Media

Keith Olbermann: More Like a Chandelier Than Even He Realized

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During a recent appearance on David Letterman's show, deposed Current TV host (late of ESPN, Fox, and MSNBC) Keith Olbermann likened himself to a "$10 million chandelier" while complaining that Al Gore's much-ballyhooed cable channel just didn't get its act together.

"It's my fault that it didn't succeed in the sense that I didn't think the whole thing through," Mr. Olbermann said on CBS' "Late Show," discussing his dismissal from the avowedly liberal cable network less than a year into a five-year, $50 million contract.

"I didn't say, 'You know, if you buy a $10 million chandelier, you should have a house to put it in. Just walking around with a $10 million chandelier isn't going to do anybody a lot of good, and it's not going to do any good to the chandelier."

"You're the chandelier?" Mr. Letterman asked.

Yes, Mr. Olbermann replied.

[Story continues after 12 second video!]

Over at the Washington Times, Patrick Hruby tallies up the ways in which various observers agree that Olbermann is in fact like a chandelier:

The immodest, self-serving comparison prompted a series of snarky Twitterbon mots: "OLBERMANN CHANDELIER now available at Ikea," wrote television writer and Vanity Fair magazine contributor Nell Scovell. "Combine with POMPÜS DINING TABLE and SMÜGG CHAIRS."

"Keith Olbermann says he's a 10 million dollar chandelier," wrote Warren Holstein, a New York City-based standup comedian. "Mitt Romney offers to buy him, hang him and turn him off."

"Fragile?" wrote conservative commentator S.E. Cupp.

And there's these: chandeliers look down from above, are brittle, a pain to work with, mostly for show, and more.

Read the whole thing here.

Back in November 2010, Reason.tv compiled this minute-long memorial tribute to Olbermann after he was "indefinitely suspended" by MSNBC for running afoul of the network's rules on giving to political campaigns (the suspension didn't last very long). Whether he reappears on the small screen again, we'll always have this triple-distilled medley of his greatest hits:

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  1. Morning Links FAIL.

  2. I first read that as More Like a Chandler. Could I BE any less observant?

    1. Did the same thing. Then again, I’ve always been a bit… well… lots of things.

    2. I read it as ‘chandelier’, but pictured a candelabra in my head. You don’t want to know where that line of thought ends up, but it starts with Al Gore decked out like Liberace.

  3. Worst chandelier in the woooooooooooorld.

    1. +?
      Yes, stupid filter, that was in Engrish.

  4. Wait, wut? People still watch TV? The only thing it is good for is live sports, anymore.

    I even think I get Current TV in HD. Do they even broadcast in HD, or does that leave too much of a carbon footprint?

    1. * [don’t]

  5. Unlike a chandelier, Keith gives more heat than light

    [cue physics nerd who will point out, in fact, chandeliers also give more heat than light]

    1. You know, chandeliers using incandescent light bulbs actually…oh.

      1. *pushes glasses up nose*

        1. Don’t forget to adjust your pocket protector, db.

        2. dWEEb

  6. Sorry, but has anyone heard exactly what it is alleged that Olbermann did to get fired from Current? I haven’t seen any specifics and it seems like it would have to have been pretty bad given the terms of his contract.

    1. He didn’t like the studio facilities and the production quality, etc. They weren’t commensurate with his magnificence or something.

    2. From what I’ve seen, Current alleges that he didn’t show up to work quite often and also failed to do promotional work that was part of his contract.

    3. All of the reports I’ve seen say it was because he was being himself. You know, a giant douche.

    4. I believe the specific incident was when he blew off showing up the day before (or maybe the day after) Super Tuesday.

      Based on personal observation, I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that attendance failures are the leading cause of for-cause firings out in the business world, certainly among blue and pink collar workers.

      1. I heard something about him getting into a dispute with a company that contracted with Current to provide limousine service. What I had read (on Yahoo) was something to the effect that he was pissed because one of the drivers had the nerve to try and speak with His Assholeness.

  7. Sounds to me like he knows what he is doing. Wow.

    http://www.Anony-Surf.tk

  8. Just walking around with a $10 million chandelier isn’t going to do anybody a lot of good, and it’s not going to do any good to the chandelier.”

    Um, if I’m the chandelier, yes it will. Really though, does this jerk have so much money and, especially, so much in the line of job prospects that he can just continue going through life acting like a douche?

    1. When it’s not an act it’s not as easy to change.

    2. Well if you ever watch cable news, being a douch seems to be more of a feature than a bug in that realm.

  9. Someone needs to hire Olbermann for ten million dollars a year so he can complain about the one percenters. It should be in his contract that the little people he is fighting for are not to talk to him.

  10. What a pompous assclown. Why anyone ever thought that making a failed sportscaster (all you have to do is make halfway snarky comments ever sports highlights, and he sucked at that even) a “serious” TV pundit was a good idea is beyond me.

    1. Truly – that was worse than putting Dennis Miller on Monday Night Football.

  11. $10,000,000 chandelier?

    More like a two-bit pundit.

  12. Maybe the facilities sucked because too much money was tied up in shitty hosts.

  13. Well, Keith Olbermann does have the tendency to come crashing down to comedic effect, so, yeah, he’s kinda like a chandelier, I guess.

    1. Yeah, I’d love to see him a year from now arrested drunk, dishoveled, and broke with a Nick Nolte style mugshot and a recording of his arrest with him going off about the jews Mel Gibson style. That would be a fitting and just ending to an intolerable career.

  14. So this morning I was watching a video tape of the 1996 Formula 1 race in Brazil. After the race was over, a bit of ESPN2’s SportsCenter was on the tape, hosted by Dan Patrick and….Keith Olberman.

  15. Keith Olbermann likened himself to a “$10 million chandelier”

    A masturbatory display of wealth that is easily breakable?

  16. Chandelier? Try dim bulb.

    -jcr

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