald?

          1. STILL TOO SOON!

            *single tear runs, ala Iron Eyes Cody*

            1. Why did they dismiss her?

              1. wasn’t Cosmomatarianz! enough – at least that’s what I heard. (or not)

        2. The Cleveland PD?

          1. Nicely done. +2 kidnap victims

    3. He called 1-1-2 for help? Does that even work? Maybe it was all the extra pronunciation marks that made the ice break off and drift away.

  26. The story Jezebel was founded to host.

    In Defense of the Attention Whore.

    1. I can’t imagine the kind of person it takes to be a “regular” on Jezebel. I’d imagine the never ending emoting on nebulous subjects with fractured analysis and tortured logic would get oh so tiresome, but apparently not for everyone.

      1. Scary thing: Jezebel is pretty light, as far as the feminist stuff goes. I mean, they mix it up at least with celebrity and pop culture.

        You really go into it and it gets even more up its own asshole, especially if you start getting more race and gender shit. I think you need examples, Pierce. So, yesterday, I found on one of these blogs, a post titled “11 Amazing Women of Color”. Not claiming to be a comprehensive list, just more, “Hey, here are some cool feminist authors/activists you should check out.” (The best part is the style of writing the blog uses: overly flowery and descriptive yet utterly shitty. Also, they love to say how these women “articulated a language of oppression for us to use” and similar shit). Anyway, one poster jumps up and is offended how no Native Americans were on the list (well, except for the woman who identified that way, but she said “problematic and hurtful things” so she no longer gets to count). And it becomes a whole referendum on how, “Even in places like this that is trying to be inclusive, there is still the settler-colonialist mindset” etc etc. It’s academic bullshit meets high school mean girls.

        1. It’s academic bullshit meets high school mean girls.

          Well said.

    2. Also, there is a great discussion about stripping which includes people saying, “No, sweetie,” to each other.

      Seriously, these were the people who in high school would have been the biggest queen bee bitches if they could have.

      1. That’s why my favorite part of the post overall is how attention whores were “confused or damaged women who seemed to want to form their alliances with men first, and us second [or] women who didn’t concern themselves with the rules of female bonding at all, who chose instead to pursue their own kicks, their own adventures, sometimes at great risk to themselves.” They really, really hate women who don’t want to be in the clique.

        1. For a bunch of women that claim to be strong and independent, this seems very clingy and inclusive.

        2. They also seem to hate the living shit out of women who bond better than males than with females. I think that’s why the culture of nerd girls and their rise has driven them so mad, and also why they keep trying to co-opt that social group constantly.

          1. Yeah. It was not all that long ago that I realized this. I was reading something I think at Tiger Beatdown, which is one of the worst of all these sites, about how, like, women who have more male than female friends are just in it for the sexual attention or something like that and we should feel bad for them that they never had slumber parties and don’t know how to relate to their own kind but only vie for people to look at their boobs. It’s completely insane. They want to complain about, say, how women aren’t as into math as guys are because of some ingrained cultural bullshit, but then when women who are end up growing up simply knowing more men better than women, and thus being friends with them, it’s really because they were sluts all along or something.

    1. There’s a pretty mock-up poster and a lot of glitzy publicity photos, but surprisingly little content. Who are they accusing, the restaurateurs or employees within or distributors? I see a bunch of funnels, but no indication whether they were used or just confiscated.

    2. Rubbing alcohol? Really? Colored cheap vodka seemed too expensive?

      1. That’s my thinking. It seems like somebody got greedy. I’m just unconvinced it’s a ring of disaffected barbacks or restaurateurs wanting to throw away their investment on a lark.

      2. If you’re going that route you might as well just use rack brands in top shelf bottles.

      3. Yeah, isopropyl (rubbing) alcohol is toxic, so they’re totally screwed.

    3. I’ve gone to some of those places on the list, but i’ve only had beer there.

      1. *** snorts ***


        1. Hey, at least it wasn’t rubbing alcohol!
          A Sam Adams is a pretty safe bet when the co-workers want to have lunch at the place nearby.

  27. The Google Glass feature no one is talking about

    Now pretend you don’t know a single person who wears Google Glass? and take a walk outside. Anywhere you go in public ? any store, any sidewalk, any bus or subway ? you’re liable to be recorded: audio and video. Fifty people on the bus might be Glassless, but if a single person wearing Glass gets on, you ? and all 49 other passengers ? could be recorded. Not just for a temporary throwaway video buffer, like a security camera, but recorded, stored permanently, and shared to the world.

    Now, I know the response: “I’m recorded by security cameras all day, it doesn’t bother me, what’s the difference?” Hear me out ? I’m not done. What makes Glass so unique is that it’s a Google project. And Google has the capacity to combine Glass with other technologies it owns.

    1. Burkas: they’re not just for Muslims anymore!

      1. Just a matter of time.

      2. And for the security cameras – I’ve seen IR headbands that glare out your face.


        I wonder how good the Glass’ IR filter on its camera is?

      3. Heinlein foresaw that in “I Will Fear No Evil.”

    2. This is actually the only Google Glass feature I have heard of.

      1. I see another market opportunity. Something that anonymizes you on demand. Like in A Scanner Darkly.

        1. It’s not bad, but it’s missing something. It’s just not space-y enough.

          1. Well, it could involve purple hair and/or antennae.

            1. The antennae is a good call. Make you look like an alien.

              1. I have another business idea. We start broadcasting signals into space (by various radio and optical means) offering to rent the Earth to benevolent superaliens (interview required). No killing us off, stealing our water, or eating us, except if we agree because we need the money.

                1. What about stealing our womenz?

                  1. Oh, right, thanks. None of that, either, except by mutually agreed contracts.

                2. We’re already broadcasting signals into space informing the aliens that we are prosperous, defenseless and ready to be ruled. It’s just a matter of time.

          2. In all seriousness, I bet Google comes up with a scheme to allow people to pay to be eliminated from recordings, at least the non-public variety.

            1. “And if you pay us promptly, the world will never have to know…the name of your lover in Brighton!”

    3. Suddenly that Butlerian jihad is looking pretty good, isn’t it?

    4. Google Contacts*: Every one night stand will be posted (possibly streaming live) on the internet.

      Deal with it.

      *not that far away

  28. For all those who are fantasizing about Obama going Bullworth, Amazon is coming through. The complete West Wing collection is the gold box deal of the day.

    1. I remember once having a discussion with a guy who thought that the West Wing captured the reality of American politics perfectly.

      1. Did he recover from his concussion?

    2. Liberal Porn. Where bright, articulate government officials come up with solutions to crises after crises with just a few monuments of thought before they go onto the next. Hunger in Africa, low test scores in Mississippi, war in the Middle East, no problem they have all attended the Kennedy School of Government..

      1. I thought at first you’d mistakenly typed monuments instead of moments, but it’s not far off the truth given the arrogance of progressives.

    3. Oh, that’s not porn for Presidents.

      That’s porn for poli-sci majors.

  29. Rand Paul Responds to Obama’s Drone-Policy Speech

    I’m glad the President finally acknowledged that American citizens deserve some form of due process. But I still have concerns over whether flash cards and PowerPoint presentations represent due process; my preference would be to try accused U.S. citizens for treason in a court of law.

    1. Sure, but what does Roger Clemens think?

      1. It’s worth repeating–it’s a great quote.

    2. I think Reason covered that already.

  30. Maine lawmakers follow the lead of Texas in moving to require warrants to track people’s locations via their cellphones

    Nothing a guaranteed rubber stamp for the flimsiest of reasons can’t handle.

  31. More unrealistic fantasy than Lord of the Rings:

    How America Became a Third World Country.

    1. Grants for scientific research ended, and there was no more science.

      Public schools closed, and there were no more schools.

      Food inspection stopped, and there was no more food.

      Holy derp.

      1. That all sounds great, how’d I miss it.

        1. You were probably too busy reading Bastiat.

        2. I like how national parks close. You know, because huge expanses of wilderness can be closed by sequester.

          1. Well, all the remaining money in the budget had to go to provide the police force to keep people out of the closed expanses of wilderness . . . because they’re closed you see, you can’t have people wandering around if the park is closed.

            1. Anarchy is one thing, but people being free to gambol? No.

          2. I feel the same. It’s a bunch of woods. People can manage in the woods just fine without some ranger in a hut.

        3. You were foraging for hayseeds?

    2. I guessed correctly from the headline.

    3. Fantasy by it’s nature is unrealistic. That is just stupid.

    4. Written by a veteran community organizer and a research analyst who doesnt look old enough to have her pussy haired over yet.

      One guess who these two voted for.

      1. Jill Stein?

    5. Funny then that the US cities that actually are turning into third world countries are the ones with too much government.

  32. Stockholm rioting continues for fifth night
    Swedish police seek reinforcements after youths set ablaze cars and attack property and schools in poorer suburbs of capital

    About 30 cars were set on fire in poorer districts in north-western and south-western parts of the Swedish capital on Thursday night, with rioters causing widespread damage to property, including schools. However, a police spokesman said the overnight violence was less intense than in previous nights.

    Despite Sweden’s reputation for equality, the rioting has exposed a faultline between a well-off majority and a minority, often young people with immigrant backgrounds, who cannot find work, lack education and feel marginalised.

    1. Witness our future, people.

      1. Nah. *We* have the decency to specify what kinds of immigrants are rioting.

        1. It isn’t even going to be immigrants for us. Immigrants can take low-paying jobs. It’s going to be college kids.

          1. Nah, it’s going to be people with brand new masters degrees.

            1. I am about to finish my Master’s degree… LET THE MOTHERFUCKER BURNNNN!!!!

          2. No, it won’t be college kids, at least not in the long run, although they’ll likely be the ones to get the ball rolling. If the shit really did hit the fan, the latte-sipping SWPL hordes would melt in less than 15 minutes.

      2. Although many Americans have firearms with which to protect their property from rioters.

    2. Sweden, we hardly knew ye.

      1. I feel sorry for the ancient Nords, after that strong Viking tradition, their descendants won’t even put down a riot with proper zeal. The most one killing would have sparked before would be a blood fued or wehrgild. This sort of unrest would have had the Jarl’s underlings lop off his head and put it down themselves.

    3. “the overnight violence was less intense than in previous nights.”

      In other words, they’re running out of unburned cars.

  33. An AOPA article from last week about a private pilot who was stopped twice during a cross country trip and had his aircraft invasively searched has generated responses from a number of pilots who have experienced similar searches as well as a non-response from the Customs and Border Patrol, whose agents are suspected of making the stops and searches (the agents did not present ID to the pilot searched).

    From the AOPA’s article, it appears that some pilots have had their planes so intrusively searched that the planes were no longer airworthy after the agents removed components from the planes that,under FAA regulations, must only be reinstalled by licensed Airframe and Powerplant mechanics. This would result in a pilot having to call a licensed mechanic to the airfield where he was stopped to reassemble the airplane according to FAA regulations.

    The AOPA article also states that CBP has acquired access to FAA and military tracking systems that they use to determine which planes are “suspicious.” No information was provided on how many (if any) of these searches have resulted in finding contraband of any kind. The AOPA says it is continuing to investigate and to provide some legal help to pilots who are filing FOIA requests to find out more about their own searches. CBP has stonewalled, saying they cannot release details of individual investigations.

    1. The FAA sucks. I wanted to fly once, then I saw how intense the regs are, and I dropped the idea.

      You don’t need a license for an ultralight though, and light sport aircraft can be flown with a sport pilot’s license, which is a lot less onerous.

      1. Flight Gear Flight Simulator.

        It’s free; you don’t die when you fuck up and crash; you can fly when you want; no charge for gas or for maintenance; your life insurance rate is *much* lower; etc.

    2. Wait til we find out all these pilots are republican donors.

    3. the agents did not present ID to the pilot searched

      And the pilot didn’t photograph or otherwise record them, right? Which makes it hard to make a believable case in the press or in the courts.

      My sympathy is with the pilot, here, and I’m sorry the general aviation crowd is getting this wakeup call, but they’re lucky it’s taken this long for them to feel the bootheel.

      Also, I’d have more sympathy for the general aviation community if the CAP weren’t a volunteer auxiliary for the WoD.

      1. Holy shit dude, the general aviation crowd has been pissed at the feds for decades. They just lack the numbers of the NRA to get any kind of reform passed.

      2. Sorry, Vag, didn’t know that. I disassociated myself from GA decades ago.

        1. I mean, you have to get your damn blood pressure checked to fly a plane. But you can steer an SUV through a school zone with a test any retard can pass.

          oh shit, I better not give them ideas.

          1. a test any retard can pass

            Time to break this one out…

            Wilford Brimley: [on tape] Hi. This is Wilford Brimley. Welcome to Retardation: A Celebration. Now, hopefully with this book, I’m gonna dispel a few myths, a few rumors. First off, the retarded don’t rule the night. They don’t rule it. Nobody does. And they don’t run in packs. And while they may not be as strong as apes, don’t lock eyes with ’em, don’t do it. Puts ’em on edge. They might go into berzerker mode; come at you like a whirling dervish, all fists and elbows. You might be screaming “No, no, no” and all they hear is “Who wants cake?” Let me tell you something: They all do. They all want cake.

  34. Shakesville on Star Trek.

    Again, women’s bodies and men’s bodies are not objectified in the same way, and that is a truly contemptible argument that anyone should be embarrassed to make in the year of our lord Jesus Jones two thousand and thirteen. Even if they were (AND THEY ARE NOT), the scenes of Marcus in her underwear and Kirk in bed with a naked woman (who has no other role in the film) are fundamentally different in that Kirk breaches Marcus’ consent by looking her in direct contravention of her explicit request that he not look. That’s not showing Kirk to be a “womanizer”; it’s showing Kirk to be a predator who’s committing a sexual assault.

    1. The author simply wishes someone would objectify her.

      1. As a bounus, the new feminist theory that “the camera lingering on a naked man is a male power fantasy, and as such is completely different from the camera lingering on a naked women” makes an appearance.

        1. I’ll buy that, actually. I seriously question the draw Star Trek has for women wanting to see Chris Pine cavort around with Zachary Quinto vs. men wanting to see a virile and much-beloved Kirk in action scene after action scene.

          1. Huh? Seriously? The Trek reboots are like the first time there is any hotness for women to really get into. Seeing a virile and much-beloved hottie character in action scene after action scene is fun for us too.

            1. I’m not saying it isn’t a draw, just that it’s not a premeditated attention grab at female viewers to which men are apathetic. I buy the idea of “power fantasy,” such as it is. I would prefer seeing Chris Pine to, say, Rowan Atkinson channeling his humorously gutless Blackadder character. My question in response to the Jezebelian wannabe who wrote the article is: So what? Embodying a forceful, likeable Kirk with definite sex appeal does not in any sense engender rapey desires.

              1. Well, I don’t think men are apathetic, but I do think it’s a premeditated attention grab at female viewers. I think we agree on that.

                I don’t think her complaint is that it actually engenders rapey desires, just that the “camera’s gaze” is a “male gaze.” Blah blah automatically bad blah blah.

              2. I buy the idea of “power fantasy,” such as it is.

                And women don’t want to be attractive and desired? That cuts both ways. And they were referring to the gratuitous Cumberbatch shower scene.

                1. gratuitous Cumberbatch shower scene.

                  Now Nikki HAS to go see the movie. Good job, Coeus.

                  1. Actually I was going to comment that that combination of words simply makes no sense.

                    But I mean, it’s not like it’s full frontal or something…

                    1. WHY WOULD YOU CUT THAT?!? (Thanks)

                    2. Hey, we didn’t get full frontal with Alice. Bra and panties are hot, but it’s not nudity.

                    3. Well, I’ve never understood what made underwear any different from a bathing suit, so I don’t even know why the character would have told Kirk not to look, let alone how this is remotely exploitative.

                    4. Well, I’ve never understood what made underwear any different from a bathing suit

                      Me neither. My guess would be “intention” reasons. While we were teenagers, a group of friends went swimming in the nearby river. My sister didn’t have a bathing suit, so she went in her underwear. It was big thick granny panties and a padded bra that covered most of her boobs. Our mom FLIPPED out on her for “prancing around in her undewear” in front of boys. However, later, when we all went for a dip in the local pool, there was absolutely no problem with my sister wearing a skimpy bikini that showed off half her ass and most of her boobs.

                      I still to this day can’t wrap my head around the “reasoning”

              3. I dunno Captain Edmund Blackadder might be a most interesting commander of the Enterprise.

            2. There are also a TON of lingering shots for Kirk/Spock fans.

              1. Dammit, Goldwater, now you’re making me want to actually go to the theater to see it. And that’s a fucking hassle.

                1. It’s the best Trek movie in a long time.

                  1. How high a bar is that?

                    1. Oh, come on! Insurrection was a GREAT movie.

                      *ducks and runs away*

      2. I’m beginning to think Jezebel is like a false flag operation women use to weed out the betas, with all the “don’t look at me, don’t admire me, don’t ask me out” bullshit. Since only the betas will believe that’s what women actually want, they’ll stop approaching them. It’s genius!

        1. “don’t look at me, don’t admire me, don’t ask me out” bullshit.

          But then when you don’t do those things, it’s because you are a misogynistic pig who doesn’t think of them as attractive due to your patriarchal views of beauty.

          You’re fucked either way with these types, but not in the good way. That would be rape.

    2. I actually was agreeing until I got to the bold.

      Creepy? Yes. Jackass? Yes. Pervert? Yes. Assault? No.

      1. You know what would solve this? No more new Star Trek movies.

        And before you ask, no, I don’t know how I became a genius.

        1. no, I don’t know how I became a genius.

          I think it’s more that you never became a genius.

        2. It helps never having watched much of TOS, but I’m not wholly averse to the new films. It’s action schlock, and it forcibly hibernates parts of my brain, and the first was undoubtedly better than the sequel, and I probably wouldn’t admit to it in public, but I was never bored watching them.

          1. I was never bored watching them.

            That’s what I thought too. The first one wasn’t what I was hoping for, but I knew what I was getting into with Into Darkness, and I had fun watching it. Good enough.

          2. It’s not “TOS” — the show was called Star Trek. Save the acronyms for the sequels and spin-offs.

        3. You mean a law passed against all Star Trek movies (or any that would objectify wymmin at all).

        4. It wasn’t law school, because that reduces your IQ by ten points. I know.

          1. You must have gone to a better school than I did – mine went down 15.

            1. I bought IQ insurance.

              1. +1 long policy filled with legalese.

            2. Yeah, i was going to say ProL is being a bit generous here.

    3. So, is this person saying that merely asking someone to not look at you *legally* requires them not to?

      Because I would like to ask all of the security camera operators to stop looking at me and not review recording of me.

      1. And quite frankly – if you don’t really want a man to look at you while you undress then don’t undress somewhere he can get a look at you.

        I, for example, have no problem closing the bathroom door.

        1. That’s why the camera was installed ON the back of the door, you fool! I’m calling closing the door consent!

        2. Yeah, her changing there really didn’t have any (in story) reason.

          1. I’m pretty sure that scene was the reason she was in the movie.

            1. You mean it wasn’t because of her superb acting abilities? I’d have sworn she was a shoo in for an oscar.

            2. I said “in story”!

    4. Holy cow. If she thinks Kirk is bad, I hope she never watches Game of Thrones.

  35. Insured losses as a result of the Oklahoma tornadoes may top $5 billion, say experts.

    Insured Taxpayer losses as a result of the Oklahoma tornadoes may top $5 billion, say experts

    FTFY. C’mon, we all know its going to happen.

    1. Hey, it’s only fair that you climate-changers pick up the tab for *uninsured* losses.

      1. According to Sheldon Whitehouse the OK tornados were just punishment from Gaia for those rednecks causing global warming.


        1. Do these people really think that big tornadoes in the central US in the late spring are a new thing?

          1. Yes, the fact that that part of the country is known as “Tornado Alley” is just coincidence.

            1. If only they’d get rid of trailer parks.

              Those things are fucking tornado *magnets*.

            2. Also, the fact that tornadic activity has declined in the last twenty years is irrelevant.

              1. Change in weather patterns? Climate change.

          2. That’s the only reason I have reservations about keystone xl, no one has given me details about the tornado protections to prefent the loss of valuable oil through tornado alley. Information about what they plan to do to keep the pipline intact would go far to sway me.

            1. Can’t just have the pipeline underground?

              1. Didn’t see any mention that they planned to – not to say that this isn’t the plan, as I’ve said, I haven’t seen the relevent details. I hoped someone here might know.

                1. “I hoped someone here might know.”


                  1. My sarcasm meter is probably broken, but why would Keystone be any more at risk from tornadoes than any of the other literally tens of thousands of miles of pipeline that criss-cross the lower Mid-West?

                    Tornadoes are amazingly powerful, but even an F-5 can’t dig out a 36 inch transmission line from under its 3-6 feet of dirt.

  36. and the Red Wings shut out the Blackhawks 2-0

    Honestly, I’m surprised the DRW are ahead 3-1 in the series.

    1. I’m not, all that deep dish will eventually weigh you down.

    2. I’m not saying it’s the worse goal ever, but I think the Tuuka banana peel goal is the worst one I’ve ever seen.

    3. Does Pittsburgh close it out tonight?

      1. Fingers crossed.

  37. Wolves in the Throne Room

    Hailing from Washington state, WITTR are a great example of good, imaginative American Black Metal. Using all of the general themes and conventions of black metal (nature, mysticism, man as individual, lots of tremolo guitar work, blast beats, and harsh vocals), combined with integrating a heavier post rock sentiment, WITTR transgresses European black metal by both adhering to many its conventions while simultaneously denying them and replacing them with American aesthetics, using the lore of the American northwest as their guide. Many would (not without good reason) label WITTR as environmental crazies, though rather than harping on the evil man does to nature (as does a band like Gojira), they speak of man’s communion with nature and how we might find ourselves as individuals within it (very Thoreau). “Thuja Magnus Imperium” is the opening track off of their latest album Celestial Lineage.


    1. Not metal. Most definitely not metal.

      1. Robert Mitchum?!? You hate us, don’t you.

    2. You kinda sound like Patrick Bateman discussing Phil Collins dude. More than a little disconcerting.

  38. New developments in the printing of graphene-based electronic patterns may allow for foldable electronic devices in the near future.

    Another thing that’s been just a few years away for like twenty years.

    1. One day you’ll wipe your ass with an I-Phone 9.

      1. -“Siri, perform stool analysis.”

        -“There are 15 hair stylists in your area.”

      2. Instead of recycling, when you get your Iphone 10, save some money on toilet paper by using your Iphone 9 for the one thing its really good for.

  39. Second tropical storm/hurricane will be Barry from this year’s list. Some one in NOAA is going to be looking for a new job.

  40. For an writer who spends so much time hating on evopsych and PUA you’d think that she wouldn’t be promoting studies that fit the theory so well. But she does purposely get it wrong, so maybe she just hasn’t been paying attention.

    1. What’s “an writer”?

      1. Maybe the author is Welsh and thinks of w as a vowel.

      2. Getting a ton of shit for the typos today. I don’t have preview. Fuck you all.

        1. Removing your e-mail address from your profile might work. It did for me.

  41. Seems pretty convenient that people would throw the Obama going Bullworth idea out there a few days before Obama would tell left-leaning reporters what they want to hear in a speech about press freedom and drone strikes. It’s like they may be attempting to present the idea that Obama has always been against the things his administration is doing and now he’s going to speak out against it. He ran against Congress in 2012, looks like he’s going to govern against his own administration in 2013.

    1. It’s absurd that anyone listens to a word he says. He’s a big bag of lying wind.

  42. Immigration Bill ‘Could Create DMZ’ Like Korea

    “The bill doesn’t say it clear out, but in my opinion It creates a DMZ like North and South Korea, except [it’s] between the U.S. and Mexico?our third largest trading partner,” said Mark Noferi, an immigration law professor at Brooklyn Law School.

    “The bill has a provision that extends the concept of ‘the border’ to 100 miles [within] the southern U.S. border, but I think that DMZ could conceivably extend along our northern border as well, through most of Vermont as it now stands,” Noferi said.

    1. That provision notwithstanding, the “border” *already* extends to with in 100 mi of the boundary between the US and either neighboring country.

      If I’m reading the original law right, CBP (who don’t need warrants to search at border crossings or “near” the border) can actually come in and search my home at will.

      1. In fairness, the hoards of Mexican lawn manicurists bunking in your basement might justify it.

        1. Also, the hordes.

          1. His hoard of hordes.

            1. his whored hoard of hordes

              1. Approved by the Whored Hoard of Hordes Board.

  43. DETROIT (WJBK) – Officials say the Detroit Institute of Arts’ collection could be sold to help satisfy creditors if the financially troubled city of Detroit seeks bankruptcy protection.

    Yes, we can’t pay our bills but we own an art collection.


  44. State trooper who was cleared after tasing a handcuffed woman and putting her into a coma was once again cleared after shooting another man.

    A 13-year patrol employee, Cole has been the subject of 10 internal affairs investigations.

    New professionalism.

    1. I wonder how long of a paid vacation he got for that one.

      1. Fuck, I need a vacation… hey dispatch, I know there are closer units available, but let me take this one. Thanks.


    2. You don’t know the totality of the fact pattern in any of those cases.


  45. Ignore the source and just read the story.

    Reddit Users Attempt to Shame Sikh Woman, Get Righteously Schooled

    Actually worked out pretty well.

    1. I’m not sure whether I find reddit or jezbel more retarded.

      1. Reddit has /aww and /gonewild, so it’s worth something at least. Jezebel just has Lindy West.

    2. I am a little suspicious. That whole scenario fits their narrative a little too well.

  46. Some unions now angry about health care overhaul

    But some unions leaders have grown frustrated and angry about what they say are unexpected consequences of the new law ? problems that they say could jeopardize the health benefits offered to millions of their members.

    The issue could create a political headache next year for Democrats facing re-election if disgruntled union members believe the Obama administration and Congress aren’t working to fix the problem.

    “It makes an untruth out of what the president said, that if you like your insurance, you could keep it,” said Joe Hansen, president of the United Food and Commercial Workers International Union. “That is not going to be true for millions of workers now.”

    unexpected? *snort*

    1. Somehow I doubt any of those unions are of government-sector workers.

    2. “It makes an untruth out of what the president said, that if you like your insurance, you could keep it”

      Ugh, so much racism on display. What is this 1953 Jackson, MS? I mean, to think that a black guy can’t further regulate 1/6th of the economy and force Americans to buy insurance without some union boss getting all up in his chili! Just shows how far we have to go really.

    3. The IRS union wants obamacare exemption.


      That’s right, the people that will be enforcing Obamacare demand to be exempt from it.

      1. Everyone who likes obamacare has an exception.

        1. It’s actually not such a bad law, if you don’t have to follow it.

  47. Well this is it for a while. It’s been interesting hanging out here for the past couple years, hopefully once I get settled in to my new job I’ll be able to waste time here again. I’ll leave you all with the words of a dead German:

    “I don’t care how you do it, build some giant ovens or something!”

    1. You really know how to stretch out a goodbye, sheesh. The “attention whore” article is ^^^thattaway^^^

    2. Just kidding. Here’s something more appropriate:

      “Have a good distrust today ye, higher men, ye enheartened ones! Ye open-hearted ones! And keep your reasons secret! For this today is that of the populace.

      What the populace once learned to believe without reasons, who could –
      refute it to them by means of reasons?

      And on the market-place one convinceth with gestures. But reasons make the populace distrustful.

      And when truth hath once triumphed there, then ask yourselves with good distrust: “What strong error hath fought for it?”

      Be on your guard also against the learned! They hate you, because they are unproductive! They have cold, withered eyes before which every bird is unplumed.

      Such persons vaunt about not lying: but inability to lie is still far from being love to truth. Be on your guard!

      Freedom from fever is still far from being knowledge! Cold spirits I do not believe in. He who cannot lie, doth not know what truth

      1. Coulda just thrown an H.L. Mencken quote at us or something. Anyway, enjoy your new job and your 15th anniversary.

        1. Here are a few:

          The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.

          A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.

          Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

          It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.

    3. Travel safely, $park?!

    4. You won’t be missed.

      1. That’s okay, he won’t be gone long.

  48. http://www.mediaite.com/tv/cod…..tmo-today/

    Well Code Pink is apparently staying true to their principles. Good for them.

    1. They’ve been sticking to them for a decade now. They never stopped, unlike practically every other liberal in America.

      1. I don’t know – I don’t recall hearing much from them during O’s first term, although I could be mistaken.

        1. I’m not sure, but it wouldn’t surprise me if they were protesting all along but the media just ignored them once the lightbringer ascended.

      2. And part of that could be due to media filtering…

    2. Pretty thoughtful of them to wait until the second term though. Now they get to say “see, we don’t care who is in office!” Once they get an army of rabid Cindy Sheehan worshipers to perform a week long protest at Martha’s Vineyard, then I’ll be impressed.

      1. They’ve stayed consistent. Sheehan was even on the ballot against Obama and she ran against Pelosi for congress in ’07. Hell they have protested at Martha’s Vineyard.

        1. I stand corrected. Well done pinkies.

    3. I am confident this legacy problem can be solved

      Ha! Stay on message, Barry. Stay on message.

    4. I think despise the anti war crowd more than anyone. If they had any principles they would have protested any use of the military for the last 10+ years. There should be a protest outside the White House whenever we are using Military force.

      1. They’re 100% consistent. They protest every time a Republican uses military force.

      2. What anti-war crowd?

  49. http://mynorthwest.com/11/2280…..ro.twitter

    I found Epi.

    1. My boss is leaving the company to move back to Seattle next week. I’m not sure if I should warn him about driving on the bridges there, or about Epi.

      1. Wait, I thought Epi was a NJ Guido.

        1. Why not both?

      2. See, the sequester WAS harmful!

    2. Good.

      What happened to R C Dean?

      1. It’s the current H&R mystery. May have even overtaken “What happened to Lucy?”

        1. Yeah and what happened to Groovus?

          1. Epi was making inquiries but he too has seemingly disappeared. None dare call it conspiracy

            1. I’m thinking they’ve all GG, if you catch my drift.

              1. There’s no wifi in the Gulch?

              2. Maybe Holder is rounding us up.

          2. Groovus was snared by a hot Ukranian doctor. He wrote about it during the early stages of assimilation. At this point I imagine he has been completely absorbed into the collective and is lost to us.

            1. we are clearing diminishing in numbers.

            2. It turned out she was a doctor/porn star, and they’re now making films together (mostly porn versions of Dune). So, in a very real way, you see more of the doctor now than ever before.

              1. Wait, I thought the miniseries was the porn version of Dune?

                My first girlfriend and her parents were into sci-fi. They lived about 10 minutes from my college so we would go there and watch stuff together on Friday nights. That included the first time I watched Dune… That was not a good choice.

                1. Somebody needs to give me a good Dune miniseries. It’s too big for a single film, and screw multiple movies for one novel.

              2. Acting out Gurney’s sordid affair with Lady Jessica?

                1. Paul and Alia, I think.

                    1. No, they’re catering to the incest fetish.

                    2. You misread that. It’s “insect fetish,” specifically the strange goings-on among the Tleilaxu axlotl mothers.

              3. Most excellent/horrifying

      2. Dean took a new job or promo in Tucson. He is probably busy.

        Groovus hopefully is reveling in carnal pleasure with his new ukrainian girlfriend.

  50. Frenchman busted shopping for Chianti and fava beans.

    On searching the house police discovered the elderly woman’s legs in the freezer, and found her on liver on a shelf in the fridge, French news site Le point reported.

    1. I’ve heard of “keeping it in the family” but that’s disgusting.

  51. “The leader of a United Nations inquiry into the use of drones says he welcomes President Obama’s speech vowing to keep killing people with drones, but to eventually wind things down.”

    There will never be serious political fallout from drone use. This is one of the things that scares me about their employment. As long as we don’t put “boots on the ground” a large part of the population will not have a problem with drones. This was obvious during the election when Romney could not criticize Obama’s drone policy. It was too popular and he would have just continued it anyway.
    This is the same reason there was almost no outcry against the administration’s support for the UN’s Libya campaign. There were no American ground troops involved (which turned out to be a lie) so everything’s good.
    What most people don’t realize is that collateral damage is going to be higher when there is no one on the ground “lazing” a target. A Hellfire missile is very accurate in the sense that it will hit what you aim it at but it is not a precise anti personnel weapon like a sniper’s bullet. It was designed to defeat tanks for fucks sake.

    1. Most of the anti-war movement in the US since the 60s has been either team blue partisanship or a reaction to US casualties. A democrat murder droning president negates both of those factors.

  52. http://dailycaller.com/2013/05…..-for-good/

    Good luck getting exposure and media sympathy, Chicago Teachers. Let Scott Walker try and pull something like this and you’d see the journalists fall all over each other to froth with outrage.

    1. Karen Lewis, president of the Chicago Teachers Union and an ardent critic of Mayor Emanuel, has promised to force the mayor out of office over the school closings.

      I actually wouldn’t be surprised if this loses him reelection (if he ever hoped to get it). Black people here are unbelievably pissed off. This is being so widely perceived as racist, and Emanuel as racist for pushing it, it’s kind of insane.

  53. Dear Wayne Allyn Root:



    1. That attention whore? He ain’t trying to help. He ain’t never tried to help.

      1. You clearly did not read the Jezebel link upthread that explains “attention whore” is a gendered term that is never applied to men because men are expected to be attention whores and there behavior as such is approved.

        1. Well, except for the part about it being patently untrue. In fact, I’ll go so far as to say that I think I’ve heard that about men more than about women.

          1. Yeah, me too.

            1. We’re both thinking of Episiarch as the resident attention whore, aren’t we?

              1. “attention” whore? Why the “attention” part?

                1. It’s merely one of the many facets of his whoreness.

          2. Its comparable, but my experience has been to hear it used to reference women more, but guys get it a lot too. There’s a reason mouthy guys at school aren’t called “class clown” anymore. Its because they’re called attention whores despite the feminist elitists best efforts to ignore the versatility of the phrase.

          3. Waaaaaay more. Except for the old meme with the girl doing the cartwheel at the beach, I think it’s pretty much ALWAYS been a dude when “attention whore” is used, in my experience.

      2. Okay, is “STOP PRETENDING TO HELP” better?

        1. Okay, is “STOP PRETENDING TO HELP” better?

          It is better, but I prefer


          It really is the best kindness that Wayne Allen Root could do for us.

  54. If Moonbeam can’t find a lefty cause, by damn he’ll make one!
    “Here are 520 scientists from throughout the world making a very strong statement, with as little waffling as possible, about Earth’s environmental problems, and we’re putting it in the hands of policy makers so they can understand and start formulating solutions,”

    Buried inside the dead-tree version of the Chron (no link):
    Headline: “Scientists push urgent action to save planet”
    …”scientists as UC Berkeley and Stanford led a call by more than 500 of their international colleagues…”
    No names, no specialties, and what the hell does that sentence even mean?

    All I can add is: ‘Malthusians of the world unite! You have only your credibility to loose!’

Please to post comments

Comments are closed.