Ron Paul

Santorum Out

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Goodbye, candidate Santorum.

Chortle amongst yourselves. 

The Paul campaign reaction: Good show, Rick, and they are fighting on.

Reason archives on Rick Santorum.

UPDATE: And the Romney campaign swoops in. From the Washington Post:

He did not endorse or urge the delegates that he has won to support another candidate, but spokesman Hogan Gidley told MSNBC that the Romney campaign has requested a meeting about an endorsement, which he said Santorum is "open" to.

Is this goodbye candidate Santorum, hello VP Santorum, hello second-term President Obama?

NEXT: Reason TV: Economist Art Laffer On How to Fix California

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  1. I’d be more interested in chortling if the decision wasn’t clearly prompted by scary sick daughter issues. But I’m hopeful this means big increases in Paul’s vote totals going forward, more akin to his performance in Virginia.

    1. It could also be due to his diminishing chances of winning PA. That would be a big black eye.

      1. ^^^ This. He saw which way PA was going and got out while the gettin’ was good.

    2. Yeah, but it’s not like it was a surprise that Santorum’s daughter was critically ill. He’s the one who decided to launch a presidential campaign (which would necessarily require a year or more on the road to be successful) when there was a very realistic chance his daughter could drop dead any second.

    3. Hopefully that’s the results that will occur, and not something like Romney at 90% now that he’s the “presumptive” nominee.

    4. But I’m hopeful this means big increases in Paul’s vote totals going forward

      I highly doubt that the (R)s who were voting for Grand High Culture-Warrior Pope Rick are going to switch over to Ron Paul.

      1. Who voted for Santorum and would consider voting for Paul? Can’t see that as being a very big group. This is good for the Titties but probably too late. Santorum stayed in just long enough to guarantee Romney the nomination. Thanks Rickey, you little bastard.

        1. That’s exactly what I’m thinking. Without Santorum in, Mitt will probably hit the delegates he needs, and no brokered convention.

        2. A Gingrich presidency scares me more than a Romney one, or an Obama 2nd term.

          Although that Obama 2nd term makes you stop and think. Gingrich or Obama II. Talk about shitty possibilities.

          1. Difference?

          2. Obama II is better than any Mitt Gingrich because that leaves the 2016 door open to Rand Paul as opposed to 2020.

        3. The only outside chance Ron Paul has of picking up those votes is to advertise his pro-life bona fides.

        4. Thanks Rickey, you little bastard.

          You wanted Newt to get the nomination?

    5. It means nobody pays att’n to him from now on, and that delegates elected in caucus states from here on probably all go to Romney’s people. So if you want to be a delegate at the nat’l convention, better say you’re for Romney even if you’re for Ron Paul or someone else.

  2. Dude, no salty ham tears photo? What the hell?

    1. Like Roger Sterling said, it’s never as good as you think it’s going to be

    2. I am disappoint!

      1. I searched the page for “salty ham tears” and “salty,” but all I got was your comment and a joshua corning joke at 4:19PM.

        I am going to check the thread to see if there is an equivalent level of glee, albeit without the SHT phrase.

  3. Well, shit. This will just give Gingrich hope.

  4. Will there be a press conference with crying children?

    1. Already done!

    2. Could even be a press conference with dying children! Stay tuned.

      1. It’s not like the kid is just all of a sudden sick. She has Edwards Syndrome, and statistically should have been stillborn or dead by 12-months-old.

        And you know what raises the chances of Edwards Syndrome? Impregnating your 48-year-old wife.

        Even the smallest and most vulnerable of Santorum’s children is just another political prop to him.

        1. I’m still sympathetic. It’s not like this is being used now to promote his candidacy. He’s out.

          1. He’s used her as an argument against pre-natal testing so he can god-bother about abortion.

            I’m sympathy to the child, but blame him for waving her like a bloody shirt.

            1. Well, screw him, but I hope that it works out with the kid.

              1. Based on the WP article, it doesn’t sound very hopeful.

                1. I give the child six months, tops. Realistically, less than three. And I take no pleasure in rendering that opinion.

                  1. Is there really no hope at all, or is that just the odds?

                    1. Honestly, Pro’L Dib? No hope. I’m astounded the child has lived as long as she has. It is a miracle, and I mean that sincerely.

                    2. How terrible. I don’t care how much of a shit Santorum is, that sucks, and I hope things work out somehow.

                    3. Stop with your sickening humanity.

                      Really though, having a kid, especially a daughter, fucks with your capacity for callousness.

                    4. Agreed. Though I’ve always been more empathic than healthy in a libertarian.

        2. Yeah, if you really don’t believe in birth control, maybe you ought to lay off screwing your wife, or at least going inside of her, after she is about 40 and until she hits menopause. Just a thought. But I guess Ricky is a randy little bastard.

          1. maybe you ought to lay off screwing your wife, or at least going inside of her,

            You don’t know if you’re cumming or going, do you?

          2. if you’re Catholic you can use the rhythm method, aka Vatican roulette. Maybe Ricky just ain’t a lucky gambler

            1. The Rythm method while pretty hit and miss is not totally ineffective. It is unlikely to work when you are talking about two young people. But with two people over 40? It is actually pretty effective since it is so hard for a 40 year old women to get pregnant. For that reason I doubt he even tried that.

              1. generally yes, but maybe Karen is super-fertile or something. Fun fact: my mother had all 3 of her children after 40 (and no chromosonal abnormalities), and this was back in the day before reproductive technologies any more sophisticated than a chat-up line

                1. Really? Well, aren’t you just just the bees knees!

              2. The rhythm method is out, Natural Family Planning is in.

                And how could they have anticipated this in advance, anyway?

                1. And how could they have anticipated this in advance, anyway?

                  If there is a suspicion of the possibility of a genetic abnormality, Edward’s Syndrome can be DX in utero.

          3. What’s the official Catholic line on heterosexual buttsex? I suppose the lack of possibility of procreation makes it a no-no (but then would sex after menopause also be bad?). But as far as I know buttsex is not explicitly mentioned in the bible as a bad thing, just men fucking each other.

            1. it’s out too. Something about how male to female genital sex is the only sort that moves beyond using the other person and yourself just for pleasure

            2. IIRC it’s considered OK so long as ejaculation ultimately occurs in the place God intended.

              Though that would involve some potentially unhealthy, er, transportation.

        3. And you know what raises the chances of Edwards Syndrome? Impregnating your 48-year-old wife.

          Because using birth control is a sin.

          So Ricky doesn’t practice abstinence?

        4. And you know what raises the chances of Edwards Syndrome? Impregnating your 48-year-old wife.

          Correct. The risk of aneuploidy and trisomnic abnormalities spike significantly after about age 38 for a healthy and otherwise within norms woman. IMMO, woman after the age of 40 should probably not attempt to conceive children.

          Eggs are time stamped, as Mrs. Santorum, a Master’s level Registered Nurse should know all too well.

          1. Maybe she thought she could have another partial birth abortion.

            1. Those are referred to as “mis-carriages”.

            2. STFU. That wasn’t an abortion, it was surgery with a miscarriage as a side effect.

          2. I suppose nonexistence is better than existence with genetic disorders? Nice of you to make that decision for the potential human being.

            1. I suppose nonexistence is better than existence with genetic disorders? Nice of you to make that decision for the potential human being.

              I don’t see how you plan to get around that with your method…

            2. It’s my medical recommendation, Tulpy Poo, not absolute law. It’s up to parents to decide if they wish to try to have children. There are risks you know. IFH posted that her mother bore her after 40 (one of three siblings, no less), and IFH is pretty much a spectacular batch of awesome.

              And may I remind you that I share your views WRT to life issues.

        5. Having seen 2 Santorum speeches for work (do not ask), he definitely uses his kid as a prop relating to his pro-life stances. He actually talked about how he doesn’t like bringing the kid into the hospital, because people look at her like she should have been aborted (yes, there were audible gasps) but he and his wife chose life.

          Now, me, I’m on the side of “Man, what a completely selfish dick move to bring a kid into the world who will have constant seizures, die before they even hit puberty, and experience incredible and possibly constant amounts of pain”, but then again, I lack the ego of a presidential aspirant.

          1. He actually talked about how he doesn’t like bringing the kid into the hospital, because people look at her like she should have been aborted

            He’s either lying or delusional. I work in a hospital, and that is absolutely not the way that anyone who works pediatrics thinks. Period.

            1. Maybe he meant other patients?

          2. Well, at least the child will be spared the sin of painkillers while going through her excruciating existence which was totally foreseeable.

            I am very, very glad the Santorum will not be President.

          3. Santorum didn’t decide to bring her into the world. The kid was already in the world. I believe Mrs Santorum’s uterus is part of the world?

            The question was whether she should be dismembered in the womb or allowed to live out her existence.

            1. She wasn’t anywhere until she was conceived.

              I’m with Goldwater, except for his failing to mention the heartache this would also inflict on all the other members of the family. That makes him even more of a selfish dick.

              1. That makes him even more of a selfish dick.

                Mrs. Santorum carried her daughter to term, not him.

                If you are going to assign blame, blame her as well.

                I’m pretty sure they both agreed to accept whatever consequences that would ensue, as husband and wife. As is the proper role of parents when deciding as they see fit WRT to their family. We can make value judgements as a disinterested third party, but it is their business, not ours.

        6. And you know what raises the chances of Edwards Syndrome? Impregnating your 48-year-old wife.

          Nice of you to decide for her that nonexistence is better than existence with Edwards Syndrome.

          1. Nice to see you are continuing to be a complete shitbag.

    3. His one daughter always looks like she is about to cry.

      1. Wouldn’t you?

  5. His next gig should be to replace Ryan Seacrest on American Idol.

    I just want to know how many times he’ll end the show with “Santorum, Out!” before someone lets him on the joke.

  6. Chortle among yourselves.

    3, 2, 1, ….

    “Santorum drops out; ***hole remains.”

  7. *in on the joke.

  8. No then/now pictures of his sobbing daughter and shellshocked son? I am disappointed.

  9. Most people stopped chortling at the “Santorum” thing long ago.

    1. Most people who lack the adolescence of a thousand tittering eighth graders, you mean!

      1. I should have qualified that with “mature”.

        1. “maturity” is hugely overrated.

          1. “maturity” is hugely overrated.

            Not true, Kristen; you have sung the praises of being a mature woman.

            1. Maturity in the girly parts and maturity in the boring parts are two different things entirely.

              1. That’s what TiggyFooo tells me.

  10. So, the problem for Paul is that at this point, the media is going to ignore the rest of the GOP nomination, since it’s a “foregone conclusion” that Romney is going to get it without Santorum in there.

  11. The real question is: what’s going to happen to his pledged delegates? Quite a few of the delegates in the SoCon states hate Romneybot so bad that I could see them willing to send their votes Paul’s way if he sticks around until the convention.

    This news calls for a toast.

    1. This. The future is just beginning.

    2. ‘Tis been done in many of the states with pledged delegates. In OK, for example, a state Santorum won handily, the rules allow for a type of “musical chairs” approach to selecting delegates, that is, Paul supporters are Santorum delegates because they were the last in the room. If Santorum had been the nominee, they would have to vote for Santorum, absent a brokered convention where then, after voting, would be free to vote for whomever. Since those delegates are now up for grabs, it will be up to Paul to force a brokered convention, which is unlikely at this point.

      Your point about the Flopney hate is accurate, but he’s in the bag.

      As is Obamney’s re-election.

      1. I don’t agree if, by Obamney, you mean that Obama will win or there’s no difference between the two. Romney has two huge advantages over Obama: (1) He isn’t Obama and isn’t responsible for the long list of missteps, gaffes, and open ineptness we’ve witnessed in our short time with the amateur president, and (2) he’ll likely appoint judges that aren’t willing to completely ignore the Constitution.

        That said, I’m voting for the LP candidate.

        1. That said, I’m voting for the LP candidate.

          Ditto.

        2. To clarify: I feel there is little, except for judicial noms, and even that is iffy, judging by Flopney’s MA appointments, difference b’twixt the two.

          His Pestilency, Obama, is a lock.

          1. Well, no one really knows what he’ll do. Massachusetts isn’t America, so his mutability could work in our favor. Likely better than Obama, but oh, what a low bar that is!

          2. Someone’s got a serious case of premature sour grapes.

            It’s like Fast & Furious and Solyndra never happened with you guys.

            I would vote for George Bush in a heartbeat if he ran against BO. And I hated him.

            1. Horseshit Tulpy Poo; if there is one thing I never, and I mean never, underestimate, is the capacity of the entitlement mind set to throw in their lot with whomever is passing out goodies. People generally don’t like ObamneyCare, but want freebies.

              Exhibit “A”: The Sandra (appropriately named) Flukes of the world.

              Obama is a lock.

        3. “he’ll likely appoint judges that aren’t willing to completely ignore the Constitution.”

          At least, the version of the Constitution the GOP supports, where the Federal Government can do a lot of unconstitutional stuff that the GOP supports, but none of the unconstitutal stuff the Democrats support.

  12. Is this goodbye candidate Santorum, hello VP Santorum

    Dear lord, please no. One crappy Republican on the ticket isn’t enough?

    1. Romney really would be stupid to do that. I seriously doubt that. No one like Santorum.

      1. Yeah, Santorum doesn’t give him a whole hell of a lot, considering Romney was looking to possibly beat him in PA, the only major trophy he could offer other than ostensibly shoring up the base.

        1. But there are about 20 other less loathsome candidates who would do the exact same thing.

          1. Rubio would probably help him with Hispanics; Haley with women, and she would also bring out the inner bigot that lays within so many of the anointed.

      2. Plenty of thick-headed SoCons and their leaders (i.e. Hannity, Beck, et. al.) do.

      3. i agree with John here. Paul needs to go after a Santorum endorsement and offer Gingrich a spot on the bottom of his ticket for the same from him*. If he can capture both, it’ll be one wild convention.

        *I hate Gingrich. He’s a fucking scumbag, but Paul could use the endorsement and Gingrich debating Biden would be one absolutely hilarious ass-whipping.

        1. Gingrich debating Biden would be one absolutely hilarious ass-whipping.

          LOL just contemplating that. Thanks!

        2. But he’d be a fun president. I mean, like historically entertaining. Not like Obama, who is boring.

    2. Seriously, who will the Romney VP be? Christie? Rubio? I’m not sure on this one.

      1. I predict Crispy Christ Christie, The Corpulent Jesus, The Fred Flinstone of NJ, The Girth of the GOP, The Stately Statesman…need I go on? I could do this all day.

        1. Is Nikki Haley really removing herself from consideration?

          And I am still holding out hope that (if he gets the nominee) he’ll tap someone with Paul in their name, be it Ron, Rand or Mr. Ryan.

          1. That’s an outside possibility, but pretty unlikely.

          2. That’s an outside possibility, but pretty unlikely.

      2. Either them or Thune. Perceived as more conservative, won’t offend anyone; Also Thune IS the handsomest Senator to vote for TARP.

        1. Yes, he’s so dreamy!!!

          *barf*

      3. I’m going with Rubio.

        Haley might be just fine, but its just too soon after Palin to trot out another good looking female governor.

        1. I’d say that’s the odds-on favorite, but I’m not convinced that’s where Romney will jump.

      4. Honestly, the best we can hope for is probably Mitch Daniels.

    3. It never is.

  13. Is this goodbye candidate Santorum, hello VP Santorum, hello second-term President Obama?

    Good question. How often does the second place vote-getter end up on the ballot as the VP candidate? I remember that happened with Kerry/Edwards in 2004, but I can’t think of any other occasions.

    1. Santorum as VP is a terrible idea. He sheds Romney as many votes as he gains, maybe 2-to-1 in the general.

      1. You don’t think Santorum would make a good #2?

        1. Most people stopped chortling at the “Santorum” thing long ago.

        2. 2 + 3 is technically a #5.

        3. Good #2

          I see what you did there.

      2. But he provides balance: flip-flop (you don’t stop) on one side, ideologue on t’other

        1. YAY! The spunky sheila returns!

        2. yep, back with the usual third-rate antipodean snark. You’re easily pleased doc.

          1. I prefer to think I have refined and discriminating taste. It stinks when you’re waggin’ school.

    2. Reagan Bush in 1980.

      Santorum stayed in just long enough to make sure Romney won the nomination and every other candidate was fucked. Maybe it was part of some deal. I don’t know.

      1. Maybe it was part of some deal. I don’t know.

        The typical payment for stepping aside/support are cabinet postings. Ambassadorships are reserved for donors.

        1. Well, Santorum at HHS would serve the feminists right.

          1. Awesome!

      2. Maybe it was part of some deal. I don’t know.

        No deal.

        He is fucking broke and that is all:

        http://campaign2012.washington…..ebt/472906

      3. Ron Paul was never going to get the nom and I hope for the sake of your eternal soul that you didn’t want Newt to get the nom.

        Everybody else had problems long before the Santorum surge.

    3. Reagan and GHW Bush.

      Romney – Rob Portman is the inside favorite. Ohio is a must win for the GOP.

      1. We barely know who Rob Portman is here in Ohio, shrike, let alone him having any weight on the national stage.

        1. All the VP pick can do is win his home state.

          (on the positive side – not talking a negative like Palin)

          1. God, the thought of gagging on Sarah Palin’s panties gets me hard.

        2. Agree about Portman, Randian. I can’t see that spurring anyone to come to the polls, except maybe Portman’s mother.

          1. Shrike gets most of his political predictions from the fundies who live in his underwear. Mittens is going to go for a splash VP, not a never heard of him.

            1. It’s gotta be Nikki Haley — assuming he can’t get Condi.

              1. Is Paul Ryan definitely out?

                I think Nikki Haley is a terrible choice, mostly because it would energize the feminists. Which is ironic.

                1. Aren’t the feminists going to be energized and butthurt no matter what? Isn’t that just what they do? Act butthurt and run out and vote for the Democrat?

                  1. Isn’t that just what they do?

                    Nothing, not even Santorum, pisses them off like conservative women. A male conservative is par for the course, a female one is an intimate betrayal of the bonds of the moon blood cult.

                    1. Nothing, not even Santorum, pisses them off like conservative women.

                      Especially physically attractive ones.

                  2. “Isn’t that just what they do?”

                    Yeah. And no one who is likely to vote republican is listening to them anyway. I hope he does pick her, or Condi (I have no idea if that is a serious possibility). I would just love to see the knots the usual suspects will tie themselves into if there is a female non-white person on the republican ticket. For similar reasons, I was disappointed that Cain didn’t last longer, even though he was a crazy weirdo.

                  3. Halely also had the gall to say that not all women care about birth control. The feminists will go batshit.

                    On the other hand, Condi will bring out the civil liberty libs (who, other than Greenwald, are willing to tie themselves into knots about how Obama will change) plus you have the Bush years connection.

              2. Is that too close to a Palin repeat? Although Hailey could play the racism card when the hen squad at the NYT and WAPO went after her.

              3. I hope not, ethics charges were just brought against her.

                I actually would not be surprised if Rand is picked.

                1. Deej

                  I know someone with that nickname. You didn’t play basketball for PSU did you?

                2. Deej,

                  Do those charges have any merit? I would imagine they are about as credible as the ones brought against Palin. If you are women or minority Republican and you don’t have liberals filing spurious ethics charges against you to derail your national potential, you are probably not doing something right.

                    1. Does it matter? Probably have to treat the VP candidate like Caesar’s wife.

                    2. This is pretty mush the story of her term so far, butthurt Dems filing complaints etc. trying to make anything stick.

                    3. The complaint – initially filed in July by Bridget Tripp, an employee of the state Democratic Party – accuses Haley of misreporting more than $1.3 million in contributions by failing to maintain proper records of donors’ occupations and not disclosing contributors’ addresses.

                      Meanwhile Obama is taking in hundreds of millions of dollars in contributions via untraceable credit cards on the internet.

                    4. That’s it? Technical non-compliance with a reporting rule?

                      Weak. Sauce.

                      A smart Dem would absolutely not want to get into a pissing match with Repubs over fundraising practices. Obama is a walking, talking advertisement for full federal funding of elections.

                    5. One who said that were smart? And two, never underestimate the media’s ability to ignore Democratic hypocrisy.

  14. Has anyone seen the Moose? He should hear about this.

    1. Are you suggesting a new thread where he could run free, like the moose of his homeland?

      1. A moose once bit my sister.

        1. did she bite it back?

          1. Warty ate it first. Whole. After molesting it prior to ingesting it.

        2. Same moose. That’s who Python was talking about. Note the discussion of fjords.

      2. Yes dammit! We need a thread as wide as the open plains, as deep as as a picturesque lake, as strong as a black market liver, and as pointless as a Cubs game. A place where from now until eternity, the comments flow as freely as…um….as…

        1. I hereby request that this thread be donated to the Viking Moose of Midwestria, for his exclusive and perpetual domain. And lo, did the moose graze and become one with the fjords and llamas.

  15. We have already said “Hello second term Obama”, we should be saying “Would you like a second cup of coffee?”

    1. *thought bubble*

      “John never has a second cup of coffee at home…”

  16. Even if Romney can get the delegates he needs, Ron Paul can still torpedo his campaign by staying in the race till the convention and not endorsing him. I would love to see a Ron Paul-Gary Johnson alliance.

    1. What would a Ron Paul Gary Johnson alliance do other than assure Obama a second term?

      I would love to live in a world where enough liberals cared about civil rights enough to turn on Obama. But that world exists in a parallel universe not this one.

      1. Opening salvo of the Romney Apologia, John?

        1. If you think Romney losing is a good thing, then say so. But lets not pretend that a serious third party run does anything but save Obama from certain defeat.

          1. Because things will also go to shit under Romney and I don’t want our dumb country to be bamboozled by socialists like Elizabeth Warren who will blame it on the free market and capitalism. Romney will be more dangerous to liberty in the long-run than Obama will in that regard.

            1. I’m with ASM on this one. I don’t see Romney and Obama as being very different on any major policy, and a Romney presidency will be enough for diehard leftists to declare that anything bad that happens is due to his pro-business approach.

              1. You are correct about that. The question is does Obama’s second term ending in epic disaster mean we get smarter or just double down on stupid?

                1. I think we get stupid either way, but at least this way the Republican party pretends to give a shit about separation of powers and presidential authority for another 4 years.

          2. Romney losing might keep the GOP casting about for someone with significant policy differences with the Democrats, for starters.

            1. Or it will cause them to turn to the SOCONs after nominating a mushy centrist.

              1. I think that ship has sailed.

          3. In the short run. But unless you think he’s going to irreversibly fuck us and that Romney isn’t, it might more worthwhile to worry about the long run — automatic ballot access would be great for the LP, and influx of Paulites might be good too — they seem a little more organized and practical than the LP organization itself. In the great but unlikely event of hitting 15%, there’s a national platform that can help things take off further.

        2. Why don’t we have any Santorum supporters here?

          I am dismayed at the reason comemntariot’s lack of diversity

        3. Are you fucking MNG or something?

          1. I’m just waiting for Tulpa and John to start work on their pro-Romney book.

            1. Fuck off Joe. Where did I say I was voting for Romney?

              1. You haven’t. You’re not voting. But that doesn’t mean you won’t be singing his praises in the next seven months.

                1. When I do that Joe, why don’t you tell me all about it. In the mean time until you actually have a post of me saying anything nice about Romney, why don’t you shut the fuck up. How about that idea. Where the fuck have I ever sang the praise for Romney? Nowhere.

                  So go fuck yourself with a ball bat.

                  1. In all seriousness, what scares you about Romney? I think he would be a do nothing caretaker President.”

                    Calling a contemporary politician a do nothing caretaker is about as nice as it gets in libertarian circles. 😛

          2. Has MNG been around at all since The Registration?

            1. I don’t recall seeing him.

          3. Don’t know why I turned black.

      2. A Paul-Johnson alliance seems like it could possibly get the Libertarian party above 5% or whatever the line is to get automatic ballot access. How much good that would actually do is debatable, but I tend to think that more parties on the ballot is a good thing.

      3. I’m already resigned for an Obama second term and yes things will really go to shit under his leadership, but then again that may finally discredit liberalism as a governing ideology and people may finally vote for someone tolerable like Rand Paul.

        1. I think that some days. But then I wonder what damage he would really do. I think a second term Obama would be arrogant and stupid enough to invoke a real constitutional crisis.

          The real problem with a second term Obama is that it would ensure that liberals don’t even pretend to care about civil liberties for another four years. Sure, they would only care about civil liberties under a President Romney because they are hypocrites playing team ball. But sometimes doing the right thing for the wrong reason is the best one can hope for.

          1. Okay, I thought of a pro of a Romney presidency: Supreme Court Justices.

            1. YES^^

            2. I’m not convinced. Conservatives and liberals both appoint crappy justices. They should just put me in charge.

              1. Oh, you’re definitely correct, but our best hope is to maintain as close to a 50/50 split as possible with an odd number of Justices, so we get lucky sometimes. Tipping the balance too far one way or the other would be bad news, I think. Obama got his two noms, and Bush had two before that. Time to flip back the other way.

                1. I’d like one or two libertarian justices.

                  1. Thomas is such a tease.

                  2. I’d prefer nine, or at the very least five.

        2. My problem with that is that I think we’ll double down on stupid if things get worse. Either more government from the left, the right, or outright tyranny.

          1. It’ll be tough, but I honestly think that it will take an economic apocalypse for Americans to finally wake the fuck up. As I said above, I would prefer Obama to be in charge when that happens so people will finally reject liberalism for the sham it is.

            By continuing to run and have supporters take over Republican party positions like he has done in Iowa and other states, Paul will lay the groundwork for a Rand Paul run in 2016.

  17. Santorum finally stops running.

  18. Also you have to think Paul will now do much better in Texas and California since I can’t imagine Santorum’s supporters will vote for Romney. Not saying they will vote for Paul, but he should get a higher precentage of the vote now.

  19. Ambassadorships for everyone!

    Ricky gets the Vatican, Ron Paul gets some sort of Ambassador to the EU post, and Newt gets France. Why France? Fuck em if they can’t take a joke, that’s why.

    1. I want the Court of St. James. So I can be a character in a Bond flick.

      1. I want Prague or Vilnius. I want a post with large numbers of beautiful women.

        1. well that’s one way to promote friendly relationships between countries

        2. Russia is also good. You could operate a sideline of importing Russian wives into the U.S.

        3. Right and with a small, insignificant country that doesn’t require a lot of maintenance so there won’t be a lot of hubbub when the scandal breaks.

          1. Exactly, a small country where no one will notice the large female only parties at the Ambassador’s residence.

        4. I’ll take Ukraine. I’ll be there already.

          1. I think it’s wrong that you engage in the slave trade like that.

  20. SANTORUM!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!! WHY!!!!!! WHY!!!!!!! HOW CAN YOU LEAVE US!!~! YOUR COUNTRY NEEDS YOU!!! WAAAAAIL!!! SOB!!!

    That said, I’m calling Marco Rubio as Romney’s eventual running mate. You heard it here first.

  21. Shortest Doherty post yet. My speculation is that he posted it from his bunk.

    1. are you accusing him of one-handed typing?

    2. That’s…eww. Do you mean “bunk bunk” or “bunk bunk”?

  22. I have been waiting 4 years for a follow up photo of salty tears..

    WTF?!?!?

  23. John: “I will never vote for Romney.”

    1. Romney-Zimmerman would fire him up enough to.

    2. Oh Tony. Next you will be telling us how angry you are about Obama’s civil rights record and abysmal scandal ridden administration. You are so angry, you are going to go out and work for his campaign and vote for him two or three times thanks to Eric Holder. But you are not going to like it.

      Shut the fuck up sock puppet. The adults are talking.

      1. Don’t John. Just don’t. Just walk away. It’s just an extra-corporeal spoof.

      2. In your defense, your eventual support of Romney was completely predictable.

        1. Where have I supported Romney. And in your defense, you pathetic support of Obama no matter how incompetent he is, was completely predictable.

          1. He’s gone longer than Bush with no major American skyscrapers destroyed and no wars started based on lies, so I’ll take him. Romney has baggage… namely the Republican party. The most incompetent political party in the industrialized world.

            1. Bush sucked, but I’ve got to assume that is some seriously bad faith trolling to bring in terrorism nonsense like that. Bush also went seven years after 9/11 btw.

            2. He’s gone longer than Bush with no major American skyscrapers destroyed and no wars started based on lies.

              I am positive that if Gore was in the White House those same towers would have been hit.

              Also Libya is based on a lie, and Obama had no problem staying in Iraq and staying in Afghanistan long after he promised to bring the troops home.

              http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p12cAclNCRU

              Obama is a liar liar pants on fire.

            3. also, unlike Bush, he’s ordered a hit on a US citizen. What’s not to love?

              1. Obama also went to Libya without congressional approval.

    3. In other news: Tony and shrike will vote for Obama because he’s just the bestest evar!!!!

        1. Is that Obama or Jaleel White?

  24. “Romney squeezes out Santorum.”

    1. Romney squeezes until Santorum drops out.

  25. As long as the SC throws the health care law out, what would be so wrong about a 2nd Obama term paired with a Republican Congress?

    1. I think that’s really the best outcome that is remotely probable. I don’t want to see an all Republican government. And I don’t see Dems making any gains in congress, especially if Romney wins. I predict the senate goes republican and Obama wins.

      1. I predict the senate goes republican and Obama wins.

        Obama will be running against Bush.

        Voters are more likely to forget Bush then $4 a gallon gasoline and 9% unemployment and 10% inflation.

        Its the economy stupid.

  26. Romney picks Christie. Christie says some loud mouth remark about women. Pencil in another 4 spot of Obama. Take it to the bank.

  27. Best case scenario at this point:

    1) PPACA shot down thoroughly by SCOTUS.
    2) Obama/Romney/Johnson/Other = 47%/46%/6%/1%
    3) GOP expands lead in House
    4) GOP retains filibuster-capable minority in Senate

    4 more years! (Of gridlock!)

    1. 2) Obama/Romney/Johnson/Other = 47%/46%/6%/1%

      pfffft

      Obama will lose by a land slide.

      and there is more of a chance of the GOP losing the House then of them not gaining the Senate…look at which 3rd of the senate is running this time around….and that chance is very very slim.

      1. We will have a republican president a republican house and a republican senate…

        And it will suck.

        But we might actually have a slightly smaller (though ever expanding) budget then we would have had.

        After that they will do multiple stupid things and lose the whole thing by 2018.

        1. We will have a republican president a republican house and a republican senate…

          And it will suck.

          That’s why I called it the “best case scenario”. It’s what I want to happen. Not what I think will happen. I’m not coming at this from a pro-Republican standpoint. I’m pulling for gridlock.

          1. Well, if we’re going all fantasy island:

            Romney drops out, and endorses Paul. Johnson drops out of the LP race, and comes back to be Paul’s VP. The October surprise is Obama’s impeachment and removal from office. Paul/Johnson crushes Biden/Reid in the general 86% to 13%. Every incumbent in both houses loses to an unknown NPA or Independent libertarian. Most Californians and New Yorkers renounce their citizenship and emigrate to France in protest.

            That’s how you do a totally unrealistic best case scenerio.

            1. That, Dr., was awesome. I think I need a cigarette.

              1. The only thing lacking to make that last part perfect in my world would be to write it…cut off their balls or undergo sterilization,renounce their citizenship and emigrate to France in protest.

            2. God dammit. It’s not a best case scenario if it has no chance of happening.

              On my fantasy island:

              I discover that I have miraculously developed immortality and god-like powers. The rest writes itself…

  28. Santorum will be Sect. of War

    I hope the music when he said his farewell was this Its the only appropriate song for Rick 3:30-3:45 in particular!

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