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A.M. Links: Former IRS Chief to Testify at House Hearing, Federal Oversight of LAPD Ends, Venezuela Needs TP

Ed Krayewski | 5.17.2013 9:00 AM

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  • this is beavis, those are buttheads
    Film Roman

    Former IRS chief Steve Miller, whose resignation was planned before the agency's political targeting practices came to light but announced afterward as a sign the administration took the scandal seriously, will testify before the House Ways & Means Committee later today.

  • Democratic strategists have descended on the White House to help the Democratic strategists in the White House deal with the snowballing scandals they're facing. Spoiler alert: they'll probably blame Republicans.
  • More than a decade of federal oversight of the LAPD ended this week by a decree from a judge and not because the federal monitors concluded the department no longer needed it.
  • President Obama pledged to end the "scourge" of sexual assault in the military while acknowledging there was no "silver bullet."
  • The U.S. military may put boots on the ground in Libya while trying to capture or kill the alleged Benghazi attackers.
  • CIA director John Brennan made an unannounced trip to Israel, meeting with Benjamin Netanyahu and other officials to talk about the situation in Syria.
  • Venezuela is facing a toilet paper shortage. The government blames the opposition. Sound familiar?

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NEXT: Nigerian Forces Attack Islamic Extremist Camps

Ed Krayewski is a former associate editor at Reason.

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  1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    Democratic strategists have descended on the White House to help the Democratic strategists in the White House deal with the snowballing scandals they’re facing.

    Political concerns, the most important thing right now.

    1. Capt Ace Rimmer   12 years ago

      Political concerns, the only thing ever.

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      I blame BOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!!!

    3. Cyto   12 years ago

      The initial strategy already seems to be in place. Blogs, comments and ‘analysts’ all seem to be spontaneously agreeing that this is all just a republican distraction from the important work of creating jobs and helping the economy.

      1. Night Elf Mohawk   12 years ago

        Because the fucker has been doing wonders creating job and helping the economy up to his point. Bottom line, anything that keeps this prick from focusing on his view of the economy is a gain for the economy.

      2. NoVAHockey   12 years ago

        “there’s no there, there. and if it were there, republican’s put it there. so there.”

  2. db   12 years ago

    I sent this in to 24/7 a couple hours ago but don’t see it here yet so:

    An article at AOPA (Aircraft Owners and Pilots Association) details a disturbing detention and search of a pilot and his plane by agents that may have been Customs and Border Patrol (they offered no identification).

    During a coast-to-coast trip,the pilot was subjected to two “random” ramp checks, one of which resulted in the extensive and invasive search of his aircraft. “Ramp checks” are typically performed at random by FAA personnel and are generally limited to inspecting the aircraft’s required paperwork and the pilot’s credentials. According to the pilot,who claims to be a teetotaler,the agents tried to get him to admit to possessing a small amount of marijuana, which was never found during the search. He also claims the agents suggested to him that the search may have been related to the fact that he had landed in Colorado, which recently legalized marijuana, earlier in the trip.

    The whole story is disturbing and AOPA is working with the pilot to file FOIA requests to learn more about the searches and the agents that performed them. AOPA says they have received other reports of similar searches and are calling on pilots to report them so they may be brought to light.

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      Sounds like the agents are behind in their quota, or someone is pissed at the pilot and made an anonymous phone call…

      1. db   12 years ago

        Yeah, it could have been a SWATting, but if you read the article there are some concerning bits indicating other possibilities.

  3. sarcasmic   12 years ago

    How fast food outlets show their food… and how they really look (and you wouldn’t even fit a Big Mac that large in its box!)

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..e-box.html

    1. some guy   12 years ago

      Big Macs fit so perfectly in their boxes that it is impossible to pick them up without getting special sauce on your fingers. They’re designed that way so that your fingers will enticingly smell of special sauce for the rest of the day.

      1. Rasilio   12 years ago

        What, you mean Thousand Island Dressing?

        If I wanted that I’d just go to the Grocery store and buy a bottle.

        1. WTF   12 years ago

          Or just make your own.

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Food never looks as good in real life as it does on any of those cooking shows, either. But those aren’t the class of people we want to go after.

      1. Rasilio   12 years ago

        I have been to quite a few restaurants where it does in fact look that good.

        But yeah when you cook it yourself it never looks like that

        1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

          But yeah when you cook it yourself it never looks like that

          Speak for yourself.

          /former restaurant cook

          1. Ted S.   12 years ago

            /former restaurant cook

            Fry guy at McDonald’s?

            1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

              Fry guy at McDonald’s?

              As a matter of fact, I did work for McDonald’s while in high school.

              One of my last cooking job was saute station at an Italian restaurant that could seat more than 500 people. Had an eight burner stove, sometimes all of them going at the same time. Flames shooting up into the hood. Some evenings I would drink a whole pitcher of water and not need to use the restroom. Sweat it all out.
              Good times. Good times.

            2. Arkansaustrian Economics   12 years ago

              I worked at McD’s in high school, in the mid-to-late 90’s. If we served a burger that looked like the one in the linked story, we would have gotten our asses chewed. Second time, we would get our walking papers.

              I’m obviously not claiming every McD’s is like that. My first day, I about got my head ripped off for not filling a fry box to overflowing – nowadays, it seems like I’m lucky if I get one where the fries come up over the top at all.

        2. Old Man With Candy   12 years ago

          MY food looks that good. Better than in most of those cooking shows, at least since the Food Network dumped most of their real chefs to hire “entertainers.”

          1. RBS   12 years ago

            Food Network dumped most of their real chefs to hire “entertainers.”

            They still have some decent stuff on during the day, not as good as it used to be but it’s there.

            1. Rasilio   12 years ago

              You mean they have shows on the food network that are not competitions?

              The only think I ever watch on there are Chopped and the Next________ (Iron Chef, Food Network Star, etc) competitions.

              However over on cooking channel I will watch Bitchin Kitchen on occasion because Nadia G is hillarious

              1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

                One word: Giada. *drool*

                1. Old Man With Candy   12 years ago

                  Giada looks like a Tootsie Roll Pop with fake tits.

              2. RBS   12 years ago

                Or Triple D? Hard to believe but they do, like Giada.

                1. $park?   12 years ago

                  My son and I like Triple D. Restaurant: Impossible is good sometimes too.

                  1. Restoras   12 years ago

                    I watch Triple D with my kids, and they like Chopped though it isn’t my favorite.

                    I miss Good Eats.

                    1. Old Man With Candy   12 years ago

                      Best cooking show ever on that network: Taste.

                    2. RBS   12 years ago

                      I watch it too, I was just pointing out that it is on all the time. Good Eats comes on at like 11:30am.

              3. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

                However over on cooking channel I will watch Bitchin Kitchen on occasion because Nadia G is hillarious

                Yeah, Nadia’s awesome. She was eliminated early in one of the celebrity Chopped episodes, and I suspect it was because the judges were afraid of her smart mouth. The dish she made was just fine.

    3. Suthenboy   12 years ago

      I once asked a BK cashier, right before I ordered, “Hey, does the food look just like the pictures on the menu?”

      The dolt just gave me a blank stare. Behind her, a skinny white girl about 17 who was filling the fries, overheard me. She almost fell on the floor laughing. The 30 something cashier had no idea what I was saying.

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        The 17 year old has since gone on the greener pastures. The 30 year old is now the store manager.

        1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

          That high up? I’d have guessed shift manager.

          1. Restoras   12 years ago

            I stand corrected.

            1. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

              “I started out washing floors just like you guys. Now I’m up to lettuce. Pretty soon I’ll be doing fries, then the grill.

              In another year, I make assistant manager–and that’s when the BIG bucks start rolling in.”

              1. db   12 years ago

                “There’s room to move as a fry cook. In two years I could be Manager! King! God!”

  4. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    More than a decade of federal oversight of the LAPD ended this week by a decree from a judge…

    Their handling of the Dorner case showed everyone their professionalism has been restored.

  5. sarcasmic   12 years ago

    Woman bit her live-in boyfriend’s penis when he refused to have sex with her

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..x-her.html

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      I wouldn’t want to get a blowjob from somebody who bites, either.

      1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

        What does head have to do with sex?

        1. Ted S.   12 years ago

          Do we have to have “the conversation” with you?

          1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

            Maybe he is of the Bill Clinton School of Sexual Definitions?

            1. Cyto   12 years ago

              Well, that would depend on the definition of ‘is’, wouldn’t it?

      2. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

        Bad flashback to a GF I had in High School.

        1. Restoras   12 years ago

          I once dated a girl who had perfected the judicious use of teeth during fellatio.

          Dammit. Umm…excuse me, I’ll be back in a few minutes….

    2. db   12 years ago

      He did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms. Bitey.

    3. Brett L   12 years ago

      Its a wonder Brits come to FL at all. They must think they’re going on a debauchery safari when they show up here.

  6. Mike M.   12 years ago

    Former IRS chief Steve Miller, whose resignation was planned before the agency’s political targeting practices came to light but announced afterward as a sign the administration took the scandal seriously, will testify before the House Ways & Means Committee later today.

    Guess he took the money and ran.

    1. $park?   12 years ago

      Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! You beat me to it, dammit.

    2. Ptah-Hotep   12 years ago

      This joker needs to be put on a jet airliner somewhere else. He should not be living in the USA if he is going to act like that.

      1. Capt Ace Rimmer   12 years ago

        This space cowboy should be blasted out of orbit.

    3. Brett L   12 years ago

      “I’m not changing my name because some No Talent Ass Clown has the same name as I do.”

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        +1 PC Load Letter

        1. fish_remote   12 years ago

          Yeah….I’m going to need you to come in on Saturday to post these comments.

          1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

            Can’t – I’ve got 37 pieces of flair to organise

            1. Art Vandelay   12 years ago

              [mumbles]

              I’m going to set this thread on fire….

      2. KDN   12 years ago

        “Why should I change? He’s the one that sucks!”

  7. Bee Tagger   12 years ago

    The U.S. military may put boots on the ground in Libya while trying to capture or kill the alleged Benghazi attackers.

    Shouting out their YouTube usernames to see who turns around.

    1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

      +1 cordon and search

  8. sarcasmic   12 years ago

    ‘Do we have moose insurance?’ Shocked group film wild animal swimming in the pool of their holiday villa

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..villa.html

  9. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Weepy, Grouchy, Depressed: Irritable Male Syndrome Is Just Like PMS
    http://www.ivillage.com/male-v…..4-a-536031

    The scientist who coined this marvelous term, Dr. Gerard Lincoln, initially observed this change in male sheep. Come wintertime, when testosterone levels fell, the animals’ mood tanked along with it. They became irritable, depressed, disinterested in sex and easily annoyed. Like humans experiencing sidewalk rage, male rams would get all up in arms (or hooves, if you prefer) if another animal dared walk too slowly in front of him. Brawls ensued. Injuries occurred. The pastoral fields were filled with strife. Lincoln soon realized this irrational lashing out and general churlishness was not limited to sheep. Other male species went through this during the mating off-season. (Maybe guys just need to get laid more!)

    1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

      Shriek explained!

  10. Virginian   12 years ago

    http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..king-bear/

    Bear attacks man, woman hits bear with gun.

    Learn to load woman. Learn to load.

    1. Brett L   12 years ago

      OTOH, now you see how dangerous guns really are! Even without ammunition they can be used to drive off bears! Of course, she could have used a broom at that point. At least she’d have known how to work a broom.

      1. Warty   12 years ago

        I dunno. I would feel pretty safe against a black bear with one of my Mosin clubs.

        1. Virginian   12 years ago

          If you miss with a Mosin, the fireball should singe its fur.

          Of course, you could always bayonet it from the living room.

        2. T   12 years ago

          Someday, I’ll have to pick up a Moisin just for the lulz.

          1. Virginian   12 years ago

            You used to be able to get them for less than a hundred bucks.

        3. Brett L   12 years ago

          You should feel safe against anything except a loaded Mosin club.

  11. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    President Obama pledged to end the “scourge” of sexual assault in the military while acknowledging there was no “silver bullet.”

    He’s banning Coors Light from Officers Clubs.

    1. PowerBottom   12 years ago

      When I was in the Corps, ‘silver bullet’ had a much different meaning.

      1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

        Penicillin shot for the stop at Subic Bay?

        1. Ice Nine   12 years ago

          I doubt that any of these pups know anything about the place. Besides, Penicillin was no silver bullet for Pubic Bay clap.

          1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

            True, penicillin would just bounce off that.

        2. PowerBottom   12 years ago

          No, it was the rectal thermometer you’d get if you had heat exhaustion.

          1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

            +1 IV bag

  12. some guy   12 years ago

    You Friday Reason Challenge:

    Get through this Alec MacGillis tripe without drowning in someone’s tears.

    I can taste the cognitive dissonance… on my tongue.

    1. bostonaod   12 years ago

      Fuck the polite term, this is straight-up doublethink

      As Bloomberg View’s Josh Barro and others have pointed out, it was ridiculous in the first place that employees of the Internal Revenue Service, whose job is to, you know, collect revenue, were engaged in the practice of doing something completely different: determining whether politically-minded groups were engaging in election-related activities with more or less than 50 percent of their time and money.

      Okay..

      But does this suggest, as the new Beltway narrative holds, that all government and bureaucracy is doomed to such sorry ends? That, for instance, it’s insane to entrust this same agency with the task of helping manage the new health care law?

      No. And it takes some serious chutzpah to argue otherwise.

      Wait, what?

      I should add here: If the IRS finds itself hopelessly incapable of handling its part of implementing Obamacare?which it just might, not least because it says it is woefully short of resources to the task?that is another matter. Then we can have a serious discussion about the limits of technocratic liberalism.

      *head explodes*

  13. sarcasmic   12 years ago

    That will stop them in their tracks! Virtual barrier made from curtain of water halts lorries from driving through too small tunnels

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..nnels.html

    1. Virginian   12 years ago

      That’s pretty cool actually.

      1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

        I thought so.

      2. Agammamon   12 years ago

        It’d be even cooler if, instead of a stop sign, they ran a moving image of an oncoming truck.

    2. JW   12 years ago

      Not handing the truck keys to drooling morons would help as well.

      1. Brett L   12 years ago

        Its Oz, mate. Their other choice is homicidal leather fetishists.

  14. db   12 years ago

    Venezuela is facing a toilet paper shortage. The government blames the opposition. Sound familiar?

    Good thing the Federal Reserve is working hard to ensure adequate supply of toilet paper.

    1. Live Free or Diet   12 years ago

      Maybe something lost in translation? Are they calling them a bunch of asswipes?

      1. db   12 years ago

        “No no no. ‘As-we-pay.'”

        1. T   12 years ago

          The high point of Nic Cage’s career.

  15. RBS   12 years ago

    He will be studying the intersection of literacy, football, race and the economy in the South

    1. deified   12 years ago

      You know what?

      He gave school choice a fair shake in SC.

      Leave Bailey Aloooooooone.

      1. RBS   12 years ago

        Maybe, I still think he sucks.

    2. Rasilio   12 years ago

      I don’t know with all those roads coming together at one point maybe they should build a Roundabout

      1. Brett L   12 years ago

        “Round-a-boot”

  16. Bee Tagger   12 years ago

    President Obama pledged to end the “scourge” of sexual assault in the military while acknowledging there was no “silver bullet.”

    The President is doing promos for the new season of Teen Wolf?

  17. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    No, the Justice Department Did Not Wiretap the House Cloakroom
    http://www.theatlanticwire.com…..oom/65287/

    What Rep. Nunes meant by “tapped” was that the DOJ seized the phone records, as has been widely reported. There was a little confusion between him and the host during the conversation: He did not mean to refer to phone records of the cloakroom itself, but of the Capitol. This refers to the phone records for the AP from the House press gallery, which the DOJ admitted to looking at. He was explaining that if those phone records were seized, they would reveal a lot of conversations between the press and members of Congress, since reporters often speak to Members from the press gallery phones. The notion of the DOJ looking at phone records from the Capitol of conversations between Members of Congress and reporters is something that concerns Rep. Nunes, bringing up issues related to the separation of powers.

    1. Suthenboy   12 years ago

      Uhhhhhh…so there is a chance the administration wasnt spying on the press as they say, but on congress? Holy Shit.

  18. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    CIA director John Brennan made an unannounced trip to Israel…

    And oy was it a schlep.

    1. Drax the Destroyer   12 years ago

      Brennan is short for Brennangoldbergsilversteinblatt.

    2. NeonCat   12 years ago

      The food was terrible, and the portions so small.

  19. robc   12 years ago

    I dont wish to continue the “fracas” from yesterday’s links, but I have a related link that is useful/fun:

    http://www.seekabrew.com/distro/index.html

    You can look up distribution for a brewery, or look up a state and see what is distributed there.

    Or compare two states, like, hypothetically, MD and KY, and see that MD has far more breweries distributing to it.

    The site is far from perfect, from playing with it for 5 minutes this morning, I found a number of inaccuracies (or more accurately, things not included). Read the about, its basically run off a single spreadsheet that a guy updates every few weeks (5/15 was last update) based on changes people send him.

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      I am going to check this out. Very difficult to find my favorites – it’s like I’m living in a beer desert.

      1. robc   12 years ago

        There is some fun stuff to do with it too. Like compare New Glarus to Great Lakes, they are approximately the same size, NG is slightly larger.

        Distribution areas are radically different though, arent they?

        Or check out Bell’s, whats the outlier? Does Larry Bell have a winter home in Phoenix or something?

        Or compare Bells to Founders. It explains why so many people are confused when they hear that Founders is MUCH smaller than Bells.

        1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

          STOP REMINDING ME THAT NEW GLARUS DOESN’T DISTRIBUTE IN IL!

          1. robc   12 years ago

            You know they used to, right?

            1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

              YES, THAT IS WHY IT HURTS!

        2. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

          They have Dry Dock. Quite possibly my favorite beer not made by monks.

          And to brag a bit YES, I did buy both the Westvlet 8 and 12 last month…several crates worth.

    2. kinnath   12 years ago

      So robc, I will be kegging my first batch of beer next week. What are your opinions on priming versus forced-carbonation in kegs?

      1. robc   12 years ago

        I force carb.

        CO2 is CO2.

        1. db   12 years ago

          +44.01

        2. kinnath   12 years ago

          Thanks

        3. Old Man With Candy   12 years ago

          Charmat vs Methode Champagnoise? Nope, not the same.

          1. robc   12 years ago

            A secondary fermentation may make a difference, but it isnt due to the CO2. CO2 is CO2.

            Its fucking chemistry.

            1. Old Man With Candy   12 years ago

              Yes, but how you get the CO2 in there DOES make a difference. Not just in side reactions, but in how it dissolves/nucleates. It’s not just a molecule, it’s a heterogeneous interface between bulk materials.

              1. robc   12 years ago

                It is just a molecule at a certain point. Its a gas dissolved in a liquid. Give it time to settle to equilibrium and you cant distinguish between methods of dissolving it.

                It aint a metal, that annealing techniques matter.

              2. db   12 years ago

                The method of dissolution doesn’t matter. The only difference between forced carbonation and fermentation carbonation is the sugar added. The additional sugar left over, the added alcohol, and the increased concentration of yeast byproducts can change, minutely, the body, mouthfeel, and flavor of a beer. However, these effects, if desired, can be worked into the original recipe.

                Dissolved gas is dissolved gas, otherwise chemical engineering as we know it would not exist.

                1. Old Man With Candy   12 years ago

                  Then why does a Charmat sparkler have a different bubble structure than a MC sparkler? Sure, the CO2 molecule is exactly the same, but the solvation and (eventual) nucleation are different. Not because CO2 isn’t CO2, but because the way the CO2 is solvated (think free volumes) is different.

                  1. db   12 years ago

                    The first part of my post answers your question. It is the differences in liquid viscosity and density that govern surface tension and hence bubble size. These are physical, not chemical, properties.

          2. robc   12 years ago

            Also, I need to point out that beer doesnt (or very rarely) use methode champagnoise, as the yeast doesnt settle into the neck to be dispelled, but settles on the bottom of the bottle, where it can be poured off or swirled back in, as taste prefers.

            1. Old Man With Candy   12 years ago

              True, but that contrasts with putting CO2 in via a pressurized bulk vessel.

              Shit, you’re gettin’ me thirsty.

      2. db   12 years ago

        If you want to force carb (which I recommend) it helps greatly to chill your fermenter before kegging (if you have temp control). Chill the beer first and it takes almost no time to carb up. I also highly recommend one of these.

        1. edcoast   12 years ago

          I read that as “chill your member.” As someone above said “oy.”

    3. bostonaod   12 years ago

      Looks like MA has the high score

      1. robc   12 years ago

        That may be a result of a lot of MA residents on beeradvocate, where the spreadsheet originated, and thus its the most complete.

        But also, yes, them or CA.

  20. Ted S.   12 years ago

    Members of Congress Send Google Letter Asking for Answers Regarding Privacy Concerns

    If I were Google, I’d respond telling that I share their concern over the privacy concerns of people who had their medical records taken by the IRS.

  21. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Budgets have been cut to the bone! TO THE BONE!

    Lisa Jackson’s Official (EPA) Portrait: I’m Guessing That’s a Watercolor?
    http://www.nationalreview.com/…..m-geraghty

    Let your comments meander, flow and rage like? like? well, I’m sure some metaphor will come to you.

    Some are complaining that the $40,000 fee for the portrait is too much, but I would contend that this is the only official government portrait that has come even close to providing $40,000 in entertainment value.

    1. Virginian   12 years ago

      Why the hell are they taking official government portraits anyway?

      1. WTF   12 years ago

        Good question. We have cameras now. Yet they spend $40,000 for a crappy painting of government functionaries.
        Not one thing left to cut from the budget.

        1. Virginian   12 years ago

          I mean, I could live off that quite well for a year.

          Hell, that’s only like four thousand less than the median household income of the US.

          1. RBS   12 years ago

            Yeah, my wife and I live pretty well off of around $22,000 right now. $40,000 sounds pretty sweet.

        2. T   12 years ago

          I took a panoramic shot of a stadium from our seats before they tore down the satdium. I got it made into a 12 x 36 on canvas for 2 orders of magnitude less than this painting cost. I could have had them make it look like a watercolor if I gave a damn. $40K is retarded.

          1. Virginian   12 years ago

            All those art majors have to make a living somehow.

    2. Warty   12 years ago

      What has she been doing to her poor vag to make it steam like that?

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        Steam? That’s Queef River, a lesser know tributary of the River Styx.

      2. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

        Possibly a douche gone wrong?

      3. Hollywood   12 years ago

        I lol’d.

      4. PRX   12 years ago

        snatch gas. I’ve heard of it, but never actually seen it before.

    3. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

      That stream is flowing right into her hoo-ha.

      1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

        no, that’s ectoplasm escaping from her hoo-ha. It’s haunted, don’t you know.

        Why the fuck does she merit an official painted portrait? Whip out the iPhone, shove her up against a wall and take a photo mugshot-style should produce a perfectly acceptable official portrait

        1. SugarFree   12 years ago

          The Haunted Vagina

          Steve is madly in love with his eccentric girlfriend, Stacy. Unfortunately, their sex life has been suffering as of late, because Steve is worried about the odd noises that have been coming from Stacy’s pubic region. She says that her vagina is haunted. She doesn’t think it’s that big of a deal. Steve, on the other hand, completely disagrees.

          When a living corpse climbs out of her during an awkward night of sex, Stacy learns that her vagina is actually a doorway to another world. She persuades Steve to climb inside of her to explore this strange new place. But once inside, Steve finds it difficult to return… especially once he meets an oddly attractive woman named Fig, who lives within the lonely haunted world between Stacy’s legs.

          1. T   12 years ago

            So, we know now SugarFree’s pen name…

          2. $park?   12 years ago

            W. T. F!

          3. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

            yikes!

          4. edcoast   12 years ago

            Flashlight hell, find my keys and we’ll DRIVE out of here.

    4. db   12 years ago

      “SPLOOSH!” ?

    5. RightNut   12 years ago

      Why is their a stream coming out of her vagina?

  22. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

    Venezuela is facing a toilet paper shortage. The government blames the opposition. Sound familiar?

    Yes. Because it was in AM Links yesterday. And not even a hat tip for whoever posted it

    1. Warty   12 years ago

      Anyone else hear something?

      1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

        Just trying to keep the bastards honest

        found it. Rich is the robbed party

        1. RBS   12 years ago

          They always have some excuse like “I already read it before you sent it” or “some other, much cooler guy guy sent it in first.”

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Somebody also reposted it to the afternoon links. I presume you must have posted the AM links version, and are pissed about not getting a hat-tip? 🙂

      1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

        not on my behalf

  23. Caleb Turberville   12 years ago

    http://www.colbertnation.com/#tool_tip_2

    Stephen Colbert had a segment on 3D gun printing last night. It has the expected bootlicking of federal anti-gun efforts, but he does acknowledge the futility of trying to ban a file that’s already been posted to the internet.

  24. Mike M.   12 years ago

    Rules, schmoolz, hold my umbrella, biyatch.

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      The Marines have an umbrella protocol?

      1. Brett L   12 years ago

        God Bless ’em, the Marines have a protocol for pretty much everything. When you have to teach every idiot who passes the AFSVAB how to do the most basic things like iron a shirt, wear a belt, etc. you just decide that you’re gonna make a policy for everything and everyone follows the policy.

      2. T   12 years ago

        The Army has the same protocol. Male personnel in uniform do not carry umbrellas. We gave you a raincoat, so suck it up.

        I dunno what the rules are for the womenfolk.

        1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

          Coast Guard guys get lame things to put over their good-humor guys hats. I saw a bunch of them in Lansing recently during a sleet-hail storm. Not like the hat guard will stop that.

    2. db   12 years ago

      I like the part of the rule prohibits any officer from issuing an order contrary to the dress code without approval of the Marine Commandant. I wonder if Obama got a waiver?

      1. Agammamon   12 years ago

        I’m pretty sure that not even the Marines can create regulation that is binding on their civilian superiors.

        I.e., The CMC doesn’t get to tell the president what he can or can’t do with his Marines, its the other way around.

        1. db   12 years ago

          You’re probably right about that, but what are the limits of the President issuing direct orders to service members? Does he have complete ability to ignore the chain of command? Can he issue an illegal order and expect it to be followed? Would this rise to the level of an illegal order? Probably not.

          1. Agammamon   12 years ago

            Any senior can give a lawful order to any junior (regardless of branch of service) – as an example, I (a navy E-6) can give orders to Marine/AF/Army juniors and expect them to be obeyed (well the reality is a bit more complicated than that). Unfortunately it cuts both ways – *I* would be expected to obey orders from the USPHS officers.

            If he wanted to, Obama could have the CMC hold that umbrella.

    3. some guy   12 years ago

      Obama displayed an ignorance of an official government policy? This is dog bites man, therefore not news.

    4. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

      It seems kinda weird to suggest something that happens over the course of their duties qualifies as a uniform violation. I’m sure there’s regulations against wearing uniforms with visible stains too. Does that mean that when a marine gets shot in combat, do they get penalized for bleeding all over their uniforms?

      1. The Dan   12 years ago

        yes, Marines are not allowed to get shot

  25. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

    Venezuela is facing a toilet paper shortage.

    Central planning doesn’t have a square to spare.

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      I wonder what the black market price for a square is.

      1. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

        Might as well just use the money instead, paper or coin.

        1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

          So it’s poop everywhere! Again.

  26. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

    I bet he is

    Australian Politician Sorry for Liking Picture of Teen’s ‘Sneaky Nuts’

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      “Sneaky nuts”? I’m almost afraid to click no the link.

      1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

        C’mon, do it!

        (Then tell what lurks there)

        1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

          Oh it’s safe for work, you weasels!

          1. Rasilio   12 years ago

            Yeah but the pic the pol liked wasn’t

          2. Agammamon   12 years ago

            Its Australian – nothing is safe there. Even your teddy bears kill.

            1. Mercutio   12 years ago

              “On Vulcan, the ‘teddy bears’ are alive, and they have six-inch fangs.”

    2. Brett L   12 years ago

      Every time I think the Aussies are weird, you ask me to believe something beyond parody.

      1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

        You would be passing strange too if you had to dodge drop bears, snakes, spiders the size of dinner plates, 6′ wing-spanned Kookaburras, angry crocs and feral camels – and all that just on the way to the corner tavern.

    3. RightNut   12 years ago

      In the picture, the boy was partaking in the time-honored Australian tradition of “sneaky nuts,” whereby he was furtively exposing his genitals.

      Wow Australia has some weird traditions.

      1. Redmanfms   12 years ago

        Australia is the totally unsurprising result of taking the absolute worst criminal degenerate scum of Dickensian Britain and allowing them to propagate for 150 years.

      2. BiMonSciFiCon   12 years ago

        Disparaging weird traditions is a bootable offense.

  27. deified   12 years ago

    Awesome Free State Project documentary is Awesome: http://youtu.be/b_34jAsXe1k (20 min)

    Cannabis helps fight Crohn’s too: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23648372

    1. PowerBottom   12 years ago

      Crohn’s? That’s awesome, I was diagnosed in 2009, and every medicine they had me try had such awful side effects I just said fuck it and have dealt with the pain.

      1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

        Get thee to CO or WA!

        1. PowerBottom   12 years ago

          Might not be a bad idea, but I live in KY which has some of the stickiest of icky, the stinkiest of stank, the…well, you get it. No problem finding kush in KY.

          1. Restoras   12 years ago

            Isn’t KY a leading grower and exporter of quality bud?

            1. PowerBottom   12 years ago

              Oh yes. Not sure if it still is, but at one point it was our biggest cash crop.

              1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

                They already have sophisticated smuggling networks too. The black-market cigarette traffic into IL alone is higher than the opium smuggled up the Tagab Valley in Kapisa, AF (well, at least when I was there).

                1. Restoras   12 years ago

                  Midway Island has an extensive opium smuggling network? Jeez, the things you learn here!

                  1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

                    Climb Mount Niitaka

      2. deified   12 years ago

        In addition to the scientific study, the anecdotal evidence is seriously massive.

      3. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

        I’ve been colon-free since ’05 (UC).

        1. Brett L   12 years ago

          My best friend from high school had UC and has been without a colon since ’98. He went through hell trying to get the pipe reattached to the outlet. Seriously, five or six years of surgeries and some terribly fucked up pain management along the way. (After cutting him open wide enough to get two hands in his abdominal cavity to attach his small intestine to his anus, a Cleveland hospital cut him off all narcotic pain medicine less than 12 hours later.)

          1. WTF   12 years ago

            After cutting him open wide enough to get two hands in his abdominal cavity to attach his small intestine to his anus, a Cleveland hospital cut him off all narcotic pain medicine less than 12 hours later.

            Thank you, DEA.

          2. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

            It only took me 3 months to get reattached. The second surgery only involved one couple of inch incision. Nowadays they can sometimes do the entire thing in 1 surgery.

            After cutting him open wide enough to get two hands in his abdominal cavity to attach his small intestine to his anus, a Cleveland hospital cut him off all narcotic pain medicine less than 12 hours later.

            That’s odd, because I went through a similar thing. My first surgery involved cutting my abs literally in two so they could remove about 10 lbs worth of intestines. When the nurse came by to switch my morphine drip about 2 hours after the surgery ended she kinked the tube somehow. I started complaining a couple of minutes later, but since I was 16 and in the adults’ ward, the nurse thought I was just being a whiny kid.

            Eventually she got fed up and told me I needed to calm down. The surgeon came by something like an hour after she switched the IV and when my parents explained how much I’d been complaining he realized something was wrong, and then saw that I hadn’t gotten any of the morphine from the new bag. My mom started yelling at the nurse until the surgeon kicked her (the nurse) off the ward until I was discharged a couple of days later.

            1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

              I couldn’t imagine being cut off completely the same day.

        2. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

          So what happens if you’re a bottom and you need to get your colon removed?

          1. Coeus   12 years ago

            You learn to suck a mean dick.

            1. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

              … Well that’s no fun. How is that gonna get me off?

      4. itsnotmeitsyou   12 years ago

        Canabis works great on Crohn’s.

        I have a good friend who’s had it for years, he carries around a bag full of pills that he has to take at specific intervals (probably not telling you anything new). Except when he gets home. He smokes a joint and doesn’t have to take most of them after that.

        1. Mercutio   12 years ago

          I think a lot of the opposition to pain medication is nothing more than old fashioned Puritanism. You know, “the more you suffer in this world, the better off you’ll be in the next.”

    2. Also Ran   12 years ago

      Awesome Free State Project documentary is Awesome

      I watched it last night, definitely brought a smile to my face. The segment towards the end about the marijuana rallies in Keene is pretty awesome.
      There’s a good feature-length documentary out there called Libertopia, all about the FSP. I’ve been dancing around the issue of whether or not to sign my letter of intent. I think once I sell my house here in KC I’ll do it.

      1. deified   12 years ago

        Did you actually see Libertopia?

        Is it actually good or just a sympathetic subject? Don’t lie to me now. 🙂

        1. Also Ran   12 years ago

          I bought the DVD when it came out. It’s worth watching, if you are interested in the FSP.

          It follows the story of about 3 or 4 different people from different backgrounds who decided to move to NH as part of the FSP. I haven’t watched it in a while, but I think it mostly focuses on their motivations for making the move, and their journey/arrival. One of the segments is on a NH native who is part of the FSP, I believe he is an medical marijuana activist, so it does discuss the types of activism going on there.

        2. Also Ran   12 years ago

          Not sure if you are/were a Ron Paul guy, but there is another great feature-length documentary called For Liberty that focuses on the 2008 Paul campaign, and all the grassroots activism that went on. I believe the FSP gets some significant face time in it as well. That one is on Netflix, if I’m not mistaken.

  28. PowerBottom   12 years ago

    The IRS was right to target Tea Party

    ‘In castigating government as the root of all evil while portraying taxation as a form of tyranny, the Tea Party is no less than a mass celebration of the evasion of the basic responsibilities of American citizenship. Common sense alone tells you that people drawn to its ranks may feel extra temptation to find ways to limit what they surrender to the rogue federal bureaucrats who have supposedly seized the nation.’

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/…..80063.html

    1. Virginian   12 years ago

      All together now….Fuck off slaver

      1. PowerBottom   12 years ago

        The comments are full retard. It’s HuffPo, so no surprise, but sometimes even the most pogressivey progressives can at least see why this is a dangerous trend.

        1. AuH20   12 years ago

          They had about three and a half days where it looked like they would turn on Obama, but gee gosh golly those Republicans are just playing politics with these scandals and they can’t support that!

          I’m hoping for another scandal to pop up in the Friday dump so that they shut the fuck up.

          1. Virginian   12 years ago

            They’ll never shut up. Never.

          2. Restoras   12 years ago

            I don’t think they were ever going to turn on Obama.

            1. Virginian   12 years ago

              Obama could give a speech whilst holding a small puppy on his lap, pause for a moment to kill it with his bare hands, and then finish his speech, and they’d still love him.

              It’s a fucking cult.

              1. AuH20   12 years ago

                Yeah, but it seems to be less and less about how perfect and awesome Obama is, and more on how evil and mean Republicans are. They even seem to have dropped the, “Obama can’t do anything because of these damn Republicans!” to “Look, I don’t like that he did X, but Romney was just so evil and Republican-y! And they are all like that!”

                It is no longer about their side winning as much as making sure that the Republicans don’t win.

                1. Stormy Dragon   12 years ago

                  Yeah, but it seems to be less and less about how perfect and awesome Obama is, and more on how evil and mean Republicans are.

                  So basically the people who voted for Obama are the same as the people who voted for Romney now?

              2. EDG reppin' LBC   12 years ago

                It’s a fucking cult.

                Sadly, yes.

                1. Virginian   12 years ago

                  I mean, the people who liked Bush had reasons for it, policy reasons. They all liked tax cuts, most of them liked the bombing of the Mooselimbs, and the socons loved that sweet federal funding of their causes and charities.

                  But the Obama they voted for is the exact opposite on so many issues of the Obama that actually governs. Which means they didn’t care at all about the issues. Because if they did, they wouldn’t be supporting him still.

                  It’s a cult because Obama can completely change his stance on issues, and his followers then immediately begin to speak the newly revealed truth.

                  1. Cyto   12 years ago

                    This is true, but in my experience very few people have any idea what the policies of their candidates/officials are. Most folks will claim they support Obama(or Bush or Clinton, etc.) because of their policies – but when asked what policy they support, they have a hard time.

                    When Clinton was president my friends would claim they were happy with his policies on the economy. When pressed to name some policy that he implemented in relation to the economy they uniformly failed or mentioned the balanced budget that Newt crammed down his throat.

                    With Bush it was that he was a strong conservative (guffaw!). With Obama it might be how he got us out of Iraq (!) or the economy or healthcare (at least there was some legislation on healthcare, even if Obama played little role in it’s formulation). But when pressed further for details beyond the talk radio / MSNBC bullet points, they always get befuddled.

                    Nobody supports a politician for his policies. The reasons are “team” and image. That’s about it.

                    1. paranoid android   12 years ago

                      I think this reached its nadir with the 2012 Democratic Convention. I sat in total disbelief while the Bill Clinton proclaimed that Barack Obama needed to be reelected in order to revive the prosperity of the Clinton years, and the audience lapped it up, with no mention of the fact that Clinton’s signature economic policies (NAFTA, welfare reform, repeal of Glass-Stegal) are the very things liberals have been calling evil and ruinous ever since they were enacted, and that Obama’s own economic policies bear no resemblance whatsoever to Clinton’s.

                      All I could think was, “Wow, if he went up there and told these people that two plus two is five, they’d believe him.”

                2. BigT   12 years ago

                  I believe it is a purging of America’s original sin – racism. By supporting the black Jeebus these folks are forever cleansed of the taint of our eeevil founding. After all, what issue has dominated the political horizon for the past 50 years more than race relations? They will do anything to absolve themselves of this fundamental flaw.

                  Yes, it’s a cult, with strong parallels to many other cults.

              3. DontShootMe   12 years ago

                But if he then grilled it and ate it, would they still love him?

    2. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

      If they didn’t want hassled then they should have fallen into line.

    3. Warty   12 years ago

      1809 Fans
      2 hours ago ( 7:33 AM)
      TheTea Party has not the slightest idea of what benefits they get from tax dollars. Highways they have never seen. airports they have never seen, public schools and emergency wards and police and courts and prisons (prisons are a massive cst to the tax payer) and other silly things such as governments and sewers etc. The Tea Party should read a little about life before the twentieth century. Or life during the Great Depression. Or life in Bangladesh. If and when the Tea Party becomes focussed on the elements of Christianity they will welcome taxes which bnefit all and oppose corporations which want their money and will get their money one way or another.

      There’s no government in Bangladesh?

      1. Night Elf Mohawk   12 years ago

        Because those are the things most people complain about when it comes to government spending. That’s so disingenuous shit even from a disingenuous shit.

        1. generic Brand   12 years ago

          Well I complain about public schools quite a bit.

          1. Night Elf Mohawk   12 years ago

            And if you could take that list of government spending, public schools included, and call it a day, as opposed to what we have now…

      2. Virginian   12 years ago

        Life during the Great Depression was miserable due to the overpowering and meddling federal government.

      3. Zeb   12 years ago

        And Tea Partiers are anarchists? I’d bet that most tea party folk are all for public roads, police, courts, prisons and sewers, at least.

      4. Virginian   12 years ago

        There are no private schools, airports, or hospitals.

        Plus now we have liberals bragging about the awesome American prison system? WTF?

        1. some guy   12 years ago

          They are in charge now.

        2. fish_remote   12 years ago

          Plus now we have liberals bragging about the awesome American prison system? WTF?

          What….you haven’t been seeing examples of “mask slipping” every day since Sugar Coated Barry O’s took office?

        3. AuH20   12 years ago

          I mean… Stop and Frisk is to me the most egregious, “The police state is fine, as long as it is recreates Tom Wolfe’s Bonfire of the Vanities as closely as possible.”

      5. Agammamon   12 years ago

        The *government* created my sewer? And all this time I thought it was the water company. I mean, they’re the ones I pay the sewer bill to.

      6. RightNut   12 years ago

        TheTea Party has not the slightest idea of what benefits they get from tax dollars. Highways they have never seen. airports they have never seen, public schools….

        If I’ve never seen nor heard or used those highways, airports, and schools, why the fuck should I have to pay for them?

        Funny how liberals miss the obvious.

        1. Virginian   12 years ago

          Well with highways and airports the argument goes that, unless you are completely self sufficient homesteaders, which is incredibly difficult, then you are getting benefits from transportation infrastructure.

          Of course, if all the government did was the interstate highway system and the airports, none of us would have a problem with it.

          1. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

            It’s just a slightly altered version of the SOMALIA! argument.

            The stupid thing about their stance is that Somalia HAS a government. It’s venal, corrupt, and thoroughly tribal, but it’s a government nonetheless.

            In all honesty, the only difference between Somalia’s government and ours is one of scale. There’s certainly no difference in their fundamental natures.

            It’s also easier for progs to continually torch the “libertarians = anarchists” strawman than actually confront the corruption of the government institutions they support or engage the issues of scale brought about by continually expanding the reach of those corrupt institutions.

          2. RightNut   12 years ago

            I would have less of a problem with the government is that was all they did, and even less if it was my state government instead of the fed, and the least if it was my local government. The problem with justifying taxes based off benefits is that nearly any government spending can be shown to benefit someone even if its so removed from them they would never, ever notice.

            IE, Taxes get spent on Solyndra, Solyndra makes solar panels, solar panels create electricity, I use electricity, therefore my taxes benefit me.

            Apart from the logical fallacy, that argument completely ignores the cost of the taxes compared to the benefit.

            1. Virginian   12 years ago

              Costs are racist.

              It’s always annoying when liberals fall back on “The people who depend on these programs!!!”

              No shit, the people who get free money want the free money to keep coming. I get that.

    4. generic Brand   12 years ago

      mass celebration of the evasion of the basic responsibilities of American citizenship

      Oh there it is… I’m not sure how I missed it. “A person is a United States citizen when they are born within the borders or at least one of their parents are a U.S. citizen, and they pay their taxes.”

      Fuck off, slavers.

    5. Zeb   12 years ago

      So, I guess if you are not in favor of every tax ever, you are a bad citizen? The TP is hardly a radically anti-government movement. But these people seem to think that if you don’t love everything government does, you don’t want government to do anything at all.

      1. PowerBottom   12 years ago

        I don’t know how it got to be cool to like the government, especially among young people.

        1. Zeb   12 years ago

          That’s a good question. When did that happen? It seems like naive, youthful leftism used to be a whole lot more anti-authoritarian.

        2. Virginian   12 years ago

          Public schools. It all starts and ends there. They get 30 hours of statist indoctrination a week for most of the year. You think they’re going to come out as skeptics of government?

          1. Zeb   12 years ago

            Are they really getting that much worse? Public schools are not exactly a new thing.

            1. Virginian   12 years ago

              Dude, you have no idea. It’s a constant drumbeat, it starts in kindergarten and goes through high school.

              History alone is incredibly distorted. The 20s were false prosperity, FDR saved the nation, etc.

              Global warming and environmental religion masquerading as science classes.

              In a more general sense, the school system is not designed to create inquisitive, skeptical, independent thinkers. It produces a crude mimicry of such when said traits are aligned in the service of left statism. But it does generate that truly critical mind which is necessary for a republic to function as a free society.

              Oh, and the constant denigration of profit and the free market is one of the major drivers of the current unpleasantness, in my opinion. There are plenty of smart young people, but they spend their formative years being told that businessmen are greedy and mean and possibly bigoted.

              1. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

                History alone is incredibly distorted. The 20s were false prosperity, FDR saved the nation, etc.

                I’ve lost count of how many supposedly educated libs tell me that Hoover was a laissez-faire President. When I point out that spending increased every year during his tenure and all the interventionist policies he enacted, they typically turn to, “Yes, but he didn’t do ENOUGH” argument.

                Then I point out that FDR spent about $150 billion, inflation-adjusted, at the height of the Great Depression and they have no answer any more.

        3. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

          They only support the gov’t when the ones they like are in charge maybe?

        4. BiMonSciFiCon   12 years ago

          Obama

      2. Ted S.   12 years ago

        As usual, the good Fr?d?ric Bastiat had something to say about that.

    6. lap83   12 years ago

      Classic projection.

      What progs don’t understand is the idea of a personal code of morals and ethics. Conservatives pay their taxes because they know they should, but they don’t think they should have to pay so much so they protest it. If they had no qualms against not paying them to get what they wanted, they would simply cheat and shut up to avoid scrutiny.

      1. Virginian   12 years ago

        No, conservatives pay taxes because if they don’t, they’ll go to jail.

        If you had a year where the IRS gave amnesty to all tax evaders, then we’d see just how many people think taxes are really necessary.

  29. Hollywood   12 years ago

    NYT: Nope, Still No Cover-Up

    Absence of evidence does not equal evidence of absence.

    Perhaps the most iffy email in the batch was from Victoria Nuland, the State Department spokesman. She said that lawmakers could “abuse” the initial talking points to “beat the State Department for not paying attention to agency warnings.” But given Congressional Republicans behavior over the last 4 ? years, Ms. Nuland’s fear of “abuse” seems, frankly, warranted.

    1. OldMexican   12 years ago

      But given Congressional Republicans behavior over the last 4 ? years, Ms. Nuland’s fear of “abuse” seems, frankly, warranted.

      And hence the cover-up, so not to give those weasels any fodder from whence to feed. But the blogger is assuring us that there is no cover-up, at the same time justifying a cover-up!

  30. Bee Tagger   12 years ago

    Former IRS chief Steve Miller … will testify before the House Ways & Means Committee later today.

    Since Obama had him resign, he should feel totally safe from any revenge audits should he not present the administration in the best possible light, right?

  31. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

    Samantha “Don’t Hate Me Cos I Haz Beauty” Brick confirms our suspicion that she’s as thick as, well, a brick

    1. Restoras   12 years ago

      Was she sitting on a park bench at the time?

      1. generic Brand   12 years ago

        And how greasy are her fingers or shabby are her clothes?

      2. $park?   12 years ago

        Eyeing idle girls with bad intent?

        1. generic Brand   12 years ago

          “Idle”? Hmmm, I always thought it was “little” because Aqualung was just that perverted. It’s nice to know that the homeless men of lore were not also pedophiles.

          1. $park?   12 years ago

            I thought the same thing. I was surprised when I looked up the lyrics.

            1. WTF   12 years ago

              Well, that’s another lyric I’ve been destroying for decades.

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      “Our” suspicion? I’ve never heard of Samantha Brick before.

      1. db   12 years ago

        +mortar

        1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

          INCOMING!

          Oh, not that kind of “mortar”.

          Whew.

      2. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

        you just don’t read AM Links carefully enough and commit them to memory

        1. Ted S.   12 years ago

          Ahem. I’m the one who gets lambasted for pointing out stuff has already been posted. So in general I do remember what goes on in the AM Links.

          I will admit that I don’t pay too much attention to the “ladies either John or Sarcasmic would fap to” section of the comments, though.

          1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

            you really can’t be teased, can you?

            1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

              no humor…too many scandals for humor

  32. Suthenboy   12 years ago

    “Venezuela is facing a toilet paper shortage. The government blames the opposition. Sound familiar?”

    Russian joke from USSR days;

    If all of North Africa instituted socialism, within a year they would have a shortage of sand.

  33. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Ewwww — poop in pools more common than you may think, CDC warns
    http://www.latimes.com/news/sc…..9312.story

    Over the winter, researchers used genetic tests to identify several types of pathogens in the filter samples. Among the 161 samples, 93 — or 58% — contained Escherichia coli, a bacterium that lives in the digestive tract of humans and other warm-blooded animals. The researchers treated the presence of E. coli as “a fecal indicator,” they wrote in their report.

    How did it get into the pools? In all likelihood, swimmers delivered some of it into the water by failing to take a thorough, soapy shower before getting into the pool. “Each person has an average of 0.14 grams of fecal material on their perianal surface that could rinse into the water,” the report notes.

    1. PowerBottom   12 years ago

      “Each person has an average of 0.14 grams of fecal material on their perianal surface that could rinse into the water,” the report notes.

      Who’s the sonofabitch that found this out?

      1. Clich? Bandit   12 years ago

        worst. internship. ever.

      2. NeonCat   12 years ago

        “Excuse me, I’d like to examine your perianal surface. For science.”

    2. AuH20   12 years ago

      I’ve found that if you think about bacteria or fecal matter or what not, there is simply no way you’ll go through life happy. Look, it’s not killing you or making you sick, hell, it’s probably strengthening your immune system.

      Just don’t think about it.

      1. Zeb   12 years ago

        That’s my approach. Everything has some amount of feces in it. Any lake or pond you might swim in has fecal E. Coli and lots of other bacteria in it. Just don’t drink a lot of the water and you’re all good.

        1. some guy   12 years ago

          To be safe, all liquids consumed should have at least 5% alcohol content.

      2. RightNut   12 years ago

        Didn’t mythbusters do this awhile back? They left toothbrushes in a bathroom and another in a different room which was not a bathroom. I recall after they got the tests back both toothbrushes tested positive for fecal bacteria. The conclusion was their is poo everywhere.

    3. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

      I’m no expert with pools, but isn’t this the point of using chlorine?

      1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

        Aye.

    4. db   12 years ago

      I’m sure it has nothing whatever to do with people dunking their diaper-wearing babies in the pool either.

      1. T   12 years ago

        I will probably be doing that this summer. Mainly because the owner of said pool gave us the pool diapers and a bathing suit and more or less told us the kid was going swimming this summer. I figure it’s his pool, so if he’s fine with it, I’m fine with it.

    5. np   12 years ago

      It’s because of those people that leave skid marks.

      (Japanese toilets would probably help)

    6. some guy   12 years ago

      Poop on toothbrushes is probably more common than you think, too. Doesn’t mean it will hurt you. In fact, it’s best to just not think about such things at all.

  34. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

    Australian Government sneaks in a national web filter by the back door

    1. Warty   12 years ago

      Christ. Oz seems to be enthusiastically going down the road of the mother country. Do Australians support this kind of shit, or is the government just forcing it on them?

      1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

        We’re like most people anywhere – freedom of speech for me, just not for those arseholes over there. But this Government has attempted to trash free speech in so many ways that it’s become a minor issue. It’s going to be voted out in September for a bunch of reasons anyway, and the next Government has expressly pointed to these abuses, so I am cautiously optimistic.

        1. AuH20   12 years ago

          How badly is Julia doing?

          1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

            Dead Woman Walking

          2. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

            So badly it’s heartwarming. Her party’s primary vote is around 30% and on a two-party preferred it’s 45%. If the polls stay steady, this could be the worst result for her party in 80 years, and their second-worst ever. A whole generation of future leaders could lose their seats. So, great news if you get off on political disasters, which I do

            1. generic Brand   12 years ago

              So, great news if you get off on political disasters, which I do

              Go on… (no Matthew Perry)

    2. Ted S.   12 years ago

      And yet they still let you visit H&R.

      1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

        For now.

  35. deified   12 years ago

    Rand Paul thinks President Obama should take some responsibility for once in his goddamned life.

    1. generic Brand   12 years ago

      If he’s gone 45+ years absolving himself of all personal responsibility or accountability, why should he start now?

    2. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      How can he be responsible when there are still Republicans out there?

  36. generic Brand   12 years ago

    So if I were to start watching a series, which of the following would be recommended most highly? (in no particular order)

    Homeland
    Boss
    Spartacus (starting at season 2)

    I loved the first season of Spartacus, but with the guy playing the titular role having died, I don’t know if I want to invest the time into a different performance, if that makes any sense. I’ve heard pretty good things about the other two shows, as well.

    1. deified   12 years ago

      Homeland started a tiny bit slow but keeps getting better. (I’m still in Season 1).

    2. tarran   12 years ago

      Check out the Finder on Netflix.

      The premise is really silly, the writing declines in quality as the series goes on, but it’s very… entertaining.

    3. kinnath   12 years ago

      Homeland season 1 was brilliant, season 2 was erratic but pretty good overall.

      Boss has moments of brilliance and so thoroughly explains the Obama administration that it scares me.

      Can’t comment on Spartacus.

    4. SugarFree   12 years ago

      Homeland becomes a fantasy series in season 2. By season 3, elves will be fighting ogres from the backs of flying aurochs.

      1. kinnath   12 years ago

        Homeland would have been one perfect season, if they hadn’t chickened out in the end.

      2. Brett L   12 years ago

        Homeland annoys the shit out of me, because they could just fire her and keep him out of DC and the problem is fucking solved.

    5. EDG reppin' LBC   12 years ago

      Spartacus is good. The new guy blended seamlessly. Plus, boobies everywhere!

      1. generic Brand   12 years ago

        “I know what I like, and I like boobies!”

      2. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

        I wouldn’t say seamlessly, because it noticeably took him a couple of episodes to really settle into the character. By mid-season, though, he was doing great–the 5th episode is one of the best of the whole series because Liam wasn’t trying to live up to Andy’s portrayal anymore and just let it flow.

        Damn shame about Illythia not being in season 3, though–her character was delightfully evil, she and Spartacus had awesome chemistry, and I’m amazed they didn’t bring her back for a hate-fuck between the two of them.

      3. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

        I only saw one or two episodes, and there was a lot of hot sex. Same for season 2?

    6. Restoras   12 years ago

      Carnival was one of my favorites.

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        Carnivale…

        1. generic Brand   12 years ago

          This is a show, or a specific episode in one of the series?

          1. Restoras   12 years ago

            Sorry, it was a two-season show on HBO that is a Good vs. Evil allegory set in, I believe, the midwest during the Great Depression.

  37. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

    Five wrong ideas about our jobless crisis
    http://www.marketwatch.com/sto…..eid=yhoof2

    They say that the high unemployment rate is due to lack of skills. They say that all the new jobs are just part-time jobs any way. They say that small businesses aren’t hiring. They say that millions of people have simply given up on getting a job and have joined the 47%. And they say that this is the worst jobs recovery.

    All of these claims are misleading, and repeating them distracts us from what’s really wrong: We’re trapped in a vicious cycle in which slow job growth leads to weak income growth, which in turn means we can’t spend enough to create the demand necessary for businesses to hire more workers.

    1. AuH20   12 years ago

      Solution: STIMULUZ!!!

    2. Restoras   12 years ago

      Marketwatch is awful.

    3. $park?   12 years ago

      we can’t spend enough to create the demand necessary for businesses to hire more workers.

      …!

  38. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

    Sen. Rand Paul went on Fox News Sunday and told a pretty big lie about marijuana. He claimed, with zero evidence, that marijuana takes away your incentive to work.

    http://www.politicususa.com/ra…..-work.html

    1. deified   12 years ago

      How many dispensaries have been raided under the color of Sen. Paul’s authority?

      President “The Drug War has been a failure and we need to rethink and decriminalize our marijuana laws” also has federal agents terrorizing entrepreneurs in Oakland.

      tl;dr – Shut the fuck up, Buttplug.

    2. generic Brand   12 years ago

      I don’t think that’s much of a lie. It really depends on how you smoke it, I think. If you smoke a blunt, there is no motivation to do anything other than eat and veg out. If you do a bong rip, you’re not effected quite the same way. I would imagine a vaporizer has an entirely different effect as well.

      1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

        My first experience with marijuana was the stoners who I worked with at a grocery store during high school. (I didn’t have any myself, but they smoked 2-3x a day) Those guys never wanted to do anything.

      2. Zeb   12 years ago

        I think it depends on the person more than anything. I know some very hard working people who smoke all the time.

        1. deified   12 years ago

          It’s also important to note that MJ isn’t one thing. Those little plants are made up of like a bajillion chemicals.

          /science

      3. John   12 years ago

        I agree with GB. They give marijuana for pain relief not depression. It doesn’t motivate you to work.

      4. Leigh   12 years ago

        We had guy here who was stoned most of time – best damn software coder I’ve ever seen – and I’ve seen a lot.

        1. Arkansaustrian Economics   12 years ago

          If you’re writing code, or any number of jobs, MJ will certainly help you work harder.

          I smoke a fair amount of high grade bud, each and every day. I work a lot better this way, because it helps with my stomach, among other things. I used to drink, and I thank God every day someone suggested green instead when I got out of the Army…I’m WAY more productive now.

          I’m sorry, but the cross-section of smokers through society makes it as plain as possible that smoking doesn’t make you lazy. I will stipulate that being lazy might lead you to smoke.

          1. itsnotmeitsyou   12 years ago

            I’m sorry, but the cross-section of smokers through society makes it as plain as possible that smoking doesn’t make you lazy. I will stipulate that being lazy might lead you to smoke.

            I think that’s just it right there. When I’m already feeling lazy, smoking makes me more lazy. I just want to veg and de-fuck for a while.

            Conversely, if I have shit to do that I would rather not (yard work and such), smoking makes me so focused on the task that armageddon would have to happen to distract me from it.

    3. Caleb Turberville   12 years ago

      …and Ketracel White takes away your incentive not to join in arms with the Dominion.

      1. RightNut   12 years ago

        nice DS9 reference.

    4. AuH20   12 years ago

      Doesn’t every drug but adder all basically do this?

      That’s the point of smoking a big ass bowl or having a few glasses of wine: To zone the fuck out and chill out after a hard day.

    5. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

      Back in the days when I smoked, I just wanted to sit around, listen to music, eat, and BS with my friends. Any actual work was difficult…

      1. Ted S.   12 years ago

        Doesn’t sound any different from your days on H&R.

        1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

          touche.

      2. Rasilio   12 years ago

        Wait, I’ve never done any drugs of any sort and that’s all I wanna do today, especially if you throw in some Dungeons and Dragons or Shadowrun

        1. AuH20   12 years ago

          Real men play World of Darkness.

          1. $park?   12 years ago

            Our regular group tried out Mage: The Ascension for a while, but the premise was just too screwed up. You get to be a mage with all these superawesome powers, but you can’t use them. And it’s even worse if someone actually sees you use them…

            1. AuH20   12 years ago

              I’m currently in a Vampire and a general WoD LARP. Holy shit does Vampire get talky. Jaw jaw is much bigger than war war in that one.

              1. $park?   12 years ago

                Our Mage game went a lot like that too before we gave up on it. The game mechanics aren’t too bad, when they ever get used.

              2. Agammamon   12 years ago

                You can change that – everytime someone gets talky you attack.

                The “beast” overcame you and you frenzied.

            2. Rasilio   12 years ago

              No the real problem with Mage is that at max level about half the powers were interchangable.

              it’s been a long time but at a minimum there was Matter, Forces, and Probability and at max level they were identical because of the way that Physics works in the real world.

          2. Rasilio   12 years ago

            I’d play WOD if it wasn’t for all the darkness.

            I actually used to play in a modified Mage campaign with one of the original WOD writers (Sam Chupp) and that was the part he stripped out of his own campaign too. As he liked to call it he preferred “The World of Mostly Dimness” so there was room for the PC’s to be heroes and actually make a difference.

            That said, I’ll still take Shadowrun so I can have my Wired Reflexes 2 and Dikoted Katana

            1. AuH20   12 years ago

              Wait, you play Shadowrun, but you bitch about WoD’s level of darkness? Shadowrun has a pretty dark base setting.

              1. Restoras   12 years ago

                Excuse the ignorance of this question but are these online games or tabletop?

                1. $park?   12 years ago

                  Tabletop.

                2. Rasilio   12 years ago

                  Tabletop Role Playing games.

                  Shadowrun is a game that merges Cybernetics and Magic into a world that was supposed to be our future. It is a silly sounding concept but it worked because the company who made it had the best world builders ever to work in the Role Playing industry. Little known fact, in it’s infancy the movie The Matrix was supposed to be based on a Novella set in this world, however the game company and Studio had creative differences and parted ways after the Studio paid the company a consulting fee and for the rights to use the Phrase “The Matrix” which was copywrittten as part of Shadowrun.

                  WOD is Shorthand for World of Darkness which was a single game universe with multiple overlapping games in it. The 3 most popular were Vampire, Werewolf, and Mage. Basically if you take the Underworld movies that is WOD (so close in fact that the authors of WOD sued the producers of Underworld for copyright infringement)

              2. Rasilio   12 years ago

                Eh the level of darkness in Shadowrun was very fluid, you could play REALLY dark or just a little dark. The main difference was that in WOD nothing the characters did was going to make things any better because in the end The Wyrm was gonna eat the world anyway. In Shadowrun there Megacorps were mendacious and would chew you up and spit you out for a buck but they were rarely actively evil and as a result if you played your cards right you could actually have heroic storylines and make the world a better place

                1. AuH20   12 years ago

                  New WoD has fixed that a bit and made it slightly less bleak.

                  1. Restoras   12 years ago

                    Cool. A friend of mine started a D&D game for our kids, since that’s what we played growing up, and a couple of other dads now play too.

          3. Alack   12 years ago

            Yes, but the question is: nWoD or oWoD?

          4. Rasilio   12 years ago

            Oh yeah, I thought that WOD was the game for Real Roleplayers?

            You know

            Real Men play Shadowrun
            Real Role Players play WOD
            Loonies play Toon
            Munchkins play D&D

            1. $park?   12 years ago

              Real Men play Shadowrun

              Because only a Real Man can lug around the backpack full of six-sided dice you need?

              Munchkins play D&D

              Sounds about right, though that covers pretty much any of the new d20 systems.

            2. Rasilio   12 years ago

              Like this…

              http://www.firedrake.org/roger/rpg/munchkin.html

        2. $park?   12 years ago

          +450d6

    6. Zeb   12 years ago

      “takes away your incentive to work”

      That doesn’t even make sense. Does marijuana somehow prevent you from getting paid?

    7. prolefeed   12 years ago

      I imagine Rand’s run across a few stoner slackers from time to time. Yeah, anecdotal evidence.

      Rigorous, peer-reviewed literature about people who do their damndest to not wind up in said literature … prolly not.

  39. AuH20   12 years ago

    So the latest issue of The Week has one of their article roundups, detailing the “No Fap” movement, which is apparently against jackin’ it to internet porn. The last article they highlight, and the one they give the most space too, is some dude from The Frisky arguing that internet porn is like drugs.

    Why do not of these people understand that I always go, “Is like drugs… which means it’s fucking awesome!”

    1. Ed   12 years ago

      No Fap February?

    2. Palin's Buttplug   12 years ago

      Doesn’t internet porn make you lazy?

  40. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

    “Spoiler alert: they’ll probably blame Republicans.”

    The Donkey Party officials or the trolls here?

    1. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Both.

  41. AuH20   12 years ago

    Ugh. I have a head cold today. Thanks, government ban on Sudafed, for keeping the good shit away from me!

    1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

      these days I just take aspirin, drink plenty of wine, and suffer through it. Playing video games seems to help the most.

      1. AuH20   12 years ago

        What, was your medical routine devised by Galen?

        1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

          yes – his early writings were the funniest.

  42. sulphurbottom   12 years ago

    Feds to Students: You Can’t Say That

    The new policy was announced in a joint letter from the Education Department and Justice Department to the University of Montana. The May 9 letter addressed the results of a year-long joint investigation by the departments into the school’s mishandling of several serious sexual-assault cases. The investigation determined that the university’s policies addressing sexual assault failed to comply with Title IV of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and Title IX of the Education Amendments of 1972.

    But the joint letter, which announced a “resolution agreement” with the university, didn’t stop there. It then proceeded to rewrite the federal government’s rules about sexual harassment and free speech on campus.

    If that sounds hyperbolic, consider the letter itself. The first paragraph declares that the Montana findings should serve as a “blueprint for colleges and universities throughout the country.” After outlining the specifics of the case, the letter states that only a stunningly broad definition of sexual harassment – “unwelcome conduct of a sexual nature” – will now satisfy federal statutory requirements. This explicitly includes “verbal conduct,” otherwise known as speech.

    1. AuH20   12 years ago

      I think that despite being a minority, most universities are fucking scared to death of their Fem-Gen departments and thus just roll over rather than deal with protests, etc.

      1. sulphurbottom   12 years ago

        I think you’re right. All they have to do is wave Larry Summers’s balls if anyone even begins to consider that maybe their victimology is not entirely good & true.

        1. AuH20   12 years ago

          Yeah, I think its not so much the power at individual campuses, it is that any that stuck their head up over the parapet would be instantly all over Jezebel and Feministing and such, and pretty soon non-profits would be organizing busing in students from other schools/non-profit workers (apparently, that is the industry you go into with a Fem-Gen degree). Plus, liberal social circles, who most of your administration and faculty belong to, will look down on you and exclude you. In practicality those circles may not be too pro-woman (see Polanski, Roman) but they tut at anyone who pisses off the victomology people because who are you to exclude marginalized groups, etc.

    2. WTF   12 years ago

      And they wonder why male enrollment is declining. It wouldn’t have anything to do with what a hostile and dangerous environment college has become for men, when asking for a date from someone who’s not interested can ruin your life.

      1. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

        Once young males discover it’s just as easy to get laid and not got $24K into debt to make it happen, colleges are pretty much fucked. Their entire business model these days rests on exponentially rising tuition rates to train an increasingly worthless cadre of administrative clerks and non-profit greivance-mongers.

        The ambitious males will be able to hide out in the STEM departments, for the most part, or go to tech colleges that are typically 70% men and thus protected from bullshit manufactured pharisaic outrages the fem/ethnic grievance cabal concoct, thanks to the sheer weight of numbers. Every other department, such as the humanities, will increasingly slide further into a calcified, incestuous intellectual feedback loop that will eventually collapse.

        1. robc   12 years ago

          Not just that, but my tech college is just now down to 70% male 20+ years after I graduated.

          And no Wymenz Studies Dept in sight. Or XXX Studies, for that matter.

          There is an advantage to everyone having to take calculus, even if it makes football recruiting harder.

  43. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

    OT: I passed the Bar exam.

    1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      Nice. Now you can join the group of assholes like Pro Lib!

      1. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

        paid asshole at that!

      2. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        It’s not that simple. First, you must make a sacrifice.

        1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

          He has to pay for a one way ticket to space?

          1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

            That comes later. The lawyer space station is undergoing repairs, after the battle with the Freemason L-2 habitat.

            1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

              Why do you need a space station for a one way trip for…somebody?

              1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

                Fuel depot.

            2. Loki   12 years ago

              Sounds like someone’s been watchin Gundam

              1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

                If you mean me, I don’t know anything about that except that I’ve heard the name before.

                1. Loki   12 years ago

                  Giant robot Anime. There’s been several incarnations over the years. In truth the only one I’ve watched was Gundam Wing. Pretty much all of them involve some kind of large L-2 colony that rebels against Earth and starts off some kind of civil war between them and Earth where they fight in big armored “Mobile Suits” called Gundams. Which is a really simplistic explanation, but you get the gist, I’m sure.

                  1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

                    I just picked L-2 to avoid the predictable L-5.

    2. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

      Woo-hoo! You’re all growsed up now!

    3. sulphurbottom   12 years ago

      Congrats! Job?

      1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

        Not yet. I had something “legal” part-time, and I was laid off from it. They might call me back though. Still sending out resumes, etc.

        1. sulphurbottom   12 years ago

          Good luck & godspeed.

          1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

            Thanks. I may start volunteering at the Public Defender’s office just to stay busy until something comes along.

            1. RBS   12 years ago

              Do you want to do defense work? You could also volunteer for things like the Innocence Project. If not defense you see if your local Probate Court needs help, they usually do and you can hang out at the courthouse and meet other attorneys.

        2. Resto Druid FTW   12 years ago

          Grab an easy gig as a law clerk or get on the appointment list. Trail by fire FTW!

    4. Ted S.   12 years ago

      Oh boy. The last thing we need is another lawyer. :-p

      1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

        We’ve got to replace RC Dean somehow!

    5. db   12 years ago

      I read that at first as “Bear Exam.”

      Congratulations!

      1. Ted S.   12 years ago

        I think it’s Jesse who’s studying for the bear exam.

    6. Fist of Etiquette   12 years ago

      I never pass a bar.

      1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

        That’s just because you live so close to the gay district.

      2. $park?   12 years ago

        Would you if you knew there was going to be a test?

        1. some guy   12 years ago

          Taste test?

          1. $park?   12 years ago

            They’ll only let you in if you score really high on the TV trivia game.

    7. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

      Nicely done.

    8. Brett L   12 years ago

      Elspeth, we love you but now we have to kill you for your success in mutating into a larval politician.

      1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

        Just because a lot of legislators are attorneys doesn’t mean all attorneys are legislators.

        1. AuH20   12 years ago

          Sorry, Elspeth, but you know we can’t take that kind of chance.

    9. AuH20   12 years ago

      A lawyer? Congratulations! Your utility as ballast, kindling, and roadkill have all increased!

      1. Restoras   12 years ago

        Don’t forget targets for experimental ammunition.

      2. db   12 years ago

        Don’t forget lobster bait!

        1. Restoras   12 years ago

          Do you mean lobstah? I have no idea what lobster is.

    10. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

      SWEET! Spread them libertarian values through the legal system, pleeze.

      1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

        I will try 🙂 I’m amazed at how knee jerk liberal some are.

    11. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

      Congratulations! What practice area are you looking for?

      1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

        Thanks Pro L. I’m not picky. Criminal Defense, estate planning, family law. Not necessarily in that order. Actually, it’s a race to whoever pays me first, since the student loans are needing to be paid much too soon.

        1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

          You could hang out a shingle or join a small general practice. I know the job market is really bad for new graduates, but there are a lot of lawyers pushing retirement age, so that may let up some. Not like the government isn’t working hard to create whole new areas of litigation.

          1. Elspeth Flashman   12 years ago

            The hang out a shingle part looks better & better to me than it used to. We shall see.

  44. sarcasmic   12 years ago

    Hawaii preschool bans teacher’s assistant from eating homemade lunches in front of the children

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..ldren.html

    1. OldMexican   12 years ago

      Must’ve been lunches too delicious for mere mortal (and young) eyes.

      1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        The lunches were Spamless and, therefore, had to go.

    2. DJF   12 years ago

      “”””The preschool prides itself on its school dinners, which have been praised for ‘best practices’ in nutrition by national accreditation standards and the USDA Child and Adult Care Food Program”””‘.

      Isn’t this child abuse?

      1. Rasilio   12 years ago

        In other words lots of veggies the kids hate and the teacher had twinkies

    3. prolefeed   12 years ago

      So they are ENCOURAGING shame eating?

      The hell?

    4. AuH20   12 years ago

      I would hate this. I hate mayo so I make versions of things like chicken salad, etc. with sour cream or other shit for lunch a good amount. Fuck you, Hawaii!

    5. Agammamon   12 years ago

      “However, Mrs Lee O’Connell said the 10-minute break did not give her enough time to enjoy her lunch.”

      That’s because the break is for you to eat the motherfucker, not “enjoy” it. You want to enjoy lunch, do that on your own time.

      More seriously – who the fuck give a ten minute break for lunch? That should be 20-30 minimum.

    6. Loki   12 years ago

      24-year-old switched to organic diet because of allergies

      Better to have an allergic reaction and break in hives, or depending on severity, go into anaphylactic shock and die in front of the kids than eat something in front of them other than the swill that gets shoveled down their gullets everyday. It might make them feel bad that she doesn’t have to eat the same shit they do.

      Ugh, fuck these fucking fuckers.

  45. AuH20   12 years ago

    Holy shit, At Home with Julia is brutal. You Aussies really liked that Kevin Rudd fellow, huh?

  46. AuH20   12 years ago

    So, I love that NBC has had to renew both Community and Parks and Rec because they can no longer launch a sitcom to save their lives. It’s really funny when a network has to keep renewing a show that they clearly hate. And its doubly funny when it is two shows (though I think they dislike Parks slightly less, they clearly have never quite known what to do with it)

    1. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

      As long as P&R is on the air, I’m one happy camper. I don’t think I’ve loved a sitcom as much as I love that one. And two episodes from last season were nicely libertarianish – the one where leslie bails out a boook store and the one where Leslie has a forum to ask if people are beter off than they were a year ago.

      1. AuH20   12 years ago

        Yeah, but the “Are you better off now?” one was annoying in how shrilly liberal Leslie can get. “I’m doing this for your own good! Don’t you get that, you peons?!” seems to be a big theme of her character (though wrapped up in a very nice way) and the show seems to, in any political forum, have to mock the tea party.

        Ron may be awesome, but overall the show kind of hates people who dislike government (or it considers all of them save Ron to be venal and corrupt).

        I still love the show, but that angle of it bugs the ever loving shit out of me.

        1. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

          I have the totally opposite view. Most of the time Ron beats Leslie, even though Leslie is supposed to be the main protagonist. I saw that episode (Are you better off?) as satirizing Leslie’s ideology. Much like many 30 Rock episodes satirized Liz Lemon’s ideology.

          1. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

            Also, Chris Pratt is so awesome – I hope he stays on the show even when he becomes a huge star (which he will).

            1. EDG reppin' LBC   12 years ago

              You just like Chris Pratt because he’s big and hairy. 😉

              1. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

                Well, ya know – that doesn’t hurt 🙂

                But I prefer Nick Offerman.

                1. BakedPenguin   12 years ago

                  you’ve probably seen this before, but: Woodshop.

          2. AuH20   12 years ago

            See, Leslie is too beloved and has too many of her coworkers jump through hoops to help her (because we are constantly being told how good a friend Leslie is) to be a parody like Liz Lemon. Liz Lemon was legitimately a somewhat pathetic human being, and thus Baldwin’s relative success at life was a nice counterpoint. Leslie has achieved her dream of going into politics and has married the love of her life. I don’t think she is satire.

            I mean, Parks and Rec does not have a “TGS Hates Women” equivalent yet.

        2. RBS   12 years ago

          Ron was on fire this season! Leslie bailing out the bookstore was great.

        3. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

          Swing Vote was the other episode I was thinking of where Ron beat Leslie.

          And you can’t go wrong with Jamm.

      2. MJGreen   12 years ago

        I stopped watching P&R this year. The second and third seasons are classic TV, but I thought it got pretty terrible in the election year and I found no reason to continue on this year.

  47. Coeus   12 years ago

    Atlantic still franticaly doing damage control for the Pres:

    Why it should be harder to impeach the President.

    1. John   12 years ago

      Impeachment is a head dodge. It is setting the bar way high so that when an otherwise horrible scandal doesn’t meet it, they can claim it was really no big deal.

    2. OldMexican   12 years ago

      Explaining why it “should” be more difficult to impeach the president is an admission that there’s something in the scandals that warrant impeachment.

      1. Pro Libertate   12 years ago

        I think impeachment should be relatively easy. If a president is caught in blatant lie, impeach. If there’s corruption, impeach. If there’s illegality going on, impeach. We should have trouble getting a full term from the kinds of presidents we’ve been getting lately.

    3. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      It should be harder than having happened twice in the history of the country (and neither time did the defendant end up being convicted and removed from office)?

      1. John   12 years ago

        But if it happens to our guy, that is once too often.

    4. WTF   12 years ago

      I’m sure they felt the same way about Nixon.

      1. Agammamon   12 years ago

        He doesn’t count, things were different, he was a republican.

  48. OldMexican   12 years ago

    President Obama pledged to end the “scourge” of sexual assault in the military while acknowledging there was no “silver bullet.”

    I think that, at this point, most women in the military will settle for a lead Minie slug.

  49. Coeus   12 years ago

    But were they salty ham tears?

    I cried when I watched this trailer. Because it makes me cry to watch unapologetically fat, confident women being really good at their jobs, being recognised for it, and making their revolutionary bodies part of that success. It makes me cry like a big feminist baby.

    1. John   12 years ago

      Honey, if you want me to pay for your healthcare, you are going to have to do something about that fat ass and the type II diabetes that comes with it.

      1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

        Relax – the author and actress are both Australian, so I’m paying for them.

    2. WTF   12 years ago

      Hey, if you want to be a big fat land whale, go for it. Just don’t expect me to pay for any of your issues, and don’t try to tell me that it’s in any way attractive.

      1. RBS   12 years ago

        land whale

        Ham Planet.

        1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

          skywhale

          1. Coeus   12 years ago

            That never gets less frightening.

          2. WTF   12 years ago

            GAAHHH!!!

          3. Restoras   12 years ago

            If I saw that in the sky I’d start shooting at it.

            1. Coeus   12 years ago

              I’d start re-reading my Lovecraft.

    3. AuH20   12 years ago

      Every critic seems to be fapping themselves silly to this movie, but I have never fucking heard of Rebel Wilson (also, seriously?) and have no idea if she is in any way talented.

      1. RBS   12 years ago

        Isn’t she the the chick version of Jonah Hill when he was a fatass?

        1. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

          I think she’s actually Jonah Hill in drag.

    4. Brett L   12 years ago

      She hasn’t felt this good since she ruffied herself and actually got date raped!

    5. T   12 years ago

      Being a fatass is revolutionary? I guess America is the revolutionary vanguard again. Ladies of America, revolt!

      1. NeonCat   12 years ago

        Does this mean Michelle Obama is displaying counter-revolutionary behavior?

    6. Loki   12 years ago

      Ugh, a feministing link? Really? Why would anyone click that and do that to themselves when there are so many better ways to abuse oneself.

  50. Coeus   12 years ago

    Stop using facts to make teen moms feel bad.

    This part is infuriating:

    A lot of these ads include the stuff about the cost of raising a child, which once again, is not particular to the age of the mother. What gets to me about these are the class implications of this kind of approach ? i.e. if you don’t have this kind of money, then you have no place being a mother. Sure, young folks likely have less independent sources of income, but we can’t decontextualize this from the class status of their families, and thus their access to financial support. Economic arguments like this one serve to reinforce racist, eugenicist notions that poor folks are unfit to parent.

    Just keep pooping them out. Don’t worry, someone will pay for it.

    1. RBS   12 years ago

      Since when did pointing out that someone is poor become racist? This pisses me off too. I mean really just keep bitching and bitching but at the end of the day you can’t feed a baby “love.”

    2. AuH20   12 years ago

      If they can’t afford to feed and clothe their children, then yes, they are unfit to parent.

    3. Zeb   12 years ago

      Yeah, I hate that. It is quite accurate and helpful to point out that if you can’t afford to raise a child, having one is going to make your life more difficult.

      1. Heroic Mulatto   12 years ago

        IT’S ALL FREE ON MY EBT!!!!!!

        1. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

          Swipe! Swipe!

      2. Virginian   12 years ago

        No no, it’s ok. The government will give them money. Free money from the government!

    4. Agammamon   12 years ago

      “i.e. if you don’t have this kind of money, then you have no place being a mother.”

      Yeah, pretty much. Being a mother is not about you dear, its about your children. If you can’t/aren’t willing to take care of them (and that takes a certain amount of money) then don’t have them just to make yourself feel good.

      1. Agammamon   12 years ago

        Though the emphasis on the cost is overdone anyway. It doens’t take that much money to raise decent kids.

        1. RBS   12 years ago

          This is also true. I think the overblown costs associated with raising a child is people assuming they need to buy everything fancy and brand new. Also, making your own baby food is so much cheaper than buying it.

        2. Restoras   12 years ago

          You are not factoring in the cost of iPhones and designer jeans, you monster.

          1. Agammamon   12 years ago

            Oh I’m factoring those costs in – how soon can I get the brats, I mean, little angles into the work force so I can afford ’em.

            Monocles don’t buy themselves.

        3. $park?   12 years ago

          Seriously. Want to raise children for a reasonable cost? Learn to say “no.”

    5. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

      Economic arguments like this one serve to reinforce racist, eugenicist notions that poor folks are unfit to parent.

      I suspect that this person has a different take on Honey-Boo-Boo’s family.

  51. Loki   12 years ago

    Spoiler alert: they’ll probably blame Republicans.

    1. “It’s the Rethuglicans fault!”
    2. “SEKWESTER!”
    3. “CHIMPYMCBUSHITLERHALIBURTAN!”
    4. “Teh KOCHTOPUS!”

    Did I leave any out?

    1. Auric Demonocles   12 years ago

      Stimulus wasn’t big enough?

      1. deified   12 years ago

        Big enough to get you knocked up!

        I’ll be here all week.

  52. itsnotmeitsyou   12 years ago

    So, I just got home from a trip to the People’s Democratic Republic of California and I’ve just got one thing to say.

    FUCK LA!

    The people are vapid, the prices/taxes are fucking ridiculous, the heat is unbearable, and you aren’t allowed to wipe your ass without permission from the gov.

    While I was there, I got called a “racist asshole” because I didn’t want some guy’s CD that he literally shoved into my chest to get me to take.

    1. EDG reppin' LBC   12 years ago

      Sorry you had a bad time out here. Next time, come down to Long Beach, and we’ll get drunk and fall down.

      1. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

        come down to Long Beach, and we’ll get drunk and fall down.

        See, that’s a great tourist campaign right there

      2. itsnotmeitsyou   12 years ago

        I was in Long Beach for 3 days. I stayed on the Queen Mary. I actually met Jesse while I was staying at the Farmer’s Daughter later in the week. I posted in a few AM and PM threads that I was coming out, wish I would have had more people to hang out with that weren’t stereotypical Californians. Fuck, those people are idiots.

  53. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

    Anyone know what is best for a fucking awful allergy headache? I never had any kind of hay fever until the last couple years. Now I’ve had a debilitating headache for 2 days (I really hope it’s an allergy headache and not a tumor or zombie virus). Should I see an allergist, or go the OTC drug route? What kind of OTC drugs are best?

    1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

      Flonase is a miracle drug.

    2. Coeus   12 years ago

      Excedrin (tylenol, asprin and caffeine). It’s the only thing that works for my sinus headaches.

      1. BakedPenguin   12 years ago

        Excedrin also contains acetaminophen. Do not take if your liver is in anyway compromised.

        1. Coeus   12 years ago

          Well, yeah. That’s what tylenol is.

    3. invisible furry hand   12 years ago

      Speaking as a dust allergy sufferer, I found rinsing your nose and sinuses out with salt water can help ease the pressure. Of course, the only long-term solution was to have desensitising shots and tag-team antihistamines (Claratyne in the morning, Zyrtec at night) in the meantime

      1. Coeus   12 years ago

        I’ve been using immunotherapy in the form of drops under the tongue. I had the shots as a child, but this is supposed to fix it completely.

    4. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

      I’m-a try all of those. I have been thinking of a neti pot (salt water nose rinse), but it kind of squicks me out. But anything is better than this headache.

      1. Coeus   12 years ago

        Don’t use the neti. You could get brain parasites. Use a pressurized saline stream can from the pharmacist (it’s otc).

      2. sarcasmic   12 years ago

        Flonase requires a scrip and you’ve got to use it every day. But damn, it makes you feel like you don’t have allergies anymore. Amazing stuff.

      3. Zeb   12 years ago

        The Neti pot thing is great, though I use the squeeze bottle, not the little tea pot thing. It is weird at first, but not at all unpleasant like getting fresh water up your nose, especially if you warm it up.

        I take Benadryl pretty much all the time for respiratory allergies. I find it works better than other antihistamines I have tried (and is way less expensive than the newer ones). But it makes a lot of people sleepy, so it may not be great for during the daytime.

      4. Restoras   12 years ago

        I use a Waterpick Sinusense. It’s a pulse irrigation device. Helps a lot. Just make sure you are using distilled water or boil your own (LET IT COOL BEFORE USING!!!) which is what I do.

        http://www.amazon.com/Waterpik…..B003QY8C4I

      5. DontShootMe   12 years ago

        I didn’t find Flonase all that helpful. FWIW, Claritin works well on my allergy symptoms, but I end up with that lovely allergy headache. Allegra does not work quite as well on the other symptoms, but it does seem to stop the headache (takes a day or two).

        Most docs write scrip for Flonase like Pez, so it shouldn’t be too hard to give that a whirl, it works for lots of folks, and it did help the post nasal drip…

    5. $park?   12 years ago

      Best thing I’ve ever taken for that is Advil Cold and Sinus Liquigels. It’s fucking retarded that you have to go through the pharmacy to get it, but totally worth the hassle.

    6. EDG reppin' LBC   12 years ago

      Motrin. 600 mg.

      1. Redmanfms   12 years ago

        Known to those who’ve been in the service as Vitamin M.

        Curative for everything but sucking chest wounds and foot funk.

    7. $park?   12 years ago

      Now I’ve had a debilitating headache for 2 days (I really hope it’s an allergy headache and not a tumor or zombie virus).

      Also, if allergy meds don’t really help out that much you may want to consider having it checked out. My real problem turned out to be low level migraines.

    8. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

      I just took a Mucinex sinus & headache pill (acetaminophen, expectorant and decongestant). We’ll see how that does.

      1. $park?   12 years ago

        This is just my experience, but ibuprofen always beats acetaminophen. In any case, good luck.

        1. Kaptious Kristen   12 years ago

          Thx $parks. Ibu sometimes gives me a hangover, so I tend to avoid it.

          1. $park?   12 years ago

            Wow, that sucks. I’ve had reactions a little bit like that from other NSAIDs (migraine meds) but never from standard ibuprofen.

    9. AuH20   12 years ago

      As I said above: Times like these, fucking wish Sudafed was legal.

    10. LTC(ret) John   12 years ago

      Both – go to the allergist and try Zyrtec.

    11. General Butt Naked   12 years ago

      Peruvian flake.

    12. Red Rocks Rockin   12 years ago

      I have ridiculous weed pollen and hay fever allergies and find that Claritin or Benadryl clear up the symptoms pretty fast.

      If the OTC stuff doesn’t clear it up in another couple days, get a doctor’s appt ASAP.

    13. Lord Humungus   12 years ago

      what, no love for my wine + aspirin + video game cure?

  54. Loki   12 years ago

    From the women are crazy bitches file:
    Woman bit her live-in boyfriend’s penis when he refused to have sex with her

    I’m not sure why the dude refused (other than the fact that she looks kind of homely with dead vacant eyes). Then I noticed “Boyfriend refuses to press charges over bedroom attack” which makes it even more confusing. He’s obviously some kind of super-duper submissive beta male, so why wouldn’t he just give her what she wants? Plus, hello, she’s fucking psycho. This can’t be news to him. You don’t turn down a psychotic uber-bitch, especially if she’s near your manhood.

    After reading the article, both these people seem like real “winners.” I think it’s time to just nuke Florida from orbit, it’s the only way to be sure.

    1. sarcasmic   12 years ago

      Posted over an hour ago.

      http://reason.com/blog/2013/05…..nt_3753768

      Try to keep up.

      1. Loki   12 years ago

        It’s not my fault I had to do work shit this morning and was late for Mourning Lynx. STOP OTHERING THE EMPLOYED! *runs off sobbing*

        Although I should have known the king of the daily fails would have already done it.

        Also, it’s kind of surprising how many different stories you get when you google “woman bites man’s dick because refused to have sex with her.” Maybe we should start a political pressure group to “do something” about the dick biting “epidemic.” “If it saves just one penis!”

    2. tarran   12 years ago

      Do not nuke Florida; a dear friend of mine, a beautiful half-German half-Argentine ex Nasa Project Manager works there.

      1. Loki   12 years ago

        We’ll have to arrange a way to get the few useful and/ or attractive people out without tipping off the trailer trash, dick biters, and misc. other dregs to flee like rats from a sinking ship.

        I haven’t thought it through entirely. But there’s time, I haven’t built my orbiting space station/ orbital bombartment platform/ zero-g whorehouse yet.

    3. OldMexican   12 years ago

      Woman bit her live-in boyfriend’s penis when he refused to have sex with her

      So it’s a hate-crime, right?

      Penis-envy and all…

  55. Coeus   12 years ago

    Yet another reason to hate VAWA.

    I didn’t even know about this one.

    1. tarran   12 years ago

      I don’t know. It seems that we have an opportunity to send Mary Stack of Fort Worth Texas to jail for a very long time for her years of griefing under a pseudonym – especially her attempts to get Heller in trouble with Brandeis and John in trouble with various people. 😉

      Don’t worry, Mary, you may be a vile excuse for a human being, but we won’t press charges because we have a moral code that protects even malevolent stalkers like you.

  56. Coeus   12 years ago

    I’m going here tomorrow. I’m excited. It looks awesome.

    1. Brett L   12 years ago

      Niice

      1. Coeus   12 years ago

        It’s gonna be like getting drunk in a Tool album cover.

        1. Marc F Cheney   12 years ago

          I hope not the one where they’re all sitting around watching a guy, um, contort himself.

          1. Coeus   12 years ago

            I make no apologies for my flexibility.

            Though I’m pretty sure that’d get me kicked out.

          2. Also Ran   12 years ago

            According to Wikipedia, that is a chick doing the contorting.

    2. $park?   12 years ago

      Holy shit, that place looks crazy awesome.

    3. EDG reppin' LBC   12 years ago

      Awesome! The wife and I are in early planning stages for a Euro trip. This could be a nice diversion.

      1. Coeus   12 years ago

        It makes it really hard to get motivated to get out of a dead-end job when I get to do stuff like this.

    4. T   12 years ago

      That looks totally sweet, dude.

  57. cavalier973   12 years ago

    Christian Private School that used an Answers in Genesis test for its fourth-grade students, and that was subsequently exoriated by the atheist community for “child abuse”, was on the verge of closing down. Not anymore.

    1. OldMexican   12 years ago

      Private property and freedom of association – how does that work, again?

      1. Zeb   12 years ago

        Pretty much like that.

    2. lap83   12 years ago

      Dogmatic atheists confuse me. It’s like they confuse their ego with universal truth.

      1. $park?   12 years ago

        People like that ruin it for the rest of us. They can’t just let people do what they want to do and believe what they want to believe.

        1. Mercutio   12 years ago

          “It is intolerable to us that an erroneous thought should exist anywhere in the world, however secret and powerless it may be.”

      2. Redmanfms   12 years ago

        It’s like they confuse their ego with universal truth.

        They become become much easier to understand when you realize that despite their protestations to the contrary, atheism is their religion.

        1. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

          Hush now, atheism isn’t a religion!

          1. $park?   12 years ago

            Atheism isn’t, anti-theism probably is.

      3. Zeb   12 years ago

        Creationists aren’t a whole lot better, confusing an ancient work of fiction with universal truth.

        1. cavalier973   12 years ago

          Yeah, but the food is better over here.

        2. Arkansaustrian Economics   12 years ago

          I’d say when they’re pushy about it, and use it to condescend to others, they’re equally annoying shit-faced cunts.

  58. OldMexican   12 years ago

    Former IRS chief Steve Miller, whose resignation was planned before the agency’s political targeting practices came to light but announced afterward as a sign the administration took the scandal seriously, will testify before the House Ways & Means Committee later today

    At the same time, committee Democrats perpetuating the myth that the IRS was flooded with 501(c)(4) petitions right after the Citizens United SCOTUS decision.

  59. EDG reppin' LBC   12 years ago

    Dick Trickle is dead. RIP.

    1. Coeus   12 years ago

      A great example of typical Houston cops.

      1. Coeus   12 years ago

        wasn’t supposed to be a reply.

  60. cavalier973   12 years ago

    Scarborough on IRS scandal: This makes it harder to trust the government on gun background checks, doesn’t it?

  61. Eduard van Haalen   12 years ago

    You know that florist that got sued by the Washington state Attorney-General for not servicing a gay wedding? The florist has countersued the AG for violation of freedom of religion, freedom of speech and freedom of association:

    http://www.adfmedia.org/files/…..ersuit.pdf (go to p. 7)

  62. Zeb   12 years ago

    I think it was. I never said they were consistent or coherent in their beliefs. And the left has never been terribly monolithic, so saying that “they” did this or that is kind of silly. Some did, some didn’t.

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