Unemployment Rate Rises, Mitt and Barry Don't Impress, Irish Spurn Taxes: P.M. Links

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  • And the amazing thing is … You're still going to vote for us!

    Following on the lousy payroll news released yesterday, the U.S. government revealed that only 69,000 jobs were created in May. That's the lowest number in a year and one that drives the official unemployment rate up to 8.2 percent. Hell — even federal employment is down a teensy, weensy little bit.

  • In a move guaranteed to simultaneously tick off many libertarians while also making his campaign more viable, presidential candidate Gary Johnson has qualified for and accepted $100,000 in federal matching funds. The funds come from voluntary check-offs on tax forms.
  • Americans agree! The major-party presidential candidates suck! Just 19% of likely U.S. voters say Romney and Obama are the two best people running for the presidency, according to Rasmussen Reports.
  • Ticked off by theology-offending Obamacare rules requiring employers to pay for contraception, sterilization and abortion-inducing drugs, U.S. Catholic bishops are calling on their flock to defy the mandates.
  • Ireland has imposed a new tax, but of the 1.6 million households in the country, the government says nearly half had refused to register by the March deadline. Hundreds of thousands of Irish say they won't pay — part to deny information to the overnment that it would need to enforce a higher anticipated property tax.
  • About 13 minutes worth of scenes from "Men In Black 3" have been abducted — by Chinese censors. The blue pencil-wielders were apparently offended by material that might, peripherally, suggest that China likes to censor stuff.
  • In the Trayvon Martin case, George Zimmerman's bond was revoked, and he was ordered back to jail, after a judge said Zimmerman had misled the court about his available assets.
  • After being showered with international vitriol, Justice of the Peace Lanny Moriarty vacated the contempt of court conviction that sent honor student Diane Tran to jail for truancy. That's the first step toward giving her a clean record, free of criminal convictions.
  • A Secret Service agent was captured on video engaging in road-rage behavior, including the use of official lights to drive another driver off the highway. A North Carolina TV station traced the license plate to its official source.

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  1. But in Montgomery County, officials ? like Judge Lanny Moriarty, who sent Tran to jail?are tough on truancy.

    Until, of course, someone actually shines a light on their dipshit policy. Then it’s a craven retreat.

    1. Similar to what happened in this case. Of course, you know that light probably wouldn’t have been shone on these cases if the girls weren’t special in some way.

    2. So it appears that contrary to those nasty rumors he isn’t a sheep-shagging moron after all.

      1. Maybe he gave in because he didn’t want anyone to find out about the sheep-shagging.

      2. Just a regular moron.

  2. We asked the man who took the cell phone video if he realized he was breaking the law. He said yes, but pointed out “I certainly didn’t brake check anybody. I don’t think I’ve ever done anything like that in my entire life. I wasn’t cutting in and out of traffic.”

    Let’s see: Speeding, using a cell phone while driving, AND SPYING ON A SECRET SERVICE AGENT. The Treasury Department is going to have to bring its full power to bear on this scourge with a camera.

    1. At least we can all sleep better tonight, knowing that the agent has been placed on paid administrative leave.

    2. He was late for his plane to Whore Island.

      …Too soon?

      1. It’s never too soon for a trip to Whore Island.

        That is what you meant, right?

        1. Hmm, wha? Oh sorry, I was just imagining whore island.

          1. My grandparents went to whore island and all I got was this lousy tshirt.

  3. About 13 minutes worth of scenes from “Men In Black 3” have been abducted ? by Chinese censors.

    Why couldn’t the U.S. government have censored 380 minutes of Star Wars prequel scenes?

    1. …and replaced it with the Muppets cast in all the key roles. That would have been awesome.

      1. Nothing directed by Barry Sonnenfeld can be awesome. Ever.

      2. I thought they already did that and called it “Farscape”.

        1. And it was awesome.

  4. The funds come from voluntary check-offs on tax forms.

    This negates many of the objections I would have.

    1. They’re not volunteering their own money, though. They’re just volunteering the government to spend that much money from somewhere.

      1. Yes, they are. They are voluntarily increasing the amount of their taxes/reducing their returns by checking the box to contribute to the fund. Since I hope most libertarians aren’t stupid enough to do this, this is a great way for Johnson to let statists and idiots pay to benefit us for once, instead of the other way around where they force us to pay for their conventions and primaries.

        1. It says specifically that checking the box does not affect your return in any way.

          So where does the dollar come from?

          1. Wiki says it’s three dollars now, and that checking the box earmarks three dollars of your tax bill for funding elections. So it basically allows you to send a small portion of your taxes to fund something the government shouldn’t be doing rather than all of the other things the government shouldn’t be doing but does anyway.

            1. Money is fungible.

              1. that’s why you should wash your hands after handling it.

          2. Hey, leave the presidential funds checkbox alone. Indignantly unchecking it on Turbo Tax is the only enjoyable part of filling out your 1040.

          3. Ah dang. You’re right. I’m of the notion that taxpayers should be able to either allocate where their taxes go, or check a box to put the money into a general fund to be allocated by legislators. Whatever programs get shortchanged obviously fail to meet popular approval.

            But still, if the fund is already allocated, why let the major parties have it all?

        2. Yes, they are. They are voluntarily increasing the amount of their taxes/reducing their returns by checking the box to contribute to the fund.

          No, they are taking money that the IRS is stealing from everybody, including them, and earmarking $3 of it for a special fund.

          Which means that the money is being spent on an egregiously abusive and constitutional practice, letting the government finance certain candidates, with strings attached.

          1. Whoops, that should read “unconstitutional practice”.

            1. But still, at least you have some choice instead of bending over and saying…”put it where ye may, my lord.”

              It doesn’t bother me at all that Johnson took the money.

              1. Yeah, it’s not like if he didn’t take it we would all get refunds for that money in the mail. It would probably go to more GSA party cruises. I say take as much as you can, I mean it is our money.

      2. I wish we had a whole list of federal budget items that we could check boxes for. I would make sure that all my tax money went to peanut butter awareness promotions.

        1. If POTUS had line-item veto power, the same might also be true.

          Now, I’m not saying that all Prezes *cough Obama cough* would use that power wisely and justly. Just that, in theory, it would help to prevent omnibus bills with pork set aside for, say, The Lawrence Welk Balloon Shower Museum included on 943-page, unread Transportation or Finance bills.

          /pipe dream

    2. He’d be a complete fool not to do this.

      1. Yeah, he would only have half as much probability of winning the election if he didn’t take taxpayer money.

        1. But perhaps now twice as much chance to mess up Mitt’s and Obama’s numbers.

          He won’t pose a threat as a winner but it might force one or both of them to court some libs and indies.

      2. The LP has a long history of principled refusal to take matching funds. I say fuck it, take the money. If you can’t promote your message, no one is ever going to hear about your principled stance in the first place.

  5. According to the isidewith presidential quiz I side with Ron Paul 97% (GJ 95%) of the time and am a “hardcore libertarian.” They did say, however, that I side with Barack Obama on immigration issues, so I’m not sure they know what his actual positions are.

    My results

    1. You assume that Obama has an “actual position” on immigration.

      1. Of course he does.

        Let me go check the polls…

    2. About what I expected, GJ 95%, RP 80%, Romney 57%, Obama 51%.

      http://www.isidewith.com/results/8123394

      1. I got GJ 96%, RP 93%, Rent is too damn high guy 70%, and then Romney @ 68%. Didn’t expect that. Obama was around 50%

        1. I was a bit surprised McMillan and Karger were higher than Paul for me. I guess it both my abortion/immigration stances and my “reform” answers for Social Security and Medicare vs. his “dismantle” answer (although I seem to remember him denying he wanted them completely dismantled).

          1. There were a few questions that were hard to answer. Still, they obviously took the time to go beyond the standard two-party bullshit.

          2. Also, I retook the test, going into every more complex answer. Obama dropped to 18%, Romney to 59%, McMillan to 30%. RP to 90%.

            1. I didn’t realize there were so many more questions (didn’t see the note to expand for more questions) and so I retook it. Same general stuff at the top, but everybody else plummeted, with Obama in last at 11%.

        2. I got 96% Paul, 94% Johnson, 44% Romney and 1% Obama. Does this mean Ron Paul is not quite libertarian enough?

      2. 88% Paul, 84% Johnson, 44% Romney, 3% Obama

        87% Lib, 44% Repub, 18% Green, 3% Dem, 13% Rent too high

    3. I’m 71% with Jimmy McMillen!

      92% GJ
      85% RP

      What’s deeply concerning is they claim I’m 70% with Mitt on Economy, Domestic policy, and Healthcare.

      How the fuck is that possible? I don’t support Obama Care OR Romney Care!

      1. GJ: 96%
        RP: 89%
        MR: 65%
        BO: 25%

        The problem with these sorts of things is that they take what certain candidates say they stand for on face value. The reality is that there’s only a small number of things they really care about, and the rest is negotiable.

        So even if Romney or Obama agree with me on a particular subject, there’s a good chance they’d sell me down the river in order to do something else I’m against.

        1. The reality is that there’s only a small number of things they really care about, and the rest is negotiable.

          This about sums it up right there.

        2. Obama and sell me down the river in one sentence!?!

          RAAAACCCIISSSSTTT!

      2. What’s deeply concerning is they claim I’m 70% with Mitt on Economy, Domestic policy, and Healthcare.

        How the fuck is that possible? I don’t support Obama Care OR Romney Care!

        I know, it says I side with Romney on healthcare and that I side with the Green Party on healthcare too. Uh…the only question I got on healthcare was something about “should immigrants receive healthcare” and I said yes. I looked at the other answers and none of them were nuanced enough, so I just went with yes. And apparently I agree with mass deportation too because I agree with Obama on immigration.

        1. There was a question about whether you supported the presiden’t affordable care act, or something.

    4. I am 92% Ron Paul, 83% Gary Johnson, 3% Barack Obama, 100% awesome.

      1. You cannot be more than 97% awesome if you are 3% Obama.

    5. I got:

      96% Ron Paul

      94% Gary Johnson

      59% Mitt Romney

      13% Barack Obama

      I think the difference between the top two choices might be the AGW question.

      Oh, and the “look at other answers” button gives some great options.

      1. I’m thinking both the AGW and abortion figured highly, especially with RP. Isnt’ RP anti-abortion, but believes it should be left up to the states? There’s a lot of play in there about how libertarians feel about that.

    6. Who the hell is Jill Stein? Green Party?

      95% Gary Johnson (because they didn’t ask about the “Fair” Tax or Guantanamo)
      77% Ron Paul
      67% Jill Stein ?
      56% Mitt
      31% Barry

      The way I see it:

      80% Ron Paul
      75% Gary Johnson

      Fuck the rest.

      1. I was reading up on Jill Stein. The Green Party have many issues in common with the LP (ending corporate welfare, civil liberties, ending the WoD, etc.)The problem is that Stein seems to weigh the issues we are virulently opposed to (like a “green New Deal”, raising taxes on millionaires, etc.) much higher than these things.

        1. Yeah, both Green Party candidates agreed with me on nixing the Patriot Act, no survalliance of Internet, and getting out of Afganistan. Now if they can get over their unnatural fear of guns and love of the welfare state.

      2. They actually did, if you click the “Show more options” button on the tax question. They had a “shut down the IRS and replace the income tax with a FairTax” option.

        1. That was the easiest question on the whole quiz.

        2. What question was that?

      3. 95% GJ
        93% RP
        68% MR
        13% BO

        It says I side with Romney on the Economy and Environment. Given that Romney can’t even figure out how he differs from Obama, I doubt that we truly have similar views. Also, how do I side with Obama on immigration? I’m for open immigration and amnesty. BO’s policies have been worse than Bush II’s. The test was decent but not perfect.

        1. 99% GJ
          91% RP
          86% JM
          84% MR
          5% BO

          98% Libertarian
          84% Republican
          51% Green (not sure how that happened)

          Guess I’m not too surprised about this other then the fact I agree 86% with someone who’s views I really didn’t know anything about. Evidently The Rent Is To Damn High though. I definately wasn’t 100% with all of the options that were provided. I didn’t add my own on any of them though.

          1. Also, the Mitt Romney % defintely seems high to me since I consider most of his views practically indistingueshable from BO who I sided with on no major issues. Maybe he chaged his positions again yesterday.

  6. In the Trayvon Martin case, George Zimmerman’s bond was revoked, and he was ordered back to jail, after a judge said Zimmerman had misled the court about his available assets.

    What a fucking joke this is becoming. The “assets” in question are the defense fund contributed by strangers which were being handled by his lawyers.

    I’d love to see if any another non-rich person has had their bond revoked because they were raising a defense fund.

    1. I frankly think the prosecution is trying to scare him into a plea deal, because they know they don’t have a case.

      1. He’d be a moron to make a plea deal. Especially in this case, since BO and company want this to be a going issue come Election Day, and if the state trial isn’t going on then they’re going to charge him with federal hate crimes just to keep the pot stirring.

    2. The “assets” in question are the defense fund contributed by strangers which were being handled by his lawyers.

      That was my suspicion on seeing the blurb; thanks for saving me from having to RTFA.

    3. Having an unreported passport is kind of a big deal.

  7. Appears Mayor Bloomberg is catching heat:

    http://www.reuters.com/article…..2N20120601

    The cola companies ought to use this moment to bring back fully potent cocoa leaf back into the drinks and dare the government to do anything about it. It’s on, slavers. It’s on!

    1. “Look at the pictures of the old robber barons with their big stomachs out in the ’20s. They were proud that they were fat. They all died young, but they were proud until that.”

      Seriously? This guy is the mayor of one of the largest cities in the world? Are you joking?

      I’m stunned that someone could cram so much wrong into so few words.

      1. They all died young,

        Really?

        Andrew Carnegie lived to be 84.

        Charles M. Schwab lived to be 77.

        And those are just the first two robber barons that I checked from the early 20th century.

        1. But just imagine how much longer they would’ve lived if they weren’t fat tubs!

          1. Kinda like how it’s so obvious that the economy would’ve been waaaaaaay worse if not for the stimulus(es(es)).

        2. Rockefeller came up just shy of 100.

          And of course rarely were any of them fat (at least any more fat than Bloomberg is).

          And most of them were gone by the 1920s.

          That this knucklehead thinks political cartoons from the era depict actual people speaks volumes.

      2. And this is the moron that people want to run as an independent?? Because he’s the worst of both worlds.

      3. I’m really just wanting to rant on what a worthless fuck Bloomberg is. He’s worth $22 billion, he’s mayor of the biggest city in the nation, but that’s not enough. He’s the poster boy for control freak nanny state bastard.

      4. “This guy is the mayor of one of the largest cities in the world? Are you joking?”

        Large cities are large concentrations of stupid. How could someone like him not be mayor of NYC?

    2. “Nobody is taking away any of your rights,” Bloomberg said later in the broadcast. “This way, we’re just telling you ‘That’s a lot of soda.'”

      Asshole, you just told us that. We know your opinion on the subject. We just think it’s bullshit.

    3. Coca leaf. Cocoa leaf isn’t nearly as stimulating.

      1. Yeah, but it ain’t bad. I just had two cups of Yungas.

  8. Circuit Judge Kenneth Lester said Friday that George Zimmerman misled the court about how much money he had available when his bond was set for $150,000 in April. Prosecutors claim Zimmerman had $135,000 available that had been raised by a website he set up.

    I could have sworn (under oath) that the funds from that website were well known at the time of the bond hearing. Anyway, Zimmerman is an idiot for lying (if he did) to a justice system that has a major hardon for him.

    1. His lawyers claim he didn’t realize that the defense fund counted as an asset. Which is fairly believable, since there’s almost no way he could flee the country using that money unless his lawyers helped him do so.

      Lots of people seem to have forgotten that the higher bail requirement is intended to keep people from skipping the trial, not punish the wealthy. Ironically, many of them love Roman Polanski.

    2. I’m not sure he did, but the story said his wife knew and denied knowing the amount of money in the account.

  9. What a fucking joke this is becoming. The “assets” in question are the defense fund contributed by strangers which were being handled by his lawyers.

    It is a joke. A defense fund for someone who’s become a celebrity the was Zimmerman has is going to grow as the trial date approaches. Whatever figure he gave te court regarding his assets is bound to have grown since he was released.

  10. More news from the zombie apocalypse front.

    A 21-year-old college student from Kenya accused of killing a housemate told police he ate the victim’s heart and part of his brain after he died.

    1. A 21-year-old college student from Kenya accused of killing a housemate told police he ate the victim’s heart and part of his brain after he died.

      Maybe couldn’t afford a proper meal due to backbreaking student loan debt? Let’s not be so quick to judge.

      1. And to think, the other day you were all about banning face eating. Glad to see you’ve had a change of heart.

        1. And to think, the other day you were all about banning face eating. Glad to see you’ve had a change of heart.

          First off, I see what you did there.

          Second, I am not about banning face-eating. I just believe that it needs strict oversight and regulation, preferably in the form of licensing and fees, and preferably at the federal level.

          For this, I was called a “slaver,” if you can believe it.

      2. No, all of those types are living of stashes of “free” bagels from the OWS protests.

      3. This cannibal from Kenya, the Florida one from Haiti… I guess we do need immigration, because there are some jobs that Americans just won’t do.

    2. Never fear, tho. The gods sent a coupla honest-to-goodness tornadoes that way as, you know, punishment. Of course, as usual, their aim off and the next town over (~4 miles) took the hit.

      Sorta like what happens when you’re standing to close to a terrorist: collateral damage, shoulda known better than to live so close.

  11. Bizarre cases of fast-food rage, courtesy of CNN.

    1. While I didn’t disagree with anything he said, Anderson Cooper just comes off as a complete douche.

      1. With that mug, Anderson Cooper was born to be a complete douche.

        1. Wasn’t there a new version of Anderson Cooper called the Anderson Cooper 360.

    2. Odd how they talked about having surveillance footage for the first two cases but didn’t show it.

      1. Odd how they talked about having surveillance footage for the first two cases but didn’t show it.

        Maybe litigation is pending?

        I just know that I’m exceedingly polite to fast-food employees. If my order is screwed up, and if I choose to broach the topic, I do it politely and with a smile. This is a good practice anywhere your food is being handled by others, and it becomes even more important at a fast-food joint.

        1. Maybe litigation is pending?

          Then they wouldn’t have had them to start with. It seems more likely that they were chopped on the editing floor.

    3. Farva: “God damnit! Burger punk!”

      1. Farva: Give me a double bacon cheeseburger.
        Dimpus Burger Guy: [into mic] Double baco cheeseburger. It’s for a cop.
        Farva: What the hell’s that all about? You gonna spit in it now?
        Dimpus Burger Guy: No, I just told him that so he makes it good.
        Dimpus Burger Guy: [into mic] Don’t spit in that cop’s burger.
        Farva: Yeah, thanks.
        Second Dimpus Guy: [offscreen] Roger, holding the spit.

        1. Farva: I don’t want a large Farva. I want a goddamn liter o’ cola.

          1. GRADY: Sorry about the delousing. It’s standard procedure.

            FARVA: It’s powdered sugar.

            GRADY: Yes, well…

            FARVA: It’s delicious.

            1. Who wants a moustache ride?!

  12. 2* Are Barack Obama and Mitt Romney the best two people to be running for President?

    The problem with this question is that most people don’t think they’re both great. For instance, someone who thinks BO is the bomb (or whatever the kids say these days) but hate the evil money grabbing Romney will probably answer no. Frankly, I’m surprised anyone answered yes.

    1. Seriously, there is something mentally wrong with anyone who thinks that those are the best possible candidates in a country of 310 million people. There are children who are better qualified than these two jackasses. Especially the one holding the office now, as we know he’s totally incompetent.

      1. I have several people living under the same roof as me who would make better presidents than these two jackboots, including at least two children.

        1. I would be totally OK with the electoral college being replaced with a random phone book search.

          Or whatever they do to summon you for jury duty.

        2. If I were prez I would spend my whole day hanging out and drinking at whatever DC bars had the hottest girls working there. I would consider that to be a huge improvement over any prez we’ve had in my lifetime.

    2. It is possible they are the best two people who were actually candidates for President (and with Obama running unopposed in the Democrat primary he was the best candiate in his party). They are certainly not the best two people out of the entire US population who could have run for President. Then again, the best two people probably would never stoop so low as to be a politician in the first place.

  13. About 13 minutes worth of scenes from “Men In Black 3” have been abducted ? by Chinese censors. The blue pencil-wielders were apparently offended by material that might, peripherally, suggest that China likes to censor stuff.

    “We Chinese censors do not have a sense of irony that we’re aware of.”

  14. Flordia tells a bunch of registered voters that they’re not citizens. Turns out 20% of the people on the list have since gotten citizenship. Tons of outrage over the 20%. Oddly, no outrage whatsoever about the other 80% who were registered illegally.

    1. Good point.

    2. Government Program with 80% Success Rate Slammed by Taxpayers as ‘Outrageous’

  15. Obama snubbed Lech Walesa for being anti-socialist.

    http://pjmedia.com/tatler/2012…..f-freedom/

  16. “And now for something completely different”:

    A teenager in Germany solves 300 year old math problem.

    I figured a story that doesn’t make one lose faith in humanity for once might be a good change of pace.

    1. SucK it, Trebek.

    2. He hasn’t published the proof, and the equation looks WAAAAAAAAY too simple to me. Lots and lots of very smart have been doing numerical approximations to projectile motion in air for decades and the relation would have been noticed by now if it were that simple.

      I “solved” a lot of unsolved problems when I was in high school too, only to later discover that I had made a subtle assumption that wasn’t justified. I’m certain that’s true of his “solution” in this case.

      And don’t get me started on that fraud Ramanujan. The ratio of his flawed proofs to correct ones was like 100:1 and he’s treated as a genius.

      1. I “solved” a lot of unsolved problems when I was in high school too, only to later discover that I had made a subtle assumption that wasn’t justified.

        This. A thousand times this. So much disappointment. Of course I’m the kind of guy who has to burn his hand on the stove. When I was a teenager, I fell for all manner of employment schemes.

        1. I have frequently despaired that numbers do not love me nearly as well as I love them.

        2. Of course I’m the kind of guy who has to burn his hand on the stove.

          I still remember the glorious day when I was ~4 that my mom left the room with the iron on and I touched it. Turns out that yes, it is quite hot.

      2. Reason’s spam filter won’t let me link to the MSNBC article that actually quotes physicists, but rest assured they are quite skeptical.

        One physicists points out (correctly) that if he’s purporting to explain the motion of any real world object (as opposed to a perfect sphere, etc) the Reynolds numbers quickly get high enough to prevent the trajectory from even being analytic, let alone expressible as a one-line equation involving elementary functions.

        1. I majored in physics in college and believe me, you’d assume a horse was a uniform steel sphere if it made the math easier.

      3. The first assumption is to do away with all that quantum mechanics tells us.

        1. To be fair, that assumption underlies all of Newtonian physics.

          1. Then there is still the continuum hypothesis for mechanics. Warranted or not? Who knows…

    3. Ha ha, I found an article that actually quotes, you know, mathematicians and physicists rather than ill-defined “experts” quoted in other articles.

      Hint: they seem to be thinking along the same lines I am.

  17. Fark feedback on a reason article. Enjoy.

    1. It’s probably best to not read Fark comments if your sanity is of any value to you.

    2. Since I can’t visit Fark from work, let me speculate. Lots of attacks on libertarians and excuses for Obama. Did I guesss right?

      1. Sort of. They went for the messenger instead:

        Headso: Yeah, reason.com isn’t on the same level as breitbart or wnd, or something.

        No, see, Reason wants to legalize pot and hates police abuse so they are totally independent thinkers. The fact that they mouth some of the derpiest right wing talking points is just proof of their objective truth.

      2. Holy crap. Found maybe two so far in the comments who even understood the point of the article (DEA is an out of control agency that runs its own agenda). Haven’t seen reading comprehension failure like that since I graded Louisiana fifth grader’s assessment tests for a little extra scratch years ago.

        1. You found two? I couldn’t force myself to read that far. I didn’t even get to one.

        2. They don’t want to understand the article.

        3. Libertarians are Republicans! Ignore! If they say it, think the opposite!

          1. Things were much better when Postrel was in charge. Drink!


            Bag of Hammers
            2012-06-01 10:59:18 AM

            Tad_Waxpole: I see this as a huge positive.

            The DEA is a completely useless government agency and a colossal waste of taxpayer money.

            This. And 20 yeas ago Reason would have made this same point.

            1. Reason is pro-DEA? Seriously? Is there another magazine called Reason that I’m not aware of?

    3. God damn that is a lot of fucking retard.

  18. Is that picture from Bok’s “cartoon” this morning?

  19. That Irish article is an example of what really pisses me off about the press – somehow tax increases are called “austerity”.

    Then again, I think the government might be doing it deliberately – they can say “See, austerity didn’t work” because the minimal spending cuts were sabotaged by the higher taxes and then spend spend spend spend.

    1. Then again, I think the government might be doing it deliberately

      Since not a single person ever (until now) has defined “austerity” as increasing spending, I’m gonna have to agree. Nobody but progressives are that stupid, and no one in office is actually a progressive.

    2. Er, that’s (part of) what the word means. I’m sorry if you don’t like the definition of the word; perhaps you should use a different one.

      1. Re: Tulpa the White,

        Er, that’s (part of) what the word means.

        Austerity means being frugal, non ostentatious, to curtail expenses. It does not mean having your stuff taken from you – that’s called thievery, not austerity.

    1. 1) Urine is fairly sterile
      2) Who the fuck drinks pool water?

      I mean, not that I’d piss in a pool…

      1. I will totally piss in your pool. I can’t think of an occasion where I’ve been in a pool and not pissed.

    2. That guy needs to get together with this guy.

      http://www.dispatch.com/conten…..rrest.html

  20. In the Trayvon Martin case, George Zimmerman’s bond was revoked, and he was ordered back to jail, after a judge said Zimmerman had misled the court about his available assets.

    More likely, Zimmerman didn’t know how much money he was able to get from voluntary donations to his defense fund. By the way, that money is a fund for his defense, not a personal “asset.”

  21. Ticked off by theology-offending Obamacare rules requiring employers to pay for contraception, sterilization and abortion-inducing drugs,

    Because we all know that property rights and the principle of you owning your own fucking money and not the government are based on superstitious myths.

  22. After being showered with international vitriol, Justice of the Peace Lanny Moriarty vacated the contempt of court conviction that sent honor student Diane Tran to jail for truancy.

    Nothing says “lost sovereignty” like a judge vowing to international pressure after ordering something so simple as to imprison a girl whose body and soul clearly belongs to him – that is, The State – just like all little boys and girls in the US.

    1. I kind of assumed that several good ole boys from Willis offered to take a meeting with him in the parking lot if he didn’t get his head out of his ass. If he’s blaming “international pressure”, its a coverup.

  23. Surprise!

    President Obama blames Congress for weak jobs report

    Those evil obstructionist Republicans keeping his jobs bill from being considered by the Senate!

    1. I never saw that one coming!

  24. We suffer because of our steadfast dedication to identity politics, yet continue to clamor for more identity politics. Only we want policy that is meant just for our identity.

    And black Americans are complicit in this decline. Fearing that publicly raising racial issues will undermine the president in the eyes of white voters, African Americans appear to have struck an implicit pact with Obama. Even as we watch him go out of his way to lift up other marginalized groups (such as gay Americans) and call for policies that help everyone, we’ve accepted his silence on issues of particular interest to us. In exchange, we get to feel symbolic pride at having a black president and family in the White House.

    And despite being a bitter disappointment to black people, strengthening many institutions which actively fuck blacks (the War on Drugs for instance) while ignoring other issues, they will still vote for him lock-step. Because, for the most part, Democrats have convinced blacks that the party will look out for them, even when they themselves openly admit that it’s leader hasn’t done shit.

      1. “To maintain their winning coalitions, these politicians usually need to govern in a racially neutral manner”

        Let’s hope that continues.

  25. part to deny information to the overnment

    Probably a typo but I like the new name of “Overnment”

  26. A Real USS Enterprise Could Be Built In 20 Years For A Measly 1 Trillion Dollars! (Place Pinky Finger On Mouth When Saying That)

    In its time, the original Star Trek series has inspired many inventions ? the flip-open mobile phone (based on the crew’s communicators), handheld medical diagnostics (based on its tricorder) ? but now an engineer of 30 years standing says we should go the whole way and build the Starship Enterprise.

    The cost? A trillion dollars (?648bn) ? but if spread over 20 years, argues “Dan”, who has proposed the idea, it would cost only 0.27% of the US’s gross domestic product, or about half what the Apollo project did in the 1960s.

    But can it do wheelies?

    1. Our space guys haven’t even imagined anything beyond low earth orbit in DECADES, and this guy thinks we can just up and go anywhere in the universe with a real life USS Enterprise?

      1. I know a guy on the North Side who can hook up a warp drive in your car real cheap. One the cops will never find.

        1. That’s cool, but what we really need is a deflector array for traffic.

    2. Great. Now all we have to do is collect enough anti-matter to fire those engines. At the current rate of production, about four thousand years give or take a century for enough to get you to Mars in record time.

    3. Why not just build the Death Star?

      http://www.forbes.com/sites/ca…..star-wars/

    1. Wait – that was the Zimmerman bond hearing. Is this some kind of Rickroll? (Georgeroll?)

      1. Right? I mean, he’s decent, but “too hot”? Not seeing it.

  27. A commenter on Jez opens up a can of whoop ass on the “war on women” idiots. Responses include “I stopped reading this comment” and “I want to heart you so I can unheart you” whatever that means.

    1. Only 1 in 3 women think war has been declared on them? So, only 1 in 3 women are morons? On a strictly gender-neutral basis, I would have expected much higher returns.

      1. Oh, I get it now. The other 60% are morons about something else. Duh.

  28. I helped a friend of mine who owns a bar and bottle shop move into his new house last week. Today he presented me with a case of Innis Gunn oak aged beer. It is awesome. I highly suggest it. I’m drinking it fairly steadily at this point.

    1. Wish I was. Coors guy was at my bar the other night giving out their new “pre-prohibition” lager Batch 19. It was actually pretty good. I’m sure it’s not as good as what your having but it was free. It was a full bodied lager, kinda hoppy but not IPA hoppy. Beats the hell out of regular coors but then what doesn’t,

    2. Lechayem!

  29. These guys make a whole lot of sense dude.

    http://www.Data-Privacy.tk

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