A,M. Links: Obama Unveils Overdue Budget, Puerto Rico Reforms Pensions, South Koreans Not Rattled by the Nuke-y North


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  1. A little more accustomed to crazy neighbors than most, South Koreans aren’t letting the nuclear saber-rattling to the north bring them down.

    Pre-38th attitude in a post-38th world.

    1. It’s not like this situation is unparalleled, Fist.

      1. You’ll have to forgive him, he zoned out.

        1. Bastards

        2. Getting all depressed about it can leave you in a mental no-man’s-land.

          1. One of these days it’s just going to be lights out for North Korea.

            1. Unfortunately there’s nothing really preventing the status quo… which is do or say stupid/aggressive things, force international recognition through crisis meetings, extort from world money to continue to prop up regime (though the money is usually given in food and such…).

              Use that money/items to continue to exert total control over your population. Use China’s willingness to prop you up, just so you can be a pain to the US, to help stay alive.

              When money starts to dry up, or they start to feel left out or they want something new….


              It’s a crappy equilibrium which leaves millions suffering horribly, but it seems a stable equilibrium nonetheless.

  2. No charges against 50yr old New Hampshire police chief who offered to drop charges against college student if she allowed him to take nude pictures of her.
    He did lose his job. For now. Give it a couple years and I’m sure he’ll be reinstated with a fat check for back pay.

    1. I almost want to say that this sort of thing is worse than beating people up or shooting their dogs. Those things are at least things that they might conceivable have to do as part of their jobs. But this is just plain abuse of power.

      1. He’s the real victim here. I mean, he lost his job. He doesn’t know how to do anything else except use force and coercion to get his way. This makes him unfit to be part of society except as a police officer. That’s why he should be reinstated right away. What else is he going to do with is life?

        1. And was he trained to not offer up deals to the accused in return for sexual favors?

          Clearly this is not his fault because he lacked proper training.

          1. “Was that wrong? Was I not supposed to do that? I tell ya, I gotta plead ignorance on this one.”

    2. Nah; he’ll probably be offered a slot as a “consultant” at some ridiculous hourly fee.

    3. We can only hope he faces federal charges for deprivation of rights, attempted fraud, etc. Also, if he used his cellphone at all, those things are made in other states, making this an interstate crime (think Amish scissors).

      This asshole could still burn. Not likely, but still possible.

      1. It specifically said all criminal charges were dropped.

  3. Add Maryland to the list of states taking advantage of public panic over Newtown to restrict self-defense rights.

    Getting a lot of use out of those little caskets.

    1. And Oregon too. Today is the first hearing for 4 gun control bills (bans carry on school grounds, bans carry in the state capitol, universal background checks, and additional live fire requirements for concealed permit). The swing vote on the committee, normally a gun rights supporter, had already telegraphed that he’ll support universal background checks.

      What a shitty day.

      1. I’m a little surprised the first two weren’t already on the books.

        1. Ky allows carry in the state capitol too, just not the either houses floor or in committee meeting rooms.

          After 911, they put in metal detectors at the doors of the Cap. A large percentage of the employees in the building pulled out concealed weapons, handed them to the guard, went thru detector, then reconcealed weapon.

          The detectors went away after a few weeks.

        2. Yes, Oregon has been the outlier which is one of the arguments used by proponents. The same logic doesn’t work for gun control restrictions where Oregon is in the minority. Note also that both are only by holders of concealed handgun licenses, not a general right to carry.

          1. The capitol ban bill is Mulford Act style retaliation for a pro gun rally across the street about two months ago featuring slung long guns and holstered pistols. Some of those attending walked into the capitol building.

            Absolutely no incidents occurred other than hoplophobe legislators said later that the sight of armed men was just too much. No mention of the state police and other LEOs who carry there every single day

    2. ‘Beretta Leaves Maryland Because Of Stricter Gun Laws’

      Always liked their shotguns for target shooting.

      Come to Mississippi.

  4. Case dropped against millionaire who ‘ran over NYPD officer’s foot’ in $250,000 Ferrari outside exclusive Soho hotel

    The whole thing is on video. This guy is lucky the cop didn’t kill him.

  5. Ah, Seattle. That place where we’re constantly reminded that cops don’t harass drunks, are held extra-accountable for their malfeasance and magical unicorns shit golden nuggets.

    Well, all of that’s bullshit.

    1. The City’s use-of-force expert, Gregory Yacoubian, a lawyer in Los Angeles and former LAPD lieutenant-

      Stop right there.

      1. What? You don’t think a former LAPD cop is an expert in use of force? Hell, he could probably write a book on how to fuck somebody up.

        1. Chapter 3 – Use of Telephone Book.

          Be sure to use a medium sized Yellow Pages – strike about the head and you will deliver a goodly blow, but without specific marks or trauma.

          1. “If your force has gone online, soap or oranges wrapped in towels will have a similar effect.”

  6. An elderly retired farmer convicted of repeated sexual offences involving minors will be forced to go to jail unless he buys a pair of trousers with a fly that closes

    1. farmer, farmer sitting on a fence…

      or something like that.

    2. He told the court he just started to unbutton his trousers to scare the girls.

      Dude. You’re 80, of course its going to scare young girls when they see your balls hanging to your knees.

  7. Suspect and officer kill each other in interrogation room.

    1. two men enter, no man leaves.

    2. There is something very fishy there. Summary execution gone awry? Why did the cop even have a firearm in an interrogation room with a suspected murderer?

      1. Probably because he has a small penis. I’ve been told that that’s the only reason people ever carry guns.

      2. The word trickling out is that there may have been two officers in the interrogation room. They said all the details are hazy but definitively said the suspect shot the cop to death first. How they were able to determine that, and only that, “fact” is beyond my comprehension. Meh, I’m not surprised.

    3. Clearly we should ban guns in police stations & ban police from carrying guns.

      1. Just ban police.

    4. In the second picture, the fat guy to the right with his smartphone seems super nonchalant about a murder-suicide having just happened at his workplace.

      “Not much, just chillin, u?”
      “Got some time, meet me @ Applebee’s?”

      1. Applebee’s unconfrontational menu is a recognized treatment for PTSD.

  8. Ohio courts still routinely jail people who fail to pay fines and fees, even though that was long ago ruled illegal.

    The correct course of action is to shoot them and their dogs.

    1. I knew students in Los Angeles who went to court for parking and traffic violations. They would claim poverty to the judge and offer to do a few days instead. They would be out in a couple hours.

      Being a broke student at the time myself, I would have done the same.

      1. The traffic court here gives you $20 a day credit. So with $200 in fines and fees you get a cool 10 days.

        1. There was probably some formula like that in LA too. But then actual criminals would get arrested and the cops would simply send the traffic people home to free up the cell.

          1. Well, by all accounts, Men’s Central Jail in LA is like going to Gladiator school. Them first couple of hours might be a lot worse than 10 days somewhere else.

            1. My friends were Marines Reservists and Sailors – so their judgement and idea of “a good deal” are certainly suspect.

              1. But they could probably handle a few hours in the slammer.

  9. Primate Friday. Baseball’s hottest hitter touches his monkey for good luck.

    1. Would you like to touch my monkey?

      1. Are you insulting my monkey!?

        1. that’s not a monkey… this is a monkey

          1. I’m pretty sure that’s a teletubby.

      2. Could you please tell the monkey to point to where the bad man touched you for the jury?

    2. Before clicking on the link, I’d like to know if that’s a real monkey, or a euphemism for something else.

      1. Real monkey. I would never use the Primate Friday signifier. The Urkobold crew would lynch me.

        1. Are you familiar with the Death of a Thousand Feces?

          1. Flung by various lower primates, ugh!

            1. Highly trained monkeys, repurposed from the Simianspear program.

    3. For the record, Tampa has its own monkeys and will be ready for the next series. And the Mystery Monkey of Tampa Bay will kick this monkey’s ass.

      1. Furious George, what have they done to your face? Smithers, I’m afraid this monkey is going to need most of your skin.

  10. Since the South Koreans aren’t worried why should the US be worried? And since all South Korea only spends 2% GDP on defense compared to the more then 4% the US spends it appears the whole country is not worried that much about North Korea.

    So if they are not worried why not pull US troops out of South Korea? The South Koreans have twice the population and much more then ten times the economy of North Korea, its time for them to take care of their own defense without the US. The US can’t afford Defense Welfare for our ‘allies’

    1. South Koreans can afford not to worry because they know that we worry on their behalf.

      Like Winona said to Raylan the other night.

    2. No one in South Korea is worried, it’s not even a topic of conversation.

      Like….literally nothing is happening here. CNN and the news outlets need to chill the fuck ‘oot.

      The NoKos have reassured China that nothing is going to happen (not that that means anything.) It’s just a dog/pony show to rile up the west so generals take him seriously or he’s doing it for aid.

      1. I’m not saying Kim will do anything, but the history is replete wiht examples of whack job tyrants who said “I’m gonna do it! Just watch me!” and were ignored by everyone, only to then ask “Why didn’t we have any warning that whack job was going to do this?”.

        Just sayin’.

        1. Fair enough, I suppose. The general consensus here is just same-old same-old. Although it’s true that SoKos have been living in such a fucked up situation their whole lives that they are COMPLETELY anestesticized about the threat up north.

          I remain unconcerned, but hey. I also don’t live in Seoul.

          1. “they are COMPLETELY anestesticized”


          2. Where are you then?

            I was in Daegu.

    3. If the USA ended defense subsidies then South Korea would have to up their defense budget.

    4. Twice the population and a huge technological advantage (SK’s weapons industries are rapidly catching up to ours in terms of producing quality equipment) but still today a large numerical disadvantage, large enough to give the Norks the impression that they would stand a chance with the US removed from the picture.

      While I agree that we should pull out and leave them to their own devices, it would probably be a good idea to give them 10 years advanced notice so they could maybe bump their defense spending up to 3% of GDP and even out the Norths numerical superiority.

      1. A Nork invasion would last until they hit the first grocery stores. Then it’s over.

        1. Nork is Australian slang for breasts. You can imagine what image sprang to mind when I read your post

  11. Video of manly officer tasing pregnant woman.

    1. Maternity clothing is just so damn concealing these days!

    2. White denies touching the police officer. ‘I’m pulling on my daughter’s father. I did not touch a police officer. I know not to touch a police officer,’ she told KSDK.

      Whether she did or not, I love the quote.

  12. I’d like to see this one descend into a life of deviant debauchery, but alas she’s a Nickelodeon star, not Disney.

    1. Indeed.

    2. Yep, my wife thinks I’m weird for thinking she’s hot.

      1. I think you’re weird for thinking Ke$ha is hot.

        1. I’d hit them both.Preferably at the same time.

    3. Goddammit. Why can I not see the DM links today? Fuck you internets!

    4. Counterexample: Alanis Morissette

    5. Well, she actually isn’t a bad singer. Unlike the disney girls.

      I do tend to wander by when the kids are watching this show.

      1. Wander by? Hell, I sit down and watch. I don’t DVR it though – at least not yet.

    6. The fact that you would choose Victoria Justice over Daniella Monet proves you are a closeted homosexual reprobate.

      1. I dunno about him being closeted or such, but I agree with your choice, HM.

        1. Here’s both of them together.


          I’m sticking with my original decision. I mean, it’s nearly impossible to make jeans look better than that.

      2. The fact that all you jokers get your jollies watching young girls on Nik and Dis proves you’re closeted pedophiles.

        1. 24 is “young”? That fact proves you’re a MILF fetishist.

  13. President Obama, just a few months late, will…

    All these headlines everywhere about the budget he is about to release and what it will contain.

    Let me know when he actually does it and people can see for themselves what’s in it.

    1. Let me know when he gets one out that Congress will even consider passing.

      1. Wake me up when they cut spending.

    2. We have to pass it to find out what’s in it.

    3. Just reading the headline made it seem bogus: the tax increases will be huge, entitlement cuts will be ten years in the future, Team Red will vote against it, & Obama will accuse them of being unwilling to compromise.

    4. But there is good economic news:


      1. hmm. Fewer people working and paying taxes. More people receiving assistance…that should fix the deficit real good!

        1. Fix it like I fixed my dog!

  14. Kim Basinger’s daughter in various bikinis.
    Not the greatest way to launch a modeling career.

    1. Looks like they could not afford a professional photographer, makeup artist or wardrobe. Maybe they spent all the money on renting the yacht.

      1. Or a gym membership with a decent personal trainer and dietician.

    2. Wow is she an amazon next to her mother in that pic.

      1. Well, if she got Alec’s genes, she’s going to turn into a blimp at 35, so she better get herself as famous as possible by then.

        1. She is either really tall or her mother is really short.

          1. She’s 6’2″.

            1. Nice long legs.

    3. Is this the girl that Arec Bardwin was screaming at like a madman in that voicemail message that made the news a few years back?

    4. She should get that knee looked at. That’s some interesting bruising.

  15. Ohio courts still routinely jail people who fail to pay fines and fees, even though that was long ago ruled illegal.

    Supreme Court rulings were never meant to apply in cases where state coffers are concerned. (Never mind it costs more to incarcerate than the fines that aren’t collected.)

  16. http://yidwithlid.blogspot.com…..ds-of.html
    FDR’s antisemitism doomed thousands to die in the Holocaust. It must never be forgotten what a horrible person he was.

    1. He was just following the racist progressive playbook. It wasn’t really his fault – he was just too doltish to see Margaret Sanger for what she really was.

    2. Not to mention his sycophancy to Joseph Stalin. The U.S. diplomatic mission in the Soviet Union first refused to believe that mass killings were taking place, and then just shrugged it off, leaving American citizens there to their fate. Read The Forsaken if you want more reason to hate that authoritarian piece of shit.

    3. Not the responsibility of the United States.

      1. “leaving American citizens there to their fate”

        Um, what?

          1. I was more responding to Chris Mallory saying that US citizens are not the responsibility of the United States.

            1. Chris Mallory is just worried that the US government might take an interest into his daughter, whom Chris Mallory molests daily.

              1. I thought he was too busy exposing the Lizard People – Joooooo conspiracy to do anything like that?

    4. I don’t need an example of antisemitism to hate that marxist-sympathizing, concentration camp-building shitbird.

    5. “He could have pressed the British to open Palestine’s doors to Jewish refugees. He could have authorized the use of empty troop-supply ships to bring refugees to stay in the U.S. temporarily, until the end of the war. He could have permitted refugees to stay as tourists in a U.S. territory, such as the Virgin Islands, until it was safe for them to return to Europe.”

      But he *did* give false passports to let Jews escape the National Socialists, and he let Jews shelter in churches, monasteries, convents, and other buildings.

      Wait, that was Pius XII.

      1. And Oskar Schindler, and Chiune Sugihara….

        Seriously, when you’re outdone by folks on the other side….

  17. http://www.nationalreview.com/…..ew-johnson

    The guy who signed the evil, anti gay laws of DOMA and DADT is being honored by GLAAD.

    1. Well he had a D after his name. That’s the same way as GLAA. He’s the same as them.

    2. Question. Why should Republicans who are otherwise receptive to gay issues but really don’t feel strongly about it give a shit? GLAAD makes it pretty clear when they do things like this all they really care about are liberal politics not civil rights. They really do themselves a lot of harm.

  18. “Ohio courts still routinely jail people who fail to pay fines and fees, even though that was long ago ruled illegal.”

    Michigan laughs?

  19. Gerard Depardieu is making a film about disgraced ex-IMF chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn. If only Roman Polanski were directing it – we could have a rapist trifecta

    1. Depardieu is rape-y?

      Rape-rape or just rape?

      1. Well, he is French.

      2. He has been quoted as admitting to participating in gang rape as a youngster, and also wondering why rape is seen as bad in the US. He has also claimed to have been misquoted / mistranslated, after these quotes attracted some opprobrium.

    2. Strauss-Kahn was set up.

      1. Someone set us up the rape!

      2. “Zee beech set me up!”


  20. South GA only 50 years behind.

    Posed in honor of the roommate who grew up in an adjoining county.

    So a biracial group of four best friends who attend Wilcox County High School have set out to change history, raising money to host an integrated prom in the town of nearly 1,200 people, about 51 percent of them white, 46 percent black, according to census figures.

    1. The district hasn’t paid for a prom in 30 years, leaving the planning up to student groups that are free to organize them as they wish, Wilcox County Schools Superintendent Steve Smith told ABC News.

      So these proms are in fact privately organized dances attended by high school students. It’s not a case of segregated proms, any more then the fact that my post prom party was all white people makes that a segregated post prom party.

      1. Did I say it was or should be illegal? No. I’m just saying that after 50 years of having no excuse for picking your friends based on skin color, maybe it should be okay if your black friends come to your white dance and vice versa.

        1. Uh, I’m not seeing any evidence that there is some kind of rule prohibiting it. The only thing in the article is speculation from a teenage girl:

          Senior Keela Bloodworth, another organizer of the integrated prom effort who’s white, said her black friends wouldn’t dare come to the other dance.
          “They would probably have the police come out there and escort them off the premises,” Bloodworth told WGXA.

          What I think is happening is the same thing that happens all over the freaking country, but no one calls it segregation: people, in general, prefer to associate with people that are like themselves.

          1. people, in general, prefer to associate with people that are like themselves.

            If you’re talking about mere physical appearance as opposed to, say, culture, then you’re wrong.

            1. Culture of course.

          2. What I think is happening is the same thing that happens all over the freaking country, but no one calls it segregation: people, in general, prefer to associate with people that are like themselves.

            Ethnic chauvinism is considered a-okay if non-white people are practicing it, because CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE BIGOT.

            1. RRR, in this case, I’ve read that the black prom has let white and Hispanic students go to it (though only a few do) the last few years, but the white prom hasn’t allowed any minorities.

          3. When year after year, you have two proms (privately held or not), one that just happens to have all the white students at the school, and one for all the black students, I think there’s probably something else at play. ANd how many public schools don’t have proms? Don’t be obtuse. And I’ve read that a biracial student was escorted off the premises of the white prom last year. This is pretty much the exact same situation as the documentary “Prom Night in Mississippi.” Watch the film and tell me race had nothing to do with it

  21. I am a weenie living in MD. I think I have finally reached the point where I can no longer live in the state.

    I hate cold weather. Is Texas my only hope?

    1. How cold is Kentucky in the winter? My own dreams of moving to Colorado have been shattered – now thinking Utah.

      1. Depends where in the state you are. But for the most part we run 30s to low 40s with the occasional blasts of Arctic air from Canada.

        1. Too cold for me then.

          1. KY == MD weather wise.

            You all got way more snow the last few years.

            1. The big difference is if you have allergies, KY will kill you dead.

              Note: This applies to me.

              1. Allergy slain – Undead robc roams the hills of Kentucky?

                1. In the spring, and especially the fall, and generally for most of the summer, I absolutely feel that way.

                  1. I take Zyrtec from now until the next freeze, and wear a dust mask every time I mow the lawn or do anything else outside that kicks up dust.

                    KY is rough on allergies, but I haven’t had to shovel my drive-way in GT 2 years

    2. You could move south of the Potomac. I think we have another ten years or so before the flood of statist fucks in NoVA are able to vote themselves control of my beloved commonwealth.

      1. I am losing hope about Virginia. Maryland is going to do to it what New York did to New Jersey. At this point they should grant DC statehood on the condition that they incorporate Arlington and Fairfax Counties with it, giving the rest of Virginia some hope.

        1. I am with John. I considered VA, but I think I will be unhappy again in less than 10 years.

        2. It’s basically over. There are some holdouts but its not looking good.

          And it happened it less than 20 years.

          But my gadesen flies behind the lines.

        3. Yeah, you know things are going pretty badly whenever a republican governor agrees to raise taxes.

          1. We’re still very business friendly, gun laws are good and getting better, and in general things are decent.

            The Democrats are still pretending to be business friendly moderates who love guns. When they stop pretending, and openly campaign for socialism, that’s when it’s over.

            1. Basically when Alexandria and Arlington local pols decide to go statewide.

    3. They’re always looking for men in Carrizo Springs.

  22. Scott Brown may run for office again, but this time from New Hampshire.

    As a Democrat?

        1. Strong in the ways of the force are you.

    1. Another Masshole pollutes the Granite State.

  23. ‘Entitled’ high school senior sparks a firestorm of anger after she writes a scathing open letter to the Ivy League schools that rejected her


    ‘For starters, had I known two years ago what I know now, I would have gladly worn a headdress to school. Show me to any closet, and I would’ve happily come out of it. I offer about as much diversity as a saltine cracker.’

    This of course sparks comments like

    “Your letter reveals your republican homophobic leanings and hatred of others not exactly like you. Grow up.”

    Everything is about TEAM.

    1. That’s not the kind of diversity we want at our institution!

    2. Her essay is hysterical. And absolutely spot on. Basically, she says she wasted her time doing things like studying and learning when what she should have been doing was figuring out a way to be a gay Native American transsexual or spending money to do useless feel good charity work in some looked down upon country.

    3. Meh. Entitled is right.

      Get turned down by one University: maybe it’s an affirmative action problem.

      Get turned down by every University: maybe there’s something else going on.

      1. Yeah, that GPA and SAT is actually marginal for those schools without a booster of some kind.

        In other words, she has it exactly right: if she’d been gay or been nonwhite, she would have gotten in.

      2. “Entitled” is very gentle to describe a person who goes on national TV to complain about not getting into her target schools.

    4. I heard a coworker talking about that in the gym this morning. I’ll have to check out the editoral.

      In my personal experience at an Ivy, I found that despite being a white male I brought a lot more diversity (of views) to the school than the far majority of the minorities that were there. For starters, I had worked throughout high school and undergrad, my parents didn’t go to college, and I was actually told “No, we can’t afford that” while growing up.

      1. Having read her article, that was actually a pretty shitty write up. With her scores and grades she could have a good case, but she didn’t present it well with that writing.

        On the other hand, she’s a redhead so I’m going to agree with her anyway.

        1. Why would you even want to go to a school that didn’t want you? Fuck ’em.

          1. My lily-white son of privilege got a full scholarship to a (public university) law school. So diversity isn’t everything. Fuck Princeton. Fuck Yale. Of course, his mother is one of them filthy mackerel-snapping bog-jumpers. So maybe he got bonus points for that.

          2. She’s getting bagged on for her writing style (which isn’t bad, but not good either), but the most glaring idiocy I noticed about her is her insatiable need for brand-name higher education.

            She seems like a hard worker and go getter, and will be enough of a bitch in the workforce to get exactly where she wants to go. Sorry for the detour through Duke, but you’ll be just fine, honey.

            1. ^^THIS^^

              Instead of going into debt to get a degree decreasing value, she no doubt now will take a full scholarship somewhere and avoid debt altogether.

              She is looking at a better future than the black kids who got into Yale ahead of her. They are looking at a terrible job market and debts they are unlikely to ever pay back.

              1. There is one ivy, Princton I think, that has banned their students taking out student loans.

                If you qualify for a student loan, Princeton covers it as a grant instead.

            2. Maybe her essays just weren’t very good.

        2. I nearly blew off the article till you mentioned she was a soul thief

          1. She should go to a school in Boston. We’ve got plenty besides Harvard.

            1. Harvard? Why go to a liberal arts school?

              1. She was trying to get into Ivies.

      2. I found that despite being a white male I brought a lot more diversity (of views) to the school than the far majority of the minorities that were there. For starters, I had worked throughout high school and undergrad, my parents didn’t go to college, and I was actually told “No, we can’t afford that” while growing up.

        Oh, how I love trying to explain to people that this is the kind of diversity that actually matters.

        1. What value would having a kid from a farm add?

          1. Would probably know shit when she smelled it.

            1. I am a he, thank you.

    5. Kudos to her for acknowledging what most people won’t say: that the Ivy League is full of a bunch of PC-obssessed pozzed-out institutions where academic excellence became less important than filling in some stupid social justice quota.

      Thumbs down, however, for thinking hard work entitled her to get accepted. In all honesty, they may have done her a favor since she won’t have to take out a shitload of debt for a stupid degree.

  24. Missing hiker found.

    1. Her dad is rocking a sweet beard.

    2. These idiots managed to get lost on clearly marked trail, brought no water or even packs, have no memory of events, etc. Yup. Betting they went out there, popped a couple of mushrooms or tabs for a “mountain high”, things got weird from there.

      1. Or they went of the trail to look for a nice place to make out.

        That’s what I did when I took my now ex-GF hiking.

        1. I took my now ex-GF hiking

          And you murdered her?!?!?!

      2. Yeah I remember a dayhike where the girl I was with made fun of my daypack stuffed with supplies. Until all of a sudden it got 20 degrees cooler and the fleeces and hats I packed, along with the Esbit stove, extra water, and hot cocoa packets came out.

        1. YOu might have fared better without the stove, forcing you to find more creative ways to stay warm.

  25. 17yr old kid builds DNA testing machine in his bedroom to learn why his brother is ginger.

    1. Was Mom a whore?

    2. mom has some explaining to do about that girls weekend from 17 years ago?

    3. One of the most hysterically funny moments of my time as a parent was the incident at the Boston Museum of Science when my then six-year-old daughter gravely asked the staff if she could take a dead bug home from the butterfly garden since “my brother is trying to build a DNA changer, and my dad won’t let him experiment on human bodies.”

      She is right, I’m kind of old fashioned that way. πŸ™‚

      1. I really like MOS, partially for the IMAX showings. It makes for a really good date spot, particularly since I get in free because of work.

      2. That is a museum award winner. Could you please describe the look on the docent’s face?

      3. That is a museum award winner. Could you please describe the look on the docent’s face?

        1. Twice, please.

        2. Ha!

          The staff members turned and looked at me with horror in their eyes, like I was the villain from the movie The ‘Burbs.

          Of course, I was cracking up, and I said something to the effect of “yes, that’s one of the unspoken rules of our household. I don’t allow animal experimentation either.”

          One of the staff members was this pretty eastern european girl (polish I think) and she started chuckling. At this point my daughter started babbling in an effort to change the subject, and everyone started cracking up.

          To this day the polish girl recognizes me and smiles.

    4. Goddamn the Brits do hate gingers. Frankly, looking at the kid, he could pass. No apparent freckles so a little hair dye and he could totally pass for normal, as long as he could fake a soul, of course.

      1. Maybe he could earn a living as a Carrot Top impersonator?

        1. He’s going to have to overdo it working the upper body at the gym first.

          1. OK, maybe a Yahoo Serious impersonator then?

  26. New WRX for the Suby owners here:

    1. That’s a sweet looking car right there.

    2. You have to hand it to Suburu. They really know how to pick a market and cater to it. They totally dominate the brain NPR listener and Yobbo markets.

      1. And the “I’ve got to drive 100 miles a day in the snow and don’t like to spend a ton of money on gas” market as well.

        Oh, and fuck off.

        1. I didn’t say they made bad cars. I said they really know how to pic their market.

        2. A forrester might as well be called an “Obamavoter mobile” and an Impreza might as well be called a “Yabomobile”

          1. What on Earth is a Yobbo or a Yabo?

            1. It is a British slang term for a young drunken man. Think about the Brits you see throwing up in alleys on bachelor weekends in Prague.

              1. So young drunken British men are likely to be driving Imprezas? Huh, you sure have a fucked up view of the world.

                1. So young drunken British men are likely to be driving Imprezas? Huh, you sure have a fucked up view of the world.

                  That or perhaps you have never watched any British car shows where Imprezas are referred to as just that or have never bothered to notice the street racer culture in either the US or Britain where Imprezas are ubiquitous for good reason since they are very fast and very cheap.

                  You really don’t get out much do you Sparky?

                  1. You really don’t get out much do you Sparky?

                    As a general rule, I don’t collectivize people. I understand that that’s beyond your ability though. Don’t get your panties in a twist.

                2. He just likes to have people to look down upon and mock. Kinda like the average liberal. I don’t call him Red Tony for nothing.

                  1. Yeah sarcasmic you never mock anyone, just fat women, liberals, and cops.

                    1. I don’t mock fat women. I mock you for chasing them.

                    2. So I can’t mock you driving a Subaru?

                    3. So I can’t mock you driving a Subaru?

                      So I can’t mock your fucked up worldview?

                    4. So it is a fucked up world view to point out that street racers and young men like to drive Imprezas? I am not sure I am the one with the fucked up world view here.

                    5. You can try to mock me for driving a practical car, but it will only make you look like an ass. Not that that ever stops you.

                    6. Didn’t say it wasn’t practical. It just comes with a COEXIST and ENDLESS/THIS WAR bumper stickers standard.

                    7. The only sticker mine came with said JOHN CHASES CHUBBIES.

                3. They’ve mentioned the yobbo/ Impreza connection on Top Gear several times in the past. And Like John said, Imprezas, especially the WRX and STi are pretty common amongst the tuner crowd here in the states. The WRX a little more so thean the STi due to its cheaper upfront cost, although the STi does offer a lot more performance “out of the box”, so you don’t have to spend as much on performance upgrades. In the end it’s probably a wash.

                  Full disclosure: I own a 2004 STi, though I don’t consider a tuner or a yobbo.

                  1. Loki,

                    Imprezas are probably the most horsepower and performance for the dollar you can get.

                    1. Yep. Lancer Evo’s used to be as well prior to ~2006/ 2007 or so when they exploded in popularity and the price went up. And prior to the EVO X, when Mitubishi decided to add more gadgets/ gizmos and creature comforts to aim for a more upscale market.

              2. not quite. You can be sober and a yob (yobbo is a variant). Yobs are uncouth, thuggish, not very bright, males, usually young.

                1. True IFH. Drunken Yob is not a redundancy.

          2. I don’t fit either one of those labels.

      2. Subaru is getting way too fancy. I’ve driven Subarus for a long time. They’ve always been in the mid-price range, but they used to just make good, basic cars without a bunch of bullshit. Now they seem to be trying to get all fancy and luxurious (plus that stupid fucking “Love” campaign). And they totally fucked up the AWD. My previous car was a 92 Legacy and I could not get it stuck in the snow if I tried, even without snow tires. My current 2007 Impreza has all kinds of fancy traction control that you can’t turn off and it is really not great at low speed in the snow. And the ABS is also terrible in the snow. Unless I can find a really good older one, this might be my last Subaru.

        1. Hmm. I have a 2012 Legacy (wanted a WRX real bad but I don’t do stick, stupid in city traffic) and snow performance is amazing. Given, my last car was a serious POS so I may just be thinking of it as a huge improvement, but I dunno. Legacy is pretty fucking awesome for snow.

          1. The newer one is still very good in the snow. The only thing that slows me down significantly is other drivers.

            But with my old car, I could literally drive into a foot of snow, park, go do something for an hour and drive right out. The new car, not so much. Sometimes it pays to keep it simple. I like the newer car a lot, but I’d trade it for a ’92 legacy with similar mileage in good condition (if such a thing still exists) in a minute.

            1. Maybe they had a few bad years and you managed to get one. Sometimes happens when a company switches designs and it takes a few years to work out the kinks.

    3. Beautiful. But 20″ wheels?

      1. Because they’re not building them for rallies anymore? Maybe?

        1. It’s a show car. The car that will actually come out will look a lot like this but not exactly. A lot of impractical stuff tends to get cleaned out in production.

          I’d expect 17-18″ wheels.

    4. Keep in mind it’s just a concept, so it’s more of a “this is the general direction we’re thinking of going” kind of thing. The 20 inch wheels probably won’t make it onto the final production model.

      Overall, Looks pretty good to me. I guess this means the WRX/ STi will be it’s own model line as opposed to a suped up Impreza. I’ll be curious to see what the price point will be. The nice thing about basing it on the vanilla unimpressive Impreza is that it helped keep costs down. If I had to hazard a guess, I’d guess mid $30,000 for the WRX (which is about where the STi is now), and low to mid $40,000 for STi. Especially now that they have the BRZ for more budget consious buyers. I hope I’m wrong. I wouldn’t want to spend that kind of money unless it’s considerably faster/ better handling than the current car.

      1. It would be nice if the price came down, not that I’d still be able to afford one probably. If they’re not building to rally specs anymore I think there’s a chance though.

      2. Now that I’ve watched the video in the link, they do mention that it’s still built on the Impreza platform, it just gets its own line. Which will likely mean that although it won’t share quite as many parts in common with the Impreza, at least they didn’t have to develop an entirely new platform for it. I think my price guesstimate is probably still somewhat valid though, given the presence of the BRZ at around the old WRX’s price point (high $20,000). I doubt Subaru will want to have 2 competing cars in the performance category at the same price range.

        1. It’s just a freaking 2nd GEN eclipse GSX. Holy 1995 batman.

    5. Has anyone driven the BRZ yet?

      1. I haven’t driven one, but I want to. I’ve read quite a few reviews in car magazines and the general consensus is it handles extremely well, some have even called it a “hard top Miata”, or what a hard top Miata would be like if Mazda had ever built one. But, 200 hp is not enough. It’s 0-60 time is somewhere in high 6 – low 7 second range, which isn’t that good for a modern sports car. Also Top Gear tested it on their track earlier this season and it only did 1:31.something time, IIRC.

  27. Trigger-happy Chicago cop gets suspended or a whole day without pay for firing into an apartment building while trying to kill a pair of dogs.

    He had been reprimanded before for “accidentally” shooting at a suicidal man.

    1. He had been reprimanded before for “accidentally” shooting at a suicidal man.

      The guy obviously wanted it.

  28. Just read Healy’s review of Coolidge in the magazine (well, my Kindle).

    The notion that we should only have Presidents too depressed to get out of bed in the morning sounds pretty great.

  29. A female member of the NSW Mounted Police Force is allegedly the mystery passenger on board a forklift in a late night drunken rampage at Australia?’s agricultural showcase, the Sydney Royal Easter Show.


    1. Aww, y’all are just funny talking rednecks at heart.

  30. This should warm even the cold cockles of the libertarian heart. Exonerated man gets pro-football contract.

    In 2002, Banks was accused by a friend of rape and kidnapping. After waiting a year to stand trial and despite a lack of DNA evidence, he pleaded no contest in order to avoid a possible 41-year sentence. The plea deal resulted in five years behind bars.

    After he was released from jail in 2007 at the age of 22, he was placed on probation. The restrictions outlined that he had to register as a sex offender, could not live within 2,000 feet from any school or park, and he had to keep a GPS device around his ankle to ensure that he did not leave the state.

    One day, he received a friend request on Facebook from the woman who had started it all.

    “She was hoping that we could allow bygones to be bygones,” Banks told “60 Minutes.”

    Upon meeting with her twice, he and a private detective were able to tape a retraction in which she stated, “No, he did not rape me.”

    On May 24, 2012, he was exonerated by the same judge who put him behind bars nine years earlier.

    Fucking bitch.

    1. Women never lie about rape for their own purposes.

      1. Never, and to even joke about it is TEH PATRIARCHY!

    2. he pleaded no contest in order to avoid a possible 41-year sentence

      Why is no one talking about this part of this outrage?

      1. Oh, I’m pretty angry all around.

        1. she was a kid when she made the accusation, and says it got out of hand when adults got involved. Which sounds plausible – traditional adult meddling in adolescent sexual experimentation combined with prosecutorial assholery could well back a teenager into a corner.

          Not defending her choice as an adult not to recant, and she should face charges.

          1. No. In this case I think his lawyer should pay him restitution for telling him to take a plea when he was innocent.

            1. He probably had the PD, you know, the Penitentiary Direct… er, Public Defender.

    3. The lying bitch should have to spend five years in jail, equal to what the falsely-accused had to spend.

      1. That would be nice, but I am worried the next one will just keep lying.

        Actually I think if I was President I’d give a nationwide amnesty to anyone who wanted to retract false accusations. I think the flood of people released from prison would open some eyes.

        1. But there was an actual penalty attached to a false accusation, it would probably make them far less likely. You tend to get less of what you punish.

          1. Eh, but once you’ve put someone in jail, then the tendency is going to be to keep the lie going, because it’s too late to retract your statement.

            This bitch got a 1.5 million dollar settlement, and explicitly feared having to give the money back. Incentives matter.

          2. So you combine the two.

            Pass a law, any false accusations recanted before X date are pardoned automatically, any made or discovered after that date will result in a minimum jail term of twice what the falsely accused served.

            1. But if that were the case this guy would still be in jail.

              It’s more important to get innocent people out of prison then it is to punish the guilty.

  31. So in 2010 Barack Obama low year for spending, the Federal Government spent more money than George Bush in his first year and Bill Clinton in his third year COMBINED.



  32. Reforming wildly underfunded public pensions may be beyond the ability or interest of most state lawmakers, but Puerto Rico’s legislators voted to do just that.

    Second best reason they shouldn’t become a state. It would only corrupt their innocence.

  33. US Navy continues to promote the like that the USS Thresher sank during dive testing and not because it violated the Benthic Treaty with the Deep Ones.

    1. No, Ulmo was pissed off at the arrogance of the captain.

    2. I thought it sank due to a possible hot-running torpedo. Or was that Scorpion?

      1. FTA: Minutes later, the crew of a rescue ship made out the ominous words “exceeding test depth” and listened as the sub disintegrated under the crushing pressure of the sea. Just like that, the Thresher was gone, along with 129 men.

        Some submariners are baffled by the initial message about a minor difficulty because it’s believed a brazed joint on an interior pipe had burst ? a problem anything but minor.

        The Navy believes sea water sprayed onto an electrical panel, shorting it out and causing an emergency shutdown of the nuclear reactor.

        Holy shit.

        1. Here’s the straight dope with the Thresher.

          1) They were coming out of a shipyard and had had some of the seawater piping (presumably used in the condenser for their main engine) replaced.

          2) They were undergoing sea trials and slowly taking the sub deeper and deeper to validate that the boat was ready to return to operational status.

          3) One of the welds failed at a pretty significant depth leaving a one inch hole. Because they were so deep, this was catastrophic, the high pressure outside the hull was ramming water into the sub at a very high rate.

          4) The crew immediately took action for an emergency surfacing, presumably answering an ahead full bell, emergency blow of the ballast tanks, and up angle on the dive planes.

          5) The emergency blow failed: the air in the compressed air supply was moist, and as it flowed into the ballast tanks, the expanding volume caused the air to cool rapidly and the moisture formed ice which clogged the outlet reducing air flow into the ballast tanks to a fraction of what was required.

          6) The sea water flooding shorted out the Reactor Control System’s electrical power supply, triggering a SCRAM (emergency shutdown) of the reactor.

          6) Upon detecting the SCRAM, the control system for the main steam valves shut the valves. In ordinary circumstances, this would enable a faster restart of the reactor. This was the final nail in the coffin of the boat. They lost all propulsion.

          They got within 20 feet of the surface. Then slowly sank.

          1. It’s always a combination of low probability events. Don’t they have rocket fuel in the ballast tanks now for emergency blow?

            1. No. Really dry air. πŸ™‚

              1. Ah non Clancy techno thrillers…why is the cool stuff always the made up stuff.

              2. Yes, it’s all coming back to me now. I’ve read the reports on both Scorpion and Thresher and was conflating the two. One of the theories about Scorpion was that a failed metal foil membrane in one of the torpedoes caused its battery to activate and start the propulsion motor running in the torpedo room. The sub appears to have made some reversing maneuvers in an attempt to disarm the torpedo using its inertial disarming mechanism (if the torp reversed direction on its source too early it would disarm to avoid damaging its own boat). This eas ultimately unsuccessful, resulting in a explosion in the forward torpodo room, which is backed up by the fact that most of Scorpion’s hull was imploded except for the forward compartments , which were open to the sea as she sank.

                1. Quick question… was there a Russian sub nearby? Or was that just a rumor that had no basis in fact?

                  1. Pretty sure it was a rumor. There are photos publicly available of the hull of Scorpion but not of any possible neighbors.

          2. 20 feet of the surface. Damn.

          3. Um, this seems like a pretty dumbass thing to do.

            Why the hell would you be testing the seaworthness of a Sub in a place where the water is actually deep enough to cause the damn thing to implode, why not go to someplace that is 50 feet deeper than the damn things operational depth so that if something does go wrong there is at least a theoretical chance of rescue/recovery.

      2. Thresher had a bad weld in its seawater piping fail. And, it was in Gertrude comms with a surface ship right until it imploded.

        The Scorpion is that went missing and was found by Ballard on the bottom with a hole in its side. I’ve heard rumors that there is a Soviet sub nearby also with a hole in its side, and that the Navy sonar surveillance of the Atlantic only picked up one event of a submarine sinking in the distance, which implies the two subs – for whatever reason – sank each other.

        Of course, that’s just a rumor.

        1. This is why in the submarine fleet, they are hypersensitive to the quality of their compressed air, anal about checking welds, and the main steam valves are no longer shutdown automatically on a reactor scram.

          1. Does the Navy screen its submarine officers for OCD?

            1. Yes, it prefers they have it.

            2. Oh hell yes. OCD is a career booster in the sub fleet. Rickover was a cast iron prick, and he created the officer culture. Which is all to the good of course. There’s no room for “good enough” when you’re 400 feet underwater in a steel tube with a nuclear reactor.

              1. One of my favorite Rickover stories is of his dinner interviews of prospective nuke sub CO’s:

                If the interviewee seasoned his food with salt or pepper prior to tasting it, it was an automatic down-check.

    3. R’leyh needz moar subz!

      1. HA! It’s not the sub ole Cthulhu was after. Note, it was a nuclear powered sub.

  34. Scott Brown may run for office again, but this time from New Hampshire. Well, he wouldn’t be the first Bay Stater to head north.

    For some reason I thought there was a requirement to be a resident of a state for so many years before getting in Congress from there. I guess I was combining the citizen for X years +current resident requirements in my mind.

    1. Hilary Clinton ran for senate in New York, despite never having lived there.

      1. I knew she was a carpet bagger, I just thought she had lives there for a couple of years first.

  35. You see what happens when you use crazy bamboo scaffolding and don’t follow government regulations?

    A building being constructed illegally in a suburb of India’s financial capital collapsed into a mound of steel and concrete, killing at least 41 people and injuring more than 50 others, authorities said Friday.

    The building in the Mumbai suburb of Thane caved in Thursday evening, police said. Rescue workers with sledgehammers, gasoline-powered saws and hydraulic jacks were struggling to break through the tower of rubble in their search for possible survivors. Six bulldozers were brought to the scene.

    1. Actually Hong Kong was built, and continues to be built, with bamboo scaffolding. It works pretty well.

      1. You know this is the argument that’s going to be used.

  36. The vote on the [Maryland gun] bill broke down most starkly along geographical lines, with every lawmaker present from Montgomery, Prince George’s and Baltimore voting for it; almost every delegate from the western, eastern and southern parts of Maryland opposed it.

    Serious question for the lawyers: Any chance of legislation being developed/applied at the *county* level? If the fuckers good people in the urban areas don’t want guns, let the restrictions apply only to them.

    1. I’d be curious to see how many homicides in Baltimore are committed with legally owned guns.

      I’ve been in the jury pool for two homicides in Baltimore (thankfully wasn’t picked either time) and both times there were associated gun possession charges.

      Anecdotal, but I’d have to imagine this is more common than not.

  37. South Bend, Indiana police checklist:
    Enter house without a warrant…check
    Taze sleeping child and punch him in the face…check
    Cuff him and throw him in cruiser for no reason…check
    Leave tazer probes in for hours…check

    These are the same officers that got a mentally disabled person to eat a spoonful of cinnamon and throw up all over the place. Classy officers they have there in the heartland.

    1. Um, it’s South Bend, IN, home of the Notre Dame F***ing Irish. I don’t know if it counts as the heartland any more than Madison WI or Columbus OH.

  38. There are few things more NSFW learning to play the drums properly.


    1. try again, with a better link?

      1. What the fuck is wrong with you?

        1. I *said* it was NSFW.

          1. So if Hitler had just come out and said, “I told you people I was gassing millions of Jews to death,” it would have made it alright? I don’t fucking think so!

        2. Seconded.

          Paging Barfman, Barfman, come in please.

        3. What is it? I’m afraid to click now.

      2. if you can’t live down drummer jokes, embrace them

      3. dunno, sounds like he’s a beat off to me.

        1. *Slowly turns and stares*

  39. http://pjmedia.com/blog/gun-gr…..st-gambit/

    Mandatory insurance and registration followed by confiscation. They are so pathetically transparent.

    1. The penaltax looms large. Remember when as long you weren’t hurting or endangering anyone else you could do whatever you wanted, own whatever you wanted, and generally ne left the fuck alone? Me neither.

  40. Apparently, a Miami University student’s life is worth $750,000. At least that’s what the settlement was for the cops tazing him to death. None of those officers faced censure, by the way.

    And in other Ohio news, another civil case will move forward whare Mason cops tazered a guy that died from a skull fracture after he collapsed from the tazing. None of those cops were held accountable either.

    FTA (emphasis mine): “As I see it, one significant risk is that if you call into question an officers’ perceived legitimate use of a Taser, which had an unintended consequence, you risk having departments withdraw the tool in its entirety because the risk of significant liability for unintended consequences is simply too great,” he said.

    Straight out of the UOF Excuses Handbook the union must hand out upon graduation from the academy.

    1. If you hold them accountable for the damage the thing does, it means they might stop using it. Words really do fail.

      1. Heaven forbid they only use force when they are sure the possible consequences are worth it.

        1. Officer safety is more important than your safety.

    2. Foreseeable consequences are not unintended.

      Isn’t there a Vanadous Law about that or something?

      1. The new rule is:

        There is no such thing as unintended consequences.

    3. For a second I thought we were talking about a UM student, in which case they were overpaying.

      1. Miami was a University before Florida was a state.

        1. UM has a lot to be ashamed of, but at least Ben Roethelspberger isn’t one of them.

  41. Bush’s Economic Policies Bankrupted U.S., Reagan Budget Director Says

    “The destruction of fiscal rectitude under Ronald Reagan?one reason I resigned as his budget chief in 1985?was the greatest of his many dramatic acts,” Stockman writes. “It created a template for the Republicans’ utter abandonment of the balanced-budget policies of Calvin Coolidge and allowed George W. Bush to dive into the deep end, bankrupting the nation through two misbegotten and unfinanced wars, a giant expansion of Medicare and a tax-cutting spree for the wealthy that turned K Street lobbyists into the de facto office of national tax policy. In effect, the G.O.P. embraced Keynesianism?for the wealthy.”


    1. And so you think Stockman is right when he says Eisenhower was the best President of the 20th Century and FDR and pretty much every other liberal President was a disaster?

      You do understand that Stockman rejects every single bit of the Keynesian crony capitalism you hold dear and that Obama practices with abandon?

      No you don’t because you are a retarded waste of humanity.

      1. Jesus Christ, John, really? After that jobs print this morning Shreekey’s post proves it has less than zero credibility and craves nothing more than responses.

        Just. Stop.

        1. Sorry. I fell off the wagon. He is just so fucking stupid.

      2. “I have just one purpose … and that is to build up a strong progressive Republican Party in this country. If the right wing wants a fight, they are going to get it … before I end up, either this Republican Party will reflect progressivism or I won’t be with them anymore.”

        Eisenhower after being called a “commie” by the Birchers.

        1. Except no one here is a Bircher, you retarded little fuck.

          1. Stop it!

          2. John,

            You’re only encouraging the wretch!

            Please for the love of all that is holy can you please stop!

            Argue with Tulpa or something!

            1. It’s OK if John does it, it’s just not OK for us to do it.

    2. Re: Palin’s Buttwipe,

      Bush’s Economic Policies Bankrupted U.S., Reagan Budget Director Says

      He also called Ben Bernanke the most dangerous man who ever sat in the Fed’s chair. He also pretty much said that we’re in a Depression right now, no reason to beat around the bush, or the Bush.

      1. It knows that! Stop feeding it!

    3. GW Bush was a fiscal idiot. Is this new news?

      1. As I recall from the fighting at the time, Reagan may have known full well what he was doing as well. Bankrupting the government as fast as possible was not necessarily an unintended consequence. Stockman, as I recall, argued that being fiscally irresponsible was, well, fiscally irresponsible. Stockman favored a pay-as-you-go approach – which theoretically meant either raising taxes or cutting spending, but we all know there is no such thing as cutting spending.

        In terms of spendaholism, Stockman favored maybe cutting back on the drinking a little bit, Reagan said screw that, let’s get wasted and drive into a tree at 110 mph. We’ll see which approach ultimately gets government to stop spending – fiscal restraint or bankruptcy.

  42. PA officer under federal investigation for excessive force charged with “harassment” in separate case. The alleged “harassment” involves hitting someone in the head. Funny, I always thought that was assault and battery.

    He’s currently on a sweet-ass paid vacation compliments of the Wilkes-Barre taxpayers.

  43. you risk having departments withdraw the tool in its entirety because the risk of significant liability for unintended consequences is simply too great

    Oh, the horror. What next, expecting the cops to NOT viciously attack anyone who annoys them?

  44. Intestinal obstruction awakes.

  45. NPR doubles down:

    Sequester Scorecard: A Month Later, Effects Still up in the Air

    Automatic federal budget cuts that kicked in March 1 have had little initial impact in many parts of the government. For a few programs, however, the effect has been real and painful, as the government begins cutting $85 billion from its spending through the end of September.

    Many of the earliest signs of the cuts are being seen on the local level, in state programs like education that rely in part on federal dollars….

    A half-dozen NPR reporters spoke to Morning Edition about what they’re seeing so far in the areas they cover. Here’s a look at some things we do know, a month into sequestration:….

    1. I had to turn the radio off this morning when this one came on. Ugh.

  46. Fitness guru Jennifer Nicole Lee in a bikini – and eating a banana.
    I’ll be in my bunk

    1. Why. The. Fuck. do women do that with their lips?

      1. If you are referring to the poor choice of lipstick, I think I could easily overlook that if the lips are wrapped around my schwanz.

        1. Duck lips.

      2. The shade matches her bikini. Not defending it, but that’s the way women think.

  47. Two words.
    Jessica. Alba.
    I’ll be in my bunk longer today.

    1. Don’t tell Counterfly – she’s 31, therefore dried up and wizened. πŸ™‚

      1. 31. She’s demanding sex constantly.
        Back to my bunk.

    2. I’ll be in my bunk longer today.

      So you’re saying she’s not doing it for you?

      1. Few things can keep me going for a double shot these days, and it takes some time…

    3. Way too skinny for John.

  48. Police officer sets his own house on fire with wife and daughter inside. Charged with one count of arson.

    But there’s no double standard.

    1. See this one in the same paper?


      Deputies say Tori Wheeler, 18, told boyfriend Derek Bauer she was pregnant as a joke. Deputies say she told them he got very angry, so as part of the joke, she pulled out a knife to threaten him. But deputies say when Bauer threatened to call the police, she lost her temper and cut Bauer’s throat.

      1. Crazy eyes.

        1. Real crazy.

        2. That is some deep down crazy. The guy is lucky it surfaced now and in an unmistakable way.

      2. I’ll bet the crazy makeup sex will be epic enough to keep that dude around until she actually kills him.

        1. I bet they are back together the moment she makes bail. How do you sleep next to someone who once slit your throat?

          1. Naked after probing all of her orifices? Also, checking the bed, nightstand, and bathroom for weapons just before that.

      3. She’s got that Stuart Scott dead-eye thing going.

        And yeah, she looks like the kind of girl that would cut a man’s throat because he reacted poorly to her joke.

        1. She is not particularly attractive. But there is something about the crazy eyes that make her oddly compelling in the same way a deadly viper is.

      4. What the hell is wrong with people?

        Haven’t we all innocently and playfully “threatened” our significant others with a knife?

      5. dont stick it in crazy.

  49. Austin cop caught on camera roughing up woman will not be charged. The guy who took the pictures, however, could be facing a $500 fine for “failure to obey a lawful order”.

    The woman who was manhandled is facing up to a year in jail for the stand-alone charge of resisting arrest.

    Yeah, this all seems legit.

    1. I’d love to be on that jury. No, fuck you, telling a cop to go fuck himself when the cop is wrong is not a crime.

      1. I would acquit any charge of resisting arrest that wasn’t accompanied by an actual criminal charge.

    2. Free people do not have to take orders.

      So much for The Land of the Free.

  50. Also, this may be my last MLs for a while. I start a new job on Monday, and I don’t know what the policy on fucking off on the Internet until 10am is at the new place. They offered me an extra $100 a day, so I suppose it will be a fair trade if it takes me several months before I can worm my way back to the MLs through the firewall or remoting. Or I may be back on Tuesday (orientation in Tampa monday) like nothing ever happened.

    1. Good luck! I too hope for the day when I have a real job and no longer post on Reason to kill time.

      1. you have odd goals

        1. What’s odd about having a $15K/yr raise as a goal?

          1. It’s a little known fact that the more money you make the more time you have to sit around and post on Reason.

    2. We’ll keep your seat warm. Good luck.

    3. At my government job they are amazed that I come in on time and get right to work. Apparently most people drink coffee after arriving late and then fuck around until 1030 or so.

      1. Going to work for a private company that pays bonuses, presumably for performance. I assume this will be different from my government contracting jobs.

        1. Performance…what’s that?

          1. “You’ve never worked in the private sector! They expect results!”

      2. Then it’s almost time for lunch at 11:30, and you can’t get much done in an hour, so why start?

        1. You joke, but it was 4:30 at one point, and my boss asked me what I’d gotten done today. And he accepted “Oh this and that, a few things.” as an actual answer. Then he left early.

    4. make sure you wash, wear proper big boy pants, and play nice with the other kids πŸ™‚

    5. The first day of a new job should be just like the first day in prison. Pick out the biggest guy and beat him bloody with a folding chair. You got to establish your place in the hierarchy.

      1. Damn, why weren’t you around to give me that advice when I started at my present job!? I’d damn near be North America CEO for this outfit by now.

        1. I told my boss’ son that before his first day of kindergarten. She was was not amused.

          1. Why? Because you would have made him king of the school until puberty, if not all the way through high school?

            1. She thinks she has to disapprove of me when other people are around. We have a twisted relationship.

      2. It’s software development. I can accomplish the same effect by just maintaining solid eye-contact every time I speak to another developer for the first day.

        1. You monster. I bet you are also planning on not unambiguously stating your feelings from moment to moment as well.

          1. I plan on asking them “how do you feel about _____” things. I know this will make them uncomfortable because I spent the first 3 months of my current relationship training the gf (who is life coach for college freshmen) to ask me “what do you think about _____”, as I don’t perceive in feelings, for the most part and she found “I don’t know” an unresponsive answer.

            1. Life coach for college freshmen…. why didn’t I think of that job?

          2. …not unambiguously stating your feelings…

            So that would be what, ambiguously stating his feeling? Fucking double negatives.

        2. Shit, that’s the equivalent of carrying a SPAS-12 at the ready around any normal office.

    6. Congratulations and good luck!

  51. I’d love to be on that jury. No, fuck you, telling a cop to go fuck himself when the cop is wrong is not a crime.

    Unfortunately, I suspect the Court would disallow any testimony which might undermine the credibility of the officer; that is, anything which would expose him as the lying sack of shit he is.

  52. Canadian cop issues death threats while off duty. He has been released from jail and has been told to appear later. The story is no big deal, except for this gem FTA:

    The officer ? whose name and age is not being released by Hamilton police to protect the victim ? has been charged with one count of uttering death threats.

    Yes, let’s not release the name and age of the alleged perp to protect his victim. Like if the roles were reversed and some banger threatened to kill a cop, you can bet your ass the name of that guy would be withheld to protect his victim.

    1. Winnipeg cop charged in alleged car sales fraud

      Sierhuis has been with the Winnipeg Police Service for over 24 years and has been put on administrative leave pending a review of his employment status, according to police.

  53. I don’t know what the policy on fucking off on the Internet until 10am is at the new place.

    Just tell them you’re checking the Ag Dept crop reports.

  54. BLS numbers are quite meh. Jan and Feb were revised upward for a net of +61k over initial numbers but March’s initial has just 88k, about half the size of the increase in civilian non-institutional population.

    Year over year, we have 940k fewer unemployed, 1.2mm more employed, but 2.07mm more out of the labor force, keeping us roughly flat at 58.5% participation rate. U3 is down month over month and year over year, but it doesn’t seem to be because of a particularly strong recovery.

    1. 58.5% participation rate.

      That is the big number there. We have over 40% of the population not producing anything or if they are doing it in the underground economy. We are only as rich as the amount of things we produce. And having 40% of the population or somewhere near that not producing, is a problem.

      1. Do those numbers exclude children and retirees?

        1. They don’t. And that is why it will never be 100%. It also includes people in prison and hospitals and such as well. But that is still really low. Lowest since the 1960s I think. And when you consider that it is standard for women to work now, it is effectively much lower than the 60s and probably the lowest since the 30s.

          1. I was just curious about what that number reflected.

            I gotta tell you, my recession alarm is going off. Of course, a recession right now would just be more anemia–it’s not like this is the way things should be.

            1. I predicted a dodecadip recession back in 2008 when TARP passed.

              I turned my alarm to silent then, because it was just getting annoying. Ive seen nothing to suggest anything has changed.

              1. You were not alone in that. We saw this movie before in the 1990s in Japan. We had two choices, take a really deep recession and come out the other side in a couple of years and grow again, or avoid a really deep recession and have ten years or more of stagnation. We of course chose the second option because first would have required people to accept the consequences of their failures and we can’t have that.

                1. Yep. That was my exact argument with joe and others on here.

                  2 years of depression + strongth growth japan for the last 20 years.

                  1. insert many greater than signs at appropriate point.

                2. I was interviewed by the local news for a piece on student perspectives on TARP and the stimulus, where I said we’d be in recession or non-recovery growth for a decade. Apparently everyone else was excited about student loans or something?

          2. And looks like you kind of answered my question.

        2. For reference, during 01-08 we averaged upward of 64% participation rate. There shouldn’t be a 6 point drop in 5 years.

          1. Correction: I was conflating the LFPR with the listed participation on the BLS report, which is more accurately Employed as % of CNIP. That puts 2012 average LFP at 63.7% versus the 66.5% that prevailed from ’90-’08 (although 04-08 were already down to 66% or so)

        3. It excludes everyone under 16 but does not exclude retirees.

          If you excluded retirees it would be something like 67%

      2. Something I have no clue about:

        What was the participation rate back when Single Income Families with Mother Staying Home was more normal?

        1. http://data.bls.gov/pdq/SurveyOutputServlet

          In 1956 it was 60%. Now it is 58%. That is scary.

          1. You SFed the link.

            But yeah, that is scary. That was why I asked, I wondered how we compared to that era.

            1. Sorry. I can’t get it to work. But go to the BLS.gov site and you can do historical graphs on it. And it was 60% in 1956.

            2. There are 2.3mm fewer people employed now than in 2006, 5.5mm more unemployed than in 2006, and 9.6mm more who aren’t in the labor force. Boomer are retiring, so that’s throwing off the numbers obviously, but I feel as though we should find these numbers troubling anyway.

              1. Yes, but are Boomers retiring at the same age as earlier generations? It sounds like they aren’t.

        2. These are the worst participation rates in 30 years. So there’s that.


          1. Yeah, but everything is great!

    2. And these dismal numbers don’t even reflect the massive number of people who are now being shunted from full time to part time employees because of the Unaffordable Care Act.

      1. Yeah I always wonder if I count as two employed people, what with working 55 hours a week at two different jobs.

        1. In the Household figures you’d count as one person but on the Establishment figures you’d be two. You can reconcile the tables to estimate how much is second or third jobs, but that takes some time. There’s probably a more straightforward chart somewhere but the BLS site is a bit clunky.

          1. the BLS site is a bit clunky.

            Feature, not a bug. We wouldn’t want to have easily accessable data in a form that people can easily understand now would we? Then there would be no need for journalists official court scribes to tell people what to think and how to feel.

          2. The labor force participation rate tends to be the most straightforward since it measures the entire working-age population. One of the reasons it’s so low now is because of people working two or more jobs.

  55. UNEXPECTEDLY poor job numbers baffle newsreaders. Sequester to blame.


  56. President Obama, just a few months late, will unveil a budget including tax hikes (surprise!) and cuts to Medicare and Social Security.

    So much for bleeding-heart Democrat.

    And just yesterday I was listening to some pundit say that this is not the time to make budgetary cuts because “aggregate demand” and unicorns.

    1. And the multiplier effect.

  57. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..rning.html

    NORKS order all embassies evacuated.

    1. Oh boy, I can’t wait to see what thig big-mouthed, small-peckered pipsqueak is going to do.

      1. I don’t know what to think anymore. He clearly has a lot of problems. Either he really is insane or his military is about to do him in and he is doing everything he can think of to try and show them what a tough guy he is. At this point, I think in the next month or so something big is going to happen. Either he is going to really start a war or the Chinese and the NORK military are finally going to tire of his sorry as and he will end up shot in the back of the head and put in a shallow grave somewhere.

        1. No no no, he will be assasinated by American Special Forces who used poison to trigger a heart attack in dear leader.

      2. Poor kid never had a little uncle to slap some tiny bit of sense into him.

  58. Alan Krueger was just on Bloomberg, standing on the White House lawn, weeping piteously about the catastrophic effects of the sequester and blaming the lousy economy on it.

    I wish there were somebody, somewhere in the field of “financial journalism” with the balls to ask him, “Doctor Krueger, doesn’t it embarrass you to stand there spouting a bunch of ridiculous nonsense? Don’t you just feel like an idiot, knowing there are people all across the nation laughing at you right now?”

    1. Just for comparison, the stimulus, which did nothing to help the economy, was far, far greater than the amount supposedly not being spent now.

  59. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..-bare.html

    She looks better without makeup.

  60. Your Friday Reason Challenge:

    Read this op-ed by Dimitri Papadimitriou without grinding your teeth enough to pop out a filling.

    “To create jobs, the U.S. must spend:
    The government can and should increase the deficit to return us to prosperity. Without such outlays we can’t get enough GDP growth to seriously attack unemployment.”

    Note that this is coming from a Greek!

    1. We have a trillion dollar deficit.

      1. Exactly. What do you expect to accomplish with such a miniscule deficit?

      2. Jesus, it’s so simple. Massively cut government spending, scope, and regulation, balance the budget (at least to a sane debt load), and reduce the tax burden.

        Boom times or stagnation? Which is better for all of us again?

        1. Depends on who the “us” is. For the people in charge, stagnation is great.

          1. Even they will lose, once the pain gets too great.

        2. John Cochrane has a good blog post about that, where he adjusts the graphs from the CBO’s Alternate Fiscal Scenario to see how additional growth or stagnation would impact their debt and deficit. The problem? The CBO assumes we’ll have 4%+ growth for a few years until we catch up to Potential GDP and the debt numbers are still horrendous.


          1. The only hope of even delaying bankruptcy is to have good growth. But to do that, the progtards would have to give up on the regulatory state.

            1. How can people know how to do anything if there aren’t government rules laid out in micromanaging detail?

    2. I don’t have to read it if you don’t actually link to it. SF’d

    3. How did I SF the link?


      1. I think it happens when people read too much of his fiction. Well, “fiction.”

    4. Well, duh!

      I mean, voluntary transactions that create wealth also create inequality. And we all know that inequality is immoral.

      When the government takes money through coercion and divvies it out according to political considerations, wealth is destroyed. However there is also less inequality.

      Thus the forceful destruction of wealth is moral because it reduces inequality.

  61. http://www.nytimes.com/2013/04……html?_r=0

    Scientists, including those at the F.D.A., have been recommending unrestricted access for years, as have major medical groups, including the American Medical Association, the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, and the American Academy of Pediatrics. In 2011, the F.D.A. commissioner, Dr. Margaret A. Hamburg, issued a statement saying that after rigorous study the agency concluded it was safe to sell Plan B One-Step over the counter. But she was overruled by Ms. Sebelius, the Health and Human Services secretary, the first time such a public countermanding had ever occurred.


    1. If they made it over the counter, it would be really hard to convince low information voters that the evil Republicans intended to ban it. I really think that is what is going on here. They keep those things attainable but not too attainable so they can still make political issues out of them.

      1. Either that or just a kneejerk progressive urge to make people get permission or make things cost more.

    2. Once they make the day after pill available OTC, I wonder how many states will move to further restrict abortion access. After all, women could pop a pill every day they have unprotected sex and their need for abortions as a means of birth control (which the overwhelming majority of abortions are for) would go away.

      Unless, of course, these paternalistic fuckheads don’t think women are responsible enough to use this pill effectively before a fertilized egg implants and the road to a baby’s birth is much more certain.

      1. In a sane world, OTC access to the morning after pill in exchange for real abortion restrictions would be a pretty reasonable compromise. But as you said, it would require women to take some responsibility for their actions. And that is a prospect too horrible to contemplate.

        1. I’m all about the morning after pill, as a relatively high % of fertilized eggs do not become human beings. Once implanted, however, the rate goes up dramatically. That’s why I’ve always drawn my line there on the “life begins at _________” debate. And FWIW, it’s also where I draw my line on when an abortion should be outlawed.

          Not trying to start a horrific abortion subthread on this one, but just making my point. And I hope some severe restrictions on abortions come out of this, because it really is a game-changer.

          1. It is a tough question. But the whole argument is about “unwanted pregnancies”. If you can have the pill that prevents such things and alleviates the need for abortion, that sounds like a good compromise.

            1. But to those who believe life begins at conception, what is the moral difference between the Day After Pill and an abortion?

              1. There isn’t. But it is better than doing it at three months. No one would get quite what they wanted. That is why it is a compromise.

                1. There isn’t. But it is better than doing it at three months.

                  I’m playing Devil’s Advocate here, but why? Is it better to kill a five-year-old than a fifty-year-old? I believe for many who believe that life begins at conception, there can be no compromise. They argue that murder is murder, be it outside the womb or inside. The chronological age of a life is of no consequence to the immorality of the act.

                  1. The idea is that we don’t know for certain when life begins. It is 100% true it begins at birth. And the chances of it being a “life” get less and less the closer you get to conception.

                    Yes, it doesn’t meet the strict definition.

                  2. The chronological age of a life is of no consequence to the immorality of the act.

                    That is true. However, as one of those people, I also acknowledge I can be wrong.

                    Maybe implantation, or differentiation of cells, or beginning of brain activity is a better point. Maybe. I can see valid arguments for all of those.

                    The big question for me, which I cant answer, is: when does the soul enter the body? Interestingly, Thurgood Marshall asked this during the Roe v Wade hearing, but no one gave him a good answer either.

                    Due to the fact that after conception, we dont know if it 1 baby or identical twins or whatever, I dont think the soul is necessarily there yet (or maybe it is, encoded in the DNA), although maybe twins share a soul*, who knows?

                    So anyway, while I think there is some line beyond which killing the child is absolutely murder, the line is vague to me (but much earlier than currently allowed). So, while I personally wouldnt use Plan B for contraception, just in case, I can compromise a bit and allow it, for a tighter restiction after that.

                    *Im kidding, I dont really think this.

                    1. The big question for me, which I cant answer, is: when does the soul enter the body? Interestingly, Thurgood Marshall asked this during the Roe v Wade hearing, but no one gave him a good answer either.

                      SC rulings should not be based on religion anyway.

                    2. As an agnostic, a belief in a soul doesn’t have to have anything to do with religion.

                    3. belief in a soul doesn’t have to have anything to do with religion.

                      As a person who doesn’t believe in the “soul” concept, yes it does.

                    4. As an agnostic, a belief in a soul doesn’t have to have anything to do with religion.

                      Unless you can think of a secular explanation of a soul, then it has everything to do with religion. I don’t know of any atheists who still believe in a soul.

                    5. A secular explanation: The thoughts and memories we have are energy patterns. Energy is never destroyed, just changes form and pattern. The soul is the continuation of the energy past the end of life.

                      Also agnostics aren’t athiests. I’m not saying I believe in a soul, I just recognize that the potential may still be there.

                    6. If you use that justification for a “soul”, then the soul “enters” the body when brain function begins. This would put the beginning of life at around 6 weeks and makes that argument moot against Plan B.

                      If you think that some sort of energy is infused into the fetus at the moment of conception, then you’re arguing a religious view of the soul.

                      I am well aware of the difference between an atheist and an agnostic. However, agnostics can still hold religious beliefs while not being sure if they are correct.

                    7. Also, stating that the energy that contains our thoughts and memories continues after death is a bit religious in and of itself. Science has shown us that our memories and brain functions are still a physical process. Like a computer chip, the electricity that runs our brain still have to travel through a physical medium (neurons). Your memories are not some electric charge just floating through the ether, they are configurations of neurons that fire in a certain pattern.

                      The energy that is in your body after you die dissipates as heat, in this way it is not destroyed, it is converted.

                    8. Energy is never destroyed, just changes form and pattern.


                      The thoughts and memories we have are energy patterns.

                      Since the energy can’t come from nowhere, where does it come from?

                      The soul is the continuation of the energy past the end of life.

                      What itsnotmeitsyou said.

                  3. There is no way to know whether a woman is pregnant within the time period of Plan B’s efficacy. In fact, if taken within 24 hours, there’s a good chance that when she took the pill, the egg was not fertilized. Note that IUDs also prevent fertilized eggs from implanting on the wall of the uterus, although in that case it is a secondary form of contraception.

                    The problem with your hypothetical is that it technically requires every woman who had sex and then menstruated to be investigated for manslaughter somehow, because there are plenty of activities that can cause a fertilized egg to fail to implant. Over-consumption of caffeine is tied to this. Should we ban all woman who are between menarche and menopause from using caffeine because we might be “killing a person”?

                    1. Should we ban all woman who are between menarche and menopause from using caffeine because we might be “killing a person”?

                      I dunno. Maybe that’s why the Mormons do it? πŸ™‚

                    2. The problem with your hypothetical is that it technically requires every woman who had sex and then menstruated to be investigated for manslaughter somehow, because there are plenty of activities that can cause a fertilized egg to fail to implant.

                      Seriously though, I think intent matters. Perhaps that’s due to my religious background (Buddhism), but I can’t think of a religion that equates miscarriage with abortion, for example. Again, I’m arguing from a viewpoint that is not my own, so perhaps my argument is poor because of it, but I’m trying to understand the thinking of someone who would oppose both abortion and the Day After Pill.

              2. But to those who believe life begins at conception, what is the moral difference between the Day After Pill and an abortion?

                Not much. The morning after pills are designed to delay ovulation (and thus, fertilization) and prevent implantation. The latter is where people who believe life begins at conception are conflicted about it, if you sincerely believe that life begins once fertilization occurs.

                Given that not every fertilized egg survives long enough to implant, however, most people who believe life begins at conception would likely be okay with OTC morning-after pills.

      2. After all, women could pop a pill every day they have unprotected sex and their need for abortions as a means of birth control (which the overwhelming majority of abortions are for) would go away.

        A lot of the need for abortions as birth control would go away, but not all, since not all of it results from unprotected sex. Neither the morning after pill, nor birth control pills, nor condoms, nor any other form of birth control I am aware of (other than abstinence, of course) is 100% effective. If you’re on the pill you aren’t going to know it failed until it’s way too late for morning after.

        1. Abstinence has at least one recorded failure.

          1. credible citation needed

  62. “President Obama, just a few months late, will unveil a budget”…

    Maybe, if he ever figures out which way the wind’s blowing, he might have Holder tell us how they’re going to deal with legal weed.

    1. It appears to me that after the sequester failed to throw swing voters into the street in sufficient numbers, the internals for holding the Senate in 2014 demand that the Democrats take some of the budget-passing cred from the ‘Phants.

      1. Well, it does seem that raising taxes pissed off many people and is hurting the economy. So a “budget” that does more of that is sure to be popular.

  63. I didn’t see this covered here. NSFW, but The Atlantic has a great spread of a Femen* protest in France.

    *The topless women’s rights group, not the standins for Bedouin in Dune.

    1. Frankly, I wouldn’t insult Fremen if I were you.

      1. Yeah, good way to end up with a crysknife between your shoulder blades.

    2. It’s the bright blue-glowing aureolae that get the most attention.

  64. Rand Paul’s Op-Ed on mandatory minimum sentencing:


    “Some might think it is unusual for a conservative Republican to join a liberal Democrat on such a bill, but contrary to popular belief, the protection of civil liberties and adherence to the Constitution should be a bipartisan effort.”

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